15:

Riley dropped Buffy off and kissed her gently on the lips. She didn’t feel anything except maybe a little nautious.

She thanked him and told him she’d see him on Monday at school.

“Buffy?”

She sighed. “Ya Riley?”

“Are we really going out?”

“Sure.” She got out of the car and waved. That stupid farmboy had no idea that she wasn’t really interested. She felt bad using him to try and forget Spike but she also assumed he would be too stupid to notice or care if he found out.


She stepped into the dark house and tip-toed downstairs. Spike was sleeping. She sat softly on the edge of his bed and watched his even breathing. How could she have done that to him? She felt like a bitch, fuck, she was a bitch when it came right down to it. She ran her hand feather light over his curls. His hair was so soft. With a sigh she walked upstairs to go to bed. She didn’t see Spike open his eyes and she didn’t see the tears in them. “Night Buffy”he whispered to the empty room.






Monday morning, the first day of school………….


Buffy was walking with her face down, looking to see what class she had for homeroom. She smashed right into a rock solid body and fell, her books went flying everywhere.

She looked up and saw the man who hadn’t spoken one word to her since Friday.

“Maybe you should watch where you’re going.”he said in a harsh tone, fighting the urge to help her up. But he couldn’t, he had an image to start. He decided to be the big bad again, no matter how hard it would be.

“Sorry.”

Spike hadn’t expected that and he knew that she wasn’t talking about running into him. He just walked away. Buffy watched him with a heavy heart.

She walked into her class just as the bell rang, barely making it. How could she live with someone who she wanted so much and couldn’t have? It was going to be a long year.



“Hey Wills, can you believe they gave out homework on the first day?”a weary Buffy asked her friend at the end of the day whose locker was right next to hers.

“I know, isn’t it great?”the excited redhead gushed. Buffy laughed.

“Too nerdy?”

“Just nerdy enough to make you Willow, who I love.”

Willow smiled up at her friend. Buffy had told her about her ‘being with Riley’ and she didn’t like it but she would support her friend no matter what. Her and Xander both agreed it was for the best that they not interfere, that this would play out better on it’s own. She smiled to herself.

“Thinking about Xan?”Buffy asked chuckling.

Willow blushed. “How’d you’d know?”

“That goofy smile was the first hint. Then the not answering me when I asked you a question was the second.”

“Oh sorry, what was the question?”

“Do you want a lift home?”

Willow paled at the thought. “Um no thanks I’m gonna go to Xan’s with him.”

“Oh, phone me later?”

“You bet.”




Buffy slumped on her couch. She had managed not to bump into Spike for the rest of the day. She knew he would be home any minute and decided to start trying to make things better between them.


Spike walked in the door and went right to his room, not even sparing Buffy a glance. He stopped by his bureau when he saw a steaming cup of hot chocolate with tiny marshmallows in it, just like Joyce had made for him. He smiled in spite of himself, she was trying, he’d give her that. He just felt so betrayed by what she’d done. It wasn’t going to be that easy.


He spent the next 2 hours working on his homework. He got hungry and went into the kitchen to have a bite to eat. Riley was there with Buffy sitting at the table. The two males glared at each other with dislike.

“Well well. If it isn’t captain cardboard. How’s the city life treating you, miss the farm? Miss the sheep?”

Buffy knew that Spike was insinuating that Riley fucked them but the dumb ass had no idea.

“Actually we didn’t have sheep.”

Spike snorted, he really was from a farm and he REALLY was stupid. He went to the fridge and grabbed some fruit before heading back downstairs.

Buffy sat there looking at Riley in shock. What a fucken moron. ‘How the fuck can I stay with him?’she asked herself and answered ‘I cant.’

“Riley I have a headache so im gonna turn in early, okay?”she said hoping he believed her.

Of course he did. “Allright Buffy, I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yep”she fake smiled as he pecked her on the lips.

She let out a sigh as he left and went downstairs. “We need to talk..”

Spike looked up. “Where’s Mr. Amazing?”he asked sarcastically.

“I sent him home and he has nothing to do with this.”

Spike went silent, he may as well hear her out.

“I’m beyond sorry for what I did to you. It was sick and it was wrong. But I cant turn back time no matter how much I wish I could.”she ran her hand through her hair in frustration. “Honestly Spike I jut didn’t know what to do. I’m 16 going on 17 in a couple of weeks. I can still be young and stupid sometimes. But I lost my mom, I lost my virginity to a sick fuck and now I’ve lost one of my best friends. I just don’t know what to do anymore.”she said and broke into sobs.

Bloody hell. He couldn’t stand to see a bird cry under normal circumstances, let alone someone he cared about. Especially not her. He was by her side in a second and he was holding her tight.

“I just want us to be okay and I want my mommy back.”she wailed.

Spike rubbed her back gently. His heart broke for her. Sod it, he thought, the big bad can go fuck himself and loves bitch can come back, at least for tonight.

He layed down on his bed and pulled her with him, drawing the blankets over them.

“I’m sorry pet, just let it out”he soothed.

Buffy eventually stopped crying and snuggled in closer to him, he could see the hope shining in her eyes. They fell asleep like that, holding each other close and relishing the warmth they gave each other, both knowing it would be different in the harsh light of day again. She had Riley and he was pissed at her. But for tonight, she was just Buffy and he was just Spike and they needed each other. For tonight.


 

16:

Buffy woke up and stretched and her stomach brushed against something hard….very hard. Her eyes bulged and she remembered where she was.

“Sorry about that Buffy.”

She could only nod her head at him. She noticed that he was still using her name instead of one of the nicknames she loved so much.

“Spike, about last night…”

“Nothing to say, last night is over and it’s a new day. We better get ready for school.”

“But there is a lot to say. I mean….”

“Not right now Buffy, I need to get ready.”

“Later then?”

“Maybe.”

Buffy decided that maybe was good enough and walked upstairs to dress for school.


Spike went to his drawers and pulled out some clothes. He felt bad about being so curt with Buffy and decided that he would definitely talk to her later tonight, after he took care of something.



Buffy walked in the door and went straight to her couch to sleep. It had been a rough day and she just wanted sleep. She opened her eyes at 8:30, looked for Spike and sighed. ‘I guess he didn’t want to talk yet.’ She got her coat and decided to go see her mom.



“Hello Joyce, I hope you like your flowers. I didn’t know what else to get so I hope these’ll do.” Spike was kneeling in front of her grave. “I miss you and I wish we’d have had the chance to get to know each other better. You make a great cup of hot chocolate.” He said with a smile. He didn’t notice Buffy watching him.

“Me and Buffy had a falling out but I’m sure we’ll work things out. She makes her mistakes Joyce, but who doesn’t? You did a great job. Say Hi to my da’ for me, I’ll talk to you soon.”

He stood and turned, seeing Buffy for the first time. She walked up to him and gave him a hard hug.

“Thank you for that.”she pointed to the arrangement of lilies.

He didn’t say anything.

“They where her favorite.” Buffy added.

Spike waited for her as she spoke to her mom. They walked away side by side when she was done, each waiting for the other to break the silence.

Buffy went first.

“Do you think they’re friends?”

“Who?”he asked.

“Our parents.”

“Oh” Spike realised she was referring to Joyce and Rupert. “I don’t see why not pet, they’re probably watching over us.”

Buffy smiled at that thought and reached for his hand without realising it. He took it naturally, not realising either.

“So how are you and Captain Cardboard?”he asked and dropped her hand when he noticed he was holding it.

Buffy sighed . “I don’t know, I’d say he’s fine but mentally….not so sure.”

This earned a laugh from Spike. “So why are you with him?”

“To try to hide the fact that someone rejected me and I was hurt so I wanted to make him jealous.”

“I see.” Spike lit up a smoke. “And hows that working for you?”

“Not so good.”she admitted. “I think I hurt him more than he could ever forgive me for.”

“Maybe you did.”

Buffy held back tears. She knew he understood the conversation was about him and he had just told her there was still no chance.

“But maybe you didn’t.” he reached for her hand again.

Or was there?
 

17:

“Hey Buffy.” Riley called as she headed to the caf with Willow and Xan, would they ever stop being so adorable? “Hey guys.” He added and nodded to her friends.

They both said hello but Xan rolled his eyes when he did which earned him an elbow to his side from the little redhead.

“Ouch, well be inside k buff?”

“Sure, I’ll be in soon.”

She watched her friends walk inside and followed Riley into the lunch line.

“So we on for tonight Buffy?”

“Actually Riley we need to talk.”

“Oh? About what?”

“Well I cant see you anymore, I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

Riley looked at her and laughed loudly. They officially had everyones attention now.

“Hurt me? Please.”he snorted. Buffy shrugged and turned to walk away but he grabbed her arm.

“Not so fast miss high and mighty, I have more to say.”

She stopped and turned around, annoyed. “Get on with it please.”

“The only reason I dated you was because a friend of mine told me you dated his friend Angel and that you put out easy. Why else would I want to be with you?”he sneered.

Buffy’s heart snapped but at the same time so did her calm.

“Look Riley.”she yelled. “Just because I’m not as easy as the farm animals you seem to love so much doesn’t give you the right to say things like that.”

The whole caf yelled in laughter and Riley turned beat red.

“You’re just a snobby whore….”

His sentence was cut short when Spike walked up behind Buffy.

“If you want to pick on someone…”Spike was cut short as well when Buffy’s fist smashed Riley in the face. He went down hard. After a few seconds everyone realised she had knocked him out and they cheered her for it.

“Quess you didn’t need my help?”Spike teased.

“Nope.”she beamed, “but it is appreciated.”

Spike looked at the tiny blond, she’d changed so much so quickly. Once too afraid to leave a man who raped and abused her, she’d turned into someone who wouldn’t even let a guy run his mouth at her. He was proud.

“Mind if I join you for lunch?”

“Of course not.”she smiled and he put his hand on the small of her back and led her to their friends table.


“Way to go Buff.”Xan cheered and Willow smiled, giving her a thumbs up.

“That farm animal comment was priceless.”Willow gushed.

Spike snorted. He had heard that too.

“So since we all seem to be friends again would you too wanna double to the bronze with me and Willow this Friday?” Xan asked.

“Um actually Spike doesn’t like me like tha—“

“We would love too.”Spike cut her off and gave her hand a squeeze before looking at her and mouthing, “friends can do things together”.

Buffy felt her heart soar, she was his friend again, and she’d never felt so good.

 

18:

The week passed by pretty quickly and before they knew it Buffy and Spike were getting ready to go to the bronze. He hadn’t slept in her room in case of nightmares or anything just yet but they were on the mend.

“Bloody hell Buffy, you look amazing!” Spike uttered as she walked down the stairs. She was sporting a knee length red dress with black ‘hooker boots’. Her hair was down in loose waves and she was wearing lip gloss (cherry flavoured) and black eyeliner.

“Thanx”she smiled “So do you!”

He was wearing a black button down top over a white wifebeater and a pair of black cargos. That ‘slacker look’ made her drool.

“Shall we then?”he offered her his arm and she took it instantly, “were gonna walk today Buffy.”he added remembering the incident with the almost squished cat.

“Sure”she laughed “It’s a nice night out anyway.”

As they walked they talked about everything, from the weather, to clothes, to school, everything except them. They where both ignoring that for now, but it had to be dealt with soon.

They walked into the bronze and saw that Xan and Willow where already on the dance floor. Buffy gave them a quick wave when they spotted her and Spike smiled before going to get some drinks.

“Back already?” she asked a few minutes later when he placed the drinks on the table and Xan and Willow came to join them.

“Wanted me gone for longer pet?”Spike joked.

“Maybe I did.”she said with a sly wink to let him know she was teasing.

“So Will, Xan, how are you guys?”Spike asked.

“In love.” Xan replied as Willow nodded her agreement and Xans arms wrapped around her from behind.

“Awwwww, so sweet!” Buffy gushed.

“How are you too?”Xan asked.

“Um, I don’t really know.”Buffy admitted.

“It’s kinda weird Xan”Spike explained.

“You know..”Willow said with a shy smile “nothing clears the air like a nice dance together.”

Just then a song they all loved came on and they all stood up.

“Wanna dance luv?”Spike breathed into her ear.

She could only manage to nod her head. His voice was so sexy…..


They walked onto the dance floor as the lyrics started to play.

*Beauty queen of only 18, she had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her, she always belonged to someone else
I drove for miles and miles and wound up at your door
I’ve had you so many times but somehow I want more

I don’t mind spending everyday, out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile, ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved, she will be loved*

Buffy and Spike inched closer as his hands went to the small of her back. She sighed into him. It felt so right to be next to him.


*Tap on my window, knock on my door,
I want to make you feel beautiful,
I know I tend to get so insecure,
Doesn’t matter anymore*

Spike sang along with that verse and Buffy didn’t know if he was trying to tell her something or if he was just singing.

Spike had to bite back a smile as he saw the confused look on Buffy’s face. This song was exactly how he felt about her.


*It’s not always rainbows and butterflies it’s compromise,
It moves us along yeah
My hearts always full and my doors always open
You come any time you want

I don’t mind spending everyday, out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved, she will be loved, she will be loved, she will be loved…..*


Buffy took a chance and started to run his hand over the small curls at the nape of his neck and relaxed when he sighed and nuzzled her cheek. She held back a smile. Maybe things where gonna be okay….



*I know why you hide alone in your car, know all of the things
That make you who you are
I know that Goodbye means nothing at all
Because that word makes me catch her every time she falls
Yeah

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I don’t mind spending every day
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay a while
And she will be loved……………..*

Spike had sung the entire verse to her and Buffys heart was beating ultra fast. She looked at him with tears in her eyes, she wasn’t sure where they stood and it bugged her.

Spike saw the sad smile and cupped her face in his hand, looking her in the eyes. “Look for the girl with the broken smile……ask her if she’d like to stay awhile?” It was more a question then a sentence from the song.

Buffy looked at him in open shock. He was asking her if she’d be with him.

“Will she be loved?”she asked carefully in case she had misunderstood what he was saying.

“She already is.”Spike answered and pressed his lips to hers in a kiss.

 

19:

He pulled away from her breathless. “Wow. That was…”

“A mistake.”she teased.

“Amazing.”he corrected.

He pulled her in to another hug. “I do love you pet.”he whispered softly into her ear.

“I love you.”she said just as softly “Do you um…..”she turned pink with embarrassment. “Wanna get out of here?”

Spike growled in response and grabbed her hand, pulling her towards the exit.

“Did you just growl?”she asked giggling.

“What can I say luv, you bring out the animal in me.”


They half walked half ran to Buffy’s house. When they got in and locked up behind them Buffy looked at Spike.

“My room or yours?”

“Yours…..bad memories of us in there.”he muttered. She nodded her head and gently lead him up the stairs to her room. She opened the door and ushered him inside. She took his hand and brought him to a sitting position on the bed with her.

“Nervous?”

“Ya pet I am…”he fidgeted with a string on his top. “Silly huh?”

“No, I am too.”she admitted. “I haven’t made love to anyone except for Angel…”Spike cut her off.

“Wrong Buffy, you never made love, that’s not what it’s like. It can be such a wonderful thing.”

“Show me then.”she breathed. She stood up and peeled off her dress slowly, letting him eat up every one of her details. Once the dress hit the floor she went and stood in front of him. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. His face was level with her belly button. His tongue darted out a licked a small circle on her skin. She shivered at the touch and moaned at the loss when he momentarily pulled away to look at her.

“You’re so beautiful Buffy, I’ve never known anyone like you.” He resumed licking the skin of her stomach lightly and slid off the bed so that he could lick a much more desirable area.

Buffy gasped and her fingers tightened their hold on his head as he snaked his tongue into her. He moaned as he felt the muscles of her legs twitch where he stroked them. He let his tongue in just a little bit more and he could hear her breathing getting harder. The way she reacted to him so fast got him hard. He smiled into her heat as he entered his tongue completely into her moist depths. She went rigid against him for a second before she started slowly thrusting herself onto his outstretched tongue. He replaced his tongue with two fingers and began to suck on her clit. She was practically screaming now, he could feel her tighten and knew she was about to come. He applied more pressure with his mouth and gave harder thrusts with his digits until she screamed his name in pleasure.

“Spike”she breathed and sunk to her knees and kissed him deeply.

He scooped her up and layed her gently onto the bed. Her small hand went to his zipper and pulled it down, releasing his erection.

She started to pump him slowly and he moved with her. He had his eyes tightly closed and was muttering soft words. She loved the way he was moving and moaning, she could feel herself getting more wet with each pant he gave.

“Buffy, I’m gonna come soon, stop.”he begged but she paid no attention. Instead she lowered his body and took his erection into her mouth. She watched his face as she moved her mouth up and down along his length.

His whole body shook as he came into her mouth and she swallowed every drop greedily.

She crawled back up to him and layed against his side. He rolled over to face her.

“You were incredible kitten.”

“So where you baby.”

He looked shocked.

“Oh do I have a nickname now?”

“Yup, since I have at least three I thought I’d give you one.”

He smiled and kissed her, hard again. Buffy could feel his dick on her stomach and her eyes widened.

“Again?”

“Again.”he answered and pulled his pants off all the way and stripped off his shirts.

He rolled on top of her and pushed the stray hair out of her face. “Are you ready for this love?”

“Ready and willing” They both knew that the willing part of her reply was more than it appeared. She was letting him know that he was in no way like Angel, that she was comfortable with him.

He placed his head at her entrance and lowered himself in, making sure to be slow and soft, everything her last ‘boyfriend’ hadn’t been.

She gasped when he filled her so completely. Spike had to stop moving altogether, she was so hot and tight, he was having trouble not cumming right away.

After they ‘settled in’ Spike began to sway into her in slow, deep thrusts. Soon she was meeting his hips halfway and digging her nails into his back. She wrapped her legs around him and whimpered in pleasure. With every stroke now he was hitting her clit. She urged him to go faster and he quickly obeyed. He added a finger to her clit for more pleasure and was rewarded as she screamed his name and came around him. He couldn’t hold back and came right after her, collapsing on her when he was done.

“Buffy luv’ ,so good, I love you so much.”he breathed.

“I love you Spike.”she whispered as she played with his hair.

They shifted so that she was lying in his arms and they fell asleep like that, both happy for the first time in a long time…..

 

20:
Spike woke up with a start. He was alone. Why? Had Buffy left him when he’d fallen asleep, did she think they’d made a mistake?

He started to panic when her door opened quietly and she walked in. When she saw his face she smiled gently.

“You okay?”

“Where were you?”he asked, his voice sounded childlike and endearing to Buffy.

“I had to brush my teeth”she answered and slipped back into the bed next to him. “Sorry if I scared you…”

“S’alright pet, just me over reacting” he said with a small laugh.

Buffy nuzzled her face against his chest. “I would never leave you baby.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.” She said as her hand snuck down to his pants.

Spike smirked. “I knew you wanted my tight body.”

Buffy laughed. “Well ya, who wouldn’t? Your so hot and muscly…”

“Muscly?” He lifted his eyebrow. “Is that a word?”

“Ya huh.”she smiled prettily.

“Good to know pet.”he said before flipping them over so that he was on top. God he could get used to this.



Buffy and Spike walked hand in hand down the Sunnydale corridor and stopped to check out why there was a bunch of kids around Rileys locker. Buffys hand flew to her mouth to suppress her laughter but Spike openly snorted. Someone had taped a stuffed sheep to Rileys locker and had written in large letters “For those lonely nights….”


Riley pushed through the crowd and turned when he saw what was done.

“You…..”he hissed at Buffy and took a step towards her.

Spike stepped in front of her. “You don’t have the privilege of talking to her anymore mate, understood?”

Riley, although he was larger, wasn’t half as intimidating as Spike, and just turned to his locker and tore the stuffed animal off and walked away fuming. Buffy turned and saw Jonathon and Warren give each other high fives and winked at them when they saw her. They just nodded their heads and walked away. She knew it was them who had done it. She’d always been kind to them and this was their form of a thank you. She made a mental note to talk to them more often.

Spike saw the wink and looked at her amused. “Cheating on me already luv?”

“Oh ya.”she teased “You’re not enough man to keep me tied down.”

Spike growled and she stepped in closer to him. She loved it when he did that.

“Well then I quess I just need lots more practice on making you happy huh pet?”

“Oh yes, much much more” she said taking his hand and walking out of the school with him, eager for the night of “Spike proving himself” that lay ahead.


School seemed to fly by for the couple and before they knew it it was christmas break.

“So what do you want for the holiday kitten?” Spike asked as they sat on the couch drinking hot chocolate.

“Well it’s two weeks away and we have so much to do.”Buffy gushed. “We have to put lights up and get a tree, and invite our friends over for Christmas eve so that we can all celebrate together.”

Spike smiled. “I meant gift wise luv”he said giving her forehead a light kiss.

“Oh” she blushed. “I don’t know, something that says ‘us’.”

“Is that it?”Spike said laughing, “I’ll give it a try pet.”

“What about you?”

“I really don’t know luv, anything from you will be wonderful.”

“Well I cant wait for Christmas day, waking up next to you will be great. I wish mom was here.”she sniffed.

He hugged her tight. “Me too kitten, but shell be with us in our hearts, ya?”

“Ya.” Buffy said with a small smile. “Should we invite your mom?”

Spike tensed, he hadn’t spoken to her since he’d found out she’d kept Joyce’s death from him. “No pet, I don’t think we should.”

“But…”

“No but’s pet, im not ready to see or talk to her, not after what she did.”

“You forgave me for what I did.” Buffy stated gently.

Spike sighed, “I’ll phone her Christmas day, hows that sound?”

“Like a start.” Buffy said before kissing him, thoughts of what he was going to get her drifting through his mind before settling on a particular thing, he only hoped she would like it…….


 

21:
Buffy wandered through the mall with Willow while Spike walked with Xander. They were split up so they could get their “mates” their gifts.


Buffy walked into a cd store and picked up every sex pistols cd’s they had. Spikes had been lost on the airplane along with his zippo and some other things. She planned on replacing them all.

“So Wills, whats up with you and Xan?”

Willow turned beet red.

“OH MY GOD, you totally did it!”

“Ya….it was amazing Buffy. I love him so much. It’s like we were meant to be together, ya know?”

“ya I do.”

Willow saw the dreamy expression on Buffys face and was happy for her, she was finally happy. It was nice to see.

“Were pretty lucky aren’t we Wills?”

“Ya we are. Where too next?”

“Lighter store….if there is one.”

Buffy paid for the cd’s and went in search of a zippo.




Xanders eyes popped as they walked into the store Spike had chosen.

“Are you serious man?”

“Never been more serious in my life mate.”

Xander beamed at his friend, “Well good for you then.”

They walked up to the counter and started looking at the choices.



They all met u at the food court two hours later and grabbed some ice caps, it may be the holidays but it was still sweltering hot in good ol’ sunnydale.

Will and Xan kissed and Spike put his arm around Buffy. “You guys ready to leave?”

“You betcha.” Xan answered and they left the mall, each excited to give their lovers their gifts in a few short days.





(X-mas eve)

“Smells wonderful pet.”

Buffy smiled up at him. “Not bad huh?”

“Nope, not bad at all. Now you go upstairs and shower and what not, I’ll watch the food while youre getting ready.” Buffy kissed him and ran upstairs to wash up. They had gone to visit her mom that day and had both left tear streaked. Also Spike wanted her far away since he had refused to sleep with her since they went shopping, wanting them to be starved for it when he showed her her gift.

Spike sang to himself while she showered, god he loved her so much. He didn’t know what he’d do with out her.

He occasionally stirred the pots on the stove until Buffy came downstairs and his mouth dropped. She was wearing a black, spaghetti strap dress that went to mid thigh. She looked stunning.

Buffy giggled, “Your turn to wash up baby.” She said playfully pushing him to the stairs.

“But, but……”

“Go”she giggled “You can ravish me later”she added with a wink as Spike climbed the steps grumbling all the way. ‘Two can play at that game’ he thought with a smirk as he stripped and stepped under the water.



The doorbell rang just as he was coming up from his room after getting dressed. “I’ll get it kitten”he purred and brushed by her. She stood their frozen with her mouth open.

He was wearing black dress pants with a blue dress shirt. It’s top buttons were left undone so that she could glimpse the smooth skin of his collarbone. She wished he would drop something so that when he leaned over she could get a peek at his pecs, but it was not to be. She wanted to bed him right then, they hadn’t been together for a couple of days now and Buffy was getting cranky but Spike kept saying wait until Christmas, and she didn’t want to push him. Sure he’d gone down on her and what not but she wanted him in her. He hadn’t even got naked since they had gone to the mall and she couldn’t figure out why.

“Hey guys, Red you look delicious”Spike said as he gave her a small kiss to the cheek and Xan playfully added “What about me?”

“Fine then, you’re a nummy treat.” Spike joked back and they all laughed.

Willow and Buffy set the table as Spike and Xan stood outside while Spike had a smoke.

“Nervous buddy?”

“Ya.”was Spikes simple reply.

“I would be too” Xan continued.

“Not making it easier mate.”

“Sorry” Xan said and had the decency to look it.

“I just hope she doesn’t freak out.”

“She’ll most likely love it, I mean what girl wouldn’t love a gift that says ‘I’ll love you forever’?”

“I hope your right Xan.” Spike said and tossed his smoke to the curb and they walked inside to eat the feast Buffy had prepared.







They all sat around the table talking and laughing after dinner.

“That was great Buffster, you can make me dinner all the time.” Xan said rubbing his belly.

“Ya, more then once a year is too much for me.”Buffy laughed as they all started clearing the dishes.

Buffy and Spike waited for their friends to leave before they stumbled to the couch in a hungry embrace. Buffy went to pull his shirt off but he swatted her hands away. “No peeking at the goods pet.” He purred.

“But technically it’s Christmas day” Buffy argued. Spike looked at the clock, ten after twelve. She was right.

“Alright then pet.”

He stood up and peeled off his shirt, Buffy had to stop herself from drooling.

“You sure you want your gift now?”

Buffy nodded her head, expecting him to go to the tree and pick up the box that was from him but he didn’t.

Spike saw her confused look and grinned. “I got you more then one Buffy.”

He turned around slowly and her hand flew to her mouth as she stared at the tattoo that adorned his left shoulder blade. It was so fucken’ hot, she loved tattoos on guys and had mentioned it a few times to him.

“What does it mean? She asked in a breathy voice, looking at the Japanese symbol in awe.

“Immortality.”he answered.

“What made you get that one?”

“Because my love for you will never die princess”

 

22:
Buffy walked to him slowly and let her fingers trace the still sensitive mark.

“Do you mean that?” she whispered.

“More than anything pet.”

“This” she said pointing to his tattoo, “Is forever Spike.”

“So is this”he answered as he took her tiny hand and placed it over his heart.

Buffy gasped. He loved her so much, did she feel just as stongly? It took her less then a second to realize that she did.

She grabbed his head and pulled him down for a kiss. They both pulled away breathless and looked into each others eyes for a long while, before walking up the stairs and going into her room, the rest of the gifts could wait………….


“Buffy baby, I need you so much” he groaned as they fell onto her bed.

Buffy tore off his shirt and started to plant kisses along his neck and collarbone.

He pulled away for a moment to take off her dress. It looked good on her but he was convinced it would look better on the floor.

She allowed him to gently pull the soft fabric over her head and watched him as he watched her. His eyes where wide with awe and wonder. She never seen a look so filled with love and passion, and it was all for her. She felt her heart swell with pride at the knowledge that this amazing human being was hers, so completely hers as she was his.


He flipped them over so that he was on top and trailed kisses from her neck to her breasts, stopping when he reached her nipples. He took one into his mouth and sucked lightly, applying more pressure when she moaned his name. He paid the same attention to the other one and slipped his hand to her moist center.

He almost purred when he felt how wet she was for him.

“Spike…please baby, now.” She begged and he lost all control.

Positioning his head at her entrance he plunged in in one swift stroke and had to close his eyes at the bliss of being surrounded by her liguid fire made him feel.

He leaned up and looked into her eyes.

“I love you.” He thrust into her slowly at first, keeping the pace torturous for the both of them as they rocked together.

Buffy was in heaven. He filled her so perfectly, as if she’d been made for him. She began to meet his thrusts and couldn’t help but claw at his back as he hit her clit with each plunge his hips took.

“Harder…..”

Spike picked up the pace, losing himself in the feel of her warmth and her love, he wanted to stay there forever.

He could feel the telltale signs of her orgasm approaching as her muscles clenched around his cock and he groaned loudly. “Come with me baby….fuck…so good…”he mumbled. He leaned down and gently bit her neck “Mine” he growled.

“Yours” she screamed as she came with an intensity that she’d never felt before. Hearing her say that did it for Spike, with a few more thrusts he came into her convulsing pussy and roared in pleasure.

He stayed there for god knows how long, lost in the afterglow of what they’d just shared. When thought came back to him he rolled off her so that he wouldn’t be crushing her and pulled her into his arms.

“Spike?”

“Hmmmm?”he mumbled almost asleep.

“Merry Christmas” she whispered and snuggled in close to him, laying her head on his chest so that she could feel the beating of his heart.

“Merry Christmas luv” he whispered back and sleep came to claim the tired lovers.




He woke up alone again but this time didn’t let his fears have voice. He got up and stumbled down the stairs after shooting on a pair of jogging pants and looked for his princess. He found her in front of the Christmas tree shaking his gifts around.

“Couldn’t wait sunshine?”he asked amused and Buffy looked up blushing.

“You slept for too long, are all these for me?” she asked in wonder.

“everyone pet.”

“Can I open them?” She seemed so excited that he couldn’t deny her and he sat on the couch to watch.


She picked up the biggest box first and with a squeal tore the wrapping off it.

“Oh my god” she breathed. Inside was the prom dress she’d ogled at the mall but hadn’t been able to afford.

“Spike you shouldn’t have, its too expensive….” She knew that this gift alone was five hundred dollars.

“Do you like it pet?”

“Well ya but…”

“Then it was worth it.”he said smiling.

She ran to him and kissed him but he pulled away. “On to the others now luv.”he urged.

She smiled and went back to unwrapping gifts. She got a pair of shoes, earrings, a necklace and a purse that all matched her dress. She was so overwhelmed at the thoughfullness of what he’d done but decided to tease him anyway.

“Spike this is incredible, now I just have to find a date for the prom an-“

She was cut off by a low growl as he lunged at her and claimed her mouth with his. “I’ll be the one at your arm kitten.”

She laughed and playfully batted him away. That’s when she spotted the small box with her name on it. She went to grab it but he held her still, “You’ll get that one after I get my prezzies luv”
She giggled at his child like word and sat back and watched him as he unwrapped the first one.

“Soddin’ hell, the whole Sex pistols collection. You’re a goddess Buffy” he said beaming at her before turning to the others, a wicked zippo with Spike written on the front and Buffy and Spike always on the back.He opened some shirts and pants before finding the smallest gift in the pile. He opened it and his mouth dropped.

Looking at her in shock and disbelief he couldn’t form words.

Buffy just smiled and offered “It’s not the 1900’s anymore Spike, a girl can take incentive too…….unless you don’t want….”

He was all over her before she could finish that sentence. “Of course I want you Buffy, I always will.”

She took the box from her hand and got down on her knees to come face to face with him on the floor.

She took a deep breath. “Wiliam Spike Giles Calendar……will you marry me?”

 

23:
Spikes eyes almost popped out of his head. This wonderful amazing girl was asking him to spend the rest of their lives together. Was she crazy, did she really think she’d have to ask? It was a beautiful white gold band engraved in it where the words “Buffy and Spike, until the end of time.”

“Spike?” She was nervous, it was in her voice.

Spike could only bring himself to nod his head in a yes and she leapt on him screaming. Both had tears in their eyes but for once it wasn’t because they where sad….quite the opposite in fact.

They spent the rest of the day making love in various parts of the house, christening it as Spike called it. At the end of the night Spike brought Buffy’s last gift upstairs.

She tore at it greedily and her hand flew to her mouth.

“It’s beautiful baby.” He slipped it on her ring finger and they both cracked up.

“Great minds think alike huh pet?”

“Or warped ones.”she answered playfully. She looked down at her engagement ring and Spike smiled. Even though he wanted this more than anything he felt that something was wrong, that there was something that had slipped both their minds. He decided to let it go and let himself enjoy the bliss of lying next to his soon to be wife.

It felt like they’d closed their eyes for only a second before school was starting again and they where back to their hectic schedules.

But thankfully Valentines day approached quickly and Spike and Xander planned on taking their lovely ladies out for an incredible night. They where taking them to the best restaurant in town and then to Apocalypse, a ballroom dance “club”. They had each bought tuxes for the occasion and went to go pick up flowers for the ladies before going to pick them up.

Willow and Buffy paced her house nervously. All the guys had told them was to “dress real purdy”, they hadn’t let anything else slip about their plans for the evening.


Sorry this chap was so quick but its for a reason. I had to skip school details because theres gonna be more of that in upcoming chapters and frankly it bores me, plus the next chap has the angst, sigh. In the next one you’ll see why Spike was worried and I wanted that worry to stay fresh in your minds……please review if you want to see the next chap sooner, the title will be “Ballroom Blow-up”….try to figure out what happens (wa hahahaha)
I love you guys!



 

24:

“Willow you look gorgeous!” buffy gushed, seeing her red headed friend for almost the first time without a “fluffy sweater”. Instead she was dressed in an emerald green dress that hung to her knees and “ruffled at the bottom, it tied around her neck. It was stunning.

Willow blushed. “I hope so, I want Xan to be impressed, he’s never seen me in something that’s not from a nuns closet or a painters wardrobe.”

Buffy laughed. “Will you can be so dumb sometimes.”

Her friend looked hurt and Buffy rushed to explain. “Wow Wills, I totally didn’t mean it like that. What I meant was the way you dress is part of who you are and he loves everything about you, including what you wear! So do I!”

The two girls hugged and Willow pulled away first. “You know you look so hot!”Willow said laughing.

Buffy smirked. “Are you going gay on me Will? Cause if so, hands off im taken.” Buffy laughed flashing her ring.

Willow snorted. “Please Buffy, you’re so not my type anyway.”

Buffy looked in the mirror. She’d chosen a white, clingy, strapless gown that was elegant in it’s simplicity. Unlike Willow who wore her hair down in curls she had hers tied in a French twist.

She had to admit to herself, they did look pretty edible. ‘Now who would I like to eat me?’ Buffy thought to herself naughtily.

The doorbell rang a few moments later and the girls rushed to the door, only to open it as if they had casually strolled towards it at the sound of it’s chime.

The boys laughed.

“We could hear you crazy bints galloping down the stairs, cant try to hide that behind forced aloofness” Spike teased.

Buffy and Willows eyes narrowed and they looked at each other and nodded. Then Buffy slammed the door closed in their faces.

The men stood their stunned. “What the fuck just happened?”Spike gasped.

“You know for someone who’s suave as you are, you might think to not insult your date, who looks just as beautiful as mine by the way, the second they open the door to you. Show some finesse man.”

Spike blushed furiously. “Um, ya, I’ll give it a whirl then.”

Xander rang the bell again and Willow and Buffy opened it again.

“Girls, may I say how extraordinary the both of you look tonight. These flowers pale in your comparision and we hope that in your kind hearts you will accept them as a token of our love and devotion to you.”

The girls giggled and Spike’s jaw dropped. Either Xander had become a gentleman overnight or he had gotten into some Harlequin novels. The men handed their ladies their flowers and when the girls went to put them in a vase Xan leaned in and whispered, “Man you can find some primo lines in those romance books.” Spike had to suppress a snort as the ladies came into view again.

“Shall we m’lady?” Spike asked and offered his arm to her. She bowed slightly and smiled brightly at him, accepting the offer.

“You look….I really cant describe how beautiful you look Buffy.”

Buffy hung her head, trying to hide her blush. “thank you, I wasn’t really mad you know. I just wanted a different start to the evening.”

Spike felt much better when she told him that and gave her a quick kiss to her nose. “God I love everything about you sweetheart.”

“I know, and I love a couple of things about you too.”she giggled.

“A couple?” Spike fake frowned, knowing she was teasing.

“Ya, but theyre….really big things.” She said and tried to suppress her smile as Spike caught on the the innuendo and tensed. She knew she’d gotten him hard with just those words and she loved that she was gonna pay for it later tonight.


Xander drove them to the restaurant and they piled out together, walking up to the host.

“We have a reservation.” Xan said politely.

“I’m sure you do.”the man said, his face obvious with disdain.

Spike got pissed, and when he got pissed his accent came out full force, and when his accent came out full force so did the british pride that had been bashed into him since birth.

“Now listen here, sir.” Spike drew out the word sir in an upper class snobby tone, “First off my name is Mr Calendar and if you’d like to check your book you’ll see my name there. Secondly if you talk to us again with such a tone in front of these beautiful woman who deserve nothing less than your respect, then I will see to it personally that you are fired tonight.”

The man looked at the book and paled. “Mr Calendar sir, I’m terribly sorry, right this way.”

The man led them to a beautiful corner booth and they all watched as Spike gave him a twenty for tips. He looked at his name tag before handing it over. “Thank you….Larry, for seating us, now may I suggest you use the tips you make tonight to buy yourself some manners? Please be off with you then.”he said dismissively to the man who reddened and stormed away.

Spike and Xander seated the girls before sitting down themselves.

Although it was the question in everyones mind Buffy was the first to ask it.

“What the fuck was that?”

Spike smiled. “I grew up in England pet, with a rich grandmother who insisted I learn proper etiquette and what not, didn’t want to at the time but every now and then it comes in rather handy.”

Everyone at the table laughed and ordered their meals. Once their plates were cleared and it was paid the men revealed where they where taking the girls.

“Apocalypse.”the two woman breathed at the same time.

The men smiled at the awe on their girlfriends faces. Spike and Xander shared a quick look. Spike had taught Xander how to ballroom dance and they had sworn it to secrecy. They both nodded to each other to assure one another that the secret would be buried with them.


About a half an hour later they where in the dance room, they all looked around. It was large and spacious as well as beautifully decorated.

The men led their lovelies to the dance floor. The couples stood close enough to hear each other when they spoke normally but far enough apart to not hear the whispered promises of love that were meant to be private.

Buffy and Spike started to waltz together.

“I never knew you could do this.” Buffy breathed. “You’re incredible William.”

He looked into her eyes. He couldn’t remember a time he’d ever like to hear his real name but from this angels lips it sounded right. He smiled.

“Ya well…theres a few things I don’t like sharing, that I can dance to music my grandmother remembers is one of those things.”

They both laughed and looked over at their friends who seemed to be having just as good a time. And then it happened.

“Hey Spike, when you and Buffy get hitched are you getting all your stuff from home sent back here? Cause I have an uncle who can transport things for cheap from overseas.” (Xan and Willow had been discussing how great it was that Buffy and Spike were getting wed when Willow had asked how he was gonna get all his belongings here)

Spike choked on his laughter. When he got his breath back he spat out “What? Come on you wanker, you think me and the princess are gonna stay here in Sunnyhell? Where going to England.”

Buffy pulled out of his arms lightning fast. “What?” she almost screamed.

Xan winced, he felt like shit for what he’d started, he’d just assumed that Spike would be staying here, with Buffy and….him. He didn’t want to lose the only male best friend he’d ever really had.


“I’m not moving to England. How can you expect me to pack up and leave my friends, my life……my mother.” Tears where gathering in her eyes now and for once Spike couldn’t care.

“So you just expect me to leave my world for good? My mother is there Buffy, I don’t like the weather here and did you forget that my ‘Da is buried there or are you just too selfish?”

Buffy was seething. “I’m not leaving Sunnydale Spike, its here for me or nowhere.”

Spike felt like openly bawling. “But pet, I thought you loved me?”

“I do” she said gently.

“Then why wont you come with me?”

“Because my life is here.”

“And mine is in England.”he said sadly.

In a moment of panic Buffy blurted out the most horrific thing that she could. “Spike please stay here, I cant leave my home. Not yet, I cant be away from my mom, it’s too early. Besides, your mom can move here and it’s not like it’s your real dad that’s buried in England.” Her hand flew to her mouth and she broke into tears. “I’m sorry Spike.”

He could only look at her. He knew that she hadn’t meant it but it hurt like a bitch none the less. “I know you are luv’” he said gently as he took off his ring and placed it in her hand before walking out of the dance hall, not looking back once, not seeing Buffy drop to the floor in shock. But even if he had it wouldnt have mattered, they had made their decisions clear. She was staying and he simply wasnt.
 

25:
Buffy walked into the house a few hours later. Willow had brought her to her house so that she could calm down first, before seeing him. She walked into his room and turned on the light. He was just sitting there, on his bed, staring at nothing.

“Spike?” her voice was still harsh from all the crying.

“Ya kitten?”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.” A long pause. “It doesn’t change that this wont work though.”

“Maybe we just rushed into things? Maybe if we talk about it…”

“I’m really not up for a chat with you right now Buffy.”

“Okay, maybe some other time.”

“Ya, maybe.”he answered still looking at the wall.

She walked away and brushed the tears from her face. How could things go from so wrong, to so right so fast.


They didn’t talk much over the next weeks, both too afraid and not up for another round on the merry-go-round of rotating knives, not wanting their feelings cut to shreds. They were both trying to be too adult about it. They still had small converstations and sometimes they did stuff with Willow and Xander but it wasn’t the same.

Before any of them knew it it was Prom week. Buffy hadn’t even given it a moments thought, too busy trying to let go of the pain she felt.

Spike walked over to her after school and stood by her locker till she was done putting her stuff away.

“Mind if I walk you home?”

She smiled softly. “Of course not.”

They walked in silence for a few blocks before he spoke up.
“Buffy I was thinking that maybe you and I could go to the dance together, as friends. I really want to spend some time with you before I leave.”

“Spike, of course I will.”she said with false cheeryness, inside she was dying because she knew it would be the last thing they did together. She didn’t want to make things hard on him though and she bit back her tears.

This Friday night would be the last night she had with Spike, then he’d be gone. For good.


Spike was relieved and hurt at the same time. He was so grateful that she’dd agreed to go with him, he wanted to se her in the prom get up he’d bought her and he wanted their last night to be special, well as special as possible considering their circumstances.uldnt help but be angry at the how cheery she seemed though. ‘She must be over me then.’ He thought to himself as his heart broke even more.

 

26:

Spike put his tie on and looked at himself in the mirror. Blonde hair slicked back , check, tux on right, check, corsage for Buffy, check, fake smile to hide my breaking heart, check.

‘Alright then, time to get the girl.’Spike thought as he walked upstairs, he called to Buffy from the living room.

“One sec, almost ready.”she yelled down to him.

Spike paced impatiently for 20 minutes but it was worth it the moment she started to walk down those stairs.

She was wearing everything he’d given her for Christmas, including the ring. Her dress was a baby blue color that hung to her feet in what he could only call the Cinderella effect. It was strapless and she wore the necklace and earrings hed gotten to match. The shoes she wore were white, 3 inch heels that made her taller. ‘The better to dance with you’ he had told her jokingly when she’d pouted that he thought she was a midget and why did she have to wear heels even though they were gorgeous? He’d only laughed and offered to return them but she had swatted him away, admitting she wanted them.

She wore almost no make up save lip gloss and some light cream eye shadow. Her eyes were slightly accentuated with black eyeliner and she was absolutely the most breathtakingly gorgeous thing he had, or would ever see in his life.

“Do I look okay?” she asked nervously when she got to the last step and he still hadn’t said anything.

“Buffy….I…wow.”

Buffy blushed, “Speechless?”

“No pet, there just isn’t a word good enough to describe you right now.”he breathed.

“You look stunning too Spike.” She wished things where back to normal, that he could stay here with her forever, but she pushed those thoughts away. ‘At least have fun tonight, while you can’ she told herself as she took his hand and they walked to her car, driving towards their dance.




When they got there Xan and Will were waiting outside for them. After all the necessary complimenting they went inside and split up, both couples wanting to be alone with themselves. Also Xan and Will had decided to stay away from the two blondes to let them enjoy quality time. Both of them hoped secretly that this was going to clear things up between them but both of them knew how stubborn their two friends could be as well.


A few fast songs played and Buffy and Spike danced and chatted throughout it all, even having fun at some points. But then the D.J had to put a slow song on and make everything awkward. They stared at each other for a moment before stepping into each others arms and swaying to the beat. As the lyrics started to play they moved closer until not even air could get between them.

*Are we done for now,
Or is this for good,
Will there be something in time?
With us there should.

Only girl for me is you
There can be no other one
If I didn't have faith
I would come undone

So much promise in your eyes
Seems that I can only see
It always makes me wonder
If you save it all for me *
It was as though the song had been made for them and tears flooded Buffy’s eyes. “Spike…”

“I know pet, it’s hard.”
They hugged each other tightly as the song rocked them to the core.

*Maybe you do
Maybe you don't
Maybe you should
Probably wont...

Because there will be...

There will be other guys
Who will whisper in your ear
Say they'll take away you sadness
And your fears *

She looked up and cupped her face. “No one will ever replace you Spike.”
He could only lose himself in her eyes, he couldn’t form any words just yet.

*They may be kind and true
They may be good for you
But they'll never care for you
More than I do

I'll be always there
There to the end
I can't do much
But be your one true friend *

“I’ll never stop loving you Buffy Summers.”
The tears fell freely from both their eyes now and nothing they could say or do was going to stop their flow.

*To the end
Through the end
Our lives to spend
With each other till the end
Of time...

Still see the promise in your eyes
And still wonder if it's for me
But i know it's still there
Even when you sleep *

They leaned in slowly and Spike pressed his lips to hers in a kiss that bore too much pain. It was full of goodbye and sorrow and promises that hadn’t been kept.

*So I say, good night sweet girl *

He leaned his forehead on hers and held her for as moment before pulling away. When she saw the look on his face she knew that he was leaving. He whispered “I love you” and as she watched him walk away she knew that he would be come when she got home. He disappeared from view and all she could do was whisper back. “I’m sorry William.”


 

27:

It had been over a month since Spike had left now and Buffy was sick of waiting to hear from him. She wouldn’t wait anymore. He hadn’t heard her say she was sorry the night he’d left, hadn’t known how much she had wanted him to stay. She should have told him but she hadn’t, and she’d never been more sorry in her life. She’d tried phoning him a couple of times but his mom had always answered, always telling her that he wasn’t home yet. Until last night when Jenny’s answer had changed. Now he didn’t live there, not even his own mom had his new number. She’d admitted to Buffy that she and Spike had been off since Joyces funeral and had only spoken a handful of times about nothing of importance. Buffy felt bad for causing that rift between them but she also knew it was more then that. Spike couldn’t face the fact that he was the son of a rapist and it haunted him when he looked at his mom. She couldn’t tell her that though, that was for them to work out. But she was sure they would, in time the wounds would heal between them. But Buffy wasn’t sure that her and Spike would be that lucky.



It had been three months now and he still hadn’t called Buffy back once. He couldn’t. He didn’t want to have a “Hows the weather down there buddy” conversation with her. Not with her. Not with the woman who had stolen his heart.

He picked up his guitar and started to play for the crowd at the pub he was playing at. It was a new song, on he’d written about them.

*There's a pain that sleeps inside
It sleeps with just one eye
And awakens the moment that you leave
Though I try to look away
The pain it still remains
Only leaving when you're next to me

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay

So I stand and look around
Distracted by the sounds
Of everyone and everything I see
And I search through every face
Without a single trace, of the person
The person that I need

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay

Can you make them disappear?
Make them disappear

There's a pain that sleeps inside
Sleeps with just one eye
And awakens, the moment that you leave
And I search through every face
Without a single trace, of the person
The person that I need

Do you know, that everytime you're near
Everybody else seems far away
So can you come and make them disappear
Make them disappear and we can stay*

He put down his guitar and walked off the stage, not hearing the cheers from the crowd or the cries for an encore. Once he got behind the curtain he wiped his eyes roughly. Why had he left her? He could have just stayed, it’s not like he needed to be here in England and he could come visit his dad whenever he wanted to. He only had to look at a single star to talk to him when he felt the need anyway. It was probably too late now, she probably had someone else. Best to leave it be.



5 months later


“I’m sorry Parker this just isn’t working out.”

“Oh, well, do you wanna fuck goodbye then?” he asked with a nasty smirk.

She sighed and put the money for her coffee down on the table. “Parker you reject, if I didn’t fuck you while we where dating why in gods name would I fuck you now you moron?”

“For the memories.”

Buffy couldn’t help but laugh. “I have enough bad memories.”she shot back as she walked away. This whole dating thing just wasn’t working. She had to do something and she had to do it now.




(A few days after….)

Spike hung up the phone with Xander. He’d finally phoned his friends and he had eaten a lot of shit for not doing it sooner. When he’d asked about Buffy Xander had told him simply, “She has a date.” Spike had let him go a moment later, promising he would phone again soon. He lifted his head high, she was on a date and it didn’t bother him. ‘Stop lying to yourself you ponce’ he mentally chastised himself. Well, it did bother him but if she was happy he was happy for her. In a few moments he had to be onstage to sing his newest song, again it was about his Buffy, but this one was a much happier one. He’d decided to write about how good he had felt when he was with her instead of how bad he felt when he wasn’t.





Buffy’s eyes scanned the crowd. There were enough people there to make it difficult for her to see him. She pushed her way almost to the front when she heard it. Well, him, to be exact and she froze.

“Well here we go guys, it’s about her again.”

He laughed as the crowd went berserk and started to play. He’d given the a small overview of him and Buffy after a couple of people had called out questions one night after his show. He always sang with his eyes closed, he could picture her that way.

*In, I'm falling in
I didn't want to
Not so fast, boy
Slow,
Don't wanna hurt the girl
Give her a pretty box
You better fill it
And I get blinded when she opens the door
It's like looking into the sun, you know
And I'm just blinkin', moanin', starin' at my shoes
And she just looks at me
And smiles
Smiles
Smiles

Oh, there we go again
And it feels so good
I'm fallin' up and down
Damn, it's 2 AM again
And she kisses me goodbye
For the sixteenth time
And I'm driving home, it's 2 AM
And I look at the sun come up over the hills
And the clouds are turning pink and green
And all I can see is her eyes
Eyes
Eyes

I get blinded when she opens the door
It's like looking into the sun, you know
And I'm just blinkin', moanin', starin' at my shoes
And she just looks at me
And smiles
Smiles
Smiles*


The applause was deafening, someone in the back yelled “For fuck sake, go after her already man” and everyone laughed, including him.

“Not that easy Wesley” he yelled back.

Just then a girl bumped into Buffy, pushing her through the few people in front of her, right into the front. Right into his view.

He dropped his guitar and stood there, not believing what he saw.

“Or maybe it is.”he whispered.


Buffy tentatively walked to the stage and he offered her his hand. Grabbing it she was pulled into his arms, he was holding her so tightly she couldn’t breathe and she didn’t care at all.

He was crying openly in front of her and everyone in the pub and he didn’t give a flying fuck. His princess was here in the flesh and he wasn’t gonna let her go.

He looked at his fans and a huge grin broke onto his face. He turned her around so that they could see her.

He took her backstage and pinned her against the wall, crushing her lips to his in a kiss that screamed with need. Both of them pulled away panting and they could hear the crowd cheering for them. They looked at each other and smiled.

“How long you staying pet?”he asked suddenly fearful that she wouldn’t be there long.

“For as long as it takes.”came her simple reply.

“For as long as what takes kitten?”

“To do things right this time.”

They kissed again and both of them knew that they wouldn’t mess it up this time, that this time they would get it right. They couldn’t go back to being with out each other, they’d tried that and failed miserably. Problems would come and go, tears would be shed by both, some days they would drive each other crazy, but they both knew that it would be worth it.

Spike looked her in the eyes and frowned slightly. “Didn’t you have a date tonight?”

“Yu-huh.” She giggled.

“With who?”he growled.

“With destiny.”she snorted right after saying it and Spike cracked up.

“That was awful pet.”he said with a grin.

“I know but Buffy comes with bad jokes, take it or leave it.”she teased.

“Well I know I’ll never leave it.”he said hugging her again.

“Promise?”

“You know it’s true luv’”

“I know but I want you to swear it on something, so I know you’ll always be there.

“I swear it on my soul.”

She wanted to keep the moment semi-playful, she knew that they both had a lot to talk about and that they had to work out a lot of issues, things had to be worked out properly before they could truly be together again but she also knew that talking about these things in a dirty hallway of a pub was not where it should happen. It should be done in a house, or a bedroom…….she thought with a cheeky grin.

Spike knew that this was definitely not the place to discuss their reconciliation and the plans for the future and knew she felt the same way when her face went from serious to smirking.
“You have a soul?”

“Ya, kind of stings.” He replied before they walked out the back door hand in hand into daylight that warmed their faces, while they warmed each others hearts.


 

Epilogue:

2 years later
----------------

Spike picked up his guitar and smiled out at the crowd. “Good news guys, weve been signed!”

The crowd went crazy, he had been playing there for about three years and had finally got a break.

Things with him and Buffy where great. They’d been married in the summer of the previous year. It had taken time to work past their issues but they had done it.

He waited until the crowd quieted down and spoke again.

“This one’s about me and mine.” He said giving Buffy a wink, she was sitting at her usual place right in the front. She smiled at him. “It’s a new one so I hope I get it right” he said with a small smile. He hadn’t even let Buffy hear it yet, he had wanted to see her face when she heard it.

*Lying in my bed i hear the clock tick,
and I think of you
caught up in circles
confusion is nothing new
Flashback, warm nights
almost left behind
suitcases of memories,
time after *

God they’d almost lost so much as he sang while staring into Buffys eyes, seeing them tear. His eyes never left hers as he continued.

*Sometimes you picture me
I'm walking too far ahead
you're calling to me,
I can't hear what you've said
Then you say , go slow
I fall behind
the second hand unwinds*

She was so lucky to have him. That theyd had a second chance to do things right. Some people never got that, she mouthed the words I love you.


*If you're lost you can look - and you will find me
time after time
If you fall I will catch you - I'll be waiting
time after time*

Buffys hand flew to her mouth and tears streamed down her cheeks. Those where the vows Spike had spoken to her on their wedding day. The vows he’d repeated before making love to her that night. The vows he’d whispered WHILE making love to her that night. Spike saw her and smiled.

*After my picture fades
and darkness has turned to gray
watching through windows
you're wondering if I'm O.K.
secrets stolen from deep inside
the drum beats out of time*

Spike hated that their had been a time when they had not been together but this song represented their whole relationship, and he knew that Buffy would understand that. She was his goddess and he would die for her in a second. The only regret he’d have if that happened would be that he wouldn’t be able to see her beautiful face looking up at him, that was how much he loved her.



*If you're lost you can look
and you will find me
time after time
If you fall I will catch you
I'll be waiting I will be waiting
time after time*
...

You said go slow -
I fall behind
the second hand unwinds -


If you're lost you can look
and you will find me
time after time
If you fall I will catch you
I'll be waiting
time after time*

...time after time
time after time
time after time
time after time*



He played out the last notes to the song and everyone was hushed for a moment. Then the cheering began. He’d never heard them so responsive before and couldn’t help smiling with pride.“Did you like it?”he asked as he jumped from the stage to sit with her and hold her hand.

“It was so beautiful Spike.”she gushed.

“Of course it was pet, it was about you.” He whispered and placed a small kiss to her forehead and she leaned into him.

“She’s acting up tonight.” Buffy said and rubbed her tummy again.

“He’s definitely got spirit” Spike said as he put his hand over hers, “Little Billy is gonna be-“

She cut him off. “For the last time Spike if we have a boy im not naming him Billy just cuz you like some freaky singer guy.”

Spike gasped. “Billy Idol was an icon, it’s a good, strong name to have.”he pouted.

“Ya and so is Spike.”she said and snorted.

“Hey whats wrong with Spike?”

“I wish I knew.”, her face let him know she was only playing around and he joined in.

“And the name Buffy just screams Yale graduate”he teased back.

She fake sulked until a smile lit her pretty little face.

“What you smiling at kitten?”

“We sound like an old married couple with all the bickering.”she said laughing.

“Well it’s good practice isn’t it luv?”

“Practice for what?”she asked confused.

“For when we’re an old married couple. I’ll never let you go pet.”he said nuzzling her neck.

“I’d never let you.”she whispered and leaned in to kiss him.

The baby kicked again harder then it ever had. “Oh ya, it’s definitely your son.” Buffy said with a roll of her eyes. Spike smirked and she couldn’t help but love the fact that she had the rest of her life to see him look at her like that.

All of a sudden she gasped as she felt one his hands slip under her skirt and he had a wicked shine in his eyes. she knew that some things would never change, no matter what.






The end, I hope you guys liked it, im not sure if I did lol but I did the best that I could so review if you want, it would be nice. Thanx to all my readers and reviewers if it hadn’t been for you guys I might never have started this fic! I love you all!