Chapter 5


Spike tried all night not to let on how upset he was about his and Buffy's spat. His mom and Dawn didn't seem to suspect. He and Buffy had arguments in the past that were much louder and much more violent than the one they had today, but this was the first since they were together. Why couldn't she try to understand the position he was in? Like he'd choose watching 'The Sound of Music' with Dawn and Joyce over a night of hot, wild sex.

He loved his family, but hot, wild sex with the woman he...cared for--was going to win hands down every time. Why was she being such a jerk about it?

At 11 o'clock, Spike was taking the trash out to the curb for his mother. They had a nice time tonight. They had some good Chinese takeout, talking and joking around before settling down for a nightcap of uncensored yodeling.

Spike hated that movie, way too sugary for his taste--but he enjoyed his mother and Dawn's company. The blonde Slayer appreciated these family nights that much more after Joyce's illness. And with Glory still hanging around, Dawn was in grave danger. Who knew what would happen tomorrow? One of them might not be around to enjoy another family night. He wished that Buffy could understand that.

"Hey."

Spike looked up to where he heard the voice coming from. Druscilla stepped out of the shadows with a smile on her face. She was dressed all in black (slacks, button-up shirt and her long black coat). Her dark-brown hair was done up immaculately, as usual, tight ringlets spilled over her shoulders and down her back.

"Dru?" He was shocked to see her. "What--what are you doing in Sunnydale?"

It was good to see her. Spike couldn't help the way he always lit up when she was near.

"I had a little business to take care of in town...I thought I'd stop by and say hello. Hello." She grinned.

Spike looked as good as ever, maybe even better than ever to her. He was wearing those button-fly jeans that fit him oh-so-damned-well and a blue t-shirt. He'd never looked more edible.

"That's--great. It's nice to see you. You want to come in?" Spike put the trash bag down next to the driveway.

"I can't stay long...Do you, uh--would you like to take a walk? We could catch up a little bit."

Seeing Joyce wasn't a top priority for the ensouled nosferatu. It was clear as Viennese crystal that the matriarch of the Summers clan wasn't Dru's biggest fan.

"Sure, yeah. Let me just grab my jacket and let Mom know where I'm going. You know how she worries." He smiled crookedly and jogged up to the house.

Dru sighed, watching his pert ass as he went up to the house.

'Like two cats trying to fight their way out of a paper bag...Mother Mary, the lad has a fine ass...'

She'd been thinking about him a lot lately. It hurt to see him and know she couldn't have him, but torturing herself was one of the things she was best at since she'd gotten the soul.


 

Spike and Dru walked in the park, side by side.

"How's LA?" he asked.

It was hard to talk about her new life, the life she'd left him to start, but he still cared about her. He wanted to know if she was happy.

"It's okay. Crowded. Lots of demon activity to keep me busy. Traffic is a nightmare. But all in all, it's a good place to be." She smiled at him.

"How's 'Guardian Angel Investigations' doing?" Spike asked, referring to the detective agency Dru had started in LA. "Do you get a lot of business?"

"It's going well. We get our fair share of business. The money isn't pouring in, but it's enough to keep us afloat. I've helped a lot of people, that's really the important thing."

"Good...I'm glad."

They sat down on a bench and looked up at the stars.

"How is everyone?" Dru asked.

"Oh...they're fine."

Spike didn't want to get into the drama that happened yesterday. Dru didn't need to know about all that. He wasn't sure if he should tell Dru about him and Buffy. She wouldn't like it at all and he wanted her brief visit to be pleasant.

They were quiet for a few moments. Dru chuckled.

"What's funny?" Spike asked, smiling.

"I was just thinking--about our first kiss. That was some night."

"Which part? The part where we actually kissed or afterwards, when you went into game face and I screamed like a woman?"

They laughed.

"The kiss part. It was memorable..."

"Yeah, it was."

Spike remembered how much he wanted her back then. She was so beautiful and mysterious. She still was.

"How's--Sam?" Dru asked, making her dislike of his new girlfriend apparent by the tone of her voice.

"We--aren't together anymore. It didn't work out."

"Oh?!" she said happily. "I mean, oh?" she said with mock seriousness.

He nodded.

"I'm--sorry to hear that...She seemed--nice," Dru said.

"Yeah, I can tell you're real broken up about it." He smirked.

"I am sorry that you're alone. You deserve to be happy, Spike." She put her hand on his and looked him in the eyes.

She was so conflicted. She wanted him to move on and have a good life, but she was also was terribly jealous when he tried to do exactly that.

Spike was considering telling her about his relationship with Buffy when a male vampire walked towards them in game face.

"Well, well! What do we have here?" The vamp grinned, licking his chops. "Young lovers out for a midnight stroll. They're always so tasty!"

The vamp was dismayed by his prey's reactions.

Dru sighed and Spike rolled his eyes. This wasn't the horror-stricken, 'Oh my God, we're gonna die!' reaction he had been shooting for.

"First of all, it's not midnight, it's 11:30. And second, do you mind? We were having a conversation here?" Druscilla said with impatience.

"Yeah, could you maybe do a lap around the park and come back? We'll still be here. Promise," Spike chimed in with the trademark style of humor that was so often hidden from those in his overt circle.

"What?" The slow-witted vamp squinted. He puffed himself up. "You dare mock me, you pitiful mortals?!" he said in a growl.

Dru and Spike burst out laughing. "I like him!" Dru wiped at a tear. "He's cute. Don't kill him, Spike. Let's keep him around for comic relief."

"Wish I could," Spike sighed and stood up. "But there's the whole sacred calling thing, you know..." Spike went into a fighting stance. "Sorry, buddy. For what it's worth, your comic stylings were enjoyed by all," Spike said to the vamp before punching him in the face.

The vampire flew backwards in the air, Spike went after him.

Dru sat back to enjoy the show. She loved watching him kick some ass. Spike was so agile, so lithe...He was poetry in motion. She was getting more than a little turned on as she remembered the way his hot, tight, naked, muscular body felt against hers the night of his 17th birthday. The night they had made love for the first and last time. Going evil and losing her soul as a result of her moment of 'perfect happiness' kind of put a damper on any future sex. How she longed to touch and hold him again, to feel his strong hands and sumptuous lips gliding over her body. There were so many things that they never got the chance to try...

Another vamp dropped down out of a tree and onto Spike's back.

With an "Ooomph!" Spike was knocked to the ground on his stomach. The two vampires descended upon him, managing to pin him.

Spike bucked and thrashed under them, attempting to throw them off. His eyes widened in fear when he couldn't budge them. The vampire on his back opened it's mouth wide and dropped down towards the back of Spike's neck. Spike cried out in frustration, rage and pain when he felt the vamp's fangs against his neck.

Dru was off the bench in a flash and raced to help her ex-lover. She tore the vamp off of his back and flung it with crushing force into a large tree, impaling it on a conveniently protruding branch, causing it to burst into a cloud of dust. It was a merciful end for a vampire who dared attempt to taste what she herself had marked primally as her own.

"Well, that was handy!" Dru quipped.

When she turned back to take care of the remaining vamp, she saw that Spike had already dusted it.

"Shit!" Spike was breathing hard. "Thanks, Dru. Don't know what's wrong with me tonight...It shouldn't have been that hard."

"Thank God, I was here. If anything happened to you..." she sniffed the air, smelling his blood. "One of them hurt you." She rushed over to him. There was blood running down the side of his neck. "You were bitten?"

"I think it's just scratched." Spike put his hand on his neck, it came away with a fair amount of blood. "Shit. Wish I could kill the son of a bitch again."

"Let me see." Dru examined his neck.

The smell and sight of his potent Slayer blood; the way he looked; her fear of him being hurt; her still deep, undying love for him; all of it combined to make her feel light-headed with lust. She needed to hold him, to taste him again. She pressed herself up against him and snaked out her tongue to lap at the deep scrapes on his tender throat. The taste of his blood made her tighten her grip on him and her eyes roll up, wetness gushed between her legs.

"Dru!" he gasped when he felt her tongue on him. "What--what are you doing?!"

His eyes fluttered shut, he couldn't help the involuntary shudder of desire that wracked his body.

"Shhh. It'll help it heal faster..." she whispered, continuing to lick his neck sensuously and grinding her hips slightly against him.

Her hand drifted down his chest to the button-fly of his blue jeans. She loved when he wore these kind of jeans. He looked so good, so delicious. She rubbed his bulge lightly, feeling it grow under her palm.

Spike was reeling. Seeing Dru again was difficult enough, but having her wrapped around him, holding him so close and so tight, licking his neck, it brought back a flood of memories both sweet and unbearably painful. He was lost to the sensations shooting through his body. Fights always made him hungry and horny, just like another Slayer that shall remain nameless.

Dru moved her mouth quickly from his neck to his lips, she kissed him zealously, thrusting her tongue between his parted lips.

Spike moaned. An image of Buffy suddenly popped into his head, snapping him out of the stupor he was in. His eyes flew open. He took Dru by the shoulders and held her away from him.

"Stop!" He backed away, running a hand through his hair. "We can't--I can't!"

Dru snapped out of her daze too, cursing herself for losing control, it was so easy to do around him. She rubbed her forehead, it was bumpy.

"Spike--I'm sorry. I--got carried away...I didn't come here to--I know it's too tempting with the curse--" Dru stammered in uncharacteristic uncertainty as she fought to maintain her human visage.

"It has nothing to do with that." He held the injured side of his neck.

"Oh? Then what is it?"

"I'm--with someone," Spike said looking away from her.

He had to tell her about Buffy. This wasn't going to be easy.

"You've got someone else? Not Sam?" Dru said with a touch of jealousy. "Anyone I know?"

He braced himself. "I'm seeing Buffy."

Dru looked behind her, misunderstanding him. Her brain couldn't comprehend any other meaning.

"Where?"

"No, Dru. Buffy and I are dating. Well, we haven't actually gone out on a real date yet, although having pizza with Mom and Dawnie could count--"

She stared at him incredulously. "You're joking? Spike, tell me you're joking."

"I'm not joking. I care for her. She loves me. We're together."

"Are you--insane?! Buffy!? Where do I even begin to list the reasons why it's wrong?"

"You sound just like Xander," Spike said, rolling his eyes.

"Well, Xander is 100% right! Wow, never thought I'd say that..."

"I don't need to be lectured by you too. I'm heading back home."

Spike turned and started walking away. Dru followed him.

"So everyone else is telling you the same thing? Hey, maybe there's a reason for that! Like you've taken a giant leap away from your good senses!"

"Leave me alone, Dru." Spike stopped and turned to her. "And it's really none of your business anymore, is it? You left me, remember? I can see anyone I choose to."

"I left you so you could have a normal life and you take up with Buffy? The original bad seed?"

Spike was getting aggravated.

"As I recall, you didn't give me a vote when you left 'for my own good'," Spike spat out as he made air quotes and continued, "which we both know is total bullshit! You left because you didn't want to be tempted into making love with me again. You couldn't handle it, so you took off."

"Did you fuck her?!" Dru grit her teeth.

"Again with the 'none of your business'. You don't really want me to answer that, do you?"

"How can you be so stupid? Not the sharpest knife in the drawer are you?" Dru was practically vibrating with rage.

The thought of Buffy daring to touch him made her borrowed blood boil in her veins. He was hers, she had marked him.

"Oh, yes! Druscilla the Wise speaks!" he said sarcastically. "Tell me the error of my ways, O Wise One!" He pursed his lips. "You don't think much of me, as a person, outside of the Slayer gig, do you? You can be so--fucking condescending! When you broke up with me, all that was missing was a little pat on the top of my head before you told me to toddle off."

"I love you. I'll always love you," she said roughly.

Spike's features softened slightly. "Part of me will always love you too. But it's over. You were my first love. But I'm not dead, Dru. I want to live and make my own decisions about my life."

"It's like you're spitting in my face! After the sacrif-"

"Don't say it! 'Your sacrifice'? You're just too noble for words. Sacrifice, my ass!"

"You're with her to get back at me? That's it, isn't it?"

He barked with laughter. "Ha! God, Dru, everything in the whole world isn't about you! The world doesn't revolve around you. Some people actually make decisions based on their own feelings, not on how it will affect you."

"Look who's talking! You're one of the most self-involved people I've ever met!" she struck back.

"Whatever, Dru," Spike said tiredly before turning to continue the walk home.

"She's a killer, Spike. You're going to be very sorry..."

"I'm a killer, you're a killer, she's a killer...wouldn't you like to be a killer too?" he laughed without humor. "She's trying to change her ways, Dru. And I'm going to help her."

"She can't change! She doesn't have a soul."

Spike stopped again and, turning to face Dru, threw his hands up in the air.

"You know what? I'm done with this conversation. I'm tired of having to justify making my own decisions to everyone. I'm going home. I think that you should go back to LA if you've finished your business in town. I mean, if you really did have another reason to be here besides dangling your wonderful self in front of my nose, just out of reach."

"I'm not going to let you make the biggest mistake of your life," Dru said dangerously.

"Is that a threat? What do you mean by that, exactly?" Spike narrowed his eyes.

"Damn it, Spike! What's wrong with you? Can't you see what a bad idea this is?" Dru said in exasperation.

"Go back to LA, Dru. You can't talk me out of this. You gave up any right you had to tell me how to live my life when you left. I'm with Buffy. You can't change that. And if you go near her..." he trailed off, an edge to his voice. "Just stay away from her. Goodbye, Dru. Have a safe trip."

He walked away at a brisk pace.

Druscilla watched him walk away, she yelled after him, "You stupid, stupid man! You want me gone? Fine! I'll go and I won't come back! Just don't come crying to me when the worst happens! Do you hear me?! She's going to hurt you!"

Spike kept walking.

Dru's shoulders slumped. "Why the hell did I come back here? Oh yeah, the penchant for torturing myself...keep forgetting about that," she mumbled, walking back to Willy's where she'd left her car.

She'd go back to LA and wait...wait for the inevitable call that would come. Spike would get his heart broken by Buffy somehow, some way, eventually...

Dru sighed. She knew, damn well, that despite what she'd said, she would come to him if he needed her, if he asked her to. She forgot just how young and naive he really was sometimes...


 

A little while earlier...

Buffy got impatient to see Spike. She had to apologize for getting bitchy with him. He was just trying to be a nice bloke and spend some time with his family. As much as she wished it were so, she couldn't monopolize all his free time.

She hurried to Revello Drive, hoping that he would talk to her. She knocked on the front door. Joyce opened it a moment later.

"Hello, Buffy." Joyce smiled.

"Hey, Joyce. Is your eldest around? I need to talk to him."

"He went for a walk a little while ago. Probably doing a little patrolling before bed. Is everything all right?"

Spike hadn't mentioned that he was taking a walk with Druscilla to Joyce. He knew that his mother would be worried if she knew his former lover was back in town.

"Yeah, fine. I just--wanted to see him."

"Maybe you can catch up with him," Joyce said helpfully.

"Yeah, I'll do that. Thanks. See ya, Joyce."

"Have a nice night, Buffy."

Buffy walked to the end of the yard. He couldn't have been on his way to see her, they would have passed each other. She sniffed the air for his scent. She smiled when she caught a faint whiff of his unique fragrance and started off in that direction.

Buffy was so focused on finding him and only him, that she missed the other familiar scent on the air. That of her dear old Grandsire.

She entered the park looking for him. She stopped short and the smile dropped off her face when she saw Spike and--Dru embracing, Dru was wrapped around him. Dru was humping against him like a bitch in heat while she had her face buried in his neck. One of Dru's hands cupped his bulge, rubbing and squeezing. And he wasn't resisting.

Buffy felt bile rise in her throat when Dru crushed her lips against Spike's. Buffy spun around with her hand over her mouth, willing herself not to vomit, and started jogging then running away from the gut-wrenching sight. Tears of pain and rage poured down her face. The urge to go back and rip them both apart with her bare hands was strong. But she kept running.

Buffy ran all the way back to the crypt. She tried her anger management technique:

"Calm blue ocean! Calm blue ocean! Calm blue o-OH SOD IT!"

She tilted her face up to the ceiling and let out an inhuman roar/shriek that would have frightened any creature within earshot, before proceeding to demolish the upper level of her crypt.


 

Chapter 6

Spike tossed and turned in bed. His run-in with Dru and the resulting argument had him feeling agitated and restless. But first and foremost, he missed Buffy. The slight indiscretion he'd had with Dru made him feel incredibly guilty. He had just lost his head for a minute with her. His body had remembered how wonderful her touch felt and went on autopilot, taking over his brain for a brief moment. But it was Buffy that he wanted to be with now. He was sure of it.

With a groan, he sat up and threw his legs over the side of the bed.

"I have to see her," he said, standing up to get dressed.


 

Buffy was sitting in her chair in front of her smashed television set, finishing another bottle of vodka. She wanted to get good and numb.

Spike walked in quietly.

"Hey."

She tensed when she heard his voice.

"I--uh--hope you don't mind me coming here so late...I wanted to--see you." He walked over to the chair. "What--what happened here?" he said looking at the mess. "Are you hurt? Did something attack you?!"

"I did it. Now, piss off. I don't want you here." She turned her face away from him.

"Come on, Buffy. Don't tell me you're still mad that I couldn't stay? I'm sorry, okay? Can't we just--get past this?"

Spike was surprised their fight angered her enough to destroy her home like this. Even her precious telly hadn't escaped her wrath.

Buffy clenched her teeth and stood up. "Why don't you go find Dru? Cause I'm not buyin' what you're sellin' anymore, pet," she spit.

She pushed by him to the refrigerator.

Spike's mouth was agape, his eyes wide with shock. 'Why did she say that? How did she know Dru was in town?'

"What--are you talking about?" he said slowly.

"I fucking saw you, so don't bother denyin' it or lying to me! Did you have a nice shag? Is she all evil and soulless again?"

"Buffy...I--"

"Don't! Just get the fuck out of my sight! You were playin' me all along and I was too stupid to see it." She laughed. "You couldn't have her, so you settled for ol' Buffy!"

"That's not true! I--really care about you. Let me explain, please!"

"Save it! I don't want to hear your bloody excuses!"

"God damn it, Buffy! Will you listen to me?!"

"Talk to my ass, my head's had enough!" Buffy dropped back into her chair, taking a large gulp of vodka.

"Dru showed up out of the blue. She asked me to take a walk, we were just talking."

"That's funny. It looked a lot more like dry humping and Frenching to me."

Spike sighed. "We got attacked in the park by two vamps, they got the best of me, I got hurt a little bit. Dru was just checking the marks on my neck when...things got out of hand."

"Ha! Is that what you call it? Looked like she had everything well in hand to me..." Buffy sneered and lowered her gaze to his groin.

"Look."

Spike moved his shirt collar to reveal a white bandage on the side of his neck. He peeled it down to show her two deep cuts.

Buffy felt a pang of concern but pushed it back down.

"So that grievous injury excuses you for sucking face with that bitch?"

"No!" Spike replaced the bandage and starting pacing back and forth. "That's not what I'm saying. Didn't you see when I pushed her away, when I put a stop to it?"

"Can't say that I did. You were pretty into it. Get out."

"Buffy...I'm so sorry you had to see that. I never meant for it to happen. It will never happen again, I promise. I stopped it as soon as I realized what was happening. Doesn't that count for something?"

"Fuck you and sod off, not necessarily in that order." She took another swig.

Spike's eyes burned with tears. "What can I do? What can I say? Tell me!"

He kneeled in front of her.

"When Dru was kissing me, I thought of you...that's what snapped me out of it. I don't want her, I want you. I swear, it'll never happen again. Please, Buffy..."

Buffy fought back her own tears. He looked so sincere. But she was hurting so bad.

"I don't care. I want you out of here. Don't come back...cause I can't take it."

Spike stared at her a moment then slowly stood.

"Okay...I guess--I did it again...I--I'm always fucking things up. I just did it a little quicker than usual this time..."

He walked to the door, dragging his feet. He opened the door and stood there in the moonlight.

"I'm sorry," he whispered then left the crypt.

The sound of the door closing was deafening, it sounded so final.

Spike's heart ached as he walked amongst the gravestones. The last few days had been a whirlwind of happiness and despair. Right now despair reigned supreme. He'd only walked for a minute or two when he had to sit down, his legs felt too rubbery, his stomach roiled, his chest felt constricted. He sat down on a stone monument, resting his elbows on his knees, he put his face in his hands, letting his tears of frustration and regret go. He'd ruined another relationship. He had hurt her so much. And everyone had been so worried about her hurting him...

"I'm crying again, great. God, I'm turning into a fucking wuss," Spike sobbed.


 

Buffy stayed in the chair for a few minutes after he left, thinking about what she had seen and what Spike had said about it. Despite her harsh words, she still loved him more than unlife itself. The thought of never being with him again, never touching him again, made her ill. More ill than seeing him and Dru together had made her. He really had seemed sincere when he told her she was the one he wanted. Could he really choose her over Dru?

Buffy decided to try to be adult about it. She knew she couldn't live without him in her life. She'd go find him and they'd have it out. She had questions that needed answering. She put on her duster and went in search of him.

It didn't take long at all to find him, he hadn't made it too far. He was sitting on a gravestone, looking completely miserable.

'Good.' Buffy thought. 'He should be miserable too.'

She walked up to stand beside him.

"Spike," Buffy said.

Spike looked up, he hadn't heard or sensed her approach, having been too wrapped up in his emotional turmoil.

"Hey..." He wiped at his eyes with the heel of his hand.

"You might as well have a big, flashing neon sign over your head saying 'Easy Pickings'. What with your neck wound and not paying attention to your surroundings..."

Spike shrugged. "Maybe I don't care."

"Well I do. So get your ass back in the crypt," Buffy said sternly, pulling him to his feet. "This doesn't mean I'm forgiving you. I just have some things to say to you."

Spike nodded and fell into step beside her.


 

Riley scribbled furiously on his notepad as he crouched down in his hiding place behind some trees. He had been so happy for a minute there. Seeing the Slayer blubbering like a baby was the funniest thing Riley had ever seen. Where was a video camera when you needed one? But then Buffy had to come along and had to make him stop. They had walked back to her crypt and went inside, together. They were definitely having problems, though. Samantha would be happy to hear that.


 

"Take off the bandage, let me see your booboo," Buffy said, throwing her duster on the chair.

Spike reached up and removed the bandage from his throat, tilting his head so she could see it better. Buffy stepped up to him, inspecting the wound. She touched the area around the scratches lightly with her fingertips. It was already starting to heal. Her mouth watered at the smell of his blood. She wanted to lick and suck on his throat something fierce.

"How--uh--did the nasties get the drop on you?" Buffy asked, trying to ignore her instincts.

"By literally getting the drop on me. I was fighting one when the other jumped out of a tree onto my back. They were able to pin me. I can't believe I let myself get in that position."

"And--Dru came to your rescue?" she asked, stone-faced.

"Yeah. She helped me out." Spike looked down.

"Good on her, then. At least she's good for something."

Spike sat down on the sarcophagus. "You said you wanted to--tell me some things?"

Buffy took a deep breath. "Yeah. Let's jump right to the million dollar question: Who do you pick? Me or Dru?" she asked, sticking out her chin.

"You," Spike said without a moment's hesitation. "I want you. Not Dru. Not anybody else. I'm crazy about you Buffy. I think about you all the time, when I'm not with you I'm wishing that I was with you...I'm so sorry I hurt you, baby. I'm so sorry..."

"Did you--call me--'baby'?" she asked, her heart would have raced at the term of endearment, if it were beating.

He blushed and smiled shyly. "Yeah...I guess I did. I know it's corny--"

"No...I--liked it. Say it again." She moved closer to him, looking deeply into his beautiful, cornflower-blue eyes.

He met her gaze. "I'm crazy about you, baby..." Spike said in a low, sexy voice.

Her breathing was getting more rapid, wetness pooled between her thighs. "You promise you won't let Dru or anyone else's lips near yours again? Are you mine? Only mine?"

Spike cupped her cheek in his hand, gently caressing her face. "I promise. I'm yours, only yours..."

Buffy threw her arms around him, then fused their mouths together. The kiss was desperate and claiming. She needed to plant her flag back in Mount Spike, as it were, to erase any icky Druscilla vibes. Speaking of Mount Spike...She pulled back, they panted for breath.

"You still have to make it up to me, Spike-pet."

"I'll do anything, Buffy. What can I do to prove how sorry I am? To show you how much you mean to me." Spike kissed a path up the side of her neck to her ear.

She had a few ideas about how he could begin...She'd soon see how serious he was about it. A devilish glint appeared in her eye.

"Anything?" Buffy asked.

He nodded in the affirmative.

"Come downstairs."

She pulled away from him, grinning from ear to ear.

Spike gulped at the sheer lasciviousness of her grin, wondering what it was that he'd just agreed to.


 

Two sets of handcuffs dangled from Buffy's fingers. Spike stared at them, agog.

"Well, pet? Up for it?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Um--I--uh--handcuffs?" Spike squeaked then cleared his throat.

"Is that a 'no'?"

"If--you want it--if it's--important to you...then I'll do it..." Spike said nervously.

He wanted to prove he meant what he said.

Buffy smiled. "Take off your clothes and lay on the bed, hands above your head."

He swallowed hard but did as she asked. Buffy licked her lips, her eyes roamed over his body as he stripped.

'Oh, this is going to be so much fun!' she thought with a grin.

He climbed on the bed and laid on his back. "Okay. What now?"

Buffy crawled up beside him.

"Hands above your head," she commanded.

He raised his arms and let out a shaky breath, his clear blue eyes were wide with trepidation. She took his wrists and secured a cuff to each one, then fastened the other end of the cuffs to a bar in the headboard.

"You can escape anytime you want. The cuffs aren't reinforced. You got that nifty Slayer strength an' all. So, no worries, right?"

"Yeah...no worries." Spike laughed nervously.

Buffy opened her nightstand and took out a handful of silk scarves, holding them up for him to see before she went to the end of the bed. She tied one to each of his ankles and then tied the end of the scarves to the bedposts. She stood back and surveyed her handiwork. Spike was now tied and cuffed to the bed, spread-eagle, looking at her dubiously.

"Is this--really necessary?"

"Quiet, Slayer! I'm giving the orders and I don't recall tellin' you that you could speak."

"Buffy?"

Spike was getting more nervous. Why was she being mean to him all of the sudden?

She sighed. "It's just a game, pet. I'm not really going to hurt you. Just play along."

"I--never did anything like this before..." Spike said uneasily,

"It'll be fun. You'll see." Buffy quivered in anticipation of being the first to introduce him to the wonderful world of bondage. "Pick a safe word."

"Safe word?"

"A word that you wouldn't normally use to tell me to stop if it gets too--intense."

"You'll--stop right away?"

"I promise, luv."

"Uh..." Spike's mind raced, trying to settle on a word. "Um--Farfegnuten!" he blurted out.

Buffy chuckled and nodded. "That's a good one. No chance of that poppin' up in conversation. Farfegnuten it is. Okay, if things get to intense for you, say that word and I'll stop and release you. Another thing, we're playin' a game here, Spike-pet. And in this game, I'm your Mistress, Mistress Buffy." She smirked. "Speak only when I ask you a direct question. If you need to ask me anything or address me, you need to call me Mistress, and ask for permission before speaking. Exclamations of pleasure, crying my name or your God's in pleasure are exceptions, you can feel free to let those out all you like. I'll address you as Slayer or Pet. Got it?."

Spike nodded dumbly.

"Remember, luv, don't get freaked out if I say harsh or just plain strange things, I'm going to be playing the part of Mistress Buffy."

Buffy didn't intend to be too harsh with him, this being his first time and all. She'd try to take it easy on him so she wouldn't totally wig him out. She took one more of the scarves, a lovely blue one to match his eyes, and started putting it around his head.

"Hey! What are you doing? I don't want a blindfold." Spike twisted his head away.

"Did you mean it when you said you'd do anything to prove your feelings to me? Or was it just bullshit to placate me, luv?" Buffy looked at him questioningly.

Spike sighed. "I meant it. But..." He saw the serious look in her eyes. This weird domination thing was important to her, so...he'd go along with it for now. "Okay...it's just...weird."

Buffy smiled and went about tying the scarf around his head, covering his eyes.

"There!"

She examined the tableau in front of her: Spike, her Slayer, spread-eagle and fastened to the bed, his toned, tanned, muscular body laid out in front of her like a buffet. She giggled.

"You look smashing, pet!" She wiped at a little drool off the corner of her mouth.

He was even more delectable then usual like this, all splayed out and helpless. It was going to be difficult not to just fuck his brains out.

"Yeah, I'll bet. I feel like an idiot. You had better NOT have a camera," Spike muttered.

"First of all, a camera's a really good idea, I'll have to get one for next time. Second of all, you did not ask for permission to speak."

"I didn't know we started. Are we starting now?"

"Spike...you're going to ruin this for me. The game starts...now."

"Now, now?" he asked.

Buffy growled. "You didn't ask for permission to speak. Am I going to have to punish you?"

"Punish? What do you mean--punish?" Spike asked getting worried again.

Buffy growled louder. "You bloody did it again! NO more talking!"

Spike opened his mouth to say something but wisely snapped it closed again.

"Good," Buffy said.

She went over to a box of toys she kept on hand for just such an occasion and placed it beside the bed. Next she went to get some ice cubes from her freezer and a candle.

"Um--Mistress Buffy?" Spike felt so stupid having to call her that. "Uh--what's going on? Where are you?"

Buffy smirked. "Right here, Slayer." She sat on the edge of the bed. "You didn't ask for permission to speak, but I'll let that one go, since you called me by my correct title."

She bent over and took a big, white ostrich feather from her box of goodies. Buffy trailed it lightly over his abdomen. Spike jerked at the new and strange sensation. She continued ghosting the feather over his torso, neck and face.

"Mistress Buffy? Can--can I speak?"

"Yes," she rumbled, getting extremely turned on.

"Is--is that a feather?"

"Yes. Do you like it?" she purred.

"Y-yeah. It's nice..."

Despite his misgivings about this whole thing, Spike was starting to get into it a little. The feather felt pretty damn good. Buffy had him totally at her mercy but he knew she wouldn't really hurt him. It was kind of...exhilarating to give up control to someone else for once.

Buffy smiled as she moved the feather down over his hipbones to his cock, ball sac and thighs. Spike groaned softly, his cock jumped slightly as the feather fluttered over his lower body. He sighed when she took the feather away.

Buffy dug back into the box, this time bringing out a leather cock ring. She wanted to get it on him before he started getting hard. She took his balls in her hands and slipped them, one ball at a time, through the ring.

"What--Mistress Buffy! Per-Permission to speak!" Spike pulled on the handcuffs.

"Granted," Buffy said, taking his shaft in her hand and putting it through the ring then fastening the strap.

"What is that!? What are you doing?!" Spike tried to keep from panicking.

He trusted her, but couldn't help being concerned when he felt something being put around his private parts.

"It's a cock ring, Slayer. It'll keep you harder longer and best of all, you don't get to cum until I want you to."

Buffy trembled, having this much power of him was a heady feeling.

Spike didn't know what to make of this. He'd never even seen one of the things he was currently wearing. He swallowed and willed himself to relax. Buffy wouldn't damage his equipment by putting something potentially dangerous on it, she enjoyed it too much. He nodded, clenching his jaw and breathing deeply through his nostrils.

Buffy got an ice cube and ran it over his lips. He parted his lips, the tip of his tongue poking out to soak up some of the moisture. She moved the ice cube down, over his chin, his throat and onto his chest. Buffy bent over and licked a trail from the hollow of his throat up to his lips, kissing him hotly for a few moments before pulling away. Spike panted. She got another cube and rolled it on one of his nipples.

Spike gasped, clenching his toes and balling up his hands into fists. He knew she was going to do that eventually, but the coldness was still a shock. Buffy repeated her action on the other nipple. After that cube was melted, she lit the candle she had brought over with her Zippo lighter.

"M-Mistress Buffy?" Spike said in a shaky voice.

He was both afraid and excited about what she would do to him next.

"Yeeessss?"

"What was that noise?"

Without responding, Buffy held the candle over one of his nipples, tilting it. Hot wax dripped on to his sensitive flesh. Spike inhaled sharply and arched off the bed. She repeated on the other nipple.

Spike hissed through clenched teeth, breathing harder. Buffy put the candle aside, picked up another ice cube and reapplied them to both his nipples, then dripped the wax on him again. The variations in temperature were driving Spike crazy. He gripped the bars of the headboard, trying not to cry out or say anything.

Buffy dribbled the wax in a line from the middle of his chest to his belly button. With her other hand she smeared the wax around. Putting the candle aside again, she got another cube and circled it around his navel before trailing it down through his pubic hair and along the length of his cock to the tip. She took his member in her hand and rubbed the slit with the remainder of the cube.

Spike whimpered and moaned.

With yet another cube, she made sure to go over every inch of his dick until it was glistening with moisture. Without letting go of him, she picked up the candle and dripped wax down the sides of his prick, the skin turned pinker where the wax touched. Buffy then dripped the wax onto the head, swirling it around with her thumb.

Spike bucked off the bed when he felt the hot wax drip down on his cock.

"Ngahhh! Ahhh!"

It was painful, but also very...stimulating. He had never felt anything like it. He was getting more aroused by the moment.

Buffy smiled slyly and pumped him a few times when she felt his cock twitching and growing harder in her hand. She knew the Slayer would get off on a little pain mixed with his pleasure, just like she did.

"Everything alright, Pet," Buffy asked, checking on him.

"F-fine!" Spike grit his teeth.

"Good."

Buffy gave his balls the same treatment: Using the ice then dribbling the wax.

"Jesus! Buffy!" Spike gasped and trembled.

Buffy smiled, blowing out the candle and putting it on her nightstand. She dug back into the box and brought out her self-heating, mango-flavored body oil then poured some out into her palm. She rubbed her palms together, making the oil heat up, then started rubbing it onto his shoulders and chest.

Spike sniffed. Whatever she was putting on him smelled like fruit.

"Smells nice..."

Buffy rolled her eyes. He just couldn't get the hang of the whole 'Ask permission to speak' thing. She'd have to chastise him a little. She took a small paddle out of the box and swiftly, but lightly, gave his cock a swat with it. Spike gasped loudly, arching his body off the bed.

"I told you, Slayer, you must ask before you speak unless I ask you a question," Buffy said sternly. "Understand?"

"Y-yes!" Spike stuttered.

That had definitely taken him by surprise. He kept forgetting the rules of her game. Why couldn't they just have sex like they usually did? He was good at that.

She caressed the side of his face for a moment before applying more oil to his body. Buffy massaged the warm oil all over his body: Arms, shoulders, chest, stomach, hips, thighs, calves and right down to the tips of his toes. She sucked on his toes for a minute of two, making him moan.

Nobody had ever paid any attention to his feet before. Spike never would have imagined that having your toes sucked on could feel so good, that it could be so hot. With what little brain power he had left to work with, he tried making mental notes about stuff he wanted to do to her the next time he had the chance. A little 'tit for tat' so to speak. His cock strained as he experienced the curious and exciting sensations Buffy was producing in him while thinking about having her tied up like this, doing delicious and naughty things to her body.

Buffy regretted not being able to get to his back and ass when he was in this position, but that could wait until another time. She kneeled between his spread thighs and got more oil on her hands, taking his balls in her hands, she caressed them, coating them with oil. Then she went about stroking his cock from root to tip, until it too was shiny and coated with the fragrant oil.

Spike was moaning, groaning and gritting his teeth as Buffy man-handled his balls and dick. He wanted to fuck her so bad, he wanted to cum so bad. When was she going to stop the game? He didn't know how much more he could take.

"How's that feel, Pet?" Buffy asked, running an index finger down his slick chest and abdomen.

"Buf-Mistress Buffy, when--is this going to be over?"

She smiled wickedly. "Soon," Buffy said, moving the finger she'd run down his chest further down, she tugged his balls lightly before continuing down, slowly stroking his perineum.

"Uhhhh! Oh God!" Spike moaned.

Buffy moved her slippery finger down again, circling his hole. Spike tensed up, breathing raggedly. She slid just the tip of her finger into his ass while she began stroking his cock with the other hand.

"Buffy! Ohh--Oh God! I--I don't want that!" Spike protested.

She could sense some curiosity on his part but she didn't want to do anything he really wasn't ready for. She removed her finger from his hole. That, too, could wait for another time.

"Alright, Slayer. But I think you'd find it...pleasurable."

She leaned over and pressed a kiss to the head of his cock, darting her tongue out to lick up the pre-cum that seeped out. She wriggled the tip of her tongue, toying with the slit.

"Ahhh! God! Ahhh!" Spike writhed under her, trying to buck himself up into her mouth.

"Want me to suck your cock, Pet?" she asked, continuing to lick over and around the bulbous head. He was getting as hard as granite.

"YES! Yes!" Spike panted. "Please!"

Buffy grinned then put her mouth over the head, sliding down his staff then bobbing her head up and down.

"Oh--God--Ohhh Buffy!" His hips bucked.

He groaned loudly and gasped for breath when she released his member.

Buffy got off the bed and took off her clothes quickly.

"M-Mistress? What's--where are you?" Spike asked shakily.

He was frustrated beyond belief that she stopped sucking him off.

Buffy went into the box one last time, to get her 8 inch long, black vibrator, or Maurice, as she sometimes called it.

"Right here, Pet." She crawled back onto the bed, kneeling between his legs again.

She parted her legs and switched on the vibrator.

Spike's head lifted slightly when he heard the buzzing sound. "Mistress?"

"It's a vibrator, Slayer. You look so good, so bloody hot...I have to get myself off." Buffy touched the vibrator to her clit and moaned.

"I--Permission to speak?!" Spike said in a high, tight voice.

"Mmmm--Granted," she breathed.

"What about--uh--me? Why--"

"You want to fuck me?" Buffy asked, moving the vibrator along her soaked gash.

"Yes! Oh God--YES!" Spike strained at his bonds.

Buffy smiled and put the vibrator to his lips.

"Taste." She was starting to pant.

Spike's tongue darted out, licking her juice off the sex toy.

"Buffy, so good...." he mumbled using that wonderfully long tongue of his to clean off the vibrator.

Buffy took it away from his mouth, if she watched him doing that any longer she thought she might cum without him even touching her. He was so fucking hot. She touched the vibrator to one of his nipples, circling and rubbing it. Spike groaned. She repeated the action to the other nipple.

Spike blinked rapidly when Buffy pushed the silk scarf above his eyes, allowing him to see again. They locked gazes. Buffy smirked, taking his rigid cock back in her hand, she lowered her mouth back over it, engulfing him once again in her cool, moist mouth. She ran the vibrator up and down the sides of his dick, sucking on it like a lollypop while she massaged his balls.

"Buffy! PLEASE! OH GOD! Want to CUM!" Spike looked down at her, a frantic and desperate look on his face.

He thrust up into her mouth, his hands wrapped around the bars above his head.

Buffy smiled around his cock and moved the vibrator down, running it over his sac then down to his hole, sticking just the very tip into his ass. If possible, he thrust even more frantically, gasping and crying out in pleasure and frustration. Buffy shuddered as a mini-orgasm washed through her body. Seeing him like this, having him like this was too decadent for words. She had to have that big, gorgeous, Slayer cock stuffed into her aching pussy right now, she couldn't play the game anymore.

Buffy took the vibrator out and moved to straddle his waist. She slid down onto his rock-hard cock like a hot knife slicing into butter, smoothly and effortlessly. They both gasped and moaned when he was fully encased in her snatch. He was even bigger and thicker than usual.

"YESYES! Ohh Buffy!" Spike thrust up.

Buffy groaned and tossed her head back as she rode him at a gallop, rubbing the vibrator over her clit. It only took a minute for her to scream in ecstasy.

"Sp-Spike! OHYESOHFUCKYES!" Buffy sucked in air and wailed, bouncing up and down on his cock as she came hard.

"BB-UUFFY! PLEASE!" Spike yelled, he'd never wanted or needed to cum so bad and not been able to.

Buffy released the strap on the cock ring. Almost immediately, Spike's entire body went stiff as a board, he arched his back off the bed and threw his head back, as he started cumming harder than he ever had. His eyes crossed then rolled up in their sockets.

"OH FUCKYESFUCKYES! AAGGHHH--BUFFY!" Spike howled and shook as he unloaded buckets of cum into her cunt.

Buffy dropped onto his chest, panting for breath, still humping against him. He kept cumming and cumming, losing all track of time, dark spots danced in front of his eyes, his eyelids flapped like window shades as he continued to cry out in sweet release.

Buffy's pussy was stuffed to overflowing with his cock and thick spunk. Their combined liquids pooled beneath them. She had cum again when she felt his cock spasming violently inside her.

The next thing Spike knew, Buffy was laying beside him on the bed, his arms and legs were free from their bindings, the scarf was gone from his forehead and the cock ring had been removed.

Buffy was breathing hard, her eyes were closed, a huge smile was plastered on her face.

"Buffy?" Spike rubbed at one of his sore wrists.

She turned her head and smiled at him. "Welcome back, luv. You decided to take a little nap."

"I passed out?" he asked, his eyes as big as dinner plates.

"A little bit. Thought I really did kill you for a moment there..." Buffy giggled.

"Wow...that was...holy shit!" Spike looked up at the ceiling, a look of awe on his face. "God--I never...that was fucking..." He looked back at her, goofy post-orgasmic grin firmly in place. "You're very talented..."

Buffy smiled widely and rolled against his side, running her hand over his slick chest. "You are too, Spike-pet...At one point I think you were actually speaking in tongues."

They laughed. She snuggled against her powerful, beautiful, passionate Slayer.

"Did I do okay? I never did anything like that before..." Spike asked self-consciously.

"Mmm, you need to work on following orders," Buffy laughed. "But you were wonderful, luv...so bloody wonderful."

She tilted her head up to press their lips together. He caressed the side of her face.

"Are we okay, now?" Spike asked, searching her eyes.

"Yeah. I--know you meant what you said. You have no idea how--I love you so much, pet." She swallowed the lump forming in her throat.

"I know." Spike gently kissed her forehead, eyes, cheeks and finally her mouth.

He was getting closer to realizing that he loved her just as much as she loved him. But there was still something that kept him from recognizing his deep love for her.

"Now, we really do need a shower." Spike chuckled and sighed.


 

Chapter 7

The days passed. Spike and Buffy got together every chance they got. Patrolling and then shagging each other's brains out, sometimes just holding each other for hours. Neither one had been so happy or had a relationship that felt so 'right'. Spike had managed to avoid Xander all week. He still wasn't ready to talk to his best friend, the things Xander said still stung too much.

Spike was working out after school in the training room at the Magic Box. Giles came in, pretending to inspect some weapons.

Spike sighed.

Somehow, he had avoided having 'the talk' with Giles all week too. The Watcher had been acting awkward all day. It was time to see what was on his mind, no matter how unpleasant it might be to talk about.

"Giles, what is it?" Spike asked hitting the heavy bag.

"Hmm?" Giles asked.

Spike stepped back from the bag and steadied it. "You've been acting strange all day. You've got something you want to talk about, right?"

"Erm, yes. I wanted to...talk to you about the Buffy--situation." Giles took off his glasses and polished them.

"The Buffy situation? I'm--with her Giles. I'm not taking a poll to see if everyone thinks I should be with her. It's my decision."

"I know that, Spike. It is ultimately your decision...But have you really thought this through? The potential for...I don't want you to get hurt," Giles said the last part quietly.

Spike's stance relaxed a bit.

"I won't get hurt. She loves me, I can see it in her eyes, and in the things she does for me and my family. I believe in her, Giles. I think that's all she needed all along. A little kindness and someone to encourage her to do good. She's special."

"Do you love her?" Giles asked, Spike flashed back to when his mom asked him the same thing.

"I love her as much as I'm capable of loving her."

"What does that mean?" Giles said, wrinkling his brow in confusion.

"It means that I'm 'damaged goods'. I--have trouble opening myself up to people. In case you hadn't noticed. After everything with Dru...the part of my brain able to fall in love got fried or something. Like with Sam. She's a great woman. Smart, beautiful, loving--she had it all. But I couldn't love her. Something's missing inside of me."

"And Buffy somehow fills this void?"

Spike smiled. "Yeah. It's about 3/4 full now. I still can't tell her, honestly, that I'm in love with her...but I think that someday I will."

"Buffy's a vampire. There are going to be--rough spots. She doesn't have a soul, Spike. She has no moral compass."

"She's capable of more love and affection than most humans I've met or even heard of. She loves me and I know she's crazy about Dawnie and Mom. You should see Buffy when she's around them...I think it's because they both always treated her like a person, not a thing. I never gave her the benefit of the doubt before, not like they did. Can you guys try to treat her like--one of us? I know she'd be chuffed to bits to feel accepted by the gang."

"Chuffed to bits?" Giles couldn't help smiling at Spike's use of British slang.

Spike smiled and laughed. "I guess she's rubbing off on me a little. It just slipped out."

"What about your future? You don't want to raise a family?"

"Giles, get real. Do many Slayers get old enough to bounce their chubby grandchildren on their knee, telling them tales of demons they've slayed? I'm not going to live that long...you know that."

Giles took a deep breath. He didn't like this relationship at all. There was too much potential for heartbreak and mayhem. But Spike seemed so happy since they've been together.

"I don't approve, Spike."

Spike hung his head despondently, pushing lightly on the punching bag, swinging it back and forth.

"But--I don't want to alienate you by trying to talk you out of it at every turn. You're--important to me, very important, as is your happiness. It's not the exact same situation of course, but in my younger days I dated a few girls that my parents absolutely hated. I know how their bad-mouthing of my dates affected me. I was even more determined to see the ladies in question, just to spite them. So, I'll not lecture you about her or try to stand in your way....if that's what you really want."

Spike smiled at Giles. "Thanks. I really appreciate that you're trying."

Spike fought the impulse to give Giles a big hug.

Giles was so conflicted. It was a terrible idea for the Slayer and a vampire to be involved. A union against nature itself. It was one thing with Druscilla, at least she had a soul.

"Spike...if she hurts you..."

"Giles, she won't. Trust me. She's like a whole different person now. She still has her edge, but she's also so thoughtful and kind and loving..."

Giles nodded, even though he had strong reservations. But you couldn't talk Spike out of something once he'd put his heart into it.

Spike looked at the clock.

"Shit. I have to get home," he said, unwinding the athletic tape from his knuckles. "It's another fabulous Summers' family fun night."

"What's the movie tonight?" Giles asked.

Spike grimaced. "Sleepless in Seattle. I'm outnumbered by women. My suggestions for what videos to rent are met by 'Ewww!'s or 'That's too violent!'..." Spike said in a high-pitched voice.

Giles smirked. "You have my pity, sir."

Spike discarded the tape in the trash and picked up his gym bag.

"See ya, Giles. Thanks again, for the--for what you said."

Giles nodded. "Have a good evening, Spike."

Spike went out the back door. Giles looked after him. He really did hope that Buffy was everything that Spike claimed. Lord knows what would happen if this was some kind of game to her. Giles knew one thing for sure, if Buffy dared to toy with Spike's heart or hurt him in any way, Ripper would pay her a visit.


 

Buffy moped around the crypt. Tonight was the Summers' family night, the one night she couldn't spend time with Spike. She was greedy, she knew it. But she wanted him with her, making love to her, touching her, holding her.

Spike had suggested that she use this night to do 'her own thing'. Go shoot some pool, have a few drinks at Willy's, play some poker. She had been a bit of a homebody since she and Spike got together. Only going out to get blood and smokes (she'd had to cut down to half a pack a day due to spending so much time with the non-smoking Slayer). She could also use a good brawl or two. It wasn't a bad idea.

Buffy put on her duster and left for Willy's as soon as the sun set, intending to have a good time, maybe get in on a poker game in the back room. She lit up a smoke as she strutted through the cemetery.

Riley watched her leave from his hiding place. He gulped. It was time to put the next part of Sam's plan into action. He was scared shitless that Buffy would catch him. As soon as she was gone, he raced for the crypt, moving inside and closing the door swiftly. He walked to the refrigerator, remembering his conversation with Samantha last night...


Last night...

Sam handed Riley a small bottle of clear liquid.

"What's this for?" Riley said looking at it.

"Your job is to put that in something that you know Buffy will want to drink. A bag of blood in her refrigerator, a whiskey bottle...But it has to be something already in her crypt. I don't want her getting suspicious, like she would if you just came up to her and gave her a drink. She can't know where it came from."

"What's it do? And where did you get it?" Riley said nervously, his hand shaking a little.

He didn't want to hurt Buffy. Not much, anyway.

"I got it from some--friends of mine in the government. It's a sex drug. It'll get her in the mood real quick. That's where you come in, again. You just happen to stop by when she's getting amorous. The two of you rut like weasels, Spike finds out, and it's 'game over'." Sam smiled, pleased with her cunning plan.

"But Spike and Buffy don't see each other on Thursdays. The whole stupid family night thing, remember?"

"Pffft! Those two can't keep their hands off each other for one minute, let alone the whole night. It's disgusting...He'll show up eventually. You make sure you're showing her a 'good time' when he does." Sam waved away his question and tossed her long, wavy brown hair over her shoulder.

"How am I going to get this in the crypt? What if she catches me?!" Riley shuddered to think what Buffy would do to him.

"Hello? You've been monitoring her movements for a week. You know when she typically goes out and how long she's gone. Just wait until she leaves the crypt tomorrow night. Then move in, complete the mission, then get back out. Then, you wait until she comes back, give her about 15 minutes or so to ingest the laced drink and move in. Say--you left something that belongs to you there and you came back for it."

"What if she doesn't believe me? What if--"

"Will you shut up?!" Sam took a deep breath. She still needed Riley's help and needed to watch her temper with him, for now. "Look, it will be okay. I'll--be hanging around the cemetery. Just in case you need me to help if she catches you and gets violent. I'll incapacitate her."

Sam had no intention of doing any such thing, but she figured that that would calm his nerves.

Riley smiled tentatively. "Okay...You promise? You'll come if she catches me?"

"Absolutely," Sam lied with a smile.


The present...

Riley opened the refrigerator and took out the lone bottle of vodka. Buffy always liked to have a few swigs of this when she came home. He took a calming breath, trying to steady his hands, as he poured the contents of the bottle Sam gave him into the vodka bottle. He put the empty drug bottle into his jacket pocket, screwed the cap back onto the vodka and placed it back in the mini-fridge, exactly how he had found it.

Once it was done, Riley let out shaky laugh. He did it! He didn't spill it or anything! Samantha would be proud of him. He raced out of the crypt and back to his hiding place to wait in anticipation for Buffy to return.


 

Buffy hummed a tune as she walked in the door of the crypt. It had been a good night. She'd thrown back more than a few pints with some fellow demons, played a few hands of poker, winning $50 and best of all she forgot how much she missed Spike. But now she just reminded herself of it.

"Bollocks! I was doing so bloody good..."

Buffy strolled over to her fridge to get a little more liquid refreshment. Spike didn't like her to drink too much. It was hard, being in love, you had to compromise and change little things that annoyed the other person. But he was worth it. No amount of booze or cigarettes could make her feel as high or feel as satisfied as being with him did. She smiled, musing that she was helping him to loosen up a bit more and be more spontaneous. He was getting quite good at sex games as well. She twisted the cap off and took a long draught as she strolled over to her chair.

It was nice of Spike to help her buy a new tv after she busted up the last one in a fit of jealous rage. She didn't know what she'd do if she missed Dawson or Passions. Buffy flipped through the channels stopping when she came to reruns of 'Melrose Place'.

"Oooh! I love that Michael bloke! Now, he's evil!" Buffy settled in to watch, pulling steadily on her bottle.


 

Riley was scared. But after 15 minutes, he was standing in front of Buffy's crypt, screwing up his courage to enter.

'You can do it! You can do it! She'll be your very own Platinum Baby again after this...'

He opened the door and entered. When Buffy heard the door open, a huge smile lit up her features.

'He came!' she thought the Slayer had ducked out a little early and came to play.

She whipped around in the chair. Her smile fell when she saw Riley standing there.

"What the fuck are you doin' here?" Buffy stood up, scowling at him.

"Hi, Buffy! I--uh--I'm sorry to interrupt, but I left my--Best of Shania Twain CD here--somewhere. Can I--look around for it?"

Buffy grumbled, "I s'pose. But you find it an' get out."

"Sure! I--won't be long..." Riley's eyes darted to the half empty bottle in Buffy's hand then back to her face.

'She's drinking it...I wonder how long it will take to work?'

He made a show of looking around the crypt.

Buffy sat back down to watch tv. "I din't see your soddin' CD. I don't think it's here."

"Really? Just--let me look around a little longer."

"Whatever." Buffy waved her hand at him. "Just keep it down. This is the 'Melrose' where Kimberly steals Joe's baby. Bloody good episode...That Kimberly's one barmy bitch..."

Riley was running out of places to look after a few minutes. "Buffy?"

"What?" Buffy growled.

"Can I look downstairs? Maybe I left it there."

"NO. You may not go down there." She stood up and faced him. "Just leave, will ya? I'll give you the bloody money to buy a new CD for--"

A wave of dizziness passed over Buffy, she started swaying on her feet. She put her hand to her forehead, the vodka bottle slipped from her fingers and bounced off the floor before rolling away a few feet.

"Buffy!" Riley ran over and put his arms around her to keep her from falling. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah....I'm--fine. Bit too much o' the grape tonight..." Buffy sniffed Riley's neck, a drunk smile on her lips. "Mmm, pet, you smell so good..."

Riley's eyes widened. He had almost forgotten about the drug.

"Yeah?" he squeaked as she nuzzled him.

"Oh yeah...Is it hot? Are you hot?" Buffy asked with a puzzled frown, pulling at her clothes.

She knew something was wrong, but couldn't think hard enough to figure it out. Her skull felt like it was packed with gauze.

"A little bit..." Riley stared and licked his lips as Buffy pulled her shirt over her head and threw it on the floor.

She bent over and unlaced her boots, kicking them off. She almost lost her balance, but Riley was there again, grabbing her around the waist.

"Ooooh! Luv! You're so strong." Buffy felt his biceps and giggled. "I still have my pants on..." She looked at him, batting her eyelashes. "You still want to get in my pants, ma petite creme brulle?"

"Oh, Blondie Bear! French!" Riley smashed their lips together. Then lifted her up into his arms. "I missed you so much, baby!"

"Mmm, fuck me, Riley!" Buffy yelled, tossing her head back. "Oh God, I need you to fuck me! Please!" Buffy's body felt like it was on fire, her pussy ached and throbbed.

Her only thought was: MUST FUCK!

Riley grinned like a madman and headed to the lower level with his woman writhing in lust in his arms.


 

Spike was helping his mom with the dishes after the movie, he was feeling distracted. He couldn't stop thinking about Buffy. She was so disappointed that the two of them couldn't get together on family night.

"Spike?" Joyce asked.

"Hmm?"

"Honey, would you like to go see Buffy?" Joyce smiled knowingly.

"Huh? Uh--It's okay. I'll stay and help you."

Spike blushed a little at being caught thinking about his girlfriend when he was supposed to be helping his mother.

"Nope. You're useless to me like this. Go on, go see her. You've been drying the same dish for 5 minutes." She laughed.

"Oh...sorry. You--really don't mind if I--" he jerked a thumb in the direction of the front door.

"I told you, go on!" Joyce snapped a dish towel at his butt.

He laughed and yelped.

"Thanks, Mom." Spike kissed her cheek. "You're the best!"

"And don't you forget it!" Joyce laughed as Spike jogged to the front door.

She had to admit, being with Buffy really seemed to suit her son. He hadn't been nearly as moody as he was before they became an item. In fact, he was happy. He almost always had a smile on his face. Joyce didn't want to contemplate what it was that Buffy did to keep that smile in place, she was just glad to see her son happy. Whether he knew it or not, the boy was in love. Head over heels in love. She smiled and went back to the dishes.


 

Spike walked into the crypt with a red rose in his hand to give to Buffy. He had clipped the rose from the bush on the side of the Summers' house just for her. He was thinking about all that mushy, romantic stuff all the time anymore. The tv was on, so she had to be here somewhere. He was heading for the trap door when he noticed her clothes laying on the floor. Spike grinned, bending over to pick them up.

'Maybe she had a feeling I'd find a way to come and see her and is waiting for me...The vixen!'

Spike went quickly to the trap door and down the steps, he turned the corner and stopped. Buffy and Riley were going at it on the bed, on their bed. Spike stared at them, his brain not able to grasp what his eyes were seeing, the rose fell from his numb fingers, landing at his feet. Buffy was on top, riding Riley's cock like a pro. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion for him.

"OOOOHH! Yeah, Riley! Oh fuck--Oh baby!" Buffy moaned.

"Buffy! OH! Blondie--UHHH--Bear! I love you!" Riley shouted.

Spike felt like he was going to be sick. He started backing away, feeling the wall beside him to guide him to the stairs, he trampled the rose under the heel of his boot. He couldn't take his eyes off the spectacle on the bed.

"Love you too! OH GOD YES! FUCK ME!!" Buffy growled, bouncing up and down and clawing at Riley's chest.

Spike turned and ran to the upper level and out of the crypt. He kept running for a minute before having to stop, clutching at his stomach. He leaned against a gravestone for support. His mind was racing faster than his heart.

"How could you do this to me?" Spike whispered. "How could you?!" he said louder. "My God...such a fool...I'm such a FUCKING FOOL!"

He punched the stone monument, breaking it in half and sending stone chips and dust flying everywhere. He was so full of rage and sorrow that he wanted to go back there and tear them apart, piece by piece. His heart felt like it had been fractured into millions of pieces. He would never, ever, let himself get close to anyone again.

Spike took a deep, shaky breath. He looked around the cemetery, searching for something to kill, something to maim and beat to a bloody pulp. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hoped that maybe some vamp or demon would have their 'one good day'. Anything to make the immense pain stop. He set off in search of some baddies, rubbing his hand absently over his chest. His knuckles were bleeding from when he punched through the tombstone. But his heart hurt much more.


 

Xander walked nervously through the cemetery. Joyce told him Spike went to Buffy's for the evening a few hours ago. Xander couldn't eat, he couldn't sleep--he missed his friend. He hated Buffy, but if it meant losing Spike as his friend...he could learn to tolerate her. Spike's friendship meant too much to him to let it end. And Anya had oh-so-delicately pointed out that Xander, himself, was involved with someone who had done their share of mayhem over the last several centuries. It would be hypocritical for him not to at least give Buffy a chance.

Xander breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Spike sitting on a bench with his back to him. He approached him cautiously, he didn't want Spike to mistake him for a demon, but then again, maybe Spike would be more inclined to kill if he knew it was Xander after the exchange they'd had in the Magic Box last week.

"Hey, your mom said you'd be around here, so..." Xander walked around the bench to face Spike. "Look man, I'm really sorry about--"

He stopped when he took in Spike's appearance. He was bruised and literally covered in blood (some of it his own) and he had a kind of vacant look on his face--like he wasn't 'all there'.

"Spike?"

Xander moved closer to examine his friend: There was a rip in Spike's shirt around the midsection, revealing a deep cut across his stomach; A large gash was on his forehead above his left eye; His bottom lip was split; Blood ran from his nose; One eye was purplish and almost swollen shut.

"Shit! Jesus--God! What did this to you?" Xander panicked looking at his friend and then looking around them at the silent cemetery, afraid that whatever had done it was still running around.

He'd never seen his best friend looking worse than he did right now. The mere thought of what could have done this to this to the strong, resourceful, powerful Slayer, shook Xander to the core. Maybe it was Glory...

Spike shrugged disinterestedly.

"Spike? Are you okay?"

Spike looked at him, his eyes seeming to finally focus on Xander's face.

"No," Spike without emotion, his face a blank canvas.

"Come on, let's get you home, buddy." Xander took one of Spike's arms and put it over his shoulder then hefted him off the bench, Spike was like dead weight. "You gotta help me here, a little. You been putting on weight lately? Too many milkshakes?" Xander joked nervously.

Spike started moving his feet on his own. They shuffled/stumbled out of the cemetery to Xander's waiting car.


 

Joyce had screamed and almost fainted when she had seen the condition her eldest child, her only son, was in. Joyce, Xander and Dawn had fretted over him and patched his wounds as best they could before putting him to bed. His wounds were bad, but not fatal: His face was a mess, bloodied and bruised; There was a gash across his stomach, something had sliced him open; Bruises and scratches dotted his torso; Ugly, angry looking, purplish-yellow bruises surrounded a few cracked ribs; His hands were torn up, a few nails had been ripped off. The Slayer healing mojo had it's work cut out for it but it should be able to take care of him.

Xander entered Spike's bedroom quietly, he didn't want to wake him up if he was sleeping. But Spike's eyes were wide open, or rather, the one that wasn't swollen shut was open. He was staring at the ceiling. Joyce had asked Xander to talk to him, to try to get any details about what happened tonight out of him. Spike had barely said a word when they were bandaging him up. He only mumbled something about a lot of vamps. It crossed Xander's mind that maybe Spike and Buffy had been attacked by a group of somethings and Buffy had gotten killed. Maybe that was why Spike was in a state of shock. Xander would be as gentle as possible.

"Hey, man." Xander closed the door behind him and walked over to the bed then sat down on the edge. "How you feelin'?"

The Slayer looked like a prize fighter who'd gone about 50 rounds with Mike Tyson.

Spike's good eye focused on him.

"Like shit," he said through his busted lip.

"Yeah, I guess so. Any better yet? Those super fast, super cool Slayer healing abilities kicking in?"

Spike only stared at him, not really seeing him.

"Spike...what happened, man? What did this to you?"

Spike looked away from him and towards the window. "I went looking for trouble. I found some. They kicked my ass, I kicked theirs. I walked away. They didn't."

Xander furrowed his brow. "Huh?"

"I went looking for demons. That's what I do, isn't it? That's all I do...I found a lot of them. I sent them back to Hell where they belong."

Xander got even more worried when Spike started laughing, sounding like a mental patient.

"They couldn't do it, though. I gave them a perfect opportunity, I wasn't even trying that hard...I left myself wide open and they still lost."

"Again, with the Huh?" Xander said.

"One good day...they didn't have it." Spike's eye teared up. "Why couldn't they beat me? I wanted them to fucking beat me...just this once..."

"Wha--Spike...Are you saying that you were trying to get yourself killed?" Xander asked in horror.

"It's too hard, Xan. It's too hard...I can't do it anymore...Why can't the pain just go away?"

Tears welled up in Xander's eyes. "Why? Why do you want to die?"

Spike turned away again, his face contorted in pain. "You were right...Oh God, why didn't I listen to you?"

"What was I right about? Come on, Spike! What the fuck happened to you?!"

"Buffy," Spike sobbed her name in barely a whisper.

Xander ground his teeth together. 'I fucking knew it! That bitch! What did she do to him?!'

"What happened?" Xander asked slowly.

"I--caught her...Oh God, I saw them together...fucking...she told him she loved him while they...just like she told me...I'm such a fool! I believed her...I really believed her! How could I have been so wrong? I was so sure about...how much she loved me...How could I not be enough for her?! We had sex *ALL* the time!"

"Maybe...vamps just--define love differently than we do..." Xander struggled to keep calm and find the right words to comfort his friend. "Maybe they can love someone--but still--uh--want to sleep with other people."

Spike sobbed, "It--hurts so much...I just want it to stop..."

"I'm sorry..." Xander held Spike's hand. "I am so sorry."

"I should have listened to you...you knew...you fucking knew..."

"The heart--wants what it wants...I understand that. You took a chance. You followed your heart."

"Well, you can rip the fucking thing out of my chest...I don't need it anymore...don't want it...Finish the job Buffy started..."

Xander took Spike by the shoulders, forcing him to look him in the eye. Spike tried to roll away from him, but Xander held him in place.

"Hey! I'm sorry she did this to, I am. But what's this trying to get yourself killed shit?! Did you forget about your friends? Did you forget about your Mom and Dawn? What would we do if you got yourself killed? What kind of shit is that?!"

"Leave me alone!" Spike spit out.

"No! I won't."

Xander shook Spike's shoulders firmly, but gently, he wanted to get his point across but didn't want to aggravate his injuries. Spike tried twisting away but Xander's grip was too strong. He bared his teeth like an animal and glared up at Xander.

"What about Dawn? You're supposed to protect her. What's going to happen to her if you're not around to protect her from Glory if she comes a' callin'? Huh?! You think Giles or Joyce can fight her? Snap out of it Spike! You don't give up, damn it! You never give up! That's one of the things I've always admired most about you. No matter what life throws at you, no matter how much you get beat down, you get back up, dust yourself off and you KEEP GOING! I admire the hell out of you...you're my hero... Please, Spike, please snap out of this!"

Spike watched the progress of a single tear that leaked out of the corner of Xander's eye, following it with his good eye as it ran down his friend's face. Suddenly, everything came back into focus in his mind, the nearly catatonic, reckless/suicidal state he'd been in for the past several hours dissipated. He knew that Xander was right. The fog was finally starting to lift from his brain.

"Xan...I could've died tonight...I wanted to die tonight," Spike said in shock, realizing what he'd almost done. "Oh fuck...I'm so messed up..."

"It'll be okay. You just need to heal. You'll be alright." Xander released Spike's shoulders and sat back on the bed, once again taking Spike's hand in his.

Xander took a shaky breath and wiped at his wet face with his free hand. He was so thankful that Spike appeared to be 'back'. He saw the light come back on behind Spike's eyes a moment ago, as if a switch had been flipped back on, restoring his mind to full capacity.

"Oh God, why does it have to hurt so much?" Spike asked miserably.

The pain was wrapped around him like a shroud. It was hard to draw in a breath.

"I don't know...Betrayal hurts...especially when it's someone you--trusted. You aren't going to try--you aren't going to hurt yourself are you?"

"No." Spike looked ashamed. "Xan, don't tell my Mom or Dawn about what I said. We can just say that I ran into a bunch of demons and they got a few good ones in...okay?"

"Sure...just as long as you will be alright."

"You know what the worst part is?" Spike asked.

Xander shook his head 'no'.

"The worst part is...that I'm sure now. I love her...I love her so much...when I saw them...it hit me like a ton of fucking bricks."

"God Spike, I'm--I'm so sorry..." Xander shut his eyes tightly. Then he continued in a soft voice, "Are we--cool again? I missed you, man."

Spike's mouth twitched up into a weak smile.

"Yeah, we're cool. I missed you too."


 

Chapter 8

Buffy awoke with a groan. Her head was throbbing and her mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton. She smiled despite her physical discomfort when she felt a body next to hers.

'Spike must've come over in the middle of the night and gotten into bed with me...Shoulda woken me up, the bad boy...' She rolled over and put her arm over his chest.

"Mornin', luv," Buffy said with her eyes still closed, rubbing her cheek against a solid, male chest.

"Mmm...Mornin' Blondie Bear." Riley kissed the tip of her nose.

Buffy's eyes shot open. Riley's big, smiling, roast beef of a face was looking down on her.

"Gah!" Buffy propelled herself backwards, falling off the bed and onto the floor on her butt.

She sat there stunned. Trying to think back to last night, frantically trying to recall how this could have happened.

"What's the matter, Buffy? Did you drink too much again?" Riley asked peering over the edge of the bed at her. "You've really got to cutting down on the booze, Nummy."

"What the bloody, sodding..." Buffy grabbed a discarded bed sheet, and wrapped it around her nude body. "How the fuck did this happen?! I never would have--Oh God!" she panicked, getting up and pacing back and forth.

"I came over to--" Riley paused, trying to recall what it was that he had said he was looking for. "Over to find my...CD, and...well...you made it clear that you wanted me. Don't tell me you don't remember."

"I bloody don't! I--The last thing I remember is--you coming in the crypt...and 'Melrose Place'...Oh God, what have I done?!" Buffy put her head in her hands.

She knew that if Spike found out about this...it would all be over. She couldn't fathom how she could have gotten drunk enough to--do what she did. And with Riley of all people. Spike couldn't find out. What if he came in, right now? She looked at her clock for the time, it was 4:30 in the afternoon.

"Get dressed and get out of here! Now!" Buffy shouted.

Spike usually came over after school, he could be here any second.

"But--Blondie Bear--the sun's up. I can't--" Riley felt tears stinging his eyes.

She was rejecting him, again.

"Leave through the tunnels! Hurry!"

Buffy felt a little bad for Riley, even though he was a pain in the ass. She knew what it was like to care about someone significantly more than they cared about you.

"Look, I'm sorry, Riley...It was a mistake, last night. If I wasn't ass over tits drunk, I never would have slept with you or anyone else...I'm in love with someone."

"That stupid Slayer!" Riley jumped up and starting putting on his clothes. "It's always him, isn't it!? It'd be a real shame if he found out--"

Buffy cut him off, "He will never hear about this. If you say one bloody word to him, or anyone else, about this..." Buffy said dangerously, leaving the threat hanging in the air.

Riley smiled, inwardly. He knew that he wouldn't have to. He'd felt the Slayer's presence in the room with them at one point while they were fucking. Buffy must have been too drugged up to notice. Riley had been frightened for a minute or two, worrying that the Slayer might get violent, but Spike had just left without saying or doing anything. He probably ran off somewhere, crying like a little girl again. Riley mentally guffawed, wishing he could have seen that.

"I promise, he won't hear it from me...I won't say a word to anyone," Riley said, stone-faced.

"See that he doesn't. I'm going to take a shower. Be gone when I get back." She started to turn away, then paused. Then she said in a softer, kinder tone, "Go to your precious, sodding France, leave Sunnydale. Get on with your unlife, Riley. You're just settin' yourself up to be hurt, hangin' around me, hoping we can be together...I'm in love with Spike. He's the only one who will ever be in my heart."

Buffy hurried to wash the sweat and smell of sex from her body.

'We'll see who gets hurt, Buffy. Yes, we will...'

Riley finished dressing and made his way through the tunnels, heading for Willy's for a few drinks before going to Sam's apartment to let her know that everything went according to her plan. She was so smart.

The crushed rose laid on the floor in the shadows by the stairs. Buffy wouldn't notice it until much later.


 

The next day, the Scoobies gathered at the Summers' home. Xander called the rest of them to tell them about 'the incident' and they had come right over to see Spike for themselves. They all had been horrified at his physical state. Xander had whispered what happened to each of them as they arrived, what had happened with Buffy and Spike's utter despair about it. But Xander left out the suicidal Spike part of the story, only telling that bit to Giles. He figured that the Watcher had a right to know what his Slayer's mental state had been. Even though Xander was getting confident that Spike wouldn't go there again, he didn't want to remain silent, just on the off-chance that Spike decided that life wasn't worth living again. Xander wouldn't be able to handle the burden if something happened to Spike because he didn't tell anyone.

Anya had come by earlier, but being the conscientious sales clerk that she was, she left to run the Magic Box leaving Giles free to spend time at the Summers'.

Joyce had been adamant about staying home from work to look after him, but the others were able to convince her to go in. They would tend to him until she got back in the evening. She had reluctantly gone to the gallery, but called home every hour or so to check on him.

Dawn stayed home from school. She had been unable to go back to sleep after Xander brought Spike home. She could have lost her brother last night. She nearly had and it shook her badly. Dawn had never seen him look like that before. She knew that Spike's slaying duties were dangerous, but he was so good at his job that the baddies never got the best of him, not like this. It hit home again just how easily her bossy, sometimes pig-headed, but overall sweet and loving brother could be taken away from her. Dawn didn't know what she would do without him.

She bustled about the house, doing anything and everything she could think of to keep busy: Making food for the others; Bringing Spike drinks and some soup; Fluffing up and bringing Spike more pillows, and putting Grandma Summers' quilt on Spike's bed; Dusting and cleaning the windows, etc.

Willow and Tara sat at the dining room table with some spell books and components, fixing herbal remedies and preparing a few spells to help accelerate Spike's healing. They too, had been worried sick when they saw Spike.

Giles went to Spike's bedroom to talk to him about what happened. He had to make sure Spike was really in his right mind again.

"Spike?" Giles stuck his head into the bedroom.

"I'm bored," Spike said, looking restless.

His wounds were healing more slowly than usual, but there had been some improvement. Spike's eye wasn't quite as swollen; the bruises on his face were bright yellow with some dark spots, instead of just dark and purple.

"Can't I get out of bed?" Spike asked.

Giles came into the room, shutting the door behind him then went over to stand by the bed.

"Out of the question. You have a lot more healing to do first."

"What about a tv? I got nothing to do. I'm going stir-crazy just laying here."

"I'll see about getting a tv brought in for you..." Giles said, staring at Spike.

"What?" Spike had a hunch he knew what was on the Watcher's mind.

"Xander told me," Giles said simply.

Spike looked away, feeling embarrassed and guilty. He hadn't wanted anyone else to know how low he had sunk last night. Especially not Giles. His Watcher was probably ashamed and disappointed in him, even more so than he was of himself.

"I asked him not to..." Spike whispered.

"He did the right thing by telling me. I'm your Watcher, Spike. I think I should be privy to the fact that my Slayer was suicidal. And...more than anything, I'm your friend. I care about you." Giles struggled to keep the volume and tone of his voice steady.

"I--went mental for a little while...I did some stupid things...but I'm better now. You don't have to worry about me going off the deep end like that again."

"I do worry about you, Spike. Are you certain that you won't--regress?"

"Yes. Xander helped me get my head screwed back on straight. My brain kicked in again when he reminded me about you guys...and Dawn. I saw how much it was hurting him to see me...It's scary, I really was out of my mind..." Spike ran a bandaged hand through his hair, letting out a ragged breath. "I can't believe I lost my shit like that..." he trailed off.

"Buffy was unfaithful to you..." Giles said gently. "I'm truly sorry, Spike. I know you were very--fond of her."

Spike pushed down the tears that started to build anew in his eyes. "I'm in love with her, Giles...Great time to realize it, eh? I have terrific timing. I--I don't know what to do...How could she--do this to me? It hurts so fucking much."

"I--don't know why..." Giles closed his eyes, trying to retain his composure.

The pain evident on Spike's face and in his voice were gut-wrenching. Buffy almost destroyed him. It was ironic--she had failed so many times in the past when she had been actively trying to kill him and last night she had almost succeeded, without even trying. If she had, and Spike had been killed, nothing would have been able to save Buffy from Giles' wrath.

"You have a perfect right to, but...please, don't say 'I told you so'. You were right, all of you were right..." Spike turned his face away, his jaw clenching and unclenching. "I trusted her..."

"It will--take time. Heartbreak is never easy..." Giles tried to comfort him. "Does she know--that you know?"

"Don't think so," Spike snorted and screwed up his battered face. "She was pretty busy at the time." He swallowed the bile that rose in his throat when he replayed the disgusting scene in his mind. "But--I don't want anyone to go after her...Just leave her be. I don't want her dead...or deader, whatever... I just want her out of my life."

Giles nodded his head slowly. "Very well."

As much as he wanted to make Buffy pay, he had to respect Spike's wishes on the matter.

"The same goes for everyone else. No going after her," Spike said seriously. "Make sure they understand that."

"I will. Spike, what would you like me to do when she comes looking for you...she's bound to, eventually."

"I don't want to see her...but I have to tell her--that it's over."

"If she comes, I'll send her up to you." Giles patted Spike's leg before standing up again. He cleared his throat. "I'll go get that telly for you."


 

Sam walked up to the Summers' front porch and knocked on the door. She fidgeted while she waited. She was shaken up when she got a call from Xander earlier, telling her that Spike was hurt badly the night before. Her plan had worked perfectly, but she hadn't counted on him being so distraught that he would get careless with his slaying. Thank God he hadn't been killed. That would have been...un-acceptable.

Dawn opened the door. "Hi, Sam."

The teenager looked tired, dark circles laid under her eyes.

"Dawn, how is he?"

"He'll be okay. He looked so horrible when Xander first brought him home..." Dawn's lip trembled.

Sam stepped up and hugged the girl. Dawn hugged her back tightly. She wasn't Sam's biggest fan, but she knew that Sam cared about Spike too.

"Can I see him? I was so worried when Xander called..." Sam said.

"Yeah, he's right upstairs. Go ahead." Dawn smiled.

She only hoped that Sam would be gone before Buffy got here once the sun set. It would be really awkward for all of them. Dawn considered going to Buffy's crypt to tell her what happened, but she irrationally feared that Spike would suddenly take a turn for the worst if she left the house for even a second.

Sam greeted everyone quickly before climbing the stairs to Spike's room.


 

Sam opened the door and peeked in. Spike was laying on the bed watching 'Judge Judy'. He looked like hell. Sam gasped. Spike looked over at her.

"Sam..."

"Oh, Spike!"

She closed the door and rushed over to him, sitting on the edge of the bed beside him. Tears stung her eyes.

"Your poor, beautiful face!" Her fingers fluttered just above his face, she was afraid to actually touch him.

"I know I look like shit, but I'm okay. Really. Don't get upset." Spike smiled. "And I prefer the term 'handsome' to the word 'beautiful' when describing myself."

Sam was obviously freaked out. He took one of her shaky hands in his and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

She wanted to weep. Seeing him so battered and broken was excruciating. She carefully put her arms around him, he hugged her back lightly.

"Spike...I don't know what I would have done if..." She sniffed.

"Hey, now, none of that, missy." Spike patted her back. He groaned a little. "Don't hug me too tight, my stomach--"

She released him and pulled away. "Oh God, did I hurt you?" she asked.

"No, I'm okay, you didn't hurt me. I got sliced open a little...damn Polgara Demon. It's healing but it hurts like a bitch." He fingered the large white bandage on his stomach.

Spike was touched that Sam was so concerned about him. A lot of women never wanted to talk to the guy who broke up with them again, he was lucky. She really was a good person.

"What happened? You're the best fighter I've ever seen. How was something able to hurt you this bad?"

Spike traced patterns on the quilt that covered the lower part of his body. "It's a long story..." He decided to tell her at least some of the truth. "I didn't tell you this because I didn't want to hurt you, but--I was seeing someone."

"Oh?" Sam said, acting surprised.

"Yeah, well...it's over now. I guess I went a little, make that a lot crazy, when...I realized that she really didn't care about me. It was just some kind of game..."

"Oh, Spike..." Sam touched his face lightly. "I'm sorry. I have to admit...that the thought of you with someone else--makes me uncomfortable. But I never want you suffer." A small smile lifted the corners of her mouth. "You want me to kick her ass?" She made a show of rolling up her sleeves then cracked her knuckles. "Just point her out and I'll take care of business."

Spike snorted. "No, there will be no kickings of her ass." Then he said, more serious, "Everyone told me it was stupid, that it was wrong, but I didn't listen."

"Is she--anybody I know?" Sam wanted to see if he'd admit it.

"Uh--yeah--it was--Buffy...I know it was crazy, please don't start on me about it, please..."

"I--I'm really surprised--Wow--But--I can see that you're in no mood to talk about it, so I'll lay off." Sam smiled and held his hand.

She thought that she should get an Oscar for her performance, or at least be nominated for one.

"Thanks, Sam. I think my head would explode if I had to talk about it anymore."

Spike was grateful that they were still friends. Sam was so sweet and kind, she was a bit too judgmental but--there were a lot worse traits to have.

'I should have been more patient and understanding with Sam. She never would have betrayed me like Buffy did...Yet another good thing that I ruined...'

"Can I get you anything?" she asked, eager to make him comfortable.

"Umm, maybe some ginger ale...my stomach feels kinda floopy." Spike smiled, lightly rubbing his stomach.

"You got it, beautiful. I mean, handsome." Sam smiled brightly, then went to get him a drink.

Things were going well, despite Spike's unexpected injuries. She'd make sure that he knew he could depend on her, she wanted him to feel he could lean on her in his time of need. Sam would have him back in her arms, and her bed, soon.


 

Buffy waited impatiently at the front door. She was worried about seeing Spike after what she'd done, but she missed him terribly. The Riley fiasco had to be kept a secret. Spike would never forgive her for it if he found out. It was only one night, and she hardly remembered any of it. Some flashes of memory came back to her, but everything was hazy. It was like she was seeing it through someone else's eyes. She still didn't know how she'd let herself get that blotto.

"Hey, Buffy," Dawn sighed when she opened the door.

"Dawn? What's wrong?" Buffy's stomach dropped.

The Nibblet looked exhausted and bedraggled. Something bad had happened.

Dawn took a deep breath. "It's Spike. He got hurt last night...real bad."

"Where is he? Is he all right?" Buffy panicked.

"He's upstairs--" Dawn didn't finish her sentence, Buffy raced past her and up the stairs to his room.

She threw the door open and ran in, stopping when she took in the scene: Spike was in bed, bandages all over him; his face puffy and bruised; Sam was sitting on the bed, Indian-style; they had been laughing about something when she came in. Their heads turned in her direction. The smile slid off of Spike's face when he saw her.

"Spike...what happened?" Buffy swallowed.

He looked terrible. And why was he looking at her like that?

"What did this, and tell me where it is, so that I can kill it."

"Sam...can you give me a minute--alone with her?" Spike asked.

"Sure. I have to get going anyway." Sam got up. "If you need anything, please give me a call. I'll come by tomorrow--that is, if you don't mind..."

Spike smiled. "I'd like that. Thanks, Sam."

Sam bent down and pressed a gentle kiss to one of Spike's cheekbones. Making sure that Buffy had a good view.

"You take it easy on Dawn and your Mom, now. Don't get too used to the waiting on you hand and foot thing," she joked.

"Are you kidding? I'm going to milk it for everything it's worth. Maybe I can get a chocolate cake out of the deal. Bye, Sam, thanks for coming."

"Bye, Spike."

Sam turned and walked past Buffy, glancing at her with a shit-eating grin. Sam left the room, closing the door after her.

Buffy pushed aside her burning jealousy, for the moment.

"Spike, what the bloody hell happened to you?" She began walking toward him, her hands already reaching out for him.

"Stop!" Spike held up his hand. "Just--stay there."

"What? What's wrong, Spike-pet?"

Spike grit his teeth, "Don't--call--me--that. Don't ever call me that again."

"What--did I do? Please, luv..."

"What did you do? That's a good question. What did you do last night, Buffy?"

"Wha--?"

"I asked you what you did last night. It's a simple question, really."

His voice was so cold, so detached. It terrified her. He couldn't know...could he?

'Oh God, PLEASE don't let him know!' Buffy's mind screamed.

"I--went to Willy's...played some poker..."

"Anything else?"

"That's--about it...Spike, tell me what this is about. I--"

"You left out a little tidbit, didn't you? A visit from your friend, Riley."

Buffy felt like she was going to vomit. He knew. Somehow he knew.

"Spike..." she whispered, her face frozen in horror.

"Yeah. I know about it. Do us both a favor and don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about."

"Is--that what he told you? Is that what Riley told you?" Buffy ran through all the painful ways that she intended to eviscerate her former boytoy.

Spike chuckled mirthlessly. "Plan on shooting the messenger, eh?" His jaw clenched. "Normally, I have really good eye sight, 20/20 vision. I saw you with my own two eyes. I saw you with him--in bed--what I thought was our bed."

"Oh God...Oh Spike...please, luv, you have to believe me when I say that I don't remember--"

Spike interrupted her. "Imagine my surprise when I saw the two of you going at it. And you had the nerve to get pissed at me when Dru kissed me...How long has this been going on? Have you been sleeping with him the whole time or is it a recent thing?" Spike's voice shook with anger and humiliation.

"No--no, pet! It's not like that!" Buffy kneeled on the floor by the bed, clutching at his arm. "Please! You have to let me explain!"

Spike shook her hands off of him. "Get away from me! Don't touch me!" he hissed at her. "I'm not listening to anything that you have to say! You'll just tell me more lies. Like that you love me. That was a doozy."

"I do love you, pet! I love you more than anything! You know that I love--"

"Shut up! I heard you say the same fucking thing to him while you were riding him! I never want to see you again, you bitch. If you ever--come near me again, I'll kill you." His eyes shot daggers at her.

"No, please!" Buffy cried. "I don't remember what happened with Riley! I don't know what was wrong with me! I'd never hurt you, you're the one I want! Why would I purposely bollocks up--"

"SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Spike screamed.

Buffy flinched away.

"I hate you. Get out of my room, my house and my life. Now."

He fought back tears for the millionth time today. He still loved her, so much that it hurt, but he couldn't get over her infidelity, her betrayal. It was killing him to even look at her.

"Nooo!" Buffy sobbed. "I love you, Spike! Please, pet--"

She tried to grasp one of his bandaged hands.

"I said GET OUT!" Spike pushed her away, sending her falling back onto her butt. "I don't want to see you again, I don't want to hear from you, I don't even want to hear rumors about you!"

There was loud knocking at the door.

"Spike? Are you okay?" Xander's anxious voice asked.

Everyone had heard the yelling from downstairs.

"Just a minute, Xander," Spike said more calmly, still looking at Buffy's tear-stained face. "I want you out or I'll ask the others to throw you out. They'd be happy to oblige, I'm sure. Take your pick," his voice wavered.

Buffy stood up on wobbly legs then backed away from him towards the bedroom door.

"I don't remember what happened last night...I don't know how it happened..."

"So, by your logic, I'm supposed to forgive you because you got--what? Too drunk to control yourself? You make me sick," Spike spit.

Buffy had to get out of there, her world was falling in around her, it was a good thing she didn't need to breathe or she would suffocate. She couldn't take him looking at and yelling at her like this anymore. She threw the door open and ran into Xander who was waiting on the other side, her chip buzzed. He looked down on her with contempt and barely controlled anger. She hurried past him and down the stairs, everyone was standing below, looking up at her.

"Buffy? What's--going on? Why is Spike mad at you?" Dawn said in a trembling voice.

Buffy could only stare at her, unable to form words.

"Yeah, Buffy. Why don't you tell her?" Xander said from the top of the stairs.

"I--I can't--I didn't mean to--"

Buffy pushed her way between Giles and Willow and ran out the door.

"Buffy!" Dawn started to go after her, but Willow caught her arm, holding her back. "Let me go, Willow! What's going on? Why doesn't anybody ever tell me anything?!"

"Let her go, Dawnie. Come in the living room. I'll tell you--why Spike broke up with her." The red-headed witch said softly.


 

"Well done, Riley!" Sam smiled triumphantly.

Riley had come over to her apartment after she got home from Spike's house. She was ecstatic at the way things had turned out. But she wasn't done yet. She still had some payback in store for Buffy. Riley didn't know about that part. As far as he knew, the plan was finished and was a complete success.

"It worked. It really worked! You should have seen Spike. He was devastated, he'll never go near her again!" she laughed.

"Yeah, great," Riley said without enthusiasm.

"Aww, come on! Be happy, we did it. Buck up!" Sam playfully punched his shoulder.

Riley shook his head. "Buffy still doesn't want me. I'm--just going to leave town...she'll never love me."

"Hmm, that's too bad. I was pulling for you two kids," Sam said with false sympathy. "Oh well. Where you off to then?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. France, maybe."

"Then, Bon Voyage, ma amie!" {Have a good trip, my friend.} Sam said. "I can't thank you enough for the fine work you did."

Riley's head snapped up. "You speak--French?"

"Un peu." {A little.} Sam said.

"That's--cool. I like it. Do--you know any more French words?" The French tongue really got Riley's motor running.

"Uh...." Sam didn't like the little twinkle Riley was getting in his eye. She changed the subject. "I'm going to spend the immediate future wooing Spike, I'll have him back in no time."

"Aren't you mad at him?" Riley asked, trying to take his mind off his raging libido. "I mean, he and Buffy were together like," he snapped his fingers, "that. You guys were barely--"

"I'm well aware of the facts, Riley. I am upset with Spike, but right now, he needs my love and attention. I think he knows what a stupid thing he did by breaking up with me. Thanks to you!" Sam pinched Riley's cheek.

She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. He had done so well, that she deigned to allow him to live. Her eyes widened when she felt Riley's hard-on pressing into her hip.

Boy, he really does like that French stuff...Hmm, maybe I could thank him for doing the grunt work. When Spike and I do get together, I want to know how to do the things he wants. Those kinky things. I need to work on losing some of my inhibitions. I could use Riley as a--guinea pig...It's not like he counts. He's just one of them...one of those filthy demons...' The idea both repulsed and titillated Sam. She went with her gut instinct.

"Oh, Riley?" she said musically.

"Um--yeah?" Riley was hoping she didn't feel his erection. She'd probably dust him on the spot.

Sam thought back to the French she took in high school. In truth, she didn't really know all that much. She'd just string a bunch of words together, she doubted if this half-wit actually spoke French.

"Um--J'ai une grenouille dans mon bidet." {I have a frog in my bidet.} Sam ventured, pulling back to look in his eyes.

Riley's eyes were already glazing over with lust.

Feeling more confident, Sam continued, "Je pense que la robe est trop petite pour vous." {I think the dress is too small for you.}

"Oh, Samantha, you sound so...you'd--better stop..." Riley moaned.

"Why? Is it turning you on?" She smiled.

"I can't help it! Don't stake me, okay?"

He tried pulling away from her, but she held him firmly around the waist then pulled him tighter against her.

"I was hoping that--maybe you could stake me..." Sam licked her lips.

She couldn't believe how wanton and shameless she was acting. The thought of this big, dumb, good-looking vamp stud, screwing her was getting her very hot...She had gotten used to getting it on with Spike on a regular basis, it was harder than she thought to go cold turkey. And maybe she would get some insight into why Spike was a vamp groupie.

"You mean...you want to--" Riley looked at her disbelievingly.

"That's right. I want to--have sex you. To show you how much I appreciate everything you did..." Sam kissed along his jaw. "But first, I want you to tell me, and show me, how to give a man--oral sex."

She still had a hard time thinking about it. But she'd do it for Spike. To make him happy.

"Wow--Really? Cool! It's usually super hard to get girls to do that!" Riley swept her up in his beefy arms. "Let's get started!"

He smiled and carried her over to the bed.

Riley still loved Buffy, but he would never turn down sex with an attractive woman (or Brad Pitt, but that wasn't likely to happen). Taking the Slayer's woman was an extra added thrill. There was nothing like some good, old-fashioned fucking to take your mind off your troubles.


 

Buffy sat deadly still on the sarcophagus Spike had hidden in, remarked on and used in weaponry against her so many times. She missed him terribly, and wondered what she could do. She lost him. She lost Spike because she got too drunk and had sex with that git Riley--so drunk that she could hardly remember anything about it.

She got up and started pacing around, trying to think of a way to make things up to her Slayer. She had to get him back, to make him see how sorry she was. It wasn't her fault. She stopped when she accidentally kicked the empty vodka bottle that had caused all the problems.

Buffy bent over and picked it up.

"This is all your bloody fault!" she yelled at the bottle, then flung it into the wall on the opposite side of the room, where it shattered. "I couldn't have been that drunk!" she yelled/sobbed. "Spike-pet, I'm so sorry...I'd never hurt you...I never thought I would..."

She sunk to the floor and hugged her knees, not seeing the shadow signifying a new presence in the dark crypt.

"Hey, Buffy! Thought you could--"

Clem walked in the crypt jovially enough. He stopped dead when he saw Buffy huddled on the floor in tears, precariously close to a pile of glass splinters.

He hurried over to her.

"What's the matter? Are you sick or something? You want me to get Spike?"

"He hates me, Clem. He hates me now."

Having given voice to her worst fear, Buffy then walked over to her worn, Amsterdam antique chair and dropped into it dejectedly.

"Aww, that's crazy talk! He's nuts over you, kid! I've been around long enough to recognize it when I see a guy in love...Did--something happen?" Clem asked.

Buffy nodded, her chin quivering.

He came over and sat on the floor by the chair, looking up at her and taking her hand.

"What was it?"

"I--I cheated on him--he caught--me..."

"Oh...But--why Buffy? I thought you were in love with him?"

"I didn't bloody mean to! It just--happened...I don't even remember most of last night."

"Don't tell me it was--Riley wasn't it?" Clem said disapprovingly.

"How did you know?" Buffy was surprised.

"I saw him running around outside your place last night. Oh, Buffy...What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I--love Spike--I had him...and I blew it. I BLEW IT!" Buffy pounded on the arm of the chair, and Clem silently thanked god that, for her sake, his vampire friend had no memory of the blowing she'd done the previous night.

"Something's wonky, Clem. I've never felt quite that way from drinking before and I've gotten plenty pissed drunk in my time...I think there was something else wrong with me..."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. I started feeling real woozy while I was talkin' to Riley. I was fine when I got home, drunk, but manageably so. It was that last bottle of vodka that did me in."

"Where is it? Maybe we can find out if it was a--bad batch or something."

"Uh--I kind of threw it against the wall--over there." Buffy pointed to where the bottle had shattered against the wall and ducked her head.

"Well...that makes it a little more difficult..." Clem scratched his wrinkly forehead.


 

Riley and Sam laid in bed on their backs after the lovin'.

"That was great!" Riley had a big grin on his face.

"Yeah...it was good."

Sam was a bit in shock at the things she'd done tonight. Not all of it was so bad. It was actually kind of fun in a perverse way.

"Having sex with a human is a trip! You're all hot and stuff...Nice change of pace," Riley said. "Did you like it?" He looked over at her.

"It was--yeah. But you understand that this was a one time only thing, right?"

Riley sighed. "Yeah. I know--you love Spike." He stuck out his tongue and made a face like that of a child when they didn't want to eat liver. "What's he got that I haven't?"

"I--I don't know...Well, a heartbeat comes to mind..."

"Pfft! Is that all?"

"No. There's lots of things--Riley, just drop it."

Sam giggled after a few moments.

"What's funny?"

"I was thinking of Buffy's face after I gave Spike a kiss in front of her today...very nice. And you should have heard Spike yelling at her! I hung around outside hoping to hear some fireworks and I did."

Riley wasn't feeling as good about everything as he thought he would. Buffy and Spike were broken up, that was good. But he felt--bad for hurting Buffy.

"I could've made her happy, if she let me," Riley said sadly.

"Yeah, that's too bad. Seems like her and Spike had that in common. Not having the good sense to know who they should've been with." Sam got out of bed, putting on her robe. "I'm going to take a shower. You can let yourself out. Thanks again for all the help, Riley. Couldn't have done it without you. And thanks for the sex. I can't wait to try it on Spike!"

She went into the bathroom.

"Yeah...don't mention it."


 

Later that night, after the Scoobies had gone home, Dawn went into Spike's room with a large, steaming cup of her surprisingly edible hot chocolate. She was disillusioned and hurt--a little for herself, but mostly for her brother. Willow had told her that Spike found out Buffy was cheating on him. She knew that there was more to the story than that, but that's all they told her. They never treated her like an adult.

Dawn put the mug on his nightstand. Spike was turned away from her.

"Spike? You awake?" she whispered.

"Yeah," he said quietly.

"Why--why would Buffy--hurt you like that? I don't understand. She was so happy..."

Spike sighed and rolled over on his back. "I really don't know, Dawn. I wish I did..."

"I'm sorry, it's all my fault," Dawn said miserably.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"I--pushed for you two to get together. If I hadn't done that--"

"Hey, come here." Spike held his arms open.

Dawn climbed on the bed beside him and curled into his arms, resting her head in the crook of his neck.

"It's not your fault, not in any way. It's Buffy's fault, and nobody else's." He stroked her smooth, shiny brown hair.

"I really liked her," Dawn said.

"Yeah...me too."

"Is that why you got so beat up last night? Because you were upset?"

"Kind of, yeah." Spike was uncomfortable talking about this with his little sister.

"I hate her. I wish that someone would dust her," Dawn said, her voice trembling.

"I don't want anyone to hurt her..." Spike said, stroking her hair.

Dawn sat up and looked at him.

"Why? She's evil and mean and...She lied to you. She lied to all of us."

"Because...I still love her," Spike said simply.

"How can you? After what she did?"

"I don't know. But I do. It doesn't--just go away."

"I never want to fall in love." Dawn laid back down in his arms. "People hurt each other. That's all they do."

"That's not true. You can't just close yourself off like that." Spike felt like a hypocrite. That's exactly what he had done and planned on doing in the future. "You're not me, you actually stand a chance at having a successful, lasting relationship." He tried to lighten the mood. "You're not allowed to date until you're 30, by the way."

"What about Mom and Dad? They hurt each other too," Dawn whispered.

"They had a lot of--good years though. And I know that Mom would choose to have--us, if she had it all to do over again..."

It was still hard for Spike to comprehend that Dawn wasn't really his little sister. She was 'The Key', given human form and placed in his family by a group of monks. But she was his sister, in every way that mattered.

"She didn't have me in the first place...I--" Dawn was confused and frightened when she found out she wasn't really who she thought she was.

"Don't start that. You are my sister. Mom and I love you. We couldn't love you more than we already do. Okay?"

Dawn kicked Spike semi-playfully and said 'eww!' before lying back down next to Spike. She wasn't really convinced that she was truly wanted above any other Darwinian possibility, but didn't want to get into that conversation.

"Are you going to get back with Sam?" Dawn asked.

"I--don't know. Maybe...someday. But it's too soon for me to think about that kind of stuff."

Spike had thought about it a little. He was too devastated now, but who knew what the future held? Although he doubted Sam would be available when he was finally ready to move on.

"I didn't like her so much--before. You guys were always telling me to get lost so you could make with the smoochies. But I guess she's okay...Oh, I almost forgot. I brought you some hot chocolate."

"Thanks, sis. But I'm going to drown if I drink anything else tonight," Spike joked.

Joyce came in the room and smiled when she saw her children cuddled up together.

"Hey, you two. It's bedtime, Dawn."

"Aww, Mom! It's Saturday! Why do I have to go to bed?" Dawn whined.

"Because you've been up almost 24 hours and have been running around taking care of your brother all day. You need to rest, honey."

"Mom's right, baby Jane," Spike said in off-kilter, too-subversive humor as he bent forward and kissed the top of Dawn's head. "Thanks for taking such good care of me today."

Dawn grinned happily. "I love you. Night, Spike." Dawn kissed his cheek.

She was going to make it a point from now on to tell the people she loved how she felt. What happened to Spike last night had made her see the importance of telling people how you felt, because you may not get another chance.

"Ditto, troll face", Spike replied warmly.

He felt the all too familiar sting of tears in his eyes. He was mildly astonished that he was able to get through the short, but difficult conversation without breaking down. Perverse and bizarre humor had helped, but now he let out what he'd pushed down all day, and Spike sighed in relief when Dawn left the room.

Joyce came over and sat on the edge of the bed.

"How are you feeling, sweetie?" she asked him, tucking in the edge of the quilt around him.

"Getting better. Dawn and everyone did take good care of me today. Too good," the Slayer gave his mother an admonishing look before adding to ease her responding brow furrow, "the spells and poultice thingies Tara and Willow used on me helped a lot."

Joyce could see that he was trying to put on a happy face for her benefit.

"I heard that--you and Buffy broke up." Willow had filled Joyce in on the basic details.

"Yeah...we did. It was--messy. I told her--not to come around here anymore. Willow did the dis-" Spike paused a moment, "the disinvitation spell on the house..." It still hurt incredibly bad to know that it was over.

"I know how much you--liked her. I'm sorry." Joyce hugged him lightly.

She felt guilty for not resisting the relationship and giving it her tentative approval.

Spike hugged her in return. Joyce pulled back and looked closely at his face.

"Your face does look better. The swelling has gone done a lot. My poor baby, your beautiful, sweet little face."

"Mo-om..." Spike groaned with a smile.
 

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