Spike unlocked the door to their room and lead the way inside, laughing at something which Buffy had said on the way up. They had both had a fabulous time at dinner with the rest of the group, but had eventually gladly excused themselves and retired to their room.

Spike threw himself down on his self-proclaimed ‘normal’ position on the bed whilst Buffy took a seat on the stool in front of the vanity table.

“I am so sorry about Great Aunt Mabel,” Spike said laughingly. “She must have been up to her old tricks again. She never remembers anyone’s names, so she always tries to find out who the other people she’s staying with are from the hotel staff. Sometimes they decide that it’s ‘confidential’ but she always manages to wheedle the information out of them - some old lady trick I guess.”

Buffy laughed, having no problem with seeing the funny side of that evening’s events. “Ah, well - that’d explain it then. Anyway, you have to admit - it was hilarious the way, no matter how many times you told her otherwise, she wouldn’t stop harassing you about the fact that you’d run off and gotten married without inviting her to the wedding - she just wasn’t having any of the truth, was she?”

Spike scowled. “Yeah, right - totally hilarious. She’s gonna be all on my case about that all weekend; you know that, don’t you? Just my luck - a cross old woman forever going on at me for something I haven’t even done! And on my birthday too. Aren’t I the lucky one?” he asked sarcastically.

“Oh, come on Spike,” Buffy teased with a wide grin. “You must be able to see the funny side of it - what with her deciding that she didn’t know me well enough to call me Buffy and insisting on referring to me as ‘Mrs Giles’ all night! I swear, the number of times your mom looked up to see who was speaking to her…” Buffy trailed off in a fit of giggles.

Spike’s scowl quickly faded at the memory, to be replaced by a genuine smile. “Have to admit, luv - you coped with it very well.”

Buffy shrugged, her eyes twinkling. “Well, I came to the conclusion that if she wasn’t going to believe you after the fifth time of you explaining the mistake, she just wasn’t going to get it. Personally, I just think she decided that ‘Buffy’ was a silly name and she wasn’t going to use it.”

“Possibly,” Spike admitted, before pausing and smiling an evil grin. “And it is a silly name,” he taunted light-heartedly.

“Oh, we’re so not going to get into this again, are we?” she asked, referring back to one of their oldest ‘arguments’.

Buffy turned to the mirror and started to unpin her hair as she kicked off her shoes and stretched her feet out. She looked at Spike’s reflection in the mirror, smiling to herself at the way the soft lighting of the room highlighted his sharp cheekbones.

“You have a nice family,” she commented.

“Thanks,” Spike said, turning over the lie on his back, and spreading out to take up as much of the bed as humanly possible. “But, you should know, they were on their best behaviour tonight.”

“Even Great Aunt Mabel?” Buffy asked with a laugh as she shook her hair loose and picked up a cotton wool bud to start removing her makeup.

“Especially Great Aunt Mabel!”

“Why’s that then?” she asked curiously, pausing at the end of one sweep across a cheekbone.

“Well, one - cos it’s my birthday. But mostly cos you’re here.”

“Me?” Buffy asked, intrigued and slightly flattered by the fact.

“Yeah - they’re always good around new people - don’t worry though, it’ll go steadily down hill tomorrow night. For example, Uncle Arthur’ll have too much to drink so Karen - she’s his second wife, they only married last year - will start surreptitiously trying to water down his drinks. But he’s wise to her game - has been since she started playing it - and he’ll surreptitiously start ordering doubles. It’s always good for a laugh.”

“Then, I guess I just can’t wait for tomorrow night,” Buffy said with a smile, trying to stifle a yawn.

“Tired?” Spike asked sympathetically as he realised how tired he was.

”A little - it’s been a long day - the drive was hell. Guess we should go to bed. I’ll just be a minute,” she said, picking up her pyjamas and walking into the bathroom.

Spike quickly changed, throwing on a t-shirt and a fresh pair of boxers. Sleep-wear wasn’t really his forte, but he knew that it would be mandatory that weekend.

Buffy emerged minutes later from the bathroom, clad in a pair of cover-all pyjamas. She hovered by the bathroom door, seemingly nervous about entering the main room.

“I meant what I said earlier,” Spike said, breaking the slightly uncomfortable silence. “I don’t mind sleeping on the floor.” Spike tried to ignore the little voice in the back of his head informing him that he was mad to even contemplate giving up a night in a soft bed with the woman standing in front of him.

But he needed have worried; the repeated offer seemed to start Buffy out of her nervous contemplation and towards the bed.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Spike,” she said with a small smile as they each climbed into their own side of the bed. Spike reached over and switched off the light, plunging the room into totally darkness.

For a minute or two they lay there, side by side, the only sound in the room their breathing.

“Buffy?” Spike asked quietly.

“Yes?” Buffy answered, almost nervously.

“Can I ask you a question,” Spike said, sounding quite tentative.

“Of course,” Buffy responded, wondering what kind of question he wanted to ask whilst they were lying so close together in bed, in a darkened room.

“Are those your yummi sushi pyjamas?”

“Yes,” she said, slightly thrown by the question.

“They’re actually quite sexy,” he said with a chuckle before rolling onto his side to go to sleep.

Buffy laughed quietly as she lay there, staring up towards the ceiling, her mind thrown back to that phone conversation which seemed to have taken place a lifetime ago, before everything got so complicated, before everything seemed to have gone wrong. She lay silently, not moving as Spike’s breathing softly grew regular and she realised that he’d fallen asleep.

She was convinced sleep wouldn’t come as easily to her that night, lying as she was next to the man she…

Buffy paused in her thoughts for a moment, trying to cut off the direction they were swiftly going in. Trying, as she had for so many months, to ignore and repress her feelings. She quietly slipped out of bed and walked to the window, peering out through the heavy curtains at the lawn and the way the bright moonlight dappled through the surrounding trees to fall in weird and complicated patterns on the grass.

She shook her head and silently sighed, realising that it was no use. She couldn’t deny it anymore, couldn’t write it off as a mere fancy. She had to admit it - to herself at least. She loved Spike; there was no point in denying it. Her feelings in this weren’t going to go away, it wasn’t something that would disappear if she ignored it for long enough.

But the admittance didn’t make her happy. It didn’t solve the conflict of emotions that never seemed to let up when she was around him.

*God,* she thought to herself. *How the hell do I get myself into these situations? Why is it that it took me until he started dating other women to realise how I felt? And now it’s probably too late to tell him? I mean, after what I did to him, he’d have to be crazy to even contemplate being interested in me.* She shook her head and smiled sadly, wondering what she should do.

After what seemed like an eternity of staring out at the still world outside, she turned away from the window and climbed into bed, having resolved absolutely nothing and convinced of a sleepless night.

*~*~

Buffy slowly woke the next morning, gliding softly and seamlessly out of what seemed like the most restful sleep she’d had in weeks into a world that felt, to her semi-conscious brain, warm and safe and secure. She smiled as she opened her eyes and blinked in the bright daylight that filtered in through the gap in the curtains.

As she woke, she became aware of the source of her comfort. Spike’s arms were wrapped round her, encircling her in his embrace as he slept, his face buried in her hair.

Momentarily she considered extricating herself from his embrace but the small part of her brain which suggested it was soon overruled by the majority who decided there was no better place to be than in his arms. She snuggled closer as she acknowledged to herself how much she’d missed this. More than anything else the two of them had shared, waking up in his arms had always been her favourite thing.

Spike blinked as he woke up, still slightly fuzzy with sleep. He lifted his head and looked down at the mass of blonde locks lying so close on the pillow. He realised that he was holding her tightly against his body and would have moved away, except for the fact that he was now awake enough to appreciate the fact that she was making no effort to move from the position.

“Morning, pet,” he said softly into her ear.

“Morning,” Buffy replied, equally as gently, still making no effort to move, reassured by the fact that he seemed quite happy to hold her. Inside her mind was racing as she dared to hope that maybe things weren’t as bleak as she’d thought they were.

Spike tightened his hold on the petite woman, pulling her more firmly into his embrace as he hugged her, before letting her go as he rolled onto his back. He turned his head to face her, returning her gaze as they looked at each other, so close yet so far away. Buffy ached from the loss of his touch and bit her lips slightly as she tried to decide whether she should close the narrow gap between them and snuggle up into his chest.

The decision was taken from her as there was a sudden knock at the door.

“Buffy? William?” Giles’ voice called from the corridor. “Are you awake yet? Thought you should know that everyone’s meeting downstairs for breakfast in half an hour. Yes, well, see you downstairs,” he finished slightly uncertainly as he got no immediate reply.

Buffy sighed as she realised that the atmosphere - whatever it had been, and she really wasn’t sure - had evaporated with the news of breakfast and the people waiting for them downstairs. She smiled slightly sadly and got out of bed.

“Guess I should go take a shower then,” she said, the statement sounding almost like a question.

“Guess you should,” Spike responded in an equally questioning tone, not once breaking eye contact with her.

Buffy toyed with the idea that he didn’t want her to go, that he wanted her to stay. But as she allowed herself to think that maybe he wanted her, her own insecurities surfaced. She suddenly began to worry that her own wishes were clouding her judgement, that she was imagining things. That she would make a fool out of herself if she tried anything, that he didn’t really want her. *After all, why should he?* she asked herself bitterly.

She suddenly realised that she was standing there, like a statue, simply staring at him. She blushed and disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

She sank back behind the door, lowering herself to the floor and bringing her knees up against her chest. She had no idea what she was doing, or what she should be doing. Everything was so confusing - she’d been used to being the one who was in control, the one who made all the decisions in her relationships. Now she found herself in uncharted waters - too afraid of hitting the rocks to make any move at all, her fear of rejection crippling her totally.

The air smelt strongly of salt, of the sea, and it contained a touch of moisture. The wind blew softly, throwing the occasional lock of blonde hair into Buffy’s face as they walked. It was peaceful here, far from the crowds, hardly another person in sight, just the two of them. She scanned the area to their left, taking in the gently undulating landscape, covered in long grasses that waved gently in the breeze, broken only by the occasional tree and the village in the distance that they had come from. The environment to their right, however, couldn’t be more different. Off the path they were walking along, the grass continued for only a couple of yards before the landscape dropped away suddenly forming a cliff to the sea below them. Buffy could here the waves crashing against the sand and rocks below, a constant, rhythmical sound which, to her ears, only served to add to the sense of peace and tranquillity that surrounded the area.

Her heart felt lighter than it had in almost longer than she could remember, walking as she was along these semi-deserted cliffs, Spike at her side. They had barely said two words to each other since setting out from the village, each seemingly content to walk silently along, enjoying the scenery and each other’s company.

They hadn’t done this in a while. *In fact,* Buffy thought suddenly. *I don’t think we’ve ever done this.* She’d never really considered it before, but now that the thought had occurred to her, she realised that it was true. She and Spike had never just spent time together. When they’d first met, there had been the underlying sexual tension that neither of them had been willing to give a name to, and the whole Riley thing had been in the way like some insurmountable obstacle. Then, when they’d finally got over that one, Buffy’s own fear of starting a new relationship had reared its ugly head. That really hadn’t lasted that long, but by the time Buffy was even approaching being ready to consider a relationship, the dynamic between herself and Spike had changed completely - they were so far gone into the ‘no strings attached’ mode that she hadn’t even considered that they could be anything else. That she could actually have dated Spike properly had seemed such an alien concept that she’d completely ignored the possibility - until, that was, she had been forced to face up to how she felt.

A shiver went down her spine as the path narrowed slightly, and his hand brushed hers gently as they moved closer together. She bit her lip, trying to stop the eternal grin that threatened to break out on her face.

She was happy, just being here with him, just being in his presence, all of the pressure having melted away. Not needing to keep up any sort of pretence - no need to act as if that she didn’t fancy him, that he didn’t mean more to her than a casual shag, that she didn’t love him. Just being. She didn’t dare look at him, afraid that eye contact would break the spell and she would have to return to the world of reality.

Her heart almost stopped as her hand brushed his once more and, instead of it being a mere momentary touch, he gently stopped its swing by catching it in his and holding it gently.

She forced the stiffness from her body, forced herself to at least attempt to act naturally. She looked at him out of the corner of her eye and relaxed instantly, suddenly having to hold back a laugh as she saw that he was acting in exactly the same way. He was looking straight ahead, or to the side, or anywhere but at her, the tension evident in his body even through his obvious attempts to appear relaxed. She smiled slightly as she acknowledged, not for the first time, the fact that sometimes she could read him like an open book.

He must have caught her smile out of the corner of his eye because his body suddenly relaxed - although he still seemed unwilling to look at her.

And it was like that that the two of them continued along the winding cliff top path, hands lightly intertwined, each avoiding the others gaze, comfortable in the silence and each other’s company.

The day slowly darkened as the clouds came and covered the light blue sky, obscuring the sun, but this went unnoticed by the two friends-come-onetime-lovers who walked, now far from the nearest habitation, lost in their own little world.

The wind picked up and the waves on the shore below grew, smashing against the rocks with increased intensity, calling out for all to hear that there was a change in the weather. But still the two didn’t notice.

The first drops of rain fell, but they had prepared for that and simply donned the coats they had been carrying, neither of them worried about the onset of a light shower. Buffy’s heart dropped as she was forced to relinquish Spike’s hand, her nerve not stretching to taking it up again once she had her coat on. Spike, it seemed, wasn’t ready to make that move either and the two of them walked on, so close they were almost touching, yet with a infinitesimal, but seemingly insurmountable, space between them.

Then, suddenly, and - or at least so it seemed to the two who hadn’t been paying attention to the obvious signs of worsening weather - the heavens opened.

They were drenched in seconds, almost before they had registered that it was raining. Buffy couldn’t help but let out a small squeal as the first drop of cold water trickled down the back of her neck, followed by another, and another, until there was a steady stream. Her now soaked and bedraggled hair flopping down into her face, she looked up at an equally sopping and bedraggled Spike.

His full lips twitched as he fought the losing battle to not laugh at the situation. Slowly, the twitch turned to a chuckle, which grew into a full laugh as he looked at her and her newly-acquired ‘drowned rat’ status.

Buffy tried to look menacing, flipping a chunk of dripping hair out of her eyes. Any success she might have had, however, was totally negated when the hair resolutely refused to go and fell immediately back into her face. Deciding that it was no use, she gave up and joined in Spike’s laughter.

After a moment, he squinted up into the sky. “It’s not going to stop, you know,” he declared authoritatively.

“Oh right, and you work for the MET office, then, do you?” Buffy replied, scornfully.

”No,” he patiently explained. “It’s just that any fool can tell that this is going to last for hours - see, you can see the clouds stretching all the way out to sea, and that’s where the wind’s coming from.”

Buffy scowled. “I knew that,” she said, crossing her arms and walking a couple of steps further along the path.

“Of course you did, pet,” Spike said, letting a note of condescension purposefully into his tone. She scowled again, knowing that he was teasing her. “All I mean is that we may as well keep going,” he clarified. “There’s no where to shelter and it’s just as far back as it is on. Plus, I don’t know about you, but I’m bloody freezing now and I think we really need to keep moving.”

Buffy realised that she was, indeed, cold - the rain had soaked through her clothes and now the strong wind was busy cooling the water as quickly as possible. She looked at him, nodded and followed him down the path, just managing to keep up with the pace he set.

She managed to keep up for a good fifteen minutes - in which time they covered an inordinate amount of ground. But eventually her legs just couldn’t keep up the pace anymore and she slumped down onto a nearby rock, breathing heavily.

“You know,” she called to Spike, who hadn’t noticed that she’d stopped. “Some of us only have little legs.”

He stopped and turned, seemingly surprised to find that she was no longer by his side. Quickly, he returned to her side and sat down next to her. “Are you okay?” he asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she smiled. “Just gotta catch my breath, that’s all. God, it’s cold,” she complained, rubbing her arms to try and get some warmth back in them, her coat now no more than another wet piece of clothing, for all the good it did.

Spike leaned over and put his arm around her shoulder, drawing her close in to him. He looked down at her as he cradled her against his chest, smiling softly as he reached up and brushed her stringy hair out of her eyes. She cuddled closer to him, sharing the warmth of their combined bodies and trying to shelter from the rain - at least a little bit.

Spike noticed what she was doing and pretended to scowl. “Hey, no using me as an umbrella,” he exclaimed with a laugh.

“Aww, but you’re so good at it,” she answered, her eyes flashing with mirth.

“Come on,” he laughed, taking her hand and pulling her to her feet. “We need to get going,”

Buffy stood up and nodded, taking the opportunity to casually retain hold of his hand. They continued down the path, avoiding the puddles that were quickly forming.

“Whose stupid idea was it to come for a walk anyway?” Spike asked after a few minutes.

Buffy looked up at him. “Yours,” she simply said.

“Oh.” Spike paused, as if thinking. “Bloody prat.”

Buffy laughed and shook her head. Encouraged by the closeness she had felt to him throughout the walk - the hand holding and the hugging and the little looks, she decided to take a step towards admitting how she felt, just to see how he’d react. She took a breath to steady her voice. “Actually, I’m quite enjoying it,” she admitted.

”What, you enjoy having a steady stream of water pour down the back of your neck?”

“Well, no, but I meant the rest of it,” she continued, dropping her eyes to the ground, unable to look at him, her heart was beating so hard that she swore he must be able to hear it racing.

“The rest of it?” Spike asked, seemingly oblivious to her discomposure.

“Yes, the, well, the being with you part,” she at last admitted, blushing furiously.

“Oh,” was her only answer and she looked away, her only thought that she’d obviously embarrassed him, fearing her had her confirmation that he no longer felt that way about her.

They walked along in silence for a little while longer, the rain showing no signs of letting up. Buffy looked out over the cliffs and watched distractedly as the rain fell into the sea, stirring up the mass of water and making it appear more dark grey than the blue it usually seemed. She didn’t know what to say and couldn’t bring herself to look at him. She wondered whether she should drop his hand, whether he actually wanted her so close to him. But, most of all, she wondered what he was thinking, wished that she could read his mind. What she had thought was an open book now seemed to be firmly closed.

And so they continued, silently, hand in hand.

Finally, Buffy could stand it no longer. “It’s just that, well, we’ve never really done this before, have we?” she asked him in a rush. “Just been together just us, with nothing getting in the way. It’s nice, that’s all,” she spluttered, not really taking the time to think about what she was saying, wondering if it would come out right, hoping that this time she would get a response, something to suggest that he felt at least something for her, that she wasn’t making a complete fool of herself.

Spike looked at her a little oddly, or so she thought, and smiled slightly before looking away without saying anything. He looked for a moment as if he was going to say something, then obviously thought the better of it and started off once more down the path.

The village they had been heading for soon came into sight and the two of them gratefully headed for the little pub which sat on its outskirts. They stumbled through the door, striping their sodden coats off and hanging them on the rack that was fastened to the wall by the door.

Buffy looked round and smiled to herself - it was a traditionally quaint little English pub with low ceilings and exposed oak beams lining the ceiling. She looked longingly at the open fire place, which obviously held a roaring fire during the winter months. It was cold and empty though at the moment, the weather at this time of year generally precluding the need for added warmth. Buffy, however, would have loved to settle down and dry by an open fire right now.

Spike caught the direction of her gaze and laughed. “Yeah, would be nice, wouldn’t it?” he asked, almost reading her mind - though Buffy reasoned that it must be pretty obvious what she was thinking right now.

“We’d definitely dry off quicker, wouldn’t we?” she agreed as they headed for the bar.

“Hiya, mate,” Spike said to the bar tender. “Any chance of a coffee and a tea?” he asked - deciding that hot drinks were the way to go. He threw a look at Buffy, asking for her confirmation and she nodded gratefully.

“Yeah, no problem,” said the bartender, walking off to get their drinks.

The two settled down a few minutes later at a small table in a secluded corner of the pub. Not that a secluded corner was hard to find - the pub was almost deserted - the weather having dissuaded most people from venturing out.

They sipped their drinks in silence at first, Buffy staring out of the window at the sheeting rain and Spike looking distractedly around the room.

Buffy couldn’t think of what to say to him. She’d tried bringing up the subject of how she felt - indirectly, of course - but his reaction had been anything but promising. *More like total ignoring,* she thought sadly. It did nothing to encourage her to be more forthright with him. But she could sense the fact that things were going to have to come to a head soon. She just couldn’t deal with this any longer, being with him and feeling this way and not being able to say anything about it. She sighed audibly, *If only I knew that I wasn’t going to be rejected out of hand,* she thought to herself.

“You okay, luv?” Spike asked, startling her out of her thoughts. She turned to him and smiled wanly, wondering if this was the moment, the time when she would have to admit her feeling, would have to lay herself open to his possible rejection. Her heart felt as if it were in her mouth, beating so rapidly now she almost couldn’t make out the individual beats, no matter how loud it seemed. She bit her lip and looked up into his eyes, holding his gaze for a moment as she formed the words. *Should I just come out and say it?* she wondered to herself. *Just blurt it out - ‘Spike, I love you’? Just like that, obvious and blatant? Or maybe lead into it, talk about feelings and…* her thoughts stopped, mid-stride. *Oh, God - what if he laughs? Or worse, what if he does the ‘Buffy, I don’t feel like that about you anymore?’ thing. Oh God, maybe he would, maybe he’d be really nice about it - I don’t think I could stand that!* Buffy tried to calm herself, her racing thoughts, but it was too late, the moment had passed and she lost her nerve. She dropped her eyes, suddenly finding the finish of her nail polish fascinating. “Nothing, it’s nothing,” she mumbled.

“Oh, right,” Spike replied, looking away and draining his coffee. She took a deep breath and let it out suddenly. Buffy looked up at him and caught his eye for a moment, but he looked away.

“Are you okay?” she asked, wondering if anything was wrong.

“Yeah, I’m, I’m fine,” he said in a distracted tone, no looking at her.

“Oh.” She paused. “That’s good,” she finished lamely, not knowing what else to say.

They sat in silence for a little longer, Buffy picking at a chip in her nail polish, Spike gently shredding one of the beer mats which had been lying on the table.

Suddenly Spike threw the paper remnants down.

“Buffy,” he said, determinedly, turning to her.

“Yes?” she asked, looking up to meet his intense gaze.

He took a deep breath and nodded to himself before speaking again. “You once told me that you didn’t want to know how I felt. And so I never said anything.” He paused, seeming to collect himself before carrying on. “But I can’t do it anymore I can’t carry on pretending. I love you,” he finished simply, before falling silent, waiting for her response.

Buffy simply stared at him for a moment, wondering if she’d heard him right. She couldn’t believe it, that he’d said it, that she’d been wrong. She could feel the silly smile forming on her lips as his words filtered through properly.

“But what about your girlfriend?” she heard herself asking, whilst her mind wondered why the hell she was asking stupid questions when what she should really be doing is kissing him. Her eyes flickered to his lips with that thought. *His full, fabulous, gorgeous, such kissable lips,* she sighed to herself.

Lost in her thoughts, she totally missed the look of confusion which crossed Spike’s face at this. “Girlfriend?” he asked, thrown by her response.

“Yes, I mean, I know you haven’t said anything, but you have to have a girlfriend, I mean - you! There’s no way that you haven’t got a girlfriend!” she babbled.

“Buffy,” Spike said, laughing at her lightly. “I don’t have a girlfriend. I haven’t had a girlfriend for ages. I didn’t want a girlfriend. A couple of dates here and there, but nothing serious,” he explained, taking her hand nervously, making her look up at him. “Well, that’s not strictly true, I did want a girlfriend, but I wasn’t sure she wanted me,” he concluded.

Buffy dropped her head once more, biting her lip. Suddenly, she just couldn’t contain it any longer and the Cheshire Cat grin burst out across her face. She looked back up at him, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears, unable to speak.

Spike returned her grin with a tentative smile of his own. “Can I take that as a good sign?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said finding her voice. “Yes, you can take that as a good sign,” she laughed, before leaning in to kiss him gently on the mouth, savouring the feel of his lips once more against hers, feeling his arms encircle her as he pulled her closer into his embrace, deepening the kiss into a much more passionate one, pressing his body against hers as though the slightest space between them was too much, their soaking clothes pressing against their skin, unnoticed by either.

Finally, they pulled away, gasping for breath.

“Can we start again?” Buffy asked, almost shyly.

“Start again?” Spike asked, somewhat confused.

“Yes. Forget about the horrible things I said and the way I treated you and everything. Just start out again, as if we’d just met - with dating and stuff,” she explained.

Spike smiled. “Now that I can do,” he agreed.

“Good.” She suddenly frowned.

“What?”

“Why aren’t you kissing me?” she asked, the petulant tone in her voice belied by the twinkle in her eyes.

“Good question,” he replied, leaning in towards her.

The rain having stopped some time ago, they walked up the driveway to the hotel hand in hand and now slightly drier; each casting frequent glances toward each other, almost as though they thought the other person may disappear suddenly.

The walk back to the hotel from the village had been a slow one, stopping, as they had been forced to do, to kiss every few yards.

Buffy looked up at the large house with sudden trepidation. “What are you going to tell your parents?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, well, about us.”

“Well, I’ll probably start by saying that I finally got up the nerve to ask you out and that you said yes - y’know - the truth.”

“Oh, right.” She paused. “Jenny said you told her everything. Did you tell them how you felt about me?”

“Of course…”

Buffy smiled. “You think that maybe, well, that maybe the fact that we ended up in the same room possibly wasn’t a hotel mistake?” she asked, the humour evident in her tone.

“You think that… Nah. I mean… You really think?” Spike asked. Buffy nodded, her eyes sparkling with laughter. “She wouldn’t - would she?” he finished.

“Don’t see why not…” Buffy said.

“I think me and mum are going to have to have some words.”

“Come on, let’s go in - and if she did set this whole thing up, don’t be too hard on her, okay?”

“Hey, have you noticed me complaining recently?” Spike asked, pulling her in for yet another kiss.

*~*~

The only other two people in the hotel lounge when they entered were Giles and Jenny, sitting on one of the sofas and sipping tea. Spike threw a glance at Buffy and smiled, a smile that was quickly and happily returned as they walked over to his parents.

Jenny was the first to notice the two walking across the room and she smiled in greeting. “Hi there,” she said, startling Giles into looking up.

“Hello,” he added as Buffy and Spike sat down.

“You two look happy,” Jenny commented, a small smile playing across her lips.

“Yeah, well, we got a few things sorted out,” Spike said, looking tenderly at the girl sitting next to him and taking her hand again gently.

“Yes, well,” Giles interrupted, taking his glasses off and cleaning them. “I have to say, I think it’s about time that you two got things, how did you put it? Oh, yes ‘sorted out’.”

“And this time it’s all above board?” Jenny asked - the smile fully evident on her face.

“Yes, this time it’s real,” Spike agreed, watching his mother’s face carefully. “And you had nothing to do with this?” he asked.

Jenny’s face suddenly became a picture of innocence. “To do with what?” she asked.

“The rooms, the throwing us together?” Spike prompted.

“I just don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jenny declared, but both Buffy and Spike could see the vestiges of the laugh she was holding back. They looked at each other and decided that it was best to just let the subject drop.

“So, it rained then?” Giles asked, placing his glasses back on the bridge of his nose and deftly changing the subject.

*~*~

The door to their room burst open as Buffy and Spike launched themselves through it, tangled in each other’s arms. The day seemed to have gone on forever and now, so late at night, was the first real opportunity they’d had to be alone.

Spike slammed the door shut behind them with his foot, not willing to leave Buffy’s arms for a second to close it properly. He broke the kiss for a second to look into her eyes and smile, before she reached up and tenderly kissed him once more as her hands fiddled with the buttons on his shirt.

She slid the material down his arms to drop in a puddle on the floor as she began to kiss her way across this chest.

“You wouldn’t believe how much I’ve missed this chest,” she murmured before deftly flicking her tongue over Spike’s left nipple. He groaned and ran his fingers through her hair, enjoying the feel of the silky mass tickling against his chest as she moved lower, kissing a path down his firm chest, across his tight stomach, to his belly button. He looked down, anticipating her path as she started to undo his belt.

“I thought you wanted to take things slowly?” he asked with amusement, referring to an earlier conversation.

She stopped and stood up, looking him in the eyes. She grinned an almost evil grin, and lightly swept a hand across his chest, digging in ever so slightly with her nails, a move which made Spike groan with pleasure and anticipation.

“Oh, I do,” she purred, as she reached up to teasingly place a feather-light kiss on his lips. “I want to take things veerryy slowly,” she continued, looking at him now through hooded eyes as she took a step back so that Spike could see what she was doing and her hands moved down to unbutton the blouse she was wearing. She oh so slowly popped each button open, her eyes never for a second leaving his as she watched his pupils dilate yet further, turning his cerulean eyes black, and his tongue flick out to lick his now dry lips. She slowly let the blouse slide down her arms, revealing the cream lace bra she was wearing underneath.

Spike could stand it no longer as he closed the distance between them, his hands coming up to tease the nipples hidden only by the light covering of lace. He felt them harden beneath the garment and Buffy moaned softly as he continued to play, running his thumbs round the nipples one moment, flicking lightly at them the next.

“Slowly,” he murmured in agreement as he reached round to her back and flicked the clasp of her bra, letting it fall to the floor, revealing the perfect breasts he’d fantasised about for so long now.

His eyes raked her now semi-naked body before returning to her face, holding her gaze with a burning intensity that signalled his desire more than any words ever could. Buffy felt as if she could melt away under that gaze and she suddenly felt as if there wasn’t enough air in the room. Her mind screamed at her, wanting to know how she could even consider ‘slowly’ as an option, but she’d set the ground rules and that was how things were going to go.

His arms slipped round her waist, pulling her towards him, their bare skin meeting, their bodies flushed and hot with their mutual arousal. His hands played up and down her back, stroking and caressing, never in the same place for a moment, always on the move, now tracing her spine, then in her hair. She mirrored his movements with her own hands, tracing the muscles in his back, gently dropping her fingertips lower and lower with every sweep, letting them linger for longer at the top of his jeans, gently pushing them under his belt to tease at the very lowest part of his back, a shiver going through her as she ventured still lower to the top of his buttocks.

The kiss seemed to last forever as they gently caressed each other, exploring and rediscovering each other’s bodies, taking their time and savouring every inch, relearning it with their hands. An eternity seemed to pass before Buffy once again found herself pulling at his belt, and this time she met with no resistance. On the contrary, Spike’s own hands engaged themselves in a similar task.

Long moments passed, but soon they were standing there, in the middle of their hotel room, surrounded by a pile of scattered clothes.

“God,” Spike whispered, almost reverently. “I’ve missed you so bloody much.”

“I’ve missed you too,” Buffy agreed, her eyes sweeping his body, open as it now was for her total appreciation, remembering and reliving its perfection, but at the same time, feeling that she was seeing it for the first time, as if she’d never really noticed him before.

She felt almost nervous as they lay down on the bed, his hand stroking lightly over her stomach - a move which would have been classed as ticklish if she hadn’t been so aroused. As it was, it simply made her want the man next to her even more.

She moved closer to him, reaching up to kiss him gently as his hands continued their exploration of her stomach, moving ever lower. She pulled him closer to her, enclosing him in her embrace, letting her passion flow through to him on the kiss. He groaned into her mouth as he moved to cover her body and her hands slid down his back, urging him on. He pushed forward and they both let out simultaneous moans as the feelings slammed through them. He looked down at her, meeting her gaze as they lay perfectly still, simply enjoying the sensation which was flowing through both of their bodies.

“Slowly?” he asked her, his eyes shining.

“Oh, God, yes,” she breathed as he started to move within her, rising and falling in an almost impossibly slow rhythm. She felt herself begin to move with him, their two bodies combining in a way she’d never before experienced. Previously, it had always been about self-gratification, about achieving climax as quickly and as often as possible, nothing more. But this was different. This exceeded anything she’d ever felt before and she pulled him closer to her as they moved in perfect unison, their climaxes building together.

She stared into his eyes, losing herself in him as they came together and she realised that this was where she wanted to be, where she always wanted to be. “I love you,” she whispered into his ear.

As she came down from her high, she looked over at the clock on the bedside table, as it clicked round to show the time as now being 12:01. She laughed and looked up at her boyfriend. “Happy birthday,” she said softly to him.

“Come on!” Dawn shouted as she ran down to the beach.

Buffy and Spike followed more slowly, walking along with Joyce.

“Sorry about my sister,” Buffy said laughingly. “She can get a bit excitable at times. Plus, I think she has a bit of a crush on you.”

“That’s okay - the bit seems like a nice kid.”

“I’ll go and get a table, okay?” Joyce said, speeding up slightly towards the beach-side restaurant and leaving the couple to walk down on their own.

Buffy took hold of his hand as they walked enjoying, as always, being alone with him. The past couple of years she’d spent with him had been some of her happiest. Not that they’d been problem free - the long distance relationship they’d had to endure whilst Buffy finished university had been hard work, but thankfully that had only lasted a few months. After that, Buffy had found the decision to remain in England and move to Yorkshire one of the easiest she’d ever had to make - though she knew her mother had been disappointed to hear that her daughter wasn’t coming home.

Buffy did sometimes miss Sunnydale, especially in the depths of an English winter, but she wouldn’t give up her life now for anything. Spike had understood about her need to visit as much as possible and they were now on one of their frequent visits.

It had been Joyce’s idea to come down to the beach-side restaurant that evening. She said that she’d only discovered it a few months earlier and it allowed the most fabulous view of the setting sun. So, here they were, just before sunset.

The couple reached the table on the balcony and sat down with Dawn and Joyce, enjoying the smell of the warm sea air and the view of the sweeping beach leading to the crystal-blue ocean.

After a few minutes, Spike turned to Buffy. “Why don’t we go for a walk along the beach?” he asked casually.

“Okay,” she agreed, standing up.

“Ooh, that sounds good - I’ll come,” Dawn said eagerly, before she was stopped by Joyce, who shook her head silently. Dawn scowled and sat back down as she watched her sister and Spike walk off.

The two strolled down the beach, hand in hand as the sun sank towards the horizon. Happy to walk with him a first, as the sun got lower, Buffy started to glance back over her shoulder. “I think we should go back,” she said, a little nervously.

”Why?” Spike asked, leading her further down the beach.

“Well, mom wanted us to all watch the sun go down together,” Buffy explained, looking back towards the restaurant once more.

“She won’t mind,” Spike said, unconcerned.

“Spike - I hardly ever get to see my mom, I think she wants to spend time with us,” Buffy said firmly, stopping on the sand.

“Just a little further - round this corner,” Spike argued lightly, gesturing to the curve in the beach that was just steps ahead.

“I want to go back Spike,” Buffy said, resolutely.

Spike sighed. “Please? Just a little further?” he asked.

“I want to go back, Spike.”

Spike shook his head and groaned at her, sitting himself down in the sand. “Things are never easy with you, are they?” he asked, sounding frustrated.

“What do you mean?” Buffy asked, not sure what this was leading to.

“I was going to do this properly, but as you obviously don’t want to play along…” he reached into his pocket and brought out a small blue box. Opening it, he looked up at her, the anxiety clearly evident in his expressive eyes. “Will you marry me?” he asked softly.

Buffy’s heart stopped as her jaw dropped open. She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry as she fell to the sand beside him. The box contained a perfect, simple, solitaire diamond ring - the exact ring she’d said she wanted to be proposed with all those years ago when she’d been avoiding Riley’s proposal.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” he asked, sounding almost terrified.

Buffy looked up at him. “Yes,” was all she could manage, her hands shaking as he slipped the ring onto her finger.

A/N - So, that’s it. I’ve finally reached the end of my very first fic.

Well, what do you think? Was it worth all the anguish and heartache?

Please let me know!

And I’d just like to say thanks to Martha and As for being wonderful betas and really supportive and to Kat for being the pain in my arse that actually got this think written - love you all.

Oh and on a final note - and this is just typical - NBTSA has been nominated for another award - best Work in Progress (!) at http://www.loveslastglimpse.com/awards/index.html. so go and check it out - please vote for me!