Chapter 9 - The Hell Mouth Hath No Fury

Buffy had grown used to having hands all over her, though mainly it was her husband and his rituals of feeling the babies move for hours at a time. Occasionally Dawn would indulge herself, but presently there were ten hands looking for the prime spot on the globe that was the Slayer."I don't think we're gonna get much action, there really isn't much room in there...no more kickboxing matches in the Buffy Arena."

"They've always got one for daddy....come on lil' bads...." Spike sing songed. Not too long after he was rewarded by what felt possibly like a hand pressing back against him palm. He and Buffy shared a knowing look, but Willow caught the exchange and scowled.

"No fair!" she complained, looking at Spike.

"What can I say? They make their father proud."

"Xander.....what are you doing?" Buffy asked as her friend's hand moved back and forth over his allotted space.

"Rubbing the Buddha for luck," he replied with a grin. Willow rolled her eyes and nudged his hand away and took up residence in his spot. A minute later, both babies tried to stretch out, sending a ripple of movement all over, causing Buffy great discomfort. She groaned and waded through the moment, while everyone else smiled and laughed, oblivious, except for Spike.

"Love, you seem a little tired, a nap?" Spike asked. The others were about to protest, but Buffy was already struggling to her feet and Spike was pulling her into his arms. As they approached the bedroom, Buffy sighed and sagged against him.

"Thanks for the save," she said,"I don't like being a sideshow attraction."

"They're just excited, don't expect any of them have really been this close to a pregnant woman, rather they've never had a friend who was one. It's different for us....we live it everyday."

"I live it everyday." They entered the bedroom and Spike went ahead to arrange pillows to prop her up before helping his wife settle down. He lay her chenille blanket over her entire body and leaned down to kiss her forehead. Afterwards he knelt before her, hand placed over where his children were nestled.

"I know that it's you that doing all the work....and I'm just sitting back being the proud father...but Buffy, I do live it everyday. I hear their heartbeats every second, I feel their blood moving in their bodies, I know they feel it when I'm near. They know I'm their father, that I love them and have sworn to protect them. Sometimes I think I hear their thoughts..."

"You do?" He nodded his head and leaned in close.

"Not thoughts like you and me....just the emotions....they love us too."

"What do you think they dream about? They've never seen the world, never heard it, they don't know how bad it is."

"I think maybe they dream about.....about where their souls came from.....Heaven? Colors, emotions, sounds that we have forgotten in our years on Earth."

"That's beautiful Spike."

"Yeah, well, I have my moments. Take a sleep, love. I'll have dinner ready for you when you wake up.....Harris n' I are going out on patrol again, probably take the Watcher along too, but I'll make sure Dawn and Red are here for you. Love you, my precious...." He kissed her lips and tucked the blanket around her shoulders before making for the door.

"Spike?"

"Yes, sweetness?"

"I love you too."

***

Once again Xander took all the glory and fireworks home from this night's patrol, letting Spike rest on his laurels of having single handily protected all of Sunnydale for the past 8 and a half months. Giles nearly had a coronary when the young man took out four vampires without breaking a sweat or making a single error in technique. Xander seemed every bit as apt as Spike or Buffy now. Moreover he looked suspiciously like he was having fun.

"Did you know about this?" Giles asked of the vampire on the walk home.

"Oh yeah....crouching tiger, hidden dragon....that's our whelp," the vampire replied with a laugh, then corrected himself when Xander turned around to glare at him,"Harris...whelp no more....full grown...mad bastard with a stake.....vampire will behave now." Giles laughed out loud at the exchange, Spike and Xander getting along was enough to make anyone a bit giddy. Coming close on Revello Drive and less than a block from the house Spike suddenly stopped dead, Xander and Giles continuing on until they noticed the vampire had fallen back.

"Spike?" The blond was quiet and still, almost as if he were listening for the movement of something hidden,"Something the matter?"

"Buffy..." he gasped as he snapped into a sprint towards home. The remaining two exchanged looks of panic before pursuing the father-to-be. Spike came upon the house with all his senses a flare, back with Giles and Xander he was overcome with a sensation similar to have a bucket of ice water thrown in his face. Every synapse had fired at once and he knew by instinct that Buffy needed him. Twenty strides from the front door, it swung open and Buffy came out, Dawn and Willow supporting her on either side. His wife's face told him all, she was in pain, she wasn't in control and she was frightened. When Buffy saw him she couldn't stop herself from bursting into tears from the relief."BUFFY!?" She reached for him and broke away from her sister and friend and fell into his arms. For a moment she clung to him for all he was worth, overcome with emotion, but suddenly she pulled back and grabbed him by the lapels of his duster and lifted him above her so he was standing on the tips of his toes, dumbstruck by her display of strength.

"If I get through this I swear to god you are dust, William!!" the Slayer seethed. She spun him around and pushed him off the porch,"Hoof it...in a rush here!" He turned around, begging for an explanation.

"She's in labor," Willow shrugged, slinging a knapsack over her shoulder,"Her water's already broken...contractions are about 15 minutes apart....she's in a bad mood because she ruined her chenille blanket..." Buffy marched purposefully on her own steam towards the SUV parked in the garage. The witch passed the stunned vampire and patted his arm in support. Dawn closed the front door, bringing Buffy's hospital suitcase with her and taking Spike's hand.

"Don't take it personally, she's really glad you're here...she kept saying how much she needed you...ready?"

"Huh?" Spike sort of said.

"Entered into the blithering idiot stage of birthing coach I see, good for you. Come on...you're driving."

"Huh?"

"SPIKE!!!!!!!!!!" Buffy screamed into the night, shaking her husband from his coma.

"Buffy!!!!" he shouted in reply, running after her. Dawn rolled her eyes, sighed and sauntered towards the garage. Halfway there she met Giles and Xander who were just catching up.

"Dawn?!" Giles pleaded.

"Relax....she's just ready to have the twins...if you want my opinion I think they're too nuts to be parents...oh well, should've thought of that months ago. The Hell Mouth hath no fury like a Slayer in labor. You coming?"

to be continued.....

Chapter 10 - Speedbumps on the Road to Bliss

One would have thought the Hell Mouth had opened the way Spike had driven them to Sunnydale Memorial. Truth was he didn't even remember the actual drive, he was at home one minute and the next he was bursting through the ER doors with Buffy in his arms and the Scooby Gang in tow. The nurses on call told the manic blond man to calm down and seat Buffy in a wheelchair, there would be a bit of a wait. Suddenly Spike found himself restrained by Giles and Xander and Buffy's hand covering his face. Apparently he'd inadvertently slipped into his demonic visage and was about to tear the nurse limb from limb. Willow retrieved a wheelchair for Buffy and Spike came to his senses and attended to his wife's needs while Dawn took care of the business end of things. She casually waited for the nurse to finish checking in the patients that came before.

"Hello, my name is Dawn Summers and that's Mr. and Mrs. William Summers, we have the birthing room on the fourth floor reserved and left available for us. Could you also page Dr. Ravi please?" the young woman asked. The nurse brightened at the mention of the last name Summers.

"Oh! We've all been interested in meeting you! The donations your family has made to the hospital have been so generous."

"They're special that way....but really, they just wanted to guarantee they got the good room....it's twins you know?"

"That's so wonderful...my name's Caroline, by the way....tell you what, I'll just ask Nora to cover the desk and I'll escort you and your...are they all attending the birth?" The Nurse looked over at the three people in addition to Spike and Buffy.

"We're all family..."

"That's wonderful.....that's how they did it ages ago...the whole family would gather around. I'll be right back."

"Thank you." Dawn returned to her sister, Buffy clutching to Spike's hand and practicing her breathing, working through the pain of another contraction. She knelt in front and place a hand on her knee."How's it going?" Buffy waited until the wave subsided before even trying to speak.

"I'm okay....really...." Buffy grit out before she whimpered and buried her face in Spike's chest. The vampire had become pure devoted tenderness, stroking her hair and holding her close while whispering cajoling words in her ear.

"Right this way please!" Caroline announced. Spike rose to his feet to push the wheelchair, with Buffy reaching above to grasp his wrist. This was going to be an event.

***

"Take your damn ice chips and choke on them!!!" The Slayer shouted her latest rant at Spike, who despite trying his very best to be supportive and attentive, bore the brunt of his wife's emotional peaks and valleys. The cup of ice narrowly missed his head and caught Giles in the chest. They'd been riding the Buffy In Active Labor rollercoaster for almost an hour now. After nurse Caroline had settled them into the expansive and haute decorated birthing room, Buffy had been examined and told she was only 6 centimeters dilated and it was too soon to deliver. Willow and Dawn were busying themselves with strategically placing crystals and effigies around the room in preparation for the spell Willow had planned. Xander and Giles remained on the sidelines and praying to not incur the Slayer's wrath."Spike!!" Buffy was caught in the throws of another labor pain and he was back at her side in a second, clutching her hand.

"I'm right here, baby," he promised.

"I'm sorry..."

"Shhh....love, doesn't matter....I'm not going anywhere."

"You promise?"

"Of course I promise....what do you need?"

"Just you.....just you......ohhhhhh.....drugs....need drugs....." Moments later the doctor appeared at the door, the most reputed obstetrician in Sunnydale, who also happened to be blue skinned and have two sets of arms. Descended from the Indian god Vishnu, Dr. Beatrice Ravi was in high demand among demons and humans who were having hybrid children. Living on the Hell Mouth, it was becoming a more frequent occurrence.

"Good....well, I guess it's morning now isn't it?" She spoke with a hint of an accent."How is everyone doing?"

"B...Buffy..." Spike stuttered.

"Tell you what Mr. Summers, why doesn't everyone take five minutes and I'll examine your wife...you can leave your coat in the corner and go ask a nurse find you some scrubs to put over your clothes..."

"I'm not leaving!" Dr. Ravi gave him a smile and placed one of her hands on his shoulder.

"You'll only be gone for a few minutes, then we'll probably be able to begin....and I believe your Wiccan friend needs to cast her net?" Willow nodded in affirmation and drew the pillar candles she had in her bag and arranged them ina circle."We'll move all the electronic equipment out aswell so it won't interfere with the spell....you have nothing to worry about. Ms. Rosenberg and I have discussed everything previously."

"The doctor's right, honey, I'll be fine...you'll know if I need you...the walls will shake..." Buffy assured. Dawn came around and took his arm and pulled him away from Buffy and ushered him towards the door.

"Come on big bad...she's not going anywhere," his sister-in-law mused. Xander and Giles took the initiative and helped Dawn in prying Spike away from Buffy. They virtually had to drag him from the room, poor vampire.

Chapter 11 - One Good Day

Coming back to Buffy's room was like passing into another dimension. First things first, the room seemed nothing like a hospital's in the least. The machines and lights were gone, and it was illuminated by only candle light and the magic of the ignited within the crystals . Spike held his hand out, half expecting a barrier, and indeed found one, but one that he was able to pass through. Stepping inside he could feel the air as if it were as thick as water, it smelled of sage, oakmoss and palmarosa. Buffy was sitting upright on the birthing bed with her eyes closed and smile upon her face as she breathed calmly. Dawn and Willow were in the corner where the incense burned and a large matte black bowl of water had a blue flame alight in the center. Colors danced away from the crystals and flittered around the room, taking Giles and Xander by surprise as they came in behind Spike. Dr. Ravi was consulting with a nurse, who had brought in the necessary equipment for when the babies were born, nothing overly complicated or electronic.

Buffy looked over at him and smiled brightly, holding her hand out to him."Spikey!" she giggled, reaching out for him. He took her hand and she pulled him in close,"I love Willow." A wry smile spread across Spike's face, while Xander and Giles stood together staring perplexed at the red head. The young witch smiled back at Buffy and resumed her sustaining of the spell."Your outfit brings out your eyes..."

"The sky blue hospital scrubs?"

"Yup....you're so pretty......but not as pretty as Willow. Willow's my favorite person on the planet.....oh boy do I love Willow...." Spike looked away from his delirious wife and gave their friend a questioning look.

"Did you give her some of your magic weeds?" he asked.

"No...nothing like that....."Willow explained,"It's the net I put over the room....it protects and neutralizes all negativity, anxiety and pain....sort of a cosmic epidural. She'll be a bit loopy until the spell is stable."

"So the labor pains?"

"Are gone....just a sort of pressure so she knows when to push....makes the entire birthing process painless and easy for her and the babies. Four women in my coven have done it this way, kind of a trade secret."

"And that's why I love Willow," Buffy chimed in,"Can we take her home with us?"

"Sure thing, pet," Spike replied, settling next to her on the bed,"You really doing alright?"

"I'm floating in blue dream....oh!!"

"What?!" Dr. Ravi checked out her patient and then addressed the room.

"Everyone who doesn't want the full monty please move to the back of the theater.....we're ready to begin. In other words...other side of her knees please." Giles and Xander both sprinted to the other side of the room.

***

There had always been the warmth and the motion, the pulse of heartbeats and a voice that echoed in his ears and all around him. He didn't know too much beyond the small space he shared with his twin, a smaller, more delicate being than himself. He knew that he loved her and loved their world; he also loved the voice and it's melodic tones. Most of the time there was a third presence, always outside, on the peripheral. They four of them were all connected, their bond was strong....and now his world was in chaos. He was frightened, he was being forced to leave his nest; then he was cold and there was too much noise...and he was without his sister.

"Buffy....we have a son! I have a son..." Spike spoke in astonishment as the crying baby boy was laid on his mother's chest. He was wet and covered in the residue from the womb and his birth, and shaking with the shock of coming into the other world. Many hands were upon his body and he was confused, but then there was something warm pressed the top of his head and he heard the voice again in it's startling clarity, his mother's voice.

"Spike....look at him..." Buffy said through a deluge of tears and kisses to him,"Our little boy....he's so beautiful....." The baby had stopped crying and clung to her warmth, he felt safe....but only for a moment, and then he was taken away."Go with him...." Spike let go of his wife's hand and followed the nurse over to the table where she was tending to his son. The new father caressed the baby's head and brushed feather light kisses upon his brow. The baby made a face as his cries receded that Spike could have sworn was the patented Buffy Summers pout. The baby was wrapped tightly in blankets and given a ridiculous blue toque, but Spike didn't pay it any mind. The nurse handed the vampire the living, breathing child that was half his and half Buffy's and he did not care that the room was full of people, he wept at the joy of his son's mere existence. Dawn had come over and had touched his arm, he looked up from the baby to her bright adoring smile. If it wasn't for this girl, his children couldn't have ever been conceived, she was part of the baby too.

"Dawn..." he said, abandoning every one of her nicknames,"Thank you for my son." She smiled even broader if it was possible, then placed her hand on his back and encouraged him to go back to Buffy's side. For the time Spike had inadvertently forgotten his wife and her situation. She was taking a rest, even with Willow's help, the birthing of the first baby had been laborious and draining. Dr. Ravi was attending to her still in preparation for the second child to arrive. The Slayer looked anything but mighty at this moment. By the light of the candles he could see her drenched in sweat and breathing heavily, eyes closed and hands lazily pushing hair off her face. Spike stood facing her and reached out to catch her face in his hand. She looked dreamily at him and smiled the thinnest of smiles.

"I'm tired..." she whispered, laying her head into his palm. He sat down and moved until their torsos were almost touching, their son cradled between them.

"But look, love..." Instead she cringed and moaned, trying to roll on her side.

"It's starting again," Dr. Ravin informed,"She still has a long way to go..."

"I can hold him," Dawn offered, holding her arms out for William. Spike reluctantly gave him up and lay his son in his aunt's arms, watching her disappear into the shadows.

"Spike..." Buffy breathed out, reaching for him. He was back with her moments later, his arm around her back and under arm, their other hands joined. She was panting, trying to stay focused. There was little pain, but the reality of moving something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a lemon for a second time was not playing well with the Slayer."This is all your fault you know....you had to ask for twins, didn't you?"

"Sweetness, you're working miracles tonight...just a little further and it'll all be over....and we'll have our girl with us too...you can do it, love." She sat herself up and put her legs back in position, squeezing Spike's hand.

"I know I can do it!"

to be continued.....

Chapter 12 - Question of Love

Spike was sacked out in the chair next to her bed, his arms were folded her his lap and his legs stretched out in front of him. His head was hung over the back the chair and despite the fact that he didn't really need to breathe he was snoring. Somewhere along the way that part of his autonomic nervous system had picked up again. In truth Buffy thought he looked adorable. Especially with the brand new chenille blanket Giles had gone and bought her was spread over his chest. Buffy lingered upon the sight of him, not half jealous that he was the one who had managed to grab a nap and she was not. She didn't mind in the least though, because she was the captive audience to the most amazing phenomenon she'd ever known. The front of her hospital gown had been pulled away and Allegra was being nourished at her breast. The nurse had come two hours previously and taught her how to begin. William had already had his first meal from her and though it was foreign and uncomfortable at first, both mother and child had taken to it naturally. Now on the second breast, her second child took her milk. She wondered if her mother had been so hypnotized by the motions and sensation of having small, precious being so close and so alive.

William was laying in one of those hospital bassinets, well within arm's reach. He was sleeping, swaddled in a hospital blanket with a blue toque over his head. She reached out and lay a hand upon his chest, blinking back tears. He stirred and opened his mouth, then closed it again when Buffy ran her finger over his cheek. She was a mother, and the fact of that was so overwhelming she hardly knew how to take it all in. She was a Slayer, she had already died twice; Sunnydale was a dangerous and unpredictable place to live; she was a target because of both factors; but she was happier than she'd ever been because of the three people in the room with her now.

"Buffy?" Spike muttered as he roused himself from sleep, his eyes adjusting to the fluorescent lights overhead in combination with the open curtains and sunlight at the far side of the room.

"We're right here," Buffy replied quietly, Spike sat up and noted the warm blanket over him,"Giles brought it...I asked the nurse to put it over you."

"I don't really get cold though, love....I'm room temperature 100% of the time....." It was then that he noticed what was happening before his eyes,"Buffy....."

"Come see." He stood up and approached cautiously, as if he was worried he'd disrupt them. He stood over the scene of Buffy nursing their daughter with the same look of awe upon his face as when he'd seen her atop the stairs after her resurrection. He hugged his arms around himself and smiled in purest bliss.

"She's lovely...isn't she?"

"The most beautiful thing I've ever seen....why don't you pick up William? He's already had his..."

"Um...right...I....."

"Spike, he's your son....hold your son." The vampire gathered up his courage and walked around to where the baby boy lay. Spike was reluctant to take hold of him, but when William opened his large blue eyes and looked in Spike's direction, all apprehension was dissipated from the new father. His hand slipped under William's head and the other under his back, then drew the baby up. Spike held the baby out from his body, taking in the wonder of the new life. Sitting on the foot of the bed, Spike cradled his son in his arms, utterly enthralled by the small person before him. The baby squirmed, but was restricted by the blanket tucked around him. Equally as displeased by the fact, Spike loosened the swaddling, letting the boy's arms and legs be free. It was then that Spike experience his first of no doubt many perfect moments to come. William reached towards his father and Spike brought him close so he could kiss his impossibly tiny fingertips.

"Buffy...why do you love me?"

"That's a funny question."

"But I'm askin'."

"Oh I don't know....I mean, I know...there's all kinds of reasons."

"Tell me....tell me why." The strange manner in his asking irked Buffy in a way she couldn't quite understand. At that moment Allegra came away from her breast accidentally and mewled and fought the confine of her blanket in protest. Ignoring Spike momentarily she did the same as he had for William and unwrapped her from the blanket. She seemed to appreciate the free range of motion and with Buffy's help affixed herself back at the breast.

"I think they're already like you...don't like to told they have to have things a certain way. I love that about you, you don't accept a situation until you've changed it to suit you, or me...that's very strong. I love you because you're fierce and powerful, you're also gentle and sensitive. I love your blindly passionate poet and I love your violent, possessive demon......I just love you, Spike."

"I don't understand....I feel it, but I don't understand it. How can this possibly all be mine? Surely I don't deserve....you....them....without having a soul? What sort of father can I possibly be?"

"A soul? You've never said anything about wanting a soul. What's a soul anyways? Whatever's in you now is more than I'll ever need."

"But, love, what's going to happen when they look in my eyes and see it's not there? What if they think I'm a monster?" He brought William closer against him and the baby curled up into Spike's chest and began to fall back asleep,"M' sorry, Buffy...just ignore me....stupid bloody self pity....forget I said anything..." Allegra was done with her feeding and Buffy once again took her attention away from Spike to fix her gown and reposition Allegra in her lap. Spike's moved closer and lay his hand upon his daughter, she was so small he nearly covered her."She's warm......"

"Full tummy.....Spike, let me ask you something now? If anyone, anything tried to hurt William or Allegra, what would you do?" His face contorted with the thought and then darkened with the instincts her question was waking.

"I tear them limb from limb....make them suffer..."

"And what would you do if....when....they get sick....or break a bone or something?" Now he looked lost, almost shocked.

"I...I don't know....I....scared, terrified..."

"Now, what about when they'll smile at you, recognize you? When they're older and they wrap their little arms around you and squeeze so tight you can't stand it?" Tears were welling in his eyes and he looked down at the blankets covering Buffy's legs.

"Full....alive...loved..."

"Those are why I love you. So, maybe having a soul would change you in the way you think you need....but the three souls in this room are already your's, they belong to you...and they love you completely."

"You're very wise, sweetness."

"I know.......I'm also very pretty.....and I'm exhausted...think you can watch over them?" Already she was laying the now sleeping Allegra in his other arm. She lay back and looked him holding their children, it was the most love she'd ever felt in a single moment.

"Sleep, love...I'll watch over them...always."

to be continued.....

Chapter 13 - Snapshots

"Nibblet, please, no more," Spike asked, a twinge of frustration tainting his request,"You'll burn their retinas or something."

"They're asleep, Spike," Dawn replied, taking another photograph of him sitting on the couch in their living room, a baby cradled in each are. Buffy was laughing in his ear and giving the lobe a chew. She had her arms around his neck, while he leaned back against her,"Besides there's nothing sexier than a man with babies....right Buffy?"

"In total agreement here," Buffy replied, hugging Spike and pressing a sloppy wet kiss to his temple,"But you're sexy when you're covered in demon guts." They'd been home from the hospital for one week and so far it was smooth sailing. In a manner of speaking. Buffy had been dubbed "the Milk Machine" and Spike was "the Waking Dead", both nicknames coined by Dawn. Buffy spent the majority of her time with a baby latched to her boob, as Spike had so tactfully worded it, while he barely slept. If one of the twins needed anything besides a feeding, he attended to it.

Officially, Spike had ordained himself to be on paternity leave, letting a very capable Xander and an enthused Giles take over on patrol. No mention of Olivia had even been made, and Giles was by all accounts a contented man back in Sunnydale, afterall he was for all intents and purposes the only grandparent to William and Allegra. Buffy decided Spike had been right, the twins gave him perspective, that for as each death came, so did a new life began.

The minor issue of Hank Summers had raised itself and been put to rest all in the same day. The day the twins were born Dawn had excitedly called his office in Los Angelos to tell him they had arrived. Her father had know his eldest daughter had married and was expecting, his secretary assured Dawn he'd been informed. When a bouquet of lilies arrived at the house, with a card and the word Congratulations printed on it like probably a hundred others that were delivered that day. Buffy asked Dawn to put them in the trash, then proceeded to make Giles hold William when Allegra was fussing and needed her mother's full attention.

So now, as the first week of adjusting to the dramatic change in the family's dynamic flowed into the second week, Dawn was still taking roll after roll of family pictures. There was a stack of 12 developed sets from hospital to home and everything in between and after."Besides," Dawn continued,"We don't have enough pictures of you Spike...only like 2 or 3 from the past year."

"So now you've got 500 of me looking tired and over wrought? Thanks ever so, lil' bit."

"Stop complaining....and say cheese."

***

"What's that tune?" Buffy asked, watching Spike standing at their bedroom window under the gloam of the moonlight. He held Allegra close to him, dotting her wisps of blond hair with kisses. He swayed to the music of his own making, it was a ballad of some sort, but she'd never heard it before in her life. She sat upright in the bed, whilst William sucked greedily at the breast he'd claimed as his.

"What? Oh um...it's an aria, but a very very old one, medieval. Funny how memories come back when you least expect it. Allegra, my grandmother used to sing it, it was her favorite. I'd forgotten all about until this moment. The words are in archaic old English...I have wist, sin I couthe meen...that children hath by candle light....her shadewe on the wal iseen...and ronne therafter all the night. Bisy aboute they han ben to catchen it with all here might. And whom they catchen it best wolde wene...sannest it shet out of her sight....the shadewe catchen they ne might...for no lines that they couthe lay. This shadewe I may likne aright to this world and yesterday."

"Sounds lovely...do you know what it means?"

"Ever since I could remember....I have known, that children, by candle light....have seen a shadow on the wall and have chased it all night through. Busily they have tried, with all their might, to catch it. And when they most expect to catch it....it shoots most quickly out of sight. This shadow never shall be caught...in any trap they lay...this shadow in the likeness of this world and yesterday."

"You never cease to amaze me, you know that? You have many layers...."

"'Cause I remember a bit of poetry?" He chuckled softly and returned Allegra to her bassinet at the foot of their bed now that she'd fallen asleep. He slipped back in between the covers and relaxed, laying his head upon Buffy's shoulder to behold the wonder before him.

"No, baby, because have the same look in your eyes when you remember your grandmother and your childhood as you do when you talk about a good kill. The world fascinates, amuses and enthralls you and I like seeing it through you...just like I want to through our children."

"Doesn't feel that weird? He looks like he's gonna suck it right off."

"Well, you would know."

"Buffy!"

"Oh be fair about this.....first, you're a vampire....the sucking gene is firmly embedded. Secondly, you seem to have this fixation with my breasts long before I ever got pregnant. I remember ever since the beginning......"

"Well, they're very nice, aren't they? But that's not what I meant...I think I just have a hard time reconciling it all. I live, I feel, I hurt, I love.....but I'm dead, this body is just a reanimated corpse when you get right down to it. And here you are feeding your children from the same body in which you made them...there's a cycle of life happening all around me. I guess I just don't know where I fit in.....I still feel dead sometimes. The three of you, you're all vital, living, with blood flowing and bodies changing and growing....and I don't. I don't belong..." Tears dropped on to William's cheek and Spike subconsciously wiped them away with the pad of his thumb before realizing he'd made his wife cry. He pulled away from them and clenched his fists tight,"Damn.....Buffy....I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry....I know I can be a stupid insensitive git..."

"It hurts me when you talk like that..."

"Maybe I should just go for a walk then...."

"Spike....will you take William? He's done..." She held the baby out for his father and waited for him to be taken. There was a stagnancy to Spike's thought process in that moment, he was torn between his addled mind and his instincts. In the end his heart won out, much to Buffy's relief. Spike lay his son upright on his chest and rubbed his back. There was something very beautiful about a baby in only a cloth diaper nestled against his father's bare chest, a sort of purity."Now that I know you're not going to run away, I have something important to tell you....and I want you to really listen to me. From September to May of last year I felt dead, well and truly dead...the only time I ever didn't want to go find another tower to jump off was when I was with you. The only thing that kept me in this world was the fact that if I died I wouldn't have you. This was all totally subconscious at the time...but after you left and came back, I knew it all was for real. I love you.....and yeah, without Dawn I never would have been able to get pregnant by you, but William and Allegra are completely yours, Spike. They were made from you as much as me. Look at this little boy your holding....looks at his little sister...without you they wouldn't exist. Without you, I'd be dead again...so, if you really can't see where you fit in, you're a fool. None of this would have been possible without you. If you believe it'll take a soul for you to believe it, then we'll find a way for you to get it back......there's gotta be some way that isn't a curse. But if that never happens can you promise me that you'll just accept things as they are?" Spike sighed and busied himself in dressing William in his sleeper and laying him in his own bassinet, next to Allegra's. He waited a moment, trying to decided if he should go for a walk after all. But Buffy had laid herself out naked under the covers and was waiting expectantly. He resigned himself to accepting that this was where he belonged, however much he didn't feel he deserved it. True happiness really was the most terrifying thing on earth.

He slipped in between the covers and Buffy drew him into her arms. His head nestled between the warm pillows of her breasts as she wound her arm around his shoulders, and wove their legs together. He hugged urgently at her waist, already close to how it was before she'd even been pregnant, she was almost back in fighting form. Something to be said for Slayer healing and metabolism. She kissed the top of his head and caressed her face with the curls of his hair,"My poor, sweet, vampire.....for all your bravado, you're just a scared little boy aren't you?" she whispered, he only held on tighter,"But don't be afraid....I'm gonna take good care of all of us."

***

"Love to eat them babies, them babies what I love to eat. Bite they tiny heads off, nibble on they tiny feet...." Spike sang in a fiendishly cute way before descending upon the undersides of William and Allegra's feet with mad, playful kisses. Buffy had to restrain herself from bursting out laughing at the sight of Spike sitting crossed legged on the bed with the twins laid out in front of him after their bath. The children certainly seemed to love this new game, judging by their constant movement and focused attention upon their vampire father in his full demon face.

"They seem to like you with the lumpies..." said Buffy as she rummaged through the laundry basket for outfits for the children.

"Figured it would be best to get them used to it...it's gonna be a part of their lives......unfortunately."

"Not unfortunately....they'll probably think it's cool. I happen to think it's a very handsome face."

"Yeah, well, you're out of your bloody mind."

"No kidding. I married you, didn't I?"

"Very funny." She came over to the bed and went to pick up Allegra when she noticed something she hadn't before.

"Huh.."

"What?"

"Do something for me? Lay down, put your feet out."

"Alriiiight...." He did as she asked, while she positioned a twin on either side of him, putting all their feet in line at the end of the bed.

"Hold still...."

"Pet, what on Earth are you doing?" She darted out of room and Spike looked down the length of his body to two babies at his feet,"Your mum's nuts." Buffy came rushing back and knelt in front of their feet with Dawn's camera and snapped a photograph.

"I just noticed......you all have the same feet...all three of you...."

"Really?"

"Little feet just like daddy's." Buffy saw that smile on her husband's face, he was proud.

to be continued.....

Chapter 14 - The Restless Warriors

"That's mommy's good boy...." Buffy cooed as she kissed William's round tummy after changing him into a fresh diaper. The boy stared at her in wonderment as her fingers and lips played over his sensitive skin. He and Allegra both were gaining weight and their features had begun to fill out. They were getting stronger too, very strong in fact, signs of both Slayer and vampire qualities were showing themselves.

"Mummy's good boy is home!" Spike announced as he swooped into the nursery, returning from his first night of patrol since the birth. He picked Allegra up from the changing table cuddled her close while Buffy finished dressing William,"No, you're mommy's bad boy. Have fun?"

"I did indeed....escorted Dawn to Janice's for their sleepover, split up with Harris and let him take the north side of town...by the by, four vampires and a Fyarl congratulated me on becoming a father...right before I killed them...I think it was a ploy for mercy...felt kinda nice though, to hear the words."

"You're very strange."

"I know, pet, but I'm a good man and you love me."

"That I do. Everyone is fed, clean and ready to go back to bed. I think we've got a routine, finally."

"Sweetness, it's been three weeks....they're not ready to keep to a routine...mark my words, an hour from now someone will be screamin' for a snack, or a cuddle...."

"Yeah, it'll probably be you."

"Maybe...but you're very obliging."

"Speaking of which....next week...I'd like us to....um...."

"Yes?" She chewed nervously on her bottom lip and continued to do so as she took William in her arms and led them all back to the bedroom. She lay William down, then took Allegra from her father and lay her down too, both of them already drifting off to sleep. Meanwhile Spike changed out of his clothes and slipped into the jogging pants he often slept in. They settled into bed and lay together in the darkness,"There's something you want to tell me..."

"We're very happy, aren't we?"

"Absolutely..."

"Loving and taking care of William and Allegra is effortless....it's amazing."

"Buffy, it's beyond my wildest dreams."

"However, I think maybe it's time we remembered that we're not just parents...we're lovers too."

"Oh!"

"Forget that, huh?"

"No....it's just that the books said it'd be at least six weeks....it's only been three..."

"But I'm a Slayer....and I bounce back pretty fast....and don't tell me you're not gettin'....an itch...." Her fingertips danced around his nipples and her lips brushed over the skin of his shoulder.

"Buffy.....I was certain this would be the last thing on your mind...."

"It's not the first....the first is taking good care of my babies and making sure they're loved completely.....however, my libido did not disappear just because I've given birth....it's just altered....no acrobatics for while.....just slow, tender, us reconnecting..."

"When you're ready then, sweetness. I won't deny it, I can't wait to be with you again...but I will wait."

"But I'm telling you I don't think we have to wait....maybe a week or two...besides....there's other things I can do for you..." She moved over until she was draped across half his body, pressing her lips to the muscles of his chest.

"Bloody hell.....love, don't get me all worked up.....I've been behaving myself...now, you're being very tempting..." She stopped kissing him and held him instead.

"Just reminding you that this body of mine isn't just made for feeding and nurturing your children."

"My precious....I never forgot that...you're all those things and more.....you're everything. When we come together again....it'll be you n' me....not just me layin' here gettin' my cookies frosted.....we're going to make love."

***

Buffy awoke with a bit of a start, the disturbing dream still pumping through her veins under the power of her fast pounding heat. Spike had awoken too and reach out next to him to lay a hand on her."You alright, love?" he asked sleepily.

"Yeah.....just a nightmare." He shifted to move close enough to hold her.

"What kind of nightmare?"

"The twins were crying and I couldn't find them....other stuff too.....but they needed me and I couldn't find them."

"Shhh...it's fine, pet, only natural that you should fret....just have to adjust to it all still. It's only been three weeks."

"Yeah, I know but.....hey, it's morning...." Spike looked back over his shoulder and sure enough sunlight danced under the billowing curtains."I don't remember waking up again after I fed William last...did they sleep through the night? Why's the window open? It's too cold out for the window to be open." They looked at each other for a moment, then simultaneous got up and moved quickly towards the pair of bassinets at the foot of the bed. Buffy fell into a fit of convulsions where as Spike was frozen - William and Allegra had vanished.

to be continued.....

Chapter 15 - Cold and Broken Hallelujah

She was beyond her endurance point as she ran towards home. Dawn and Janice had been eating breakfast when the younger Summers girl was suddenly overwhelmed with images of heavenly creatures with wings splattered with blood. She heard inside her head the sound of babies crying and she knew well whose babies those were. She'd bolted from the table like a spooked horse and started to run home. Where she approached the house, her worse fears were confirmed. All the windows and doors were missing and the frames were shimmering by virtue of a residue left when the intruders had passed through. Dawn headed straight for the master bedroom, but stopped short when she heard the sound of someone throwing up. She then entered the room carefully, Spike stood facing the beds in which is son and daughter slept, clutching their blankets to his chest, but as petrified as a statue. She walked behind him and saw the bassinets were empty, she also saw the tattoo she'd marked his back with was gone. Buffy could be heard retching violently in the bathroom again and Dawn proceeded.

She knelt down beside her sister and pulled Buffy's hair back from her face. The young mother was now shaking from the dry heaving and Dawn tentatively placed a hand on her bare back, rubbing gently."I'm so sorry, Buffy," she whispered as she too began to cry. Giles, Xander and Willow appeared at the bedroom door.

"Spike?" Giles questioned,"Is something wrong....I woke up and felt, wrong....what is it?" The vampire looked in the direction from where the voice had come, tears streaming down his face.

"My children, Rupert, they've taken my children...." he choked out.

"Who?! What's going on?!"

"Angels...." Dawn began to explained as she emerged with Buffy, clutching her robe around her, from the bathroom,"There must have been dozens of them.....for no one to have woken up....they need the powers of many. I wasn't here, so they could take the marks off Spike and Buffy....and........and.......take William and Allegra."

"Why would they do this?"

"I don't know......" Spike let go of the baby blankets and stalked into the bathroom, less than a minute later he emerged fully clothed. Ignoring them all, including Buffy, he cut a path to leave, however his wife caught him.

"Spike?" she pleaded. He looked at her, he was wounded and ashamed.

"Need answers," he breathed out.

"What are you going to do?"

"Get them." Without a second word he left his wife and charged downstairs, tossing on his boots and duster and running out of the house and down the closest manhole. Meanwhile, Buffy sagged against her sister and all rushed to her aid. They lead her back to the bed and sat her down. She was shivering and for a moment Dawn took on a green luminescence, restoring the doors and windows to the house.

"Don't worry, we'll get them back," said Dawn.

"I'll go straight away to the Magic Box and see what I can find in the books," Giles assured them.

"I'll scry and track down their location," seconded Willow, picking up the baby blankets Spike had let fall,"Shouldn't be too hard."

"I'll go after Spike," Xander volunteered,"Help him...."

"Keep him safe, Xander," Buffy begged,"Make sure he's okay, .he won't be thinking, he'll do something stupid!"

"I'll take care of your husband, Buffy...promise."

When Dawn and Buffy were alone again, Dawn found herself being the strong one of the pair. She stroked Buffy's hair and held her hand. They Slayer's body still operated of its own volition, shaking terribly.

"Xuxael," Buffy whispered.

"No, Buffy, Xuxael's dead."

"No....I know.....Xuxael was so twisted, so ugly and violent. If angels like him have my babies, I can only imagine...."

"I know you can't help it....but don't think about it, just focus on getting them back."

"They must be so scared, they don't have me or Spike.....and cold.....they didn't take their blankets. Oh god.....I fed them hours ago....Dawn, they're hungry, they need me to nurse them. I can feel them, crying for me and I can't find them.......just like the dream...."

"When did you have a dream?"

"Last Night."

"Tell me about what you saw, it could be important..."

"There were angels, thousands of them and they were on a battlefield. It was gruesome, so much blood.....rivers of blood. They had swords and spears, old weapons. Heads and wings were being cut off, some were impaled on giant stakes. I've never seen such gore and violence......William and Allegra are in the middle of it!" Buffy crumbled into her sister, overcome with sorrow.

***

Spike pulled himself out of the sewers and into the back room at Willy's bar. He waited a moment to compose himself before he went into confront the owner and his patrons. Halfway between home and the demon bar he'd had a breakdown, screaming and crying his heart out alone in the sewers of Sunnydale. The echoes still rang in his ears. He'd also throttled the wall with his fist and now his knuckles were demolished and bloody. Pain on his body was easier to focus on than the pain inside. When he thought of William and Allegra, to his mind the two most perfect beings in creation, he felt such extreme emotions he couldn't contain them. His cold dead body had been an integral part of a miracle, he'd made babies with the woman he loved. The vampires and Slayer throughout all history had been given a balance like never before.

He craved the touch of their soft skin against his cheek, the newborn scent and their radiating warmth that made him feel alive again. He wondered how much more pain he could be in if he only had a soul. It must be so much worse for Buffy, he reasoned. He knew he shouldn't have walked out as he had, leaving her alone with empty bassinets and baby blankets that smelled so fragrantly of the twins. But inaction would have driven him insane. Not to mention that being in his wife's presence right now would be more than he could possibly handle. He wished he could take her in his arms and make her believe that everything would work itself out. He knew it would be a lie. Everything inside the vampire was being stretched taut as if over a medieval torture device. One more turn and he would snap.

Chapter 16 - The Pitch and the Battle

Spike kicked in the backdoor of the bar and the few patrons that were left over from the night before jumped as he stormed in with the demon's face raw and menacing. Even at this time in the morning Willy's was occupied, it was practically a 24 hour establishment. Two Laert demons started to make for the exit and Spike rushed them, throwing one back across the room and crashing it into a table, the other ran back to the booth.

"Hey, hey......woah man," Willy protested, holding his hands up in peace,"What's the deal?!" Spike snarled and grabbed Willy by his collar and hauled him over the bar.

"You know I got the chip outta my skull.....don't you lie to me or I'll break a bone for every false word that comes outta your bloody mouth."

"I got it! I got it!"

"What happened at my house last night?!"

"Huh?"

"WHAT HAPPENED!!!!?"

"Okay, okay, okay.......Some vamps came in about 3am sayin' there were all kinds of lights over the Slayer's house and that nobody could get close enough to check it out...like a forcefield or something. That's all I know, Spike, I swear it! You know I never leave the joint...." There was a tap upon Spike's shoulder and the vampire dropped the human to the ground. He spun around and came face to face with a timid looking and small sized demon that for a moment reminded Spike of Clem. The demon flinched at the sight of the vampire's rage.

"I....I......don't throw me into a wall or anything, but I thought maybe.....I know that you and the Slayer are....are together and you've been doing rounds for her...."

"Get to the bloody point!"

"There's been rumors lately....there aren't many demons left on the Hell Mouth, just lotsa vampire fledgelings. They're all skippin' town..."

"What does this have to do with last night?"

"I don't know.....just thought maybe you should know, 'cause I didn't think you would, being as you're fighting on the other side. There's gonna be a party. Demons from all over the world are going."

"Where is it then, what kind of party?"

"Like doomsday kind, don't know where. To the east. I'm just trying to help." Spike turned back to Willy, how was just picking himself up off the floor.

"You hear anything more I wanna know about it!"

"No problem.....what went down?"

"None of your bloody business!" Spike headed back in the direction he came, reaching over the bar to snatch a bottle of whiskey as he passed.

***

Spike hadn't gotten so drunk off his ass since before he'd journeyed to Africa....there hadn't been a need to drown his sorrows. There hadn't been any sorrows, only love and happiness with his family. That had all been shattered into as many shards as the empty bottle of whiskey he's smashed against a grave stone. He'd spent the morning wandering aimlessly and drinking in the sewer tunnels, and the afternoon in other demon establishments. Once the sun had set, he'd gone above ground to try to find anyone who knew anything, as well as shaken down a few vamp nests for more information before staking them all. He was in the vicinity of his old crypt as he stumbled between tombstones. He couldn't wake himself from the nightmare that was his life. He also knew getting drunk had been a bad idea, he couldn't go home like this, it would only hurt Buffy. She didn't need a drunken louse for a husband right now. She needed answers and needed him to be confidant and supportive. He wasn't that man, instead he was a terrified and lost shell of who he'd been only yesterday.

He leaned back against a tree and began to weep. Then off to one side he heard laughter, sinister and mocking."Lucifer...." Spike seethed. The dark angel leapt dramatically from the shrubbery with a huge smile on his face and arms spread wide.

"Oh I feel the love tonight.....you remember me!"

"Shoulda known you wouldn't be far behind."

"How are the wife n' kids, Spikey?" Spike launched himself at Lucifer and grabbed him by the throat and slammed him against the tree. The angel pushed him off and Spike fell back on his ass.

"Well, that's gratitude for yah. Guess I should have brought and actual olive branch. Gimme a sec, I'll duck behind the bushes and take off my jockeys and wave 'em around on a stick. I come in peace....duuuuuude." He flashed Spike a peach sign and continued with his saccharin grin. The vampire stayed motionless, beyond irritated and imagining pulling the fallen angel's heart from his chest. Without warning Spike was hauled up on to his feet by the two persons on either side of home. Spike looked at the pair, who were obviously demons and took a step back from them. There was something about them that made the vampire nervous.

Each demon was a good head taller than Spike, with skin the color of diluted milk, faces gaunt and tragic with eyes that were completely black and reflecting nothing. They wore black fedoras atop their bald heads and heavy woolen overcoats that were trimmed with fur and touched the ground.

"My two best men, Spike. These are Mr. Pitch and Mr. Battle." The almost twins licked their lips lavaciously and raked their eyes over Spike's body, it was the first time since the early days with Angelus that he felt an aura of sexual perversion around him. One of them extended his long fingered had to touch Spike and the vampire reflexively hit it away.

"Hands to yourself, wanker!" Lucifer waved them off and the pair bowed in an effete manner, then skulked into the background.

"Spike, I'm genuinely all cut up about your missing little ones.....you got a raw deal."

"I'm sure you are, Lucifer. About as sorry as you are about terrorist bombs going off in churches." Lucifer chuckled a sound like barnacles tearing a diver's skin.

"That's what I always loved about you Spike! You have no facade - heart on your sleeve and acid wit on the tip of that tongue."

"Get to your bloody point......I have to find my...."

"Find your children? You'll never find them on your own....you're dealing with angels, they're a few notches above regular demons like yourself. First and foremost, I am a business man - I don't know where you kids are.....but Misters Pitch and Battle here could probably find them."

"I don't want Tweedle-fucked and Tweedle-even more fucked anywhere hear my children!"

"I'm not suggesting they're your Mary Poppins."

"Forget it!"

"Let's not be hasty. I'll sweeten the pot. In addition to the services of the two best trackers in the biz....I'll restore your soul. No strings or clauses attached, all your's, William the Bloody Awful Poet back in there with Spikey all mixed up into a spankin' new fresh boy. Does the Slayer enjoy a good spanking? Bet she does with a rump like that....like a ripe tomato! Soul? Souuuuul? Hmmmmmm?" Spike was struck silent by the possibility.....his soul. It was everything he believed he needed to assure Buffy's happiness.

"My...my soul? You can really do that? My own soul? Mine again and no one can ever take it away?"

"Sure! I'm the one who took it from you in the first place." Lucifer leaned in and gave Spike's shoulder a firm squeeze,"What do you say, William? Wanna make a deal with the devil?"

to be continued.....