La Quintrala

Chapter Eleven

The very next evening Buffy awaited her guest at the Magic Box. When she had arrived, Giles had made a double take at the puncture wounds on her neck but Buffy preempted his question rather bluntly.

"Giles, I know this bite mark disturbs you but if you want me to explain it, we're going to have to talk about my sex life, so-"

"No, no. That's quite alright," he interrupted quickly as Buffy had expected. "The less I know about that, the better. I trust you Buffy and as the youth of Sunnydale is fond of saying, "'nuff said"."

Neruda strode in the shop at exactly the appointed time. Although Buffy's mind was hazy with thoughts of Spike, she could still appreciate the fine figure that the dark vampire cut. Along with his requisite black uniform he wore this time and elegant tan poncho with dark brown borders. The poncho was folded on the left side and thrown over the shoulder giving him a dashing, devil-may-care look.

"Buenas, señorita Summers."

"Hi Neruda. How have you been?"

"Good. And you?"

"Very good."

"Mmm. A certain Englishman must agree with you," he teased gently noticing the healed marks on her neck.

Buffy smiled warmly if a little embarrassed in his direction.

She gestured to the chair beside her. "Have a seat."

"Thank you."

Before taking the proffered chair he removed his poncho and in a few practiced movements had neatly folded it into one long narrow band.

"You know," he said conversationally, whipping the garment over his shoulder, "you can tell your friends to come out of their hiding places. I won't bite, in a manner of speaking."

Buffy bit back a laugh out of respect to her friends.

"Guys! He knows you're here. Come on out."

Gingerly, Giles, Anya, Tara, Willow and Xander stepped out of the shadows. The Hispanic vampire chuckled and addressed them all.

"You needn't worry, but it is only right that you do."

Giles mulled it over and decided to give them the privacy Neruda wanted, so he and the others went to wait at the front of the store. Neruda then sat next to the Slayer.

"I must assume that Spike is taking care of Juan Estenislao and Kataix?"

Buffy nodded.

"Should I worry?" she asked him point blank.

"Yes."

He was being brutally honest and she respected him for it. He looked straight into her eyes as he spoke.

"Juan Estenislao is a monster in human disguise. A very, very evil man. He will do anything and everything to acquire more power. As for Kataix, he is unpredictable at best. I cannot tell what the outcome will be, but I have great faith in your man."

Buffy stared at his dark brown eyes and saw the warmth and friendliness that Spike had immediately recognized in him.

"What's on your mind Neruda?"

"Death. Many deaths. Too many deaths."

"Okay, turning cryptic on me. What do you mean exactly?"

"I don't have prophetic dreams like you, but I sense things. All situations have a feel to them and this one is ominous."

"Ominous for who?"

"That I do not know."

"I'm sorry, I don't understand. Why are you telling me this?"

"I just thought you should know in case you have some unfinished business."

"Unfinished?" wondered aloud Buffy until realization sunk in. "You want me to put my house in order in case I die?"

Neruda cocked his head to the side and nodded gently.

"But there's nothing I need to straighten out. I haven't been this well grounded since, well, ever."

"Are you sure? What about Spike?"

"What about him?"

"What if he's the one to die?"

All colour drained from Buffy's face.

"Don't even say a thing like that. That's not an option. I just got him, I'm not letting him go until *I* die. Not the other way around," she said grinding her teeth. "Never the other way around," she added softly, her voice laden with emotion.

Neruda regarded her with great tenderness. "Buffy, I'm not saying this to hurt you. I have lived a long time, and some of the saddest things I've seen were people dying their hearts or conscience heavy with unsaid things, deeds undone."

"I'm not hiding anything for God's sake," Buffy cried exasperated.

"I'm sure you're not but does Spike know that?"

"Know what?"

"That you're not holding anything back from him."

"He knows he means everything to me. He's the one."

Neruda eyes widened and he looked at her meaningfully. Buffy stared back at him unsure, when the truth suddenly revealed itself to her. She took a deep breath and nodded.

"Don't worry Neruda. I will put my house in order."

"I am most pleased," the vampire declared. "That being cleared up, I wish you a good evening."

Buffy found herself not wanting to see him go right away. He was so pleasant and always had interesting things to say.

"Uh, won't you have some, uh, tea…or something?"

Neruda smiled broadly. "Tea would be lovely, if it isn't too much trouble."

"No, no trouble at all. Do you mind if the others join us?"

The vampire shook his head. "Not at all."

Buffy smiled and went to get her friends.

At first a little reluctant, the Scoobies quickly warmed up to Neruda. They had countless questions for him and he answered each one patiently and with much humor. Giles and he were the only ones drinking tea while the young people had opted for coffee. Anya had rushed off to get pastries for everyone and Neruda thanked her profusely for her kindness. Unused to be fussed over by anyone but Xander, Anya blushed and half hid her face on her fiancé's shoulder. Xander smiled at her and mouthed "Thank you" in Neruda's direction. The vampire said he had to wash his hands. When he walked past the engaged couple he bent down and murmured.

"This one, is a rough diamond. Time will do the rest. You are a lucky man."

Stunned, Xander didn't even have time to agree with him because the vampire had moved on. Anya was near tears and everyone was staring.

"Pre-wedding jitters," joked Xander before Anya grabbed his face and kissed him deeply.

There was some slight embarrassment as the others looked at the ceiling or the floor.

"Oh, you can look now," laughed Anya to everyone's relief.

An hour or so later, Neruda had to leave and the others decided to do the same. Hanging back, he bade Anya and Xander good night. He took the opportunity while Buffy spoke with Tara and Willow to have a word with Giles.

"You have done a terrific job with Buffy," the vampire commented.

The Watcher shrugged. "She's a natural. Best Slayer I've ever seen."

"I meant the person she is."

Giles didn't expect that at all.

"I can't take credit for that. Her mother was the one."

"A child needs both mother and father," Neruda reasoned.

Giles became a little uncomfortable. "I'm, I'm not her father."

"You are. Don't doubt it."

Giles suddenly had the intense need to wipe his glasses. Neruda chuckled and walked toward Buffy and her remaining friends.

"We're on to you," grinned Willow.

"How so?" he demanded.

"You're making everyone feel good."

Neruda looked very amused. "And that is…bad?" he inquired.

"No, just wondering as to why."

"Tomorrow is unpredictable."

"That's your answer?"

Neruda nodded. "The Slayer understands."

Willow and Tara looked at Buffy.

"Later," she said.

"Okay, well, we're going to go. Nice seeing you Neruda."

"Ladies," he said jovially, "the pleasure was all mine. Under different circumstances, I would seek the pleasure of your company again."

The girls headed for the door but Willow stopped shy of opening it.

"So, don't we get any pearls of wisdom or compliments?" Willow asked only half in jest.

"You two don't need any," the dark vampire stated.

"Huh?"

"That was a compliment honey," Tara informed her trying not to laugh at Willow's bewildered expression.

Neruda laughed with Buffy and the witches exited the shop.

"I really have to go patrol," the Slayer told Neruda.

"And I must get back home."

"I can walk with you to your car if you like," offered Buffy but Neruda shook his head.

"Too risky. We can't be seen together."

Buffy sighed. "I keep forgetting you're one of the bad guys."

"In the end, I will be," he reminded her gently.

Buffy touched his arm comfortingly. "I have to go. Good night Neruda."

The vampire smiled tenderly as he watched her go. "Buenas noches angelito."

In Los Angeles Spike and Wesley waited patiently at the bus depot for Juan Estenislao to arrive while Cordelia took a few calls on her cell phone. Spike had slept till midday and had conferred for the rest of the afternoon with Wesley, preparing everything for the spells to work without a hitch. The other team also waited for nightfall as the previous evening had proved fruitless for kidnappings and sacrificing. They were hoping that tonight would be different. Angel had popped in to see how things were progressing. The vampires had glared and growled at one another but had kept the peace for which Wesley was grateful.

"You know," observed Wesley when Angel left, "if I didn't know any better, I'd think you two were alpha males fighting over a prized female."

Startled, Spike's head whipped round but Wesley was too engrossed in his preparations to notice the vampire's relief when he realized that Wesley knew nothing.

"Just a lot of bad history," offered Spike as an explanation.

Wesley nodded but didn't comment.

In the evening the two teams went their separate ways wishing each other good luck. Cordelia was feeling better so she joined Wesley's team. And that is how the three of them found themselves at the bus depot. While Spike smoked, Wesley scanned the area and Cordelia complained about the weather, which was uncharacteristically on the chilly side. The men ignored her rants. One because he was concentrating on the mission at hand, the other because happy thoughts of a blonde dynamite of a girl pervaded his mind.

Exasperated with their lack of sympathy, Cordelia excused herself and went to the restroom. When she returned several minutes later, she found Spike and Wesley doubled over laughing. Her curiosity was not to be satisfied however because to her left appeared Juan Estenislao. Scurrying toward the men she shouted to get their attention. Wesley and Spike immediately sobered up.

Cordelia stayed behind while the vampire and the ex-Watcher sidled up to Estenislao and steered him toward an empty alley. Wesley was already reciting the Latin words of the spell while Spike prevented the warlock from bolting. Humiliated at being caught so easily, Estenislao used his enhanced powers and sent Spike and Wesley flying through the air and into a concrete wall. Wesley had the air knocked out of him and Spike felt blood trickle down his neck. Now he was annoyed. He helped Wesley to his feet and told him to hurry with the spell. The warlock laughed at both men even as he felt the power of Wesley's magic draining the essence of Kataix out of him.

"Pobre infeliz, no arriesguez tu vida conmigo (Poor fool, don't risk your like with me)," Estenislao told Spike who once again was restraining him despite the pain it was causing him.

"Listen mate," Spike told him through gritted teeth. "I don't understand a damn thing you're saying, but this is your last stop. No Sunnydale for you."

"Vete vampiro o tendras que enfrentarte a la furia de mi dueño (Go away vampire or you'll have to deal with my master's fury)."

"Uh, Wesley? Is any of that important?"

The Englishman spoke the last words of the spell.

"He's just warning you. Pay no attention to him. What we have to worry about is Kataix."

"Love the way you say "we"," Spike dryly observed.

Juan Estenislao suddenly slumped to the side when Wesley served him a powerful blow to the side of his face. A white figure with light orange lines across its body emerged from the unconscious form on the ground. Kataix was of average height. His body had a human form but the head was oddly shaped like a hammer. He had neither ears nor nose. Two large black eyes and a small opening for a mouth dominated his face.

"That's Kataix?" said Spike who was about to make witty comment when he was cut off by Wesley who had just cast the second spell.

"No time for pleasantries Spike, throw the damn balls!"

"Right."

On cue, Cordelia who had watched closely the proceedings tossed a bag to the vampire. Reaching into it he took out a ball of clay and threw it at Kataix.

"Hey, Hammerhead! This way!"

The ancient spirit moved its strange head and looked through Spike.

"Selk'nam?" he wondered aloud in a cavernous voice as he considered the woman before him. He hesitated slightly knowing that the Selk'nam, his first people, had been whispers in the wind for almost a century. Seeing his uncertainty, Spike wasted no time in wondering how well the spell was working and simply threw a barrage of clay at the creature. Kataix' black eyes registered pure shock, then fury as he was forced to back away from the onslaught of clay being thrown at him.

"Wesley!" Spike cried nervously, "I sure hope that spell is holding up because I do not want to deal with this guy mano a mano, he looks mighty pissed!"

As the clay balls kept flying, Kataix roared his frustration, the sound shattering various windows and nearly making Spike, Wesley and Cordelia pass out from the pain to their eardrums. Frustrated by the inevitability of the situation, Kataix centered his anger on Juan Estenislao and with a simple move of his hand in the air snapped the warlock's neck making Cordelia and Wesley wince. But in the end, Kataix had no choice but to withdraw and disappear back into his dimension just as a clay ball hit him squarely between the eyes.

"Smashing!" cried Wesley enthusiastically. "So to speak," he added sheepishly when Spike threw him a weary look.

Tired but elated at their success, Wesley and Spike returned to the office having dropped off Cordelia at her apartment. Spike hadn't been effusive but he'd been sincere when he thanked her for all her help. Cordelia had nodded and told him he'd managed pretty well for a short, stout, half-clad woman. Leaving the vampire with his mouth hanging open and a chuckling Wesley, Cordelia waved and went into her building.

Spike turned to the human. "I thought you said the illusion would only be for Kataix' benefit?"

Wesley couldn't help but laugh. "Well, yes, but also to anyone else watching."

Spike shook his head as he drove on and thanked The Powers That Be that none of the Scoobies had been there to witness that.

The others were still away on the other case so only Wesley was there to see Spike off, which suited the vampire fine. Looking at Angel only reminded him that he probably came in first with Buffy. The thought filled him with loathing. No matter, she was his now. She'd proved it the other night when she asked him to mark her. These sullen thoughts were tossed aside when Wesley told him that he should stay an extra day, at least to recuperate from the cut to his head. Spike thanked him but dismissed the wound, saying that it was practically healed already. If he started to feel ill he'd rest at a motel on the way. The ex-Watcher noticed the vampire's impatience to leave and wondered what was so important for him in Sunnydale to want to get back to there so quickly but did not pry. Spike threw his bag in the back seat as well as a small cooler with a few bags of blood then turned to Wesley.

"I liked working with you," he said and nodded his head.

Wesley did the same. "Likewise. Good luck with the rest."

"No problem there, the Slayer's in charge," Spike replied getting behind the wheel.

Wesley smiled and tapped the roof of the DeSoto in a farewell sign. Watching the black car speed away Wesley was struck how the few words that had constituted Spike's compliment had touched him. He and Giles were going to have to have a conversation about the nature of vampires because so far there were two, and possibly three from what Spike had told him about Neruda, that were defying all that they had been taught by the Watcher's Council on vampires.

Chapter Twelve

In the end, despite his best intentions, Spike did have to stop at a motel. He was tired and the cut at the back of his head throbbed. He knew he could have taken Wesley's offer to stay another night but the less contact he had with Angel the better. Wearily he decided he'd sleep just a few hours and give the wound time to heal. Unfortunately, his neighbors had other ideas and were having a wild time. Annoyed, Spike thumped his fist on the wall and shouted a string of threats and obscenities. Don't make me go in vampface, he thought, because I will. Luckily, it seemed to have done the trick because they quieted down. Spike could still hear their low moans and the creaking of the mattress but that he could handle especially since he heard both parties reaching their climax. Oh, Buffy, he thought. What the hell am I doing here in a crummy motel with horny neighbors? The pain at the back of his head reminded him why. Soon after he was fast asleep.

When Spike awoke, what was supposed to have been a few hours of rest had turned into quite a few more. Dismayed, he saw that it was past noon. He had no choice; he'd have to wait `till sunset. On the bright side the wound was completely healed and he felt revitalized. His one and only thought was to get back to Buffy as soon as possible. The more he thought about her, the more restless he got. He started pacing then, watched TV willing the hours to go by. Bored but hungry, he drank the blood bags from the cooler. The cold pig's blood was distasteful but it stopped the rumbling in his stomach.

Finally the deadly rays of the sun disappeared over the horizon and after settling his bill Spike took off at top speed for Sunnydale. He stopped a couple of times along the way to call Buffy. Her joy at hearing from him and the longing in her voice made him feel loved and wanted. Her husky voice was also seriously turning him on. Spike banged his head against the pay phone and prayed that there would be no cops or traffic on his way.

As soon as Spike cleared the doorway of Buffy's house, she jumped in his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. The vampire dropped keys and bag and they started to kiss deeply, feverishly. They spoke between kisses as he walked them toward the stairs.

"I missed you so much," she said in his mouth as her fingers ran wildly through his hair.

"Love you baby, love you so goddamn much," he said, his tongue mating frenziedly with hers.

With the first step he climbed they both groaned at the added friction between their bodies.

"Fuck," he hissed.

Buffy was no help at all, laving his neck and ear with open mouth kisses. His vision swam momentarily and holding tightly her waist he thrust up instinctively. Buffy gasped and threw her head back. When he saw the look of pleasure on her face Spike lost all control. Climbing the rest of the stairs hurriedly, he burst into her room and let Buffy shut the door. They tumbled onto the bed fully clothed kissing with bruising intensity. They wrestled for a few minutes enjoying torturing each other by teasing their erogenous zones until the need became too great and clothes were hastily removed complicated only by the fact that they refused to stop kissing. There was some fumbling with the buttons of her shirt because both were shaking so badly from the strain but Buffy solved the problem by pulling it over her head. She wore no bra and Spike immediately latched on to one breast sucking hungrily. Their bodies were thrumming with desire.

"What took you so long?" she asked breathing heavily. "Last time you called you were supposed to be only a half hour away."

Spike pushed her back and settled over her.

"I had to swing by Giles' place," he explained, licking and kissing the hollow of her neck making her squirm under him.

"Why?"

"Wesley gave me a book for Giles," he mumbled, his tongue and hands worshipping her body on the way down.

"Couldn't that wait?" she finally managed to say as her own hands ran heatedly over his head and shoulders.

"No. Wesley was insistent that Giles get it as soon as possible."

He started lapping the heated flesh between her folds. Buffy shuddered and moaned.

"I've been going crazy since your call," she complained but there was no reproach in her voice.

"If it's any consolation baby, I was very rude to Giles," he said, savoring her essence.

"Why? Oh, God, that's good," she whimpered.

Spike smiled.

"I was in no mood to chit-chat with your Watcher. I've been hard since we talked on the phone."

To emphasize the point, he led her hand to his throbbing member. "You do this to me. All the time."

His words shot tremors through her. Using her Slayer strength she pulled him up and plunged her tongue in his mouth, devouring him, letting him know that he had the same effect on her. Spike moaned in her mouth continuously and she turned them over so that he lay beneath her now.

"Poor baby," she teased rubbing her breasts on his chest, "let's see what we can do for you," and promptly lowered herself and engulfed him in the warmth of her mouth.

Spike groaned loudly and the ache between Buffy's legs grew. He was in trouble. She felt too good and he'd been hungry for her for two days. He shut his eyes because the sight of Buffy going down on him was too much of a turn-on. He tried to think successively of different things to tamp down his desire but nothing seemed to work.

"Buffy, luv, please stop."

From the tone of his voice she knew he meant it so she stopped tormenting him and crawled up his body to kiss his mouth.

"Too much?" she inquired.

"You're too bloody good, that's the problem."

"What? Is it the way I lick the underside or when I suck and swirl my tongue around the head?" she asked innocently.

His cock twitched in reaction to her words.

"Are you trying to kill me?" he cried. "Now give me a minute okay?"

Spike resumed his mental list of things to take the edge off his need while she peppered his shoulder and neck with light kisses. He finally settled on two things that he definitely had no warm feelings for: the Initiative who had implanted his chip and Angel.

"There," he said triumphantly, "that did it."

Quickly he rolled them over and Buffy squealed with delight. Kissing her deeply he led his cock to her entrance and with a grunt gratefully sank in her depths. Buffy raised her legs to deepen the angle.

"Don't hold back Spike, I want you in the worst way."

"What a coincidence," he grinned and obliged thrusting faster.

"Harder," she panted.

Their eyes locked for an instant, each finding there the love, passion, longing and acceptance they craved from each other. She had missed him so much; she needed to feel closer to him. Placing a hand on his chest she told him to sit up. Loath as he was to break the rhythm, he did as she asked. Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. While she rode him, they kissed and Spike fondled her breasts. He loved this position because Buffy had to do all the work and all he had to do was to let it happen while he feasted on every part of her body that was available to him.

"Fucking, bleeding hell," Spike muttered all of a sudden when he felt himself tense up, but Buffy was already coming, slamming down hard on him. Satisfied that she had reached her climax, Spike was able to concentrate and enjoy his own. Buffy watched mesmerized as he closed his eyes and grimaced from the intense pleasure coursing through his body. Sated, he buried his head on her shoulder panting heavily. Buffy cradled him and caressed the back of his neck and for the briefest of moments, she wished that his seed could take root in her womb but the thought was soon banished along with the ones she used to cherish about a normal life.

After a second session of lovemaking Spike was kissing Buffy slowly when he remembered something and started to laugh. His mirth was infectious and it made Buffy giggle.

"What's so funny?" she asked as he rolled off of her.

"Guess who I met my second night in LA."

"I don't know…Whistler?" she ventured.

"Harmony," he said, laughing anew.

"Harmony? Oh my God. How did it go?"

"This happened at the bus depot. We were waiting for that warlock when she bumped into me. At first she was thrilled to see me but then she remembered how furious she was supposed to be so, looking pretty smug she backed away facing me, like she threatened she'd do, if you recall, and backed right into Wesley. It was priceless. She then had the choice between facing Wesley's ire and stake or spiting me. She opted to flee from Wesley and I got to see her lovely ass take off at top speed. I told Wesley about her promise to me and we laughed our heads off."

Buffy was in stitches imagining the scene.

"Not a bad sort Harmony but such a silly bint," Spike concluded.

"Why did you ever put up with her?" she wondered.

"I was horny and she was always willing."

"You are so crude," she complained with mock indignation.

"You asked and I'm telling," he replied chuckling.

"I don't know why I put up with you."

"Because you're horny and I'm-"

He never finished as Mr. Gordo was unceremoniously flung at his face.

The following evening Spike debriefed everyone on everything that had happened in L.A. repeating essentially the same story he had told Giles over the phone in the morning.

"So Spike, what did Angel have to say?" Xander asked innocently.

"Nothing. He mostly brooded because he wasn't allowed to kill me."

"No, I meant about you and Buffy. I find it interesting that he still hasn't been informed about Buffy's love life."

There was a pause and everyone turned with interest toward the vampire.

"He didn't mention it and I didn't bring it up."

"Why? You scared he's going to trounce you when he does find out?"

Buffy scowled at Xander but Spike was merely tired rather than angry.

"I didn't tell him," he began as if speaking to a child, "because that's up to Buffy. As for being trounced, why the hell wouldn't it be Angel that got trounced? Because he's bigger? I'd like to remind you that I've made it this far not by being a choir boy," he rose to leave. "You can hate me all you want Harris, but don't dismiss my capabilities, they might surprise you one day in a bad way."

"Is that a threat?" Xander scoffed.

"It's good advice boy."

Piqued Xander stood up and assumed a belligerent pose.

"Don't you ever call me that!"

"Grow up and I won't have to," retorted Spike visibly amused by the young man's bravado.

"Enough you two!" barked Giles exasperated. "Xander, sit down. Spike, why don't you go home."

Spike shrugged, leaned down and kissed Buffy lightly on the mouth.

"I'll see you later, luv."

Buffy smiled and gave his arm a squeeze. Spike had reached the door when he heard Giles call out to him:

"Spike, thank you for everything you've done."

"Yeah," the vampire acknowledged neutrally.

His face was impassible, but secretly he was pleased. The Slayer shot her Watcher a grateful look and the meeting resumed.

Spike didn't go home right away. He was feeling restless so instead he went to the Bronze for a drink. As luck would have it, it was Imported Beer Night so Spike treated himself to a Leffe. Sitting at the bar he savored the rich full-bodied taste of the Belgian beer trying to forget the ugly feeling that had settled in the pit of his stomach. The trip to Los Angeles and Xander's taunts had found echo in his heart giving strength to his insecurities. He sipped his beer slowly, trying to reason his discontent away but this time it didn't work. With a heavy heart he finished his beer and headed for Revello Drive.

Spike was so immersed in his thoughts that he didn't hear Buffy calling out to him until she was by his side. She grabbed his arm and kissed his cheek.

"Spike, are you deaf? I've been calling you from a block away."

"You did? Sorry luv, I'm a bit distracted is all."

"I thought you'd be home already," Buffy said linking her hand with his as they walked.

"Was going to, then decided to have an imported beer at the Bronze," he explained.

"How was it?"

"What?"

Buffy regarded him strangely. "The beer, how was the beer? Are you alright?"

"Fine. The beer was fine and I'm fine. What's with the Twenty Questions?" he asked irritated.

"Sorry, I didn't realize that asking my boyfriend if he enjoyed his beer and if he's feeling okay could be considered an interrogation," Buffy replied sarcastically, clearly annoyed with him. "I'll shut up now."

Spike sighed deeply. "Look, I'm sorry okay? Nothing's wrong. I'm just tired."

Buffy wasn't convinced but played along for now. "Okay. Let's just go home."

"Sounds good."

The rest of the walk was done in an awkward silence. Once they reached the driveway of the house, one of them had mentioned watching TV and they started bickering on what they should watch. When they had crossed the doorway the argument had escalated to the fact that they always did what she wanted whether he had other ideas or not.

Dawn had heard her sister and Spike's voices and came down to greet them when she realized that a storm was brewing on the horizon. Without a word she crept back upstairs. The last thing she needed was to get caught in the middle of something between an angry vampire and an equally pissed off Slayer.

Buffy had had enough of Spike's barrel of complaints.

"What's eating at you anyway? You've been jumpy and irritable ever since we got back from the Magic shop and I've just about had my fill. What the hell is going on?"

Spike's first reaction was to deny her allegations but he needed to know the truth and erase the dark ugly feeling that held his insides in knots. His fear of her answer made it difficult for him to formulate the question.

"You're thinking an awful lot about this Spike and it's making me nervous. What is it?"

Spike licked his lips and started pacing like a caged panther. Now Buffy was truly worried. Was he reconsidering their relationship? She couldn't bear it. She would not survive another abandonment.

"That idiot Xander made a point tonight. Why doesn't Angel know about us? If he knocked on your door this minute and told you that his soul was permanent, would you take him back?"

"What?" Buffy asked incredulously.

His question was so far removed from her worst fear that a wave of delirious happiness washed over her and she flopped backward unto the sofa. It also occurred to her that this was the perfect opportunity to clear up some things with Spike. Neruda had been right, these things have to be said and cannot wait.

"Well? Yes or no Slayer?"

With sudden speed she grabbed his hand and hauled him toward her so that he lay sprawled on the couch, his head in her lap. She held his face in her hands and stared into his eyes.

"I'm only going to say this once. Not because it pains me but because it's the truth and I don't need to go over something that is quite clear to me. You with me?"

Spike nodded.

"Okay, then pay attention. I was very much in love with Angel and I will always love him," she began and felt Spike's body stiffen with unbridled jealousy. Smiling, she went on, "but we lead different lives and we aren't the same people we used to be. I'm deeply, crazy in love with *you*. I *love* you. Spike, you're the one. Is it sinking in yet, or do you need more convincing?"

Spike's body relaxed and he was overcome with emotion.

"I think," he swallowed hard to keep his voice from cracking. "I think I need a little more convincing" he went on as he entwined his fingers in her golden locks, pulling her toward him.

"You mean like this?" she asked as she swooped down claiming his mouth with hers.

"Yeah, just like that," he sighed before pulling her down again for a languorous kiss that left them both on fire.

Slow, deep, wet kisses that seemed to go on forever and left her begging for more, how did Buffy ever get so lucky to have a man who actually liked long foreplays?

"I like the buildup," explained Spike between kisses.

"Oh God, was I actually talking out loud?"

"Yes and moaning pretty loud too," chuckled Spike as he maneuvered their bodies so that she lay beneath him. "And I'd like to keep it that way."

When the shouting had stopped, Dawn had slowly come down the stairs. She had taken a quick look into the living room and smiled when she saw the couple making out on the couch. Whatever was wrong they had worked it out. She didn't interrupt them knowing that they would eventually take it upstairs. This was a golden opportunity she suddenly realized and happily returned to her room to jump on the phone and have a long chat with her friends. For once, Buffy was too busy to tell her sister to get off the phone.

Chapter Thirteen

It had been decided the night before during the meeting at the Magic shop that they needed weapons if only to slow down La Quintrala's slaves at the final showdown. Xander and Spike were chosen to go retrieve what they needed at the army compound.

Shortly after sunset, Xander made his way to the Summers' home to pick up Spike who was already waiting for him outside. The two glared at each other but putting the mission first kept silent and got underway.

"Are you worried?" Willow asked as she and Buffy spied on the two men through the window.

"About what?"

"Xander and Spike without adult supervision?"

"They're just going to have to work it out," Buffy declared moving away from the window.

"I get the feeling that you're siding with Spike on this one."

"In all fairness Willow, Spike hasn't said one word to Xander. But Xander keeps pushing the limit. I don't know how much more Spike will endure but I can tell you that I will throttle Xander myself if he keeps this up."

"It's hard for him," tried to explain Willow.

"Why is it that Xander's feelings are more important than my feelings for Spike?"

"No, it's not like that. It's just that he worries about you. He's your friend."

"Then he should act like one. He should act like you."

Willow beamed happily. They were finally having that one on one girl talk they'd been promising each other forever. Tara had been very understanding of Willow's need to have this time with her best friend and had even encouraged it.

"Are you up for some ice cream?" Willow asked with all the seriousness that such a question required.

"Bring it on," answered Buffy gravely.

They ate in companionable silence from the same carton.

"So Buffy, how's Spike in bed?"

Buffy nearly choked on her spoonful.

"Willow!" she giggled.

"Well what? I'm curious."

Buffy hesitated only a second before grinning.

"He's fantastic. The sex is unbelievable," she gushed.

"Better than Angel or Riley?"

Now Buffy was laughing. It felt so good to be able to talk to someone about Spike and not feel judged. She looked around then scooted closer to Willow and said in a conspiratorial tone:

"This cannot get back to Spike. Ever."

Willow nodded vigorously.

"I've never felt this way before. Angel was wonderful and gentle but we only did it that one time so I can't say much more. Sex with Riley was nice and relaxing. I even told him that once but it lacked that passionate factor. I don't know, maybe it was because I wasn't very in love with him, but we never had that, you know, one look at each other and you want to tear each other's clothes off."

Willow nodded understanding completely.

"And, oh God. The way that man kisses," Buffy continued in a daydream. "We can't be in the same room without having some kind of contact. He's wild and fun. Spike leaves me breathless. I can't get enough of him and it turns my insides out when he acts like if he doesn't touch me soon he's going to die, -well, you know what I mean. I'm, I don't know what I am," she finished with a giddy smile.

"You're crazy about him."

"I am Willow, I am," Buffy admitted blushing.

"Oh Buffy, I'm so happy for you. But why wouldn't you want Spike to know that he's a stallion?"

Buffy was laughing hard now. When she started to calm down she explained:

"I would never hear the end of it. He'd never come down from that high!"

Thanks to Xander's residual military knowledge he and Spike were able to break in easily into the army compound.

"When did you pick up all this military know-how?" Spike asked, curious.

"Remember that Halloween when you tried to kill us?"

"You mean when Buffy was acting like a damsel in distress?"

Xander nodded.

"Hell yes I remember, nearly got her that time," the vampire said, smiling at the irony of how his existence had gone completely topsy-turvy from the moment he first laid eyes on the Slayer.

"Regretting not achieving your goal?"

"Don't be dense, man," retorted Spike.

"Anyway, a side effect of the spell was that I was left with a lot of military training."

"Must have bonded well with Commando Boy then," remarked Spike.

"Hey. Keep Riley out of this. He was a good man."

"If you say so."

"What do you know? He was good for Buffy."

"Oh, really? That's why he…" Spike grunted, exasperated with the human.

"Finish what you were going to say."

"Listen mate, I slipped okay? If Buffy has chosen not to speak of this with you, then so be it. Take it up with her."

"I will."

"Good."

"Good."

Spike and Xander stood side by side surveying the entire arsenal before them.

"Right," Spike said. "You're the expert. Choose what we need. I'll keep a lookout."

"Yeah, you do that. That's all you're really good for," muttered Xander.

Spike saw red but remembered his promise to the Slayer. Ignoring the young man, the vampire turned his back to him.

Xander began to pick items left and right and shoving them in the bags that they had brought.

"You might think that banging Buffy is earning you sympathy points with the others but it's not working with me."

"Do I look like I care?"

"You should, asshole. I know what your game is."

"And that would be?" Spike asked bored already with the conversation.

"You're just using Buffy."

With lightning speed Spike had him by the throat in a death grip.

"Take that back, boy," he snarled with deadly intent.

For the first time in a very long time, Xander was afraid. The chip didn't seem to be affecting Spike and he had morphed into his game face. Xander had never seen him this angry. The vampire was shaking and all the veins in his neck stood out. Suddenly he released Xander shoving him hard against the wall. Turning away from the human, Spike's face contorted in excruciating pain. He staggered a little, his vision blurred from the effort of ignoring the shocks from the chip. The pain was still searing but Spike remained in control.

It was the first time that he had not backed down from the pain and he just knew that the headache that started to pound behind his eyes would be with him for a while. Still, it had been worth it to see that sniveling fool with fear in his eyes.

"Are you done?" he barked at Xander.

"Yeah, got everything."

When Xander didn't move, Spike turned toward him.

"What are you waiting for? Move! I'm not going to bite you, you stupid sod."

"Says who? That chip doesn't seem to be working so well."

"Think again, mate."

It was only then that Xander observed how wracked with pain he was.

"Hurts?" he inquired.

"Like a bitch."

"You still could have hurt me."

"The Slayer loves you which is why you live unharmed."

Xander stood still, rooted to the same spot. Spike looked him over and shook his head in an exasperated manner.

"Now what?" the young man complained.

"You do realize that all this is about you, don't you?"

"What do you mean?"

"All this deep rooted resentment about my involvement with Buffy. It's not about who or what I am; it's what you're not. What's been eating away at you for all these years is, why not you?"

"Hold on, hold on. I don't have a thing for Buffy, okay maybe once, but I'm in love with Anya."

"I know. But there's some unfinished business in your head. Time after time, the Slayer has chosen someone else though you have been right there by her side all along. So what gives? After all, you're reasonably good looking-"

"Hey!"

"Even funny, every now and then," continued Spike, "and besides Red, you're her closest friend. So why not you? Truth is, there is nothing you could have done about it. Let me put your mind at ease: it could never be you. Not because you aren't worthy enough but simply because Buffy needs a little darkness in her man. And just like Riley, that isn't in your nature. You have an incredible bond with Buffy: your friendship. Cherish it."

The vampire let his words sink in before speaking again.

"Okay?"

"Okay," answered Xander apparently still stunned by Spike's revelation.

While the young man gathered his thoughts, the vampire started to fill his bag with weapons trying to ignore the pounding in his skull.

"Buffy says you're eerily insightful," said Xander snapping out of his ruminations. "Guess she's right. It's funny, I never would have pegged you as an astute observer of the human condition."

"Well, when you live as long as I have you pick up a thing or two along the way."

"I don't know about that. Angel has been around way longer than you have and he's not attuned to people like you."

Spike was getting uncomfortable with the direction the conversation was taking.

"Yeah well, different experiences and all."

"It's actually strange how similar both your situations are. Angel has his soul, you have a chip yet you're so different."

"Of course we're different. I'm not Angel, never have and never will be. The only similarity that we share is that we're both vampires. That's all. I've really had my fill of Angel this, Angel that. Bleeding hell, it's enough to drive a vampire batty!"

"Oh, hey, liked that one! Vampire, batty. Very good."

"It was, wasn't it?" Spike said pleased with himself before gritting his teeth in a grimace of pain.

"Let's get out of here," said Xander.

Spike had already shouldered his bag and was leading the way out.

Shuffling sounds from the entrance told the girls that Spike and Xander were back. Buffy smiled widely and rushed out of the kitchen closely followed by Willow. Spike was busy helping Xander take the weapons out of the bags when Buffy hugged him from behind. He tensed visibly.

"Let go," he growled.

Hurt, Buffy released him. He was immediately sorry and enfolded her in his arms.

"Didn't mean it luv. I just don't feel too well. I'm going to go lie down for a bit."

Concerned Buffy turned toward Xander.

"What the hell happened?" she demanded. "Xander, so help me God if you-"

"Not the boy's fault Slayer," the vampire cut in. "It's nothing."

Having said that he headed upstairs. Buffy waited till she heard the door of the bedroom close then gazed at Xander.

"Cough it up Xander," she demanded.

Xander looked to Willow for support.

"Go on, tell us what happened," Willow urged. "It's not normal for Spike to be ill."

"First, I want you to know that Spike and I worked out our differences. We're not friends but-"

"Xander," interrupted Buffy impatiently, "why does my boyfriend look like he's been hit by a mack truck?"

"I kind of egged him on and he vamped out on me and tried to strangle me."

"What?! But the chip?"

"Still works which is why he's still in pain. He could have killed me easily Buffy, but he didn't."

Buffy nodded as she processed this new information. Willow looked on worriedly.

"Does this mean that he's recovered his bite -so to speak?" she asked.

"No, no," assured her Xander. "What I'm saying is that if push comes to shove, Spike can fight humans but it has to be quick and it has to count because he can't stand the pain for too long."

"Look at you," teased Willow, "Xander Harris, defender of William the Bloody."

"Ha, ha, don't push it. I said we cleared the air, not that I had become the president of his fan club."

"No, that's me," Buffy said. "I better check up on him. I'll be back soon and you can explain all these weapons to me."

"Sure thing."

Buffy found Spike lying face down on her bed, one arm hanging limply by the side. She tiptoed toward him.

"No need to be quiet luv. I'm not sleeping."

"How do you feel?"

"Like I'm being hit over the head with a troll hammer," he moaned.

"So it looks like you can still kick ass despite the chip."

"Yeah but it really has to be worth it because the punishment is something else."

Buffy sat beside him and gently stroke his hair in a soothing motion.

"Buffy?" he said weakly.

"Yeah?"

"You love me right?"

"Yes."

"Please stake me now and put me out of my misery," he pleaded.

"Poor baby," she cooed comfortingly.

Buffy stayed with him until he fell asleep and then left to rejoin the others downstairs.

It took a while for Xander to go through all the weapons with Buffy. Willow had even dozed off on the couch after ten minutes.

"Hey Buffy," Xander suddenly asked while she tried out one of the high-powered rifles. "I know this is none of my business and I completely understand if you don't want to talk about this but, what happened exactly between you and Riley?"

"You liked him didn't you?" Buffy said putting down the weapon.

"Well, yeah. It was fun to have another guy to talk to."

Buffy pondered whether she should tell him the truth.

"Look Buffy, don't go nuts about this. If you don't want to rehash I understand."

"That's not it Xander. Believe me, I'm completely over it. I'm not even angry or sad about it anymore."

"So what's the problem?"

"I just don't want to change the image you have of him."

"What are you saying?"

"I think you admired Riley and you were right to. He had a lot of great qualities," she said vaguely.

"But?" Xander prodded.

"You really want to know?"

"I do. Spike wouldn't talk because he said this was your call. I want to know," he said. "If that's okay with you," he added quickly.

Buffy sighed.

"Riley was getting suck jobs from female vampires. Apparently, they gave him something I couldn't."

"Like what? Oversized hickeys?" he blurted stunned by Buffy's revelation.

Buffy laughed. You could always trust Xander to diffuse a tense moment with laughter.

"Xander, are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah. Just shocked. I never in a million years would have guessed that. How on earth did you find out?"

"Spike told me."

"Well that figures. He'd do anything to make Riley look bad."

"Xander, listen to what you're saying. Nobody led Riley to that trampy vamp nest. He did it all on his own. He paid them to bite him. Believe me, Spike did me a favor. This could only have ended very badly."

"No, you're right. He did the right thing. What the hell was Riley thinking?" he said clearly disenchanted.

"I don't know Xander. I honestly don't and at this point, I don't care."

She picked up another nasty looking weapon. "What does this one do?"