Title: One Last Sunrise
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Buffy/Spike
Summary: Buffy knew from the moment that Spike stepped into her room that tonight would be the night. She knew what he was going to do, and she knew she was going to let him. Because she wanted it too.
Spoilers: AU Post- “Becoming Part 2”.
Story Word Count: 3 660
Author Notes: Thanks to my beta Angela (spikesbint) for the editing & Jaqui (shagmedraco) for being the first one to read it and kindly say that it was good enough.
Warning: Mentioning of Character Death & Character Vamping.
Written: October ‘04
Complete.

One Last Sunrise (1/1)

~*~

..... Spike, 1880, London (25 years old)

..... William sat alone in his room, writing on a piece of parchment. The only source of light was the single oil lamp which burned softly beside him on his desk.

..... He had been working all night on the poem and finally, it was finished. He ended the poem with a smile. This was his greatest work as of yet.

..... He wanted to read it to his mother the first thing in the morning, as she enjoyed them so, but he decided to wait. It would only be right that the first person to hear it was the one it was meant for; Cecily Adams.

..... He glanced out the large window situated almost right off to his side and realized with no small amount of surprise that dawn had already begun to lighten the sky.

..... He extinguished the lamp and stood, stretching his body for a while before yawning. He walked over to the window and sat down on the ledge, looking down onto the street and over the rooftops, watching the sun rise above them. He had spent many a nights there on the windowsill; not being able to tear himself away from the fascinating books he read or staying up to late working on a poem or two and then deciding to watch the sunrise before going to sleep.

..... Tonight there was something else that kept him up. He could feel it in his guts, that there was something about this night, this morning, something that would come to mean a lot to him in the years to come. He couldn’t explain the need to stay awake just a little while longer, but he had to follow his instincts.

..... So William sat in that window and watched the sun rise in the horizon, not knowing that later that night, as he met his creator and fell into damnation, this would be the moment he’d think of before darkness swallowed him.

..... He didn’t know that this instant would become the most vivid memory he would have of his human days, and that it would stay with him for centuries. He didn’t know that when his only Childe asked him about the night he’d been turned more than a century later, all he would remember clearly would be that moment, when the sun brightened the sky and the town began to wake up.

..... He didn’t know that because of that moment, he would almost risk his life to make sure that the love of his life saw one last sunrise before he saved her from her leukemia, but damned her from the sun and mortal life forever.

..... But even if he didn’t know all that at the time, he savored it as if it was to be the last sunrise he’d ever see.

~ *~

….. Buffy, 2001, New York (20 years old)

..... Buffy knew from the moment that Spike stepped into her room that tonight would be the night. She was tired of fighting. Earlier that day, the doctors had given her the bad news; unless they found a donor within the next two weeks, she wouldn’t make it. And, even if they did find a donor in that time, her chances of surviving the operation were very slim. By the look on Spikes face, her doctor had just broken the news to him and she knew he wasn’t going to wait any longer.

..... She knew what he was going to do, and she knew she was going to let him. Because she wanted it too.

..... Her and Spike had been together for almost 2 years. After leaving Sunnydale, Buffy had gone back to LA to try and get over Angel, trying to get a fresh start that didn’t involve her being the slayer.

..... It hadn’t been more than two weeks before she bumped into Spike while clubbing with some of her coworkers. After a long and hard fight to the death in the alley behind the club, the two had called a truce. Instead of finishing the fight, and each other, Spike had taken her to a bar close by where the two of them had proceeded to drink themselves under the table and spill all of their secrets to each other. They’d got drawn into a bar fight between two rival biker gangs, and when they managed to escape the bar, laughing like mad, they had both silently decided to stay together.

..... When Spike first saw Buffys apartment, he’d been horrified. He knew that the diner she worked at didn’t pay much, but the apartment she lived in was beyond cheep. A one room place, the warm water pump didn’t work properly, the window didn’t quite shut completely and the walls were so thin, he would’ve been able to hear all of her neighbors even if he wasn’t a vampire. He’d told her that under no circumstances was he going to let her live there any longer and told her to pack her things. She had, and an hour later she and her things had found a home in Spikes apartment. At first, she’d been hesitant about moving in with him, but she reasoned that if he’d wanted to kill her, he would’ve done so already. Besides, after Dru left him because of him having helped her save the world, he wanted someone to take care of. And she needed someone to take care of her, even if that someone was her mortal enemy.

..... It wasn’t long until they became lovers; spending so much time together and the physical attraction that had always been there became too much for them one night. It took them even less time to fall in love.

..... The only problems they really had, had been getting used to each other and their habits. Buffy had demanded that Spike stopped killing, stealing and doing all the other evil things he’d done for the last century. Instead he had to bag it and take his violent tendencies out on computer games. He had agreed to everything except for bagging it. He was a vampire, and even if he was shacking up with the slayer, he wasn’t going to drink blood from a bag.

..... After arguing about it for a very long time, Buffy had given up and said that she’d allow him some of her blood every once in a while. He’d agreed of course, he’d be a fool if he hadn’t. The truth was, he hadn’t been as opposed to the idea of getting his blood from bag as he’d led her to believe, it was easier after all to drink it from bags, but he’d wanted her to realize what he would give it up for her.

..... Spike in turn had asked Buffy not to stake any vampires or kill any demons, unless they came after her or she saw someone else getting attacked. He said that not only was it fair, but otherwise the demon community would get alerted of her presence in LA and come after her and neither of them wanted that. Buffy, who’d wanted to turn her back on that part of her for good, had happily agreed.

..... For two months Buffy didn’t see a single demon anywhere. As she usually spent her time at home with Spike, or at work, it wasn’t a surprise. Especially not as Spike dropped her off and picked her up from work everyday and she didn’t even have the walk home to slay vampires and other creatures of the night on.

..... Then, one night they went out with the same group of coworkers Buffy had been with when they’d first met in LA. They went to the same club and danced the night away. On their way home, they were ambushed by a group of 7 vampires who’d heard a rumor that the Slayer was in town and had wanted to investigate. As Spike had known in advance that there would be drinking involved and he didn’t want to risk crashing with Buffy in the car, and Buffy herself couldn’t drive and would get even drunk than Spike, they’d left the car at home. Spike regretted that decision as soon as he sensed the approaching vampires.

..... Thankfully, they were all novices and even in his drunken state he managed to overpower them and dust them all, wanting to protect his mate.

..... That had made him stop in his tracks for a moment in confusion, as he tried to remember the day, the moment, when he’d started to think of her as his. He’d looked over at Buffy where she leaned against the wall for support, not being able to hold her liquor very well, and he realized that he’d always thought of her as his. Even when they’d been mortal enemies, she’d been his moral enemy.

..... After that night, he realized that if a bunch of fledglings would be able to find her, so would most of the demon community. So after that night, he began to train her, wanting her to get back into slaying shape and soon she was patrolling. As he didn’t want her to get hurt, and honestly, he missed the violence, he accompanied her on her patrols. Usually, he just stood back and watched her, giving her pointers and basked in the knowledge that the fiery woman he saw dancing and easily killing the demons they came across was his. But sometimes, he helped her out, stepped in when he saw that a demon of some kind began to get the upper hand.

..... At first, they’d only gone out a few times a week, but soon they were out every night. Not only did it do Buffy good to slay vampires, both physically and emotionally, but after a night of patrolling, and a good fight, she could barely wait to get back home before she jumped Spike. Most of their patrols ended with them having hot and passionate sex in the cemetery or alley they happened to been in at the time.

..... After another 2 months of patrolling, Spike spied Giles and Xander in one of LA’s nicer demon bars. He’d been there to meet with a guy who knew a guy who could get him a new legal identity, as the one he had was starting to get to old.

..... He’d hurried home to Buffy and after talking it through with her, they decided to leave LA for New York. They’d been planning on moving there at the end of the year, and now all they had to do was move up their plans a few months. Thankfully, Spike knew a guy in New York who owed him a favor and he fixed them up for a while in one of his many apartments.

..... It wasn’t long after that that they found out about Buffys disease. They had barely had the time to come to terms with the fact that Buffy’s mortality was rearing its ugly head before they thought it would, when they found out that her leukemia was spreading much faster than the doctors had at first thought and that she wouldn’t have much time left.

..... It was then, while crying their eyes out at the thought of losing each other that Spike confessed to Buffy that he was going to turn her. If not right then, he’d wait till she was too weak to fight him and wouldn’t be able to stop him. When she’d asked him why, he’d said that it was because he wouldn’t be able to go on without her.

..... In the time that they’d been together, she’d come to mean more to him than anyone had ever done before, and he couldn’t let her go. She was the only one who accepted him, William the Poet and Spike the Slayer of Slayers and loved him wholly.

..... She’s asked him why he told her instead of taking her by surprise when that day came. He’d answered that he wanted her to know, so that when the day came and he would turn her, she would know why he did it.

..... She had nodded, accepting his answer and after a lingering kiss, she’d asked him if he would turn her another time, even if she made it through this. He had looked at her, their eyes locking for a few moments before he glanced down at their joined hands. He hadn’t answered her question that night, still hadn’t, but she had seen the answer in his eyes.

..... And now, as Buffy lay in her hospital bed, waiting for Spike to do or say something, she couldn’t help but smile tiredly up at him. She was going to be turned into a vampire, one of the creatures of the night that she’d spent years killing, and she would lose her soul, and yet, she couldn’t help but feel that this was her salvation.

..... She wasn’t ready to be gone from the world just yet, and to leave Spike. She doubted that they’d be able to find a donor in the short time she had left; after all, they hadn’t found one yet. She knew that this was her only hope. Whether it happened tonight or in a few years from now, being turned into a vampire and spending eternity with the love of her life was her destiny.

..... And she was ready for her destiny to begin tonight.

..... Spike walked up to stand beside her bed and the two smiled at each other, although Buffys smile was a small and tired one. Then Spike leaned down and kissed her forehead, his lips lingering on her skin for a few moments. The simple and familiar gesture brought tears to Buffys eyes and as he pulled away, Spike carefully wiped away the few tears escaping her eyes. He knew she was frightened, frightened of being soulless and being turned into someone who wasn’t her.

..... He knew in his heart that she would still be herself. He would take care of her; make sure that she didn’t do something that her soul wouldn’t have liked. He would be her soul, just as she was his.

..... Spike glanced towards the windows and its shut blinds, already knowing that they had enough time before the sun rose. At first the doctors had been reluctant to them being shut during the day, saying that she needed the sun, but after Buffy told them about her boyfriends ‘skin condition’, they’d let her do as she pleased with them. As Spike stayed with her almost every day, and every night, the blinds were almost always shut.

..... Spike kissed Buffys forehead one more time before walking over to the small closet on the other side of the room. After quickly packing all of her things into her bag, and making sure he got everything, he lifted it up onto his shoulder before going back to Buffy.

..... They still hadn’t spoken a word to each other, but their intimacy with each other ran so deep that they didn’t need to. Many days and nights could be spent in silence, and neither would notice, as they communicated without words.

..... After one more kiss on Buffys forehead, Spike helped her sit up in the bed and get into his leather coat. She was very weak and it pained him to see his love in so much agony. He comforted himself with the knowledge that in a few hours her pain would go away.

..... He easily lifted her up from the bed and carried her out of the room, wrapped up in his duster. He had already signed her out; he’d done so right after the doctors told him the bad news, and there was no one stopping them as he walked down the hallway. The doctors and nurses working on her floor all knew she wouldn’t make it, which was why they’d let Spike take her home, to let her die in peace, as she had asked of them. And if they found a donor, they would call Spike and he would bring her in. At least that had been the idea.

..... He held her in his arms, feeling her heart beating against his skin and her head resting against his shoulder, as they used the elevator to get down and into the underground parking lot. He carried her over to their car and gently put her down on the passenger seat and securing her form properly. He then threw her bag into the backseat before he hurriedly walked around the car and got in to the drivers seat. He glanced at her as he started the car, her head leaning against the cold window and her eyes closed. She fell asleep as Spike drove them through and out the city. He had bought a small house just a few hours outside New York for Buffy as an anniversary gift. They had never had the time to live out there in the house, as that had been the same week that they found out about Buffys leukemia, and that she needed to be close to the hospital.

..... He drove in silence, often glancing down at Buffy as she slept, her face illuminated by the street lights every few feet. She was beautiful, even now that her sickness had taken most of her strength and vitality and the medicine most of her hair and glow. Her hair was very short, shorter than his. Spike himself had helped her shave it all off when she started to lose it and then again just a month ago. She’d rather get it all shaved off herself than wait for it to fall off, something that the doctors said was a common thing to do.

..... Spike admitted to himself, -and this he would never tell her because he knew she would be sad-, that he missed her long flowing locks and how they seemed to shine even in the dark. He especially missed the way it looked spread across his pillow in candlelight as they made love or as she slept beside him in his arms. He knew that she missed them too, that losing her hair had made her feel less of a woman. He’d slipped up once, during one of the first few days after she’d started to lose her hair, and called her ‘goldilocks’, something he’d been calling her for years. She’d broken down, crying for hours and hours over the loss of her hair and their situation.

..... He smiled sadly at the memory, but comforted himself with the knowledge that not only would she be fine in a few hours, but her hair would have all the time in the world to grow long again.

..... After several hours of driving, they finally arrived at their house. Spike parked the car and got out. After making sure that Buffy was okay, he quickly got her bag out from the back and hurried up to the house. He locked up and went inside, turning on the lights as he went. He put her bag in the living room as he hurried past towards their bedroom, opening the door and making sure that the bed covers were turned down. After checking that everything had been taken care off, he went back outside to the car.

..... He carefully maneuvered the still sleeping Buffy out of the car into the house and down the hallway. Instead of walking into her bedroom and putting her to bed, he passed the door and continued out onto the patio, gently putting her down in one of the sun chairs. He glanced up at the sky, sensing the approaching dawn and he carefully woke Buffy.

..... He reached inside the door and picked up the blanket lying, waiting for him, just inside of it and covered himself with it. After making sure that Buffy was awake and was looking up at the sky and the sunrise, he hid behind a makeshift wall he had been working on when Buffy got sick. It was there so that he would be able to be outside during the day as well, but as it wasn’t finished, it was still risky for him to be there.

..... Buffy looked from the sunrise and back at Spike for a while, before just looking at the sun. She knew that this would be the last time she’d ever see it like that, and she was going to treasure every last moment of it, which was what Spike wanted her to do.

..... When the sun had risen to high for Spike to be able to stay outside anymore, he walked up to her and picked her up. No matter how much he wanted her to be able to sit there all day and bask in the sun, she was too weak. He carried her into the house again, closing the patio door with the help of his right foot, and carried her into their bedroom, laying her down on the bed.

.....“I’ve always wanted to see what you looked like in real light.” Spike said as he lay down in the bed next to her. “I’m glad I got to see it at least once.”

..... “Me too.” Buffy whispered with a small smile. “Thank you.”

..... “I just wanted you to be able to see it one last time.” He said and her smile widened slightly. “Are you ready?” he asked and Buffy didn’t hesitate as she nodded. Spike leaned down and kissed her lips before looking her directly in her eyes.

.....“This is going to hurt a bit.” He said and she nodded that she knew, and smiled at him encouragingly. He leaned down and kissed her on the virgin side of her neck, not wanting to touch the side that had been bitten by his great-grand Sire years before.

..... And as his fangs entered her jugular, and her life slipped away, Buffy couldn’t help but smile. She had seen her last sunrise and she was ready.

  The End.