Light in the Dark
The shadow is what you see, behind the shadow is what she found
Prologue
William was sitting at his home office flipping through the files on his desk. Angel, his lawyer was sitting at the chair opposite his trying to talk some sense into him since he came in to drop off his workload which seemed to have grown into a mountain the last couple of months. “Listen to me Spike, you have got to get off your butt. We have to take action now! Cause I know your in-laws are sure not just gonna sit back on this.”
“Will you please give a bloke time to adjust!” he hollered as he ran his hand through his hair and flipped briskly through the piles of documents he had to take care of. “We’ll deal with them when the time comes!” Angel raised both his hands as a sign of surrender. He knew when to back off when William’s really pissed. “And don’t call me that.”
“Don’t call you what?” Angel asked as he rose from his seat and walked over to the door. He could swear he heard a sound coming from down the hallway.
“Spike.” He spat out, as the sounds Angel heard increased, as it turned out it were cries, cries of a baby.
“Aren’t you gonna take care of that?” Angel asked as he turned back from the hallway.
“Joyce!” he called, “Joyce!” A woman around her early forties appeared on the door. “Didn’t I tell you to keep her quiet? I’m trying to work here!” He ordered her without looking up from the papers in front of him. The woman just nodded her head and went to sooth the crying baby.
“You know, Sp- Will. I think I have a solution for your little problem over there.” He pertained to the crying of a baby just before which seemed to have vanished.
“Yeah, and what is that exactly?” William asked still not looking up at Angel. “Get a nanny?” he scoffed with a sarcastic laugh.
Angel just had a devious smile on his face. “Why not?” This time he did look up.
To be continued...
The dock was filled with people getting in and out of ships. As another ship anchored itself on the shore, mounts of people started to get off. Families, businessmen and couples from their honeymoons filled the docks as each and every passenger got off. Just as it seemed no one would be coming out the ship, one blonde girl pulling her luggage came out. She was looking around as if searching for someone until she heard a shout.
“Buffy! Buffy!” A redhead called from behind the waiting shed. “Over here!” she jumped up and down just in case the woman wouldn’t see her.
“Willow!” the blonde ran over to the woman leaving her luggage on the middle of the dock in the process as she gave her cousin a big hug. “Oh my god! It’s been so long…” she grabbed her bag as they walked over to the parking lot. “You look good, cuz! So how you’ve been?”
Buffy’s cousin just rolled her eyes. Some things never change.
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Buffy and Willow were sitting in a little teashop talking about Buffy’s trip. She had been studying in America for the last couple of years taking up nursing. She came to London because there was a job offer she wanted to apply for here, so she thought she’d stay here for the time being and visit her cousin Willow and get a feel of the place if she ever gets the job that is. “So is the old SunnyD still the same?”
“You mean boring, boring, high crime rates and boring? Then yes,” both of the women laugh at that. Sunnydale or as they call SunnyD was where the two cousins have grown up. Their mothers were the best of friends so naturally and so where they. They have lived across from each other and they haven’t been separated since the day Willow came to London to work. “So how long will you be staying here, Buff?”
“I don’t know really… I mean the job doesn’t start until after Christmas but I could always stay for a couple of weeks and hang-out.” She took a sip from her cup of tea, a typical delicacy in London. “Take a look around the city or something.”
Willow chewed the remaining scones inside her mouth and swallowed before she answered. “Oh, that would be awesome except… I have a job to get back to. Boss is not very nice this past few weeks.”
“Oh it’s okay.” Buffy simply dismissed it. “I can entertain myself.”
“Wish we could spend more time together…” Willow offered her a smile of sympathy.
“I’ll be fine… I just have no idea what I’ll do when I get back to Sunnydale that is.”
“Well you can stay here longer,” Willow offered. “Maybe you could get an apartment here or something. Better yet, you could become a London gal and live here permanently.”
“Like you?” The redhead nodded. “Umm… I don’t know, that’s almost three months of nothing but lounging around and watching television,” Buffy said and as she did she realized it isn’t so bad after all…Buffy was apprehensive. True she had nothing else better to do, unless she gets that nursing job, her life is really going in no direction at all. “Plus there’s the problem of finding a place to stay.”
“Like you wouldn’t be doing the same thing if you were in Sunnydale.” Willow gave her a pleading smile at least she thought it looked like she was pleading. They were the only two relatives remaining in their families that still had constant communication so she thought that they should at least stick together. Before Willow could give Buffy another reason why she should stay, her cell phone rang. “Excuse me.” She said as she flipped the device open. “Hello… yeah… I’ll be right there… uhuh… yeah… okay.” By this time Willow already have a smile on her face glancing to Buffy from time to time. “I think I know the perfect candidate.” She said loud enough for Buffy to hear and let her curiosity rise with it. “Okay, thanks Joyce. Bye” she flipped the phone back down.
“Who was it?” Buffy asked.
“I think I just found the perfect job for you.”
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“Welcome Miss Willow!” the security greeted as they entered the big gates of the Bennedict Mansion. On their way up the mountain-shaped driveway Buffy thought how she actually got herself in this situation. After the phone call the redhead had got at the teashop. She plainly insisted that applying for this job is the best opportunity for the two of them to spend some time together. She’ll be getting extra money, and a rent-free apartment too, so according to Willow it was win-win situation no matter from what point of view you look at it from.
Sure Willow maybe right, this is a great opportunity for her to kill time while she stayed in London but she was trained to be a nurse, not a nanny nor a sitter. Of course she can probably do the job if she was asked to but she’s not really that eager about it. Especially when the only thing she knew about their so called ‘boss’ was that he was rich.
As they finally reached the main door of the mansion she was astounded on how big the house really was. From the road you could see that it was vast but up close it was GIGANTIC! Like the pyramid of Giza except not in a pyramid form.
The butler greeted them on their way in as she passed the threshold she was welcomed by the twin stairs leading up to the second floor. A woman came down from the said steps, she was around her forties and was holding a small bundle around her arms.
“Hello Willow!” she greeted them. “You must be Buffy,” she reached her hand out as she shifted the bundle in one arm. “Welcome. I’m Joyce and this is Prudence” she held the bundle out for her to see.
Buffy took a look and what she saw was probably the most beautiful baby she had ever laid eyes on. Prue had pale skin, chocolate brown eyes and dark black hair she was a perfect representation of a dark beauty. “Oh God, she’s adorable!”
“Yeah isn’t she?” Joyce rubbed Prue’s nose sounding like the proudest mother in the world. “Just like her mum.” Buffy tried to touch her face and she crocked her nose at her, which caused them all to smile.
“So you’ll be meeting Mr. Bennedict right?” Joyce asked as she held the baby in her arms and started to swing her from side to side. “We could definitely use a helping hand here around the house.”
“Yeah… I guess…” Buffy replied unsure.
“Of course she will.” Willow said dismissively. “But that’s for later, he’s still not home yet. I have to show you the quarters!” she said quite excitedly as she excused both of them from Joyce. She led Buffy around the room through the kitchen and across the garden and into a small cottage at the back of the house. As they opened the door, inside was a tiny living room, a round dinning table with a kitchenette at the back and a row of doors, which she guessed was the bedrooms. “Here it is,” the redhead presented. “You can drop your things over there,” she pointed in the direction of the rows of doors and went into the kitchen to prepare a cup of tea. “So, Sir Will said that we could have this cottage all to ourselves once you get the job. Isn’t that awesome?!” Buffy heard Willow say from the kitchen as she dropped her things in her soon-to-be new room.
The room was simply decorated with essential furnishings. There was bed in the middle of the room, a side table, a dresser, a rocking chair and a study table by the window. “Of course you’ll be at the house most of the time taking care of Prue but still,” Willow peeked her head into Buffy’s room. “When you have some free time we can pretty much do anything we want here. Tea is almost ready why don’t you come out and we’ll have a chat.”
“Okay, I’ll be right out.” Buffy smiled as her cousin vanished into the kitchen. She dropped her suitcase on the bed and took a seat as she surveyed the room. ‘Pretty posh for a maids quarters’ she thought but she could make it work. “So what is ‘Sir Will’ like exactly?” she asked as she sat on the chair by dinning table where the tea was waiting.
“Well…” Willow brought some biscuits out, “He was nice and very generous. There’s nothing to be afraid off if that’s what you mean. He’s a total gentleman. Plus he’s a hottie.” Willow couldn’t help but giggle at that. Buffy just raised her brow at her as if saying ‘hottie?’ “Of course not in a boyfriend kind of way, just in an I appreciate how he looks… kind of way.”
“Ooookay…” Buffy nodded her head as she took a sip of her tea. “So what do you mean he was nice?”
“Well… there was that whole thing with-“ ‘knock knock’. Somebody was at the door, interrupting their discussion.
As Willow went to the door Buffy thought of what she was really doing. ‘He was nice’ was, meaning past tense. What did she get herself into. “Oh come in Giles.” Buffy heard Willow invite somebody in. “Buffy, I’d like you to meet Giles.” The redhead introduced her to a man about her father’s age. He had thinning gray hair and is he British? “He’s Sir Will’s chauffeur.”
“Oh, it’s so nice to meet you Buffy. Willow has told us loads about you.” Giles offered his hand for her to shake.
Definitely British, she concluded. “I hope it’s nothing too bad now is it?” she joked which caused Giles dole out a laugh as she shook his hand. There was another knock at the door as Willow went and answered it.
“So, are you nervous of meeting Will?” Giles asked.
“A little” Buffy admitted.
“Well, you needn’t worry. I’m sure it’ll go well.”
“I hope…” she replied with a smile. “Buffy, Sir William’s home,” she heard Willow call from the threshold as Joyce threw her a wave. ‘Oh my God! Brace yourself Summers…’
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“No experience… Just got out of college…” William recited as he interviewed Buffy.
Willow was in the room sitting right beside her but she didn’t know what to feel. Willow’s description that he was nice was a total understatement. For the few minutes she had been sitting in the study she had been grilled. Sir Will was cruel. He hasn’t said anything good about Buffy. He hasn’t even made her feel like she was welcome or that he was pleased that she would want to work for him. Basically she was treating her like a maid. Which wasn’t so bad because that was what she was technically applying for. Willow was right about one thing though, he was a hottie with a sexy accent… but that soo does not make up for his atrocity.
“I’m not seeing anything good here… Ms. Summers is it?” he asked her and Willow replied for her with a nod. “Why should I hire you? I have no idea if you really know how to take care of a baby…?”
“For one thing,” Buffy answered keeping eye contact in the process, “Willow recommended me which already guarantees you that I can be trusted… well more or less. And since I was trained to be a nurse I got to know a thing or two about babies… and lastly.” She emphasized, “I’m your only choice.”
William was surprised, it was the only word that could possibly describe his expression, that and impressed. This girl was feisty! Something he very much liked, but of course he wouldn’t let her know that, he is after all her boss. Suppressing a smile, “Okay, you’re hired.”
“Thank you.” was Buffy’s reply.
“If you have any questions. I’m sure Willow here would be glad to answer that for you,” he explained. “That’s all I guess… you’re dismissed.”
“Excuse me?” Buffy inquired, ‘dismissed?’
“You can leave…” Buffy just nodded and walked with Willow out the door.
“Oh and Ms. Summers.” William called just before they were out the door. “One more thing, I detest it when people disturb me when I’m working. If you like to keep your job...” he trailed off. “Do I make myself clear?”
With a swallow from Willow and a nod from Buffy, the two turned around and left the room.
To be continued...
A/N: Review?
“Can you please cut these into cubes dear?” Joyce asked as she went over to the stove and continued mixing the pot of chowder she was making.
Buffy had been part of the Bennedict household for the last couple of weeks. Working here was not as terrible as she had first thought. Taking care of Prue was no problem at all. She was what some would call a quiet baby. She would take her naps at the right time, eat her meals with no agitation and made darling gestures whenever she could. She couldn’t possibly contemplate why William would need to hire a nanny. He could just pick her up once in a while an—
There was something she noticed these last couple of weeks she was in the house. William never once visited Prudence’s room to play with her, bring her new toys or even give her a kiss goodnight when he would arrive home. Actually the only time she ever saw him go near her bedroom was when he was calling for Willow who at that time was helping Buffy fold some of Prue’s clothes. That was something she found really strange, usually for a first time dad, at least she assumed he was a first time dad since there were no other children in the house. Most dads would be ecstatic about going home and playing with their little ones but William seemed to be just the complete opposite of what one would assume a dad would react. And another thing she had been meaning to ask Willow or pretty much anybody in the household… where was Prue’s mom.
“Joyce?” Buffy continued chopping the carrots into cubes, “I sort of have a question.”
Joyce lowered the fire over the pot and then went over and sat across Buffy in the kitchen island. “What is it?”
“I was just wondering…” Buffy fidgeted as she continued her dicing. Joyce offered her an encouraging façade asking her to continue. “I just wanted to ask… where’s Prue’s mother?”
A dreary expression passed the woman’s face before she gave Buffy a small smile. “Well…” she hesitated.
“It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me,” Buffy backtracked, it was really none of her business. “I’m sure it’s nothing I should know about.”
“Nonsense. You want to know I’ll tell you.” Joyce insisted as she herself grabbed a knife and started chopping the other vegetables. “About a couple of months back. William and Drusilla, that’s her name, went out and went to a party. They had left Prudence with us. I think she was still around a couple of weeks old then. They left and I remember that Prue was right there.” She pointed to the nearby counter top. “I was heating her milk and then there was a call from the hospital saying that Dru had been rushed into the emergency room.”
“They said there really was no need to call us since Will was there but he was beginning to become a wreak waiting outside the operating room so they thought it best call for us. Immediately I rushed over with Mr. Giles and left Prue with Willow.” She rose from her seat and placed the vegetables they have finished chopping into the pot and sat back down to continue her story. “When I reached the waiting area I saw him sitting there and staring out into space. He didn’t say a single word. I had to talk with the nurse at the desk to ask what had happened and she just said that Mrs. Bennedict was already dead. I was at a lost I didn’t know what to say. When I tried to ask what happened all they said was that she had lost a lot of blood and that she was already bleeding when Will had brought her in.” Joyce breathed in deep, trying to hold back the tears pricking her eyes from the memory she had just dug up. “When they asked him what really happened he didn’t want to talk, said that it wouldn’t do anything to help. He right down refused to tell anything to them so that’s all that I know.”
“He had been killing himself about it these past months. He hardly ate and was in bed most part of the day, not going to work until last week when Angel practically had to drag him into the shower and down the stairs just to let him get some work done.”
“Angel?” Buffy asked. She had been overwhelmed with the story she had just heard. She couldn’t imagine the things that William must have felt when he learned about his wife dying. They had just had a baby and now she was already dead, just like that.
“That’s his lawyer” Joyce replied. “Don’t ask how he got his name,” she explained her unasked question.
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“Yeah… Peaches. I’ll get to it okay!” William half shouted into the receiver as he slammed it down. Angel had been bugging him about this and about that. That they should take action now blah…blah. “Bloody hell!” he exclaimed as he tried to work his way through the mounts of paper on his desk.
“Waahhh… Waahh…” there was a cry from the end of the hall.
William tried to ignore the cries as he ran his hands through his hair. “God damn it! Where’s that nanny!” he cursed as the cries got louder. Finally giving up he rose from his seat and made his way down the hall to the slightly ajar bedroom door of his daughter.
As he entered the cries decreased into whimpers. He walked over to the crib and looked down on the little bundle below. Prue was staring right at him big brown eyes watering with tears. Immediately William’s heart melted at that as he gave his little girl a small smile he let his hands touch her sides which she complied with by placing her small hand around his finger.
“Dada…” she said or at least that’s what William thought she had uttered with her tongue.
For the first time since…well a long time a genuine smile had form in his face. All William could do was stare back into those chocolate brown eyes in astonishment. His little girl could talk she just said ‘dada’ his mind was screaming. ‘DADA’ you git. She just said ‘dada’.
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“I think this will be ready in just a bit.” Joyce announced as she returned the cover of the pot back on. “Can you get me a couple of bowls my dear.” She asked Buffy.
“Waahh…Waahh” they heard from the monitor on the kitchen counter.
“Oh, that must be Prue” Buffy said as she handed the bowls to Joyce as the cries got louder. “Better hurry before Sir Will’s head explodes,” she joked as she ran out the kitchen and up the stairs.
As she was walking down the hall, she heard the cries lower both on the monitor in her hand and the sounds coming from the room. Her feet moved faster fearing the worst for Prudence never stopped crying until somebody came to her aid. As she neared the door. She heard a voice from inside.
“That’s right princess, it’s daddy. And it’s all going to be alright…” she heard… was it William? She peeked her head through the door and her assumption was right. It was indeed William beside the bassinet running his hands beside Prue as if afraid that if she held her he would hurt her.
“You know, she likes it better when somebody holds her,” Buffy said as she passed under the threshold and walked over to the bassinet. “Don’t you want to carry her?” she offered.
William faced him with that similar expression of blankness, “what I want, is to be able to get my work finished. And the only way I’ll be getting that is by not being disturbed. Meaning… I want peace and quiet.” He told Buffy as he backed away from her ready to go out that door. “Do you understand Ms. Summers? I hope this does not happen again.” He said lastly as he vanished from Buffy’s sight.
Buffy was in utter shock as William exited the door. How numb and crude can a person be. Did he just change his attitude in a flick of a finger? Buffy couldn’t believe how pretentious he was being. It was obvious that he was having a good time staying with his daughter and then… and then… ‘gaah’ she cried. And why does he keep calling her Ms. Summers?
She was momentarily distracted by the cries a certain baby was making below her. As she picked her up and swayed her from side to side to get her back to sleep. She had one goal in mind, to make William realize what he’s missing, someway somehow she’d be able to make him see that being with his daughter isn’t as terrifying as he had seemed to have perceived it to be. ‘Somehow…’
To be continued...
Chapter 3
“Meeting at nine, brunch with the Simpsons, board meeting at two and Mr. Angel asks to speak to you.” Said a brunette holding a clipboard in front of her as she told William his agenda for the next day.
“Peaches is making appointments now?” He asked sarcastically.
“No. His secretary called and told me that he was on his way over… now.” she said that last part simultaneously with the opening of the door of the study where Angel came strolling in. “I’ll leave you two alone.” She said as she went out the door closed behind a brunette holding a baby boy that had just entered.
“A visit? Wow, did something horrific happened that you had to come here for… and you brought in the whole family…” he said as he waved to Angel’s wife and kid at the back getting themselves comfortable on the sofa by the door.
“Haha!” Angel swinged his leg over the table and got in on what William is reading. “Guess you did hire a nanny huh?” he said as he held the piece of paper in the air to read. “Summers… pretty girl…” he said as he saw her picture and replaced the resume back on the table.
“Yeah… pain in the butt more like if you ask me…” he scoffed.
“Anyway… I’m here to REMIND you—“
“Yeah…yeah…” he cut him off as he waved his hand in the air and approached the mother and child.
“Have you looked—“
“How’s our little bit here…” he said as he swept the baby boy off her mom’s arms and swung him in the air which caused the baby to laugh out loud. “Daddy taking care of you rather than,” he threw a glance Angel’s way, “getting into other people’s business.”
Angel gave up and sent off a sigh as he flapped his arms in the air as if saying, ‘fine…fine.’
“Actually, there are other reasons why we came here,” the woman said speaking for the first time.
“And what is it then?” he asked nonchalantly as he continued making funny faces for the baby to laugh at.
“It’s Conner’s birthday this coming weekend and we’re having a party at the manor. We thought you could come being Conner’s godfather and all and you could bring Prue along too… you know to let her meet other kids.” She invited him.
“Oh, I don’t know… Cordelia,” he declined as he set Conner back into her mother’s arms and started for his desk. “I have a lot of work to catch up to and I’m not very good with the kids.”
“Not good with kids!” Angel exploded, “you were just playing with Conner for God’s sake!” As soon as the words came out of his mouth he regretted it and asked Cordelia and Conner to go on and look for Prue and keep her company while he talks some sense into William. As soon as they were out the door, “Is there something wrong that you are not telling me?”
“There’s nothing wrong… okay,” he replied, “I’m just not in the mood for a party, that’s all.”
“Not in the mood…” he echoed. “You have to get over her Will. She would have wanted you to.”
William darted a threatening look over his way, “It has nothing to do with that!”
“What is about then?” he answered back, “Is it about Prudence?”
“Why do you always presume it has something to do with her?” he asked quite defensively. “I just don’t want to go!” and they continued ramming down each other’s throat but neither getting anywhere.
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“Hey can I come in?” Cordelia asked as she tapped on the door and entered Prue’s bedroom where Buffy was watching over her by the playpen. “I’m Cordy” she introduced herself, “Angel’s my husband,” she said as she set Conner down beside Prue.
Buffy complied with a smile. “I’m –“ she extended her hand to shake.
“Buffy.” Cordelia cut her off. “I know,” she responded with a tight smile. “I think they’re having an argument or something, you know how they are.”
“Actually, I don’t… I’m new here.” She said as she continued to watch Prue go over to Conner’s side and grab her stuff Barney away from him. “Prue, learn to share,” she chided her as she grabbed the stuff animal and brought it back to Conner.
“Oh, yeah Angel told me,” she answered as she gave Buffy an uncanny look ‘that is one in control nanny’.
“Prue!” she chided yet again as the baby continued to take away every single toy Conner took interest in.
“She’s not very good at sharing now is she,” Cordelia observed as she pick Conner up and brought him over to the floor in the middle of them and gave him a stuff pig instead.
“No I don’t think so,” Buffy concluded. “I guess she’s not use to having playmates.”
“You should bring her to the park sometime.” Cordy suggested, “Me and Conner always go to this one down Oxford Street, it’s really nice, very clean.”
“Okay… we’ll definitely see that as an option.”
“Honey…” they simultaneously directed their view at the door as Angel pushed it open. “We should go.”
“Well, it’s nice meeting you Buffy.” Cordy bid goodbye as she carried Conner up. “I’ll see you at the party?”
“Party?” she asked bewildered.
“Yeah, Conner’s birthday Party this weekend,” he voice faded as she went deeper out the hall.
‘Party…’ Buffy thought and just like that a light bulb appeared on the top of her head.
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“Cancel that brunch with the Simpson’s, Faith.” William ordered as he walked through the hall and down the stairs. “I’m not in the mood to see that jackass. Postpone—“
He was interrupted as Buffy can tramping in from behind, “Excuse me, sir.” William looked back and asked Faith to move on as he continued his decent down the stairs and asked Buffy to continue. “Ms. Cordy had mentioned that Conner would be having a party this weekend and I was just wondering if what time it was gonna be so I can get Prue ready.”
“We’re not going,” he simply replied as he grabbed his briefcase from Willow and proceeded for the door.
“But-“
“I’m not going Ms. Summers,” he paused and gave her his resolve.
“Sir, I think it would really help Prue with her socializing with kids, she became very-“ Buffy said as she ran after his retreating form.
“We are not going Ms. Summers, what word of that don’t you understand?”
“I just-“
“No. We are not going” he insisted, “if you want to go and take her to the party… fine! Ask Rupert to take you… I can drive myself for the day.” He said as he got in the car and sped down the driveway.
Buffy just stood there dumbfounded, ‘he really does have a lot of issues!’ she concludes as she made her way back into the house. “Hey,” she heard someone say from behind. “He wasn’t like that before you know…”
“Excuse me?” she said as she turned around to see William’s secretary standing behind her holding her clipboard close to her chest.
“I’m Faith. William’s secretary.” He introduced herself as they made their way into the kitchen.
“Buffy,” she complied.
“I know, you’re the nanny.” Faith threw her a smile, “I got you resume this morning.” Buffy raised an eyebrow at her direction. “He asked for it.” She just nodded her head in understanding. “So, how’s he treating you?”
“Is bad enough of a word to describe it?” she said with a smile, which caused the brunette to laugh. “But no really… he’s just…” Buffy trailed off.
“Cold?” she supplied.
“Yeah,” she agreed.
“Damn hot though!”
“Uh huh,” Buffy said trying to sound like she didn’t care. Of course she definitely agreed if there was something on the positive side of William’s attitude it was that he was attractive and that’s about it, at least that’s what Buffy insisted on.
“He was so different before.” Faith reminisced, “So cocky! Not that, that was any better but…After that he just dramatically changed.”
“After what?” she asked though already having a slight idea on what the brunette was referring to.
But Faith continued on as if not hearing a word, “Of course who could blame him… I guess he just wouldn’t want to get too attached just in case…” she caught herself just before she said it.
“In case what?” Buffy asked intrigued. Maybe this could possibly help her with her hopeless mission or maybe not but she just really wanted to know.
“I’ve already said too much,” Faith replied cryptically. Buffy opened and closed her mouth a couple of times trying to interrupt but Faith just went on and on. “I think I better go, get back to the… yeah…” she said as she swiftly disappeared out of the door.
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“Be careful, Prue.” Buffy reminded as if the she could understand her as she played with the piles of leaves on the garden had fallen from the trees. Going under and jumping over them. “So what was that you were saying?” Buffy asked her cousin as she took on last look at Prue’s direction.
“I said, I think that you should consider staying here longer,” Willow said as she and Buffy sit underneath the oak tree watching Prue play with the many leaves that have fallen off because of the season. She deliberately asked the gardener to keep them in one pile this morning because she wanted to see how Prue would react to multitudes of leaves at her dispense. “You’re really doing Prue a lot of good.” And indeed she was the baby had been closer to Buffy than anybody else in the household. She had been giving her extra attention more than what she was used to and Willow knew that, that was something Prue really needed especially with the absence of her mother and her almost always absentee father.
“I don’t think I’m fit for the job, Willow…plus William already hates my guts as it is.” Buffy really enjoyed her job more than she would have expected she would. She never knew how much she loved kids until now, she wanted to teach Prue so much… she wanted to show her so much of what is out there in the world. It’s such a shame that her father hardly takes her out to the park, to the mall or even around their mansion of a house. All day she’s always kept within the quarters of her room not being able to see anything except the pink walls of her bedroom. She couldn’t see herself staying here longer than she’s needed. She knows that William would be more than glad to fire her if only he had another choice and she’s not going to go against his wishes. “As soon as there’s a replacement I’ll go.”
“I don’t think he hates you per say… to tell you the truth I think he likes you.” Willow commented as she watched Prue crawl underneath the heft of leaves then stick her head out right in the middle giggling in the process.
“Like me?” she scoffed. “As if!”
“No really!” the redhead insisted.
“Well he’s not showing it very well then.”
“Is that so?” Willow teased, “Then why is he looking out from his window right at this moment.”
Immediately Buffy’s head turned 180 degrees as she stared up at the window where William’s study resided and indeed he was looking at their direction and as soon as he saw her he quickly let go of the curtain hiding his presence in the process. “Well that’s something…”
“I told you he likes you…” Willow insisted on like a high school girl insisting on the newest gossip she had heard.
“He probably was just checking up on Prue…” she reasoned and Willow gave her a ‘really?’ look saying, “Is he checking up on Prue? Or is he checking up on YOU?” Buffy just shrugged her shoulders in response as if she didn’t give a care as she went over to the pile of leaves and picked Prue up ready to get her cleaned up. ‘If he really does like me, maybe I can use that to my advantage’ she plotted in her mind as she went into the house and got themselves ready for dinner.
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“Change that. And for God’s sake tell Peaches to stop calling me!” William reminded Faith as he swung the door into the dinning room.
“Now is that the right language to be saying in front of your child?” Joyce chided as she placed the cooked dishes on the table.
“Good evening!” was Buffy’s welcome beside Prue who was sitting on her high chair that was positioned just beside the head of the table.
“I’ll leave you people be. Enjoy dinner!” Joyce exited the room through the kitchen followed by some of her helpers.
William was astonished to see them or rather anybody since he usually always takes his dinner on his own. “Do you need anything Ms. Summers?”
“No.” Buffy complied as she fed Prue a spoonful of porridge.
“What are you doing here then?” William asked as he sat on the head of the table and started to help himself to the food in front of him.
“Me and Prue just thought we would join you for dinner.” She answered simply as she sat on the chair right beside Prue. “You don’t mind, do you?”
William just shook his head as he took a drink out of his glass of water. Time pass as neither said a word.
“Will you be busy tomorrow?” Buffy asked and broke he silence that had befallen the room for the last ten minutes or so.
“Come again?” William looked up from his plate to see Prue playing with her spoon making the carrots and potatoes mushier than they already are as she tried to get the spoon reach her mouth but fail miserably and try again. That’s something amazing about kids he thought. They are so innocent that they don’t know what’s failure they keep on trying until there is none. They never give up.
“I asked if you were to do anything tomorrow?” William answered her with a question asking why it was to be any of her business. “I thought you could join Prue and me at the party.”
William looked at her with a mixture of impatience and exasperation, “You really are that stubborn aren’t you?” he shook his head. “What word of no, never and leave me out of it don’t you understand? Should I ask Willow to get you the dictionary maybe?”
“I was just trying to ask.”
“And ask you do over and over again!” He ran his hand through his hair as he got up from his seat and threw his napkin on the table. “The answer is no… and that’s not going to change.” Hearing this, Buffy found him out of the room with the door swinging behind him. She had a feeling that his ‘never’ was not just for tomorrow but for something all together too.
To be continued...
Chapter 4
“Which do you like better the pink or the purple?” Buffy held up the two tiny dresses in her hand. The whole weekend she had tried again and again to persuade William to join them at Conner’s birthday party. But he too repeatedly declined not stating any kind of explanation or alibi for his refusal. That’s didn’t stopped Buffy though for she constantly followed him and continued to ask him the same question saying it in as many ways as she can. “Would you be coming with us?” “Prue would love it if you would come.” “Angel called asking for you to come.” “Ms. Joyce said that you should go.” but she got the same answer every single time. “NO!”
Finally last night she gave up and retreated from his study with a huff, not forgetting to leave one of her witty retorts, ‘You’re not just declining an invitation you’re losing your daughter in the process too.” hoping that somehow it might swing him a little as she shut the door behind her.
Prue cooded in reply. “I like the pink one better too.” She said as she hung the purple furry dress back on the closet and started to get Prudence dressed. There was a knock at the door, “Yeah…” she called as she fit the dress down her tiny legs.
Willow peeked her head in, “Mr. Giles is here. He said he’s ready whenever you are.”
“Thanks, Will.” She replied as she went over to the dresser leaving Prue in the playpen. “What do you think, should I braid her hair or what?” she walked back with a handful of clips and pins in her hand.
Willow entered the threshold and walked over to where they were. “I think braiding her hair the band style would look really adorable” she offered her opinion. Buffy nodded her head and began the task at hand. “So I assume the persuading didn’t go very well.”
“That guy is one hard nut to crack!” she commented as she twisted Prue’s hair into a braid. “He’s soooo grrr! I don’t know, something!” Willow was curious why her cousin was so keen on bringing William along with her and Prue but that thought was put to rest when she asked “How do you put up with him?”
“It’s an art really… they should have it on the Olympics next time” she mentioned out loud. Buffy just nodded her head giving her a small smile as she dismissed her thoughts. “But he’s really nice once you get to know him.”
“Yeah right!” she exclaimed as she finished her job and started to grab Prue and her stuff and headed for the stairs as Willow went in another direction saying she’s got to finish some folding. ‘Like he’ll change’
“Hey!” she heard someone call from the opposite side of the hall, as a figure came jogging towards their direction she continued her decent down the steps Prue in one arm. “Aren’t you gonna wait for me?”
“I thought you weren’t coming?” Buffy asked as they descended the stairs William beside her.
“Well, Cordy called this morning asking me to come… for Conner of course.” He shrugged his shoulders, “what can I say, I can’t refuse a lady…” he trailed off as he took the steps two at a time surprisingly in a good mood.
“But the whole week—am I not –“ Buffy trailed off as she followed him out the door. “Is your Daddy weird or what?” she asked Prue but she just stuffed her head in her neck as Buffy shook her head.
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“Okay kiddies, let’s have our lunch. I’m sure your little tummies are growling right now” she said with a smile. “When we’re done the magic show will be up next!” the host announced as the guest dispersed themselves into their own tables.
‘Now he’s feeding her…’
“What?” William asked at Buffy’s stare.
“Huh?” she said quite disoriented, “nothing…” she replied as she tried to keep her eyes from lingering. Buffy felt surprised because for some miracle that particular day William was being extra affectionate to his daughter. He had carried the baby around as soon as they passed the threshold of the O’Conner’s Manor as if showing off to that world that he’s the proudest father. Buffy considered that maybe it was just from the lack of sleep or from what she had mentioned last night but the back of her mind whispered something else… that something was up.
After their meal that consisted of nothing but the most delicious gourmet food money can buy, what rich people can afford, the magician who seemed to have ate way too much on the count of he was turning green, literally, was up on stage ready to perform. He invited the children to take the front row center chairs to be able to get the full view, the children scurried themselves in their chairs. William had angled his seat to face the stage as he sat Prue on his lap bouncing her there in the process as she too did the same.
With each performance, the children ‘oohhed…’, ‘aahhhed’ and clapped their little hands vigorously as Lorne, as the magician called himself, successfully completed each act. “Okay, now kids this will be the last act.” The children groaned at that. “But,” he added, “this will be the best performance yet” which caught the attention of the kids who were staring right at him. “But first I’ll be needing a volunteer from the audience.” He looked at the crowed scanning the guest around him. The children raised their hands wanting to partake in the act. “No, no children.” He shook his head, “this time I’ll be needing a volunteer from the grown ups!” he said as he continued to scan the crowed and came a stop, a smile forming on his lips. With that all the children including the adults looked at the direction he was staring at. “You!” he called with much enthusiasm as if he had found the holy grail. “Billy Idol wanna be.”
All eyes were on William as he pointed at himself as if asking ‘me?’ and Lorne answered him, “Yes, you, sweetcheeks! Come on right up!”
William shook his head in refusal, all eyes were on him including Angel’s which he threw a devious look at, ‘Peaches probably set it up, that ponce!’ and Buffy who had a smile on her face, a smile he couldn’t quite decipher the meaning of. Lorne was coming down on him ready to pull him up the stage. “Come on! Help a fella out… for the kiddies.” He said as he extended his hand as an invitation or simply a way to pull him up the stage if he refuses.
William darted a look at Buffy’d direction which Lorne misinterpreted, “Would it be better if the misses came?” he said as he pulled Buffy to her feet. Her eyes went as big as saucers at the thought of her going up the stage and doing god knows what! “Come on now!” Before neither could complain about the green magician’s remark they were already being pushed up the stage as the audience clapped their hands encouraging them while the two blondes look at each other with sheer embarrassment. Prue was still on William’s arm as they stood atop the stage the whole crowd looking at them with amusement.
“I’ll take her…” Angel offered to release William of Prue. Utter delight over his friend’s discomfort seen right through him.
“Okay,” Lorne turned his focus back to his audience, “Our next and final act would be the disappearing act. And here to help me is my lovely assistant, Fred come on out!” he introduced as a fairly dress lady came out from the right pushing a big black box with her positioning it at the middle of the stage. “Now the lovely Fred would be assisting our couple inside the box…” he trialed off as Fred asked the two blondes to get inside the box and whispered, “It’s gonna get a bit dark… don’t panic.” Then with that she let go of the curtain as Lorne continued talking to the children.
“Oh how original, the double curtain act!” William commented quite smugly.
“Tough it out, Big bad!” she dubbed him as she gave him an amusing smile.
Soon Buffy felt the walls moving as if it were closing in on her. She never told anybody that she was claustrophobic, actually she herself didn’t know until recently. It was when she was doing her practicum in one of the hospitals she was working on. It was fine really until they let her get some towels at the supply closet which was no problem until the door got stuck. She called for help and her co-worker said he’d be right back then the lights went off for some bizarre reason and she suddenly felt like the walls were moving in on her. Until then even elevator rides scared her, though she could take them she always preferred to stay away for she also got stuck in one before.
And now her situation is really making her feel uneasy as she tried to collect herself. Instinctively closing her eyes from fear and holding on to something is what she always does or to shout, but that’s not really an option right now, and this time it was William hand she held on to as her body shook slightly from fear. “Oh my god…” she breathed as the grip on William’s hand tightened.
He didn’t know what got into him but he had this urge to comfort the woman beside him, maybe it the old English man in him. “Hey it’s okay…” he placed his hand over hers and gently drew circles at the back of her hand to ease her tension. He had no idea why the woman’s hand beside him was shaking but he really didn’t give it much thought as he continued to soothe her.
“Oh god… oh god…” Buffy continued to mutter under her breath as they heard Lorne show the audience the empty box.
“Scared are we, luv?” William asked in a teasing manner which caused Buffy to notice their conjoined hands and quickly pulled hers away. Soon they heard Lorne say to the audience that they were gonna bring them back as Buffy recited a mantra of curse under her breath until she felt William’s hand clasping over hers giving her a reassuring squeeze.
The drum rolled as Fred opened the curtain and two blonde could be seen holding each other’s hand as the audience clapped.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
“Isn’t it just sweet!” Buffy commented as she helped Joyce cook again the morning breakfast. Prudence was still asleep so she thought she’d help around the house since she was already up. “You hardly see a guy do such a thing… and from him nonetheless!” She got plates out of the cup board and placed coffee on a Styrofoam cup. “I mean not that I liked it…” she backtracked. “It’s just well, it was surprising. That’s all…” she said with a smile.
“Well you should have seen him before…” Joyce shook her head in resentment as she spread some butter across the toast. “A year ago from now maybe, he was so full of life, so full of spirit.” She placed the toast on one of the plates. “You would have loved to meet him. It just takes time… he’ll come around…”
Before Buffy could give a reply, the doors of the kitchen swung open William on the other side a smile, rarely seen, on his face. “Good morning ladies!” he said quite cheery as he took his cup from Buffy not forgetting to give her a wink when he did.
Buffy’s cheeks went pink as she answered his gesture with a smile.
“You seem to be in a good mood today, Will dear.” Joyce said as she handed him a plate of toast much like a mother forcing his son to eat his breakfast.
“Not really… just feeling extra chirpy that’s all!” and with that he was out the door as Rupert drove out of the driveway.
“See, he’s coming around already!” Joyce said as she picked up the untouched plate of toast and shook her head.
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“Yeah… I want you to get right on to that okay. No more slacking off.” He warned onto one of his employees. Since he’d been gone for the last couple of months he noticed a downfall in production. What people do when they know their boss wouldn’t be looking over their shoulders. Good thing Angel came in from time to time making sure things are still in order or else he wouldn’t know what could have happen; which could have added up on his in-laws insistent dislike of him. Now with Drusilla gone he didn’t know if they were to be placing more pressure on him or just leave him be. He hoped it was the latter but knowing his in-laws he doubted it.
As he ended his call he spun on his chair. “Angel…” he acknowledged his lawyer and somewhat best friend’s presence as the brunette stride into his office with much confidence.
“Hey, how’s our big star dad doing huh?” Angel sneered as he swung his legs over William’s desk. “Good thing you came to the party, put in a good face and all.” He poked at some of his pens and played with the pendulum, seemingly ever so comfortable. “Saw you making it good with the nanny… Betty was it?” he told him as he raised his eyebrow at him and came over to the large window behind William and stared out into the city.
“It’s Buffy…and I wasn’t “making it good” as you put it.” He answered.
‘Keep telling yourself that…’ “Anyway, it does not matter… I say that the in-laws bought it hook line and sinker” William simply shook his head in dismay and closed his eyes briefly for his comment. But tough times call for tough measures, you got to what you got to do. “Now, I was thinking…”
“No more!” William stopped him before he can even relay his plan. “That was enough.”
“Just hear me out-“
“No!” he looked at him with resolve but he too carried the same expression. As William felt himself slowly crumble, he wondered if the prize at the end of the tunnel was worth this whole sham.
To be continued...
Snow flakes fell upon the window pane signaling the season’s festivities. Houses were being lit up every night with Christmas trimmings, buying trees and making snow mans outside ones house. From the luxuriant neighborhood, there was one house that stood out from the crowd though, but not because of its lavish decorations but rather the lack of it.
“Why don’t we decorate?” Buffy asked out of the blue staring out of the window from breakfast nook at their cottage watching the snow flakes fall. She hasn’t been around the neighborhood much, except for when she would go with Prue from the park and back but she noticed their household’s distinction from the rest of the homes at Culsber Hills.
Going to the park with Prudence was something she didn’t get away with easily. When she thought that she and William were in even ground, she decided to ask permission but he down right declined. That definitely caught her off guard but through persuasion and much more persuasion he did agree with a hell a lot of terms. She heard of overprotective fathers but this was insane.
“Well,” Willow replied as she came out holding two mugs of hot chocolate. “You can if you want to.” She suggested as she sat across Buffy. “You can begin with this little cottage, maybe place a tree there.” She pointed to the space the side table occupied beside the couch. “A wreath on the door, lights on the windows… Oh! And stockings! On the- well we don’t have a chimney. But we can make one out of cardboard!” the redhead trialed off.
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“Ohhh… Shiny!” Buffy was between the mass of boxes up in the attic sifting through them deciding on which things were useful enough for her to salvage. Joyce had told her that morning that she might be able to find some used Christmas trimmings up in the attic when she mentioned her predicament. She said that pretty much everything that even had a slight memory of their employer’s wife was kept up there and that included everything that had anything to do with the upcoming season for she had always been the one who decorated the house with the outmost gladness. She even held parties every Christmas Eve and it wasn’t just any other party, it was an occasion that had the whole street talking.
That in mind, Buffy had big hope that her task might be easier than she thought. Later during Prue’s afternoon nap she snuck out of the room and proceeded upstairs. But once she opened the door to the attic, that previous thought was soon out the door. For what was right in front of her were mounts over mounts of boxes and chest drawers not to include a couple of boxes marked ‘clothes’ ‘Spike’ and some that were left unlabeled. The first thought that went through her mind were, ‘rich people sure do have a lot of junk’.
Satisfied with the one box she had filled with strings of Christmas lights, red and green banners, some wreaths and a couple of hand made ornaments she decided to bring them down now before they get too heavy for her to carry. Lifting the box she almost fell over with its weight but managed slightly as she maneuvered herself around the other boxes stocked up in the middle of the room. The load she was carrying was so full that she could hardly see the path she was walking on thus she tripped and fell flat on her face the contents of her package spilled onto the floor. “Shoot!” Buffy cursed as she straightened herself and looked back to the object that had caused her fall. Hanged over one of the boxes was a… leather coat, Buffy presumed as she looked closely at the material. As she stuffed the clothing back into its box to avoid later accidents she saw that the box was labeled ‘Spike’. ‘Who the hell is Spike?’ she thought but dismissed it anyway as she tried to place all the stuff that had fallen from her box right back into it.
Filling the container up to the brim she saw a notebook lying on the floor that must have fell out of one of the boxes with her fall. Instead of just placing it back. Her curiosity got the better part of her as Buffy opened the notebook up and learned that it was a diary.
September 29, 1997
Today we moved into a new house on Culsber Hills. The house was incredibly beautiful but of course I already expected that. Spike said that this would serve as one of his gifts for me for our upcoming first year anniversary. He had been working extra hard since we got married and it really troubled me whether he have lost interest but seeing and being inside this house-mansion right now, I know that this was what he was working for. He strived for me. He wanted to prove to my parents that he could take care of me unlike what they had assumed. Spike had been proving them wrong and it’s all for me. He is indeed the best husband anybody could ask for. I would never regret the decision I made in the altar that blessed day.
Attach with the entry was a picture of a man and a woman in front of the house they are living in right now except it seemed different. The woman was pure beauty with white skin and her hair the complete opposite of it. She was cuddled in the arms of a man, who Buffy assumed was her husband ‘Spike’. He was in complete black attire with black boots and she noticed the leather coat she had tripped upon earlier as the same coat the man in the picture was wearing. From what she could see he seemed to have slicked back bleach blonde hair with a boyish grin on his face. To Buffy he looked a hell like her employer Mr. Bennedict yet seemed totally different at the same time too.
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“Deck the halls with boughs of holly. Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.
'Tis the season to be jolly. Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.
Don we now our gay apparel Fa-la-la, la-“ Buffy was cut short of her singing
when somebody surprised her beneath the stairs causing her almost to fall yet
again. “Oh!” she breathed out, “that was close.” She said to herself then
half-shouted to the person, “What the hell is wrong with you…” she voice died
down as she saw who was in front of her blocking her way. Instead of
explaining herself she just walked right pass him and proceeded down the hall
and down the other flight of steps.
“Ms. Summers?” William called after her as he followed her. Finally catching up with her, he inquired, “What were you doing up in the attic?”
Buffy faced him briefly then continued down the stairs as she answered his question. “I was just looking for some Christmas decorations to adore this house. I found quite a lot. I’ll probably be done by today, then I can start putting them up tomorrow. I already asked for the help of Mr. Giles and Ms. Joyce.” she said her reply with outmost ease as if it were the most normal thing for her to do. “Speaking of that, can I please have some cash?” Buffy reached the last of the step and placed her box down on the floor. “I was thinking of buying a pine tree and putting it over here,” she pointed to the blank spot between the two flights of stairs. “I found a lot of ornaments up in the attic that I’m sure with a little bit of cleaning they would look great around here.” Buffy said with a grin, eager for her plan to be put into action.
Silence fell before the bomb drop. “No.” William answered dead on.
“And why is it?” Buffy asked sounding not much like an employee talking with her employer.
“Because.” He answered as he began to make his way into the study.
“Because?” Buffy followed his track, just to have the door shut right up her face. Buffy stopped short the door barely missing her face. With a huff she barged through the door. “Why must you always opposed to everything I want?”
William looked up from his desk an inquiring look on his face, but Buffy answered his look with a straight face. “I wouldn’t have to oppose if you don’t wish to do of what I don’t approve.” He answered her matter-of-factly.
“But what I do is harmless,” she argued.
“Then it won’t matter whether it happens or not…” he said not really as a question but as a mean of ending their conversation. But Buffy didn’t see it that way as she tried to argue yet again. But before she could get a word in, “that’s the end of discussion, Ms. Summers. I suggest you go upstairs and check up on Prue. I think she’s up from her afternoon nap. You can go now.” He said as he looked back down on his desk.
Seeing no hope in the situation right at the moment, Buffy turned back and went out the door heart brokenbut mind set into convincing William to change his.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
December 12, 1997
In just a matter of 13 days before me and Spike’s first Christmas here in our new home. I had gone to the mall today and bought thousands of Christmas trimmings that I think would look divine hanged on the tree that Mr. Giles had picked out. I decided to buy a real tree this year. I always loved the smell of fresh pine. Who cares if I have to sweep the floor every minute the smell of pine just makes Christmas more Christmas-y! I wish Spike would like the way I would set it all up I can’t wait for his reaction once I’m finished!
“What is wrong with him!” Buffy came barging into the kitchen doors swinging as Joyce calmly looked in her direction then continued preparing dinner. She sat down on the kitchen island with a huff, “Not because he’s miserable means that everybody should be too. Christmas is the one thing people are supposed to look forward too. My favorite holiday nonetheless…” she pouted for a second or so then sat up, “And he’s not gonna mess it up for me or anybody else!” she said out loud, striding out of the room, as if determined to win the war to stop the apocalypse.
“That’s good,” Joyce said to the empty air as she stirred silently by the stove.
To be continued...
December 24, 1997
I went Christmas shopping today and I gotta say the mall is packed with people. I guess no matter how early they start the Christmas sales and all that people still fall for the last minute Christmas rush. As I was walking around the mall I came to pass upon a baby store. They had the most adorable Christmas decorations out of all the stores I have seen. On their window display was a little carriage and inside was a mannequin baby in a red sweater matching the two taller mannequins beside it clearly to be assumed as the parents. As the image lure me closer, I saw a couple pushing a stroller with a little baby girl inside, come out of the door. As they strode off, I can’t help but feel my heart sink. I know that the one thing that Spike wants is a baby. Something I think I could never give him, at least for now. For months we have been trying but nothing happens. He always assured me that it was okay, that our baby will come in the right time but I know deep down inside he was always disappointed with me. I wish I could give him the one thing he yearned for… his little Christmas wish.
“Are we done with the shopping then?” Joyce asked as she entered the kitchen and went over to the cupboard looking for something.
Buffy was by the quarters’ table wrapping the gifts she had bought the day earlier. One would wonder who she would really need to buy gifts for. She was new here in England and hardly knew anybody but she wanted to give Joyce, Mr. Giles and of course Willow something for Christmas, as they say Christmas is the time for giving. They have been the mall for over four hours before the two had actually started to buy something.
“So what do you think of this one?” Willow held up a red sweater modeling against her body as she looked into the mirror. She and Buffy had decided to take the day off to finally start and hopefully finish on the much a due Christmas shopping.
From the racks Buffy was looking through, she looked over at Willow direction and walked over behind her. “I don’t think reindeers look very good on you, cuz.” She patted the redheads shoulder as Willow gave out a huff and returned it on the rack finally giving up and exiting the shop.
“So, have you heard from Lakeside yet about that job?”
“Uh-huh,” she nodded, “They called me the other day and I got in!” Buffy said excitedly, “They wanted an answer in a couple of weeks. As if I needed time to think really. I mean I’d take it in a jiff! But of course I didn’t tell them that… don’t want them to think I’m too eager.” Buffy said pretty proud of herself for her self-control, before she would have jumped up and down and thank the person on the phone a thousand times. But that was the old Buffy, the new Buffy is much more serious, she’s in the ‘real world’ now. And if that meant being professional and all that crap then she’ll do it.
“Well… good for you, Buff. I’m happy for you” Willow congratulated her cousin. “The perfect Christmas gift from Santa huh.” Buffy put on a bright smile as she continued strolling around the stores, finally the job she had been waiting for right in front of her. On to being the head nurse and maybe study medicine? ‘Nah…’ her mind joined in.
As they continued their stroll, “I think we should take a seat Buff, cause I swear I think my foot is gonna fall off…” Willow trailed off but Buffy wasn’t paying attention as she stopped deadlocked on something on the store’s window display and let the redhead continue walking until she noticed nobody was at her side and turned back to see cousin staring into the window of the shop as if hypnotized. She could almost actually imagine Buffy looking at the window as if it was the gates to heaven as she followed her into the shop.
“Buffy?” Joyce inquired as she stood before the blonde waving her hand from side to side, which cause Buffy to be pulled away from her reverie.
“Yeah,” Buffy shook her head for good measure as she turned back to the task she was performing. “Me and Willow had a great time, can’t wait for tomorrow!”
“That’s good then. At least some people around this house are excited about the holidays.” Joyce whispered to herself as she grabbed the tray of tea and started for the door.
“Who’s that for?” Buffy inquired as she placed the last of the tape and placed the present she had wrapped in the box beside her.
“The O’Conner’s are in the study, I thought I’ll bring them tea.”
“Oh, why don’t I do that,” Buffy offered as she stood from her place, “you need to get started on dinner soon anyway.” she took the tray from Joyce with a smile.
“Oh my…” Buffy heard Joyce exclaim as she made her wait out the door. “Time sure flies fast.” And couldn’t help but give out a giggle.
As she walked over to the study, she passed by the main hall and noticed how much the house looked livelier with the lights and the little ornaments they have put up around the house. It had taken a lot to persuade William to agree with her to put up the decorations but she did it. Somehow he always seemed to go along with her at the very last second, as if he was making her go through all the trouble of persuasion just to fool around with her to know how far she would take it.
“Oh please! Those things are always a sham” Buffy could hear William’s voice from down the hall as she made her way to the study. They seemed to be arguing about a benefit or something. As per usual her good spirited employer refused to go and his ever so insistent attorney had to come over and persuade him. That’s what Buffy had witnessed the whole time she was here. Angel would come in, talk about a whole bunch of crap to drag William into benefits and auctions and all that whatnot rich people go to. She still does not understand why the hell he really had to show up, it’s not as if William was the light of the party, in her opinion he’d just make things more boring than they already were.
“They expect you to be there!” Angel argued on as Buffy set the tray on the table and saw Mrs. O’Conner on the couch seemingly getting more annoyed by the minute with the two men shouting.
As Buffy exited the room she was followed by a much relived woman who was right on her tail. “Those can really get it on can’t they?” She shook her head as if trying to get the ringing out of her ears. “You’re Buffy right?” and the blonde nodded. “Can we maybe go somewhere… I don’t really feel like going in there again and risking my eardrums exploding.”
Buffy giggled as she led Cordelia upstairs into Prudence’s room.
“I really like what you did with the house,” Cordelia absently commented as they walked down the hallway.
“Thanks!”
When they entered the room, they saw Prue on the crib sleeping soundly with a smile on her face. “You know, I love it whenever Conner does that… they just look the cutest when they smile sleeping don’t they…” Cordelia whispered as she brushed slightly the hair that had fallen over Prue’s eyes.
“Yes they do.” Buffy looked over at Prue a second longer than necessary then went over to switch on the night lamp. The sun was going to set soon and she wouldn’t want Prue waking up to a dark empty room. Switching the monitor on, the two silently retreated from the room leaving an adorable little angel sleeping. “I guess you better get back, they might have torn each other’s head off by now.” Buffy suggested as she ushered the brunette over to the study where they could almost hear the two voices at the end of the hall.
“I said no and that’s final, Angel. You can’t force me into it this time.” William answered as he turned away from Angel looking through the window.
Cordelia came over to Angel’s side and placed her hands on her husband’s bicep as a means of asking him to leave William be. “Okay.” Angel answered though a bit hesitant, “Well see you tomorrow Christmas dinner?” But William didn’t even flinch as Angel and Cordelia retreated the room saying their goodbyes.
Buffy found it awkward to be standing in the room after all the tension that had just happened. Trying to avoid being noticed by William she carefully went over to the coffee table and grabbed the tray of untouched tea.
“I had the right to refuse right?” William asked to no one in particular not moving from his earlier position. “He knows how this occasion meant to her…”
Buffy just stood there mid pick-up deciding on whether to answer the question or just leave saying nothing. But she didn’t have to think of that soon for William turned into her direction asking the same question yet again.
“I-“ Buffy bit her lip as she set the tray back down.
“He never understood!” William ran his hands through his hair as he walked over to the mantel above the fireplace where the portrait of Dru still stood. “I blame myself… I blame myself Buffy!”
Buffy stood behind him dumbfounded. Aside from the fact that this was the first time he called her by her given name, she didn’t know what to do, should she go and tell him he shouldn’t blame himself and that it was no one’s fault when she didn’t actually know what happened. Should she try to go over to him to give him some comfort or should she just stay put and know her place.
“It was because of me and my stupid leisure pursuits I couldn’t settle down. A simple request and I had to argue with her! Damn myself!”
“I told you to sell that bike, Spike! How many times do I have to say, it’s a dangerous vehicle! Do you really want your daughter to grow up without a father!”
Spike was driving with Drusilla on the passenger seat as they made their way to the annual auction the Collingsworth’s held. “Dru, I can’t sell the thing. I’ve had that bike since I was in high school you know that…”
“Yes. But now you have a family!”
“I don’t’ ride it anymore! What’s the problem anyway! It’s just gathering up dust in the garage!”
“Oh don’t you dare lie to me William! I know you rode it in the race track just last week.”
“Now where did you get that silly idea from, pet?” Spike answered trying to concentrate on the road.
“Angel.”
“That ponce!” Spike said to himself gripping the steering wheel.
“It’s a good thing he did. Or else I wouldn’t have know.” Dru looked over at his direction trying to make him take her seriously. “William please you have got to stop doing that…”
“It’s just a past time, luv. Nothing serious is gonna happen to me.” He searched for her hand and squeezed it gently as he assured her. “I promise.” He kissed the back of her hand.
“That what you say now! But how about if something did! What will I do then Spike?”
Spike cracked his jaw from frustration and he let go his wife’s hand as he concentrated back on the road. “Nothing’s gonna happen to me, pet!”
“You don’t-“ Drusilla was cut off as she clutched her abdomen and closed her eyes from a sudden burning sensation she felt.
“Believe in me, Dru! I have been doing this for years!” Spike’s voice got louder with each reason he stated concealing his wife’s wallow for pain. “I have never been injured before. I play with professional clean players only. And you know I would never be reckless for you know I wouldn’t be able to grasp it if something happened to either you or Pru-“ He looked over to the passenger seat to find his wife hunched over the seat sweating from pain. “Dru?” He soothed her back panicking inside as he tried to concentrate on the road.
Drusilla leaned back on the chair eyes closed from pain continuing to clutch her abdomen. Soon Spike saw the pool of blood on her wife’s skirt trailing down her legs as he stepped on the gas.
He had told her everything and she had no idea what to do. Buffy still stood behind William awe stricken. He blamed himself for his wife’s death when clearly it had nothing to do with him. “Why?”
“What?”
“Why was there blood?” It was probably the most stupid thing to say right now but she didn’t know what else to utter, that was the first thing that came out of her mouth.
“Something about soddin blood clotting or something. But it doesn’t matter…” He breathed in hard trying to fight back tears that were ready to fall.
Buffy suddenly found her legs moving on their own as she closed in on him. “It’s not your fault…” Finally they were face to face as William looked up tears straining his cheeks. “It’s not your fault…” she repeated as she caressed his cheek and wiped his tears away. “It’s not your fault…” as their foreheads met.
“I’m sorry to have woken you up this early Mr. Giles.” Buffy said as she sat by the passenger seat as Mr. Giles drove down the road.
“Oh it’s okay… For whom is this sudden Christmas last minute shopping for anyway… at three o’clock in the morning.” Giles couldn’t help but smile at the girl’s extraordinariness.
“For someone who deserves a proper Christmas.”
December 25, 2003
Merry Christmas! Today I woke up receiving the best news ever. Me and Spike were awoken by the insistent ringing of our bedroom phone. I was of course too tired to get up from bed and waited for a good minute and about a fifteen ringing before Spike actually was awaken and answered the phone with a groggy voice. After hearing what the caller had to say he handed the phone to me then buried his face back on the pillow.
“Hello” I greeted as the doctor told met the news and to my surprise I was speechless, I couldn’t say a single word. I probably looked weird staring off into space without saying anything because Spike took the phone from me and asked what was wrong. I think I looked at him as if dumbfounded because he got up from bed and looked at me with the most concerned look his blue eyes could do.
“Something wrong , luv?” I shook my head. “What is it then?” I looked at him in the eye with a gleeful smile on my face.
“We’re gonna have a baby!” and the look on his face was priceless!
The same “Buffy I think you better come down soon. I think the old man’s knees are just about to give in.” Willow laughed.Buffy was on top of Giles shoulders as she finished the finishing touches.
“Make fun of the old man why don’t you.” Giles retorted.
“Okay. Done.” Buffy announced as she jumped own from Giles. Noticing the exchange of banter the two were getting on, “Willow, why don’t you start the lights up huh?”
Willow gave out a pout but did the request nonetheless. As she plugged the socket in, the tree lighted the room up like stars on a dark night as they twinkled on. The pine tree in the middle of the main hallway was so high that it almost reached the ceiling of the second floor. It was wrapped around with lights and stings of popcorn with some beautifully placed ornaments. One that Buffy especially found in the attic about the entry she found on the diary the other day an ornament that symbolized the couples first year on Culsber Hills.
“It’s beautiful, Buff” Willow said walking into the room as she stood beside Buffy staring up into the tree.
“I agree, Buffy. You have definitely done an excellent job…”
“I did a pretty good job, didn’t I?” Buffy said quite proud of herself. The three stood there in awe for a couple of seconds. Before Willow finally gave up and decided that she needed some shut eye.
"Good idea, Willow. I think we all need that. Merry Christmas everyone." Giles said as they all retreated back to their own quarters.
To be continued...
Chapter 7
December 25, 2003
That was the predicament that morning and boy was Spike excited. After he got over the shock, he leaped out from bed, literally shouting "We're gonna have a baby!" down and hall and came back to bed hugging and kissing me like a mad lunatic! Not that I minded.
Later that night after the family Christmas dinner we had where Spike proudly announced to his family that I was pregnant, he led me to the den where we sat in front of the fire cuddling and simply enjoying each other's company. Out of nowhere he suddenly pulled out from his pocket a single black velvet box. As I opened it I saw the most adorable little Christmas ornament. It was made up of two white turtle doves with beaks meeting as if kissing and in the middle was a baby turtle dove sitting looking up at the two older doves. And of course I melted. He said he couldn't possibly resist it when he saw it on the shop window earlier that day. Isn't he just the sweetest! As I hang the ornament on the Christmas tree, I realized that Spike did get his little Christmas wish.
"Can you please pass the butter?" Joyce asked from her seat at the table. It was Christmas morning and the household staff at the Bennedicts' mansion decided to celebrate the holidays by eating breakfast at the atrium. The snow was falling from the sky; small snowflakes were landing on people's windows. The weather outside was perfect for a day out, make snowmen, snow angels and a good ole snow ball fight. "So, what are your plans for the day?" she asked as she bit down on her bread.
"Well... we-"
"Good morning everyone!" Buffy came into the room with Prue on her right arm, "Merry Christmas!" As each said their greetings Buffy took a seat on the empty spot between Willow and Joyce. "So, how’s everyone doing this morning?" She sat Prue on the high chair that stood beside her.
"I was thinking maybe we have a little bit of snow related fun!"
"I'm gonna prepare for a little Christmas Dinner..."
"Opening presents!"
"Games?"
"Oh! Can we make smores? I looove smores!"
"Good morning." William came into the room with his usual coat and tie, a briefcase in one hand as he went over to the counter to get his morning dose of caffeine.
"Merry Christmas, Mr. Bennedict!" Buffy greeted and he just answered her with a nod.
"Joyce." he called, "where's my coffee?"
Joyce rose from her seat, "I thought maybe you'd want eggnog today... or maybe hot chocolate..."
"With little marshmallows!" Willow added as he held her cup up to see.
"No. Coffee would do just fine."
"What?!" Willow exclaimed clearly shocked, William looked at her with a raised brow which caused her to lower her voice, "I mean... you used to love hot chocolate...not that you couldn't change what you like..." Willow trialed off a she realized that she was babbling.
William just smiled in amusement, "I'd just have the coffee."
As Joyce prepared the pot of coffee Buffy stood from her seat asking, "You're going to work?" William gave her a duh look. "But it's Christmas..."
"Does the sun stop shinning on Christmas? Do people stop breathing on Christmas? Do-"
"Okay...! I get the point."
"By the way," he took a sip from his coffee, "I need to talk with you for a second." Buffy stood there waiting, "Outside..." Buffy grabbed the spoon Prue was playing with before she followed William out the door.
"What's this?" He pointed to the big pine tree that Buffy got that morning. She had been lucky enough that a store was even open that early. She and Mr. Giles had been driving around for almost an hour until they came to spot a lone man in front of his door having a few drinks with his buddy clearly to celebrate the holidays. She had asked if they had had any trees left, the man had none then Buffy asked if by any chance he knew a place where she could find one. His buddies had laughed at her saying it was impossible to find an open store this early in the morning let alone find a lone tree this time of the year especially on Christmas day itself. A kind man named Riley Finn had pulled her aside saying an apology for his friends’ reaction saying that it was because they have had a quite to drink. He asked why a pretty lady like her would be needing a tree this late of the season and night. Buffy had told him her reasons about William and Prue and how she thought this might help them both. Hearing this, Riley said that he might have a spare tree out back that he was suppose to reserve for his own home but seeing as Buffy needed it more he would gladly give it to her. At first Buffy was hesitant but Riley insisted thus she took it handling him the cash to pay for the tree but Riley declined saying that it was on the house with that he went back to his buddies as Buffy and Giles dragged the big pine tree back home.
"A Christmas tree."
"Yes I can see that. What is it doing here?"
"For decoration..." Buffy answered as if it was the most logical thing which it probably was.
Silence fell as William observed the thing giving it a once over. "I like it." Buffy smiled feeling proud of herself. "I want it out." Buffy's mouth formed an 'O' shaped, "I want it out by tonight"
"Why?"
"You're really pushing it aren't you Ms. Summers?"
"But its Christmas." she reasoned.
"I know, you think I don't know what a bloody calendar is?"
'So much for thinking I got through one of his barriers last night.' The other night Buffy thought they had shared something intimate. She had comforted him and stayed with him as long as she didn't even know. He had told her about Dru's death and how until this moment he still blamed himself for it. He had admitted that he had changed and it was not because of his mourning for his lost wife but rather maybe... Buffy had said that it could have been fear and he neither agreed nor disagreed with her. They had spent the night talking about that and useless stuff, and to Buffy's surprise they had gotten along well, something she never thought was even possible. "Until tonight...?" Buffy tried to negotiate.
"Now." Buffy couldn't do anything but give out a huff.
"Come'on Prue.... you can do it... Crawl over to Buffy..." Willow cheered the little child on. They had played around in the snow that morning, Prudence wearing the cutest little set of fur coat and mittens she got from Buffy for Christmas. They had made snow mans, snow angels and even threw a couple of snowballs Giles way which was always fun.
"Ata girl!" Giles cheered her as Prue reached Buffy and she swept her up her arms and bounced her in the air.
After breakfast the group went under the big pine tree by the stairs to start opening some presents. William had asked Buffy to take down the tree before tonight, everyone thought that it was such a waste since they had just set it up that morning and they knew how much hard work Buffy had put into the thing. But the blonde just shrugged it of smiling as if it didn't mean anything which made Willow worry a bit about her cousin.
Joyce had received a sweater from Willow, a handbag from Giles and an apron from Buffy which read 'Iron Chef'. Giles got a hat, a tie to match one of his many tweed coats and one of those gloves for driving. Willow got the reindeer sweater from Buffy, a knitted hat from Joyce and a pair of socks from Giles. When it was Buffy's turn to open her present, Joyce handed her a small box.
"Here, I thought it might help you during you long hours at Lakeside." Inside was a canister full of small packs of instant coffee. Joyce couldn't help but give out a smile. "No, really. Here's the real one." she handed her a small figurine. It was a house on top a hill which read Culstber, "A little something to remember us by." Buffy couldn't help but smile and gave her thanks to her and the others.
After everyone have had a chance to open and give thanks for their presents, they all decided to go outside and have some fun in the snow before lunch. Buffy declined to go with them saying she had to take down the tree first before their 'Boss' gets home and have one of his fits. They all agreed and so Giles and Willow went out with Prue as Joyce got into preparing lunch. Buffy looked up at the tree right in front of her, this was probably the most beautiful thing she had created...'oh well' she thought as they pulled out the ornaments out one by one.
Later as the group was playing a game of charades in the living room, William came home from work. "Okay... sounds like... food? meat? steak?" Buffy nodded vigorously, then placed her hand on her heart then stabbed herself acting dead, "stake!" Willow then did the victory dance just as William passed by amusement seen on his face as he watched them play on.
"Okay, so that's 13 points for me and Willow and 3 points for Joyce and Giles." Buffy recapped the score. She then saw Willow slow down with her dance and looked awkwardly behind her. She then swiftly turned her head, "oh... it's you..."
William's eyebrow rose, "Well, it's so nice to hear that you anticipate my arrival, pet." Buffy just rolled her eyes as she gave him a half-hearted smile.
"Do you wanna join us, Mr. Bennedict?" Willow offered.
"No thank you," he declined, "I'll be in the library if you need me..." with that William retreated back to the library. On the way over he passed by the stairs and saw that the tree had been taken down already, the only trace that the tree was even there were the boxes scattered beneath the stairs. He had come home from the office exhausted, not that he really did anything. Actually the office wasn't really open today. What sane person would make Christmas as a work day? The only reason he didn’t want to stay inside the house was because it reminded him way too much of Dru.
No matter how high he put up his guard against the people around him, no matter how reserved and confident he may seem it still remains that he's sensitive about certain things and Christmas just being one of them. This Christmas everything just seemed to remind him of Dru, every little detail, the atmosphere, the weather, the fashion even the scent of the air especially fresh pine reminded him of her. And it's just torture especially since he still blamed himself for her death. Everyone told him, Buffy last night too, that he shouldn't blame himself cause it was never his fault but for him maybe.. just maybe he could have stopped it, that was something that will forever be at the back of his mind.
He opened the door to the study with a huff as he walked over to the mantle where Dru's picture resided. He ran his fingers across the glass frame, "Why did you leave me, Dru?" he whispered into the air as he clutched the frame in his chest and the tears started to fall.
'Knock, knock' William heard a sound coming from the door. He quickly wiped his tears with the back of his hand as he placed the picture back on the mantel, "Come in."
Buffy peek her head into the door, "Mr. Bennedict?" she asked uncertain as William sat down on his chair behind the big oak table. He ushered her to come in further through the threshold. "We were wondering if maybe you would consider joining us downstairs for a simple Christmas dinner Ms. Joyce had cooked up. It looks really delicious."
William answered her with a smile, "No thank you. But you all go and have fun, I'm sure it would be a feast."
"Okay..." Buffy nodded, "Prue's been looking for you....?"
"She's a baby Ms. Summers... she can't differentiate me from Giles or any other male she sees."
"Really?" Buffy challenged him, "Then how come she had recognized you as her Dada before?" Buffy used the exact words Prue had used.
William just followed her with his gaze as she retreated out the study. "Ms. Summers?" He asked when he noticed a black velvet box on top of his table. "What's this?"
"Oh....that…" William waited for her to explain further as silence fell. “Open it…” With that William opened the box and saw something he didn’t really want to see or remember right now. “Do you know what it is?”
William looked up and met her eye, “Of course I bloody know what it is… where did you get it?”
I found it on one of the boxes… and there was an engraving at the back…”
“And what do you expect to achieve with this, Ms. Summers?” He asked with a raised brow as he raised the white ornament with his hand. It was the three white turtle dove figurine he had given Dru last Christmas, at the back there was an engraving ‘thank you, for the best Christmas present ever -Spike’. How could Buffy have possibly known that this had meant something other than a single token of appreciation.
“I expect you to spend time with your daughter, sir… to give her a second of you precious time, especially this Christmas.” She stated confidently though inside she was shaking, but really what has she got to lose, she was going to quit this job sooner or later anyway, what harm can it really do?
William shook his head, not because of resentment or disagreement but rather because he didn’t really know how to answer her question.
“It’s not too late, William.” She told him as she neared his desk. "making youself and her suffer is not gonna do any of you any good. It's not your fault, William..."
"I can't... she re-"
"Reminds you of Dru?" he didn't flinch so Buffy took that as a yes. "It's not her fault, she didn't wish for any of this... what she needs is a father..." Silence fell as neither said anything and William sank down on his chair head on his hands.
“It’s not that easy….”
“I know, but you have to start somewhere." she tried to meet his eye but he refused to look up, "William.... Spike?... Dru would have wanted you to." He looked up at the mention of his wife's name. "She's in her room." William nodded his head as he followed Buffy up the stairs and into Prudence's room.
Prue was in her room, silently playing with a stuff pig in her playpen, when Buffy and William entered she seized to have heard anything as she continued on playing. William stopped above her looking at her innocently play as if there was nothing else in the world except her and her toys... and he realized that he wanted to part of that world. He wanted Prue to grow up knowing she had a father who didn't just finance her existence in this world but loved her too. He wanted to be part of her life for she was already part of his whether he wanted to or not, she was his daughter and it's gonna remain that way whatever happens and as he said before, he can't possibly grasp life without them, he had already lost the woman he loved the most he's not gonna lose his daughter too.
Minutes pass as he looked longingly at her, Prue picked that moment to look up and stare gazingly to her father. Her innocent brown eyes met his blue ones as she handed him a pink stuffed pig, "go-go" she said as she held her arms up, wanting him to carry her.
William smiled as he obliged with her request and picked her up in his arms, Prue instinctively wrapped her small arms around his neck and placed her head on his shoulder and he never felt so warmed inside, his little girl, his princess in his arms, he's such a moron to have waited this long... but it's better to be late than never. As he rocked her slowly back and forth he couldn't help but break out into song.
Hush, little baby, don't say a word.
Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird
And if that mockingbird don’t sing,
Daddy's gonna buy you a diamond ring
And if that diamond ring turns brass,
Daddy’s gonna get you a looking glass
And if that looking glass gets broke,
Daddy's gonna get you a Billy goat
Buffy looked at the picture before her and concluded that they looked adorable together like father and daughter and she had no doubt that William would make an excellent father, he had the singing done right already.
Hush oh hush the night birds call
Hush oh hush the dark must fall
And if that Billy goat don’t pull,
Mama's gonna get you a cart and bull
And if that cart and bull turn over
Mama’s gonna get you a dog named Rover
And if that dog named Rover don’t bark
Mama’s gonna get you a horse and cart
And if that horse and cart fall down
You'll still be the sweetest little baby in town
Buffy gazed at William as he continued to sing and she realized that aside from the obnoxious, rude, self-centered man he had shown her before there was another side to William a side she was beginning to like. He smiled at her when he saw her looking his way, a smile that wasn't just make-face, but a genuine one.
Hush oh hush the night birds call
Hush oh hush the dark must fall
Soon Prue slowly difted off into dream land in his arms, as he placed her back on her crib and tucked her in, he looked at Buffy's way. She was at the threshold of the door prepared to get some rest as she made her way down the hall. William run after her and caught her just before she reached the first step. He caught her mouth in a quick yet sensual kiss then whispered in her ear, "Thank you and goodnight, Ms. Summers." And with that he walked away.
Buffy caught off guard stood there for a good five seconds before replying, "It's Buffy!" she called down the hall making sure to keep her voice low as to not awoke the sleeping child in one of the rooms. "And you're welcome."
To be continued...