*Heather Martin*

Disclaimer- I do NOT own Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This is a story with characters created by Joss Whedon. I am only borrowing them.

Spoilers- This will have many spoilers. It occurs after Wrecked, and will refer to everything before that also. But mostly, Fool for Love.

Summary- A spell has a far greater impact than Willow or Spike counted on. The vampire is split into two separate embodiments: the demon and William. But there’s still Spike, who has to decide who he really is, the demon or the man. And time is running out.

“Poor Spikey! Can’t be a human, can’t be a vampire.” ~Wrecked

But what if he had a choice?

Thanks everybody for the reviews. I love them! Makes me feel all warm and gooey inside.

Spike slept until morning. When he awoke, he found that there was no one in the house except himself and William.

“Willow took off for class, and Xander picked Little Bit up for school,” William told the vampire.

Spike detested the fact that William was using his nick-name for Dawn. The human was trying to steal his girls from him.

“Where is Buffy?” Spike questioned.

William shrugged. “I haven’t seen her since yesterday.”

Worry collected inside Spike. Buffy hadn’t come home from patrol. That meant something bad had happened.

The phone rang. Both men stared at each other.

William stepped toward the kitchen. “I’ll see who it is.” He couldn’t wait to talk on the new device.

Spike rushed after him. “Hey now, what gives you the right to. . .?”

He wasn’t fast enough. William had gotten to the telephone. He picked it up, placing it to his ear. “Hello?” He smiled with pride. He’d done it just like Dawn had when she received a call from a friend.

“Who is this?” a voice inquired on the other line.

“William. Are you wanting to speak to one of the residents at the Summers home?” he replied.

“William?” Is that you, Spike?”

“No, but he’s here.”

“What do you mean he’s here?”

“Spike is standing next to me.”

Spike had had it. He snatched the phone away. “Give me that!” he shouted.

The vampire demanded to the receiver,” What do you bloody want?”

“Spike,” the man growled.

“Peaches,” he said with just as much loathing.

“What are you doing there? If you laid one hand on Buffy. . .”

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist, Angelus, I haven’t hurt the slayer. Now, if I laid a hand on her is another matter.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Angel hissed.

Spike grinned. “Let’s just say Buffy and I have. . . Gotten rather close.”

“I know I should have come there. But I thought about what happened last time and decided against it.”

“Look, it’s Buffy’s bleeding life, if she wants to spend it with me that’s her business.”

Spike could hear Angel breathing hard out of anger.

“Let me talk to her!” Angel yelled.

Sudden seriousness crept over Spike. “I would, but she isn’t here. She didn’t come home last night.”

“She didn’t come home? Great, that means she’s already been captured.”

Spike clutched the phone tighter. “Captured?” he whispered.

“Cordy had a vision. Buffy was in some sort of warehouse.”

“Is that all you know?”

“Well, we think a vampire captured. Cordy saw a glimpse of Buffy being bitten.”

“Right then. I’ll go save her.” Spike hung up the phone, not caring if it was abrupt.

He ran over to the door. As he did, he was greeted by Mr.Sunshine streaming through the window. He hollered as his hand began to smoke. Moving away, it stopped.

“Bloody hell!” He kicked the wall in frustration.

Ok, he had forgotten what time it was. He scanned the room, searching for a blanket. There was none in sight, but he found his duster hanging up. He took it, and draped it over his head.

“What are you doing?” William questioned, from behind him.

Spike’s hand hovered over the doorknob. “Going to save Buffy, that’s what.”

William shook his head. “You’re an idiot. It’s day out. You’ll fry.”

“I don’t give a fuck. I let her down once, I can’t do that again.”

“So, what are you going to do? Wander around, burning up little by little, until you explode?”

Spike turned around. He removed his leather coat. “That’s right, you wanker, that’s exactly what I’m going to do. I’m not a ponce like you, I don’t back away just because there’s danger.”

William glared. “I’ve never been exposed to real danger, but that doesn’t mean I’ll walk away. Especially when it involves someone I love.”

Spike froze. “You love her?”

“Yeah, I love her. And I know you do too. So, let me go after her. I have a better chance.”

“You are going to get ripped to shreds!” Spike exclaimed.

“Maybe, but at least I’ll make it to the target without turning to dust.”

And it hit Spike, William was right. A lone tear escaped his eye. Buffy needed him and he was helpless.

Spike raised his head. He stared at William, really seeing him. His own crystal blue eyes were gazing back at him. Not a weak nancy-boy, but a confident and determined man. That was him. They were each other. Spike knew what he had to do.

“I think I’m ready, mate,” Spike declared.

“I’ve been ready,” William said.

They inched forward, closing the space between them. Then they collided.

+++++++++

Buffy awoke. It was dark. Her slayer eyes adjusted fast, her pupils letting in as much light as possible.

She tried to move her arms, but found that they were held by something. She heard clanking. Her eyes were brought up and she made out chains. Fabulous, she thought.

“I’ve been waiting for you to wake up, my dear,” the demon’s voice said. He stepped into her view. His eyes glowed in the blackness.

Buffy backed as far as she could against the wall. His cold fingers brushed away her hair. He touched the said of her throat, stroking it.

+++++++++

Spike howled as he merged with his other self. A burst of light was all he could see. Then flashes of memory hit him.

He saw Cicely. “I’m beneath you.”

Then Drusilla turned him.

He watched as he killed the slayer during The Boxer Rebellion. And he felt remorse. In all these years, he finally felt something about that.

Then he killed the other slayer on the subway.

He crashed into Sunnydale. He promised Dru that they would dance on the slayer’s grave.

Drusilla left him.

He saw Buffy. He remembered every single moment with her. Why he had fallen in love made sense. She was his sunshine.

Buffy jumped. He wasn’t strong enough.

She came back.

The spell split him up. Buffy told him she cared. She was captured. He merged with William.

His eyes shot open. He fell forward, sucking in air. The oxygen didn’t seem enough somehow.

Soon, he was under control. His hand came up, feeling his chest. It was there. Thump. Thump. Thump.

Spike’s eyes widened. Bloody hell, he had a beating heart.

Buffy tried to get him off her, but she was backed into the wall. The demon’s body was pressed against her, preventing any movement. He was strong. She didn’t remember Spike being this strong.

“I’ve always wanted to do this. But everytime I passed the idea to Spike’s consciousness, he buried it.”

Buffy squirmed as he lowered to her neck. He kissed the mark left by Angel, the master, and Dracula. Then he bit down.

+++++++++

Spike, who was now made up of William, ran to the cemetery. He came to his crypt, and went over to the side of it. There, propped against the structure, was his motorcycle. He hopped on.

The engine roared as he drove away. A wave of uneasiness swept over him. He hadn’t seen direct sunlight in 122 years. But William had. The two memories clouded together, creating a muddled chaos.

Spike knew exactly where the demon took his slayer. The same warehouse he and Dru had occupied. It was almost as if he wanted Spike to find him.

He parked the motorcycle near the entrance. Then he rushed inside.

His intuition was right, they were there. Buffy was chained to the wall. Flashbacks of when he had declared his love came back. Then it had seemed right. Now, the act enraged him. And the fact that the demon was draining her, made him explode. He grabbed hold of the oblivious demon’s shoulders, and pried him off.

The demon faced him. He wiped a stain of red liquid trickling down his chin. He grinned. “I’ve been expecting you, Spike. Not so soon, though. I didn’t get to finish my birth.”

Spike looked toward Buffy. Her head slumped limply. The distraction gave the demon an opportunity to knock him to the ground.

“I’ll just have to finish turning her later,” the demon informed.

Spike jumped to his feet. Snarling, he rammed into his former dark nature.

A laugh escaped the demon. “I can smell humanity all over you. Should I be calling you William?”

Spike smirked. “Doesn’t matter, mate, since I can kill you now. And the fancy part is if you kill me, you kill yourself. So, why don’t you just give up?”

The demon was in hysterics now. “Don’t think so. I have a better plan. It isn’t too late, you can merge with me, and cast William out.”

Spike shook his head. “Nah, you hurt my slayer. You see I love her, and would never do that.”

“But don’t you see, Buffy will be ours eternally,” the demon commented.

Spike punched him. “I prefer her the way she is.”

The demon growled. He kicked Spike hard in the chest. “You are just an ignorant boy!”

Reaching into his duster, Spike pulled out a stake. He raised it, pointing the wood at his opponent.

“Go ahead and try,” the demon provoked.

Spike thrust the weapon at his heart. The demon grabbed his arm, trying to get the stake out of his finger with his other hand. Spike head-butted him. Then he kicked.

“I may be human, but I can still kick your lousy arse!”

They fought for a long time. Neither were winning. It was an even match. But then the demon had to go and unbalance it by kicking Spike in the groin.

“Buggering fu. . .!” Spike yelled in pain.

The demon tore the stake out of his grasp. “I’m stronger than you. I always will be. Dark triumphs over light, there’s no changing it. So don’t try. Just surrender to me.”

Spike was breathing hard. All his energy drained away. Everything stopped at that moment.

Then it happened. The demon hadn’t noticed that he was near the wall, or that Buffy had awoke. She rose her legs up, bringing them into his back. He fell forward, stake clattering to the ground.

Spike dove for the stick. He managed to retrieve it. “Thanks, luv,” he thanked her.

She smiled. “No problem. Just hurry up. I’m sore and stuff. I want down.”

He smiled back at her.

Spike pounced on the demon. The stake fell right above his heart. One easy motion, and poof.

“You can’t do it,” the demon stated.

“Why not?” Spike spat.

The demon grinned. He licked his fangs. “I’m part of you whether you like it or not. You’re nothing without me. I make you whole.”

Spike couldn’t move. He was in a trance by the words.

“Don’t deny your own existence,” the demon went on.

Spike moved the stake away. He dropped it to the floor.

“Spike, what are you doing?” Buffy asked. Her voice wavered. She sounded tired, weak, and scared.

Spike looked over. Sadness adorned his eyes. “Sorry, pet, he’s right.”

She violently shook her head. “No! You are good. You’ve changed.”

“I may do good things but darkness will always haunt my depths. This is what is meant to be.”

Tears fell down her cheeks. “I love you,” she choked.

His gaze was tender. “Do you love me or William?”

There was a long pause. Spike thought she wasn’t going to answer, but then she did. “I love ‘you’. Whoever that is.”

He could feel his heart pound. God, he was going miss that. Soon he would be cold and still once more. Back to drinking cow’s blood.

“Love you too, Buffy. Always.”

With that, Spike met the demon’s eyes. “Let’s get this over with.”

+++++++++

Buffy was blinded by a bright light. She shut her eyes tightly.

A heaviness fell over her chest. She had wanted a normal life with Spike. That was why she had urged him to merge with William. But the truth was that Spike was both the demon and the human. He was an equal coin. You couldn’t have one without the other.

Things quieted. Buffy opened her eyes. She saw Spike lying on the ground. No one else was there, so he must be whole.

“Spike!?” she called out to him.

Willow arrived home to find it empty. Normally it would be natural, but where could William and Spike have gone? Buffy might have taken William out. Spike, however, was not doing so well the last time she saw him. He was in no condition to leave.

The phone rang. Willow quickly answered it. “Summers residence,” she said.

“Willow?”

Surprise came over her. “Angel, is that you?”

“Yeah. Is Buffy there?”

“Sorry, no. Everybody is gone.”

“Fabulous. Spike must have went after her.” There was a pause. “Unless he was lying and still wants to kill her. He might have. . .”

“He was telling the truth,” Willow defended her sort-of-friend. “He has a chip now, can’t hurt anybody.”

“I would ask more questions, but time is at stake here.”

“Ok. How do you know Buffy is in danger?”

“Cordelia saw Buffy in a vision. She was in a warehouse with some vampire. I called to tell you guys, but Spike was the only one there. He went off to be the hero. But that was hours ago,” he told her.

“This doesn’t sound good. I better get the others and search for them. William is missing too.”

“What is it with this William? He picked up before. I was sure it was Spike.”

“Um, that’s a long story.”

“You don’t have time to tell it.”

“Where is the location of this warehouse?”
 

He sighed. “I don’t know.”

“I guess we’ll start with all the ones we know of.”

“Sounds like the best plan. Keep me posted.”

“Bye, Angel.”

Willow hung up. Then she raised the phone again to dial Xander’s number.

+++++++++

Spike moaned. He groggily sat up. A pounding headache split through his temple. He felt like hell.

“Spike!”

His head tilted to Buffy. “Are you okay?” he choked.

“Yeah, peachy.” She laughed. Then she became serious. “I didn’t lose much.”

He stumbled to his feet, and came near. He examined the wound. It was already healing slightly, to his relief. He reached up, fumbling with the chains. Being released, she fell into his arms. He held her to him. The feel of her was pure ecstasy at that moment.

She cried. Stroking her hair, he murmured, “There, pet, everythings all right.”

Her hand ran up and down his chest. Water still stung her vision. Her hand suddenly stilled.

Buffy met his eyes. Hers were filled with wonderment. “Spike, your heart is beating.”

For a long time he couldn’t react. His brain wouldn’t process the information.

Buffy touched his face. “You’re warm,” she observed.

Spike drew away. He shook his head. “This shouldn’t be bloody happening!”

She seemed confused.

“I . . . I can feel the demon in me, it’s there. I should be a blood-sucking fiend.” He sat down on the floor. His head settled in his hands. “It should have gone away.”

Buffy knelt, wrapping her arms around him. He was trembling.

“I don’t know how to be a human, Buffy,” he confessed.

She took a long breath. “We can learn. . . Together.”

++++++++

The gang found Spike’s motorcycle outside. They barged in, finding the couple in an embrace.

“What the hell happened here?” Xander asked. He glared at Spike.

Willow showed great concern. “Buffy, are you all right?”

The questions bombarded her. She never moved. “I just want to go home,” she expressed.

Buffy helped Spike to stand. They began to walk toward the door.

“Let’s let them go home and boink. We can do the same, Xander,” Anya commented. She grinned at her fiancé.

“An! I don’t think they’re. . .” He frowned. “I hope they aren’t.”

Spike shielded his eyes from the glare. Then he cautiously looked upward. The sky was partly-sunny overhead. He stared in awe.

Their friends arrived behind them. They gaped at the scene.

“Why isn’t dead-boy burning up?” Xander wanted to know.

Buffy’s fingers interlocked with Spike’s. “We’re not sure exactly.”

“What happened in there?” Willow inquired.

“We’ll tell you at my house.”

++++++++

It took a while for the scoobies to absorb what happened. Willow took the position of finding out why Spike was a human, but with a demon. She felt like it was her responsibility to do so, considering it was her fault that he had gotten into this mess.

And as she through Theories of the Udead, it all made sense.

“I think I know what happened,” she said.

Buffy and Spike raised their heads. They were at the magic shop, one day after the ordeal.

“Explain away,” Buffy told her.

Spike nodded in agreement.

Willow became excited. “Vampires are humans controlled by a demon. The demon takes over, dominating the actions.”

Spike was skeptical. “Are you saying us vamps have souls?”

The red-head bit her lip. “Yeah. But it is hidden, unable to effect the personality.”

“How do you know this is right, Red?”

She shrugged, and then laughed. I don’t.”

“Got to say, it sound reasonable,” Buffy commented.

Spike raised an eye-brow. “What about Angel?”

“Think about it. The curse brought his soul to the surface,” Willow replied.

A smirk came to Spike’s lips. “This is actually beginning to convince me.”

“Listen, Spike, you were different. The chip evened out your halfs, human and demon. Your human side, William, played as much a role as your demon.”

“What about now?”

Willow smiled. “Your human dominates.”

He had been afraid of that. “So, am I a big poofter afterall?”

Buffy touched his knee. “You’re still bad, the demons there. You are just not the ‘Big’ bad, cuz you are ‘mostly’ good.”

Spike groaned. “That’s bloody great, slayer.”

“But it is. Think of how much more time we can spend together now. We have a twenty-four hours schedule.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle at that.

+++++++

Spike had finished it. And he was scared. What if she laughed right in his face? What if she lied and said it was good, when it was rot?

Okay, he had to go through with this. Something inside him said he had to. Damn it, if it was his soul talking. . .

Spike led Buffy to the couch. She sat next to him, looking expectantly at him.

His hand shook and he drew out the piece of paper from his duster. “I uh. . . I um, wrote you something.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. Then they were normal again, but with extra sparkle. She took the paper.

“They’re only words pet, if they aren’t good. . .”

She shushed him, and read his poem.

I was lost in the shadows

Whole, but knew not what I am

I searched, but the path was unclear

But then you came

Your sunshine lit my way

You make me who I am

Buffy his gaze. He was waiting nervously for her reaction.

The work wasn’t a masterpiece. But it squeezed her heart just the same. The words expressed his feelings for her.

Her voice was soft. “I feel the same way.”

He let out a sigh of relief. A smile crept to his mouth.

“Are you sure you aren’t becoming a poofter?” she teased.

He grinned. He growled, swooping her into his arms. “I still have the demon in me.”

She giggled. “Really?”

“Yeh. Need proof?”

“Most definitely,” she stated.

Spike carried his slayer upstairs, to show her just how evil he could be.

The End

Buffy giggled as Spike threw her on the bed. He followed, jumping ontop of her. His hands pinned down her arms above her head. He ravaged her with rough kisses. His tongue forced inside her mouth. Her own met it, swirling in a dance. A soft moan escaped her.

He trailed his kisses down her neck. His hands ran up and down her front, heading underneath her shirt. Soon the pink top covering her was removed. Warm flawless skin was revealed, and to his delight two perfect mounds. He rose an eyebrow at the fact that she hadn’t been wearing a bra. She only smiled in return.

Buffy jerked his shirt off him. It flung to the floor. Tight abs adorned his chest. Her fingers graced them, reveling the touch.

Spike leaned down and snatched her nipple. He sucked the puckered tip. Then his tongue licked the pink circle that was located on her breast.

She lifted her head up to the ceiling. She combed through his peroxide locks. She couldn’t bare it anymore. She slid off her pants and panties in a hurry. Her hand traveled to his belt-buckle. She fumbled with it with difficulty.

“Let me help you with that, luv,” Spike muttered. He undid his black jeans, and exposed his long member. Buffy took it into her mouth. He shivered as she sucked.

Soon, Spike returned her favor by slipping two fingers into her. He proked and prodded. Her body trembled, feeling light headed with bliss. He took out his fingers, and nipped between her thighs.

Spike met her eyes. They stared at each other with such love. He had waited for this moment, when she would return that, and here it was. The world could come crashing down and he would still be in ecstasy.

“I love you, Buffy,” he whispered.

She smiled. “I love you too,” she replied. She grabbed his ass, pinching it. He growled. He bit down on her neck with blunt teeth.

They rolled, kissing, in a circle. They ended up in the position they started with.

Just then the phone rang. They shared a look.

“Ignore it,” Spike begged.

“It might be important. Another apocalypse?” she said.

He groaned.

Buffy reached for the phone. “Hello?” There was a pause. “Angel? Yes, I’m fine.”

Spike snatched the phone. “Hey, Peaches, no need to worry. I’m taking good care of her.”

He hung up the phone. Laughing exploded between them.

“So, where did we leave off?” Spike asked.

Spike entered her womb slowly. She opened up as wide as she could, helping him inside. She gasped at their ideal fit. This was how they were meant to be. Why hadn’t she seen it before?

She bucked against him. She let out a loud moan. They found a rhythm and went with it. Their bodies moved up and down with each other.

Buffy cried out as an orgasm came over her. “Oh God!”

He soon followed, screaming out her name.

They collapsed, exhausted.

“I was wrong, pet, I’m not whole with William and the demon.” He gazed into her eyes. “You make me complete.”

Buffy smiled, kissing him with sweetness.