Rating R (for sexual situations and language)

Description: A/U college fiction. Buffy moves far away to join her boyfriend William aka "Spike" at college. Things are going wonderfully for the couple and their tight nit group of friends when tragedy strikes. I'm not going to lie, this is going to be a pretty angsty story. However, I can promise that it will have a happy ending, and that's all I'm going to say.

Disclaimer: All characters relating to Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series are property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and Fox. This story is written for entertainment purposes only and not for profit. In other words I am nothing, I own nothing, I have nothing...Please don't sue me :-)

Here Without You

Chapter 1

One More Night

Elisabeth Anne Summers, or Buffy, as her friends and family called her, couldn't help but smile as she stared out the window of her mother’s Jeep Grand Cherokee. Life is good, she thought to herself, as she caught a glimpse of the black DeSoto that was following not too far behind them.

"What are you thinking about?" Joyce Summers asked, as she spied the ear-to-ear grin on her daughter's face.

"Nothing, really, just...excited, I guess," she replied, looking away from the window and towards her mother.

"I bet you are. You only move away to go to college once." Joyce paused for a moment, almost laughing at her daughter’s excitement. "But could you try not to look so happy about it. You're breaking your poor mother's heart over here," she finished with mock aggravation.

Buffy smiled at the joke, knowing that her mom was half serious. She then took her mother’s hand in hers and looked into her eyes. "I'm sorry, Mom. You know that I'm going to miss you more than anything. It's just that it's so exciting, so new, so not Sunnydale. Besides, you know that I'm going to call you everyday and then winter break will come and I'll be home and you can comfort yourself with lots of dirty laundry," Buffy pointed out with a mischievous look in her eyes.

"Ha, ha," Joyce replied and let go of her daughter’s hand to turn the wheel into the main entrance of the University of Georgia campus. "Well, here we are," Joyce sighed. "Do you know which one is yours?"

"Keep going straight," Buffy instructed, as she checked the rearview mirror again to make sure that the Black Desoto was still behind them. "Turn right here," Buffy told her mother, as they neared the entrance to her dorm. "This is it, Oglethorpe House."

Joyce pulled the car up to the front where other students were unloading luggage and parents were stealing hugs and snapping pictures. "I'm going to go get you checked in. Buffy, do your mom a favor and start unloading the things from the luggage rack," Joyce instructed, as she made her way into the dormitory. Before she started to unload the car, Buffy dashed over to the Black Desoto that had just pulled into a space in the packed lot. The door swung open and she heard a faint "Bloody Hell," as the person inside the car stepped out and stretched his arms. Her William. It never ceased to amaze Buffy how they had been together for three years, and even though his appearance had not changed in that time, looking at him still took her breath away. He was average height with bleached platinum blonde hair. His face held piercing blue eyes that, depending on what he was wearing, would sometimes appear to be gray. His face was long and he had sculpted cheekbones that danced when he smiled. His body was lean and muscular. Perfectly huggable, thought Buffy, as she watched him work out the tension from his shoulders.. "Hey, handsome," she finally called to him, making him turn around to face her.

"I thought we were never gonna sodding get here," he sighed, his British accent thick with exhaustion.

“What?" Buffy retorted. "It's not like you've never made the trip before, going back and forth for the past year." She wrapped her arms around his waist as she finished, and laid her head on his shoulder.

"Yeah, but I've never followed your mum down here before. Does driving incredibly slow come on with age? Because if so, I want preventative treatment now."

"Don't you start in on my mother." Buffy pushed William away from her and stuck a finger up at him in warning.

"Oh, yeah, your mother. She's brilliant," he continued.

Buffy opened her mouth to retaliate, but was interrupted when William scooped her back into his arms and brushed his lips lovingly against hers. "You know I'm only fooling, pet. I love your mum, even though she does drive like a friggin’..."

"Hello, William," Joyce interrupted, as she joined the two by his car.

"Good morning, Mrs. Summers," William replied, as Buffy buried her head in his chest trying to stifle a laugh.

"Did you have any trouble with the trip? I didn't lose you at all, did I?" Joyce asked.

"No, not at all. It was a lovely ride," William lied, trying to hide the sarcasm in his voice.

"Well, Buffy, let's get you moved in," Joyce sighed. "Where did you put the things from the top of the car?"

Shit! Buffy thought to herself. "Umm well I..." Buffy drifted off as she pointed to the still fully loaded car.

"Right," Joyce sighed. "William, do you mind?" she asked, rolling her eyes at her daughter, who now wore a sheepish grin on her face.

"At your service, Mrs. Summers." William started over to the car and began to untie the items that were stowed in the luggage rack, while Buffy and Joyce headed inside the building.

"Well, this is it," Buffy said, as she stopped in front of a large wooden door marked #120. "At least we didn't have to wait in line for the elevator. One of the many advantages of a first floor domicile." She smiled as she fiddled with the keys that she had just been given. She opened the door and stepped into the less than spacious room, observing her surroundings. There were side-by-side closets to the right of the door. A small dresser was pushed up against the adjoining wall. Opposite the closets, were two twin size wooden frame bunk beds. Two small wooden desks sat on the opposite side of the room. One desk was strategically placed facing out of the window that showed a view of the still busy parking lot. The other desk was directly opposite facing the other way, so if Buffy and her roommate were both sitting at their desks at the same time, they would be sitting with their backs to one another. The arrangement of the furniture made the room look much smaller than it actually was. It's okay, Buffy thought. We'll have a lot more room once we rearrange and get the loft put up.

"This is a bleeding disgrace," William said, as he came into the room. "Who lived here before...Oompa Loompas?" he asked, obviously unhappy with the size of the room.

"It's not that bad," Joyce chimed in. “It's practically a fortress compared to what the dorms were like when I was in college," she finished.

"It'll be better when it's fixed up, you'll see…" Buffy added, setting a box on the desk by the window, claiming it as hers. She turned around to face William as he was searching for a proper place for his armful. "Oompa Loompas?" Buffy asked with a sarcastic smile on her face.

"Well, yeah," William said, as he finally settled her things on the floor around her desk. "Creepy little buggers. Small, clown-like, and very disturbing." He took a moment to sit down on the bed and take a breather, as Joyce made her way into the bathroom to further explore. "So what are your plans, pet?"

"Plans?" Buffy asked.

"Yeah, plans to make our new home more home-like," William asked, unable to hide his ear-to-ear grin.

"Shhhhh," Buffy hushed him, quickly waving her hand in the air in a mad gesture. She then looked over to the door to the bathroom where her mother was still exploring. "She'll hear you," she whispered.

"What, you mean your mum doesn't know?" William asked, cocking his head to the side with a confused glare.

"Know what?" Joyce asked suspiciously, as she finally emerged from the other room.

Buffy tried to hide the look of terror on her face, not sure of how much of their conversation her mother had overheard. "That...William and Xander are going to be right across the hall," Buffy nodded, as she shrugged off the twinge of guilt. After all, it wasn't exactly lying. William was listed as living across the hall with Xander Harris, his longtime friend and fraternity brother. However, her mother had no idea that they were planning to switch roommates. William would live here with Buffy; Anya, Buffy's "roommate", would live with Xander, who happened to be her boyfriend of six and a half months. It seemed like the perfect plan. Buffy had deliberately not mentioned this to her mother, because she figured that it would be a good “get out of jail free” card for Unhappy Mom news. Hi, Mom, academic probation sure is fun. Guess what? William and I are living together, and have been since I left. Shitty grades don't seem like all that big of a deal now do they?

"Buffy," her mother exclaimed, waving a hand in front of her daughter’s face. "Have you been listening to anything I've been saying?" Joyce asked with a concerned look on her face.

"Umm, what? Oh, right...um...no." Buffy finally admitted.

Joyce shook her head and gave Buffy a worried look. "I was just saying how wonderful it is that William is going to be so close to you. I feel better knowing that you'll be looked after. I just want you to promise that you'll behave yourself," Joyce finished with a very serious tone and look on her face.

"Moooom!" Buffy exclaimed, embarrassed by her mother’s blatant statement. "They have R.A.’s on every floor, you know. Twenty four hour supervision, just like at home." Buffy nodded her head to emphasize her point.

"I'm being Paranoid Mom now, aren't I?" Joyce smiled at her daughter.

"A little." Buffy smiled and gave her mom a quick hug.

"Well, let's get the rest of your stuff from the car. I know that you're anxious to start decorating." Joyce stepped out of the room.

Buffy started to follow her, and looked over to William who had not moved from his spot on the bed. "Are you coming?" she asked him, holding the door open.

"You've got some explaining to do when we have some alone time," William said, as he started out the door.

"Oh, yay, something to look forward to after the manual labor. Be still my heart," Buffy said in a sarcastic tone. William smirked at the blonde and walked out of the room and back toward the car to help collect the rest of her things.

Two hours had passed. Joyce had said a tearful goodbye and Buffy was starting to unpack her belongings. William was again sitting on her bed watching her. "Why didn't you tell your mum that I'm moving in here?" William asked with a slightly hurt expression on his face.

"William, my mother has been an emotional train wreck ever since I started collecting college brochures. She would make with the major wiggins if I told her that I was planning on moving in with you and not with Anya. Please don't think that I don't want to live with you, I just didn't want to cause her any more grief than necessary. I'm going to tell her, I promise. Just let her get over the whole ‘my baby just left for college’ stage." Buffy had slowly made her way over to William and was now sitting in his lap. William wrapped his arms around her waist and laid his head down on her chest. She kissed the top of his head as she leisurely ran her hands through his hair. "Forgive me?" she whispered.

"You're not getting off that easy, pet," he breathed. “But it's a good start.” William flipped Buffy around so that her back was now on the bed and he was positioned on top of her. "But I could definitely think of some way you could make it up to me," William replied, arching an eyebrow and looking intensely into her eyes. William leaned in to kiss her softly. He ran his hands over the small of her back and was about to deepen their kiss when they heard the door to the room open.

"Oh, please don't let me interrupt," Anya chirped, as she stepped into the room. She had an overnight bag on her shoulder and one box with a few items stuffed inside. "Carry on with your pre-orgasmic activities."

"What the sodding hell are you doing here?" William asked, his aggravation towards the intrusion evident in his tone.

"I live here," Anya replied with a sarcastic smile on her face. Anya Jenkins had turned tormenting William into an art form. Buffy couldn't help but smile as she watched her friend tease him.

"Hey, Anya." Buffy wiggled her way out from under William and gave her friend a hug. "How was your trip?"

"Oh, frightfully dull," Anya replied with a bored expression. "That is until I got here. Looks like things were just starting to get interesting." Anya wagged her eyebrows at Buffy and both girls started to laugh hysterically. "I'll be right back," Anya said grunted through her laughter. "I'm just going to get the rest of my stuff," with that she disappeared into the hallway.

"Bloody hell," William muttered as he stood from the bed. Buffy turned around and saw the disappointed look in her boyfriend’s eyes and wrapped her arms around his waist. Her chin was resting on his chest as she looked straight up into his eyes.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"S'alright, pet. Just one more night apart." He smiled down at her.

"So, you're not disappointed at all?" she asked.

"I wouldn't go that far, but it's nothing I can't take care of myself," he said wagging his eyebrows at her.

"Thanks a lot!" she yelled, slapping him playfully across the chest.

"Sweet dreams, baby." William curled his tongue behind his front teeth as he smirked at his girlfriend, who was now flushed standing in front of him. He grabbed her to him and brushed his lips against hers, flicking out his tongue and begging for entrance.. She accepted him into her mouth, however, except for the passionate lingering kiss she was expecting, she was surprised when William lightly ran his tongue along the inside of her top lip and then quickly grabbed onto her bottom lip with his teeth, tugging at it lightly, teasing her. She moaned in protest when he pulled away. "Something to remember me by, luv." He smirked as he turned to open the door. He was stopped by a faint whisper. If it had been any softer, he wouldn't have heard it at all.

"I love you, William."

"One more night, pet."

With that, he let himself out of her room and quickly made his way to his car.

Chapter 2

Surrounding

The next morning was frantic and hurried. Xander and William arrived promptly at nine and the move had begun. The men were busy unloading the last piece of furniture from Xander's uncle's pick up truck, while the girls were inside swapping ideas and plans for decor.

"Answer me this," Xander grunted as he and William lifted a recliner and made their way to the entrance of the dormitory. "How is it that we have girlfriends who are all about the woo, and might I add a big hoo, when it comes to the pants wearing part of our relationships, but someone says ‘manual labor’ and it's fingernails and muscle spasms."

"It's the cross we bear, mate," William replied concentrating on his grip; "for being this athletic and good looking."

Xander smiled at his former roommate as they carried the chair down the hall and into William and Buffy's room. When they entered they were slightly surprised at what they saw. Buffy was asleep on her bed with her head on her pillow and her lower body angled so that her legs were dangling over the side touching the floor. Anya was laying in the top bunk with her head positioned at the foot of the bed, one arm dangling over the side as well as one leg. A brochure for the "Loft Guys" was sitting opened on Buffy's lap as she slept. William and Xander exchanged devilish grins and dropped the recliner with a loud thwack. The noise startled Buffy who sat straight up from the bed with a sheepish grin.

"Trying to hurt the chair?" Buffy asked, rubbing her sleepy eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry Pet, did we wake you?" William replied sarcastically.

"I guess we kinda dozed off," Buffy yawned as she lifted herself off of the bed stretching her tired muscles. "Sleepy," she added wrapping her arms around William's waist and laying her head on his shoulder.

"I can see how you would be." Xander replied, his voice dripping with derision. "I mean what with all the talking and planning."

"Sorry Xand," Buffy replied. "I'm a firm believer that men move the furniture and women have the babies."

Xander rolled his eyes at her, trying to keep himself from laughing. "Spike, are you listening to this, because if you are a little help would be appreciated?"

"Spike?" Buffy questioned looking around the room for the aforementioned party.

"You're on your own mate," William answered, silently noting Buffy's confused look. "At least Anya hasn't started in on you yet. "’Xander, don't you care about me?’" William mocked Anya, raising the pitch in his voice. "’We never talk.’"

"Shut up!" Xander answered as he sat down in the recliner.

"Xaaaander," William continued sing-songing in his mocking tone.

"What about Xander?" Anya asked in a drowsy voice as she sat up on the bunk bed.

"Nothing," Xander replied. "Spike here is just trying to get me into trouble."

"A real challenge, that," William mumbled.

"I'm hungry, what time is it?" Anya asked rubbing her eyes.

"Half past four," William replied looking at his watch.

"Are we finished?" Anya questioned, looking at Xander.

"Yeah," Xander nodded. "We are finished." He added gesturing madly at himself and William.

"Yay!" Anya exclaimed climbing off of the bed. "I don't know why people hate moving so much. I didn't even break a sweat." She noticed the aggravated look on Xander's face. "What?" she asked placing her hands on her hips.

Xander bowed his head in defeat and shook it slightly. "You are attractive and have many good qualities," he reminded himself.

William leaned over and whispered to his friend, "Are you trying to convince yourself of that mate?"

"Shut up!" Xander replied.

"Xaaander." William began teasing again in the same way that he had earlier.

Xander leaned over and lightly punched William’s arm. "Are you ready to go, baby?" he then asked turning to Anya.

"Oh yes," she replied. "We still have time for at least one orgasm before we have dinner." She then turned to Buffy giving her friend a goodbye hug and waved quickly to William.

Xander nodded to Buffy and William as he joined Anya's side scolding her for her overly blunt observation. "You remember that talk we had about private conversations? " He asked as they left the room, closing the door behind them. "How they are less private when they're in front of my friends."

"Sometimes I don't get those two." William commented, shaking his head. "They don't seem to have anything in common at all."

"Sure they do," Buffy replied looking over at the door and then back to William. "They both really like his penis."

William chuckled slightly at his girlfriend’s observation. "That they do, pet."

The couple shared a comfortable silence for a few moments as the realization set in: they were officially living together. This was their room, their bathroom, their closet, their...bed. This thought excited William and he immediately felt his jeans getting tighter as he moved closer to Buffy.

"Alone at last," he breathed as he reached out to take her into his arms. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips and began to place feather light kisses down her neckline to her collarbone. "Whatever shall we do now?" He asked his voice deep with desire.

"Well," Buffy replied leaning into his touch. "You should go take a quick shower and then get dressed because we are going out to dinner with Xander and Anya and Willow and Tara."

"Bloody Hell!" William exclaimed as his shoulders slumped and his head bowed in a pout. "Am I ever going to get you all to myself?" He asked, giving her his best puppy dog look.

"Of course." Buffy replied with a flirtatious smile.

"When luv? When is it going to just be you and me, and furthermore for how long?" He continued to pout crossing his arms in front of him.

Buffy pretended to ponder his question for moment and then wrapped her arms around Williams’s neck. "How about forever, does forever work for you?" she asked kissing him lightly on the nose.

William grabbed Buffy and pulled her closer to him. He cupped the back of her head with his hand and crushed his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss. When he finally released her he rested his forehead against hers and whispered his reply "Till the end of the world."

Buffy groaned as William released her and grabbed a towel from a box marked BATHROOM and began to head to the shower. Just as he was about to close the bathroom door behind him Buffy called out, "William."

"Yes luv?

"Why did Xander call you Spike?"

* * *

It was late when William and Buffy returned to their dorm room. He opened the door for her and allowed her to step inside before closing it behind him.

"Let me get this straight," she said turning around to face William. "Your fraternity brothers gave you the nickname ‘Spike’ because of a pledge class dare?"

"Yup," he answered.

"And you can't give me details because the brothers would so kick your ass."

"Yup."

"But what you can tell me is that it involves a fraternity house, some super glue and a few unmentionables purchased from Lolita's House of Pleasure?"

"Yup."

Buffy was shaking her head trying to stifle a laugh. "Is there anything else I should know?"

"I think that's about it," William told her, grinning.

"I'm not going to pretend to try to understand." Buffy shook her head and looked over at William and smiled lovingly at him. "I think I'm going to go take a shower," she told him. "Why don't you unpack the TV and pop in a DVD and we can watch it when I get out?"

"What ever you want pet," William replied

"Be right back," Buffy told him as she disappeared into the bathroom.

As soon as the door to the bathroom clicked shut William got to work. He pulled out all the Pillar candles he could find, placing them strategically around the room. He then lifted his boom box stereo out of the box that it was packed in and placed it on the dresser and plugged it in. He took a CD case from his jacket pocket and popped the CD into his stereo. Next, he turned off the main light and turned on the bedside lamp, covering the hood of the lamp with a red scarf, casting a romantic glow around the room. He heard the water to Buffy's shower turn off and quickly lit the candles around the room. He then hit the play button on his stereo and soft music began to play.

Buffy stepped out of the shower carefully and began to dry herself off. When she was satisfied she slipped into her blue silk pajamas and began to towel dry her golden hair. When her hair was no longer dripping, Buffy took her long-tooth comb and began to brush her locks. She gathered the long mass of hair into a ponytail and secured it with a rubber band. Buffy couldn't help but smile at her reflection. Just knowing that her William was in the other room waiting to hold her filled her with anticipation. There would be no tearful goodbye over the telephone tonight, as there had been every night for the past year. Buffy sighed and turned to open the door. When she stepped out into the main room her breath caught in her chest at the sight before her. The room was glowing with candlelight and a dim pink glow came from the bedside lamp reflecting the red satin scarf that was placed on top of it. Soft music was playing in the background. In the center of the room stood William. Buffy had never seen him look more beautiful than he did right now.

"I wanted to share something with you pet," he said taking a step toward her. "Give me your hand." William extended his hand to her and she eagerly took it. He then pulled her into his embrace and began to sway slightly to the music that was playing.

A hundred days had made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face

A thousand lights had made me colder and I don’t think I can look at this the same

But all the miles had separate

They disappeared now when I’m dreaming of your face

"Every night before I would go to bed," William whispered. "I would listen to this song and it would comfort me."

I’m here without you baby but you’re still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I’m here without you baby but you’re still with me in my dreams

And tonight it’s only you and me

The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello

I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go

I’m here without you baby but you’re still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I’m here without you baby but you’re still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl it’s only you and me

"Even when I was here and you were back in Sunnydale I could feel you, here." He told her bringing her hand to his chest directly over his heart. "You surround me Buffy. You're in my gut, my throat. I'm drowning in you Summers, I'm drowning in you."

Everything I know, and anywhere I go

It gets hard but it won’t take away my love

And when the last one falls, when it’s all said and done

It gets hard but it won’t take away my love

I’m here without you baby but you’re still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I’m here without you baby but you’re still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl it’s only you and me

I’m here without you baby but you’re still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I’m here without you baby but you’re still with me in my dreams

But tonight girl it’s only you and me

Buffy could feel the tears as they welled in her eyes. She looked up at her William and felt a burning that she had never felt for another person before. Sure, she had had other boyfriends, however, none ignited the fire within her the way William did.

"Tell me you want me," she whispered to him.

"I always want you." he breathed and then looked her up and down. When he finally met her gaze his blue eyes looked almost black with lust "Point of fact..."

"Shut up," she interrupted him with a searing kiss. Leading him over to their bed, she whispered into his mouth, "Too much talking." With that, she pushed him onto the mattress, not breaking their passionate embrace.

Chapter 3

A promise made

Buffy woke the next morning and couldn't help but smile. She was facing away from William, however she could feel his arms wrapped around her in a tight embrace. She carefully rolled over so that she could face him. His eyes were closed but would flutter slightly every now and then. He's dreaming, Buffy thought to herself as she reached up to outline his sharp cheekbones with her finger. William flinched a little when she made contact with his skin. Buffy laughed quietly as she continued her ministrations. She was tracing the cool lines of his lips when his eyes opened slightly.

"Good morning, sleepyhead." she whispered.

"Mmm," he moaned. "Dreamin'," he said as he closed his eyes.

"No baby, I'm here" she replied, reaching up and kissing his eyelids.

William took this opportunity to roll her on top of him. His eyes were now wide open and he was looking at her with a deep, passionate gaze.

"I thought you were sleeping." Buffy said in a scolding tone.

"I was," William defended himself." You woke me from a very pleasant dream," he replied with a smirk.

"Oh, I'm sorry honey, I'll let you- ahh," Her reply was cut short as William reached up and cupped her full breast in his hand.

"I thought that you could make it up to me." William looked up at her, his eyes dark with lust.

"I-I thought that you would have had your fill last night." Buffy groaned and leaned into his touch as he continued his attentions on her breast.

"I could never get enough of you." William pulled Buffy into a passionate, lingering kiss. When he finally released her so that she could breathe he lifted her blue silk tank top over her head and discarded it. He pulled her down again, taking her left breast into his mouth.

"I want you, Spike," Buffy whispered as she ran her hands through his hair. She then reached between their bodies to trace the outline of his throbbing erection through his boxers. "Now."

With that William rolled over so that he was on top of her. With one hand he traced the soft outlines of her face while he pushed his boxers down, freeing himself with the other. He gently kissed her on the lips and whispered softly, "I need to put on a condom, luv."

"No," she shook her head. "Just pull out when it's time."

William hesitated for only a moment, and then nodded when he saw the desire etched on her face. He had never made love to her unprotected before and the thought excited him beyond belief. He entered her slowly enjoying the feel of her surrounding him. Once he was completely inside, he paused for a moment allowing her to adjust, and to savor the feel of his skin against hers. When he couldn't stand it anymore he began to move in her slowly. Their lovemaking seemed to last for hours. Buffy met Spike thrust for thrust, clutching his shoulders and raining soft kisses down his neck. He felt the first wave of her orgasm hit when her inner walls clenched around him and he quickened his pace.

"I love you so much," She whispered as she climaxed again and again.

The feel of her trembling beneath him was too much for William to bear and he soon followed her over the edge, crying out her name. They lay in each other’s arms, still trembling from the aftershock of their lovemaking.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon when Buffy entered "The Taco Stand", a popular restaurant right across the street from campus.

"Buffy," the small redhead exclaimed, waving from her booth in the back of the restaurant. "Over here."

"Hey guys." Buffy slid into her seat across from Willow Rosenberg and her long time girlfriend Tara McClay. Willow and Tara had been dating seriously for the past year and six months. Like Buffy and Spike, their relationship had been mostly long-distance when Tara left for college last year.

"How was your move, Will?" Buffy asked with a grin on her face.

"Terrible," the redhead replied. "My mother is all on this ‘Menstrual life-force equals power’ thingy and made Tara and I move all of the big stuff ourselves. I'm not talking about just the boxes, I mean everything. Furniture and all." Willow finished gesturing madly with her hands.

"Sounds like fun," Buffy said dryly.

"It sucked!" Willow affirmed.

"So how are things with you and William?" Tara asked, smiling. "I bet he's on Cloud Nine, he was so miserable last year without you."

"Really good so far, and no, I'm not giving details." Buffy finished when she saw the devilish grin on Tara's face.

"Oh come on," Willow teased. "We don't need a diagram or anything, just maybe a blurry watercolor," she giggled, wagging her eyebrows.

"No way." Buffy quickly changed the subject. "I wonder if the loft guys are going to be done by the time William gets back to the room."

"You are going to love the loft Buffy," Tara said. “It frees up so much space in the room, you won't recognize it. Where is William anyway?"

"He had a meeting at the fraternity house," Buffy quickly answered. "I just hope that it looks as good as it did in the pictures they had in their brochures. The only downside is I kinda haven't told William how much it's going to cost," Buffy said with a guilty look.

"Uh-oh," Willow and Tara replied in unison.

"Yeah, that's gonna be two hundred dollars worth of unpleasant. I hope it's a funny aneurysm," Buffy half joked.

"Do you think he's going to flip out?" Willow asked, giving Buffy her worried face.

"My hope is that the room will look so good that he'll think it's worth every penny,” said Buffy, trying to reassure herself. "He was really unhappy with the size of the room when he first saw it so- " she trailed off thinking of what his reaction would be. She hoped that he wouldn't be too angry.

"I'm sure he won't be mad.” Willow smiled sheepishly at her friend. "For now I say we stuff ourselves with taco type goodness and girl talk.” Willow nodded her head to emphasize her words.

The three friends shared happy conversation as they ate their dinner. They talked of classes and probed Tara for everything she knew about their future professors. When they had had their fill they said their goodbyes, and Willow and Tara got into Willow's car and headed back to their apartment. Buffy walked back through the arches leading to North Campus and her dorm.

When Buffy opened the door to room 120 she could hardly believe her eyes. There was William standing in the middle of the room unpacking boxes and arranging knick-knacks. The curtain that served as the closet door was drawn aside and she could see that he had already unpacked and separated their clothes and hung them neatly in place. There were pictures accenting the walls and he had even hung her peach curtains. The loft had been successfully put up and Buffy noted that Tara had been right about not recognizing the room. If William were not there Buffy would have thought herself to be in the wrong place. The bunk beds had been taken down and one of them had been removed. There were wooden supports nailed into the wall supporting the bed that was now suspended off of the floor. The workmen had left them a ladder to use for climbing in and out of the make shift loft.

"You're decorating?” Buffy asked as she stepped into the room.

"Well yeah,” William answered looking up at her. "What can I say, I met a decorator once. Maybe something stuck."

"I hope this was a decorator of the male persuasion?” Buffy commented coyly.

"Oh yeah, I think he was hitting on me at the time.” William smirked, "I told him right quick that my heart belonged to the prettiest bird in Sunnydale, California. Although, I did tell him not to worry and I'd give him my number anyway, because after you, I'd be sworn off from women forever."

"Oh my God!" Buffy exclaimed giggling. "You gave a gay man your number."

"Nah I gave him Xander's; thought it'd be funny."

Buffy started to laugh hysterically. She walked over to him, wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his chest. He held onto her shoulders and took in her scent, marveling at her beauty. When she had calmed down she looked up into his eyes.

"William, I need to talk to you for a second.” Buffy took William by the hand and sat him down in his recliner. She then took a seat in his lap and began to run her fingers through his hair. "There's something that I need to tell you, and I've been kinda avoid-y when it comes to the subject-"

"You're about to tell me about the two hundred dollars aren't you?” William looked up at her face and laughed at her look of surprise. "The workmen were here when I got home, said they quoted you two hundred over the phone the other day."

"I was totally going to tell you. I just didn't want to overload you. You know, after the move and all.” Buffy explained.

"Luv, it's not something that would have bothered me. You know that I'm not one that worries about money and such."

Buffy nodded in agreement.

"I don't, however, want you to keep secrets from me. We're in this together Buffy. We’re not just roommates, we’re lovers and that means we don't keep things from each other. Okay?"

"Okay," Buffy agreed hugging him tightly. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Oh, I'm going to let you make it up to me pet," William replied wrapping his arms around her.

"Yay." Buffy smiled and leaned in to kiss him. William pulled away only slightly, but enough for Buffy to get the hint. She saw the look in his eyes and knew that he did not mean what she thought. "What?"

"I wasn't talking about sex you little vixen, not that I'm refusing." He smiled wagging his eyebrows. "What I want you to do is really simple."

"What is it?" she asked getting impatient.

"I want you to come clean with your mum about us living together,” William answered, giving her his most serious resolve face. "Will you do that?"

"Yes," Buffy replied. "I'll tell her tomorrow."

]

Chapter 4

A promise broken

2 months later

"Honey I'm home.” William grandly exclaimed as he entered their room. He saw Buffy sitting at her desk, crouched over a book while scribbling madly on the notebook paper she had spread out in front of her.

"How did the midterm go?” She asked, not looking up.

"Surprisingly well," he smirked. "It's amazing what studying mixed with a little bullshitting can do.” He walked over to her and peeked curiously over her shoulder. "Calculus?" he inquired.

"Yeah," she answered. "My test is today and I still don't know half of this crap. At least I know they'll give me credit for spelling my name correctly. They will give me credit for that right?” Buffy asked finally taking a moment to look up at William.

"Not sure, I think it depends on the teacher,” he said. Noticing the troubled look on her face, he quickly amended, "But I'm sure that you don't have anything to worry about. You're going to do fine."

"Wah!” Buffy replied slamming down her pencil on the desk. "This doesn't make any sense."

"I'm sure it does," William tried to reassure her. "Here let me see.” With that he took the paper she had been scribbling on and studied it carefully. When he was done he looked at her with a raised eyebrow and said, "You're right this doesn't make any sense."

"See," she exclaimed snatching the paper back from him. "It's senseless.” Buffy began to rub her temple with the palm of her hand in frustration.

"But, at least you know that, so you're learning.” William tried to comfort her. He decided to take matters into his own hands and began to lightly massage her shoulders.

"Mmm," she moaned. "That feels good."

William leaned down so he could softly whisper in her ear, "When's your test, love?"

Buffy glanced at her alarm clock and sighed. "Twenty minutes and counting. In fact, I should probably get going because I'm meeting Willow on North Campus. We're going to walk to class together and go get coffee after."

"Well, just make sure that you're home no later than 8:30. Remember we're going out tonight.” William stopped massaging her shoulders and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. "I think you're in need of some non-school related fun, wouldn't you agree?"

"I know. I didn't forget.” Buffy rose from her desk and gathered her things for class. "I'm off to fail miserably."

"It's good to have a goal love,” William replied sarcastically.

Buffy playfully swatted him on the arm and leaned in for a quick kiss. "I'll be home by 7:30 at the latest.” She turned to leave and heard him call out to her.

"Good luck baby, I love you."

She turned and smiled. "I love you too.” With that Buffy stepped out of her room and made her way to North Campus.

* * *

"So how did you do?” Willow asked as soon as Buffy stepped out of the auditorium. Willow had been the first student in the class to finish her exam and had been impatiently waiting for her friend to emerge.

"Words cannot describe how much that sucked,” Buffy groaned. "I am in major need of some caffeinated refreshment.”

"Well luckily they sell coffee in the coffee shop,” Willow smiled as she and her friend exited the building together. They walked quickly to the Starbucks across the street from campus and made their orders. They decided on an outside table and sat to enjoy conversation and their tall non-fat lattes.

"So how are things with you and William?” Willow asked in a suggestive tone. "Still snuggly?"

"You could say that.” Buffy tried to hide the grin that was forming on her face. "Things have been really hectic since midterms started. We haven't been able to see much of each other, but when we do it's...nice."

"Yeah I'll bet,” Willow replied again with her suggestive tone. "Well, luckily midterms are over, and you'll have him all to yourself again, not to mention all the brainless fun we're going to have tonight."

"Yeah.” Buffy replied.

Willow cast her friend a questioning look. She and Buffy had been best friends ever since Willow could remember; she could tell when her friend was holding something back. This was undoubtedly one of those times.

"Buffy” Willow started, " You have ‘But Face’.” Willow told her.

"What?” Buffy exclaimed.

"You know, ‘But Face’. Like you're about to throw a big ‘But’ in the middle of your happiness,” Willow explained.

Buffy's only response was the confused, almost frightened look on her face.

"B-U-T.” Willow further explained. "Not B-U-T-T, ya perv,” Willow smiled.

Buffy couldn't help but laugh and shake her head. When the laughter subsided her face turned serious again. "Well maybe a little ‘but’."

"So then we're definitely not talking about yours,” Willow joked.

"Bitch!” Buffy exclaimed, throwing her napkin at her friend pretending to be offended.

"I'm sorry,” Willow laughed. "That was too easy."

"Like I was saying,” Buffy continued. "There are a couple of things that I'm trying to work through."

"Like what?” Willow probed.

"Well do you want me to start with the minor or the major?” Buffy asked.

"There's a major‑ oh man this is serious.” Willow gasped, the conversation taking a definite turn for the somber.

"Yeah,” Buffy replied.

"Major like what?” Willow continued to probe.

"Major like I still haven't told my mom that we're living together,” Buffy answered with a guilty look.

"That's major?” Willow asked obviously confused.

"Well yeah, in the sense that I promised William that I would tell her like two months ago. He's going to be pissed if he finds out."

"So when are you going to tell her?” Willow asked, taking a sip of her now lukewarm latte.

"I was thinking that if I could make it until Christmas break I would tell her then.” Buffy paused slightly to taste her own drink, and then continued. "I've just been so stressed with the move, and the adjusting and the midterms that the added stress of a pissed off mom is so not something I want to deal with."

"That's understandable,” Willow nodded in agreement. "So what else? There was a "minor" if I recall correctly."

"Oh yeah, well you have to promise you won't say anything to anyone. Not even to Tara.” Buffy looked at Willow who was just nodding her head. "Do you promise?"

"Of course,” Willow agreed.

"I'msortoflate” Buffy rambled taking another sip of her coffee.

"What? Okay back up a sec, I thought I just heard you say that you were late?” Her friend exclaimed.

"Yeah, you heard right.”

"Okay, that's what you call minor? I think we need to seriously re-think your problem labeling.” Willow's eyes were now wide with wonder as she stared at her friend. "Does William know?"

"Not yet. And it's not really that big of a deal. I'm just late right now, and it's not like that's never happened before. It could be anything; like I said I've been really stressed.” Buffy took a deep breath and then continued. "The way I see it is there's nothing to worry about until there's something to worry about. If I'm not, great. If I am, then we'll deal. William's not going to run from something like this.”

"Totally, I definitely do not see William as the impregnate and vacate type; he is so in love with you. Buffy, this is a big deal. Are you going to take a test?” Willow was starting to get frantic. She hadn't expected this kind of news.

"Well I thought that I would actually do that this weekend. Since midterms are officially over, that takes a load off. Will, I know what a big deal this is, I just don't see the point in getting all freaked out until I know for sure.” Buffy gave Willow a reassuring smile and went back to her latte.

"I'll be worried enough for the both of us, how's that?” Willow asked trying to smile at her friend.

"Deal,” Buffy agreed. "Now let's get out of here. We're going to be late and I promised William I'd be home by 7:30."

* * *

William was standing in front of his closet, fresh from a shower with a towel around his waist, searching for the proper attire for his evening activities. It wasn't often that he got to go out with all of his friends from Sunnydale, and the fact that he would get a little undistracted quality time with Buffy made him want to look extra special. He decided on her favorite: black jeans, black t-shirt, and a red button down dress shirt. He smiled at his appearance in the full-length mirror and thought, This bird's totally domesticated you mate. William noticed a small flashing light behind him reflecting in the mirror: the answering machine. Realizing that someone must have called while he was in the shower, and he had been too busy ogling at clothes to notice, he walked over to the table that held the machine and pressed the play button.

"You have one new message,” the mechanical voice rang out.

"Buffy, hi it's Mom. I've been trying to call you to see what your plans for Thanksgiving were, but you never seem to be home anymore. I guess college is keeping my baby busy. Just call me whenever you get the chance. I love you sweetie...Oh by the way, I need you to give me William's new number if he has one. When I couldn't get in touch with you I thought that I would try you at his place and kept getting the message that the phone had been disconnected. Did he decide to move closer to campus after all? Let me know hon., take care."

William felt a lump rise in his throat. Not only had Buffy broken her promise to him, she'd been lying to him for the past two months. He was barely able to control the anger that was rising inside of him. So much so, that he began to tremble.

* * *

Buffy smiled contentedly as she looked around the small table at each of her friends. They had decided to go out to dinner and then to the Georgia Theatre for Retro Night. Willow had a strange weakness for oldies, and the rest of the group had a strange weakness for watching Willow do her infamous Village People impression. All in all, the evening promised to be chock full of brainless fun for everyone. Everyone that is, except for William . Buffy noticed right away when she returned to their room that he was in a foul mood. She tried to question him on it but he just shrugged her off and said that he was exhausted from his exams. Buffy could relate to the exhaustion, but she had a feeling it was something more. He had barely touched her all night. She had her hand resting on his thigh at the moment and would give him a gentle squeeze every now and then to let him know that she was there. He wouldn't even look at her. Instead he focused his attention on Xander and their conversation about the current fraternity house renovation.

When Tara got up to go to the restroom, Willow leaned across the table towards Buffy and whispered, “Is it just me or is it a little cold in here?”

"You noticed too?” Buffy asked with disappointment in her voice. She had hoped that she was just being silly in thinking that William was not acting like his normal self.

"A little." Willow admitted. "Did you have ‘the talk’ yet, or rather ‘the talks’?” she asked, .looking worried.

"Not yet. I was thinking I would sit him down tonight, but now I'm thinking that's not such a good idea.” Buffy grimaced. "I just wish he would tell me what's got him so pissy."

"Are we discussing William's mood?” Anya interjected, growing bored with the boys’ conversation. All Buffy could do was nod in response.

"What's wrong with him?” Anya whispered

"That's the question before the court,” Willow answered.

"Maybe Xander could talk to him.” Tara added having returned to Willow's side catching the tail end of the conversation.

"Um, Xander is going to be preoccupied tonight, with orgasms,” Anya protested.

"That's okay Ahn, I think I'll handle this one.” Buffy reassured her. The evening progressed with light conversation amongst the group. The tension between Buffy and William was mounting, and Buffy could feel it. She had tried to take his hand after he was done eating but he had just gotten up quickly from the table, stating that he had to ‘hit the head.’ Buffy couldn't help but wonder what she had done to upset him so. He was perfectly fine before she went to class. It was when they were getting ready to leave that Buffy decided that she had had enough. The waiter brought the check around and Anya was busy trying to decide who owed what.

William handed Xander his credit card and said, "Here mate, you know what we had. I need some fresh air, just give it to me in the car."

"Sure thing, man.” Xander smiled at his friend and took the card.

William nodded in thanks and stood from the table grabbing his coat. He then proceeded to walk out of the restaurant. Buffy wasn't far behind him. He hadn't asked her to join him, but she needed to know what was going on and she needed to know now.

When she reached the door she could see him standing in the middle of the parking lot. there was a cloud billowing above his head, which told Buffy that he was smoking a cigarette, a habit she thought he had quit months ago. That is it, Buffy thought, striding towards him.

"William,” she called out. Buffy waited a minute and when he didn't respond she tried again, this time with more volume. "William.” Still no response. "Spike!” Buffy almost screamed his nickname.

William turned around to face her, glad that she was far enough away from him to hide the tears that were now staining his face. He didn't speak; he only watched as she began to walk over to where he was. He could hear claps of thunder in the distance and the faint smell of Georgia rain tickled his nose. Weather to fit the mood I guess, he thought to himself.

"What the hell are you doing?” she exclaimed as she reached him.

"What the bleeding hell does it look like I'm doing Summers? I'm having a smoke.” William replied coldly as he turned away from her.

"You told me you quit smoking,” Buffy accused.

"Yeah I guess I did.” William replied.

"What the hell is wrong with you tonight? You've been all bad moody ever since I got home,” Buffy continued.

"I told you, I'm tired,” William growled. He did not want to have this conversation here.

"Too tired to look at me?” Buffy asked with equal animosity in her voice. Her patience was seriously starting to weaken. William turned around to look at her when she said that and Buffy saw the hurt in his eyes and on his face. She could tell that he had been crying and began to soften her tone. "Please tell me what's going on?” she pleaded.

"I can't, not now.” He replied stamping out the finished cigarette. He began to walk past her towards the car but Buffy grabbed his arm to stop him.

"You have to talk to me, please don't shut me out,” she begged her own tears threatening to fall.

"You mean like you've shut me out these past two months?” William replied in an accusatory tone.

"What are you talking about?” Buffy asked.

"You know bloody well what I'm talking about.” William stared a hole right through Buffy. He was glad when it finally began to rain because he could feel fresh tears forming behind his eyes and did not want her to see him break down.

"I really don't,” Buffy replied.

"You lied to me,” William finally admitted. "For the past two months you've done nothing but lie to me. I know for a fact that you haven't told your mum that we're living together. You promised me, or was that just another lie?” William asked his tears falling freely now, cloaked by the quickening rainfall.

"William, I ‑” Buffy trailed off not knowing what to say to him.

"You what? Are you ashamed of me, Buffy? Because I honestly can't think of another reason why you wouldn't want to tell you mother that you're living with me."

"Of course not,” Buffy replied, her own tears beginning to fall. "I just wanted to get through midterms without her freaking out on me."

"Then why didn't you tell me that? Why did you promise me you would tell her then lie about it?” William's voice was beginning to break with the strain of his emotion.

"William, I'm sorry. It's not that big of a deal, I'll tell her tomorrow. We can tell her together,” Buffy pleaded trying to placate him.

William smirked at her efforts. "If it's not that big of a deal, then why are you sorry?” With that, he shook his head and walked over to his car. Xander, Anya, Willow and Tara were all gathered outside now watching the scene unfold. They watched a now soaked William walk over to his black DeSoto and stand beside the passenger door. Xander was the first to reach his friend and nodded in agreement when William suggested they forego Retro Night and just head back to the dorm. Buffy walked slowly over to where her friends were.

Oh my god what have I done? Buffy thought to herself as she neared the car. She reached into her purse and took out the keys to William's car and slowly handed them to him.

"I don't think I need to drive right now,” he told her coldly.

Buffy flinched slightly at his response. All she could do was nod for fear of bursting into tears. She climbed into the drivers seat, and William sat next to her. Anya sat in Xander's lap with Willow and Tara in the spacious back seat. Buffy slowly started the engine and began to drive toward the dorm. She was trying to take it slow because the now pounding rain was making it increasingly hard to see. She looked over at William who was keeping his eyes straight ahead watching the windshield wipers dance in front of him.

"William, I swear I didn't mean to hurt you, I just ‑"

"Buffy watch the road." William cut her off turning slightly towards her.

She nodded, keeping her eyes on his pained expression. She only looked away from the road for a moment, a second really. The next thing she heard was Willow screaming from the backseat.

"Oh my God Buffy watch out!"

Buffy turned in time to see the two lights of what looked like a pick up truck headed straight towards them. The lights kept getting brighter as Buffy tried to rationalize what she needed to do.

Turn Buffy, turn now. Buffy gripped the wheel and frantically began to turn, trying to miss the oncoming vehicle. The next thing Buffy heard was a loud crash as the truck came in contact with the passenger side of the DeSoto. Then the world was spinning over and over again. The last thing Buffy remembered was calling out the name “William” before the world went black.

Next