DISCLAIMER: Unfortunately, I don’t own Spike or Buffy...or Angel, Cordelia, and Gunn....They belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy and whoever else was involved in their creation. However, Azure, Rinoa, and Kevin are mine :).

SPOILERS: Everything up to ‘Showtime’ is fair play.

RATING: R

SUMMARY: 150 years ago, Spike left Sunnydale and Buffy for good. Now, she‘s back from the dead with a secret she never told him and her secret has come with her...I can‘t do summaries... please r/r S/B entirely AU

by: Jessyca

One-hundred and fifty years has passed since he last stood here. One-hundred and fifty years too long. He knew he should have come earlier and more often to visit her, to talk to her, tell her he loved her - still loved her.

Spike sighed as he finally gathered up enough courage to look down at her name : Buffy Anne Summers. Her final resting spot. This time for good. She had been the love of his life; or unlife as it was. The one woman who made him feel alive, made him feel like a man. She gave him the confidence to continue living after he acquired his soul. But it - all the confidence she instilled in him, all his reasons - was taken from him when she died.

Eventually, he gathered the courage to speak. “Hey, Buffy, luv,” he whispered, trying to keep his emotions in check. “I meant to come earlier but you know how it is.” There was a pause in his speech. “I miss you. I’m not sure if you can hear anything I’m saying but I needed you to know that.” He opened his mouth to say more but was cut off by a scream.

Spike listened as the voice screamed again. He had been around long enough to recognize the fear in the scream. It was close, whoever it was.

“Pardon me, luv,” he told Buffy as instincts kicked in and he ran toward the voice.

He rounded a corner and saw a young girl who couldn’t have possibly been more than thirteen huddled against a mausoleum wall. She had long blonde hair that was so light it appeared white and even at his distance he could see fear written in her pale ice blue eyes.

He looked around to see what was terrorizing her. He felt it before he got the chance to see it. He fell to the ground from a blow to the back of his head. He rolled over and looked at the figure hovering above him. Spike stared at it as it stood over him with a predator’s eye.

The creature was huge, and bore a resemblance to a Fyarl demon but it wasn't, not with the mouthful of vicious teeth. Spike made a move to stand but was pulled up by the creature at the collar of his shirt.

Spike struggled to free himself from the creature's grasp but failed. The demon threw him to a nearby tree, which made a sickening crack with his impact. Spike fell to the ground with a thud. The demon was stronger than he anticipated.

The demon walked toward Spike, expecting an easy kill. Spike quickly swiped the demon’s legs out from under it and watched with glee as it fell unexpectedly to the ground. With the demon struggling to get back to his feet, Spike got up and (wanting to end the fight quick) grabbed the back of its head and with one quick twist, snapped its neck. It fell to the ground, dead.

Spike looked at the demon, a satisfied expression on his face. Remembering the girl, he wiped the look off and turned to the frightened girl. She still sat huddled against the mausoleum wall.

Spike moved toward her slowly, trying not to scare her anymore than she already was. “Pigeon?” he whispered, trying to get her attention. She moved slightly at his voice but still refused to look directly at him. He tried stepping toward her a few more steps but then felt himself being thrown to the ground again.

“Bloody hell,” he mumbled as he looked at the girl. She hadn’t moved an inch. He got up and tried again, only this time he stayed further away. “Pet, the demon’s dead. It’s not gonna hurt you. I’m not gonna hurt you. Just put the field down and I’ll take you home.”

This time, the girl looked at him. She studied his face as if she was trying to decided whether or not to believe him. “No,” she whispered. “You’re really not.” With a small wave of her hand, the field came down.

With her safety net down, Spike stepped toward the girl. “Hey, pigeon. My name’s Spike. What’s yours?” He reached down and helped her to her feet.

“Rinoa,” she said, more confidence in her answer.

“So, care to tell me what a girl like you is doing in the middle of the cemetery at night?” Spike asked.

Rinoa shrugged. “I was on my way home. I told them I’d be okay by myself for a little while.” A small giggle escaped her lips. “Guess I was wrong.”

“Who are they, pet?”

“My friends,” she replied simply.

Spike nodded. “Well, let me take you home. Least I can do.”

She shook her head. “No need to.” Spike closed his eyes as a new sensation filled his body. It felt as though he was floating. He opened his eyes when the feeling vanished and saw a smile on Rinoa’s face. “We’re already here,” she said.

Spike looked at the surrounding houses. They weren’t there a minute ago; they were in the cemetery. “How did you-?” Spike asked the young girl.

Rinoa preferred keeping the question unanswered. “Well, thanks for the saving. I’ll be seeing you,” she said, then left Spike alone as she entered her house.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike opened the door to the hotel; the Hyperion. He had acquired it after Angel left about fifty years ago. It struck Spike as odd that he would leave without so much as a location so Spike could contact him. So, Spike found himself in charge of Angel Investigations.

Spike moved from the front door to the wide open lobby that was the central core of his - Angel’s - operation. He looked to the front desk, to see a woman standing, gazing at the notes one of his associates left out.

“Can I help you, pet?” Spike asked her, taking her as a client who needed his expertise.

She chose to ignore his questions, instead speaking of something else entirely. “You came to see me today.”

Spike interrupted her. “No, luv, you got me mistaken for someone else.”

The small woman kept her gaze on the notes as she continued. “You used to come all the time, but then you just stopped.” There was a slight pause in her speech. “I missed your voice,” she whispered. “And in case you were wondering,” she said as she finally turned to face him. “I heard everything you said.”

Spike found himself staring at the sight before him. One hundred and fifty years can make the memory of a person fade but not her. Her memory, her face, remained permanently etched in his mind forever, especially since he still kept her picture by his bedside. “Buffy?” he asked quietly, almost afraid he was seeing things. That she wasn’t really here.

“Hello, Spike.”

Chapter Two

Spike had remained in the same position for several minutes as the woman who resembled and acted like Buffy wandered around the lobby, glancing at the various weapons and artifacts that were about.

“You changed your hair,” she commented on his brown curls with bleached tips. “I like it.”

Spike finally found his voice. “Buffy is it really you?”

She smiled. “Yes, Spike, it’s really me. I’m not a figment or...something trying to control you. I’m really me,” she told him.

Spike was surprised to feel tears pricking his eyes. Shamefully, he went to swipe them away but Buffy sopped him by placing her hands over his. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “Let it out.”

Hearing her voice again brought on the tears again. Buffy pulled his head to her shoulder and held him as he vent his emotions. Spike wrapped his arms around her small waist and held her tightly against him as though she were his lifeline.

They held each other for several minutes before Spike sank to the ground with Buffy, exhausted. She held him as he began to fall asleep, the day’s events draining him.

~~~~

Spike opened his eyes slowly. He looked around and found that he was on the sofa in the hotel lobby. “Buffy?” he asked, aloud, wondering of it had been a dream.

There was no answer.

Spike sighed as he sat up. So, it had been a dream. One of those where every sight, sound, smell and touch feel so real yet vanishes the second you wake. Spike ran his hands over his face.

“You’re awake,” he heard her voice again. Spike jerked his hands away from his face and looked to the sound of her voice. It was Buffy. She was here...or was she? “You thought it was a dream.” It was a statement rather than a question.

“The thought had crossed my mind,” Spike said, getting off the sofa and stood. “Now, for the questions.”

Buffy almost winced that the harsh tone that had crawled into his voice but shook it off and feigned ignorance. “Shoot.”

“Why are you here?” He asked. “Last I checked, you were dead. One hundred and fifty years dead.”

Buffy couldn’t hide her flinch to those words. She tore her eyes from his and turned her back toward him. “Buffy, luv, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say it like that,” he whispered, regretting his lack of tact and hostility.

“What do you want me to say, Spike? I don’t know why I’m here. I remember dying. I remember hearing your voice when you spoke to me. All I know is they told me I was needed here,” she finished, turning back to face him.

“Who’s they?” Spike asked.

She shrugged. “I don’t know. The Powers? I don’t know. Your guess is as good as mine.”

The two of them stood in silence, wondering what to say. It had been so long since they last saw each other. With the silence growing more and more awkward, Buffy decided to break it.

“I missed you. It’s been, what? Three years, my time?” She whispered.

“I missed you, too, luv,” Spike told her.

“You didn’t have to leave, Spike,” she said, looking up at Spike, tears threatening to fall.

Spike sighed. He looked to the ground. “Yeah, I did, Buffy.”

Buffy looked at him, pain lacing through her body. She opened her mouth to answer but nothing came out. She didn’t know what to say. So, the silence set in again.

The front door opened and the Buffy and Spike looked to the new occupants in the room. There was a young woman and a young man. The woman had long blonde hair held back in a ponytail and her body was adorned in tight black leather and in her hand was a box. The tall, lanky man had short brown hair and had a brown bag in his hand.

“Good morning, Spike,” the woman said. “We come bearing yummy doughnut goodness.”

“And blood,” the man said, holding the bag up for Spike to see.

“Thanks, mate,” Spike said. “Just put it in the fridge.”

The man went to his task. The woman put the doughnuts on the counter and looked to Spike and his visitor. “Who’s this? New client?” she asked.

Spike shook his head. “No, this is...Buffy.” he looked to Buffy. “An old friend.”

Buffy looked to the ground at his casual description of their relationship. It was much more complex than that. Much more so. “Buffy, this is Azure. And the guy back there is Kevin.”

“Hi,” Buffy said, feeling a little out of place.

“Hey,” Azure greeted. Kevin waved to her as he went to work on the computer.

“Why don’t we finish talking in my office, Buffy. Azure, Kev, I haven’t had time to check the messages. See if we got a new case,” Spike said.

“You got it,” Kevin said, behind the desk.

Spike opened the office door and let Buffy in before following and closing it behind him. He watched Buffy as she looked around the office. She then turned to face him. “This is Angel’s hotel, right?”

Spike nodded. “Was, actually.” Off her confused look, “He left some fifty years ago, put me in charge of his little business. Don’t know where he is.”

Buffy accepted the explanation without question. Things between the two souled-vampires had obviously changed within the last century.

They stood in silence before Spike decided it was time to cut to the chase and start the talk they so desperately needed. “Buffy, luv, we need to talk.”

“We do?” she asked, feigning ignorance.

Spike slammed his fist onto his desk, startling Buffy. “Damn it, Buffy! Stop pretending we don’t have to work things out.”

“I know we do. There’s a lot to say...and I’m not entirely sure how to say it,” she told him, not daring to look into the eyes of a man she didn’t recognize anymore.

Spike went around his desk and sat down. He crossed his arms behind his head and stared at her with harsh eyes. “Just bloody well say it, Slayer, or leave.”

His flippant behavior about their past angered her to no extent. “Why?” she asked, resentment leaking into her voice. “I don’t owe you anything. I didn’t leave you. You left me.”

His anger got the better of him and he was in her face so quickly she couldn’t blink. “You didn’t give me a choice. I had to leave. Out relationship - if you could even call it that - was destroying you...again.”

Buffy shook her head. “No, it wasn’t,” she whispered.

“Oh, stop it, luv. Stop lying to me. I saw it,” he spoke in a softer voice. “I saw how you kept pulling away from me. How you never told anyone about us. I left for your own good.”

“You didn’t give me a chance,” she said, tears threatening to fall. “You just left. Just like that. You didn’t give me a chance to tell you.”

Spike stepped away from her and sat on the edge of his desk. “Tell me what?”

Buffy gave a trembling sigh and looked away.

“Buffy? Tell me what?” he pressed.

“That I was - I was pregnant when you left,” she said softly, a tear falling from her face.

Spike stared at her, shocked by the new revelation.

“That’s why I kept pulling away. I was scared. It’s not supposed to happen. I’m the Slayer. I’m not supposed to fall in love with a vampire, souled or not, and I’m sure as hell am not supposed to get pregnant by one,” she explained to him while he sat dumbfounded. After her tirade, she just looked at him, waiting for him to reply. Any response would do...at least she would know whether or not he believed her.

Finally, she got a response. “They never said anything,” Spike said, shock in his voice.

“Who?”

“Them...the Scoobies...they never...they never told me...when I-I came back after I-I heard...about y-you,” he stumbled over the words, trying to make sense of the whole situation.

Buffy sighed. “Of course they wouldn’t,” she told herself. She stepped closer to him. “I tried to find you...but I couldn’t. I should have told you when I found out...but...”

Spike snapped out of his shocked phase. “Tell me about it...please,” his voice was hoarse with unshed tears.

Buffy smiled as she remembered their child. “It was a little girl...called her Raine. She had your eyes. You wouldn’t have been able to deny her,” Buffy paused, a tear falling down her face. “She was so smart...and intuitive.” Buffy moved to sit next to Spike on his desk before continuing her story. Spike sat listening intently. “One day, we were going home and got attacked by a demon...I died protecting her. I’m not sure if she made it...God, I hope so...”

Spike looked to the small woman who had tears falling freely down her face. He reached up and brushed them away. She smiled slightly. “I am so sorry, luv. I never should have left.”

Buffy shook her head. “You shouldn’t blame yourself, Spike. You didn’t know.”

“Doesn’t matter. I should have been there,” he said, pulling Buffy into his arms. She relaxed against him and sighed. “Are you tired, luv?”

She nodded. “A little bit.”

Spike stood and helped her stand. “Let’s get you a room. We can finish talking later.”

They exited the office and Azure and Kevin looked at them. “Azure, kitten, can you show Buffy to a room where she can stay?” Spike asked his associate.

She nodded and bounced off her chair. “This way.” She led Buffy to the second floor and to an empty room.

“You can stay here. It’s got everything you could ask for: a bed, running water, etc,” Azure told her, opening the door.

“Thanks,” Buffy said, entering the room but Azure stopped her.

“Did Spike say something to make you cry like that? If he did, want me to beat him up for ya?” Azure asked with a gleam in her eye.

Buffy shook her head. “No, we were talking about the past...”

Azure nodded. “You’re the Buffy from Sunnydale, right? 150 years ago?” Buffy nodded, confused on how the girl knew about her. As if reading her expression, Azure continued. “Spike used to always talk about you...that, and he has your picture next to his bed...Well, see you later.”

Buffy watched as the girl walked away before entering the room.

End Leur Amour

Chapter 3

Buffy looked around the room that was given to her. It wasn’t much but it would do. It had to. She sighed as she sat on the full-sized bed. Azure’s parting words filled her head. He “used to always talk about you.” Used to? What the hell did that mean? He just stopped? Buffy shook her head, embarrassed at herself. Of course, he would stop thinking of her. It had been over a century after all. She knew his would have moved on eventually. She wanted him to.

Right now, she had more important things to think about.

Like how the hell she got there.

Of course, the question probably would never be answered...or at least for a while. Buffy knew she should just be glad that she was back; to have the chance to see Spike again but, part of her was scared at what it could mean.

Buffy sighed. Too much thinking can’t be good, she thought to herself. She laid back on the bed and closed her eyes. She really was tired. Too much for one....morning, was it? Felt longer. Sleep came and she hoped her dreams wouldn’t be of bad memories. But then, she knew they probably would be. They usually were.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy released her daughter and they started to the car again. They rounded a corner and ran right into a demon. (AN: Insert your own description...I can’t come up with one...).

End Ses Mémoires

Spike watched as Azure led Buffy to a room. He sighed. It had been a long time. A long time since he saw her last, heard her voice. He never realized how much he regretted leaving her until now. But it was too late to change it.

Spike re-entered his office and sat at his desk, leaning back in the chair, arms crossed behind his head. There was a knock at the door.

“Yeah?” He asked his visitor, sitting up in the chair.

Kevin poked his head through the door. “You alright, man?”

“Yeah, why?” Spike asked.

Kevin shrugged. “It’s just that I’ve never seen a case have this effect on you. You’re usually so...cool.”

“Buffy’s not a ‘case,’” Spike reiterated his comment from earlier. “She’s just...I don’t know. She’s Buffy. Unless you wanna try ‘n figure out why she’s here, she just Buffy.”

“Okay,” Kevin said, knowing better than to pry into the vampire’s reasoning. He turned and left Spike in peace.

Spike sighed as the door closed. He leaned back in the chair again, and closed his eyes. He thought of Buffy and their past, trying to figure out what went wrong. He always surprised himself with the fact that these memories never left his mind. They were always on the surface of his brain, all he had to do was close his eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike snapped out his memories of the past. He was brooding and that was never good. Always got him into trouble.

He sighed and got up from his desk. He left his office, passing Kevin and Azure without a word, and went up the stairs to the second floor.

“Geez. What’s up with him? He’s so quiet,” Kevin remarked from the computer, watching the vampire leave his sight.

Azure gave him a dubious look. “Man, where have you been? That girl was Buffy,” she said as though she was talking to a child.

“So he said.”

“The Buffy,” she said. “The love of his unlife,” she told her friend.

“But she’s dead. Has been for a long time,” Kevin replied.

“Come on, Kev. How long have you been in this business? Stranger things have happened. Why she’s here is anyone’s guess, but right now, that’s all that matters to Spike. And whatever matters to Spike, matters to me.”

Spike quietly opened the door to Buffy’s room. She was asleep. He entered quietly and closed the door behind him.

He stepped closer to the bed and looked at her. God, how he missed her. Spike moved to lay down beside her. He pulled her into his arms, wanting to hold her, make sure she was real. She squirmed a little in her sleep and he paused, not wanting to wake her. A second later, she relaxed in his hold and he tightened his grip. Spike closed his eyes and let sleep come to him.

Spike woke to the feel of Buffy stirring in her sleep. He watched as her face contorted in pain and fear, indicating a nightmare.

“Buffy, luv, wake up,” Spike tried to wake her. He shook her shoulders slightly. She moaned and pulled away from him. “Buffy?” She had opened her eyes and was breathing heavily. “Pet, what’s wrong?”

Buffy turned to face him, a confused expression on her face. “What are you doing here?” She asked, evading the question, still panting.

“Sleeping,” he answered simply. “Now, what’s wrong?”

“I remember,” she said quietly after some time, sitting up in the bed and pulling her legs to her chest. She appeared small and vulnerable to him now. A look he did not particularly like on her.

“Remember what?” Spike asked, pulling himself to a sitting position as well.

“What happened...” she paused and cast a glance toward Spike before continuing. “What happened that night. What happened to Raine.”

“Yeah?”

“She fell into the portal...At least I think she did. It looked like she did. God, I hope she didn’t. Who knows where it would’ve taken her? She’s only three years old, Spike. What if-What if-”

Spike cut her off by grabbing hold of her shoulders and turning her so she faced him. “Buffy, calm down. There’s no way we can tell what happened. We...you have to try and get past it. Don’t let it bring you down.”

“’Don’t let...’ How can you say that? She was your daughter, too,” Buffy replied, appalled by Spike’s comments.

“Luv, it’s in the past,” he tried to explain to no avail.

“In the past, for you maybe. But not me. I raised her. Alone. You weren’t there, Spike. You know nothing about her.”

Her words, however true, stung and Spike released his grip on her and watched as she got up and left the room.

He laid back down on the bed, disgusted with himself. How could he be so heartless? Of course she would be worried about Raine, she was a mother after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy wandered the streets of Los Angeles. She was surprised, even after all the years, it hadn’t changed much. She half-expected to see flying cars zooming around the city. But it seemed technological advances had slowed down dramatically. Perhaps she would ask Spike about it later.

Spike.

Buffy froze at her internal mention of the vampire. He had hurt her with his remarks about Raine. How could he be so flippant about their daughter? The life that never should have been.

She sighed as she took a seat on a bench next to a park. This Spike was so different from the man she fell in love with. The years had changed him.

“Buffy?” A voice said behind her, interrupting her internal musings.

Buffy turned to face a young girl of about thirteen with white hair. “Yeah? Do I know you?”

The girl smiled. “No, not really. I’m Rinoa.” She took a seat next to Buffy.

“Then how do you know who I am?” Buffy asked the young girl.

Rinoa shrugged. “Call it...intuition,” she replied slyly. “You know Spike, right?” She asked, changing the subject.

“Yeah, why?”

“He saved my life the other day. I kinda need to talk to him...you know, thank him and all that,” Rinoa explained.

“I can take you to him if you want. Besides, I’d better get back before he sends the group after me,” Buffy said, standing and led the way back to the Hyperion.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy and Rinoa walked into the lobby of the hotel. There was no one in sight. Buffy sighed. “I hope they didn’t go looking for me,” she mumbled. “Hello?” She called out in the hopes that at least one of them stayed behind.

A brunette head poked out of one of the offices. Kevin, Buffy remembered his name. He was probably the book worm of the group...at least, he gave off that vibe. “Hey, Buffy, is it?” He asked.

Buffy nodded. “Is Spike around?”

“Yeah, in the basement,” Kevin answered before heading back to the books. Oh, yeah, he was the brains of the operation.

Buffy looked to Rinoa. “You wanna stay up here while I get him or come with?”

“I’ll come with,” she replied and the two of them went down to the expanse known as the basement.

It took Buffy and Rinoa a few minutes of exploring the large basement before they found the room where Spike was. And they only found it because Spike’s voice carried throughout the entire floor.

Buffy opened the door to reveal Spike and Azure sparring with Spike gaining the upper-hand.

“C’mon, Slayer, you can do better than that,” Spike taunted Azure, who had been knocked to the floor.

Azure smiled up at Spike furtively before sweeping Spike’s legs out from under him. He landed hard on his back and Azure went to straddle him, holding a stake to his heart. Spike froze as though he thought she would dust him. Azure began to giggle as she got off his chest. “Heh, I win,” she said happily.

Spike got up from his position on the ground. “Yeah, barely,” he mumbled.

Azure didn’t let his comment bring her down. “You’re just mad ‘cause you lost.”

“Whatever,” he said and looked to the door, noticing Buffy and Rinoa for the first time since they set foot in the room. “Buffy?”

“Yeah, I, uh, ran into this girl. Said she needed to talk to you,” Buffy said, trying to keep the jealously from growing in her. The position she caught the two of them in was very reminiscent of her and Spike.

“Rinoa? How’d you get here? Last I saw you, you were in Sunnyhell,” Spike asked the girl.

“Um, teleported?” She replied. Off Spike’s raised eyebrow: “What? I was raised by a witch, what do you expect?” Spike continued his look as he sensed her fib. Rinoa rolled her eyes; obviously she couldn’t lie to him. “Okay. I took the bus.”

Buffy watched as Spike and Rinoa begin their conversation before leaving the room, suddenly feeling a little out of place. Azure followed her.

“Buffy, are you okay?” She asked as they rounded the corner.

Buffy stopped and looked at Azure. “I’m fine, why?” She replied, crossing her arms over her chest.

“It’s just that...You seem... I don’t know. A little upset,” Azure explained.

“Spike and I had an argument...again,” Buffy replied, letting her guard down a little.

“Again? You haven’t even been here and entire day yet.”

“Well, we have a lot to work through.”

The two began to make their way back upstairs. “So, you’re the Slayer?” Buffy asked the girl at her side, breaking the silence.

Azure nodded. “Yup. Learned everything I know from Spike.”

There was a brief moment of silence before Buffy asked, “Azure, can I ask a personal question?”

“Yeah, shoot.”

“It’s really none of my business but-”

“Buffy, what is it?”

“You and Spike...you two aren’t, like, together, are you?” Buffy asked, bringing up her jealousy surreptitiously.

“A world of no,” Azure replied. “Spike practically raised me. Found me when I was about eleven. I don’t remember a day without him. He’s kinda been my father in a way.”

“Oh,” Buffy replied, both thankful and embarrassed. “I was just curious.”

“It’s okay.”

Once upstairs, the two women took a seat on the sofa and sat in silence, a common occurrence.

“It’s not possible,” Spike’s voice broke the stillness as he apparently made his way upstairs.

“But it is,” Rinoa’s voice followed his.

The two Slayers shared a look of confusion as Spike and Rinoa appeared in the lobby.

“I’m tellin’ ya. It’s a physical impossibility,” Spike was repeatedly refuting whatever Rinoa was saying.

“Believe me, I know it’s impossible, Spike, but I’m telling you, it’s true. You are my father.”

The silence was deafening. Buffy kept shifting her gaze between Rinoa and Spike, wondering what had brought this up...what made this girl firmly believe it. Azure stared at Rinoa, wondering what the hell was going through that head of hers. Kevin had come up from his hiding spot at the sudden lack of sound in the lobby, wondering what had been said.

Spike’s voice finally broke the silence. “What makes you think I’m your father, ducks?”

Rinoa began to fidget under all the eyes staring at her, waiting for the answer. “I just - I feel it. Plus, I kinda did a spell,” she confessed.

“Spell? You mess with black magicks?” Kevin broke into the conversation, clearly curious about the young girl and her power, as well as clearly uninformed about the topic of the conversation.

“No, I only use white magick. The black magicks are too dangerous,” Rinoa replied to him, breaking her attention from Spike.

Kevin nodded. “Okay. Cool.”

“Okay, - So, you did a spell,” Spike brought the conversation back on track. “Still, not possible.”

“Spike, that’s not entirely true,” Buffy whispered. Spike turned to her, reading her facial expression, knowing what she was talking about.

“Okay, true, but I haven’t been with another woman in years. Not since Buffy,” Spike stated. “Well, unless you count that girl last month, but I was drunk,” he confessed, avoiding Buffy’s gaze.

“Well, let’s see,” Azure broke into the conversation. “For those of us who kinda just tuned in or just totally confused, Rinoa did a spell that told her Spike here was her daddy. Spikey-boy says ‘no, not possible ‘cause a) he a vampire and b) he ain’t slept with anyone in over one hundred years.” She looked to Kevin. “Sounds like one for the books.”

“Agreed,” Kevin said before going back to his office, with Azure following.

“Rinoa, what makes you so certain that Spike’s your father? I mean, what about your parents at home?” Buffy asked.

Rinoa shrugged. “I was adopted by a wicca. Never kept it a secret. She told me it was time to find my parents so I did the spell, confirming what I already believed and then I made my way here.”

“Well, what about your mother? Where is she?” Buffy continued the interrogation.

“I remember...I remember what she looked like from when I was a baby. Now, I’m waiting to see if she recognizes me,” Rinoa said, a smile on her face.

“You mean you already found her?” Spike asked.

“Yup, she’s....she’s in the vicinity.”

“Vicinity? Vicinity of what?” Buffy asked.

“L.A.,” Rinoa answered simply.

“Who is she?” Spike asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

“Now, Dad, one thing at a time. You’ll find out,” Rinoa answered cryptically. She then sat down on the couch and yawned, stretching out her arms.

“Rinoa, listen, pigeon, you can rest in here. You look tired. Buffy and I need to have a talk,” Spike told the girl while tugging at Buffy’s arms and leading her to his office.

Rinoa stretched out on the couch and let herself drift off, a small smile on her face.

Spike waited until Buffy closed the door before speaking. “There is no way that girl is my daughter,” he said loudly.

“Spike, calm down, she’ll hear you,” Buffy tried to calm the pacing vampire.

“This-” He quieted his voice. “This is not possible,” he continued his motto of the night.

“Again, I’d tell you that’s not entirely true but you won’t listen,” Buffy muttered to herself. She took a deep breath before speaking aloud. “Spike, whatever you believe is not the issue here.” Spike raised an eyebrow. “There is a girl in there who truly believes that you are her father. Now, we need to see if it’s true, not go about disputing it without any explanation,” she explained.

“But I haven’t been with anyone...not since you.”

“What about that girl last month?” She couldn’t help the jealous tone that had seeped into her voice.

“Buffy, I was drunk. Not to mention, that was last month. That girl is a helluva lot older than that, luv.”

Buffy sighed. She knew that she was reaching, she just couldn’t help but mention the nameless woman. “Maybe there was a spell, you know, making her develop a lot faster, or - or maybe she’s from a different dimension. One where you’re human and have lots of kids, or may-maybe she’s from the future.” Spike raised his eyebrow again, which was becoming a common sight. “It could be your soul. Giles never did figure out why Raine came about. He just figured that maybe your soul, you know, made you, you know...”

Spike nodded. “Which would work if I had been with someone ‘bout 13 years ago. Wasn’t.”

“Okay...I don’t know. But there has to be an explanation somewhere.”

“I’ll agree with you on that one, pet.” He stopped his pacing and sat on the edge of his desk. “Today has been...I don’t know. First, you mysteriously reappear, then I find out I had a daughter and now, possibly another one.”

Buffy let a small smile cross her features as she stood in front of him. “It has been a wild one, huh?”

“And then to top it all, I already managed to hurt you...twice,” he whispered. “Didn’t want to.”

Buffy caught his eye and held it. “Spike,” she spoke softly. “I know you didn’t mean to. I know.”

They held each other’s gaze before Spike spoke again. “God, I missed you.”

Buffy stepped closer to him and rested her forehead against his. Spike wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her to him. “I love you,” she whispered. “I never stopped.”

Spike felt his undead heart clench at her words. It had been so long since he heard her say them to him. So long since he heard them from anyone. He pulled away slightly to captured her lips in a tender kiss, which only grew in intensity. Buffy brought her hands to the back of his neck, holding him to her, while Spike’s arms tightened around her. They let all the emotions that had been concealed by the years pour into the kiss, deepening it. Buffy reluctantly pulled away when oxygen became an issue. Spike moved to her throat, finding her pulse point and slightly nipped at it, eliciting a moan from her.

“Spike,” she said breathlessly. “We can’t...not now,” she protested weakly.

“Why not?” he murmured against her neck.

“Well, for one, this really isn’t the place for this...”

“Never stopped us before.”

Buffy ignored his comment. “...and two, there is a young girl out there and I don’t really want to give her a lesson about the birds and the bees...”

Spike pulled away and looked out the office window. “She’s asleep. Besides, we can close the blinds and lock the door.”

Buffy looked from Spike to the young girl, obviously considering whether or not to take him up on his offer. Finally, she shook her head. “Later,” she said with a smile. Spike returned her smile and kissed her. “I’m gonna hold you to that,” he said.

“Right now, we have work to do,” Buffy said, reluctantly pulling herself out of his grasp.

Spike stood and ran a hand through his dark roots. “You’re right. Let’s go see how Azure and Kevin are doing.” Spike took Buffy’s hand and led her to Kevin’s office, the home of all the mythological books.

“Hey, you guys need help?” Spike asked when he opened the door.

Azure shrugged. “We might’ve found something.”

Spike and Buffy sat in the two chairs across from the desk. “And what might that something be?” Spike asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“A prophecy,” Kevin said, not looking up from the musty book he was reading.

“Yeah?”

“Says something about a vampire and a slayer from the past,” Azure started. “One that died three times.”

“Guess that’d be you, luv,” Spike said to Buffy.

“Yup, guess so. What else does it say?”

“Umm, thrice the Slayer shall perish and twice she shall be born and twice she shall be born again,” Kevin said slowly, translating aloud. “On the day of the second birth, she shall find the star of the dove.”

“‘Star of the Dove?’ What’s that mean? ” Spike asked, confused.

Kevin shrugged. “I don’t know. It doesn’t say. Just kinda ends there.”

“Great. Always loved those prophecies and their crypticness,” Buffy muttered.

“The Dove? That could be anything, couldn’t it?” Azure asked, upset at the vagueness of the passage.

“Doves are usually seen as a sign for peace. Maybe it’s supposed to bring some kind of peace between the Slayer and something else,” Kevin supplied.

“Raine,” Buffy said out of the blue, causing all eyes to turn to her.

“What about her, pet?”

“Don’t know if it means anything but she, umm, she had this little birthmark on the left side of her neck. Looked kinda like a star to me. Maybe...” she shook her head. “Never mind...she’s dead,” Buffy whispered the last part.

Spike looked at her. That was the first time he head her use those words in juxtaposition with Raine. Her eyes had clouded over with tears that remained unshed.

Silence took the office as everyone thought about the ‘star,’ wondering what it could possibly be. Azure, then, stood and left the office. The others watched her out of curiosity as she made her way to a sleeping Rinoa. Azure looked at the sleeping girl before carefully brushing back her hair, revealing the left side of her neck. “Hey, Buffy, did it look like this?”

Buffy stood and made her way to Rinoa and Azure. She looked down at the girl sleeping on the couch. Azure pointed out the mark on the side of her neck. Buffy couldn’t contain her gasp. “Oh, my God...”

Spike and Kevin exited the office as they saw Buffy back away from Rinoa, a hand to her mouth in shock. Spike went to Buffy. “Luv, what...?”

“That’s Raine...” She stated softly.

Buffy stared at the young girl, still sleeping oblivious to everything that had occurred. The girl that was her daughter. But it couldn’t be, could it? Raine was born over 150 years ago...she would’ve died a long time ago. Unless...she fell through the portal and it brought her here...maybe...but...

She ran. Buffy did the only thing she could think to do. She ran...the hotel flying behind her.

“Buffy,” Spike called after her, careful not to wake Rinoa. She started after her, thankful that the sun had set several hours ago.

“Spike - wait,” Azure caught up with him, grabbing his arm to stop him. Spike looked at her, a questioning look on his face. “What do we tell her?”

Spike looked to the sleeping girl. “Tell her...don’t tell her anything. Not until we have definite proof.”

Azure nodded and let go of his arm. “Go on. Go find her.”

Spike nodded before taking after Buffy.

Azure sighed before turning back to Kevin, who had remained silent. “We should get her into a real bed.”

Kevin nodded. “Yeah, why don’t you do that...I’m gonna see if...if I can find anything else...” he said, heading back to his books, his escape from the crazy world.

“Okay...” Azure whispered, turning to the girl. She moved to sit on the edge of the couch. “Hey, Rinoa,” she said, gently, not wanting to startle her.

Rinoa, however, jerked awake. “I’m awake...I wasn’t sleeping,” she said out of reflex.

“It’s getting kinda late,” Azure told her. “I was thinking you might wanna sleep in an actual bed.”

Rinoa sat up and nodded. “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.”

“Okay, follow me,” Azure led the girl up the stairs and into one of the rooms that was livable.

Spike didn’t have to go far to find Buffy; she never left the premises of the hotel. He found her sitting on the edge of the fountain that rose up in the middle of the courtyard.

“Pet?” Spike asked as he came closer to her.

Buffy looked back as she heard his voice. He frowned when he saw tears in her eyes. “Luv, what’s wrong?” He kneeled down in front her.

Buffy shook her head. “I had gotten used to the idea that she was...dead, then...then she had to...”

Spike gripped her hand and moved his other hand to caress her face. “Buffy, we don’t even know for a fact if Rinoa really is Raine. We need to look into it more before we start jumping to conclusions,” Spike rationalized, sounding very much like Giles.

Buffy nodded and wiped the tears away from her face. “You’re right.”

Spike leaned in and kissed her. “Why don’t we head upstairs, luv,” he suggested, a glimmer in his eye.

Buffy caught his innuendo and smiled. “Okay.”

Spike stood and pulled Buffy up. He wrapped an arm around her waist and led her upstairs.

Spike took Buffy to his room and closed the door behind them. Buffy turned to face him and was immediately attacked by his lips. She gasped in surprise and Spike took advantage of this and let his tongue slip in. Buffy recovered and responded to the kiss heatedly, her tongue dueling with his.

Spike moved her against the wall. Buffy used this to her advantage, jumping up into his arms, locking her legs around his waist. Spike pulled away from the kiss, allowing Buffy to catch her breath. He moved his lips to her throat, nipping slightly at her pulse point causing her to moan slightly.

Spike’s lips trailed down to the valley between her breasts, teasing, before claiming her lips once again. He slowly began to unbutton her blouse, exposing her to him. “Spike...” she breathed. He reached behind her and unhooked her bra, letting it fall to the floor. Buffy moved her hands to pull off his shirt, allowing his head, muscled chest to be seen under her hungry gaze.

Spike moved Buffy to the bed and set her down. He hovered above her. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him close to her. He kissed her full on the lips.

“Spike...please, I need you...now...” she moaned into the kiss.

It was all he needed as he rid himself of his clothing and her of hers and set to making love to her...

Spike and Buffy laid spooned together, Spike keeping his arm tight around her waist. Buffy sighed and snuggled further into his arms. Spike breathed deeply in her hair, taking in her scent of vanilla.

“What are you thinking about, pet?” Spike asked quietly.

“Honestly?”

“Yeah.”

“I...I was thinking - wondering - what if she really is our baby?” She asked in a small voice, turning in his arms to face him.

Spike remained silent for a minute before speaking. “We’ll figure it out when we get there, luv. We just need to know for a fact before we do anything rash.”

“And then what?”

“We’ll see, luv.” Spike leaned in to kiss her forehead. “Now, let’s get some sleep.” He closed his eyes allowing himself to drift off, still holding Buffy to him as though he was afraid she would fade away.

Hours later, Buffy laid in his arms, still wide awake. Nothing she tried helped her fall asleep. Counting sheep, thinking about the speeches Giles used to give...Nothing. She sighed and looked at her sleeping lover. He always could fall asleep no matter what had been going on. She sometimes envied him on that account.

Buffy slowly and quietly extracted herself from his grip, pausing when he moved slightly. Free from his arms, she leaned in and kissed his forehead. “Love you...” she whispered.

She found and pulled on Spike’s T-shirt over her head and found a pair of boxers in a chest of drawers. Apparently, he didn’t sleep in the nude anymore. Must’ve had one too many mishaps while was training Azure. Right now though, Buffy was thankful since she seriously needed to do some shopping of her own.

Buffy quietly trudged out the room and into the hall, making her way to the lobby. She didn’t know what she’d do down there but she was restless. Exploring the hotel might help pass the time.

“What are you doing up?” Buffy heard Rinoa’s voice down in the lobby.

Buffy reached the bottom of the stairs and found her nosing around behind the front counter. “I should ask you the same thing,” Buffy replied to her question.

Rinoa shrugged. “Woke up. Couldn’t get back to sleep.”

“So, you raid the counter?” Buffy asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I was bored. Besides, it’s not like I took anything. I’m not a klepto. That was Aunt Dawn’s deal,” Rinoa cut short, realizing she slipped.

Buffy blinked several times. Never once had they mentioned Dawn during the day so how could Rinoa know about her...unless... “Is it true?” Buffy asked, bracing herself for the answer. “Are you my daughter? Are you Raine?”

Rinoa looked up, to Buffy’s eyes, before answering. “Hi, Mom.”

Spike woke, feeling quite content and...alone. He instinctly reached out for Buffy but found nothing. He opened his eyes and glanced around his room, looking for a sign of her. Nothing. Spike sat up in the bed and glimpsed to the floor. He smiled at the sight of their scattered clothes. Memories flooded through him. Last night had been the best night he had in over one hundred years.

He stood and pulled on his jeans and grabbed another shirt from his closet after discovering that his had mysteriously went missing. Smiling, he headed down to the lobby to face the day.

Halfway down the flight of stairs he heard Buffy’s voice, followed by laughter from Rinoa. He stopped and watched to two of them unnoticed from his place on the stairs. It marveled him how alike the two of them were, in appearance and personality. They were talking about the Scoobies, who were long dead to Spike, but obviously not to his love and...daughter.

She had to be his daughter, right? They never once mentioned the gang of Slayerettes while she was there so how else could she know the intimate details they talked of?

“Wow, they really are alike, huh?” Azure’s voice came from behind him.

Spike glanced toward her then reverted his gaze back to Buffy and Rinoa. “That they are, pet,” he replied.

Silence flowed between the two of them as they watched mother and daughter talk about the past.

“I think...she has your eyes,” Azure commented after a few seconds.

Spike sighed before asking a question. “Azure, kitten, do you...uh...do you think she’s really our daughter?”

Azure let her gaze drift to Spike’s face, which was still glued to his family. “Personally, I’d be surprised if she wasn’t.”

“What makes you so certain?”

Azure shrugged, a smile on her face. “Call it a woman’s intuition.” Spike let a small smile cross his features. “Go to them, Spike.”

Spike turned toward the young slayer. Unexpectedly, he pulled her into a hug. “What would I do without you, Slayer?”

Azure returned to hug and smirked. “Well, for starters, you probably woulda been dusted long ago...”

“Yeah...you’re my anchor. You know that?” Azure nodded against his chest “And you’re mine,” she replied.

“Love you, pet,” Spike stated, placing a kiss on top of her head.

“Love ya, too,” she replied, releasing him from the hug to watch him go to his lover and their child.

Buffy looked over to Spike as he came down the stairs. She smiled at the sight of him, still disheveled from last nights events. He returned the smile and glanced to Rinoa, who also had a small grin on her face. Spike went to Buffy and gave her a chaste kiss.

“So, what you ladies talking about?” he asked, sitting next to Buffy.

Buffy and Rinoa shared a look, a smirk on their faces. “Girl talk,” they said, simultaneously, then both giggled.

Spike’s face broke out into a huge smile as he watched the two of them share an inside joke. They really were alike. So alike it was a little disturbing. But they made him happy. He finally had his family together. And nothing was going to stop him from enjoying it. He wouldn’t let it slip through his fingers again. Never again.

Azure looked on from her spot on the stairs. She felt a small smile tug at her lips. He was home. In all the years she had known him, never once had she seen him smile as brightly as he did now. She might have been his anchor, the one person who kept going the last ten years, but they were his family. His true family.

And try as she may, she couldn’t help but feel a tiny pang of jealousy toward Rinoa, not because she thought Spike would abandon her, no, he was her mentor, her watcher, her everything. It was because she knew she’d never have the chance to experience the same level of happiness.

She was a Slayer, a creature that lived in the darkness; death was her art, her skill, her gift. It was all she had ever known, all she could remember. It was all she had to offer.

Rinoa, she was the Dove. She brought peace with her. She was able to bring two people, who were desperately in love back together just by simply existing.

Azure watched as Spike, Buffy, and Rinoa shared stories of the past. She smiled briefly before turning and heading back to her room. She needed more rest before nightfall came so she could do what she was born to do.