"Yeah. It was cool how all those inner-city kids taught their coach a valuable lesson." She paused. "We should do this sort of thing again."
 

Thanks for sticking with me, despite my really long break between updates.

Tara had never thought of Spike as a monster. She had never seen him without the chip, which may make her opinion bias, but she couldn’t imagine him as a ruthless killer. Coming to her for help made the view that he was more than a demon under house arrest even stronger.

"I suppose I could look inside your head?" she said.

Spike looked a little weary. "Inside? Better not go poking about. Had enough of that." He lifted his hands and wiggled his fingers near his temples. "Can’t you just use your enhanced witchy senses to see if somethin’s off?"

She did have enhanced senses when it came to auras. But that wouldn’t help him out. His color had always been red and still was, although ever since he had gotten with Buffy there were glimmers in it. The chip had nothing to do with his personality.

"I-I won’t literally stick my fingers inside your brain," Tara softly assured him.

"Oh, right, good. Get to it then," he said.

"Are we going inside to do this?" asked Dawn.

Tara glanced at the house. It was dark except for a light on upstairs. She recognized it as the master bedroom. Willow’s room.

"That’s not a good idea, Dawnie. Sorry. We can’t expose Willow to magic right now," Tara objected.

Dawn frowned, clearly disappointed.

"The Magic Box?"

Tara glanced at her watch. "It’s late. The shop is closed."

"Spike could break us in."

Spike smirked.

"No," Tara said.

Spike shook his head. "Can’t you at least let me be a ‘little’ bit evil?" He sighed. "Fine. We’ll meet up at my crypt. You’ll get the stuff round, yeah?"

"Sure."

"Right then." He dug into his duster pocket for a cigarette. Lighting up he turned. "See you both then."

On their way to Tara’s dorm, they were silent for a long while. Dawn was the one to break it.

"I don’t think Spike’s chip is bad," she said.

"It’s a piece of hardware. Things don’t last forever."

"I know, but it di- Um, the Initiative seemed pretty confident it would last."

"I think Spike was a beta-tester." Tara glanced over and smiled. "Don’t worry, sweetie. Spike puts too much credit on the chip. I’m sure even if it is bad he won’t hurt us."

Dawn nodded. "Buffy wouldn’t like it."

"He loves you too, you know? Why else would he ba. . . watch you all summer? " She had almost said baby-sit, which she knew would annoy Dawn.

"Because he promised my sister," Dawn muttered. "But you’re right. I think he does love me. But I’m not like Buffy."

Tara grabbed Dawn’s hand and squeezed it. She got the impression that Dawn felt a little jealous.

They arrived at Tara’s dorm and gathered the ingredients needed for the spell. Luckily it was simple and didn’t require much. Neither had any trouble carrying the small amount of candles, incense, herbs, etc. on the trek over. Tara had never been to Spike’s crypt, but Dawn knew the way by heart.

Tara expected to find a dirty, cold, dark, and empty place. It was cold and dark. There weren’t any cobwebs in sight, though. And . . furniture? She blinked in surprise.

She set up quickly. Spike sat in the circle, dubiously. Dawn hovered nearby. The spell was supposed to detect what was wrong with something so it could be fixed. She found nothing. She was pretty confident that meant the chip was in ship-shape. It could also mean that the spell didn’t work. But seeing as the spell was ‘extremely’ novice . . .

"What’s the verdict, sprite?" Spike leaned back on his hands to examine her.

"There’s nothing wrong," she said.

"How sure are you bout that?"

"Uh . . . Nine-Ninety-nine percent?"

There was a moment of silence. Then he nodded. She let out a breath.

"All right. Fair enough." He took a moment to ponder the results.

Dawn moved closer. "This is good, right?" she asked.

"Okay, maybe the chip was affected while under the spell," he rationalized.

"No," Tara said. "The spell didn’t have a physical effect, only mental."

Spike’s head shot up. He got to his feet. He stepped over the candles and began to pace, running his hand through his gelled hair. He mumbled to himself.

Dawn gave Tara a questioning look. Tara honestly didn’t have an answer. Was Spike disappointed that the chip still worked fine?

"Bloody hell," Spike said, his voice raising. He halted and turned toward the girls. "You know what this means, right?"

Tara shook her head. Dawn said ‘no’.

"If nothing’s wrong up here. . . "He tapped his temple. "Then . . Then there must be something wrong with her."

"Her?" Tara questioned.

"Buffy."

"What?"

"I hit her. During Red’s spell. I hit her and there were no blasts. That means Red musta done something wrong when she brought the slayer back. There’s always consequences. Always." He said the last part mostly to himself.

"I-I don’t think. . ."

Dawn looked stricken by the implication. She shook her head. "No, I refuse to believe that!"

Spike directed his gaze on the teen. "Think about it, bite size. I can’t hurt humans. If I hurt Buffy . . ."

"No!" cried Dawn. "Maybe Buffy is different, but she isn’t . . . wrong."

Tara inwardly shuddered. What had Willow done? She felt her heart sink. Spike was right. There were always consequences, may them be good or bad. Some people called it karma, or the three fold law. There was no way she could accept all of what Willow had done. Her girl- ex girlfriend had fallen too far into the darkness. She feared that Willow had fallen too deep to ever climb back out into the light.

"I’ll look into the spell Willow cast," Tara offered.

This seemed to calm Spike down. He gave the witch an appreciative smile. "Thanks, Glenda."

+ + +

Buffy hadn’t seen Spike in four days. She had been busy with work, talking things through with Giles, and dealing with Willow. She was surprised that he hadn’t dropped by. That wasn’t like him. Even when they weren’t together he had purposely run into her.

On the fifth morning she couldn’t stand it anymore. She set her coffee down on the counter and faced her sister. She realized then, with a pang of guilt, that she had barely seen her sister in four days either. Dawn glanced up from her Coco-Puffs.

"Have you seen Spike recently?" Buffy tried to make it sound nonchalant.

Dawn munched away. With her mouth full she said," Yeah, the other day."

"Is something wrong? Is he avoiding me for some reason?"

Dawn dropped her spoon. "He’s probably still dwelling over the fact that he can hurt you."

The slayer’s eyes widened. "Hurt me? When did he hurt me?" Then she remembered. "Oh."

"Yeah." Dawn paused. "Tara’s looking into it."

"Good. Then he’ll find out all that’s wrong is a really bad suntan."

"Huh?"

"I never told you about that? Tara said my molecules got heated or something. I never really got it; but the point is that I’m okay."

"I know you’re okay. But Spike is not quite so sure."

All of a sudden there was a honk. Buffy knew it was Xander. Dawn quickly slurped down her bowl of milk. She grabbed her coat. Buffy was disappointed that their conversation had to be cut short. Dawn gave her a parting hug.

"Go see him," Dawn said.

"Did you pack a lunch?" Buffy asked.

"I’ll get something from the vending machine."

Buffy was ready to protest but her sister hurried out of the room. "Gotta go, can’t be late! Bye!"

She sighed. "Bye."

+ + +

Following Dawn’s advice, Buffy went to see Spike. She found him in his favorite chair (his only chair), sipping on a mug of blood and watching TV. His eyes might have been glued on the soap, but she got the impression that his attention was somewhere else.

"What brings you by, luv?"

She could have laughed.

"What brings me by? Oh, I don’t know Spike, maybe I was bored and decided to waste some time."

He didn’t reply.

"That was sarcasm," she said. "My time with you isn’t a waste. I thought you would be aware of how relationships work, you being one hundred and fifty-"

"One hundred and forty-six."

"What?"

"’M one hundred and forty-six."

"Whatever. Point is you’re old. You should know stuff. You should know that girlfriends visit their boyfriends."

He was silent. Seconds ticked by and with each one she grew more frustrated.

Finally he spoke. "Is that what we are, pet? Girlfriend and boyfriend?"

She rolled her eyes. "Well, duh."

Her frustration had grown into anger. He had yet to face her. She stomped over and switched off the television. "Will you look at me?"

His blank gaze landed on her.

"Why are you being like this?" she demanded. She knew she hadn’t done a damn thing. "Wait, I know what this is! You always get like this when you have to deal with something. You hide your feelings by acting all dumbass. Well, I’m not going to take it." She crossed her arms. "Tell me straight up why you’ve been avoiding me."

"Haven’t been avoiding. Just been busy is all."

Gesturing to the TV screen, she said, "Watching shows?"

"Is it any of your business?"

Fire touched her eyes. "God, Spike, sometimes-!" She let out an ‘eeeer’ sound. She wanted to punch him. She wanted to make his nose bleed. But she knew that wouldn’t solve anything. She struggled to calm down.

"You think you know me, slayer? You think you’ve got me all figured out, don’t you?"

Her face hard, she said, "Better than you think."

He stood up. His movements were fluid, catlike. "Think again. You have ‘no’ idea what I’m feelin right now."

"So tell me! Explain to me what the problem is!"

He took a step toward her. "The problem is that I could knock you to the floor right now. I could rip the clothes from your body and screw your brains out. I could make it hurt real good, baby."

That was the turning point. In that moment Buffy made a mistake. She knew his reference collided with his future attempted rape act. She knew it. But that didn’t change the fact that she was turned on. The heat had seeped through her, igniting every nerve. Most of the attention was focused between her legs. Oh how she wanted him.

She could have prevented it. She should have cleared her mind and shook off her desire. Instead she fell, as if in a trap.

"Why don’t you?" she seductively asked. It was a challenge, an ‘I dare you to’.

Never dare a vampire. More importantly never dare a vampire without a soul. And even more essential, never dare a soulless vampire with issues.

At first Spike was stunned. Then something came over him. He smirked. "Would you like that, baby?"

And Buffy smiled. "Maybe."

Later Buffy would remember this with disgust. Honestly this wasn’t her. Something else was controlling her. Some primal part of her that was usually hidden down deep. Possibly the same part of her that had been attracted to Dracula, and lured her from bed at night to the graveyard. The slayer part. And she got off on pain.

What Spike did next wasn’t him either. It was his primitiveness acting as well. She couldn’t really blame him. She had taunted him, driven it to the surface.

Spike pounced.

She hit the stone floor, her head banging against it. Spike grabbed hold of her clothing and tore it off. She reiterated the act, her hands frantically impatient. His cold, naked body smashed against hers. He pounded into her with no restraint. She cried out as he rode her to oblivion.

This would have been exactly how the bathroom scene played out if he had succeeded, if she had let him get away with it.

He had not failed in his promise. It hurt real good.

And she enjoyed it.

______________________________________________

The first thing she was aware of was the cold, hard floor. Her eyes popped open and she checked to see if the roof had caved in. Luckily it hadn’t. She abruptly sat up. Déjà vu rushed through her. She half expected to find rubble scattered across the place. The only indication of their rough play was their dispersed clothing, however. She snatched her panties up, finding them ripped.

"Oh my God," she slowly said.

"Did I do that?" asked a deep, masculine voice.

Buffy’s head snapped over to find Spike. He was propped up on his elbows, examining her with an innocent look on his face. Buffy lowered the ruined garment. That wasn’t the only thing ruined because of their violent nature. How could she have made the same mistake over again? How would she ever be able to fix this?

Buffy spotted her skirt. She picked it up and quickly stepped into it. Then she threw on her blouse. As an afterthought, she stuffed the panties into her pocket. She scanned the room.

"Where are my shoes?"

"What’s the hurry, luv?"

She wrapped her arms around herself. "I can’t stay here."

His eyes darkened. "So that’s it? You’re going to leave all disgusted because of my evil antics? Newsflash, princess, I’m a ‘vampire’. You knew that when you got into this gig."

She couldn’t argue there. She knew there was darkness inside him. What she hadn’t anticipated was the darkness that he could bring out in her.

She briefly closed her eyes and shuddered. She didn’t belong in the shadows, but he could pull her down into them. She’d let him . . . and she’d like it. Maybe this wouldn’t work. She loved him and he loved her, but sometimes there were other factors that interfere. What if she couldn’t be with him without falling into the deep abyss? And what other option was there? It wasn’t like she could bring him out into the light.

"You’re right," she said. "But if we keep this going it’s going to kill us both. Believe me I know."

Spike swiftly got to his feet. He stood before her in all his naked glory. She managed to keep her gaze focused on his face.

"What are you saying, luv? That it’s over?"

Her heart broke. She took a shaky breath.

"I don’t know. Maybe," she whispered.

He stared at her in shock. His eyes lost all life.

Buffy turned. If she looked at him for another second she’d break. She’d stay and bring more destruction upon them.

"I need time to think," she declared.

She left before waiting for a reply.

+ + +

Work was difficult. She couldn’t focus. She gave a customer Sleepless in Seattle instead of Sleeping with the Enemy. The guy wasn’t pleased and demanded that he receive a free movie, which led to her boss not being so pleased either.

As soon as she came home Dawn met her at the door. Buffy didn’t bother taking off her coat or shoes. She knew from her sister’s expression that something bad was up.

"Willow is gone!" Dawn explained.

"What? Weren’t you home? Why didn’t you stop her from leaving?" Buffy scolded.

As soon as Buffy said that she scanned Dawn for any injury. Flashbacks of the broken arm incident came to mind. What if Willow somehow used magic to harm Dawn in order to leave? She relaxed when she came up with no sign of her worry.

"She went upstairs to take a nap. A couple hours later I went to check on her and found her gone. Apparently she teleported out of the house or something. Or, she could have climbed out the window like you used to do."

Buffy nodded. She rubbed her temples, trying to think. Work, brain, work.

"You don’t think she went out with Amy, do you?" Dawn asked.

"Oh God," Buffy said. "That’s exactly where I think she went."

They were both silent for a moment as that sunk in. Buffy felt like letting herself give out, to just collapse. Nothing she did was making any difference whatsoever. It was times like this that she did shut down in a manner of perspective. She brought forth the slayer hundred percent.

"We have to get Spike."

"What? Why?"

Dawn gave her a ‘duh’ look. "He’s the only one that can find Rack."

"No. We don’t need him."

"I don’t remember the exact location. We need him."

Buffy sighed. Dawn was right. They needed him. She reluctantly nodded.

They were almost to his crypt when Dawn asked, "Did you both have a fight?"

A fight would have been all right. No, it was far worse.

"Something like that, Dawnie."

Dawn shook her head. "It’ll be all right. Nothing can be sunshine and roses all the time."

Buffy stared straight ahead into the darkness.

The slayer stopped abruptly when they reached the stone tomb. She rose her foot to kick the door in without even thinking. Dawn pulled her back.

"What are you doing?" Dawn demanded.

That was Buffy’s breaking point. Tears escaped her eyes as the girl peeked through the slayer facade.

"This is worse than just a fight, isn’t it? Did you two break up?"

"I don’t know," Buffy choked.

Dawn gave her a hug.

"You wait her. I’ll go get him. Take some time to compose yourself."

Buffy shook her head. "No, you’re the one that should wait."

"Why?"

"Because he wasn’t so presentable last time I was here asking for help with Rack."

At first Dawn didn’t get it. Then a blush spread across her face.

Buffy crept inside. It was pitch black, but she knew the place by heart. She made her way to the trapdoor that led downstairs. She climbed down. The faint light of candles illuminated the bedroom. Good thing they weren’t near wood or it would have been a big fire hazard.

She took a moment to gaze at the pale body on the bed. He was completely uncovered. His face was directed her way, eyes closed. He looked so innocent, like a little boy. She hated to wake him.

"Spike."

He didn’t even stir.

"Spike?" This time she said his name louder.

Still nothing. She reached out and laid a hand on his arm. His eyes instantly popped open. She jumped backwards.

Spike sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He perched on the end, his head lifted to her.

"You sleep like the dead."

He raised an eyebrow. "Bit knackered. Had a long night."

Buffy ignored him. "Look, I need your help."

His expression darkened.

"Please, Spike. This has nothing to do with us. Willow is in trouble. Dawn and I really have to find her."

"The bit is with you?"

"Yeah."

Spike stood up. "Right then."

+ + +

Dawn trailed behind her two favorite people. The blondes purposely kept their distance. She hated it. They both loved each other. Shouldn’t that be enough? The quiet was really getting to her.

"So, uh, Spike? We should ya know, hang out."

Spike turned. "What was that?"

"You should come over and have a movie night with me or something. Bandits. Or, hey, Fast and the Furious."

He glanced at Buffy, unsure. "Depends on big sis."

Buffy gave Spike a long look. "Spike, I’m not putting a restraining order on you. Come by and see Dawn anytime you want."

Dawn smiled. Call her miss matchmaker. She knew that she could get them to get over whatever the problem was.

"Anything?" Buffy asked Spike.

"Not yet," Spike said.

Silence took over again.

Suddenly Spike halted. "Do you see something?"

Dawn searched the street. She couldn’t find anything.

"No," Buffy said, apparently not seeing anything either.

Spike pointed. "There, comin closer."

"I think . . . "Buffy began. "Willow!"

Sure enough it was Willow. She stumbled toward them. When she reached them she crumpled to the ground, exhausted. Buffy knelt beside her.

"Are you okay? What happened?"

Expecting black-eyed Willow, Dawn was surprised to see happy Willow. The redhead had a proud smile plastered on her face.

"I got away!" she exclaimed. "I was strong and left!"

"What are you talkin about, Red?" Spike questioned.

"Rack did something to me. I felt . . . It was amazing. But then things got bad. I saw things. Horrible things. So I . . . " Her smile grew larger. She focused on her best friend. "I rejected it. The magic was so strong but I got away. I knew that if I didn’t I’d lose myself."

Buffy grabbed Willow and hugged her. Buffy began to cry. Willow’s mouth went slack and tears spilled over. Dawn took a staggering step and then lowered to join in. When they untangled Spike was gone.

+ + +

The next night Buffy found herself on Spike’s doorstep. She knocked and then wrapped her arms around herself. The door swung open after a moment. Spike stood there in a pair of unzipped jeans and nothing else.

"What are you doing here?"

The coldness in his voice startled her.

"I’ve been thinking," she said.

"About what?"

"About us."

Without feeling he said," Thought there wasn’t an ‘us’."

"I said I needed time. Well I took time and I’ve figured it out. I think maybe it was Willow who opened up my eyes." She met his intense gaze. His expression didn’t change.

"She made me see that we can fight. Maybe we’re drawn to the darkness but that doesn’t mean we have to let it control us," she continued.

That got through to him. His blank mask fell away to be replaced by vulnerability. "Maybe you were right, though. The reason I had been avoiding you was because I didn’t want to hurt you. The demon is always there, Buffy. It doesn’t want to kill you anymore, but it bloody well doesn’t want puppies and snuggles."

"I know that," Buffy said. She reached out and cupped his cheek. "I also know that you can be gentle. I believe you can be a good man, William, if you choose to be."

There was that look again. She remembered it down in the basement just before the bringers took him away. It had been so soulful. Wonder filled her that he could appear so soulful now when he very well couldn’t be.

He shut his eyes. "Do you really believe that?"

"Yes. And I also believe that I can be a good woman for you. We can both be deserving of each other."

Buffy slid by him, grabbed his hand, and then pulled him along. He watched her with questioning as she led him through the dimly lit crypt. She let go of him to open the latch that led below and began to make her way down. She stopped at the top and gestured for him to follow. He complied without a word but she could sense his confusion.

When Buffy got to the bottom she turned. His bed was covered in black silken sheets. She smiled and went to them. She slipped into the unmade bed. Spike stared at her, desire flooding over him, but he didn’t move to join her. She stretched out her hand.

"Come to me, William," she whispered. "Come make love to me."

"Buffy . . .?"

"It’s all right."

Problem solved. Buffy had come to an enlightening solution to their dark nature. The only reason it got out of hand was because when one got violent the other did as well. She could train them to bring out the tenderness instead. If one began to loose it the other could bring them back.

Spike hesitantly sat on the bed. His left hand tangled in her hair. Her eyes fluttered with emotion.

"I love you," she breathed.

She got worried when he remained still. She looked up and got a glimpse of his wet face. He quickly turned away. She took his head and brought it back to face her.

"Don’t be ashamed to show how you feel, baby."

"S’ like a dream, pet. I dreamed of this so many times."

She tugged him down for a kiss. "So have I."

Their actions were slow and thoughtful. When he entered her it wasn’t about wanting to feel. She ‘already’ felt. It was about manifesting emotions and reinforcing them. She got that now.

+ + +

If you wanted to do something right, you had to do it yourself. That was Warren’s new motto. Jonathan and Andrew were a mistake, only a liability. Sure Andrew could summon demons, and Jonathan . . . What did Jonathan even offer the team? Anyway, he didn’t need them. He was stronger on his own.

It took him forever to move out of his parents’ basement and find a new place. It took him longer to rebuild. Then he had to have a fit of rage thinking about the slayer and tear it up.

He sat in the rubble, his jaw twitching. He had to focus and not let his anger interfere with the mission.

Munching on some corn chips, Xander kept his eyes glued to the dance floor. "Look at them. So . . . steamy. It makes my skin crawl."

The sound of music boomed through the club. Lots of young couples danced away to it. There was one couple that stood out amongst them, that of a pair of blondes. They gyrated to the heavy beat, oblivious to everything else around them.

A sound of irritation came from Anya. She reached over and snatched the snack bag away from her fiancé. "Can you take your attention away from Spike and Buffy, and put your focus on more important matters? Like the wedding. We only have a miniscule amount of time left before the big day. The seating is way off. It has to be fixed."

Xander tore his gaze away from the writhing bodies. "Sorry. I can’t help it. I can’t believe she’d voluntarily touch the bleached undead. All those times I told him he didn’t have a chance. Every time I see them together I want to pull them apart and knock some sense into her." He gestured to his best friend and the vampire. "Why him? I know one of these days he’s going to turn on us."

"Oh, quit!" Anya shook her head. She dug into the Doritos bag. "Have you ever seen Buffy so happy?"

"No, and that’s my point. When he does pull an Angelus on her, the loss it going to tear her to pieces."

"That’s her business, Xander. Not yours. She needs to make her own decisions. Now, where should we put your uncle?"

He sighed. "It isn’t the table settings; it’s the arrangements that need to be redone. We can’t have my family so close to your friends."

"Well we can’t put up a brick wall to separate them." She paused. "Can we?"

Xander took the sack of chips back. "I think I love that plan. Why did we ever invite ‘everyone’? I’d be perfectly happy with just the gang."

"The invitations have already been sent out."

"I know that . . . I’m just saying . . ."

"Stop eating! You eat when you’re nervous."

"So do you," he pointed out.

Anya pouted, aware that he was right. After a moment she gave in and stole a chip. They both wallowed in wedding woes, pigging out on fattening junk food.

+ + +

Dawn was having a blast. Everyone she loved was all together at the Bronze. Well, except Tara. She went over to Willow and handed her a soda.

"How are Mr. and Mrs. High Strung?" Willow questioned.

"I’m betting they explode," Dawn said. She took a sip of her drink.

"You know, when I was little, I used to spend hours imagining what my wedding to Xander would be like. Now I look at them . . . I just think . . . Nee-hee-hee!"

Dawn giggled at that. "You seem chipper."

"Can’t hide it." Willow grinned.

"Is it because of Tara?"

"Partly."

"You gonna call her and invite her over?"

"Not yet. But if I did she wouldn’t hang up."

"That’s progress."

"Hence the happy."

All of a sudden hands reached out and grabbed Dawn. She squealed in surprise. Willow rescued the girl’s drink before it spilled all over.

"Come on, bit. Get your groove on with us," Spike demanded. He dragged the teen off with him. "You too, Willow."

Willow set the drinks down and joined them. Dawn and her spun around together with the music.

+ + +

She smiled as she recognized the title. "That one’s a good one," she said while scanning the movie through.

The girl’s eyes lit up, clearly glad she chose well. "Really?"

"Definitely one of my favorites. I’m normally an action gal, but this one is great. Sure it is a chick flick, but there is also sword fights and stuff."

"Cool."

The customer paid. Buffy handed the girl The Princess Bride. "Thanks and enjoy."

Buffy turned toward the returned videos, prepared to put them away. She sensed someone approach the counter.

"H-" She met the person’s eyes. "-Hi!"

She gaped up at Riley Finn. The first thing she noticed was the scar across his left eye. She wondered again how it happened. He was dressed all in black, complete with a bulletproof vest. She didn’t know what she felt at that moment. What was the date? How could it have slipped her mind that today was the day her ex came back to town?

"Hey," Riley said in greeting. His voice was anything but glad, his expression grim.

"H-hey," she stammered.

"Sorry to drop in on you, Buffy."

She got her brain to work a little. "That’s okay."

"Look, this isn't the way I wanted it. But something's come up, something big. We don't have much time. You understand?"

"Uh, I think so."

God he was tall. He hovered over her, making her feel dwarf size. Spike never made her feel that way. Oh, God, Spike! How would he react to Riley Finn showing up? You know exactly how, Buffy. He’s going to gloat and throw your relationship in his face. Oh well. Let him.

"You’re working. I should have anticipated this."

"I can’t just leave," Buffy said. She was the only one there at the moment. It was a Tuesday, one of the video rental store’s slowest days. She glanced at the clock. 7:46.

"Of course."

"But-But I close up at eight tonight. I can leave then."

He nodded. "I’ll wait outside then."

"O-kay."

She watched him retreat out the door. She let out a sigh of relief. At least she didn’t have a cow on her head. She glanced down at her gray shirt and jeans. Why did she pick the gray t-shirt? She ran her fingers through her long locks.

The remaining fourteen minutes seemed to last forever. No one else entered the store that night, which she was thankful for. She locked up on record time. She grabbed her coat, fingering the stake within her pocket. She met up with Riley outside the door.

"So, what’s the what?"

"Suvolte demon. Rare, lethal ... nearly extinct, but not nearly enough." He took out a device. It beeped, obviously telling Riley some kind of useful information. Buffy couldn’t decipher how or what. "It's close."

Buffy cracked a smile. "You’re like James Bond. It’s so cute."

Was she flirting? Stop, Buffy, stop. He’s married. And remember Spike.

He put the strange gadget away. "We've been tear-assing through every jungle from Paraguay up, taking out nests. As soon as we put one Suvolte down, a dozen take its place. They're breeders, Buffy. One turns into ten, ten becomes a hundred. This gets out of hand and there's a war with humans? Humans are gonna lose."

She simply nodded, leaving the tribble comment out of it.

"We should drive," Riley commented. "It’d be faster."

They loaded up in the black vehicle. Buffy ran her hand over the SUV’s leather upholstery.

"Nice wheels."

For the first time Riley smiled. "Came with the car."

She smiled back.

"I take it you know where we’re going."

"Got an idea. The tag's on-line. We'll find it," he said. He watched the road. "Listen, if we ever get a minute I’ve got some stories to tell you."

She shifted in her seat. "I’ve got some stuff to tell you too. Some you wouldn’t believe." The last part was in a whisper.

Riley reached behind the seat. He handed her some clothing.

"Here. This is black ops."

She eyed the questionable attire. "Ninja wear?"

"Battle gear. Lightweight Kevlar, state of the art."

Buffy remembered the outfit being itchy. She didn’t want to argue with Riley, though, so she complied anyway.

"Don’t look," she warned.

"Perfect gentleman."

They were silent awhile. Buffy changed as quickly as possible.

"You know, there's not many people I'd ask to risk their life for me, Buffy. It's really good to see you."

"Thanks. It’s good to see you as well."

Miraculously it was. It was easier this time around. She knew what to expect. And the fact that she had her own honey waiting for her didn’t hurt.

The car screeched to a halt. They got out and made their way to the dam wall. When she held on to Riley as they slid down, she didn’t hold on so tight.

Riley detached the line from his belt when they hit the bottom. They ducked past a large pipe. A ways down was a ladder. Out of nowhere a demon jumped out. It tackled Riley from behind. He threw it off.

She had forgotten how vile the creature was. It slobbered and stunk. She attacked the thing, but was thrown aside. It went back at Riley. She got up and kicked at it until it fell off. It recovered quickly, hitting them both. They smashed into the stone wall. Then Riley got hit in the stomach. He grunted in pain.

"Riley!"

The slayer grabbed Riley and used him for leverage to lift both her feet. She smacked them into the demon. It fell to the ground.

A woman jumped down beside them. She straightened. Buffy took her in. She wore a battle gear outfit like Riley, and wow, she could pull it off. She glanced down at herself, feeling foolish in the suit.

"Hey there!" Sam called. "What exactly are you doing with my husband?"

Buffy took a step away from Riley. Nothing, absolutely nothing, her mind cried.

"Buffy, meet Sam. Sam, meet Buffy," Riley said.

Sam smiled. She held out her hand. "Pleasure."

"Demon," Buffy said.

The demon had gotten up off the ground. It snarled at the triad.

Don’t kill it, she told herself.

Sam rushed at the demon. "Mine."

Buffy watched the fight. "She’s good."

"She’s a special one."

Buffy remained silent.

"I meant to tell you," he went on.

"I know."

The demon hit Sam across the face. She went down. Riley grabbed a discarded taser. He aimed, but didn’t get a chance to fire. The gun went flying, and then him as well.

Screw not killing the demon! Slayers did what had to be done. She entered the fight. She grappled with the demon before getting the upper hand. She broke the Suvolte’s neck.

Buffy panted. "Sorry, guys. You might not have wanted me to kill it."

Sam shook her head. "No, that’s okay. It was good you did. It would have got us all given the chance."

+ + +

Buffy and Sam made their way through the cemetery. Their mission was to find the Suvolte nest by Riley’s request.

"Thanks for letting me tag along," Sam said.

"No problem."

"Maybe not for you. I gotta tell you, Buffy, I'm a little bit intimidated. I mean, patrolling with the real live Slayer, you're like ... Santa Claus, or Buddha, or something."

What was she supposed to say to that?

"You’re legendary. And it's not just slayer status I'm talking about. It's you," Sam continued.

"Riley talks about me?"

"He didn't say anything for a long time, but I could tell. He was ripped up inside."

Buffy looked down at her feet. "I’m glad he has you."

"More like miraculous. I went down to Central America with the Peace Corps. One night, my entire infirmary got slaughtered by..." Sam shook her head. "I didn't know what they were. I got saved, quit the Corps, joined the squad. My first firefight, I met Riley.We started talking, you know, first about tactics, missions, stuff like that. And then about you."

"He thinks ... I let him go."

"Do you wish you hadn’t?"

What a question. Buffy thought about that one. Really thought about it. She glanced at Sam, the perfect woman. Buffy realized something then. She could never be perfect. She didn’t want to be perfect. She didn’t want someone who wanted perfect. She wanted to be herself. She wanted someone who wanted her to be imperfect. Just Buffy, slayer, girl, and all.

"I just regret giving him pain." A smile formed on Buffy’s lips. "But I don’t regret where we both are now. He’s moved on to something good. And so have I."

"So, you seeing anyone new? Someone special?" Sam asked.

Warmth spread through Buffy. "Yeah. Someone special."

They stopped walking.

"Good," Sam told her. "I’m glad."

Thoughts of Spike led Buffy to a realization. Spike was connected to the Sulvolte eggs. But he wouldn’t . . . Not after . . .

"Sam. You know what? Um, I think we should split up," Buffy blurted.

"Oh, I'm slowing you down. I knew I would, this was just selfish of me," Sam apologized.

"No! Nothing like that. There’s this guy. He might know where to find the nest."

"Cool. I'm guessing Finn needs me about now." She glanced around at the graves. "He's probably off somewhere gettin' his ass kicked. You know how wild he gets." She backed away. "Don't worry about Rye and me, we're good."

+ + +

Buffy paused outside Spike’s crypt. Her heart raced. She was scared to go in. She was scared of what she would find. She kept telling herself that Spike wouldn’t let her down this time. He couldn’t. She didn’t know what she would do if he did.

She opened the door and stepped in. She found Spike perched on the edge of his sarcophagus. He glanced up from his book. She took note that it was a compilation of poetry. Poetry?

Spike put the book aside. He smiled at her and hopped down. "Hello, luv. Wasn’t expecting you. Pleasant surprise and all."

She came up to him. She met him with pleading eyes. "Tell me you love me."

He cocked his head. "I love you. You know I do."

"You wouldn’t do anything to hurt me?"

Worry crept across his gaze. "Is something bothering you?"

"I love you." It came out in a choked sob.

He hushed her. His cold lips came down on her warm ones. She surrendered to the touch. She needed assurance that everything would be all right. Please, Spike, tell me it will be all right. You aren’t bad. I know you can be good for me.

Spike’s hand ventured to her breast. She broke away. He gave her a confused look.

"Not here." She gathered her courage. She swallowed. "Let’s go. . . down to the bed."

She saw a glimpse of hesitation and her heart sank. No, please no.

"You don’t mind, do you?"

Spike cupped her cheek. "Course not." He took her hand. "Come on."

He led her down to the lower level. She surveyed the bedroom. It was clean. Tears slipped from her eyes.

"Buffy?" Spike asked in concern.

She hugged him. She cried into his dark shirt. "Oh, God, Spike. I was so scared. But everything is all right."

He held her to him, completely baffled. He didn’t ask her what it was all about. He simply told her it was okay.

She was so relieved, and so built up with emotion. She couldn’t hold it in anymore. She knew she shouldn’t. They had demons to find. But she didn’t care. She began to remove his clothing.

+ + +

Afterward, Buffy and Spike cuddled together. Suddenly the trap door came open. Footsteps came down the ladder. Buffy immediately sat up with a gasp. She hugged the sheets to her naked body.

Spike rose as well. He glared at the soldier. "What are you doing here?"

Buffy shook. Spike put his arm around her, which helped a little.

Riley didn’t respond. He tried to keep his eyes averted.

"Must sting, huh? Me and your former? Must kill."

"That’s not why I’m here," Riley said. He lifted his gun and turned toward Spike. "Doctor."

Buffy was so embarrassed. She reached for her clothes and started to dress.

"I thought we ran you out of town," Spike told Riley. "Last time I saw you, if memory serves, you were getting the juice sucked out of you by some undead ladies of very questionable reputation. Be a good tin soldier and push off."

Riley remained collected. "Where are they, Doctor?"

Spike furrowed his brow. "Why do you keep calling me that?" He got off the bed to put on his pants.

"Glad to be back in Sunnydale. The locals all speak English, and I know who to beat for information. It's all brought me here."

Fastening his belt, Spike said, "You must have heard wrong." He gestured to the bedroom. "Nothing is here as you can see."

"Where are the eggs, Spike?"

"Eggs?"

Buffy came forward. "It can’t be Spike," she insisted.

Riley punched Spike in the nose. Buffy stepped between the two.

"Riley, it isn’t Spike," she repeated. "There isn’t anything here."

"They must be somewhere else then," Riley said.

"What are you lookin for anyway?" Spike asked. It was mostly directed at Buffy.

"Solvolte demon eggs," Buffy said.

Spike’s eyes widened.

"You think I’d keep them here? You know me better than that."

"I do. I know you. I just . . ."

Spike took her hand. "It’s all right, luv."

The vampire looked at Riley. "I know where your Solvolte nest is."

Riley pointed his gun. "Lead me to them, Doctor."

Anger rose up in Spike. Buffy could feel it coming off of him in waves.

"You, git! I’m not the doctor. I was given the chance to keep the eggs for a friend, but I declined." He squeezed Buffy’s palm. "Knew it’d hurt my lady. I’ll give you the eggs, but I’m not leading you to them. You’ll rush in there and blow the place to pieces. I owe my mate better than that."

Riley’s eyes darkened. "It’s a demon, Buffy. That’s what they deserve."

Buffy shook her head. She addressed her boyfriend. "I’ll go with you. We’ll collect the eggs together. I promise to leave your friend alone."

Spike smiled. "Right then."

"Buffy?" Riley protested.

The slayer’s resolve face was firm. "Meet me at the Magic Box."

+ + +

It turned out to be a poker buddy of Spike’s. The bumpy-skinned demon apparently wasn’t having the best of luck at cards. He wasn’t happy about the violation of his home but didn’t fight them.

The eggs had been properly frozen this time. It was a cinch to gather them and hand them over.

+ + +

Buffy walked alone with Riley.

"So, where are you and Sam headed now?"

"Nepal."

"Sounds fun."

"I’ll send a postcard."

They both stopped.

"Buffy-"

"Riley-"

She let him go first.

"I’m done here. I was supposed to take out the Doctor, but if you don’t want me to . . ."

"I’ll keep an eye on him. He’s mostly harmless."

Riley nodded.

"So you and Spike are-" Riley couldn’t finish the sentence.

"Yeah. But it’s more than that." She took in a breath. "I love him."

He blinked.

"Speechless, I gather."

"I wish you luck," he said. "I hope you never have to take him out."

She froze, stunned. "Not the reaction I was anticipating."

"I don’t like seeing you with that idiot."

She smiled a little.

"But he makes you happy. You glow."

"I do?" she asked, amazed.

"Not that you didn’t before. But-"

"I get it." She paused. "So, we’re good."

"I guess so."

Buffy bid the happy couple farewell. She watched the helicopter depart into the night sky with satisfaction. She’d never have perfection like Riley and Sam, but she had what she wanted.

___________________________________________

That was long, you guys. Hope you liked.

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