The Biggest Shopping Day Of The Year
Part One
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEE--
Buffy's hand smacked down on the alarm clock and she snuggled back down under
the covers, not really even waking up. She barely noted Spike turning on his
side and throwing his arm around her waist. She was about to slip back into her
dream involving her mate and a limitless credit card when she sat up suddenly.
"Credit card!" she exclaimed, waking Spike up. She scrambled out of the queen
sized bed and flipped off the alarm clock. "Half-an-hour!"
Spike pried open his eyes and peered at Buffy, who had rushed over to her
dresser to pull clothing out. "What are you doing, pet?" he asked groggily.
"What do you mean, what am I doing?" Buffy said quickly, comfy running pants,
tee-shirt, thick socks and undergarments in hand. "It's the Friday after
Thanksgiving!"
The blond vampire frowned as his wife disappeared into their bathroom.
"What's that got to do with anything?" he called to her.
Buffy's head popped around the corner to give him an incredulous look. "Um,
hello? Where have you been? It's only the biggest shopping day of the
year."
Spike lifted his head and looked at the clock, then flopped back down on the
pillow with a groan. "Slayer, it's only five-thirty in the morning."
"And I'm already going to be late!" Buffy yelled to him from the bathroom.
"Late? For what? To beat the rooster's crow?"
"Spike, the stores open at 6:00 a.m.," she said, rushing back over to her
dresser to pull out a sports bra. "Willow and Cordelia will be here in fifteen
minutes, then we're going over to Mom's to get Faith."
He grabbed the pillow next to him and put it over his face. "I will never
understand women," he muttered into the light blue pillowcase. He heard the
shower go on and sighed, then got up out of bed.
Clad in a pair of dark green boxers, he made his way to the kitchen to put on
the coffee for Buffy. The clock on the microwave pronounced brightly that it was
5:34. Spike groaned and rubbed his eyes. They had just gone to bed an hour
before, after staying until two in the morning with his new family at a
Thanksgiving dinner at Buffy's mother's house, then sitting in the car while the
Slayer did a quick patrol before coming back to their apartment. He'd then had
the pleasure of making love to his mate for the first time since before
Halloween, followed promptly by losing whatever blood was left in his stomach
from earlier in the evening into the toilet. Fully healing couldn't come soon
enough for him.
*****
Buffy found Spike in the kitchen ten minutes later, staring blankly at the
brewing coffee in the pot. She pressed her lips together in a thin line of
worry. She knew she should have put off making love to him, especially after the
very long, stressful evening with her family. But she hadn't and he'd ended up
spending twenty minutes in the bathroom resting his forehead against the cool
porcelain of the toilet. Now he was doing that blank-look thing that she had
come to quickly hate, which seemed to always happen between the time he'd vomit
up the blood in his body and feeding again.
"Spike," she said quietly, so as not to startle him. "Hey, are you alive in
there?"
Spike blinked and jerked his head towards her, as if he was surprised to find
her there. Then he looked her over from head-to-toe, a smile growing on his
face. "You look like you're ready to do battle, luv," he commented.
"I am," Buffy replied, pushing her unhappiness away and giving him a quirky
grin. She lifted her arm and flexed her muscle. "I'm pumped and ready to fight
the Grammas of Sunnydale."
There was a sharp knock on the front door. Buffy went to go answer it as
Spike got out a travel mug for the coffee. "Hi guys," the Slayer greeted her
friends a little more subdued than she had been when she had gotten up. "Anyone
want some coffee to go?"
"Not me," Willow said, bouncing as she entered the Brody's apartment. "I've
already had two mochas."
Cordelia shook her head at Willow's actions. "And she is annoying the hell
out of me."
Buffy closed the door behind her friends. "Just let me get my purse, and
we're gone," she said, then headed back towards the bedroom.
"Hi Spike," Willow greeted the blond, who had moved to lean against the wall
of the entryway to the kitchen, holding a travel mug in his hand. "It's too bad
you're a vampire, or you could have come with."
"And here I was so looking forward to going, too," Spike said with fake
dismay.
"Let's motor," Buffy said, reentering the living room. She walked up to her
husband, took the mug, and went up on her toes to kiss him on the mouth. "I'll
be home late. Get some sleep, okay?"
Spike nodded. "Have fun."
"Fun?" Cordelia said. "Shopping isn't fun, it's an art."
"And the paintbrush is colored gold," Buffy added with a grin. "Visa Gold."
Spike sighed after the ladies had left, talking animatedly about their plan
of attack. He suddenly felt sorry for the hapless shoppers who got in their way.
Returning into the kitchen, he turned off the coffee maker, then headed back to
the bedroom. Five minutes later, he was happily asleep once again.
*****
"Spike looked pale," Willow said, once the three girls were outside of the
apartment building, heading to Cordelia's car. "Not that he doesn't always look
pale. I meant paler than normal."
"He looked grey to me," Cordelia said. "Like that new nail polish color 'dry
cement.'"
"There's a nail polish color called 'dry cement?'" Willow said incredulously.
"And 'wet cement,' 'gravel,' and 'blacktop,'" Cordelia told her. "Don't you
read Cosmo?"
"Back to Spike," Willow said. She looked at Buffy with worry. "Is he okay?"
"He was sick again," Buffy replied. The conversation paused as they got into
the car, then the Slayer continued. "I hate it. He's a vampire, he's not suppose
to throw up. His organs are non-functioning, for Pete's sake."
"Can we not talk about this?" Cordelia said. "Vampire regurgitation is not
something I want to hear about at 5:45 in the morning."
"Since when do you know such a big word, Cordy?" Buffy asked.
"Don't worry, Buffy," Willow said. "I'm sure Spike will be fine. Angel's
gotten shot a bunch of times, and he's fine."
Buffy sighed. "I guess."
"Alright, no more sobbing over Spike and his strange vampire body," Cordelia
said. "We have shopping to do."
Part Two
"What about this one?" Willow asked, pulling a dress off the rack.
"Too green," Faith said.
"Is Xander going to have to wear a tux again?" Buffy asked Cordelia, frowning
at the dress she'd taken from the rack. She quickly put it back.
"Yes," Cordelia replied. "The Annual Country Club Silent Auction is the
black tie event of the year. I have an appointment to get his haircut on
Tuesday."
"This one?" Willow said.
"Too yellow," Faith replied.
"You make it sound like Xander's a pet," Buffy said with a giggle.
"Is it my fault that he can't groom himself to save his life?" Cordelia said.
"How about this?"
"Too blue."
"Is there anything we can do to help?" Buffy teased. "If you give me his
leash, I'll be sure to walk him."
"Just be sure not to have the apocalypse on that night," Cordelia said. "If I
miss the chance to show up Jenny Pirtonio, who's back from Brown for winter
break, I will have to kill you."
"I'll call all those big, nasty demon types and tell them to postpone their
plans for world endage," Buffy said.
"Here, this one's good," Willow said.
"Too black," Faith told the redhead.
"Too black? Faith, almost your entire wardrobe is black," Willow said,
exasperated.
"Yeah, but this is my first Christmas dohickey thang," Faith said.
"Christmas dohickey thang?" Buffy said, looking over the racks at the other
two girls.
"Well, yeah, you know," Faith said, ducking her head. "I got a, uh, date for
that Bronze Christmas Eve party."
All three girls looked at the brunette Slayer for a moment, then started
talking at once.
"Date?!" Buffy exclaimed. "With who? When did this happen? Do we know him?"
"Faith, that's great," Willow said. "Why didn't you say anything sooner?
"Who would want to date you?" Cordelia asked.
"His name's Chris, and he goes to college with you all," Faith said. She
shrugged. "Don't know if you know him or not. But he's human, far as I can tell.
And a hottie-hott."
Buffy picked up her bags from earlier that morning, then walked over to Faith
and linked arms. "This calls for a mocha-break, so Faith can dish," the blond
Slayer said, leading the way out of the store. "And we want to hear all the
details, with full color and surround sound."
*****
"What?" Spike growled into the phone, after being woken up with its incessant
ringing.
"Hey Junior, it's Xander," Xander said over the line. "What are you up to?"
"My neck in your intestines," Spike muttered under his non-existent breath.
"What was that?"
"I said I was sleeping," Spike lied. He glanced over at the clock on Buffy's
side of the bed. "It's only ten-forty in the morning. Can't you leave a vampire
in peace?"
"Sheesh, sorry," Xander said. "I was just calling to find out if you wanted
to do the guy day-after-Thanksgiving-thing with me and Oz, since the women-folk
are all shopping."
Spike sighed and put his arm over his eyes. "What does it entail?" he asked,
knowing that he probably wasn't going to be able to get back to sleep after the
phone call. Plus, he liked doing things with Oz, and he could tolerate having
Xander around as long as the wolf was there, too.
"Television, beer and leftovers," Xander replied. "Plus the occasional trip
to the bathroom."
"Sounds swell," Spike said, monotone. "Give me an hour and you can come by.
As long as you bring the beer."
"Got it," Xander said. "Later."
"Yeah," Spike said, then hit disconnect. He laid there for several minutes,
portable phone in hand, and tried to ignore the churning sensation in his
stomach. Then he was up and darting into the master bathroom to be sick in the
toilet, feeling as though someone was ripping his guts out with a knife as he
heaved up thick bits of congealed blood.
He laid his cheek on the cool porcelain of the toilet rim, and wished that
whatever was making him feel a little bit worse every day would just, plain
stop.
*****
"You're looking...dead," Oz commented to Spike upon entering the apartment.
"You feeling alright, man?"
"Never better," Spike lied. "I probably look like shit because some annoying
sod woke me up."
"Hey, be nice or I'll take my beer home," Xander said, carrying a paper
grocery bag in each hand. Clinking could be heard emitting from them as he
walked to the kitchen.
Oz studied Spike for another moment. "You sure?"
Spike gave the wolf a smile, actually touched by his concern. "I'm sure,
mate."
Oz nodded and moved into the living room as Xander exited the kitchen,
juggling three open beers and a bag of pretzels in his hands. The brunette set
everything down on the coffee table, then flopped down upon the couch. Oz joined
him on the opposite end, and Spike sat down on the recliner.
"Who's up for football?" Xander said, snagging the remote.
"American or British?" Spike asked.
"We're in America, pal," Xander said, turning on the television. "So of
course American."
"Oh, pardon me," Spike said sarcastically. He leaned forward, grabbed a beer
off the table, and took a sip. He made a face at the bitter taste of barley
mixed with the remaining taste of toothpaste in his mouth.
"Looks like we got a choice -- Cowboys/Chargers or Packers/Broncos," Xander
said, flipping back and forth between the two cable sports stations.
"Packers/Broncos," Oz said. "Definitely."
Spike leaned back on the recliner and relaxed, half-listening to the two
teens discuss each team.
*****
Giles shut the door to his home behind him, pile of mail in hand. He walked
over towards his desk in the corner, flipping through the envelopes. He frowned
at one with the return address of the Los Angeles Police Department. Pulling it
free, he set down the rest of the mail and opened it.
The Watcher looked at the signature line. "Oh, Kim Christopher, of course,"
he said to himself as he began to read.
Rupert~
Sorry it took so long to get back to you with this. Small gang war. You
know, the usual.
Anyway, here it is. I found something pretty odd within the bullet. Are
you guys using guns to hunt vampires now?
Kim
P.S. You still owe me dinner, kid.
Giles smiled at the post script and set the letter aside to look at the
report. He had forgotten that he'd sent the bullet he'd extracted from Spike to
his old friend at the police department. At the time he'd prepared the request,
he had thought perhaps it would help them in finding out who was behind the
shooting. With Willow finding the phone it became unnecessary to send it,
however, he did anyway, even though he couldn't pinpoint the reason as to why.
Now he was glad he did.
"Oh dear," Giles breathed, sinking down into the desk chair. He reread one
part of the report in hopes that the words would change.
Components:
Pb 99.5%
Allium sativum 0.5%
"Allium sativum," Giles whispered in horror. "Garlic."
*****
Xander nudged Oz and gestured with his head towards Spike. The wolf leaned
forward to see past the dark-haired teen, and a small frown appeared between his
brows. Spike was sitting in the chair, staring blankly towards the front door.
"Spike, you with us, man?" Oz asked. The blond vampire didn't move or
respond.
"Maybe he's asleep," Xander said. He glanced at Spike, then back at Oz.
"Think we should go?"
"It's only polite," Oz replied with a nod.
Xander turned off the television, and the two friends stood. They took their
empty beer bottles to the kitchen, then left the apartment as quietly as
possible.
Spike's head jerked when the front door shut, and he blinked several times.
He frowned in confusion when he found the television off and Xander and Oz gone.
Just a moment ago they were arguing over who was a better quarterback, Farve or
Elway.
The phone rang, and Spike pushed aside his confusion for the moment to answer
it. "Hello?"
"Spike? This i-is Giles," Giles said over the line.
"The Slayer's shopping, Watcher," Spike told the man. "You'll have to use the
pager to get her."
"Actually, I wished to speak to you," Giles said. "I, er, received a letter
from a friend of mine who works for the Los Angeles Police Department-"
"Haven't eaten any cops lately, so it wasn't me," Spike interrupted.
"What? Oh, no," Giles said. "The letter was in regards to your getting shot.
I took the liberty of sending the bullet to her in order to aid us in-in finding
who had shot you."
"I thought the Slayer said that it was Trick," Spike said.
"It was," Giles agreed. "However, at the time that I had sent it to Kim, we
did not know that. Until I received this letter, I had plum forgot that I had
sent the bullet to her to begin with."
"I take it by your calling me, it's not good news." Spike's stomach started
to churn, and he moved to sit down at the small kitchen table.
"No, it's not," Giles said. "The bullet that you were shot with had trace
elements of-of-of allium sativum in it."
When Giles didn't go on, Spike got a very bad feeling. "And that means what
in English, Watcher?" he asked slowly.
"The bullet was packed with garlic."
Everything went out of focus for a moment. Spike sat there, clutching the
phone, trying not to be sick. He swallowed heavily and took several purposeful
breaths.
"Are you still there?" Giles asked over the line.
The Watcher's sentence triggered a thought in Spike's mind. "Yeah, I am.
Question is, why?"
"I'm not sure I follow..."
"Garlic kills us, mate," Spike said. "It burns just like holy water does. So
why the bloody hell didn't I die soon after I got shot?"
"I...I don't know," Giles admitted. "Perhaps there wasn't enough garlic
within the bullet, or-or perhaps I removed the bullet soon enough, or you bled
the garlic out. It could be numerous things, such as your age, your lineage, er,
your 'will to live' as it were."
"But what say I healed enough to wake up, but there's still tiny, soddin
fragments of garlic left in my head?" Spike asked, already knowing the answer.
"Er, they-they would more than likely continue to burn," Giles said. "If one
entered a vein or artery, they might float down to a different portion of your
body before continuing to-"
"Got it," Spike cut him off. "Thanks for the head's up, mate."
"Shall I give the report to Buffy to pass on to you?" Giles asked.
"No. Just hold onto it," Spike replied. "And don't tell her. I'll do that
myself."
"Right," Giles said.
"Goodnight," Spike said before Giles could say any more. He stood and hung up
the phone, then managed to make it to the guest bathroom before he got sick once
again. He knew, without looking at the small chunks of blood in the toilet, that
some of the garlic had moved down his body and was eating away at his
non-functioning internal organs.
And he also knew it would only be a matter of time before the garlic
destroyed him from the inside out.
Part Three
"Well, what do you think?" Buffy asked, turning in a full circle outside of
her dressing room door.
"I think you're going to be missing the Christmas Eve party at the Bronze
this year," Faith said.
Buffy grinned. "So yes?"
"A definite yes," Willow said with a nod. Buffy bounced slightly as she went
back into her dressing room.
Cordelia sighed and turned the page in her magazine.
"I think I'm going to go with the blue one," Willow said, examining the
dresses in her hands. "Oz has hair dye this color."
"Hey, B, did you decide on the black naughty bits or the red?" Faith asked.
"The red," Buffy called over the top of her dressing room door. "I just hope
Spike is feeling better by then."
"Not more 'As Spike Hurls,'" Cordelia sighed.
"If it were your husband, you'd be singing a different tune," Buffy said.
"If I had a husband, I would not be shopping at Carson's with you three,"
Cordelia said back.
"He'll be fine, Buffy," Willow said. "Christmas is still a month away. Lots
of time for him to get better."
*****
Spike looked at the calendar hanging on the kitchen wall. Smoke curled up
from the cigarette in the corner of his mouth. He raised the current month to
look at December. Christmas Eve was decorated with red and green squiggles with
the words 'Bronze Party' scrawled across the day in Buffy's handwriting. He
counted the number of days between now and then, then took a deep drag on the
cigarette.
Dropping the calendar page, he picked up the phone and dialed a number he
hadn't used in a long time. It rang and rang, but Spike didn't get annoyed. He
just waited.
"You got money?" a gruff voice said over the line after seventeen rings.
"Five thousand down," Spike replied. "Five after."
"Hit me."
"Romani vengeance curse," Spike said. "I need it altered."
"Copy of the curse, alteration instructions, both in triplicate, and the
money; locker 507, Kennedy Station."
Then the dial tone sounded in Spike's ear.
The blond vampire hung up the receiver and took another deep drag on his
cigarette. He lightly hit a closed fist on the wall next to the phone and let
the smoke curl in his dead lungs. After a moment, he headed back to the bedroom,
knelt on the floor and pulled a shoebox out from under the bed. Opening it, he
took a green floppy disk from the box of miscellaneous items, then returned the
box under the bed.
He stood and walked over to the laptop computer and printer sitting on the
desk in the corner. He moved Buffy's school books and booted up the laptop. A
few minutes later, Spike looked at the printouts, reading over them. He took a
final drag on the cigarette, then stabbed it out.
Spike set the pages on the desk and leaned back in the chair, closing his
eyes. An ache formed in the center of his chest, and he had to fight back the
tears that formed behind his closed lids. His thumb rubbed the plain gold band
on his ring finger of his left hand, and he took a long, shaky breath before
opening his eyes again.
Standing, he grabbed the pages, picked up the paper bag off the bed, and
headed for the front door.
On the biggest shopping day of the year, he had the most important present to buy for Christmas.
A soul.
*****
"Oh wow," Buffy said, staring at the glass figurine in The Music Box. She
reached out carefully and ran the tip of her finger down the frosted surface of
the glass. "I just found my Christmas present for Spike, guys."
"I thought vampires didn't have Christmas," Cordelia said.
"Think you can say that a little louder, C?" Faith asked her.
"We celebrated last year, well, kinda," Buffy said. She moved her foot out to
the side and pointed down. "That's when he gave me the anklet."
"Yeah, and we didn't even know it was Spike who gave it to you," Willow
chided. "You were all Miss Secretive on us."
"I didn't want you to freak," Buffy said in her defense.
"If I remember correctly, you failed," Faith said. "Xand-man and Red here
were of the uber-freakdom."
"But it all worked out fine," Buffy said. "Everyone likes Spike, Spike likes
everyone except for Xander."
Cordelia scowled at her. "Funny."
"I'm married and mated to the greatest man in the world, and I'm the happiest
woman in the world," Buffy said with a huge smile. She picked up the figurine
carefully. "And now, I'm going to be the poorest woman in the world after I get
this. But still the happiest."
*****
Spike set the key to locker 507 in the back corner of the drawer of his
night-stand, then closed it. He stared at the finished wood of the piece of
furniture for a moment before heading to the bathroom to take a shower.
When he got out, he heard Buffy's voice floating from the bedroom as she sang
a Christmas carol. He pressed his lips together into a tight, thin line and
looked into the reflectionless, fogged mirror.
"The snow is falling, it's Christmas Eve
Presents are wrapped under the tree
Is there one for me?
"I only want you for Christmas, baby
I don't need nothing else
I only want you for Christmas, baby
Tie a ribbon around yourself
Oh, tie a ribbon around yourself."
Spike bowed his head, his eyes squeezed shut, a sharp pain in the center of
his chest where the heart that belonged to his Slayer lay hidden. He put his
hands flat on the sink and braced himself upon them, trying to stop his chin
from trembling.
"I ain't gonna write no letter
To send north to the Pole
'Cause what I'm wanting this year
St. Nick don't need to know
"I only want you for Christmas, baby
I don't need nothing else
I only want you for Christmas, baby
Tie a ribbon around yourself
Oh, tie a ribbon around yourself."
The tears slipped from his eyes anyway.
End