A/N: Again, a line or two from 'Who Are You?'

Chapter 20

“Man, this is sweet!” Faith said, still in awe over her recent transformation. She studied her new set of hands and spread her fingers wide before running them down the sides of her body. “Now I know how it feels to be in your boots, B. Got to say, I’m comfy already.”

Buffy didn’t respond, her eyes growing wide as the team of police officers crashed into her mother’s dining room. “They’re after me,” she whispered. “They think that I’m you.”

“You are me, babe. They don't care about who you are on the inside because you're wearing the right costume. They’re going to hunt you down. You’ve got the face of a cold-blooded killer.”

“You won’t get away with this!” Giving Faith an angry shove, she headed towards the stairs at full speed. To make sure that the other Slayer wouldn't be getting to her feet anytime soon, Buffy grabbed random cops as they charged at her and tossed them on top of Faith.

“Great. All cops must have guns,” she mumbled, crouching as she ran, bullet holes peppering the wall the behind her. Buffy went directly to her room and opened the window. “Here’s hoping that I land on my feet.” She glanced at the ground briefly before jumping out of the house.
***

“They’ll take care of her. I don’t want to waste anymore of my time, besides I want her to be chased a little. A game of cat and mouse will do her some good. She needs some cardio after being in that coma for so long.”

“Buffy, are you positive? Having Faith free to run the streets does not seem like a good idea.”

“Don’t worry about it, Jeeves,” Faith said, giving the Watcher a light punch on the shoulder. “If she gets too rowdy, I’ll help the boys in blue out.”

“Oh, Buffy! I'm so happy to see that you're okay!” Joyce exclaimed, giving her a tight hug. "I can’t believe the nerve of that girl!”

"Ah," Faith awkwardly held Buffy's mom and patted her on the shoulder, “yeah, she’s a real pain in the ass." Once Joyce let go of her, Faith took three steps back. "You know, guys, I’m kinda bushed from fighting the big fight; I think I’ll just run upstairs and,” she paused, noticing that a man was staring at her from across the yard. Her eyes narrowed, her Slayer senses instantly recognizing him as a vampire.

“I’m sure Spike won’t mind if you stay the night. Your room’s always open, honey.”

“Spike?” Faith repeated, the name sounding vaguely familiar. “Oh, I remember, William the Bloody..."

"Come on, guys. I know who he is,” she laughed, after catching Joyce and Giles as they exchanged concerned looks with each other. “I may have gotten knocked around, but I wasn’t hit that hard. Here, I’ll even prove it. Me and the vamp will have a confab, alright?”

“Hey,” she called, walking to where Spike was leaning against a tree, “aren’t you going to see if I’m feeling okay or are you just going to sulk there in shadows?”

“We should go after that girl, pet. She’ll take out all of Sunnydale’s police force in one swoop. They may be a flock of idiots, but it’s the right thing to do.”

“It’s the right thing to do? I’m guessing that they aren’t making evil here like they used to.”

“Tell me about it. It pained me just to utter those last few words.” Spike smirked and took a few steps towards her. “It’s up to you, but I wouldn’t mind bagging another Slayer. Three’s a magic number, you know.”

“If you insist, go for it,” she shrugged. “It won’t hurt my feelings if she bites the big one. I already stabbed her once.”

“Alright then, we can pick up some weapons and--.”

“Whoa. We? You look like a big boy; I don’t think that you need a babysitter. I softened her up for you. You can do the rest,” she said, ending their conversation by turning on her heel.

“What’s your deal?” she demanded once Spike grabbed her arm. “Don’t get crazy on me just because I don’t want to work anymore tonight! I did my part already!”

“Buffy, what-are you acting out because of earlier? I was more than lenient--.”

“Get off.” Faith jerked side-to-side, trying to get out of his grasp. “I don’t know what your problem is, but--.”

“My problem? What’d she do to you?” Spike gave her a hard shake and looked her in the eye. “If you don’t want to fight her, I don’t care. Don’t be a bitch about it.”

“Let go of me or you’ll be sorry.”

“Buffy--.”

“Okay, that’s it.” With a growl, Faith smacked her forehead into Spike’s, causing him to stumble back in both pain and surprise. “I’m not sure what we were to each other-if we were fighting buddies or whatever,” she kicked him in the stomach and sent him flying into the tree, “that’s going to change from now on. I fight alone. You got that? I don’t need any backup and especially not from a fucking leech like you. If you want to chase around the other Slayer, do it. Have a party. I hope she dusts you.”

“Creep,” Faith muttered as she walked away, leaving Spike staring at her in disbelief.
***

Buffy closed the heavy door of the crypt and collapsed against it. “Oh, this is bad,” she panted, closing her eyes. She slid to the ground and felt sorry for herself until a little jingling noise caught her attention.

“Mr. Kitty, come here.” Buffy patted her leg and was relieved when the cat came to her. “Do you recognize me or are you just a friendly little boy?”

As Buffy petted the kitten, he purred and leaned into her touch.

“What have you got here?” Smiling, she touched the homemade collar that was carefully fastened around its neck. “And he claims to be a big bad,” she said, playing with the silver bell and knowing that Spike had constructed the temporary collar.

“God, I hope Spike knows that she isn’t me.”

Getting to her feet, Buffy went down the ladder and into their bedroom. She walked past their bed and stopped in front of the bathroom mirror.

“He’ll know. He’ll know that she isn’t me,” she whispered, staring at the reflection that she didn’t recognize as her own.
***

“She’s been brainwashed!”

“I doubt that Faith could do that in so little time.”

“Then she did a spell! A curse!”

“Faith has never shown an interest in magic--.”

“Buffy’s not all there, Rupert,” Spike insisted. “Didn’t she seem off to you?”

“She said that she was tired.”

“I can handle tired, but then she’s never wanted me to turn into a bag of dust when she’s had the yawnies before!” Spike yelled as he paced in Giles’ living room. “She’s been possessed and I know it. She’s not my Slayer. Sure, she looks like her, but everything underneath is all wrong.”

“She could’ve been joking,” Giles suggested. “Sometimes she does have a rather deadpan sense of humor.”

“’I hope she dusts you.’ Now doesn’t that make you want to giggle? But that was after she head-butted me and kicked me to the bloody ground!”

“Well, that does seem out of the ordinary…”

“Good, now let’s see some more concern here!”

“Where did you see her last? Maybe she shouldn’t be left alone. If she’s assaulting you, who knows how she will act around others.”

“I didn’t look, I was too busy running off with my tail between my legs.”

“You’ll have to find her and you might want to check Joyce’s home for any evidence of foul play or magical doings.”

“Right.”

“Spike!”

“Yeah?” he stopped, nearly out the door.

“The last thing that we need is two unstable Slayers on the loose. If you find either of them--.”

“Right. Can I borrow some of that blasted rope of yours?”
***

“Not to alarm you, love, but did Buffy act strangely before she took off?”

“She was upstairs for awhile. I heard the water running so she probably took a bath. And could hear her talking to herself—that’s strange… What’s wrong, Spike? You say that you don’t want to alarm me, but you look so worried. Should I put some water on the stove?”

“As wonderful as hot chocolate sounds, I have to pass.” Spike stopped scanning the rubble that was once the dining room to look Joyce in the eyes. “Did you find any weird stuff after the fight? Any weapons or wonky looking doodads?”

“Actually,” she headed into the kitchen and came back with the trashcan. “I found this metal thing and Buffy told me to destroy it. I just threw it away,” Joyce admitted with a laugh. “Is this what you’re looking for?”

Spike peeked into the can and grinned. “That’s fantastic. Do me a favor, pet and ring Giles about that? To be safe, don’t touch it.”

“Do you need anything else?”

“Do you have any clue as to where Buffy was going?”

“I thought she was on her way to see you. She said something about seeing her ‘boy toy.’ She also said under her breath about ‘breaking in the clean marine.’ I hear you and Buffy call each other names, but that was a new one to me. Do you know what she meant by that?”
***

Faith sauntered confidently through the Bronze with a pitcher of beer in each hand. “Anybody want to play a game?” she sang, sitting at an empty table.

“Hey, you two.” She curled a finger and beckoned two men from the dance floor to join her. “Let’s see who can drink up a pitcher faster. The winner will get one heck of a prize. I’m feeling generous tonight.”

“Can I play?”

“The more the merrier.” She spun in her seat and her smile faded. “Oh, it’s you.”

“Bloody right, it’s me. I need to talk to you. Outside. Now, Slayer.”

“Wait for me, boys? I’ll only be a minute. I’ll dust this guy and we’ll continue on with our evening.”
***

“You’re not Buffy,” Spike said, holding Faith by the elbow as they walked out of the club and away from any on-lookers.

“I’m not? Who am I then?”

“Why don’t you tell me?” Spike flung her against a nearby dumpster and held her still by pressing her into it. Each time she squirmed, Spike leaned into her harder.

“Oh, you have no idea,” Faith laughed. “I’m Buffy. One hundred percent Summers. What’s the matter? Can’t handle the new me? You want little Miss Stuck-Up Tight-Ass? Too bad because it’s not happening, she’s never coming back.”

“Who are you?” he demanded. He shifted into his vampire-guise and let go of Faith long enough to punch her in the face. Ignoring the painful shocks that came from his chip, he hit her again when she continued to snicker.

“Do it again,” she said, licking the blood that welled up on her bottom lip. “You make it hurt so good. Bust up this pretty little body of mine.”

When Spike let go of her for a second time, Faith took advantage of the freedom. She shoved him back and kicked him with full force.

“Why do you want her back so much, Spikey? You got the hots for her? Tough luck, she’d never touch you.”

“I beg to differ--.”

“All she does is pout and whine and feel the burden of Slayerness. She could have anything, anyone. You’d be the last on her list.”

Faith rushed at him again and they fought until she had him pinned to the ground. “This is more like it,” she said, grinding her hips against his crotch. “Seems like you’re well equipped. It’d be her loss. I wouldn’t mind giving you a test-drive…if you could handle me. I’d ride you at a gallop until your legs buckled and your eyes rolled up. I've got muscles you've never even dreamed of. I’d squeeze you until you popped like warm champagne, and you'd beg me to hurt you just a little bit more.”

Satisfied with her speech, Faith nipped at Spike’s lip before giving him a hard kiss.

“No thanks. Do you always go on like this, on matters that you don’t have a fucking clue about? No wonder my Buffy tried to put you to sleep.”

“Your Buffy? She’d never touch you!”

“You said that already, pet. Care to muster up some new digs?”

“Shut up! She’d never let you close! Sure you’re a vampire, but that’s just filling one of the requirements! You’re not Angel! He’s the love of her life! How could William the Bloody ever compare to her first? Oh-wait, was that a twitch? Did I hit a sore spot?”

“Alright, I’m usually all for talking, but you’re boring me now. I was playing nice since I thought you had the slightest bit of Buffy in you. Now that I know that you’re a phony…it’s time to get a migraine.” With a sudden burst of energy, Spike moved his body so Faith was sent flying into the air.
***

“We saw her at the Bronze, but we didn’t stay around her long because she was so…”

“Mean,” Tara said, with a sad grin. “And her aura was fragmented, scattered all over the place.”

“So, we conjured up this.” Proudly, Willow set a metal piece on the table. “It’s a homemade Katra. We’re pretty positive that it was a Draconian Katra spell that swapped their bodies. Now we just need to find Buffy since we’ve, ah, got Faith all wrangled up.”

“You figured this out on your own?”

“Nope. It was all Tara, Giles. I just helped with the small stuff.”

“The rope won’t hold her for long when she comes to,” Spike muttered, barely paying attention to the Scoobies as he tied up Faith, who was lying unconscious in the middle of the floor. After securing the cords around her ankles and wrists, he lovingly stroked her cheek.

“Should we split up and comb the streets?” Xander asked. “The police have no idea where she is according to the news. She could be anywhere.”

“Then we need to get out there, people.” Spike stood and addressed the others in a take-charge manner. “Xander, you and your demon-girl can help me out on the streets. She’s searching for safe, familiar spots. Giles, you watch her. If she wakes up, give her a whack or two. But not too hard. Remember that Buffy’s going back in there.”

“Spike? What about us?” Willow asked, raising her hand. “Tara and I want to help.”

“Right.” He ushered Willow and Tara away from the others and spoke quieter. “I need you girls to do something different.”

“N-not to look for Buffy?” Tara asked.

“I need to know everything that Faith did while in Buffy’s body. Who she talked to, what she did, where she went and so forth. Ask around and fill in the blanks for me. I saw her at the Bronze a few hours after she left Joyce’s house.”

“Do you think Faith could’ve done something skanky?”

“Would it surprise you, Red?”

“Oh, God, Buffy will just adopt all the repercussions of Faith’s skankiness, won’t she?”

“Make sure you interview Riley,” Spike said, walking off and not answering Willow’s question.
***

“You had sex with Faith.”

“Let’s announce it, Anya.”

“You don’t deny it. Why don’t you deny it? Do you want to have sex with her again? I know that you want to have sex with Buffy, now has your want to have sex with Faith doubled?”

Xander laughed nervously when Spike gave him a sideways glance. “Hey, she’s my best friend! She’s—I’m entitled to a harmless crush! I’ve had it since the first day of sophomore year!”

“He’d still do her in a second.”

“Anya!”

“You would!”

"Anh.. Spike..."

"Want to split up?"

"Oh, God, yes," Xander answered, giving Spike a grateful smile. “And about Buffy…”

“Just bite your tongue. You look around the university. I’ll hit the graveyards.”

“He seems a little on edge,” Xander whispered when Spike walked ahead, leaving them to trail behind.

“Well, his girlfriend is the star of America’s Most Wanted. She’ll be captured and hauled off to jail. Where a large woman named Bertha will terrorize her. I saw it on the television.”

“Thanks for clearing that up.”

“Would you rather we talk about Faith and your desire to have sex with her?”
***

“I’m around that lot for more than five minutes and I feel like eating,” Spike muttered as he entered the crypt.

”But then I wouldn’t take a bite out of Harris even if I could. Anya? Maybe…got to admire her just because she gives him hell.”

He took a bag of blood from the refrigerator and downed it without warming it. After wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he finished the rest of his routine by rinsing the bag in the sink and throwing it away. He was heading downstairs to find a mint that Buffy insisted that he take after every meal when a flash of brunette hair caught his eye.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
***

Buffy smiled before opening her eyes, knowing that Spike was near because of the tingle and wave of warmth that spread throughout her body.

“Hi, honey,” she said sleepily, stretching out of a fetal position.

“Where’ve you been, pet?”

“Having the weirdest dreams. I had this one where I was making my bed at home with Faith-oh, oh my God. Spike?” She sat up and tried to jump off the bed, but Spike pushed her back gently. “No! We need to stop her! She’s-she’s stolen my body!”

“Buffy, it’s alright! I’ve got everything under control. Come on, settle down.”

“Really?” she asked, reaching for him.

“She’s tied up and we’ve got the stuff to switch you back.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Buffy sighed and allowed herself to relax in Spike’s arms. “How long did it take for you to realize that she wasn’t me?”

“Not long. That bint’s a lousy actor.”

“So…she never touched you, right? I mean, I waited and you never…never mind.”

“She didn’t like me much.”

“Thank God.”

“Buffy, what were you waiting for?”

“It’s embarrassing,” she said, her face burning up. “I was-I was waiting for you and Faith. I figured if you thought that she was me, I could stop you from, um, getting physical. And while I waited, I kinda got drowsy while guarding our bed.”

“Guarding our bed? How entirely possessive of you, kitten.”

“Shut up,” Buffy said, finding his grin contagious. “You aren’t the only one who can be insanely jealous sometimes. And don’t call me kitten; I know what you do with them. You’re sick.”

“Oh, Buffy. I’ve missed you.”

She closed her eyes, touched by his soft sincere voice. “I was so afraid that she’d hurt you.”

“She tried, but I can handle some weak kicks and a sharp tongue.”

“What’d she say? When you say sharp, how sharp? And she kicked you? That’s totally something that she’d do, kick somebody who can’t kick back…that bitch.”

“Don’t worry, I kicked. Pummeled a bit too.”

“Tell me you didn’t.”

“Okay, I didn’t.”

“You lie.”

“You told me to, pet.”

“Cute.”

“Too bad I can’t say the same about you. You’re all…brunette.”

“Don’t wrinkle your nose! You know it’s my natural color.”

“I do, don’t I?” Spike smirked, making Buffy laugh. “But really, this body does nothing for me.”

“That’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever told me. I’d kiss you, but…” She leaned in close and eyed his lips. “Can’t.”

“Course not,” he said, licking his lips.

“Stop it. Don’t tease me.”

“Want to get your body back?”

“Very much so.”

“Then what are we waiting for?” Spike stood and offered Buffy his hand.
***
 

Chapter 21

“I shouldn’t have let you out of our place like that. Just because Little Miss Slutty Slayer wears trashy costumes, that doesn’t mean that you’ve got to suffer from her lack of fashion sense. You’re freezing, Buffy.”

“I’m not that cold…”

“No, you’re just covered with goose bumps. You don’t think that I can hear your teeth chattering?” Before the first shiver had its chance to shake Buffy’s body, Spike stepped forward to drape his coat over her bare shoulders. “Wear this for now, but I want it back before the swap. That Faith isn’t taking my leather home as some bleeding parting gift.”

“I’m not even in my body and you still think that you know me so well. You can be so smug, honey,” Buffy teased, snuggling deeper into the jacket. “The only thing that Faith will be taking home is a doggie bag full of kick ass.”

“Is that right?” he smirked, kneeling to button the coat once she put her arms through its sleeves. “Be still while I bundle you up, baby.”

“Hey, that’s my nickname for you.”

“Silly me, I didn’t know that only you had the right to it, especially since I’ve called Dru ‘baby’ for decades now, years and years before you even took your first breath.”

“Shut up, Spike,” Buffy sang with a little grin. “You know, mom used to help me put on my jackets all the time. I had this problem in the zipper department growing up.”

“I can imagine why. Zippers can be tricky, mean little buggers. I’ve gotten my fingers stuck in their teeth more than once.”

“Ow, that has to hurt.”

“It does, like hell. That’s why I prefer buttons.” Standing up straight, he took her hand for a second time and they resumed their walk.

“I wish we didn’t have to come down here. I hate the sewers.”

“We won’t be long. It’s a shortcut and it’s safe. I’d take a few gutter rats over the sodding Sunnydale PD any day. They’re really trying to sniff you out, pet. Did I tell you that I saw helicopters circling our cemetery?”

“Helicopters, for me? Gosh, I must be dangerous,” Buffy laughed. “Is there a reward out for my arrest yet?”

“I haven’t heard, but if the price is nice and high, I’ll be sure to turn you in. I could use the extra cash.”

“Yeah right. You’d miss me too much. You’d get tired of talking only to Mr. Kitty—which, which speaking of Mr. Kitty, I love his new collar, Spike.”

“What are you talking about? I haven’t the foggiest clue to what you’re yammering about.”

“It’s adorable.”

“Bite your tongue.”

“You’re adorable.”

“Shut it, missy.”

“And very sweet.”

“Buffy.”

“Yes, baby?” When he answered with only an annoyed glare, she burst into laughter. “God, this has to be the best time that I’ve ever had underground. Not that it takes much to surpass my premature death and a very painful breakup…”

“You—wait, Angel dumped you in the tunnels?”

“We passed the exact spot a few feet back,” Buffy said, pointing over her shoulder. “It was just before the senior prom. There’s nothing like getting the ‘it’s not you, it’s me,’ speech inches away from a septic tank and then realizing that you’re dateless for one of life’s biggest milestones.”

“Bloody hell…”

“You can say that again.”

“That guy. Once a wanker always a wanker, I say. I should’ve chopped that bugger’s head off long ago. I could of—you know that, right? You see, it was after the Boxer Rebellion. I had just drained my first Slayer and, needless to say it, inflated my ego just a tad. So, we got into one of our usual spats over Dru. Fists and fangs were flying every which way and somehow I got my hands on this tiny dagger with a dull blade, right? I’ve got Angelus in a chokehold and I start slicing away--.”

“Stop!” Buffy shrieked, covering her ears with her hands. “That’s enough! Don’t say any more!”

“Oh, come on, don’t interrupt. I was getting to the best part.”

“You’re talking about carving up my ex, who I loved very much and--.”

“Blah, blah, bloody blah. You were under his spell, Slayer. That wide, never-ending forehead of his threw you for a loop, that’s all. It clouded your judgment.”

“It wasn’t his forehead that made me loopy, Spike. In fact,” Buffy chewed her lower lip, thinking of the best reply, “it was his taut muscles, soft lips, stylish hair, and oh my God, have you seen that sexy tattoo on his back? Hell, just to see him naked...”

“That’s it. Give me my jacket. You deserve a good freezing.”

“No!” Buffy squealed, giggling as he grabbed at her. “Leave me alone!”

“Never.” He pressed her against the nearest wall, his hands holding her wrists and a knee wedged between her legs. “You know, I didn’t think Faith was so bad when I first met her.”

“Oh, please.”

“Don’t roll your eyes. She had this fieriness—this hotness to her. And from what I’m gathering, with her hot leather pants, nice right cross and holier-than-thou glower, if she weren’t completely off her rocker, she’d be a damn good catch.”

Buffy’s frown grew deeper as Spike looked up and down Faith’s body, his gaze igniting the burn of her jealousy. “A right good catch indeed,” he drawled, sounding impressed. “Nearly impossible to pass up…”

“Spike, you are not being cute or funny or anything else and by saying these things, it’ll get you nowhere, but sleeping in one very empty bed tonight. I’ll get my body back and I’ll take it to mom’s house--.“

“But you should’ve heard the nasties that she whispered into my ear.” Keeping his lips slightly parted, he ran a curled finger across her cheek. “She wanted to ride me to a gallop, Buffy.”

“What?!”

“She promised that my knees would buckle and that my eyes, well, they’d roll to the back of my head, but that’d be once I popped like warm champagne.”

“She—what else did Faith tell you?” Buffy demanded, struggling in Spike’s grasp. Suddenly she was so mad and disgusted that she found it difficult to speak with the tightness that gathered at her throat.

“She ruffles your feathers, doesn’t she?” Spike purred. “You hate her so much that you can’t see straight. You hate Faith like I hate Angelus.”

“Well, yeah! Haven’t you been listening to me? She tried to take Angel away from me, she’s stolen my body and now—how dare she talk to my boyfriend like that?!”

Grunting to voice her anger, she tossed and turned her body from side to side. “Let go. I need to kill her. I mean it, Spike, I don’t want to hurt you, but…”

“Funny, somehow I don’t fancy getting hurt myself.” Spike pulled back and at the same moment, Buffy took off in full speed. “Buffy—hey!”

Rolling his eyes and whispering a line of colorful expletives, Spike ran after the dark blur as she charged through the dank tunnels.

“Wait for me,” he growled, catching up to Buffy as she leaped onto the ladder that led aboveground. “You can kill her. I won’t stop you. Just…”

“Let me go!” Buffy squirmed as Spike plucked her from the ladder and twirled her so she was forced to look at him.

“Just wait for me. Besides, I have more to tell you--.”

“God, how can there be more?! What else do you have to throw into my face? Faith talks so, so dirty, so much more than naive little Buffy, who couldn’t even do phone sex right.”

“What?”

“You know what I’m talking about. Don’t play stupid with me.”

“I remember, but—I wasn’t praising her. You brought up Angel’s taut...naked,” he swallowed, unable to finish. “You said those things just to bother me, so I decided to turn the tables.”

“So she didn’t say those things? Did you make all that up?”

“She said every word…”

“So what, you took notes?”

“Buffy...”

“It’s like you know every vile word that she said by heart, Spike.”

“She said some memorable things, alright? But that’s all it was: talk. She was playing with me. She knew that I had feelings for you and she spouted off to tease me. Faith doesn’t have a clue that we’re together.”

“But--.”

“But nothing. Come here and let me finish. I had a point that I was getting at and I don’t know why this got so out of hand.”

“Spike--.”

“Come here. Now, Slayer.”

“Fine.” Sighing, she went into his open arms.

“This would’ve gone so much smoother if you were in your body,” he said in a soothing voice. “You would’ve mouthed off about Angel and I would’ve just taken you up against this wall. I’d fuck you quick and hard and then we’d run home and make love for hours on end. I’d keep you in bed and coming until you forgot your name, let alone my great ape of a grandsire.”

“Spike.” Blushing, Buffy buried her head against his chest.

“If you want to talk dirty, we can work on that, but I’d rather see you go red in the face than hear one syllable from that girl. Every word that Faith said wasn’t news to me. I know what your body can do; I’ve felt every muscle, touched every inch. You don’t have to ride me at a gallop to have me coming in the way that she described. Just entering your wet and willing body is enough to make me see stars.”

“I don’t know what to say...”

“A simple ‘I love you, Spike’ will be alright for now.” He brushed his lips against the skin surrounding her mouth until they both moaned in frustration.

“I love you, Spike.”

“And as soon as you get your body, you’ll show me how much?”

Buffy nodded and tried to smile, feeling silly with a bright flush still spreading across her face. “Until then, please leave Faith’s body alone.”

“That won’t be a problem. I want you and not just half the package. It’d be like opening a Happy Meal and finding that there’s no toy inside or vice versa, having all the inside parts, but no nifty cardboard box to put it all in. Now, shall we?” he said, gesturing to the ladder. “Ladies first.”

“Spike, don’t compare me to a Happy Meal. I know what you used to do to your Happy Meals with legs.”

“Look at you and your memory,” Spike chuckled, following her up the ladder. “For someone who used to hate me so passionately, you seem to recall all of our conversations.”

“You’ve said some memorable things,” Buffy answered, a smile tugging at her lips.

“Ah, I see...”

“No, you don’t! It’s different with Faith. She—God, I don’t know how to explain right now but, it’s just different.”

“I know what you’re getting at.”

Once aboveground, Buffy helped Spike climb onto the streets. “All that stuff you just said… I won’t be forgetting it anytime soon.”

“The bits that Faith said or…”

“The bits that you said,” she whispered, giving him a shy kiss on the cheek. “I can’t wait to get my body back.”

“I won’t be sleeping alone tonight?”

“No.”

They exchanged heavy stares until Spike asked, “On the way home, we’ll take the shortcut through the sewers?”

“You can count on it.”
***

“You assholes! Guys, if you don’t let me out of here, I’m gonna...”

“She’s been yelling hysterically since you left,” Giles said, closing door and cutting off Faith’s loud threats. “I decided that it would be best to lock her up just for some relief. She hasn’t been able to untie herself. The ropes were stronger than you thought.”

Spike nodded, his attention directed to Buffy, who was feet away, searching through Giles’ chest of weapons. “Buffy wants to kill her, you know that, right?”

“It seems like a normal response,” Giles replied, taking off his glasses and cleaning the lenses with a handkerchief.

“Normal, yes, but Buffy’s not a killer. If she kills Faith, it’ll eat her up from the inside out.”

“Are you going to talk her out of it?”

“There wouldn’t be a lot of talking involved, mate. It’d be more like me pleading and her laughing in my face.”

“Okay, I’m ready,” Buffy said, cheerfully. “You want to join me, Spike? I figure you can help with the Katra thingy and then hold her still while I chop her to bits--.”

“There will be no chopping, Miss Summers.”

“Who are you?”

“Is she in here, Rupert?” the British man asked, stepping past Buffy and ignoring her question.

“Yes, and she’s irate. Be careful.”

“Don’t worry, we’ve got enough tranquillizers. She’ll be sleeping for days.”

“Giles? What’s going on? Is he—he’s from the Council, isn’t he?” Answering her own question with a whispered curse, Buffy instinctively stepped in front of Spike as a shield. “What is he doing here? Did you call him?”

“The Council is here only for Faith,” Giles explained after clearing his throat. “She’ll be airlifted to England, where she will be rehabilitated.”

“That explains the helicopters. You’re a dog, Watcher,” Spike mumbled, secretly pleased by the turn in events. “It looks like you won’t be butchering Faith today, pet.”

“The Council wants to send Faith to rehab…why am I not surprised?” Buffy huffed, crossing her arms. “Only they could think up such a stupid idea.”

“Buffy,” Giles said, looking anxious. “Faith shouldn’t be your responsibility, n-not to kill or to watch over like a child. Let the Council take her out of your hands.”

“We’ve tried rehab, Angel tried and it didn’t work. She can’t be helped unless she wants to change and she doesn’t. They can airlift Faith to anywhere in the world and I can guarantee that it’ll go bad somehow. She’ll never not be my responsibility, Giles. I’m the Slayer, when she messes up, I’ll be the first one that the Council calls to pick up the pieces, you know that.”

“Yes, but…”

“Okay, don’t make me separate you two.” Spike stepped between the arguing Slayer and Watcher to point to the room in which Faith was being held. “We have heavier issues at hand. Your Council guy is in there, all alone, with our loony Slayer still in Buffy’s body. Doesn’t anyone else see that as a reason to be concerned?”

Buffy looked at Giles one last time before nodding. “You’re right, we need to stop him before he gets too happy with his tranquillizers. When I get my body back, I’d like to be fully conscious.”

“Giles, get the Katra. Buffy and I, we’ll get this show on the road.”
***

“That’s it? The Council came, saw and took Faith away.”

“That’s pretty much all that happened, Xand.”

“Well, it’s that just anticlimactic!”

“I guess so,” Buffy laughed softly as she rested her head on Spike’s shoulder.

“I feel like I’ve been cheated. Here Faith woke up and did the wacky with your life and she gets no punishment, but a trip to England? Okay, let me see some hands. Who else feels like they’ve been cheated?” One by one each of the Scoobies raised their hands in agreement. “See, I’m not the only one who feels this way. Let’s call the Council back and demand a smack down!”

“Do you agree with them?” Spike whispered into Buffy’s hair. “Are you disappointed?”

“A little.”

“But at least you don’t have her blood on your hands.”

“Yeah, no more than when I stabbed her,” Buffy shrugged, running her fingertips up and down Spike’s forearm.

“At least we were able to bop her over the head,” Anya pointed out. “Giles wouldn’t let us poke her with anything pointy, but we could hit her over the head as many times as we wanted.”

“Is that true, Giles? No wonder my head hurts. Thanks for beating me up, guys.”

“We were hoping to keep Faith incapacitated...”

“We didn’t mean to hurt you,” Willow added, looking apologetic. “And for the record, I just hit you once. It was Xander and Anya who got carried away. And Tara, she passed on roughing Faith up.”

“I glared at her though. I gave her my best angry stares.”

“Thank you, Tara,” Buffy said, exchanging smiles with the quiet girl.

“Buffy, if your head is bothering you, I have some pain relievers. Would you like some?” Giles asked, already getting to his feet.

“Yes, please.”

“I think he feels guilty,” Buffy murmured to Spike.

“He has good reason to feel guilty. Does your head hurt that bad, pet?”

“It’ll be fine by tomorrow I’m sure. I’m just a little achey.”

“Want to head home?”

“I knew you’d be asking that sooner or later,” she laughed, scooting closer to him as they sat on the couch. “I knew that it was a matter of minutes.”

“Well, if you’re feeling achey… We could make a grand exit. I’ll scoop you up in my arms. I’ll carry you home…”

“That does sound nice,” Buffy sighed happily, leaning forward to kiss his lips. Not caring about their audience, she didn’t allow their lip lock to stay chaste for very long. Mere seconds went by before she was moaning loudly and sneaking her hands under Spike’s shirt. “God, baby, I missed being able to kiss you…”

“We’re going home.” Spike announced, easily gathered Buffy against his chest and rising to his feet.

“Here…here’s the medication for her head.” Eyes downcast, Giles offered two pills to Buffy, who swallowed them down without any water. “If you notice any discrepancies due to the spell--.”

“She’ll call,” Spike said, walking to the door.

“But…Spike!”

“Yeah?” He turned, surprised to hear Tara raise her voice. “You need something?”

“Spike, what—what about the project that you gave me and Will, don’t you want to k-know what we found out?”

From the look in Tara’s eyes, Spike suspected that the outcome of their research was not news that he wanted to hear. “Just, ah, stop by tomorrow? Close to sundown. Can you do that, love?”

“Spike, what project?” Buffy asked, once Spike continued to head out the front door. “Did I miss something?”

“It’s nothing, sweetheart. Let’s just worry about getting you home and tending to your acheys.”
***
 

Chapter 22

“You’re just too good to me.”

“Peaches never carried you home through the streets of Sunnydale, now did he?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“He’s been known as a lot of things, but that sod’s never been as gallant as yours truly.”

“You’ve definitely got chivalry down,” Buffy smirked as Spike lowered her from his arms. Once her feet landed on the floor of their crypt, she stepped forward to rest her head against his chest. “Does the Angel bashing ever get old for you? You’ve hated him for decades.”

“It gets more and more enjoyable as the years pass. In fact, next year is looking exceptionally promising already.”

“You’re such a pain in the ass,” she teased. Sliding her hands up his body, Buffy tilted his head downward so she could give him a kiss.

"But you love it."

"You're totally right. I do." Between snickers, she continued to lazily explore his mouth. “I love everything about you, Spike.”

"Are you feeling any better?"

"Well...no. My head's full of bumps, I'm starving and really beat. It all makes me wonder about the things that Faith did or could’ve done in my body."

"Oh? Why do you say that?"

"It just seems clear to me that she didn't curl up on a couch somewhere for some alone time with a TV. I mean, smell me. I smell funny, don't I?"

"I wasn't going to bring it up," Spike said, wrapping his arms around her lower back. "I figured I'd coax you into the shower in a few minutes."

"Do you think she got drunk? Could this be a hangover?"

"Baby hasn’t had her first hangover? Remind me to pop your cherry later. We’ll have you hugging the toilet all night long.”

"But not everyone has to hug toilets, right? Maybe I am drunk or uh, tipsy, but I have a strong stomach."

"Okay, maybe you have a strong stomach." Rolling his eyes, Spike tucked Buffy's hair behind her ears. "Tell me about your musings on Faith. You think she did something bad, yes?”

"Something very, very bad."

“But you don’t know what.”

“No,” Buffy frowned. “Who really does know besides her?”

"The people who were around her. I had the witches poke around for us. They played detective and hopefully found us a few clues."

"Oh, so that's what you and Tara were being so secretive about..."

"No, not secretive. Didn't want to upset you over nothing.”

“It may not be ‘nothing’. With Faith it is never ‘nothing’. I can’t be that lucky.”

“We’ve had enough turmoil and mayhem for one day. Let’s not no say another word about that floozy until tomorrow.”

“But that’s my life, Spike,” Buffy whined, hiding her face into his shirt. “At least once a week there’s some sort of chaotic event. God, and lately it’s been one thing after another. I barely have enough time to catch my breath--.”

“Giving you all the more reason to take it easy whenever you can. It’s called procrastination, Slayer. Use it. Why go looking for trouble? ”

“Because then I can have the upper hand when Mr. Trouble thoroughly kicks my ass on Tuesday.”

Chuckling, Spike led her towards their kitchen area with his arm around her waist. “You need to unwind, pet.”

“Have you been talking to F-uh, to she who will not be named? Because she always said I was--.”

“A stuck-up tight-ass with no sense of fun?”

“It’s not true, is it?”

“No, of course not,” he snorted, looking into the refrigerator. “I’m just saying you should unwind as code for ‘let me get in your knickers’.”

“It’d probably get the job done, wouldn’t it?” With a laugh, she leaned against the old table that acted as their countertop. “So, whatcha making me?”

“A sandwich. It’s quick and easy, but it’ll make you full. What do you want in it?”

“Turkey. No mayo, just mustard.”

“Coming up.” As Spike prepared her meal, Buffy looked on with a smile that spread from ear to ear. “Is there something you’re finding particularly amusing? Care to let me in on the joke?”

“I thought it was weird to see you in an apron with my mother, but it just dawned on me that beneath the bad boy exterior, you’re nothing but a domestic goddess at heart.”

“You got that from me slapping turkey between two slices of bread?” he asked, handing Buffy her sandwich. “If that’s your definition of a domestic goddess--.”

“Okay, I’ll admit I was stretching a little for the sake of a joke, but still, it’s strange to see my formerly most evil enemy acting so…normal, so hu--.”

“Don’t even say it.” After putting away the ingredients he had been using, Spike reached for a bag of blood and a box of crackers. “Say that I’m acting like a human and I’ll do everything in my power to make you think differently. We’ll sleep in a fucking coffin, there’ll be love bites with every shag, I’ll--.”

“Wear a nifty cape?” Buffy suggested with her mouth full. “Talk like Dracula by replacing your ‘w’s with ‘v’s? I vant to…ah, you get the picture. I’m okay with you talking like that. Just make sure that you don’t call me your dark princess or your mistress of the night. That’ll make me cranky.”

“And I wouldn’t want a cranky Buffy...”

“Spike, do you have to make your blood all clumpy?” Wrinkling her nose, she looked away as he crumbled crackers into his blood. “Ew, I’m eating here.”

“And I’m eating here too. You try being on a liquid diet. It’s no picnic.”

“Ha, liquid diet. You eat more solids than I do.”

“You going to nitpick at everything I do?”

“Probably. I’m tired and I smell. Nitpicking is bound to happen.”

“You full now?”

“Pretty much. Thank you for the food, honey,” Buffy said sweetly, giving Spike a kiss on the cheek before heading downstairs. “Want me to get the shower ready?”

“Sure, I’ll be down in a few.”
***

“Let’s see, what do I spy with my little eye?” After sharing a shower, Spike led Buffy to their bed. He swept her hair over her left shoulder and slid the robe that she was wearing off her shoulders. “So far so good, but I need to see more.”

“How’s this?” Buffy asked, standing just long enough to allow the robe to drop and gather at her ankles.

“A definite improvement.”

“Join me?”

“Like I could stay away.” Staying on all fours, he hovered inches above while he continued to inspect her skin. “Oh, here’s one. This is new…and this, this is a new bruise as well.”

“You know my body better than I do,” Buffy purred, running her fingers through his damp hair.

Taking her comment as a compliment, Spike smiled a close-lipped smile before searching her legs. “I might’ve given you this one…”

“You absolutely gave me that one,” she gasped once his fingers brushed against her inner thigh. Her eyes grew wider as he pushed against the two fang-shaped scars.

“Mmmm, I did, didn’t I?”

“You asking me trick questions?”

“My feelings would’ve been hurt if you had forgotten how you received that particular mark.”

“I didn’t forget. I doubt that it’s even possible.”

“You flatter me,” he whispered, outlining her bottom lip with his thumb.

“I’m not lying. It’s what I think about when I’m bored in class.”

“You think about it?”

“Is it too hard to believe?” Pulling him down, she wiggled until she was comfortably sheltered underneath his weight. “So, what do you think?”

“Other than the blows you took to the head, you seem to be in top shape to me.”

“And that,” she mumbled, brushing kisses on his face, “coming from he who knows all about my body…is something that I’m happy to hear.”

“You really—in a classroom of tens, sometimes hundreds—you really think of me?”

“I think of you,” Buffy insisted with a laugh. “I think about your fingers, lips, teeth, eyes, elbows—I could go on and on.”

“Please do. It’ll give me fuel for my fantasies when you leave me tomorrow.”

“I’d rather be with you.”

“Don’t, or I’ll make you stay.”

“You’d make me?”

“Tie you to the bed.”

“I’d get a rope burn.”

“Not if you didn’t put up a fight. Not if we used scarves,” he said, biting his lower lip.

“You…do you have a lot of experience with that kind of stuff?”

“What do you think? Remember, I’ve been around for over a hundred and twenty-six years.”

“So, you’ve been there and done just about anything?”

“And everything.”

“Wow, and I felt inexperienced before…”

“Don’t, Buffy.”

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

“I’m not.”

“Bloody hell,” Spike groaned, rolling off her body. “Here it comes.”

“Hey, come back. I won’t say a word.” Spooning against his back, Buffy kissed his shoulders. “It’s not like I’m going to ask for a number. I don’t want to see your little black book.”

“If you did, I bet you’d be disappointed.”

“Oh. Well, I-I’d understand, you’ve been around for a very, very long time. It only makes sense that you have a very, very long list of lovers.”

“Didn’t you say you were tired? Go to sleep.”

“Is it that bad? Spike—okay, you don’t have to tell me. Gah, yes you do! Spike! Now the suspense is killing me! Please?”

“Go to sleep,” he said, taking the pillow from under his head and using it to cover his face.

“Please? Please? Baby? Honey? Uh…sweetie?” She attempted to nudge him onto his back, but he refused to cooperate. “Will you at least take the pillow away? You can tell me, Spike. I won’t wig, I promise. I’m sure since you’ve been a-around that you’ll easily double—triple, uh, have more than my measly two. Because let’s say that you just had two dates a year, that’d be um…fifty—sixty…um, something in that family...”

“Sixty-three, pet.”

“Thanks, Willow used to do all the math when we’d calculate Angel’s past flings.”

“You use to calculate…never mind, I’m not surprised.” Returning the pillow under his head, he finally turned to face her. “What number did you decide on with Chuckles? Did he ever give you a yay or nay?”

“I never asked. We didn’t share as much as you’d think.”

“He’s not really a talker when he’s souled up. Now, when he’s Angelus--.”

“I know, he was a total motor mouth,” Buffy added, rolling her eyes.

“Would it really make you feel better if I gave you a number?” Spike asked softly, bringing her closer with an arm around her waist.

“I’d let you round down a little to protect my feelings.”

“We’re even, Buffy.”

“We’re…even? Do you mean eleven?”

“No, two and one was usually fell into the realm of non-consensual, but you make three. That makes us even. Three for three. And if it helps, you’re my first human to boot.”

“Non-consensual?”

“Ever thought about what it’d take to make a shy poet into a monster named Spike, who impales people with railroad spikes? Sure there are the merger effects of just being vamped, the lost soul, unbeating heart and whatnot, but after I was changed, I wasn’t any different from the jerks you stake the moment they pop out of the ground.”

“Dru and Angel…”

“Without them, Darla included, I wouldn’t be here though. We went our separate ways, but they got me through the early years. And it explains the Angel bashing, now doesn’t it?”

“And the insecurities.”

“Hey--.”

“This means so much to me,” Buffy whispered, holding a hand to his cheek.

“Are you disappointed that I’m not the man-whore that you were expecting?”

“No. A world of no.” She let out a laugh before Spike kissed her mouth.

“Can we sleep now, Buffy?’

“Sure, I’ve been sleepy for awhile now,” Buffy yawned, resting her head against his chest. “You were the one who insisted that we stay up talking.”

“Bite me, Slayer.”

“Maybe…in the morning though. I love you, Spike.”

“Love you too, Buffy.”
***