Catharsis

Spike had an odd sliver of warning run down his back as Adam fastened his gaze in his.

“You’re gonna help me?” he asked skeptically, and Adam inclined his head.

“I would like to make you a... part... of my scheme for improving mankind.”

“Uh-huh. Well, I think I’m filling my space prettily enough as it is. Got problems, issues just like the next man. And I’m growing fonder of them by the minute. Quick resolves will never work in the long run, I think.”

Adam had the hint of a smile on his mouth before he said:

“This will. I assure you. And once you’re down there, she won’t be able to resist coming, will she?”

Spike furrowed his brow.

“What’re you on about?”

¤

“Riley, please, listen to me,” Buffy tried to sound her very most rational, but he’d have none of it.

“We were part in creating that thing, Buffy,” he merely said, voice strained. “I was part in it. In killing Maggie... Adam’s going down. Don’t stand in our way.”

“It’s not your way! You’re in my territory, and so deep in it you can’t see the forest for all the trees, don’t you understand that! You can’t fight Adam with means he knows, he’ll fight right back and you’ll get killed. He was built by the Initiative; my gut tells me that he’ll anticipate those weapons of yours and that they’ll be no good.”

“Awaiting command,” the radio cracked to life.

“Hold,” Riley replied, eyeing Buffy for a stretched out minute. “Everything we do from here on out is a gamble. And I would never let you go in there alone; you know that, don’t you?”

“I won’t be alone,” she shook her head.

“For all we know, Spike’s already dead.”

He noted the flare of fear tearing across her face, and felt his heart sink slightly.

“You say you can’t fight Adam with means he knows,” he said. “He’s fought you, he knows you; he’ll kill you this time.”

He reached for his radio and Buffy shook her head a little in silent protest.

¤

“Calor!”

He was shaken so violently it didn’t take him long to wake up.

“How can you be sleeping!” Ath exclaimed. “Quickly. Move!”

He got up, tearing clothes on as he watched her pale face. He had rarely seen her lose composure like this, she was the calm one; but now she seemed about ready to come apart.

“What is it?” he asked.

She looked even more disbelieving.

“Search for the vampire,” she then told him.

He frowned, doing as she asked and soon he had unknown scenery before his minds eye. He stared at it; then he fastened his gaze in his sister’s once more.

“Repercussions,” he murmured.

“He is not going to die,” she stated, running out through the bedroom door and down the stairs, Calor on her heel.

She threw open the front door and stumbled into Jonathan’s arms.

“John!” she exclaimed, more than taken aback.

“Are you alright?” he asked; worry creeping into his features at her disheveled appearance.

“Go on,” Ath told Calor, who immediately began to run across the lawn and onto the street, quickly disappearing from view. “Jonathan,” she said, keeping the panic at bay and fastening her gaze in his. “I can’t do this anymore.”

He looked uncomprehending.

“I know it’s late, but at least I didn’t wake you...”

“No, not that... I can’t do this anymore,” she repeated, feeling how her insides were ripping at the expression on his face.

“What-what do you mean?”

“I’m leaving, Jonathan.”

“Sunnydale?”

The shock was glistening in his eyes and she hated herself, hated that she had to break his heart after he had healed hers. But he hadn’t been supposed to meet her. She wasn’t supposed to be a supporting part of his memory. So she had to wreck it. Wreck everything. She just hadn’t thought she’d had to so soon.

“I-I don’t understand,” he murmured. “I thought...”

He trailed off and she bit back her tears fiercely, holding her hands back from touching him. Telling herself this was what she had to do, and she had known it all along. She had known this was what it would come to. But as she broke him, she felt she was breaking herself, and it was difficult to bear.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I never meant to make you think anything. I mean, it was fun, right?”

“So last night...? It didn’t mean anything?”

He was getting angry now, and she wished she could grant him the release of taking his fury out on her, his hurt, release some of the pain she was causing him; but she was in a hurry.

“How can you treat someone like... like...?”

She smiled derisively, then gave him a peck on the cheek before simply turning and proceeding across the lawn.

“Walk away, that’s mature!” he called. She reached the curb and then he yelled, almost pleadingly: “Just tell me why!”

“Because I have to,” she murmured under her breath, not looking back.

¤

Spike felt apprehension blaring in the back of his head.

Get out, it said. Get out now.

He started backing away as casually as he could.

“I appreciate the offer, mate, really do, but I can’t take it.”

“I’m afraid this is one you can’t refuse,” Adam replied, his gaze drifting to the side and before Spike had time to think more than ‘bloo-’ two pairs of arms grabbed either of his, holding him in a tight grip. “I have no doubt your parts will help build some of my strongest warriors. Might even use you for my brother.” Adam smiled slightly. “You will assist in the destruction of the Slayer after all. Don’t you simply love irony?

Spike fought to get loose. Adam’s smile merely widened.

“Did you think I didn’t know from the second I came to you that you were involved with her? I am no fool! But you did your task, and perfectly so. I wasn’t sure you would. I didn’t know how stupid you truly were. You’ve sealed her fate, vampire. Her nobility for her friends will sink her in the end. Her bravery in the face of adversity. And when I put the knife to you, I’ll make sure she knows of it. She’ll come for you.”

Spike’s mind was racing. Looking at Adam he began to register the different parts he was made out of, how they were sewn together, and everything slowed. Adam noticed the change on him, waiting for him to speak.

“Warriors?” he finally said. “You’re making...”

“An army,” Adam nodded. “Yes. I was a project, I know. A project of war. A necessity to see if the demon world could be combined with the human. As you can see, it could. But not as mother had predicted. I have my own will. I will make my own world.”

“You’re thoroughly insane,” Spike stated.

“On the contrary. I’m halfway there.”

Spike felt the grip of his right arm begin to relax slightly. He kept his eyes in Adam’s, bringing forth a patience he didn’t know he possessed, knowing that he had to wait for the right moment.

It’s gonna work, he told himself. Whenever a villain is babbling this much about their bloody plans, the captive always escapes.

“You think you’re halfway there, maybe. But you can’t put an army together in a cave in the middle of the bleeding woods. You need equipment, manpower, and where the hell will you get the parts for...”

He trailed off, eyes growing.

He could see the Initiative cages filled with demons, and everything became clear.

Buffy.

She needed to know.

He decided the moment was right, and tore loose. His left arm was restricted no more than three seconds longer than his right, but it was enough and he felt a large hand grab his neck before throwing him across the cave, making him hit the cave wall with a huff.

“Careful,” Adam’s voice sounded as Spike shook his head to clear it, raising it with effort as the demon leaned over him. “You could get hurt.”

Spike glared at him, but this time Adam anticipated his movement and as he tried to use all his skill to get up and get lost, the demon grabbed him by the throat and held fast. Spike’s hands went to the other’s wrist, trying to pry his fingers away, but there was no use.

“You’re nowhere close to a necessity,” Adam stated coldly. “So I would play my cards with extreme care.”

Spike’s gaze grew as chilly as the other’s.

“Go back to hell,” he practically growled.

Adam merely tilted his head a little to the side.

¤

“Prepare to move forward,” Riley spoke into the radio.

“You don’t know what you’re doing,” Buffy said.

“Red Leader takes the eastern route, Green Leader takes the north. Over and out.”

“Copy that, Team Leader. We’re moving now.”

“Riley,” Buffy said.

Suddenly Ath materialized out of thin air right next to the Slayer, who jumped two feet in the air.

“Holy crap!” she exclaimed.

But Ath’s gaze was focused on the cave. Buffy stared at her, and then felt a surge of fright as she took in her friend’s expression.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

Ath didn’t reply.

Soldiers were soundlessly making their way towards the cave from either side of its opening, ducking down as they neared it. Buffy was about to say something to Riley, when there was the sound of someone bursting through the undergrowth, the branches behind Riley moving to the side, permitting Calor to come into sight. He blinked as he saw his sister already there, stopping at her side.

“I ran,” he said.

“I teleported,” she replied.

He furrowed his brow.

“I didn’t know we could do that.”

“Almost time to leave,” she answered simply.

Buffy was looking from one to the other. She was about to open her mouth and ask what this was supposed to mean exactly, but Ath narrowed her eyes, the concentration on her face making Buffy’s words pile themselves on top of each other in her throat.

¤

Adam’s hold was hardening mercilessly. Spike began to realize – this was it.

He was waiting for his life to flash before his eyes, but the only image appearing was Buffy. Smiling and happy. Warm and soft.

God, he really would miss her.

¤

Outside the cave it seemed as though the very air was stilling. Buffy staring at Ath, unable to look away.

Then the goddess softly said:

“No.”

The next second Buffy felt like she was in an elevator as it came to a dragged out stop at the bottom floor, a moment later it was as though she was floating an inch above ground, the feeling of descent not wanting to land in her feet. As she looked up she saw a leaf drifting through the air as if the wind carrying it had been put in slow motion. Three other followed it. The soldiers were practically standing still.

“What is...?” Riley began, but Calor silenced him with a look.

Buffy felt confused and yet focused. Splintered into a billion pieces, and yet completely poised. Racked with apprehension, and still full of sudden faith.

Ath looked at her, smiling a small smile. Buffy had a surge of expectancy break through everything else. Ath locked her gaze with her brother’s. He gave a nod and she moved forward, walking confidently across the clearing taking her to the cave, the leaves slowly scattering to the sides. The soldier’s eyes were unseeing when Ath stepped passed them. She brought the branches aside and disappeared out of sight

Buffy was about to walk in her footsteps, but Calor stopped her by putting one hand on her shoulder. She turned her head to him.

“He’s in trouble, isn’t he?” she asked, the words feeling funny on her tongue, and Calor looked regretful.

She felt something frosty capsule her heart as she moved her eyes back the way Ath had gone.

“What did she do?” she asked no one in particular; not expecting a response; not getting one.

Calor’s hand began to weigh heavily on her shoulder and she was about to push it off, feeling as though it was about to drive her straight into the earth, when she was slung forward. She thought she would fall, everything going black even before she hit the ground, but then she saw the inside of a cave stretch out before her and realized she hadn’t been pushed. Calor’s hand was still on her shoulder.

He was letting her see through his eyes.

Her heart grew very quiet as she took in Adam and Spike’s position just to her right. Her brain didn’t seem to be able to process thought anymore, just impulse. The first being to intervene, but she was unable to, her feet seemingly rooted to the dirt floor of the cave.

She could see Spike’s grip on Adam’s wrist hardening, meaning Adam’s surely was as well.

Soon it’ll be too late, she thought frantically.

Suddenly she was somewhere else, with Calor. A place unlike any she had ever seen. She was standing aside, watching him. He looked different, yet the same. He seemed disgruntled. Ath came up to stand by his side. They were talking about something. Buffy strained her ears to hear. The switch only lasted a fraction of a second, and before she could grasp it she was pulled from it, back into the cave as Ath entered it.

But then Calor’s hand relieved its pressure and the next instant she was outside, back in her own mind and staring at the stillness of the paused reality before her.

“Please,” she whispered, taking a small step forward.

¤

There was no hesitation in the goddess as she walked right up to Spike and Adam, frozen in the position that would have lead to the disengagement of Spike’s head from his body. Ath moved one hand through the air and released Adam’s grip. She fastened her eyes on Spike, and he was freed from the state he had been in. She reached out and supported him as he looked around, disoriented.

“You’ll feel better in a moment,” she assured. “Come with me.”

¤

Buffy thought her eyes were about to break into pieces. They were aching, and she couldn’t figure out why. She had goose-bumps all over her arms and shoulders. She was shivering.

When the branches moved aside it felt as though she had been standing in that spot for a lifetime. And when Ath appeared, one arm around Spike’s waist, she finally released the breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. Seeing the well-known form of the vampire sent a sudden thrill of relief through her, making the ice around her heart splitter and fall away. She blinked and understood why her eyes had been hurting, the glaze of tears resting there making her sight blurry as they began to retract.

She didn’t notice how Riley was quietly observing her.

Ath and Spike joined them, and Buffy met his gaze. He had bruises around his neck. Buffy stepped up to him, placing one arm around his waist as well, supporting him without saying a word. Ath let her grip go, moving to stand beside Calor.

“You okay?” Buffy asked Spike, voice low.

He nodded, showing her he meant it as he carefully pushed away to stand on his own. He had his balance back. His eyes never left Buffy’s face.

A wind came scuttling through the group and Buffy looked at Ath before glancing over at the clearing, where the soldiers were once more moving briskly forward. The Slayer turned to Riley, now her expression was demanding.

“They’ll get hurt. Possibly slaughtered. Call it off. Now. We’ll find a better way to do this.”

He looked at her, then over at Spike before moving his gaze to his men.

“Team Leader to Red Leader,” he said. “Abort.”

“Repeat.”

“Abort. Meet back at the House.”

“Copy that. Aborting mission. Over and out.”

The soldiers made themselves practically invisible as they immediately melted into the surrounding forest.

“I would like to ask the three of you to leave,” Riley said to Ath, Calor and Spike, though he barely looked at the last mentioned, fastening his gaze back in his girlfriend’s. “I need to speak with Buffy.”

“Of course,” Ath mumbled.

She and Calor turned and began to walk away, Buffy saying:

“Ath...” The goddess looked back at her, and the Slayer added: “Thank you.”

Spike eyed Riley, then had his gaze rest in Buffy’s, and at the look on her face he merely gave a nod before leaving as well.

Buffy let her eyes find Riley’s. His countenance had softened. She didn’t know what to say to him. He spoke first.

“I think I fell in love with you the moment I saw you...” She knew instantly where this was headed. “My ears were still ringing from the book hitting me in the scalp, but I think the dizziness was something else... And I know you still have feelings for me.”

“I do.”

She did. And she didn’t know if it was a sensation of slow liberation in her chest, or sorrow, or perhaps both.

He smiled sadly.

“But,” he then said. “But I can sense you drifting now, every time I see you. I really didn’t want to acknowledge it at first. And when I had to, you told me it wasn’t what I thought. But it’s like half of you is gone someplace else. I wanted to be that half, only me wanting it isn’t enough.”

“I didn’t mean to...”

“I know,” he interrupted her. “I know you didn’t mean to. I believe you believed every word you’ve calmed me with over the passed few weeks. You do want what we have... It’s just that you want it with him. If he had been human...”

He trailed off and her face was slowly traced by regret.

“I’m sorry,” she finally said.

“I’ve been offered a spot with a group leaving Sunnydale. We fly out on the first of June. I’m going to accept it.”

“Riley...”

“I can’t stay here,” he said, another small smile on his lips. “Adam will be my last target.” He paused. “I hope you’ll tell me if you need my help,” he finally finished.

“Same goes for you,” she remarked, smiling a little as well.

Then she stepped up to him, hugging him tight.

And so it was ended, just like that. But she knew if he hadn’t brought it up, she would have.

“If he ever hurts you,” he said now, “I’m coming back. Tell him that.”

Her smile widened as they pulled apart.

“I’ll tell him,” she promised.

¤

Spike removed his duster, throwing it haphazardly into a corner as he entered the crypt. His neck was aching, but he discarded the emotion for the more pressing one of anxiety. More precisely, anxious waiting. She had to come. She would. She’d come. He didn’t care that he’d been one pinch away from certain demise. He didn’t care that by some miracle deed Ath had saved his life. He needed Buffy there. He needed to have her close again. He felt like he was driving himself mad, thinking about how she felt beneath his hands. If he’d never have that again he might as well have perished. She had to...

The door opened and she came through it. She stopped when her eyes landed in his.

She was breathing heavily, her cheeks flushed from the run. She had never looked lovelier.

“Thought you’d be here,” she said.

Her pulse was beating violently at her brow, in her throat. He observed her, the need for words leaving her. Before she quite knew how, she’d taken the steps dividing them and his arms were around her. She wrapped hers around his neck, a sob rising in her throat.

He closed his eyes, hushing her gently.

“God, I’m dumb,” she murmured, pulling back and looking up at him. Then a smile split her face. “I’m so stupid.”

“I promise you,” he said gently, relishing the feel of her in his arms, carefully moving a lock of her hair from her brow as he finished: “I’ll never say it to your face.”

Soon enough a laugh broke through from her and he felt every single lingering trace of tension disappear from him. She was there. She had come. And she wasn’t going to leave.

No, she wasn’t going to leave. She felt as though she had set herself free. No more cages, no more imprisoning fears and restraining convictions. What she felt was right, or she wouldn’t feel it this strongly. She was so good at walking in circles around herself, chasing shadows when she should look straight into the light. No more of that. But all of him. All of him.

She kissed him then. As she had before. Slowly, deliberately. Vanishing into him. And for the first time allowing herself the sweet pleasure of doing it fully.

His touch was tender as he began to undress her. His lips leaving her mouth, tracing their way down her neck and to her shoulder. She closed her eyes.

He lifted her and she clung to him, wrapping her legs around his waist as their lips met again. She groaned silently as he entered her. They wound up in the armchair, then on the couch, and finally downstairs. Sinking down on the bed they joined again, Buffy’s body by now gleaming with sweat, her mouth carrying a smile. She had never felt this good.

Spike smirked at her expression, letting his tongue trail its way down to her left breast.

This must be what people write songs about, Buffy mused pleasantly, her fingers digging their way into his short strands.

Then she giggled, making him roll onto his back before kissing him deeply.

And poetry, she thought as his tongue danced with hers, his hands exploring her with all the knowledge of her they already possessed. And stories, she added. God, I’ll never have enough of him. I’ll never get enough.

And their movements intensified, their peaks reached together, their fingers interlocked and their eyes resting in the others as they slowly descended into each other.

Five hours later she was watching him sleep. His mouth was so soft, how could it host something as sharp as his fangs, how could it crave blood and death? No, it didn’t. Not anymore. It craved her.

She smiled at the thought.

His eyes were closed, but she could still see them before her, as though they were watching her with that well-known warmth. Splendid and clear in what they saw in her.

She touched the scar of his left eyebrow, retracting her hand slowly.

How much of his history was still to be learned? There was nothing but a tingle of excitement at that thought, because it brought with it an image of a long future with him, of nights talking, and making love, and having him as near as he was now.

Moving closer she nudged the tip of his nose with hers before placing a gentle kiss on the middle of his forehead.

“I really do love you,” she whispered.

His eyes opened and she drew a slight breath in surprise, then she held his gaze, waiting for his reaction. He looked at her for a long time. Then he reached up a hand and pulled her face near, kissing her deeply. She slid close, moving to lie on top of him. When they finally broke apart he rested his eyes in hers.

“Told you,” he then said with a mischievous glitter in his blues and she smirked, boxing him on the arm before she giggled.

¤

“You still scared?” he asked softly.

It was something like an hour later, though she couldn’t be entirely sure. She was comfortably ledged between his side and his right arm, her head on his shoulder.

“No,” she answered his question. Then she smiled. “Maybe a little.”

He smiled as well.

“I’m not,” he stated. “I never was.”

“Liar,” she teased.

“I think I might get to be, though,” he murmured and she turned her head to look up at him. “If you were taken away...”

“You gonna get mushy on me now?”

“I love you,” he said simply. “I’d be damned if I lost you.”

She smiled at that, pulling herself up and kissing him gently.

What had stood in the way of this? Why had she put up such a battle with her heart? It seemed so easy now, translucent in its simplicity of how well it was going to work out. There would be no heart ache, no pain. Just this warmth and swelling contentment. To look at someone she loved, to have him look at her, and know that what she felt would always be reflected in his eyes, it was a blessing. The best thing in the world. She breathed in his scent.

“You smell so good,” she murmured. “How can you smoke so much and still smell so good?”

He smirked, raising his shoulders in a shrug.

“I didn’t realize how much I missed you,” she said, looking at him again.

“Funny, isn’t it, how the old noggin’ works?”

He stroked away her hair tenderly. She smiled.

“Truly. Funny.”

He smiled as well, embracing her tightly.

“I’ll never let you go,” he murmured.

Her smile widened.

“I know,” she whispered.

¤

Riley entered the cave. He knew nothing but the almost primal need to go there. Rounding an out-shooting rock formation his eyes met Adam’s. Adam smiled.

“I have been waiting for you,” he said.

“And now I’m here,” Riley replied.

Divine Intervention

She woke up an hour later, feeling well rested for the first time in weeks. It was a contradiction in itself, but it only served to place the smile back on her mouth. He was holding her, and she curled up to him. She knew they’d have to get up. Last night she hadn’t even considered the fact that Adam might stop by, looking for his escapee, but now it occurred to her with its glinting obviousness. And then there was the telling, of what had happened, to the Gang. What had happened with Adam, that was, not with Spike. Her smile broadened and she shimmied up so that she could look at his face. She truly felt happier than she had in a long time. But right now they were in the midst of... or more on the brink of war, and they had to face that before they could do anything else.

She realized she was already thinking of them as a they.

Then his eyes opened, meeting hers, and her smile settled, feeling as though it was never going away. They lay watching each other in silence for the longest time before they finally slid to an edge of the bed each. They stood, eyes catching and both of their smiles growing. They climbed the ladder, beginning to dress. It was slow, every now and then their gazes locking again.

He felt like a lovesick sixteen year old who’s made love for the very first time... Looking at her he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to take his eyes off her. To have her look at him the way she was... He didn’t want her to stop. He felt elated, like he could go out and conquer the world because it was there for him, for them. His smile widened self-consciously. He felt like a fool, but he trusted her with all his heart. She loved him. And she wouldn’t hurt him. It was a fresh start, this was. For both of them.

She pulled her sweater over her head as he buckled his belt and they faced each other.

Morning was chasing golden beams through the air of the crypt, none of which hit the vampire, of course. In this light she was radiant. Then again he knew that she could be half-drenched and covered in mud and he’d still think her the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.

His smile turned to a smirk, and hers grew.

“What?” she asked.

He merely shook his head.

“Adam’s probably looking for you,” she said.

He suddenly realized he hadn’t told her what he’d found out the night prior.

“Are you going to see your entourage?” he asked and she smiled a half smile before she nodded. “We’re taking the tunnels, then. I’m coming with you.”

They climbed back down the ladder and she followed him as he showed the way.

“He won’t be coming for me,” Spike stated with assurance. “I’m not that important. Bloody hell, for all I know what he told me was something you’re meant to hear.”

“What did he tell you? What are you talking about?”

“He played me like a sodding fiddle’s what he did, the bugger.”

They arrived close to Giles’ apartment and burst into the open, both of them running at top speed until they reached the shadows of the courtyard. Buffy made Spike stop before the door, having him look at her.

“You almost died. Well, more,” she said. “Whatever he’s done before, last night he meant business. Otherwise Ath wouldn’t ‘ve...”

She trailed off and he furrowed his brow.

“Ath wouldn’t have what?”

“I’m just saying, don’t count on knowing what Adam’s really up to from here on out. All bets seem to be off.”

Spike smiled suddenly.

“Wouldn’t count on that, love,” he stated, knocking hard on the door. “And by the way,” he added, pulling her close by the waist, catching her lips with his and kissing her deeply.

She returned it, trying to keep the rising heat at bay, not being very successful at it. They could both hear Giles clamber down the stairs. Just as he was about to open the door they broke apart, facing it and looking innocent as lambs.

“Buffy?” Giles said, baffled. “It’s seven-thirty in the bloody morning, what’re...” He noticed Spike. “... you doing here,” he finished, Spike smiling sweetly.

“Can we come in? Much obliged, Rupert, truly,” he said quickly, stepping passed the mortal and entering the apartment.

Buffy followed him and Giles closed the door, looking profoundly innerved.

“This can’t be good,” he muttered.

“Actually it is,” Spike stated, turning around to face them both. “Well, maybe not in the we’re-about-to-stand-as-sodding-victors-bring-out-the-bleeding-champagne sort of way, but still good.”

“It’s much too early for this,” Giles said with a begging look at the Slayer.

“Just listen,” she encouraged, curious to hear this herself.

Spike went through a detailed recount of everything Adam had told him the night before. It didn’t take long before Buffy had called Willow, Xander and Riley.

Spike wasn’t sure why, but he didn’t care that the soldier boy was coming. He looked at Buffy and felt at peace. And when her gaze met his, at first searching for a negative reaction, and when not finding one warming immediately, it made a deep sense of satisfaction settle within him.

She wasn’t sure how to break the news to her friends. What to tell Giles. How to tell her mother that she was dating a vampire again... Of course, Joyce didn’t seem that apposed to Spike, did she? She hadn’t been able to shut up about some piece at the gallery that Spike had actually witnessed in use somewhere in some remote mountain village in some godforsaken country far, far away. Buffy smiled at the memory. God, she couldn’t stop smiling. Not even when she was about to strategize what would most likely lead to their plan of attack, could she get the grin off her face. She noticed Spike had the same problem and felt herself grow a few degrees hotter, her cheeks burning. She smirked, turning away from Giles.

She had a sudden thought and decided to make one more phone call.

¤

Ath answered.

“Can you come to Giles’?” Buffy’s voice asked. “It’s urgent.”

Ath blinked.

“Of course,” she said. “We’ll be there right away.”

She hung up and looked over at her brother.

“You ready for this?” she asked.

¤

There was a knock on the door and Buffy rose, opening it her gaze met Ath’s.

“I thought you could teleport,” the Slayer said.

“It’s rude to do it into someone’s home,” Ath remarked silently.

Buffy smiled a little.

“Please, come in. It’ll probably be a little while before the other’s get here. There’s something I’d like to ask you.”

Calor followed his sister. He wasn’t sure he was ready. But last night he had felt he simply had to show Buffy who they were. And what he had done. Last night he had been able to let her feel what he had felt when he performed the spell. Perhaps it would give her the opportunity to at least try to understand, and perhaps even forgive.

“Why didn’t you tell me right away who you were?” Buffy asked once they were standing face to face in the living room.

Giles came in from the kitchen, Spike raising his head where he was sitting in an armchair.

“We couldn’t,” Calor replied. “It isn’t allowed.”

“Allowed?” Buffy asked. “And tampering with someone’s life...? Is that allowed?”

Calor held her gaze steadily.

“No,” he answered. “It’s why we were sent here. To try and contain the damage. Rectify what I had set in motion by getting mixed up in your fate. I hadn’t realized it would alter so much.”

“But last night you let me know who you are anyway. What’s the punishment for that?”

“I had to show you... I had to tell you. Our time has almost run out. I couldn’t leave without letting you know, so that someday you may understand how deep my regret goes. When Ath felt forced to intervene, I knew part of our secret would spill into the open. I wanted to offer you me.”

“I trusted you,” she said.

“Because you can trust us,” Ath stated. “Because you are linked to us through bonds stronger than time and age. Your soul is part of our destiny, as we watch over it.”

“And doing a fine job of it,” Buffy grumbled.

“I wanted you to see the beauty of your gift,” Calor said, “and not just the burden which comes with it.”

“What are you talking about?” Spike asked, rising.

“They’re the Powers that Be, or two of them,” Buffy answered. “And, also, part-time genies,” she added.

Spike stared at Ath.

“Shimmer,” he murmured, Ath’s mouth curling into a small smile. “It all makes sense, then,” he said.

“Yes, we’re puppets for them to play with, and no matter what we do, one of them can come along and decide to undo it,” Buffy said bitterly.

“That’s not true,” Calor shook his head. “What I did I will pay dearly for. It was a grave mistake, one which broke many rules. I am not going home as what I once was – simply a guardian with too much belief of knowing what was right and what was wrong. I’m going back there with traces of this humanity inside me. And I will remember it always. The fight that goes on within you. The decisions you have to make. Ultimately I see the pattern of life clearer than you, but I should never look down on you for it. Your decisions are your own. Free will is that of man, after all. Buffy, I am so sorry for what I put you through. I hope that you will someday be able to believe me.”

She looked at him for a long moment, then stepped close and wrapped her arms around him.

“I don’t know why I’m more grateful than I am pissed,” she said and he had to smile as he hugged her back. “I feel like you’ve given me something. Something I would only have had for a very short time otherwise...” she added slowly.

She wasn’t sure where the words had originated from, but as she spoke them, she knew they were true. Why they were true was another question. Calor simply held her a little tighter before they broke apart.

“When will you have to leave?” Buffy asked.

“Tonight,” Ath said.

“Did you bring any cookies, by any chance?” the Slayer wondered and Ath smirked.

“You didn’t ask me to,” she replied.

Twenty minutes later Willow, Xander and Anya were at the apartment. Another ten and Riley arrived. Spike retold his story.

“I’m not sure how all the pieces fit, though,” Riley commented.

Willow opened her laptop, all of them gathering around her and a hush falling over them all.

“I can’t take the credit,” she said as the blueprints of the Initiative began flashing by on the screen. “It seemed to decipher itself.”

She gave Buffy a meaningful look.

“I know this like the back of my hand,” Riley stated, then frowned, looking closer. “Only, this,” he murmured, pointing to a particular part of the screen, “this isn’t supposed to be here. That’s weird.”

“No,” Buffy disagreed. “That’s Adam.”

The Slayer stepped back, getting all eyes on her.

“He sent me this because he needs me for the slaughter,” she said. “Once it’s done, I’ll have helped provide the body parts for his army, and hopefully I won’t make it out of there myself. Kill two problems with one equation.”

“So he’ll set the demons he’s been stockpiling loose, being sure that you’ll be down there to face off with him because... that’s what you do, and instead finding yourself in the middle of a virtual riot. You’ll slay as many demons as you can and then you’ll die,” Willow summed up. “He seems to have most angles covered. Except now you’re not going down there.”

“Yes, I am,” Buffy stated.

“What do you mean?” Xander asked. “Didn’t you hear about the riot and the demons and the death? There’s none of that if you stay above ground. All in favor?”

“No, he’ll expect me to do that. I need to go down there. I’m finishing this.”

“And how do you propose to do that?” Spike asked.

“By means he’s not familiar with,” Buffy answered simply, her gaze fastening in Ath’s.

“What means?” Giles asked.

“Adam’s not going to be blown to bits or set on fire or drowned or any of the regular ways we might think up... Riley, how would you suggest we kill him?”

“All I know is that his power source is located close to the spine,” Riley replied. “Everything points to it being uranium and placed somewhere where a human’s heart would be.”

“Nice,” Xander muttered.

“Personally I believe that our weapons have been a predicted attack and won’t do any good,” Riley added.

“Really?” Buffy asked. “Seemed you were all too eager to use them on him last night.”

“We weren’t going to use our weapons last night.”

“And what were you going to do?”

He was silent for a moment.

“Stun him. Capture him.”

“Stun him?” she repeated, disbelieving. “That must be one of the more stupid things I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth.”

“Well, last night I guess I wasn’t exactly thinking clearly,” he bit back and it silenced her.

The building tension was broken as Giles opened up a pad and clicked his pen.

“Let’s get to work then, shall we?” he said.

¤

And so they worked, tirelessly, all morning. Finding the ideal point of entry, with a lot of help from Riley. Buffy could feel his searching eyes on her from time to time, and she met them with forced calm. It wasn’t easy, because all she wanted to do was curl up in Spike’s lap. She had even been about to lean against him a few times when they were all sharing breakfast at the coffee table, but at the last minute had remembered that she shouldn’t. She could not, however, keep the smile down whenever her eyes met his. She wasn’t even considering that she might be going into the Initiative to ultimately die, the thought was too foreign. She was finally living, wasn’t she? It wouldn’t end so suddenly, there was no way.

By noon the plan was pretty much formulated.

Buffy stood at a window, looking out with unseeing eyes, going over all the twists and turns. They could do it, she knew they could.

“Hey,” Spike said behind her and she carefully let her back connect with his chest, knowing that the room beyond was concealed from her by him.

“Hey,” she mimicked him, feeling his hand gently slide down her left arm, his fingers finally locking loosely with hers.

She slowly turned around, looking up at him as she slipped one hand up his chest. She longed for him to hold her. Maybe they should just tell them all and be done with it. But then she thought of the pain she would inflict on Riley, though she suspected he had already suspected what their breakup actually had led up to. No, she still couldn’t do that to him. He deserved better than to have it rubbed in his face.

“I wish...” she began, Spike’s eyes growing in faked alarm and she smirked, checking herself. “Sorry,” she whispered, making him return her smile.

“I just remembered something,” he then said and she raised her eyebrows wonderingly. “Adam. He was talking about a brother. Do you know what he meant?”

Buffy looked at him for a moment, her brain working.

Riley?

“I might,” she said. “But... I don’t think it’s important.”

“Alright,” Spike said. “You all fired up, love?” he then asked and she nodded a little, though she wasn’t exactly thinking along the lines of battle. “Let’s do this, then,” he said and she nodded again, giving the fingers still entwined with hers a squeeze before letting go and stepping around him.

“Alright, people,” she said. “The hour is now.”

They headed for the front door, filing through it and continuing on in silence for a while. Buffy fell back to walk beside Ath.

“You won’t be zapped back home in the middle of this, will you?” the Slayer asked and Ath smiled.

“No,” she replied.

“Because I’m counting on you.”

“I know,” Ath nodded, glancing over at Willow she said: “She’s more powerful than she knows.”

Buffy looked over at her friend as well.

“I’ve always known that,” she said with a fond smile. “But you don’t really need her help, do you?”

Ath smirked at Buffy’s perception, then answered evasively with:

“You never know.”

And it was true. To have Willow not act as part of the mystical aspects of this battle seemed too big a gamble; Ath knew this was, no matter what happened, the road the amateur Wicca was destined to follow.

The goddess turned her gaze on Spike’s back, watching it for a short while before saying:

“Even in chaos there is reason.”

Buffy followed the way the other’s eyes were going and smiled to herself.

“I think I finally get what you meant when you said that even the most spotted light deserves a chance to fight the darkness. It was completely lost on me that day, but now I see it.”

Ath smiled warmly.

“What had happened if Calor hadn’t granted my wish?” the Slayer wondered silently. “Would Spike and I never have...? I mean, would he ever have loved me? Would I ever have loved him?”

Ath’s smile lingered, then she asked:

“What do you think?”

Buffy sighed at the lack of answer, then thought about it for a few moments, replying:

“I think we would have... I know we would have. But I’m pretty sure it’d have taken longer. Much, much longer.”

Ath’s smile curled into a smirk.

As said, perception.

“It doesn’t really matter now, does it?” she asked and Buffy shook her head slowly, still looking at Spike and he turned his head to meet her gaze. They smiled in unison and then he looked ahead again. Ath smiled at Buffy’s expression. “Calor did succeed after all, only not the way he thought he should have,” she commented, Buffy looking questioning. “Bringing your smile back,” the goddess elaborated. “I believe, in the end, it is all as it should be,” she added. “With you he will be a warrior for good, not evil. Your influence over him is greater than you can even imagine,” she finished. “You soothe his demon, because it loves you.”

¤

They came to the crossroads which meant it was time to split up. Buffy and Willow faced each other, embracing tightly.

“Be careful,” the Wicca said.

“That’s me, full of care,” Buffy assured with a smile.

“We’ll see you soon,” Xander assured, hugging Willow as well.

Giles smiled at her and she wrapped her arms around him, too.

And so Ath, Calor and Willow headed down Revello Drive, while Buffy, Spike, Xander, Riley and Giles all went the way leading to the college, and the Initiative, and Adam.

“Are you sure this will work?” Giles asked.

“You didn’t see what Ath did yesterday,” Buffy replied. “Her and Calor combined will be able to do what I need them to do, I know it. And with Willow there too... There’s no failing,” she finished with a half smile at her Watcher.

“I’ll rally the troops,” Riley said, touching her arm gently before he ran on ahead.

“Do they actually talk like that?” Spike asked to her left and she smirked, looking up at him.

¤

Riley fought to keep his hand away from the radio transmitter, but it was useless. Picking it up he said:

“She’s three minutes from the compound. She’ll be inside within five.”

“Excellent,” Adam said. “Drive her to the fourth bunker. I will meet you there.”

¤

Buffy met Riley at the steps of the fraternity. The place was deserted.

“They’ve gone down ahead of us, securing the cages so that the beasts won’t escape. We don’t know how much control Adam’s gained of the systems mainframe, so there may be little time. We have to hurry.”

“I’m a hurry kinda girl,” Buffy nodded as they stopped in front of the mirror which would reveal the elevator bringing them into the Initiative. “I work best under hurry,” she added, looking straight into her own eyes as the red scanner ran over her and Riley and the door slid open.

Giles, Xander and Spike came with them, the door closing and the descent beginning.

When the door slid open again, however, they were met by a fleet of guards. Riley seemed genially surprised.

“What’s this?” Buffy asked silently.

“I don’t know,” he shook his head.

Two minutes later they were all standing in front of a rightfully pissed colonel.

“You have some nerve, lady,” he stated, looking over at Riley with a darkening gaze. “And what say do you have in all this?”

“Adam’s here,” Buffy cut in. “In the Initiative.”

“Every inch of this constellation is under constant, twenty-four hour surveillance,” the colonel snapped.”

“Including the secret lab?” Xander asked innocently.

“Including everything,” the colonel replied sharply. He looked them all over threateningly, though hesitation was creeping over him as he fastened his gaze in Buffy’s. “What secret lab?” he then inquired.

“The one Adam’s clearly been using right under your noses,” she answered testily.

“I know everything that goes around here,” he stated. “A tick on a mouse couldn’t get passed without my knowing of it. And if Adam wants to try, we’re ready for him.”

“Jolly good,” Giles said, Buffy hearing the lack of patience in his voice. “And just how do you plan to get close enough to Adam to remove his power source?”

“Hit him simultaneously with multiple tazer blasters. Incapacitate him with as much voltage as we can muster.”

“Won’t work,” Riley said.

“Excuse me? Did I say you could speak, soldier?” the colonel demanded, Riley giving him a challenging look back.

“It won’t work,” Buffy repeated Riley’s words, stepping calmly between him and his infuriated commander.

“You tell me my business?” the colonel asked.

“This is not your business,” she said, “it’s mine. You, the Initiative, the boys at the Pentagon, you’re all in way over your heads, messing with primeval forces you have absolutely no comprehension of.”

“And you do?”

“I’m the Slayer. You’re playing on my turf.”

“Up there, maybe. But down here I’m the one who’s in control.”

With that, all the lights shut down; darkness swallowing the room swiftly.

“Damn,” Riley grumbled.

“He’s releasing them,” Buffy said, turning to look at Spike. “We have to move.”

“You’re not going anywhere,” the colonel stated brusquely.

“Hostiles are loose, sir,” a computer technician seated before a screen said. “The cages are malfunctioning.”

“No, they’re not,” Buffy said with a look at the colonel.

“You two, stay here, these people are under arrest and are not to leave this room,” he said to two of the men. “The rest of you come with me. We have to take the armoury.”

They disappeared.

Buffy exchanged a glance with Spike, then with Riley, and soon the two guards were taken down.

“This way,” Riley said.

They ran through the room, into a hallway. They could already hear the sounds of struggle and it didn’t take long before they proceeded straight into a raging battlefield where the unleashed demons and the staff and soldiers of the Initiative were fighting fiercely. Death was already spreading its menacing claws over the scene, snatching unfortunate souls from all around them as bodies dropped to the floor. Buffy wanted to get in the middle of it, but knew she would be playing right into Adam’s hands if she got mortally wounded now. Besides, she had the bigger fish to fry, and he was pretty much dangling from the hook as it was.

It didn’t take long before they were on the other side of the large room, the door leading to the secret lab having been blasted open. They filed through it quickly, Riley in the lead, Buffy, Giles, Xander and Spike not far after.

“In here,” Riley said and they entered a round room filled with different equipment.

There was an opening in one of the corners that didn’t look as though it belonged. Buffy looked at the door and could tell right away that it was usually concealed. She turned to Riley.

“How is he controlling you?” she asked.

Riley looked perplexed.

“What? Who’s controlling me?”

“I was hoping you wouldn’t say that,” she said, kicking up a foot and hitting him in the side of the head, sending him flying.

He landed, unconscious, by the door.

“Move him,” she instructed and Giles and Xander grabbed an arm each, pulling him away. “And barricade that,” she added, Spike pulling up some of the heavier equipment in front of the door. “Now, don’t let anyone get through.”

“Buffy,” Spike stopped her as she was about to turn and walk through the other opening. “Let me come with you.”

“No, I need you here,” she said with a small smile, and then she stepped into him, joining their lips in a deep kiss. “I’ll see you soon,” she added, before fastening her gaze in Giles’ and then in Xander’s, both of whom looked completely stunned. “And Adam’s controlling Riley, so you should probably tie him up.”

Spike furrowed his brow.

“Controlling?”

“I’m not sure how, but Maggie must have... Riley’s what Adam calls his brother,” she explained, then she turned and resolutely walked through the opening taking her into Adam’s domain.

Spike turned his head to the human lying knocked out on the floor. Giles’ eyes had just gone the same path and then they looked at one another.

There was a beat of silence, the three men all growing rather self-conscious.

“Something to tie him up,” Spike said.

“Yes, something to tie him up with,” Giles nodded, correcting his glasses before they all began combing their surroundings for something fitting.

¤

Buffy looked around the room she had entered. It had walls made of stone which looked thick and intimidating. The room wasn’t longer than fifteen yards and wasn’t wider than eight, but it was enough to host one of the more horrible sights Buffy had seen, simply because of the shock she suffered from it. She took a step forward, gripping the rusty railing before her as she was standing on a sort of platform, staring at the sight of Maggie Walsh shuffling lazily through the room.

“My God,” Buffy mumbled to herself.

The professor was sustained with artificial life. She looked like a zombie, her eyes layered with white; her skin grey and lifeless. Buffy carefully climbed down the ladder taking her to the floor. Another zombie seemed to be mindlessly following the form of Professor Walsh, and the Slayer wondered how strong they were.

“Hello, Buffy,” a voice said behind her and she spun around.

It was Forrest, one of the commandos, one of Riley’s friends. But he wasn’t strictly human anymore, demon parts having exchanged both his arms, most of his head and God knew what else. Buffy quickly went into battle mode, any left-over shock or disgust evaporating.

“Lookee here,” Buffy said, fighting stance making her body stiffen with expectation. “Mini-Adam.”

¤

“Joyce!” Ath yelled.

There was no answer and Calor closed the front door behind them as they moved into the living room.

“She’s at the gallery,” he said.

“Let’s hope she stays there. Willow, go get three white candles. They’re in...”

“I know,” Willow replied.

“Candles?” Calor asked.

“Ambience,” Ath answered, making him smile just as Willow returned.

Willow placed the candles on the rug in a triangle, lighting them with a steady hand and rising to face the two gods. She looked from one to the other, and then she said:

“Now what?”

Ath and Calor joined hands, stepping forward and raising their empty ones. Willow hesitated for only a moment, and then she put either hand in either of theirs so they formed a circle, the candles in the gaps between them.

“This may feel a little strange,” Ath said and the following moment a gust of wind tore through the midst of the circle, Willow drawing a breath and holding onto Ath and Calor’s hands even harder.

¤

“Find anything?” Spike asked.

Giles straightened his back, about to reply when he was hit in the side by a steel pipe. Xander turned around where he was standing, eyes widening as the pipe was swung in a wide angle, hitting him on the forehead.

“I did,” Riley replied to Spike’s question, as Xander sagged to the floor.

Spike stared at the mortal, at the rage burning in his eyes.

“This is gonna hurt,” the vampire murmured to himself as he got ready for the other to move forward.

Riley did, raising the pipe with a growl. Spike blocked it with one arm, stepping around the other and beginning to move about the room, anticipating another attack. It came, Riley lunging himself forward. Spike braced himself and kicked out a leg, hitting the other on the chin and making him stumble backward.

Pain shot through the vampire’s head and he screamed, his hands going to his temples.

Bloody hell, he really was crippled.

He heard the swoosh of the pipe and put one arm up, his hand catching it. He looked up at Riley, anger simmering into his own heart at the unmasked hatred on the other’s face. Was this Adam controlling Soldier Boy, or was it really payback? Then Riley’s knee connected with his ribs and he went down on all fours. The pipe hit the back of his neck and he fell forward on his stomach. The pipe hit again and he felt it broke through the skin. It hit again and he tried to get up, or at least roll away.

Then he saw feet approaching his face, about to close his eyes for the kick when he realized to whom they belonged. With a yell Giles rammed Riley into the wall, knocking the pipe out of his grip. Giles picked it up, but Riley was already out.

Giles reached down, grabbing Spike’s wrist and helping him get to his feet. The vampire looked rather taken aback.

“Thanks,” he said.

They both took in their fallen comrade in the corner – Xander not having stirred. Giles moved up to him and checked his pulse.

“He’ll be alright,” he said and Spike nodded.

Giles straightened up, holding out a roll of thin cable to the vampire.

“Something to tie him up with,” he said, producing a smirk of appreciation on Spike’s mouth, neither of them noticing Riley’s eyes opening.

¤

“I have been longing for this,” Forrest confided with a grin, approaching the Slayer.

“Yeah?” she asked, jumping up and kicking one foot out, hitting him in the chest and making him fly backwards. “I’m gonna make you regret it,” she stated as he rose.

He threw himself at her, but she kicked out a leg again, this time hitting him on the side of the head. He bounced back quickly and she could feel that he had the same strength as Adam had through the demon parts now active in his system. She ducked as he swung at her, but his next punch hit home and she saw stars. The following hook he delivered to her jaw sent her flying into a wall, creating an indentation in the thick cement before she slid to the floor with a thud.

“Is the regret supposed to set in after I kill you?” he taunted. “Because I’ve been freed from those more human traits of remorse and grief.”

“I feel sorry for you,” she said, getting to her feet and stopping his next hit with her hand catching his fist. “You made a deal with the devil, and now you’ll pay the price.”

“No,” he shook his head, “I’ll be paid a price for my loyalty, whereas you...”

“Stop talking,” she interrupted, swinging her free hand in a fist at his face, hitting him over and over until he had to take a step back.

She kicked up her left leg, hitting him high on the side and knocking the wind out of him. She heard his ribs crack and calculated she had broken at least five. A surge of satisfaction rose and she got ready to deliver the final blows.

¤

“You take the feet,” Spike said, leaning forward to begin to tie Riley’s hands when the human knocked him over the jaw before skilfully getting to his feet and avoiding all gripping hands as he headed for the opening.

“Bloody hell!” Spike and Giles yelled with one voice, scrambling after him.

¤

Buffy raised her hands, knotted together, aiming for Forrest’s neck, when Riley tore through the door opening above and jumped from the platform, landing smoothly on the floor. She looked up as Spike followed. Giles stopped at the railing, then began to climb down.

“No!” Buffy called out. “Stay up there!”

Forrest punched her in the stomach and she folded over. He kneed her in the side and she lost her balance, the wall catching her before she fell.

Giles had done as she asked, mostly because he had heard something hitting the barricaded door. When he got back in the room another hit occurred and the barricade buckled. He wouldn’t be able to manage this one by himself, Xander not being in any state to help.

“Spike!” he yelled.

“What?” the vampire drawled, spinning around and avoiding Riley’s aimed punch at his stomach.

“Finish up quickly, would you?”

“Sure, Rupert,” Spike replied, ducking. “Whatever you say!”

Buffy let out a huff as Forrest got in a too precise a punch to her back. It made Spike pause, looking over at her and seeing her vulnerable position as she was beginning to go down on her knees.

“Buffy!” he exclaimed, taking a step forward, but being stopped by Riley who grabbed him in a locking hold from behind. “Let me...go!” Spike yelled, thrashing furiously against the restraining arms.

Forrest kicked Buffy in the stomach, making her cough. She knew she had to get up, or she was done for. Another kick made her lose her breath completely and she couldn’t see properly, white dots dancing before her eyes.

Spike was starting to panic. It wasn’t a good thing, not in this situation. But bloody hell, she was getting killed right before his eyes. What the sod kinda power-boost had gotten into soldier boy, to make him be able to hold him back like this?

And just like that the grip was gone. He twirled around, ready for a stake in the chest. But it didn’t come. Riley’s face was covered in beads of sweat, one hand against his chest. He looked in extreme pain, but his eyes also told Spike exactly what he was doing, and what he wanted Spike to do.

The vampire gave a slight nod, turned around and delivered a double kick to Forrest’s shoulder and head. The first bringing him off balance, the second smashing him against the wall. Spike took hold of Buffy and pulled her to her feet.

“I’m okay,” she said, turning her eyes in Riley’s; they were growing unseeing again. “Fight it,” she said, taking a step forward. “You know you can. You’re better than this. You don’t have to...”

The sound of a drill interrupted her and she turned just in time to block the oncoming Maggie and the weapon she was wielding.

Spike met the kick Forrest was delivering, hitting him across the jaw and then jabbing him in the neck. Buffy grabbed Maggie’s wrists as the former professor was swinging the drill at the Slayer’s head. It seemed an endless moment as the drill’s hiss grew louder, the machine, for a moment, coming steadily closer until the Slayer defeated her assailant, flinging the drill, as well as Maggie Walsh, to the side, sending her stumbling into the arms of Riley.

“Spike!” Giles voice was heard.

Buffy moved forward as Spike raised an arm, taking the jab Forrest had just delivered. She kicked the half-demon in the stomach.

“Go,” she said to Spike.

He was reluctant. She could see he didn’t want to.

She kicked Forrest on the thigh.

“Go,” she repeated. “Help Giles.”

He gave a nod, running forward and jumping back up over the railing, landing on the platform and disappearing through the opening.

She heard Riley give a muffled scream and when she turned to him he had the drill in one hand, his other in a blooded fist. There was a cut across the left side of his chest. Her eyes widened. He dropped the drill and used the fist to hit Maggie forcefully enough to make her fall to the floor. Then he turned his eyes on Forrest. Buffy could see he was back, but the blood...!

“My God,” Riley murmured, eyes still on his former friend.

“That’s what I said,” Buffy stated.

“God has nothing to do with it,” Forrest said.

“When?” Riley asked him.

Forrest merely smirked.

“Riley...” Buffy began, but he put up a hand, opening the blooded one and revealing the chip he had successfully removed.

It made an odd clinking sound as it dropped to the hard stone of the floor.

“Adam’s behind that,” Riley said with a nod to a large circular shape in the wall at the far end of the room. “Go get him.”

“But...”

“I’m strong enough,” he said, eyes back in Forrest’s. “Go get him.”

Buffy gave him a look of thanks before she turned and ran for the way that would take her to what she had come for. The second zombie came lulling from the side, making some form of noise and seemingly about to try and stop her. She flung one arm out, hitting it square in the chest and sending it flying. Reaching the wall she looked for some sort of mechanism to open it, finding it to the right. Pressing her hand against it, the circular block rolled to the side. She moved through it before it had stopped its movement.

¤

Willow was flying at an awesome speed. Everything around her was a flare of bright. She could feel Ath’s hand in her left one, and Calor’s hand in her right one, and she wasn’t afraid, but she was growing tired, and that fast. She was beginning to feel like she couldn’t breathe. Then Ath’s voice broke through, speaking words of a language the Wicca had never heard before.

¤

Buffy entered a smaller room, five by four yards, the wall opposite the entrance containing a table with computers.

And before it stood Adam.

He turned around as she entered.

“Here I aim for the element of surprise,” she sighed, “and then I find out you’ve planned the whole thing.”

“I don’t like surprises.”

“Why doesn’t that surprise me.”

She moved forward, ducking as he swung an arm at her, putting a hook and a jab in his stomach. He punched her in the jaw and she stumbled backward. His left arm revealed its concealed weapon in the form of a long spear, shooting out from the inside of the wrist.

She regained her balance and in one movement she grabbed the spear and snapped it in half.

“Broke your arm,” she said.

“Got another one,” he remarked, his right arm transforming itself into some form of warped science project gone terribly array, the shape it took was that of a machine gun. “I’ve been upgrading,” he added.

Buffy’s eyes grew before she threw herself to the side, landing behind a set of metal boxes. The next moment she felt a crash of heat pour through her entire body. Her first thought was that she’d been shot, but then she felt the most powerful sense of completion. As though she had landed in herself for the first time in her life and knew exactly who she was and why she was. And what she was going to do next.

She stood up.

Speaking words she didn’t recognize, but still knew what they meant, she met Adam’s gaze with a confidence that stretched through generations of Slayer’s, their strength coursing through her blood stream.

“Interesting,” Adam said.

Letting his machine gun loose again he watched as the bullets hit an invisible wall, creating ripples in the air as though there was a sheet of water between them.

“Very interesting,” he murmured.

His arm turned into a rocket launcher.

Buffy felt like smiling.

He didn’t see that it was useless.

As the rocket came racing toward her she gently moved one hand and made it split itself into three white doves.

It was already over, but she did have to finish it.

Moving forward she grabbed the arm of his that had performed the attack. It was burning hot, but she barely felt it. His gaze was questioning, almost desperate. He couldn’t believe it. She would make him.

“But how can you...?” he began as her fingers gripped the steel so hard they made it buckle.

“You can never hope to grasp the source of our power,” she said, throwing him across the room and being on him the next moment, standing before him she set sight on the middle of his chest.

Drawing her arm back she then imbedded it, fist first, through his ribcage. Her fingers got hold of the throbbing core of his life force and she ripped it out without so much as a blink.

Adam looked truly surprised before he slipped to the side.

Dead.

She stared at the uranium in her hand, then it floated into the air, and again she spoke the foreign language. The core folded in on itself and with a subtle flicker it was gone.

The profoundly heightened power of her ancestry left her as suddenly as it had flooded her. She staggered, but drawing a breath she conquered the slight nausea she suffered and had one last look at her fallen adversary before she ran out through the doorway again.

The room where she had left Riley and Forrest fighting was empty. Then she spotted Forrest. He was lying on his back, the drill in his temple. She looked away with a disgusted grunt, her eyes landing on Riley. He was badly hurt, blood in a pool around him.

“Oh, God,” she breathed, running up to him and gently lifting his head.

Tears rose uncontrollably.

“Riley,” she said gently.

His eyes were open and they met hers searchingly. Then he smiled.

“Buffy,” he mumbled. “I’m so... sorry.”

“Hush,” she stopped him. “Don’t.”

There was a crash from the entry room above their heads. She carefully placed Riley’s head back down, rose and jumped up in the air, grabbing the railing and swinging herself over it. She ran inside. Giles, Spike and a now very conscious Xander were leaning against the door. It was practically in splinters.

“Buffy!” all of them said.

“Riley’s hurt. I’ll need you to take the front.”

They nodded in unison and it was all she needed. Turning back around she jumped back onto the floor, running up to Forrest and tearing his sweater off him and into shreds, rolling one part into a hard ball and placing it against the wound in Riley’s chest, using the others to tie around his torso to keep it in place. Then she lifted him into her arms. He groaned.

“You’ll be okay,” she said, taking aim on the platform and jumping again, this time clearing the railing and landing on the other side.

Giles came up; helping her put Riley on his feet and slinging one of his arms over his shoulders.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’ll take him,” he answered. “Just worry about creating a clear path forward and all will be quite well.”

She was about to protest, but Xander coming up, taking the other side, shut her up. She gave a nod, letting go of Riley and walking up to Spike. The pounding had stopped. All was quiet.

“What do you think?” she asked.

“That you’re a bloody miracle worker,” he replied.

She smiled.

“It wasn’t me,” she said, then cleared her throat. “On three.”

“One,” he agreed.

“Two.”

“Three!”

They ran out through the door, stumbling over the bodies of four dead demons, the signs of an in-group brawl obvious.

“Bleeding gits,” Spike chided.

They ran as quickly as they could down the deserted hallway. They were about to enter the larger room, explosions reaching their ears, but Riley moaned in protest, making them stop.

“Door,” he murmured, looking at the wall in front of them.

Spike walked up to it, searching the whiteness until he felt a slight bump in its smoothness. He pressed it and the wall slid to the side. They all moved forward as one person, entering the tight space and immediately becoming a single file. They were moving upward now, steadily. Buffy scented the stench of blood from all five of them. Her heart was beating hard with adrenaline. She just wanted to get out of there, to breathe fresh air again. In less than a minute her wish was granted.

The Snapping Thread

Willow opened her eyes with effort.

She was lying on the floor. Where? She slowly began to recognize her surroundings. Buffy’s living room. Her head was burning. She felt strange. Her skin was too tight. Then something cool was at her lips and she began to swallow water.

“Easy,” Ath’s voice said, the goddess hand under the Wicca’s neck. “Easy.”

Willow’s sight cleared and she looked up at the twins with a wondrous expression.

“What happened?” she asked.

“You went for a ride,” Calor smiled. “You haven’t fully come back yet, but don’t worry. In an hour you’ll feel normal again.”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever feel normal again,” Willow said, sitting up with the help of Ath. “That was... the most amazing thing I’ve ever... seen or felt or...”

Ath smiled.

“But it won’t be the last most amazing thing,” she reassured. “And the next time, I’m positive it’ll be all you.”

¤

The concealed entrance to the Initiative lay less than a mile from the caves Adam had used. The Slayer burst through it with her muscles burning. The toll the past half hour had taken on her was making itself known as the pressure was lessening.

“He’s dying,” she said as she saw Riley’s head loll forward. “God, he’s dying.”

Spike took Giles’ place at that before catching Buffy’s gaze. She understood what he was doing and made Xander give her his spot.

“Go back to the house,” Spike said.

Giles exchanged a look with Xander, and then the Slayer and the Vamp began to run. They were soon out of sight.

Xander touched his forehead, bringing his hand away he looked at the blood glistening off his fingertips.

“You alright?” Giles asked, beginning to walk, he was halting slightly.

Xander observed him, then followed.

“I’ve felt worse,” he said. “You?”

“Oh, this is nothing,” the Watcher shrugged.

They stopped at the same time, looking to their left.

There, illuminated slightly in the light of the sun filing peacefully through the trees, stood a bench.

They exchanged a look.

“Maybe just a short rest,” Giles said.

“Yeah, I could go with that. As long as it’s short,” Xander nodded.

¤

“We need a doctor!” Buffy yelled as they entered the ER.

Spike was falling back, smoking from the sun and wanting to dodge wondering eyes.

A nurse had spotted the blood covering both Buffy and Riley and was coming down the corridor with a gurney. A doctor soon joined her and Buffy helped place Riley on the rolling contraption.

“I’m Dr. Alvarez,” the doctor introduced himself. “What happened here?”

“He hurt himself,” Buffy replied, sight blurry from tears again.

“He did this?”

“Part of it... He was in a fight... Will he be alright?”

“It’s much too early to tell, Ms...?”

“Summers. Buffy Summers.”

“Ms. Summers,” another nurse stopped her. “I’ll need you to give me some information.”

“But...”

“You won’t be permitted in there,” the nurse said, seeing that Buffy wanted to go with Riley. “You’ll have to wait. Please, I need some information.”

Buffy relented, giving the nurse all the information she had on Riley Finn, including the fact that he was an army employee. Spike joined at her side, having cleaned most of the blood off himself. His neck was still throbbing, though. He hadn’t thought much of it, but now it struck him as unusual. Pain had never been a problem for him because it didn’t linger. This seemed awfully persistent. The worry on Buffy made him forget about it.

He slid one hand into one of hers and she looked at him. She seemed exasperated, but she stepped into him with a grateful expression in her eyes, wrapping her arms around him as he did the same to her, holding her close.

“He can’t die,” she murmured and he softly stroked her hair.

“He won’t,” he said, trying to forget any animosity he might still harbor toward the human. “He won’t,” he repeated with more feeling.

When she pulled back she saw the blood residue at the side of his throat. She furrowed her brow.

“You badly hurt?” she asked and he shook his head.

“Scratch,” he assured.

She smiled a little and they walked into the waiting area, sinking down in the uncomfortable chairs.

They were quiet for a while, then she smiled again, looking at him.

“Well, this isn’t exactly where I’d pictured us sitting,” she said.

“Oh? And where did you picture us?”

Her smile faded slightly and he reached out a hand, sliding it behind her neck and pulling her close again. She leaned against him, closing her eyes.

“It’ll be okay,” he mumbled, kissing the top of her head.

The fact that he stayed with her through the grueling hours they had to wait meant the world to her. He didn’t leave her side for a second, and though they barely spoke, having him there told her everything she needed to know.

¤

At seven fifteen the doctor came out to speak to them. He said that Riley Finn had lost a lot of blood. That Mr. Finn had come within inches of his life. That Mr. Finn had been saved by nothing less than divine intervention because his heart had stopped for three minutes. But Mr. Finn would live, and would live fully restored to health. It might take a while, but he would be fine.

Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike, crying with relief, the tension finally lifting.

They were permitted one brief visit, but Spike declined.

“The last thing he’ll wanna see is me,” he stated.

“But...you’ll be here?”

“I’ll wait right here,” he promised and she kissed him briefly before heading down the hall.

She stepped into the room and tried to keep any sign of being troubled off her. There were just so many things he was hooked up to. And a heart monitor was beeping at the side of the bed. She swallowed the tears, walking up to him and placing a light kiss on his forehead.

His eyes opened heartbreakingly slow.

“Buffy?” he got out.

“Don’t talk. The doctor said you shouldn’t talk. I just... wanted to say hello.” Her voice broke as the tears welled over. “You’re going to be fine,” she added, grasping the hand of his closest to her in a soft grip.

He smiled a very small smile, his hand squeezing hers back before his eyes closed again.

“You’re gonna be fine,” she repeated.

Spike rose as she came back out. She allowed herself a yawn and he smiled.

“We should head home,” he said.

“I’m not sure,” she murmured.

“Friends ‘ll be worried about you,” he disagreed. “We’ll leave your number at the desk, ask them to call if there’s any change.”

She was uncertain, but when she met his gaze she knew that he was right. So she nodded, left her number with the attending nurse, and was thankful for the arm Spike put around her as support as they headed for the exit.

¤

Everybody was gathered in the living room when the Slayer and the Vamp arrived at the house. Willow rose, coming up to her friend with an anxious expression on, as well as an empathic one.

“Hey,” she said.

Buffy tried a smile, but it didn’t quite take.

“Hi,” she said, returning Willow’s hug.

“You okay?” Willow asked Spike, who nodded, offering her a smile as well.

The whole group was weary with the strain of the battle they had just won, and the shock of the injuring of one of their fellows. The sweetness of victory was late in setting in. It had all happened so fast, and hadn’t been given the proper chance to settle as reality.

“Alright, Riley’s in the hospital, but he’s gonna recover completely,” Buffy said. “I can’t commend all of you enough for... everything you did today. Without all of you I never could have done this.” She met Ath’s and then Calor’s eyes with her own and they both smiled. “I’m... barely able to stand here,” she added. “I’m gonna try and get some sleep. I think we could all use it.”

Xander eyed her and Spike. Giles noticed it and when Xander opened his mouth to speak the Watcher placed a hand lightly on his arm, stopping him. Xander clenched his jaws together.

¤

Spike closed the bedroom door, Buffy crawling onto her bed and then laying so she could watch him slip his duster off his shoulders. He paused as his eyes rested in hers, then smiled, coming up to the bed and placing himself alongside her. Her hand found his cheek, and her face seemed to darken for only a moment, before it lit up from within with a light that warmed him. She smiled lovingly.

“Thank you for staying with me,” she said, voice low.

“Where else would I have gone?” he asked, her smile widening.

She carefully entwined one hands fingers with his, resting her cheek against his shoulder.

“Is it really over?” she asked.

“We’ll see tomorrow,” he said, sliding one arm under her and pulling her nearer.

She closed her eyes, putting her right arm across his chest. Had she not always slept here? In this space between his arm and chest? Secure? Had she really been the crazy image of a woman not feeling what she felt now? No, she hadn’t. She’d been the crazy image of a woman refusing to admit to feeling what she felt now. When had she fallen in love with him? For how long had she fought this with teeth and claws? She really was an idiot, when she could have enjoyed this for all these excruciating weeks.

Worry for Riley rose quickly as she couldn’t quite let go of the fact that she hadn’t only been deceiving herself, she’d been deceiving him.

But then she nuzzled her nose into Spike’s chest and all that could bother her slipped away. She was with him. And she was happy.

Spike let his fingers play with a stray lock of her hair. His head was filled with her scent, his heart still not sure if it was true, if she was lying there next to him, falling asleep in his arms. Then a smile settled on his lips and he closed his eyes.

She was.

¤

Ath stepped out onto the porch, closing the kitchen door and drawing a deep breath of the evening air. She wrapped the blanket she had brought around her, and sat down on the second step, looking out over the yard and then tilting her head back to stare into the infinity of the night sky.

She hesitated, then came to a decision and let her mind search for Jonathan.

She found him in his room. He was sitting on his bed. He wasn’t angry anymore, she could feel the core of his emotions waft at her and go straight through her. Defeat, puzzlement, disbelief. Sorrow. He wasn’t crying, but she could tell he had been.

He was looking intensely at something in his hands. Finally she could make out what it was. A box of ready-to-bake brownies. She frowned.

“Oh, Jonathan,” she whispered, smiling to herself. “That’s beneath you.”

She concentrated until she had moved her essence to sit beside him on the bed. Invisible to him, though she knew he could feel her if she wanted him to.

She had to let him go.

But she couldn’t help placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.

He turned his head to where she was, one of his hands rising in the air, beginning to reach out for her.

In a blink she was back in her human body.

Calor was seated beside her.

“Saying goodbye?” he asked.

She nodded.

“Yeah,” she murmured. “He isn’t finished yet... His role... it has barely started. I’ll see him, I know I will. When he’s done. I just wish it didn’t hurt so much.”

Calor touched her hand and she gave him a flicker of a smile.

“It’s almost time,” Calor said and Ath nodded again.

“I’m curious, myself, to see what father has to say.”

Calor wasn’t curious, because he thought he knew what he would say. He wanted to get it over with, though he regretted not having said a proper goodbye to Buffy.

¤

The room in which Ath played Dwindle was empty of any sign of life, and so was the library where knowledge was in constant change as the human race evolved. Ath looked at Calor with slight disappointment.

“I wasn’t expecting a fanfare and release of doves at our homecoming, but I thought there would at least be someone to greet us,” she said.

Calor smirked.

The sun shone through the great hall of the gods’ home. Outside stretched a black and foreboding space, where stars had hung as the only ornate decoration for eternity’s eternity. Each time one was extinguished, one was born in its place, and to watch the birth of a star was one of the greatest pleasures in the divine community. At this time, unbeknownst to Ath and Calor, one of these rare occasions was about to take place.

They heard the unmistakable sound of a gong, both of them exchanging an excited glance at the realization of where everyone were. The gong was only used to bid silence in the auditorium, and the only time silence needed to be bid in that place was when the event people had gathered for was too grand to shut up about.

Ath and Calor quickly made their way to the extensive space, where those they had known their entire existence were all gathered, gazing up into the vast universe above, below and around them.

The twins found their father at his honorary seat, and took their own on either side of him.

“Calor,” he greeted. “Athania.”

“Father,” they said in one voice.

“How was your journey?”

“Educational,” Ath replied.

“Profound,” Calor mumbled and his father turned his eyes on him. “I have learned humility, and found it a great lesson. I believe I understand why you sent me there.”

Bortha smirked, not replying.

“And what was your lesson, child?” he instead asked Ath.

“To lose – and not despair,” she answered slowly. “I see now why hope is man’s most formidable ally.”

Bortha’s smirk widened.

They were silent, looking up at the gathering of commotion above their heads. Small fire balls were rushing all around them, making a good imitation of fireflies gone berserk. Their trail all led in a wide circle upwards, to the epicenter of all the activity, where they glowed together in fusion.

“Did you send us on a fool’s errand on purpose?” Calor couldn’t help but ask.

Bortha resisted answering for another minute, then replied:

“The wisdom of Life cannot be had without living. You must be inspired, if you expect to inspire, am I not right? You are the forms of intelligence, of bravery, and indeed, of hope. People carry on because they believe. They believe in themselves, or the world, or God. They believe in a purpose in all they do. If they lose that belief, there is no more hope. They cannot make themselves move forward. They begin to die. I wanted you to understand what it is we have sworn to protect. A small amount of that belief. The Slayer is a testament to man’s ferocious struggle against darkness, against evil, against all that will never stop to smite their belief right out of them. I did not send you on a fool’s errand, my son.”

“But you knew...” Calor began, unsure of whether he should go on. His father looked inquisitive and so he continued: “You knew that there was nothing we could do to stop them.”

“And why should you have stopped them?”

“You sent me there... sent us there...”

“Yes, yes, I sent you. I said nothing about stopping them. My concern was for Spike deciding to leave Sunnydale for good. Love was always predicted between them, it did not worry me that it had arrived a little early. Fate, as you so eloquently put it, will not let herself be tampered with that easily. But what would have happened if love’s hold was not strong enough, if he left town, as he nearly did...? He might have gotten killed. He might not have been there to push Buffy on when she needed it. And if either of them died prematurely, all would have been lost. The Seventh is coming and will come, with or without the most important pieces for the forces of good. And so I am very pleased with you both.”

“But we didn’t do anything,” Ath remarked.

“You did plenty more than you think. Rookie mistakes some would call it, but many of which led to the union now so gloriously unfolding between them.” He placed either hand on one each of his children’s shoulders. “I knew you would do the right thing. What you needed was a good kick in the behind to get you going. Falling to the earth from billions of light years away will do that to you.”

Both Ath and Calor smiled at that.

“What will happen to them now?” Ath asked quietly.

“There is turmoil ahead of them,” Bortha stated. “But they have grown used to it by now, and will move through it as though the water was barely ruffled, as though the river was never wild... They’ll become quite inseparable, I fear.”

“Fear?” Calor wondered, thinking it an odd word choice.

“The pattern has been altered. The balance has shifted. What I have prophesized will still come to pass, but changes are up ahead... In the end she may choose another path.”

“What do you mean?” Ath asked, feeling alarm rise.

“She will see the world already has been blessed with her kin, and in abundance. When he asks her to go, she may not. She may stay with him.”

Calor’s eyes widened.

“What are you saying? That she... that she’ll die?”

“The fabric we weave is a fragile thing, my son. You altered its appearance and now, to not rip, it may have to alter with it. Sacrifices have always been made.”

“She will die with him. As he saves the world?” Ath asked. “And you’re saying... it will be her time, when it happens?”

Bortha gave a slow nod, gaze fastened on the explosion of light occurring high above.

Neither Ath nor Calor took any notice. They were both too shocked to think of anything but what they might have done.

“But she may choose to live,” Ath said.

“There is always the choice,” Bortha confirmed.

Ath and Calor exchanged a worried look, both of them struck with a sudden longing to go back, if so only for one day, knowing they would never get the chance again. All they could do now was wait patiently, and hope that Buffy would know to make the right choice... Whatever that might be.

¤

The Slayer and the Vamp were sleeping. Curled together on her bed. They slept most of the next day and Buffy didn’t rouse before the sun had already set. She blinked, stretching before she turned her head up and saw whom she was with.

There was a rush of butterflies everywhere within here whenever she acknowledged her love for him. They brought a smile to her face, and that smile widened simply because it was permitted audience on her mouth. She reached up a hand and placed it on his cheek.

His eyes slowly opened.

He returned her smile, pulling her close.

She held onto him, not wanting anything else than this. It was as though the thread that once had held her back had snapped and thus released her straight into his arms. And he would never let her go.

Her hands slid through his hair to the back of his head, and then she frowned, pulling them away and staring uncomprehendingly at her fingers. They were gleaming red. Her heart stopped as she fastened her gaze in his. At first he looked as surprised as her, and then his face contorted into a mask of pain right before he screamed, his body stiffening tightly against hers.

“Oh, my God, what’s happening!” she exclaimed, trying to relieve the hurt somehow, her hands running over his arms, his shoulders, his jaw and hair. “You said you weren’t hurt!” she added, almost accusingly as he began to still.

“Didn’t think I was,” he murmured.

She made him turn on the side so she could glance on the pillow where his head had rested. It was caked with blood. He must have started bleeding a while ago. Her heart jump started itself and began pounding in her chest.

“It’s the chip,” he said. “It’s the only thing that hurts that bleeding much... Has to be the chip. Soldier Boy...”

“What about Riley?” she asked, feeling Spike begin to grow rigid again and knowing another jolt of pain wasn’t far away.

“Hit me,” Spike got out before he screamed again.

“God damn it!” she yelled, getting to her feet on the bed and jumping off it, beginning to pull her clothes on.

She had just gotten her sweater on when Xander and Giles came through the door, both armed.

“Put those down,” she huffed, shaking her head at them.

“What’s wrong with him?” Xander wondered as Spike once more grew relaxed, his fists slowly unclenching and his eyes meeting Xander’s, who was bravely ignoring the fact that the vampire was clearly stark naked under the sheet covering him from the waist down.

“Malfunction in the noggin’,” Spike replied in Buffy’s stead. “No sodding worries, mate. Soon I’ll be right as ra-...”

But the word turned into another scream, even louder this time, and Buffy ran up to him, grabbing his hands and holding them tightly, waiting until the seizure stopped.

“I’m going for help,” she said.

“Where? What bloody help is there?”

She merely gave him a look and he wanted to protest, but didn’t know what good it would possibly do him to keep the chip in like this. It would turn him into more of an invalid than he already was, probably drive him insane as well.

“I won’t be long,” she promised, kissing him softly on the mouth before stepping back, turning to Xander and Giles. “I need you to look after him,” she said. “Try and dress the wound and just... make him stay still.”

“Where are you going?” Giles asked.

“The hospital,” she replied, walking passed them out of the room.

Xander followed her.

“Is this a good idea?” he asked.

“Is what a good idea?”

“What you’re doing.”

“And what is that?”

“Saving him.”

“I thought it was obvious why I’m saving him,” she replied, reaching the foot of the stairs and turning to him. “Please, don’t do this. Not now.”

He stared at her.

“How long?”

“It just happened. Or... a month ago, depending how you look at it.”

“Buffy...”

“I don’t have time to argue with you, Xander. It’s my personal life, and as my friend I’m asking you to back the hell off. Accept it, or don’t. But if you want to see me happy, Xand, really, very happy, then you’ll go up there and stay by him until I come back.”

She touched his arm gently, then turned and ran out through the front door.

¤

She managed to get into Riley’s room after minutes of deliberating with the head nurse, leaving the Slayer wishing she could strangle mortals slowly. She closed the door behind her and approached the bed. He was sleeping, and she knew she couldn’t upset him, not for anything. So, would she have to choose? Between Riley and Spike? Again?

But Riley opened his eyes then, meeting her haggard appearance with a slight smile.

“Wearing the official Slayer ensemble, I see,” he murmured. “Clothes inside out and a frantic expression.”

She smiled.

“I’m here on unofficial business,” she replied gently, taking his hand. “How are you feeling?”

“I guess I could choose the trite reply of ‘Like someone beat the crap out of me’, but that’s pretty close to the truth so I might stick with it.”

Her smile widened, then she felt the urgency of the situation and said tentatively:

“I come for a favor. A big, big favor. And I need to ask it of you right away. I wouldn’t, if it wasn’t important.”

Riley eyed her, then said:

“His chip?”

She clenched her jaws together, then nodded.

“I suppose he told you it was my fault?”

She nodded again, her grip on his hand hardening unconsciously. He smiled again.

“It was Adam who wanted the vampire dead, not me.”

“I know,” she said. “Just... Can you help?”

“I can’t answer that right away,” he mumbled. She could tell he was drifting off. “Just... wait a little while.”

“How long does he have?” she asked, eyes building up with suppressed tears.

But Riley was gone. She brought her hand up to her lips and kissed it gently before placing it back at his side, carefully. Leaving the room she let hope flow through her veins, and the faith she had in Riley came with it. He had never let her down before, he wouldn’t start now.

¤

Spike’s screams met her when she came through the door, Willow soon appeared, coming from the dining room with an apprehensive look on her face.

“What did he say?” she asked as she joined Buffy in walking up the stairs.

“That he’ll try. But, Will, he’s badly hurt... I don’t know what he can do.”

“He probably has something in his tooth that he can bite and send a signal that he wants to speak to someone from the government,” Willow calmed. “They’ll come.”

“I don’t know if I want them to,” Buffy grumbled. “I don’t know if I trust them.”

“Trust Riley,” Willow said. “He won’t let Spike be harmed.”

“I guess he won’t,” Buffy agreed.

She stepped into her bedroom and felt a smile grow onto her lips at the sight of the two men sitting at a chair each, keeping watch over the vampire. She caught Xander’s gaze and held it with all the appreciation and gratitude she felt for him in that moment. He smiled very slightly, but it was enough to make her feel even calmer. It would be fine. It all would be.

They seemed to have struggled a pair of pants on Spike, and Buffy kept her smile from broadening.

Giles and Xander rose, heading for the door as Buffy walked up to the bed. She touched Spike’s forehead.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Giles murmured from the doorway and she turned her head to him, then she smiled another smile.

“I know what I’m feeling, that’s enough for me,” she answered.

He didn’t look particularly approving, but she didn’t mind it. He’d come around. He didn’t hate Spike, she knew that. He didn’t trust him, but he’d barely had reason to yet. Someday soon, he would.

She sat down next to Spike, who was looking at her through a haze of pain.

As long as she was there, he could endure anything.

“They’re coming,” she said, placing her lips at his brow and closing her eyes as he did the same, one of his hands finding one of hers. “They’re coming,” she repeated.

¤

And three hours, fifteen minutes and thirty-six seconds later they came.

“Buffy!” Willow yelled right before the door to the bedroom opened.

Buffy turned to it from where she’d been sitting on the edge of the bed. Two men came into the room, wearing army clothes and distinctive sour expressions.

“We were sent by Colonel Adams. The specimen...”

“If you call him that just one more time I’ll show you what sort of specimen I am,” she stopped them, rising.

“You’re to come with us,” one of the men stated. “There’s nothing we can do for him here.”

“Fine. As long as I have insurance that nothing’s going to happen to him,” Buffy replied.

“Riley Finn is in charge of this operation. You’ll have to take that up with him.”

Buffy couldn’t hold back a smile of relief, turning her eyes in Spike’s. He didn’t look quite as comforted, but her expression soothed him. The two soldiers put him on a gurney and carried him outside, into the waiting transportation – a green painted ambulance with a red cross on the side.

Buffy wasn’t far behind, taking a seat next to the vampire.

The ride didn’t take more than forty minutes, but Spike was continually worsening and Buffy went from despair to complete belief that everything would be alright and back to despair again. She focused on keeping him calm, and felt it calmed her at the same time.

The air was filled with dust as they entered a stretching dirt road. It was closing in on midnight and the moon stood full in the sky, impregnating the lonesome landscape with its bluish glow until the leaves turned silver and the sand glistened seductively.

The lights of the base came into view and within ten minutes they were stopping in front of a large building.

“I never knew this was here,” Buffy said.

“And when you leave, you’ll forget all about it,” the taller of the two soldiers warned before they brought Spike out, carrying him inside.

Colonel Adams was an imposing character, stout and wearing a cropped beard he came up to the operation table where the men placed Spike, looking the vampire over with a disapproving frown and turning to her.

“I don’t believe agent Finn knows exactly what he’s asking of me, but since he just came out of a life threatening situation with a heap of information vital to the closing of the Initiative...” Buffy’s eyebrows rose and the Colonel cleared his throat before continuing: “Well, I feel I owe him. Now, I have a question for you.”

Two doctors and three nurses entered from a side door, all wearing white. Buffy felt her pulse beat against her temple.

It’ll be alright, she told herself. It’ll be alright.

She looked at the colonel, wonderingly.

“We can either repair the chip, or remove it,” he explained. “Agent Finn said it was up to you.”

Buffy turned her gaze to Spike, and a small smile placed itself on her mouth.

¤

“Here comes the bread,” Joyce said, coming into the dining room with a basket full of hot rolls.

Everybody ooh- and aaah-ed and she smiled, placing it on the table.

It was ten o’clock the following morning.

In the Summers dining room were gathered Giles, Xander, Anya, Willow, Tara, Joyce, Buffy and Spike. Breakfast was laid out and beautifully so, having been prepared by Joyce, Willow and Tara.

“I think the best one is when the fox tries to kill the bird with a stone,” Anya said, following up on the topic of conversation which had reigned for the past ten minutes.

“He’s not a fox, dear, he’s a wolf,” Xander corrected. “And it’s not a stone, it’s a very big rock.”

“Well, excuse me,” she muttered, then smiled and gave him a peck on the cheek. “It’s quite the wonder I still love you, when you have such a diverse passion for animated short-films.”

“I love how you phrase it, though,” he smirked and Spike smiled as well.

“I always liked Scooby-Doo,” Buffy said. “Pass me the bread, honey.”

Spike did as she asked, receiving a kiss on the nose for the effort.

“Yes, it’s good in its way,” Xander nodded. “But it doesn’t quite live up to the standards of say Tom and Jerry.”

“Oh, come on!” Buffy disagreed. “That cat and mouse stuff is so obviously a metaphor for men chasing women. And the mouse always wins, figure that.”

“What are you talking about, love?” Spike asked, affronted. “Tom and Jerry happens to be about friendship. Overcoming obstacles. Even when those are one wanting to kill the other.”

She smirked at that, giving him a kiss on the mouth.

“I always liked the Smurfs,” Willow said.

“Classic, classic,” Xander nodded. “Just like you not to let us forget something so important.”

She smiled.

“And what about the Carebears?” Buffy asked. “I know someone who’s said to always have wished to meet one when he was... a week ago,” she teased and Xander threw a piece of bread at her.

“They’re so smart,” he rebuffed. “If everybody watched the Carebears and nothing but the Carebears, I’m telling you, this world would be a better place.”

“I could retire,” Buffy said, leaning into Spike who put an arm around her.

“We all could,” Xander remarked.

There was a lapse of silence, then Tara said hesitantly:

“I really liked the Flintstones.”

“Oh, I forgot about that one,” Willow said.

“That’s a good one,” Spike agreed.

“I never really saw that one,” Buffy pouted.

“Yabba-dabba-doo!” Xander exclaimed, all of them laughing.

Joyce exchanged a look with Giles.

“Did you follow that?” she asked and he shook his head.

“We’re getting too old for this,” he smiled and she smiled back, nodding in concurrence.

¤

That night Buffy came down the stairs, wrapping a large scarf around her. Spike was waiting outside.

“Buffy,” Willow said, noticing the scarf. “You going out?”

“For a walk,” Buffy confirmed.

Willow smiled a little.

“You happy?” she asked and Buffy mirrored the smile.

“I think I really am,” she replied.

Willow stepped up on the first step as Buffy walked up to the door, then the Wicca turned to her friend and said:

“When we were doing the spell, it was like I tasted something of my future... It was really weird.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine! It was just... weird.”

“What did it taste like?”

Willow thought for a moment, then replied:

“Bitter strawberries.”

Buffy smiled slightly at that, her hand on the doorknob when Willow had one more question.

“They... went home, didn’t they?”

Buffy felt a sting. She had thought Ath and Calor would at least have gotten the change to say goodbye, but she guessed she’d been wrong.

“Yeah,” she then replied. “They did.”

The night air was crisp when she stepped outside. And there was her man. She smirked a little at the thought, though it was growing more familiar by the minute. She walked up to him, linking their fingers together and beginning to stroll at his side.

They both had they eyes on the starry sky, looking at the endlessness of it all and feeling quite small in the big schemes of things. Buffy wondered if it was with good reason, or if they should feel larger than life after what they had accomplished two nights ago. They had beat the Big Bad again. They had saved many people form death and destruction, perhaps even the earth. She was thankful they would never know just how powerful Adam’s army could have gotten.

Suddenly two shooting stars appeared, and Buffy felt her breath catch. Then she smiled, knowing that the Powers were ever working around her. Be it in the shape of God or nature or faith or love, they were always present, and always would be.

Goodbye, she thought, adding: for now.

Neither Spike nor she spoke, but they didn’t need to.

It was enough to be there, next to one another.

They arrived at his crypt without realizing it.

As slowly as they had undressed two mornings earlier, as slowly did they undress now, before each others eyes. Their pale skin stood out against the harsh dark of the cave as they melted together once more.

¤

“Tell me why you took the chip out,” he asked of her a few hours later, their limbs entwined comfortably on his bed.

“Because Willow was right when she said that it isn’t my choice or anyone else’s to try and control you. You need to make that choice for yourself. And I know it’ll be hard for you. But I believe in you.”

He smiled a little.

“Do you really?”

She moved her head up to lock her gaze with his, then replied firmly:

“Really.”

She smiled as his widened, then kissed him deeply before pulling back and asking:

“There’s something I’ve been wondering. I think I know the answer, but...”

“What?”

“Well, when I was younger you told me that you thought the reason Drusilla left you was because of your alliance with me... against her and Angel.”

He cocked an eyebrow, but of course he knew what she wanted to have said.

“Yeah?” he asked, not wanting to make it too easy for her.

“Well... the way you said it made it sound like you were wrong. That there was... another reason.”

He looked at her with a blank, uncomprehending expression, then he smirked and she did as well.

“Am I being... nosy?” she asked.

“Full of yourself, more like,” he remarked. “What do you want, a five page confession?” he then asked and she laughed.

“Just tell me.”

“Alright, fine. Drusilla said that all she could see when she looked at me – was you, I told you that. And I fooled myself into thinking it was because I betrayed her that she was seeing it... but I needed you. Even then, I needed you. It was a wanting that brought me back here. It was you, and everything else was just bloody poor excuses, weren’t they? But I couldn’t see it. Wouldn’t let myself.”

“You don’t say?” she asked, then smiled again.

She was happier now, if that was possible. She had heard what he had told her mother about Drusilla, after all. He would always hold some form of affection for her. And maybe it was silly of the Slayer to believe that affection could ever come between the one he held for her. But now she was even more convinced it never would.

“I love you, William Thackary Kingsley,” she stated with sudden tease in her green eyes and he winced at the sound of his human name, looking baffled and wondering that she knew it. “I’ve been reading up on you, Sir the Bloody. Giles has some pretty interesting journals in his possession.”

Spike looked shocked, then grabbed her and turned her on her back.

“I’ll burn them before you learn any more of my secrets.”

“Now, ‘Thackary’, is that from your mother’s or your father’s side?” she giggled as he tried to wrestle her down, not really succeeding.

Finally he caught hold of her wrists and brought them over her head, pinning her down and resting his eyes in hers.

“I really do love you, too, Ms. Summers,” he murmured, before sealing his words with a kiss.