Chapter 17:

When Spike felt her tense up, he ran his left hand slowly down her back, which only caused her to jolt.

“Are you okay?” he asked quietly, genuinely concerned that maybe he had hurt her somehow. She nodded slightly, unable to respond verbally, still freaked out from what had just happened.

‘I just had sex…on the hood of a car…with Spike,’ she thought, trying to regulate her breathing as panic set in. ‘Unprotected sex with Spike on the hood of his car. Oh my god.’

“Luv, talk to me,” he said, worried.

“I’d like to move,” she replied. “This position is really uncomfortable.”

He pulled out of her slowly, even though his body hated the loss of contact. Whether or not she was willing to admit it, her body missed his just as much.

“Thanks.” She straightened out her bikini and kept her back to him, not willing to look at him.

‘That’ll just make things worse,’ she thought. ‘Then again, things are already ridiculously bad.’ She heard him pull the zipper up on his jeans and take a deep breath.

“I’m going to go inside,” she said quietly, moving away from him. He raised an eyebrow and quickly grabbed her arm, stopping her. She looked down, still afraid to meet his gaze.

“What’s wrong, Buffy?” he asked, running his hand over her hair.

“I…should clean up,” she said, looking at the house as he studied her.

“You can’t just walk away from this because you’re afraid to talk about it,” he said, figuring out what was going on in her head. “This isn’t just something you can push aside because talking about it doesn’t suit you.”

“I know,” she admitted, looking at him and seeing the hurt and confusion in his eyes. “I just can’t do this right now.”

“Go get cleaned up, then,” he said. “We can talk about it later.” She looked at him graciously before quickly going towards the sliding door in back and letting herself inside. He watched her sadly and sighed.

‘This is just bloody brilliant,’ he thought. ‘You shag her on your car- how romantic, you stupid wanker.’ He trudged towards the house, wishing he could do it all over.

* * * * *

As soon as Buffy got inside, she ran upstairs and into the bathroom, instantly taking off her bikini and getting in the shower, the water washing away every trace of him on her. Not only that, but it was also disguising the tears that began to fall from her eyes. She had never been more confused in her life and couldn’t believe that she had let it happen.

‘What were you thinking, Summers?’ she asked herself, running her hands over her eyes. ‘Just because your body wanted him doesn’t mean your heart did. Or, for that matter, your conscience. I mean, the guy in question is Spike. Spike. The guy who has belittled and hurt you since the day you met him.’ She sighed. ‘But he’s not that guy anymore. At least, not all of the time. He can actually be nice…when he wants to be.’ She groaned in frustration and raised an eyebrow when she heard a knock on the door.

“Can I come in, pet?” Spike asked, standing in front of the door and hoping she’d say yes.

“I’ll be out in a minute,” she replied, shutting off the water and wrapping a towel around her body. When she realized the only clothing she had in the room was her bikini, she frowned.

‘I don’t really want to put that back on,’ she thought. ‘Guess I’ll just make a beeline to my room and get dressed.’ She paused. ‘While he’s not in the room.’ She ran a brush quickly through her hair before opening the door and looking at him. He had put on a t-shirt and a different pair of jeans after cleaning up in the bathroom on the first floor. The nervousness in his eyes made her expression soften a little.

“Can we talk now?” he asked, putting his hands in his pockets.

‘He looks like a scared little boy,’ she thought. ‘And incredibly insecure.’ She frowned and looked down. ‘This is all my fault, isn’t it?’

“I want to get dressed first,” she replied, exiting the bathroom and walking to the guest room. Before she could shut the door for her privacy, he walked in and closed it behind him. “Can I please get dressed alone?”

“Buffy…”

He trailed off with a frown as she looked at him.

“Spike,” she replied. “Please.” He nodded and left the room, closing the door and standing beside it, leaning against the wall.

“Will you just answer one question?” he asked, running a hand through his hair.

“What?” she asked, quickly sliding on her clothing and pulling her hair into a ponytail.

“Do you regret it?” he asked, and she looked at the door, taking a deep breath.

“I honestly don’t know,” she answered, walking to the door and opening it. They looked at one another, and it was obvious to Buffy that Spike didn’t regret it at all.

‘He wanted it to happen more than I did,’ she thought. Before Spike could say anything, they heard the front door open downstairs. ‘Anne must be home.’

“Hello, kids,” she called upstairs. “I’m home early and thought maybe we could go out to dinner.”

“Actually, I think I’m going to go home to check in on my mom,” Buffy said, looking at Spike for a moment, which she instantly regretted. The hurt she saw made her feel even worse about the situation. “I’m sorry.” She walked down the hallway and downstairs, seeing Anne in the living room. “But thanks for the offer.”

“You’re more than welcome, dear,” Anne replied, looking through the stack of mail. “I hope your mother is doing well.” Buffy nodded and walked to the door, leaving. Anne noticed that something seemed off with the younger girl and watched her walk down the sidewalk quickly, her arms wrapped around herself.

‘I wonder what that’s all about,’ she thought.

Spike clenched his jaw and punched the wall after he heard the door close behind Buffy. Anne heard a thump upstairs and stood at the bottom of the stairwell, worried.

“Is everything alright, William?” she asked. He held back the tears that were beginning to form in his eyes.

“No.”

* * * * *

Quietly slipping inside the house after midnight, Buffy was starting to regret coming back at all. She could have just as easily met up with Spike at school and resumed her ‘slave duties’ for the last two days of the week before everything went back to normal.

Or as normal as it could get, considering she’d just had sex with the man she’d told herself that she would never let touch her.

‘What were you thinking?’ she silently asked herself as she shut the door behind her. ‘You know how he affects you when you’re in that state of mind, and you still didn’t do anything. It was on the hood of his car, for crying out loud.’

Tiptoeing up the stairs, Buffy made a face when one of them creaked just before she reached the landing. Closing her eyes for a moment, she listened to the soft sounds of the house settling, reassuring herself that Anne and Spike were both asleep. She wouldn’t have to see him until breakfast, and if there was any type of higher power, it would make sure that Anne was there to mediate…or referee, if the case called for it.

Walking into her room, she let the door shut with a soft click behind her, letting her head fall back against the flat surface as her eyes closed, relishing the fact that she’d made it undetected.

“Took you long enough.”

Nearly jumping out of her skin at the sound of his soft voice in the darkened room, Buffy fumbled along the wall for the light switch. Squinting when the bright light illuminated the room, she felt her jaw tighten as she looked at Spike resting comfortably on her bed. His legs were kicked out in front of him and his hands were folded on his stomach, making Buffy more irritated at the fact that he looked so much at home on her bed.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“My house, pet,” he said in a calm tone.

“So, you just decided to hang out in my room for the night?”

“When your room is my guest room, yeah,” he replied, tilting his head to study her. “How’s your mum?”

Meeting his gaze and seeing the honest concern behind the expression, Buffy briefly closed her eyes as she nodded. “She’s good. She’s gone back to work, so it was just a cold last week. Nothing to worry about.”

“I’m glad,” he said, giving her a soft smile.

“Thanks.”

Watching as he got up from the bed and walked over to her, Buffy felt her heartbeat speed up when he came to stand right in front of her. “I want to talk.”

“Figured that much,” she muttered. “I didn’t think you were camping out in here just for the sake of it.”

“I’m serious, Buffy,” he said softly.

“What do you want to talk about?” she asked with a heavy sigh.

“Us.”

“There is no ‘us’,” she replied, immediately feeling guilty for her callous statement as she saw the wounded look in his eyes. “Look, today…it was fun. But Spike, that’s all it was.”

Wishing that there was an easier way to get her point across as she watched him turn away from her to hide the hurt expression on his face, Buffy clenched her hands into fists, resisting the urge to reach out to him and offer what comfort she could.

“Maybe I should have listened to Liam,” he said in a tone that made Buffy flinch.

“Angel? Why?”

“When he told me you weren’t worth a second go,” Spike clarified, turning toward her with a hardened expression. “I always assumed he meant in the bedroom, but since I now know that’s not true, I never thought that he was meaning a relationship with you.”

Tightening her lips to stave off the tears that sprung to her eyes, Buffy took a deep breath before replying. “I guess you’ll never know, since we were never in a relationship.” Watching Spike’s eyes narrow, she continued, “And you know what? We never will be.”

Pushing past him, Buffy tightened her jaw when Spike grabbed her arm.

“Let me go,” she said through gritted teeth. “You got what you want, now let me go!”

Pulling her arm free, Buffy stood her ground, staring at him as he took a deep breath to calm his emotions.

“And do you mind telling me what it is that I want that I got?”

“You name it,” she replied with a shrug. “You’ve been making comments and innuendos all week. We had sex. You got your wish…you went slumming it for a while. You happy?”

“Do you honestly think that’s what I wanted out of this?” he asked in frustration.

“You tell me,” she said softly.

“No!” he cried. “That never crossed my mind. Never!”

Breaking eye contact with him, Buffy looked at the floor, closing her eyes before the tears spilled over. “Can’t we just…”

“What?” Spike asked, the irritation evident in his voice.

“I don’t know,” she said, running her hands through her hair.

“What do you want?” he asked in exasperation, restraining himself from the urge to grab her by the shoulders and shake some sense into her.

“What do I want? I want things to go back to normal between us before everything else got in the way,” she replied, looking up and watching his expression harden.

“That’s what you want?” he asked in a menacing tone, tilting his head to study her. “Fine.”

“What do you mean, ‘fine’?” she asked, turning toward him as he walked toward the door.

“I mean what I said- fine,” he replied, narrowing his eyes. “You want everything back to normal? Then I recall you having a few more days of slave duty before you’re set free, Summers.”

Feeling a lump form in her throat as Spike gave her another look before walking out the door, she finally let her tears escape that had been screaming for freedom since she’d walked away from him that afternoon.

 

Chapter 18 – Another Crack at Normalcy


The drive to school the next morning was absolute torture for both of them. Spike wanted so badly to talk to her and make her see that things could be good between them if she’d just give him a chance to prove it. On the other hand, there was a war raging in Buffy’s head, trying to figure out if she really wanted things to be normal again or if she should give Spike a shot.

‘It’s not like you’ve got much to lose,’ she thought. ‘You already slept with him, and he still wants you- that’s a good sign right there. But can you really take another heartbreak? Or handle being with him? This week has been difficult enough- is dating him worth it?’

Spike pulled up in the academy’s parking lot and took a deep breath before looking at her.

“Ready to carry my bag all day?” he asked, and she nodded, taking it from him and getting out of the car. He watched her for a moment and frowned.

‘This isn’t right,’ he thought. ‘I don’t want it to be like this.’ He got out of the car and locked the doors. ‘But this is how she wants it, so I’ll play along until she wants it to change again.’

They walked inside, silent, and Buffy followed him to his locker, grabbing all of the books he’d need and putting them in his backpack. He watched her sad expression and frowned.

‘Why do I always fall for the stubborn ones?’ he thought, crossing his arms. ‘Oh, right- because I like a challenge.’ She closed his locker and looked at him.

“Can I go put my lunch away and say hi to Willow?” she asked quietly, and he nodded, taking his backpack from her. “I thought I was supposed to carry it.”

“Go ahead,” he replied. “I don’t mind if you’re gone for a few minutes.” She raised an eyebrow, and he gave her a small smile. “It’s fine, Buffy. Say hi to Red for me.”

“Thanks,” she said, walking away quickly and going towards her locker. He watched her, tilting his head, and sighed.

‘It was never supposed to be like this,’ he thought.

* * * * *

When it was time for lunch, Buffy got everything she needed for the afternoon before following Spike to the cafeteria. She put his stuff down at his table and raised an eyebrow when Cordelia sat down two seats away from him, with Doyle sitting in the vacant spot soon after.

“Going to join us today?” Cordelia asked, smiling. “It’s always nice to have another girl around.”

“It’s up to you,” Spike said, shrugging. “You can go sit with your friends if you want. I know you don’t get to see them too often during the day.”

‘Why is he being nice today?’ she thought. ‘Isn’t he still upset with me?’

“Actually, I think I’ll sit here,” she said. Doyle stood up and moved to sit on the other side of Cordelia so that the two girls could sit together. “Thanks.” He nodded, smiling.

“So, how’s it going with you and Spike?” Cordelia asked. Buffy grabbed her soda can out of her bag.

“It’s going fine,” Buffy replied quietly. Cordelia raised an eyebrow and looked at Spike.

“Yeah, it’s going well,” Spike said, noticing that Buffy couldn’t open the can. He took it from her and popped it open before giving it back to her. She gave him a small smile and sipped her soda.

“Good,” Cordelia replied. “I’d hate to see the five hundred you spent not be worth it.”

“It went to charity,” Spike said, frowning. “I’d say it’s worth it.” She shrugged. “No?”

“I could’ve had a nice shopping spree with that much,” she said. “But to each his own.”

“I don’t regret bidding how much I did,” he replied. “Besides, I think I got a good deal out of it.” Buffy looked at him, confused. “It’s nice having someone around who helps out.” She studied him for a moment before looking down. “How about your situation? Doyle treating you alright?”

“Yep,” Cordelia replied. “He’s been an absolute doll. When I broke a nail the other day, he paid for me to get a manicure at one of the nicest salons in town.” Doyle smiled as Spike chuckled.

“Yeah, that’s Doyle for you,” he said. “He understands a fashion crisis like no one else.” Even Buffy giggled at that, and he smiled at her.

‘It’s a baby step,’ Spike thought. ‘But I can get this to work. We can make this work.’

* * * * *

After school, Willow met Buffy at her locker, frowning.

“You didn’t eat lunch with us today,” Willow said. “Did I do something wrong?”

“If you had, would I have talked to you during class before?” Buffy asked, smiling softly.

“Probably not,” Willow mumbled. “But what’s the deal, then? Are you going to be a fixture at their table now?”

“Cordelia asked me to join them today,” Buffy replied, shrugging. “I felt bad for her.” Willow looked confused. “She was the only girl there today, and I can’t imagine having to sit with those guys that long and not having someone to talk to.”

“So it’s not going to be a permanent thing?” Willow asked. “You’re not abandoning me for the popular crowd?”

“You know I wouldn’t do that,” Buffy said, closing her locker. “Not even if my life depended on it. We’re best friends, Will- you don’t just walk away from that.” Willow smiled and nodded. “So, did I miss any gossip at lunch?”

“Not really,” she answered. “I just missed you.”

“I’m sorry,” Buffy said sincerely. “I promise to make it up to you.”

“It’s okay, really,” Willow replied, following Buffy towards the front doors of the school. “Besides, it’s not like I never see you at school or talk to you outside of lunchtime.” They both saw Spike approaching and looked at one another. “Are things still going okay between you two?”

“I guess,” Buffy said, looking down. “I don’t really know.” Spike came to stand in front of the two girls.

“Hello, Red,” he said, smiling. “Ready to go home, Summers?”

“Yeah,” she answered. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Willow.” Her friend nodded and watched the two walk outside. She could feel that something was different between them but couldn’t figure out what it was. When she finally realized it, she froze, her eyes widening.

‘She jumped on the train, didn’t she?’ Willow thought.

 

Chapter 19 – Proving Who’s Boss


Buffy hesitantly followed Spike into the Bronze later that night. She was surprised that he even wanted her tagging along, but she soon realized he probably just wanted someone to get his drinks for him.

Smoothing out her black skirt and red tank top as Spike searched the interior for his friends, a bored expression crossed Buffy’s face in anticipation of the night ahead of her. She liked Cordelia and Doyle, but she would much rather be home with her mom, curled up on the couch and watching an old Fred Astaire movie.

“Want to sit alone?” Spike asked, drawing her attention back to him.

“Me? By myself?” she asked, gesturing to herself as he gave her a soft smile.

“You and me, pet. Not you by yourself.”

“Oh…um…that’s okay. I know you want to be with your friends.”

‘Rather be alone with you,’ he thought but wisely didn’t say anything, unwilling to scare her off. At any rate, he hesitantly placed his hand on the small of her back, leading her through the crowd to his friends.

Fighting the shiver that was threatening to run through her when she felt his fingertips ‘accidentally’ slip beneath her shirt and graze the small of her back, Buffy felt a sense of loss when he moved his hand away, smoothing her shirt back into place and stepping away from her.

It was going to be a long night.

* * * * *

“I think I’m going to get a refill,” Buffy said, holding up her cup as she carefully slid off the tall chair an hour later.

“I can get it for you,” Spike said, making a move to stand before Buffy shook her head.

“No, that’s okay,” she replied, feeling a little shocked that he offered but trying to give him a grateful smile. “I’ll be right back.”

Walking through the club, Buffy almost felt as if she was going to be swallowed by the crowd. ‘It’s Thursday night,’ she thought to herself. ‘Why is it so busy?’

Finally maneuvering her way to the bar, she took a seat at the end, waiting for the bartender to notice her.

“You’ve been avoiding me this week.”

Closing her eyes at the sound of the familiar voice that would be forever etched in her memory, Buffy slowly turned the stool, looking up at her ex-boyfriend.

“I avoid you every week,” she replied, tilting her head to the side and letting her blonde hair spill over her shoulder as she leveled him with a cold look.

“Now, that’s not fair,” Angel said, sitting down next to her with a smile that used to turn her to jelly. “Can’t we just have a nice, civilized chat like two…lovers?”

“What? You want to get back together now?” she asked with a disbelieving smirk.

“In the physical sense? Sure. Why not?” Angel replied with a shrug. “We were pretty good together.”

“Really?” Buffy said with a raised eyebrow. “Thought I wasn’t worth a second go,” she continued, using the words that Spike had so thoughtlessly told her the night before.

Angel’s eyes widened as he looked at her. “Who told you that?”

Closing her eyes and shaking her head, Buffy tried to refrain from laughing as she realized that she’d actually thought she’d been in love with this man. “So, you’ve told that to more than one person?”

“What? No,” he said quickly, shaking his head as she turned to look at him.

“Then you don’t need to know who told me.”

Seeing that he’d dug his own grave, Angel sighed. “It was just locker room talk. You know how it is.”

“Yeah,” Buffy replied. “I do. And I know you, Angel. Which is why what we did, we will never do again.”

Abandoning her cup on the bar, she quickly hopped off her seat and threaded her way through the crowd again, sighing as she got further away from him.

‘How could I think I loved him?’ she asked herself. ‘How could I think that he actually cared about me?’ Looking over at Spike as she slowly approached, Buffy briefly closed her eyes. ‘And is it worth the risk to fall for something that could be an illusion?’

Sitting down at the table and giving everyone a soft smile, Buffy saw Spike’s eyes fall on her before his eyebrows drew together. “Thought you were getting a drink, pet.”

“Um…yeah, the line was too long.”

Raising an eyebrow, Spike glanced over at Doyle and Cordy and saw they were talking between themselves. “That right?” he asked, sitting back in his chair before turning to look at the bar. “Has nothing to do with the fact that your lover boy was over there talking to you?”

“Adding ‘spying’ to your list of talents?”

“Not spying,” he clarified, letting his jaw tick in a show of frustration. “Was worried about you and I looked around. Not my fault you and Captain Forehead were flirting at the bar.”

“There was no flirting,” she said with a sigh. “He was being his usual annoying self.”

Watching the subtle lines in his face relax as he offered her a small smile, Buffy tore her eyes away, feeling uncomfortable with the warm feeling running through her.

‘Don’t fall for him,’ she thought to herself. ‘He’s like the rest of them- he only wants one thing from you.’

But what happens when he’s already gotten it?

* * * * *

Cordelia nudged Buffy about ten minutes later when Spike and Doyle stood up and walked over to the bar.

“Can you believe we’re done with this tomorrow?” she asked, smiling. “I’ll be so happy when I don’t have to answer to Doyle anymore.” Buffy laughed.

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” she replied. “But I thought you were getting along really well with him.”

“He’s a sweetheart, yeah,” Cordelia said, nodding. “But I can only tolerate having to be on call for someone so much.” Buffy nodded, looking at the crowd of people dancing. “What about you and Spike? You’re living with him, aren’t you?”

“Tonight’s my last night,” she replied, sighing. “It’ll be nice to be in the comfort of my own bed tomorrow night and to be back home with my mom.”

“I think you two would make a good couple,” Cordelia said, and Buffy raised an eyebrow, looking at the brunette. “I mean, it’s obvious that he digs you.”

“What’re you talking about?” Buffy asked, hoping Cordelia didn’t know anything.

“I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Buffy,” she replied, smiling softly. “I think he’d kiss the ground you walk on if you’d give him the chance,” she continued, watching as the other girl looked down. “You have feelings for him, too, don’t you?”

“I don’t know,” Buffy answered quietly. “He’s been getting nicer to me and all, but I don’t know how I feel about him.”

“Do you like him more than Angel?” Cordelia asked, and Buffy nodded. “You really dislike Liam that much?”

“Yep,” Buffy answered. “He’s such a jerk.” Cordelia nodded and smirked.

“Well, if you really want him to get the message that it’s over, you could go intervene,” she said, and Buffy raised an eyebrow. Cordelia motioned for Buffy to turn around, and when she did, she saw Angel and Spike standing at the bar, talking animatedly about something. Buffy quickly stood up and made her way to the bar, stopping to stand beside Spike. He looked at her, the fire in his eyes going away when he took in her nervous form.

“Hello again, Buff,” Angel said, smiling at her. She glared at him before leaning into Spike’s side. He looked at her, confused, before realizing that she was trying to irritate Angel.

‘And who am I to stop her?’ he thought, amused, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her against him. She kept herself from stiffening up and settled into him.

“Don’t tell me you two are seriously together,” Angel said, looking between the two of them. Spike grinned and kissed her temple softly.

“Got a problem with it?” he asked, looking at the taller teen.

“She’s mine, Spike,” Angel replied sternly, clenching his fists. “She could never be yours.”

“You don’t own me, Angel,” Buffy replied sharply. “And I will never be yours again. You had a shot and failed. I would never allow myself to sink to your level again.”

“And you think he’s better for you?” Angel asked, glaring at Spike. Spike took a step forward, but Buffy held him back.

“I know he’s better for me,” she said, and Spike looked at her, slightly surprised. “I’d rather be with him than you any day.”

“Is that a compliment?” Spike asked quietly, and she smiled softly.

“You could never truly have her,” Angel said, and both blondes looked at him. “I’ve had more of her than you- a person doesn’t just forget that.”

“I’ve already written off what happened between us,” Buffy said, shrugging. “And you may think you’ve had me more, but I know better…and it was better with Spike.” Seeing Spike grinning proudly out of the corner of her eye, Buffy smiled as Angel’s jaw dropped.

“You two… slept together?” Angel asked, practically growling.

“Yep,” Spike answered happily. “You were wrong about her, you know. She’s definitely worth a second go.” Angel’s eyes widened before he looked at Buffy.

“He’s the one who told you I said that?” he asked, and she nodded. “And you believe him?”

“Yep,” she said, nodding. “Because I trust him.” Spike held her closer to him and looked at her with a soft expression on his face. “Just leave us alone, Angel. It’s never going to happen with us. Not again.” He turned on his heel and pushed his way through the crowd before leaving the building.

“You know, everyone’s going to find out we slept together now,” Spike said quietly. “That’s news that will spread quickly, and Angel’s smart enough to know that.” She looked up at him and sighed.

“I don’t even care,” she replied, shrugging. “Besides, how many people even consider him trust-worthy? Angel will come up with any gossip, even if it’s fake, just to make himself look cool. I highly doubt anyone’s going to believe him.”

“And what if they do?” he asked, running his hand over her bare shoulder.

“Then we’ll deal with it when the time comes,” she replied. He smiled softly and looked into her eyes. “We should probably head home soon so I can do the last of my chores for you. As of 3 o’clock tomorrow, I’m no longer bound to you.” He frowned and looked down as she continued, “I’ve served my week as your own personal slave, and it’s time for me to return to my normal lifestyle.” He nodded and sighed.

“You’re right,” he said. “We should go home. We’ve got school tomorrow, anyway.” She sensed the hurt in his voice and frowned. “Come on, Goldilocks- this place is getting too hot as it is.” She nodded and followed him out of the club, going to his car. “I’m sorry if things were really that bad this week.” She looked at him before opening her car door.

“Me, too,” she said quietly, getting in on her side.
 

Chapter 20 – The ‘T’ Word


Quietly walking into Spike’s house, Buffy bit her lip when his hand found its way to hers, holding tight as he led her up the stairs. She knew what he wanted out of this, but she didn’t know if she could give it to him. At least, not right now.

“Spike,” she whispered when they reached the landing.

“What is it, pet?” he asked, tilting his head to study her.

“About tonight…”

“You were just putting on a show for Angel,” he filled in, trying to give her a smile even though his stomach was tightening as he prepared for her rejection.

“Partly,” she whispered, looking down at the floor. “But, it’s just…”

“Come on,” Spike said, tugging on her hand and pulling her toward his bedroom. “We can talk in here.”

Following him into the room, Buffy let her hand slip from his grasp as he turned to shut the door. Each felt an immediate sense of loss as they were separated.

“Alright,” he said, turning to face her and trying to keep his expression neutral. “This mean we can talk now?”

“Uh oh,” Buffy said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood. “The ‘T’ word. That never leads to one of our better conversations.”

Spike chuckled before walking over to the bed and sitting down. His smile slowly faded as he studied her suddenly serious expression, watching as she hugged her arms around her body and looked up at the ceiling.

“How do you feel about me?” she finally asked, her voice laced with insecurity.

“I like you,” he said, trying to convey the honesty in his tone.

“Like me, as in- want to sleep with me a few times, or-”

“Like you as in like you,” he replied, trying to make her understand.

“Oh,” she said softly, her eyes widening in slight surprise.

“Come here,” he said softly, holding out a hand to her. Seeing her resistance, Spike gave her an easy smile. “Trust me, luv. Not going to push you into anything- just come here.”

Closing the distance between them, Buffy hesitantly let him pull her toward the bed. Swallowing a gasp as his arms banded around her waist, she giggled when he continued to sit on the bed and propped his chin up on her stomach.

“Tell me about you,” he whispered, smiling when her hands ran through his hair, loosening the hold of the gel and letting the curls spring free.

“What about me?” she asked, her eyes never leaving the movement of her hands as Spike closed his eyes in contentment.

“Anything,” he replied, resting his head more comfortably against her as Buffy continued running her hands through his hair.

“I don’t know what you want to know,” she said in a quiet voice, smiling down at him when he pulled back to look at her, letting his hands comfortably rest on her hips.

“Come here,” he said, moving back on the bed. Seeing the panicked expression cross her face, Spike chuckled. “Are we going to have to go through this every time I ask you to get close to me?”

“Maybe,” she murmured with a smile playing on her lips.

Spike inwardly breathed a sigh of relief when she moved closer to him, climbing on the bed and slowly moving to lie down next to him.

Eagerly opening his arms for her to rest against him, Spike closed his eyes as she rested her head against his shoulder and let her hand trail along his stomach.

“What happened to your father?” he asked after a moment, running his hand through her hair.

Buffy swallowed the lump in her throat, closing her eyes for a moment. “He left,” she whispered, drawing strength from him as she relaxed in his arms. “The classic story. Cheated on my mom for years, left us alone all the time, going on so-called ‘business trips’. He’s somewhere in Europe now…living the cliché.”

“I’m sorry,” Spike whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

“I always said that I would never turn into my mom,” she murmured in a choked voice. “Is that a bad thing?”

“Your mum’s a tough lady. Strong, capable…there are worse things.”

“I don’t mean the way she is now,” Buffy said softly. “I mean the way she was…before. She never stood up to him. She never had the willpower to ask him to stop. And she knew,” she whispered with a nod of confirmation. “She knew, every single time that he said he had to work late or had a business trip…she knew what was happening. And she didn’t do a thing to stop it. I don’t ever want to be like that. I don’t want to invest my heart in someone just to let him hurt me.”

“Invest it in the right person…and he won’t,” Spike whispered, pulling her close.

“Right, because there are just so many stand-up guys out there,” she replied with a laugh.

“There’s a few,” he said softly. “You just have to scratch the surface a little. Get past the exterior, and there are a couple of decent blokes left in the world.”

“Like you?” she asked, trying to keep the skepticism out of her voice.

“Like me.”

“You like playing the field a little too much, Spike,” she said, shaking her head. “I’ve seen the way you act with the girls at school. They practically line up for you to use them. Who’s to say your opinion won’t change? You could turn into the kind of guy that you’re so much against right now. It’s just not worth it,” she trailed off in a whisper.

“I will never do that to you, Buffy.”

“Yeah,” she murmured. “You say that now, but what else would you say? ‘I promise to be good to you now, but a few years down the road, don’t expect me to be faithful’. I’m sure my dad said the same thing at some point in time- leaving out the last part, of course.”

“You listen to me,” he said, sitting up and pulling her with him. “If there was ever a chance I would hurt you like that, I would leave. I wouldn’t put anyone through that kind of pain. It’s not worth it,” he continued, shaking his head. “It’s not worth something that, when it all boils down to it, is just a moment in time. Just a moment of sexual gratification with a stranger. A fraction of a second out of a lifetime could destroy everything. Your father was an idiot. To leave someone like your mum- to leave a life filled with happiness with the two women who should mean more to him than anything- just so he could try and recapture his glory days is ridiculous.”

Listening to his quiet declaration, Buffy felt tears sting her eyes as a smile pulled at her lips. “Thank you,” she whispered, tilting her head to brush her lips against his.

“For what?” he asked, looking at her with a hopeful expression.

“For being you. The real you.”


 

Chapter 21 – Time to Spill


When Buffy woke up the next morning, she smiled softly at the feel of Spike’s body against hers. She opened her eyes slowly and looked at him, facing her with a content smile as he continued to sleep. Carefully detangling herself from his arms, she managed to get out of bed without waking him, leaving the room and walking down to the kitchen, ready to make him breakfast.

‘It’s my last morning- might as well give it a shot,’ she thought, smiling when she saw Anne already in the room, making waffles.

“Good morning,” she said, sitting down on a seat.

“Good morning,” Anne replied, smiling warmly. “I’m happy to know you were here last night.” Buffy raised an eyebrow, confused. “You weren’t in your room.” Buffy felt herself begin to blush.

“I was in William’s room,” she said quietly, looking down. “We stayed up talking all night, and I guess I must’ve fallen asleep.” Anne nodded, beginning to make another waffle.

“Well, I’m just glad that you two lasted the week and were civil,” she said. “I’m happy things seemed to work out for you both.” Anne opened the refrigerator and pulled out syrup.

“I was going to try making breakfast today,” Buffy said, looking at Anne again. “Do you think maybe you could teach me how to be a good cook?”

“Working with food is an art, dear,” Anne replied. “It requires creativity, perseverance, and time.”

“I think I can handle that,” Buffy said, smiling. Anne laughed and motioned for Buffy to walk over to her.

“Let’s see what we can do, then,” Anne said. “And, if worse comes to worse, we’ll just give William whatever doesn’t turn out right.” Both women laughed as they began to work together.

* * * * *

Buffy walked into Spike’s room about a half an hour later, holding a tray filled with food. Spike was sitting up in bed, running his hands through his hair to smooth it down. He smiled softly as she came in and sat beside him.

“Good morning, pet,” he said quietly. She smiled and put the tray on his lap. “All of this is for me?”

“Yep,” she said proudly. “I made it all.” He looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “I’m serious! Your mom helped me a lot, but technically, this is all my creation.”

“Well, it’s a vast improvement from day one,” he replied, chuckling, and she grinned. “Have you eaten anything yet?”

“A waffle that went wonky,” she answered, shrugging. “And some cereal. I’m set.”

“Thank you for doing this, Buffy,” he replied, and she nodded, standing up. “Where are you going? Leaving me in bed all alone twice in an hour, pet?”

“Have to get ready for school,” she answered. “I’ll meet you downstairs when I’m ready to leave.” She walked to the door and stopped when she heard him say her name, turning to look back at him.

“Thank you for last night,” he said, tilting his head. “It was nice to actually talk about things and not get in an argument. You let me into your life, and that meant a lot.” She smiled softly.

“You let me into your life, too,” she said, motioning around. “I’m happy that things worked out the way they did, Spike. I had a good time here, even if I had to be ordered around by you.” She winked at him and walked across the hall, to her room. He smiled as he heard her close her door before sighing.

‘I just hope this doesn’t all end after today,’ he thought before looking down at the tray of food. ‘I’ve got one hell of a girl, don’t I?’

* * * * *

After arriving at school, Buffy headed to her locker and saw Faith in the hallway.

“Hey, B,” Faith said, smiling. Buffy noticed that Andrew wasn’t around.

“Hi, Faith,” she replied, opening her locker. “Where’s your master?”

“In the computer lab,” she answered, shrugging. “Wanted to tell his buddies about how I deflowered him.” Buffy raised an eyebrow.

“Does the term ‘deflowered’ appeal to guys, too?” she asked, thinking out loud. Faith shrugged as both girls giggled. “Well, I’m happy things went well between you two.”

‘What about you and Spike?” Faith asked curiously, leaning back on a locker. “Did you two get bouncy, too?” Buffy shook her head, grabbing some textbooks. “That’s not what I heard.” Buffy frowned and looked at her. “The word on the street is that you two went all kinds of naughty.”

“What?” Buffy asked, her eyes widening. “‘Word on the street’?”

“Angel’s been telling everyone he’s seen that it’s true, it seems,” Faith said, smiling. “I would bet almost half of the school knows by now.” Buffy blushed and quickly closed her locker. “Don’t sweat it, B. I think everyone supports it. I mean, you two were the poster-children for agonizing sexual tension. I’m glad you threw it down for him.” Buffy’s eyes widened as she quickly turned and began to walk away. “Fine, we’ll talk later, blondie. And I want details!”

Buffy walked to her first class of the day and sat down in her desk, noticing that everyone around her kept looking at her and smirking. She ran her hands through her hair and stared down at her desk.

‘I should’ve known this would happen,’ she thought. ‘You should never have told Angel. Bad idea, on a very long list.’

Willow suddenly appeared in the doorway and waved for Buffy to join her out in the hallway. She stood up and left the classroom before Willow grabbed her arm and pulled her into the girls’ bathroom.

“You so had sex with Spike,” Willow said, grinning, and Buffy nodded, looking down. “Why didn’t you tell me? I’m your best friend! You tell best friends these kind of things.” She paused. “Right?”

“I just didn’t know how you’d react,” Buffy said quietly. “I didn’t want anyone to know in the first place, but stupid me blabbed it to Angel last night at the Bronze in a quest to get him to lay off.” She looked at the redhead. “Who told you?”

“I heard it in the hallway before,” she said. “Which only confirmed my suspicious.” Buffy raised an eyebrow. “I’m not blind, Buffy- I was picking up on some things yesterday.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Buffy sighed quietly.

“Well, you can tell me now,” Willow said, smirking. “I want all of the details, so you had better spill.”

“We’ve got class in five minutes,” Buffy replied.

“Oh well,” Willow said. “I can miss one class this year.” Buffy giggled and sat on the edge of a sink. “You don’t have to give me graphic details- a brief overview would be fine.”

“Well, Spike wanted me to wash his car,” Buffy began to explain. “So, as his slave, I obediently went to wash his car, and he joined me soon after.” Willow held her hand up to stop her friend. “What?”

“Wait, did you two have sex in his car?” she asked, frowning when Buffy grinned.

“More like on his car,” she corrected, and Willow blushed. “Sure you want to hear all of this?” She shook her head and quickly left the bathroom, the sound of Buffy’s laughter following her down the hallway.
 

Chapter 22 – A Fresh Start


Biting her lip as Spike pulled in front of her apartment complex, Buffy looked up at the building with apprehension, staring at the dilapidated siding as she tried not to think of what came next.

This was it.

Her moment that signified freedom.

Then why did she feel so lonely?

Neither said a word as they continued to stare out the windshield, contemplating what happened next.

“So…” Spike trailed off, tapping his hands against the steering wheel.

“So…” Buffy replied with a slight smile, turning to face him and seeing the softening of his eyes as he looked at her.

“Mind if I come up for a minute?” he asked.

“You sure that’s what you want?” she replied with an uneasy feeling. “I mean-”

“Buffy,” Spike said, cutting her off, reaching over to gently cup her cheek in his hand. “It doesn’t matter to me where you live or how much money you have. You don’t have to do anything to impress me, except being yourself…and I know you don’t have a problem showing me your true colors.”

Seeing the smile on his face, Buffy giggled, relaxing against his touch before nodding. “You can come in, Spike.”

Pulling her closer and leaving a lingering kiss on her forehead before slowly pulling away. “Thanks, pet.”

* * * * *

Relieved to see Joyce Summers walking around the small kitchen and putting away dishes, Spike breathed out a heavy sigh that she did appear to be better. Smiling at the older woman when she turned around and gave him a radiant smile of her own, he couldn’t help but feel his heart tighten when Buffy crossed the room and hugged her mother.

“How’ve you been, Spike?” Joyce asked, still holding onto her daughter as she spoke to him.

“I’ve been well, Joyce,” he replied with a nod. “Your girl has been taking excellent care of me…most of the time,” he added, giving her a bright smile when Buffy turned on him with narrowed eyes.

“That’s what she’s best at,” her mother said, lovingly running her hand over Buffy’s hair.

“Spike’s going to stay over a little bit, if that’s okay.”

“Of course it’s okay,” Joyce replied. “I’ll be in the living room if you need me.”

Arching an eyebrow as Buffy took his hand and led him to her bedroom, Spike waited until she shut the door before speaking. “Your mum has as much trust in us as…well…my mum.”

“Yeah, she’s great,” Buffy said, sitting down on the bed as Spike set her duffel bag on the floor, which he had insisted on carrying. “And she can also hear everything that goes on in here. The walls are paper thin.”

“I see,” Spike said with a nod of understanding, smiling when she picked up a stuffed pig and clutched it to her chest. “And who’s that?” he asked, sitting down and looking at the smoosh-faced animal.

“Mr. Gordo,” she replied, holding him out for Spike’s inspection. “A gift from my mom after my dad left. She said he would keep me safe from anything. Guess I should have brought him with me this week, huh?” she asked with a smile.

“You saying you don’t feel safe with me, pet?” he asked, leaning forward and nuzzling her neck, chuckling when he found a stuffed pig shoved between them as if it was a barrier.

“Not when you’re in a mood like this,” she replied, edging away from him as he tossed the pig out of the way and leaned toward her.

“Don’t want much, sweetheart,” he murmured, smiling as she shivered against him. “Just a kiss. Can you give me that?”

Preparing for the rejection that he knew might be coming, Spike nearly sat up so she wouldn’t feel nervous. His eyes widened before closing when he felt her lips on his before he could even fully comprehend what was happening. Wrapping his arms around her waist, Spike nearly moaned as Buffy’s tongue gently caressed his before reaching up and grabbing the lapels of his duster, pulling him more forcefully toward her.

Letting his hands trail along her arms, Spike moved them higher until they threaded through her hair, holding her to him as he refused to let her get away.

Clutching at his duster, Buffy’s hands slowly loosened their grip, sliding beneath his coat and feeling the strong muscles of his chest, separated by the thin layer of fabric.

Pulling away after a moment, Spike took a deep breath as he closed his eyes, trying to control his raging emotions…and arousal.

“Something wrong?” Buffy asked nervously.

Hearing the tremor in her voice, Spike cupped her cheek in his hand, running his thumb along her skin as he shook his head. “No. I just don’t think you want to do this with your mum so close.”

Blushing at the mention of what almost happened, Buffy looked down at her lap, wondering what was happening between them.

“What is this, luv?”

Looking up in surprise that he had vocalized her thoughts, Buffy’s lips parted as she tried to think of an answer.

“I’m not trying to pressure you,” he said softly. “I’m just wondering.”

“I-I don’t know,” she whispered, glancing down at her comforter before looking up into his eyes again. “What do you want out of this?” she asked in uncertainty.

Hesitating for a moment, Spike met her gaze with his own. “A date,” he said with a smile.

“A date?” she replied, raising an eyebrow in question.

“You asked what I wanted…that’s what I want.”

“When?” she asked with a smile playing on her lips.

“Tomorrow night?” he asked, suddenly feeling like shy, little William again, waiting to be rejected when asking a girl on a date.

“That sounds great,” she replied with an easy smile. Seeing that he was nervous, Buffy leaned forward and brushed her lips against his in a tender kiss before pulling away with a soft smile. “Pick me up at seven?”

Deciding it would be better to leave on a high note before he shoved his foot in his mouth, Spike stood up, shoving his hands in his pockets as he nodded. “That sounds great, pet,” he said with a smile. “See you then.”
 

Chapter 23 – Pre-Date Jitters


Buffy spent the following evening getting ready for her date with Spike. She didn’t know why, but she kept having bouts of nervous jitters.

‘Hold it together, Summers,’ she thought as she began to curl her hair. ‘It’s not like you don’t know him…and that you haven’t kissed him before…fallen asleep in the same bed as him…had sex with him…’

“Everything alright?” Joyce asked as she watched Buffy from the doorway. Buffy nodded quickly and looked in the mirror in front of her. “So, are you officially dating Spike now?”

“I don’t know,” Buffy answered. “We haven’t really discussed it.”

“Well, I happen to think he’s a nice boy,” Joyce replied. “I’m not too keen on his nickname, but I suppose it fits his image a bit. Although, the rebellious thing is just a façade, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Buffy answered, smiling softly. “He’s a big fluffy puppy otherwise.” Joyce laughed quietly and sighed. “Is everything okay with you?”

“I’m fine,” Joyce said. “I’m just growing to realize that you’re an adult, sweetheart. You can make your own decisions and do whatever you’d like. I guess I’m beginning to feel old, is all.” Buffy smiled and looked at her mother.

“You may be old, but you haven’t aged a bit,” Buffy said, winking. Joyce came into the room and kissed her daughter’s forehead.

“Thank you,” she replied. “And I know I’m old, but I don’t want to be a grandmother just yet.” Buffy’s eyes widened before she giggled. “Buffy-”

“I don’t plan on having kids for a very long time,” she said, and Joyce smiled softly.

“Does Spike know that?” she asked, and Buffy made a face.

“Mom,” she said in a warning tone, and Joyce laughed.

“Just making sure,” she said, heading for the door. “I hope you have a good time tonight. It’s nice to see you be happy.” Buffy smiled as Joyce walked away before looking at a clock.

‘It’s six already?’ she thought, beginning to panic. ‘I’m not even close to being ready!’ She began to curl her hair as fast as she could, in the process burning one of her fingers on the metal barrel of the curling iron.

“Ouch!” she said quietly, looking at her finger. “Slow down, Buffy- tonight’s going to be fine. Stop obsessing over how you look. You could look absolutely hideous and it wouldn’t matter…probably.”

“Giving yourself a pep talk?” Joyce asked from the kitchen, hearing every word Buffy was saying.

“What? No,” Buffy said quickly before frowning. “Fine, you caught me. I’m wigging out over a date.”

“I wouldn’t worry, dear,” Joyce said. “It’s obvious he really likes you.” Buffy smiled as she looked in the mirror.

“Yeah, it is,” she said quietly before sighing.

* * * * *

On the other side of town, Spike was running gel through his hair as he looked into a mirror, trying to calm down both his unruly hair and his nerves.

‘I don’t understand why you’re so bloody anxious,’ he thought. ‘You like her, she likes you, and it’s not as if you two don’t each other.’ He grinned. ‘In the biblical sense of the word, even.’

Anne watched Spike in the bathroom as she stood in the hallway.

“You look nice, William,” she said. “I’m sure Buffy will appreciate all of the trouble you’re putting yourself through to smooth down those curls you dislike so much.” He shot his mom a look before sighing. “She likes you no matter how you look, dear.” He nodded and took a deep breath. “Although, I’m sure she’s obsessing over her appearance right now just as much as you are.”

“I don’t see why,” he replied. “She looks beautiful no matter what.”

“And you’re handsome no matter what,” Anne said. “Besides, I like your hair curly.”

“So does Buffy,” he said before frowning and beginning to tousle his hair a bit so it was back to its natural curly state. Anne smiled.

“Perfect,” she replied. “Now, where are you taking her?”

“I was thinking of taking her to that new Italian restaurant in town,” he said. “Italian food is romantic, right?”

“So you’re looking for romance?” Anne asked with a warm smile, and Spike shrugged. “You two make a very lovely couple.”

“I like to think so,” he replied. “Hopefully she agrees.”

“I’m sure she does,” Anne said before handing Spike money. He raised an eyebrow as he took it from her. “Make sure she has a nice time tonight.” He grinned.

“Thanks, Mum,” he said before giving her a hug.

“Whatever I can do to ensure you’ll stay with a girl who’ll tame your wild ways,” she said, winking at him before walking away. He smirked and put the money in his pocket.

‘I just want to make her happy,’ he thought. ‘And prove that this thing we have might be worthy of continuing.’

* * * * *

When both Buffy and Joyce heard a knock on their door, Buffy began taking several deep breaths, slightly settling her nerves. Spike appeared suddenly, holding two red roses. Buffy smiled as he handed one to her and then to Joyce. Joyce looked at it with a surprised expression.

“Thank you, Spike,” she said, giving him a warm smile. “That’s very sweet of you.”

“He’s a sweet guy,” Buffy said, smiling at him before giving her mom her rose. “Can you put this in a vase for me?”

“Sure,” Joyce said. “You two go out and have fun.” Spike smiled at Joyce before taking Buffy’s hand in his.

“I’ll be sure to have her home early,” he said, and Joyce laughed.

“Don’t worry about it,” she said, and Buffy raised an eyebrow. “Besides, it’s easier to get in the building when the sun is out.” Buffy giggled and led Spike to the door.

“Bye, Joyce,” he said, smiling at the older woman before the two teens left.

‘I wish my mom was as cool as I am,’ Joyce thought before sitting down on the couch and turning on the TV.

As soon as Buffy closed the door behind them, she leaned up to kiss his cheek.

“Thank you for the rose, Spike,” she said. “And for giving one to my mom. I can’t remember the last time she received a flower.” She paused and frowned jokingly. “Unless you’re trying to go for my mom instead, which just isn’t right. I’m not really a fan of the whole Mrs. Robinson thing.” He chuckled and kissed her temple.

“I’ll settle for the younger model,” he said before grinning at her. “Ready to go out, princess?”

“Ready for anything,” she answered, smirking.
 

Chapter 24 – Doing Things Right


Holding Spike’s hand as they walked out of the theater, Buffy looked down at their intertwined hands and smiled softly.

It was so simple.

How could something as effortless as touching another person in the least intimate place be so…intimate?

“What’s going through that mind of yours, pet?” Spike asked, tugging on her hand and pulling her close to kiss her temple.

“Lots of things,” she murmured, briefly closing her eyes as his lips made contact. “Wondering how we got here, for starters.”

“Yeah,” Spike agreed with a smile. “If somebody told me a week ago that I couldn’t live without you, I probably would have laughed in their face.”

Feeling Buffy stop, he turned to face her with a puzzled expression. His eyes widened a moment later when he realized what he said.

“Not that it would be such a bad thing,” he added quickly. “Not that it is, the laughing. I just meant-”

“You can’t live without me?” she asked softly, looking into his eyes with a surprised smile.

Letting his shoulders relax at the question, Spike shut his eyes in relief before opening them to see her standing in front of him expectantly. “You know I can’t,” he whispered, brushing the hair off her shoulders.

“Because I do your laundry and cook for you or because you want to be with me?” she asked skeptically.

“Because I want to be with you,” he said with a grin. “And let’s face it, pet, the laundry is a little lacking.”

Wincing when she smacked him on the shoulder, Spike chuckled after a moment, pulling on her hand. “Come on.”

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise.”

* * * * *

“Wow,” Buffy murmured, mesmerized by the sight before her. Leaning into Spike as they looked over the bluffs as the waves crashed along the beach, she relaxed against his chest, smiling when his arms wrapped around her waist. “This is amazing.”

“Glad you think so,” he said softly, brushing his lips over her neck.

Shivering in the warm night air, she sighed when he held her closer to him.

“How’d you find it?” she whispered, feeling soothed by the combination of his lips and the never-ending movement of the ocean.

“Used to come up here a lot,” he replied, resting his chin in the crook of her neck. “After my Da’ died.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, turning toward him as he offered her a grateful smile.

“It’s alright. I don’t want to say I’m over it, because I guess I never will be, but…it helped…coming here.”

“I get that,” she murmured, closing her eyes as she leaned into his chest. “Want to go for a walk?”

“Yeah,” he whispered, feeling himself getting choked up as he thought of his father. “Let’s go.”

Holding Buffy’s hand as they slowly made their way down to the beach, Spike admired the woman in front of him. How could he have thought she was anything other than amazing?

Slowly walking toward the water, each marveled how much they felt at home with the other.

Pulling Buffy down to the sand, Spike eagerly held her to him, kissing the top of her head as she rested against him. “So what happens now?” he asked softly.

“Any number of things,” she replied after a moment. “For example- we could go our separate ways.” Smiling when he tensed up behind her, Buffy continued, “Or there’s the ever-popular dating, and even though I might be a little partial, I think we’re doing a damn good job of it.” Glancing over her shoulder to look at him, she barely had a chance to see the smile on his face before his lips were brushing against hers in a tender kiss. “And that leads me to option number three,” she said, feeling a little out of breath. “We could spend months groping in the backseat of your car and making out whenever we get a chance.”

“Liking this plan,” Spike said with an obvious smile in his voice as he kissed along her neck and shoulder.

“Then you’ll love the next one,” Buffy said, turning around in his arms and straddling his waist. She shivered when he rested his hands on her hips. “Care to do this right, Mr. Lawson?”

“You’re serious?” he asked in disbelief.

“Well,” she replied, cocking her head to the side and looking up at the sky as if she was seriously considering it before turning her attention back to him. “As memorable as our first time was…I have the sudden urge to do it right.”

“I’m not exactly an expert, pet, but I thought we did it pretty right the first time,” Spike said with a smirk.

“Not interested?” Buffy asked, moving to stand up. “Alright…”

Trailing off with a squeal as she found herself laying on her back in the soft sand, she let her eyes close when she felt Spike’s body cover hers.

“Oh, I’m definitely interested,” he said with a growl in his voice.

Gasping when his hands moved along her body, slowly pulling off her clothes, Buffy pushed his duster down his arms, smiling when he shrugged it off and spread it out as a blanket, letting her lay back on it.

Shivering when the cool leather came in contact with her heated skin, Buffy eagerly tugged at his shirt, letting a purely feminine smile play on her lips when he nearly ripped it in his hurry to remove it, exposing the smooth muscles of his chest.

Crushing his mouth to hers, Spike felt his entire body tense as she pulled him on top of her, working on his belt buckle. Unable to wait for him to remove the rest of his clothes, she reached between them, positioning him at her entrance and trembling as he entered her with a slow thrust.

Dropping his head to her shoulder when their hips met, Spike closed his eyes at the sensations that were running through him. Pulling back to look into her eyes as their bodies slowly moved together, he gently caressed her cheek, letting a smile cross his face as she gasped when he rolled his hips against hers.

He wanted to say it. He wanted to tell her exactly what she meant to him…or what she could mean to him, but he couldn’t. He knew it was too soon for declarations of love, but he also knew that he was falling hard and fast.

Brushing his lips against hers and trying to convey his emotions through the simple act as her movements became more frantic, Spike felt relief course through him when she kissed him back with equal passion.

Never letting their lips separate when he felt her muscles begin to grasp his cock, Spike plunged into her. Swallowing her cry of pleasure as he pushed her over the edge, he quickly followed, squeezing his eyes shut when his own climax overwhelmed him.

Catching himself from falling forward onto her, he rolled them until they were lying face to face. Caressing her cheek with one hand, they continued the soft kisses until they had to pull away breathlessly. Looking into her eyes, he could feel the words practically choking him, but he couldn’t bring himself to say them out loud. Not yet.

Seeing the confusion and indecision on his face, Buffy smiled as she reached for his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I know.”

 

Chapter 25 – Love Doesn’t Cost a Thing… Sometimes


Five Years Later


“I love you, Mr. Lawson,” Buffy said as she looked at the man sitting beside her. He leaned over and gave her a gentle kiss.

“I love you, too, Mrs. Lawson,” he replied, grinning at her. “I can’t believe we just got married.” She nodded, smiling. “Can’t say I ever thought I’d see the day when you’d walk down an aisle to me, practically glowing in a virginal white dress.” He leaned over to her ear to whisper, “Although, you’re definitely not a virgin.” She laughed and smiled as she sipped some champagne before looking at the people sitting down at circular tables in the large room, all eating their dinners. “I’m happy the wedding went off without a hitch.”

“And the reception seems to be fairing nicely, too,” she added, looking down at her meal. “I’m still too excited to eat.” He chuckled quietly and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“I am,” he replied. “But not for food.” She looked at him as he wiggled his eyebrows, smirking. She playfully slapped his arm. “Hey! That’s spousal abuse now, pet.” She giggled and kissed him.

“I’ll quench your hunger, but not right now,” she replied. “We’ve got an awesome honeymoon suite waiting for us after this is over.”

“So I have to wait until sometime after midnight?” he asked, pouting when she nodded. “Fine, I’ll wait, but you owe me.”

“Oh, I think I can give you a pretty good reward for being patient,” she said, winking at him. Willow stood up beside her before going to grab a microphone. “Uh oh- I think she’s going to get speechy.”

“Everyone please quiet down,” Willow said, surprised when people almost immediately obeyed. She fought back a wave of nausea as she looked at everyone in the crowd, looking back at her.

‘You’re the maid of honor, Rosenberg- hold it together,’ she thought. ‘You can do this! You’ve been working on this speech for a very long time- don’t mess it up now.’

“Well, Buffy, Spike, you’re married now,” Willow said, smiling as everyone cheered and applauded. “I’ve been waiting for this day for years, and now that it’s here, it’s almost surreal. It almost feels as if I’ve married my sister off and gained a brother out of all of this.” Spike smiled at her, and Buffy began to tear up a little. “Well, before I get sappy or anything, I just want to remind everyone of how all of this began.” Spike leaned over to Buffy’s ear.

“She’s not going to recap all of our history, is she?” he asked quietly, and Buffy frowned.

“Why? Have a problem with that?” she asked, sniffling, and Spike saw a tear escape her eye, despite the smile she was sporting. He kissed her softly and wiped off her cheek.

“Not at all,” he replied before focusing on Willow again.

“I remember the first day Buffy met Spike,” Willow said, laughing. “More specifically, I remember all of the negative comments Buffy made about him.” Spike chuckled and wrapped his arm more tightly around his wife. “Not surprisingly, the two didn’t get along for quite some time. Not until a certain auction.” Buffy giggled as several of their friends in the audience laughed. “Now, I know I personally was surprised when Spike won Buffy as his slave for a week, and imagine my surprise when I heard how much he bid.”

“It was well worth it,” Spike said quietly, and Buffy smiled.

“A small price to pay to fall in love, eh?” she joked, and he kissed her temple.

“I remember thinking that the two would spend the entire week fighting and that some blood would be spilled, but apparently, that wasn’t entirely the case,” Willow continued. “And it was soon after that when their relationship became public.” Willow smiled as she looked at Buffy. “Aren’t you happy I convinced you to be a part of the auction?”

Buffy nodded vigorously, causing many people around her to laugh.

“When graduation rolled around, I admit I was skeptical of them lasting, but they both were determined to stick by one another. And two years ago, when you came home to our apartment and told me you were engaged to Spike, I can’t remember ever being happier in my entire life.” Willow paused and turned to look at Oz, sitting at the head table beside Spike. “Well, up until that point, at least. I think getting engaged myself trumped your engagement announcement.”

The newlyweds both laughed as Oz grinned at Willow.

“And now it’s your wedding day, you two. I’m not surprised that you decided to become his wife, Buffy, after doing his cooking and cleaning for a week as his slave.” Joyce and Anne laughed, sitting beside one another at a table in front of their children. “I can honestly say, from the bottom of my heart, that I’m abysmally happy for you both. You are perfect for one another, and I’m so grateful for you, Spike, because you’re making my surrogate sister obnoxiously happy.” Buffy cuddled into Spike’s side as she rested her head on his shoulder. “I love you both, and I wish you all of the luck in the world.” She held up her champagne flute, along with everyone else in the room. “Congratulations!”

Buffy and Spike kissed among applause before clinking their glasses together and drinking their champagne. Willow walked over to the table and hugged both of them.

“Excellent speech, Will,” Buffy said, and Spike nodded in agreement. “I can’t wait to give my speech at your wedding in a couple of months.”

“Going to make me cry?” Willow asked, and Buffy grinned.

“Just to return the favor,” she said. Spike stood up and extended a hand to Buffy as the first song of the night began to play.

“May I have this dance, Mrs. Lawson?” he asked, and she put her hand on his before getting up and letting him lead her to the dance-floor. He wrapped his arms around her waist while hers went around his neck. They ignored all of the camera flashes and voices around them as they locked eyes, smiling at one another. “I love you, Buffy. You’ve been the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

“Yeah, I think I was quite a steal for five hundred dollars,” she joked, leaning up to kiss him. “I love you, too, Master.”

“Save that for our honeymoon, princess,” he said, winking at her. “Thank you for all of this, luv.”

“Thanks belong to you, too,” she said, smiling softly. “Did you ever think we’d come this far?”

“Not in my wildest dreams,” he answered honestly. “But I’m so happy we did.”


THE END