Cards Lay Where They Fall

Author Sarafina aka Gifted Spike: sarafina@delcarsdungeon.com
Disclaimer: All Characters belong to Joss and ME.
Summary: Based on season 6 spoilers recieved mid season. IF you are spoiler free DO NOT READ THIS until you've seen the season 6 fianale. No this is NOT what is going to happen, but I have elaborated on sentences I have recieved as spoilers.
Feedback: PLease, PLease, PLEEAAASSEEE.
Beta: Thank you so much Angelic Mexx
Rating: Some Scenes are intended for Mature audiences Only.

Part One

He packed his things. He had very few that mattered and most were of her. A few pictures and some articles of clothing. After everything that had happened this was the only way forward. He clutched the envelope with the tickets in his hand and took one last look at the place he had called home for two years. As he left the crypt he checked his pocket for the letter he was going to leave her. When they were together he always botched up what he wanted to say. He just couldn’t think straight. He tied his bag to the back of the bike and hopped on and headed for her house. He intended to leave the letter in her box, better that way.

~Bugger! She’s outside. Well there’s no help for it now.~ He pulled the bike up to the curb and jumped off. "Slayer."

"Spike I told you to never come around here again. Or are you here to force yourself on me again?" The anger, hurt and sadness resonated in her voice.

"I said I was sorry, Buffy. I know it’s not enough though, that’s why I am leaving." He hung his head and held out the letter. "This is for you."

"Oh and you are sorry about bedding one of my best friend’s fiancé too!" She continued ignoring Spike’s ranting before what he was saying registered. "Leaving?" She straightened her pose "Why? I mean good. I told you to." Her voice softened. "But why?"

He reached a hand up to move the stray hair out of her face and smiled sadly. "It’s all in the note luv. Please let me go without a fight, as much as I love them, not this time, ok?"

"Will you come back?"

"Dunno Pet." He threw his leg up and straddled the bike. "Oh and Buffy Anne Summers? I love you." With that he started the engine and left her standing alone on her front lawn clutching his letter. She looked at the trash she had brought out, then the letter, and considered tossing it out unread but stopped herself. She had to know why. She went in and headed for her room. Dawn was at Janice’s late again tonight. She tore open the envelope and lay on the bed.

Johannesburg? Where was that? She reread the letter twice. Was she too hard on him? No he was Spike. But what if it had been Angel or Riley she had been treating like that. Would they have stayed as long as he did? Or keep trying for her affection? He once said she loved the misery, he was one to talk. Any sane man would have left her, but who said he was sane? She got up off the bed and got ready for patrol, alone. But she had gotten used to that as of late. She had chased him away and he had finally left. She dusted four vamps lost in thought. Why did she feel this way? She was going to miss him. She could tell him anything and he would take it. She could take her frustrations out on him. He was always there. Except now. He was gone. Maybe forever.

She found herself at the door of his crypt. Strike that, of what was his crypt. She pushed the door open and crept inside. It was so quiet. Everything was still there. Like he could walk through the door at any moment and act offended she had barged in again. She wasn’t very nice. But he was Spike. She went down to the lower level. Damage of Riley’s last visit still evident through Spike’s attempt to clean up. There was the bed. His bed. The bed they had shared. The bed had bedded Anya in. It had hurt so bad. Seeing them doing what only she was supposed to do with Spike. He was hers, but she didn’t want anyone to know, he was her dirty little secret. Then she threw him away and he ran into the arms of Xander’s jilted lover. She crawled onto the bed forcing the videotape images from her mind and remembered his arms around her. How safe she felt. How she felt herself letting go and then getting scared. She had to stand alone. Not get hurt again. And this was Spike. She rolled over and curled up.

She must have fallen asleep for a few hours because her cell phone startled her awake. In Spike’s bed. "Hello"

"Buffy. It’s me, Willow. You still on patrol? It’s after two."
"No, I’m at Spike’s"

"Ooooh"

"It’s not that. He left today, he may not come back, ever." Buffy found herself fighting tears she didn’t realize were there.

"Oh. Well come home. Tara’s here. I think everything’s going to be ok. Oh, I mean with us, me and Tara. I am sorry about Spike, but maybe it’s for the best. You know, vampire, evil." Willow was very happy, but tried to have sympathy for her friend.

"I’ll be home in a few, I’m happy for you two." She folded the phone back up and placed it back into her pocket. She went to the edge of the bed and spotted the necklace on the nightstand. She picked it up, put it on and headed home.

Part Two

Despite all my Rage
I am still just a rat in a cage.
-Bullet with butterfly wings, Smashing Pumpkins

Spike disembarked the plane and lit a cigarette; he hefted the carry-on over his shoulder and went to hail a taxi. He glanced at the address on the paper and hoped the driver knew where it was. With him being neutered and all, this was not the city to get lost in. There was a day when he would have walked there just to see how much trouble he could cause. That was before he acquired the soddin’ piece of Initiative technology in his head. That was when he still had his dark princess at his side. When he found a ride and was assured the driver knew where he was going, he leaned he head back and thought about when he first encountered Kopano Abramjee. It was before China. Before the curse. They had come to Africa for Dru. Darla appeased her to keep her quiet. Dru wanted to see the lions and the sharks. The natural born killers, so like themselves. Hunters. Top of the food chain. The city was perfect pickings for creatures such as themselves. The crime, the locals treated as throwaways, no one noticed if they went missing.

One night they had been hunting a high society party, the kind Darla loved, when a fledgling challenged their right to be in his territory. It was funny; here was a vamp, possibly younger than Spike, challenging the great Angelus, Master Vampire. Angelus had actually laughed. Darla had laughed, but it held no emotion. Dru had tittered, William the Bloody stood stock still, smirk firmly in place.

"Do you have any idea who you are challenging?" William had boasted in hopes that when he found out who he was threatening, the kid would run. "This is Angelus, the scourge of Europe."

"You’re a long way from Europe."

Angelus’ hand shot out with lightening speed and grabbed the man. His amber eyes accentuated Angelus’ predatory smile. Darla leaned in. "Just kill him so we can go to the party." Angelus’ hand rose to slash out the throat of the impudent fledgling, but stopped when Dru clapped her hands. "Can we play with him, Daddy, please? It would be so fun; we could feed him to the Sharks, the pretty fish who jump at the moon. Please Daddy can we? The sounds he will make will be like music." Dru spun and danced. Angelus smiled at her delight and leaned in close to his challenger. "Looks like Drusilla wants to play." He paused and his eyes glittered at Darla’s irritation. "And Daddy’s gonna let her. Seems as though we are making a trip to the coast, to a little known place called Seal Island. We’re going to see some Yompers." He threw the vamp to Spike to hold. He watched as Angelus and Darla exchanged harsh words, she threw her hands in the air, but followed them.

As the moved towards the coast, Angelus held all of Dru’s attention. He was encouraging her, pawing at her, kissing her. Darla looked as though she might stake them both if she had one handy. When they had reached their destination, they found a hotel to hole up in for the day. Their leader chained his victim up in the corner of the room. Drusilla and Darla had grabbed them some food and they fed their prisoner so he would be able to live through the torture longer. Drusilla pulled a jar out of her trunk. "Yes my pretties, Mummy’s got some food for you."

She carried the jar over to the vampire who had been very quiet up until now. "What’s your whore getting ready to do, Daddy?" The prisoner struggled slightly against his bonds, eying the jar and then eying Angelus.

Spike wanted to rip his spine out for the whore comment but Angelus just ignored it. Dru picked the leeches out of the jar and placed them one by one tenderly on the freshly fed vampire’s genitals. He winced but did not cry out. Angelus handed her a cat-o-nine tails that he pulled out of his belongings. She whipped him for what must have been an hour.

Darla had retired to her adjoining room, disgusted with the display of affection between her childe and his. Drusilla became tired of the whipping and went over and licked the borrowed blood off of the young prisoner. Her mouth covered and dripping with blood she threw herself into a deep kiss with her sire. Spike was getting so sick of this, last time this went on for days until Darla had put a stop to it. Drusilla had pouted for weeks afterward.

The torture and displays of affection continued with Angelus finally taking Dru right in front of Spike and the prisoner. Spike wanted to protest, but there was nothing he could do.

The prisoner shouted at Angelus. "Are you quite done? As exciting as this is for me, having your bitch beat me, then screw you, I really need to get back."

He had balls this one. His shouting had awakened Darla who came storming out of the room. She took one look at Drusilla and her childe still entwined together on the floor and grabbed them both by the hair and drug them into her room. Soon shouts and bangs had turned to moans of passion from both women. Spike was livid.

"What’s your name?"

"Kopano Abramjee."

"You gonna run next time you see Angelus on the street?"

"You think I’m gonna have the chance?"

Spike weakened one of the links on the chain, but did not break it. He then backed away. "If you work fast you can get away. Oh and remember." He held Kopano’s face in his hand squeezed tightly. "She is NOT a whore!"

"Not to look a gift horse in the mouth but what’s she doing with him then?" Kopano worked hard on the weakened link.

Spike tried to shrug the comment off, but it hurt "He’s her sire, that’s how it is."

"Oh."

"Remember, I do this to get to Angelus, I could give a toss about you."

The link snapped and Kopano ran out the door pausing to say, "I am in your debt, as long as I live."

Spike was pulled out of his reverie by the taxi drive demanding his 100 ZAR. Spike gave him his money and headed for the door. Nice place. He knocked and waited. A large Dark skinned man opened the door. "Yes?"

"I’m here for Mr. Abramjee"

"And you are?"

"Look he knows I’m coming, mate." He fished the letter that was sent out of his jacket. "Give him this, I’ll wait."

Part Three

One step closer to the edge and I’m about to break! -Linkin Park, One Step

"Hey, Wil, I’m home" Buffy opened the door and saw Willow sitting up waiting. Tara smiled a quiet smile from her place beside her lover. "Sorry I worried you."

"Just as long as you’re ok. Didn’t you say Spike was gone? Did he say where?" Buffy was amazed at how animated Willow was at this time of night.

"Yeah, Johannesburg." She sat down in the chair, the one he used to sit in. She absently began fiddling with the necklace.

"Wow! Spike went to South Africa? Did he say why?" Tara noticed the necklace but chose not to say anything and smiled a little bigger.

"To get the chip removed."

"Oh I am so sorry."

"Are you, Willow? I mean the way you guys reacted when you found out I was sleeping with him I’d of thought you’d be ecstatic! " The frustration poured out of Buffy and fell full force on her best friend "You of all people should have understood, but no, it was Tara! She was the only one who didn’t judge. " She threw herself out of the chair and stomped up to her room.

"You knew?" Willow gave her lover a questioning look

"Yes, she talked to me a while back. Are you mad?"

"No, not really. A little hurt she couldn’t tell me, but I understand why." Willow stood up and held a hand out to Tara "Come on, let’ go to bed." The couple went to their room and closed the door.

Warren spotted the Witch and a blond enter the bedroom. The position of the camera did not allow him to see her face. ~It must be Buffy, the witch’s girlfriend moved out months ago. After Buffy the witch is next, I want my ray gun back.~

In the after glow of the rekindling of their relationship, Tara lay sleeping and Willow got up to use the bathroom. From down the hall Willow heard a stifled scream and banging. She hurried to finish and ran out bathroom closing her robe. The sounds were coming from her room, their room. She ran to the room and threw the door open. A dark haired figure went out the window. Tara lay motionless on the bed. Willow ran to her side and tried to wake her up to no avail.

Willow’s wail of anguish woke up Buffy and Dawn who came into the room. Willow was cradling Tara and rocking back and forth. "I can bring her back, like I did you, Buffy. I don’t know where I’ll get another urn, but I can do this." She got up and began typing furiously on her laptop.

Buffy went over to Tara "She’s dead."

"I can get her back. Just need to find another way to…"

Buffy placed her hand on her friend’s shoulder. "What if she doesn’t want to come back?"

"I just got her back, I can’t loose her!" Willow shrugged Buffy off and went back to the frantic typing. Buffy tried to pull Willow away but was flung across the room. Willow’s eyes were complete ebon. "Get out!" Dawn backed out of the room. "Get out!" Buffy ushered Dawn out quickly. The door slammed shut, Buffy tried the handle but the door would not budge. In a hushed voice Buffy told Dawn to get her the phone. She dialed frantically ~So many numbers, how do they keep track of them all?~ She though absentmindedly during the rings. "You’ve reached the Giles residence, please leave a message." She hung up the phone. What was she going to do? She couldn’t reach Giles. Spike was gone. Maybe she should call Xander, to keep an eye on Dawn if nothing else. Yes I’ll call Xander.

Dawn watched her sister dial and talk to Xander. She was numb inside. Tara was always so good to her. And now she was gone. Like her Mom. Willow was using magic again. It all so scary. She hugged herself and decided to go to her room and get out of the way.

Xander arrived to find Buffy sitting on the floor, leaning against Willow’s door. Buffy looked up, she had been crying. "She’s chanting. Oh, Xander how could anyone do this? Tara never hurt anyone. She was our friend. " Xander sat down next to her and hugged her. The chanting stopped and all went quiet. Buffy and Xander both stood up and waited. Something was going to happen, it was too quiet. "Wil?" Buffy called. The door flew open with such force that it snapped at the hinges. Willow hung in the air. "I need more power. I am going to kill him. Must see Rack. Warren will PAY!" she flew down the stairs and out the door. Xander looked at the body then at Buffy "You want me to call the ambulance?"

Part Four

Free to Decide, I’m free to decide. -The Cranberries

Kopano sat across the table from Spike chuckling. "So you’re telling me that because I got away, they dropped YOU in the waters off Seal Island? How did you survive?"

Spike cigarette dangled from his mouth as he studied his cards. "Apparently the buggers don’t ‘jump at the moon’. They only hunt at dawn. Angelus did make me swim the whole bleedin’ way back to shore though. Dru was right happy to be with me for a while after that. Seems ‘grandmother’ had put a fright in her while on the boat." Spike looked up from his hand "So you owe me big time."

"Seems to me as long as I could survive the erotic torture fest, I would have been ok." Kopano leveled a look back to Spike. Then laid his hand face down on the table "But I did give my word, and yours is the oldest debt I still owe. My surgeons can remove it."

"Right then, why are we playing cards? Let’s get to it." Spike lay his cards down, face up, no longer interested in playing.

Kopano eyed the cards. "The Jack and the Queen of hearts, interesting."

"’s more interesting if I had the king and ace to go along with them and the ten there."

"The Jack, upside down like that, some would say, could mean a death of one life, a major change. And the queen of hearts, well, they say when it comes up true love is bound to show up."

"Bullocks. That’s crap and you know it. Let’s just get this over with so I can go back to being Spike the Slayer Killer."

"Whatever you say, when this is over we’ll have ourselves a lekker jol to celebrate your return." Kopano lead the way out of the room.

"A what what?" Spike followed.

"Oh sorry, ‘A right good party’. Is that better?"

Spike was introduced to the surgeons, handed a hospital gown and herded into a little room to change. He did it eagerly and waited for them to return. Why did he trust his life to this man he barely knew? He was desperate. Desperation does strange things to men. And vampires. As he mused his situation he drifted off to sleep.

When he awoke, there was a bandage on his head and it hurt. It hurt pretty damned bad. Not Glory bad, not even Buffy bad, and she had roughed him up right good hadn’t she, but it definitely hurt.

"Howzit, Spike. I’m surprised you’re awake already. How do you feel?"

An unknown little man was talking to him while looking into his eyes with a light and looking at some machines he was hooked up to. Why was he hooked up to machines? He didn’t have anything to monitor, did he? "My bleedin’ head hurts, you Pillock, how do you think I feel?"

"You can talk, good. Good."

That got his attention. "What do you mean I can talk? Of course I can talk!"

"Well there was a chance, with the amount of tissue we had to remove, that some functions may have been lost."

"What sodding functions? What are you going on about?"

"As he said, Spike, it was a pretty difficult procedure, there was a chance you might not have, um how do you say? Come back exactly the same." Kopano stood in the doorway.

"You didn’t say anything about that, mate!" Spike pulled the wires off and pushed off the bed and fought the dizziness that descended upon him as he rose to his feet. He steadied himself and stalked over to his host. He grabbed the vampire and slammed him into the wall with all the strength he could muster. "You did this and knew there was a chance I could have not come back whole? Bits of me gone with that stupid chip?"

"You never asked."

Spike fought to not shred this guy. Kopano’s smugness infuriated him. Then Spike blacked out.

When he came to again he was in a room he didn’t recognize. He sat up to orient himself better. It was definitely a hotel room. "How the bloody hell did I…?" The phone rang just then and he stared at it before he answered it. "Hello?’

"Spike, you have been moved to a safer location, for me. My debt has been paid but your welcome has been worn out." The phone clicked then went dead."

"Don’t need you any more, any how!" spike yelled into the phone then slammed it down. "Feeling a bit peckish, I think I have a dinner date with a happy meal."

He headed out into the night to look for his first victim in years. He searched the crowd. The hotel was in the tourist district. There were families, he ruled them out immediately. There was a couple over there that were enjoying themselves and had no clue of their surroundings. He followed them for a ways. Then he heard her name. Dawn. He stopped dead in his tracks and began search the crowd again for another target. He followed her through the crowds. She was alone and walking fast. Trying to get home, he figured. He jumped and pulled her into the alley he had been waiting. Her eyes widened in fear, but she did not scream. She did not beg. She just began digging in her purse. She held out her money in a shaking hand. "It’s all I have, now please let me go." Her voice was quiet. He took the money and put it in his pocket. "No, Pet, I need more than just your money." She screamed as he morphed into his vampiric visage. He crushed her body to his and sank his teeth into her neck. Her life fluid spilled into his throat and he drained her dry. He wiped the edges of his mouth on his sleeve. "Good to the last drop."

Then he looked at the body, her red hair spread in a halo around her head. Red hair. Red. The woman brought pictures of the Wiccan into his mind. Willows face imposed over the nameless corpse. "What the bleedin’ Hell is going on?" He turned and moved quickly away from the body. Back in the hotel room he couldn’t get the pictures of Red out of his head. But it wasn’t her. It was just a nameless woman. Who probably had a kid. Great. Now she was Joyce. What was wrong with him? Did he have a soul like the poof now? No. But he did feel bad. How could he, a vampire, feel bad about what came natural? He reeked of humanity. Ok…He could fight it or embrace it. Distance himself or try to go with the flow. Could he live with not being the Big Bad? Hundreds of decisions and thoughts went on deep into the day.

Part Five

Black Day
Stormy Night
No Love
No hope in sight
-Prince, The Cross, Sign O' the Times

Willow found Rack’s place with no trouble, it seemed like a beacon to her heightened senses. Her anger and grief clouded her usually timid demeanor. She slammed through the door and headed straight for the back room, ignoring the protests of those who had been waiting. Rack was in mid session with some one. "Session’s done Rack, it’s my turn."

The stringy haired warlock turned to eye her, then broke connection with the boy and shooed him out. "I knew you couldn’t stay away." He walked forward and grabbed a handful of her hair. "I should kill you for killing my pet though."

The force built up inside Willow and slammed Rack against the wall with such force it cracked. Her revulsion and impatience caused her to lash out. "You will give me what I ask, and you will be quick about it!" The anger was overwhelming.

He wiped the blood off of his lip where he had bitten it upon impact. He stood up and narrowed his eyes at her. "I do not know who has gotten on your bad side, I have tasted the power you have, and I am glad it is not me." He reached for her again, but did not touch her.

She was engulfed in crimson and black swirls. Where there had been outer space and meadows there were now volcanoes and tsunamis. She broke the connection herself. Rack lay on the floor blood running out of his ears and nose "I said make it quick. You didn’t listen." She stepped over his prone body to continue her quest for her lover’s killer.

She cast a spell to locate the man who murdered Tara. She had only one thought and it was ‘Get Warren’. The spell led her in a straight path that anyone could have followed. She laughed at his naiveté as she flew towards the beacon. He was in a stolen bus driving fast down the main street of town. Her triumph of finding him hardened her resolve. She closed in on the vehicle. She paced it and ripped the doors off in one gesture of her hand.

Buffy and Xander ran around the corner to see Willow step onto the moving vehicle. The bus screeched to a halt and tipped but did not go over. Willow levitated the screaming man outside the bus she walked out her eyes still black pools of tar. "Why? Why did you kill her? What did she do to you? She was mine again and you took her!" Flashes of Tara’s smile and the adoring way she always tried to hide it with her hand sprung to Willow’s mind. She heard the titter of her laughter. The love light that shone in her eyes. Her dead eyes. And this was the man that killed that light and silenced the laughter.

"I had to kill …" He began but with a single tear sliding down her face she ripped off his head with a twist of her hands before he could finish. Instead of blood, sinew and muscle, though, there were wires and twisted metal.

She walked over and picked up the head. She was cold and empty inside. She examined it and caught the optic feed wire that sent images back to the real perpetrator. She reconnected just those wires. "Warren" She looked straight into its eyes. "I will find you. You will pay." She threw the head behind her and recast her locator spell.

Buffy caught the head. "Wil, please, I need to talk to you." She handed it to Xander who dropped it. "Willow, please, we love you. We know it hurts."

Willow stopped and turned to face them. She wanted to go and cry on her friend's shoulder. Let her say everything was going to be all right. But then she might be convinced not to do this. She had a date with a killer. The killer of her life, for Tara was her life, her all, her everything. Her voice was quiet, almost inaudible as she faced her friend that had never known lasting love and the man who stood his fiancé up at the altar. "You know nothing." Then Willow resumed her course.

Part Six.

Hello me…Meet the real me
And my misfit way of life
A dark black past is my
most valued possession
---
Bloodstains on my hands and
I don’t know where I’ve been
Once you’ve committed me
Now you’ve acquitted me
Claiming your validity.
----Excepts from Sweating Bullets by Megadeth from Countdown to Destruction

Spike sat in the bar drinking himself into oblivion. What had they done to him? Not Abramjee and those doctors, but the Slayer and her friends. Before he came to Sunnydale he was happy, he had his dark princess, he was evil and he knew who he was. The events following Prague turned his whole unlife upside down. He was never one to dwell in the past though, so going forward, this is where he stood. He could kill again, but it made him think of people that barely tolerated him. He could just suck it up and deal and eventually get over it. Or he could give in to his limitation for now and see if Buffy would admit her feelings. Would him having no chip make a difference to her? Probably not. "Bloody women." He said aloud to no one in particular but a man at the end of the bar raised his glass and nodded in agreement.

Spike grabbed the bottle the bartender had left for him, got up and walked out, he thought better when he paced. He had to suss out what he wanted to do. As he emerged into the alley he heard sounds of a struggle and muffled cries. He located the sound behind the dumpster where he saw a man thrusting into a woman, one hand over her mouth and a knife against her throat with the other. Spike grabbed the man and threw him off. As soon as the mans hand left her mouth the woman’s screams escaped at full force "Rape! Help me! He was …I said no…He came out of nowhere..please..help me!" the woman was frantically scrambling back and pulling her knees tight to her chest. She was unconsciously trying to cover herself with her torn clothing.

Spike turned to the bastard who had hurt the woman. "What is wrong with you? Don’t you understand when a lady says no?" He winced inwardly thinking of Buffy and how he didn’t listen. "Give you some kinda power trip? Can’t get your rocks off any other way? Give me one reason I shouldn’t kill you now." He slammed him up against the outside wall of the bar.

"She was asking for it. Look at her clothes, her hair. She wanted it. She just couldn’t say it. Nice girls can’t ask for it. She was saying no because she was…" His sentence was cut off as Spike removed his vocal cords with one swipe of his hand. The smell of the copper and iron in the blood on top of the anger forced his fangs to descend. He fed without another thought.

The woman’s eyes glazed over as she watched the scene before her and then fainted. Spike let the body fall and saw the woman’s limp body slumped over. He reached down and checked for a pulse. Good. He went back to the drained body and took his wallet and watch. He stared for a minute, then after being convinced no disturbing visions were going to happen went back into the bar.

"You need to call an ambulance, mate. There’s a hurt man and woman in the alley." Spike thumbed in the direction he just left then went out the other exit and headed back to the hotel.

On his way back he stopped in a convenience store and bought more liquor. Once inside his room he sat down on the floor his back leaned against the bed. "I’ve turned into a poof, a bloody nancy boy is what I am. I can’t believe it. Me. William the Bloody. Mr. Creative with railroad spikes has become….pathetic. Not even Slayers lap dog Pathetic..just plain bloody pathetic." He threw the empty bottle across the room and watched it shatter into tiny pieces like his life. He was the bottle…she was the wall. "How bloody poetic William." He snorted at the thought. He opened the new bottle and took a long drought. He hoisted himself off the floor and lay down on the bed. He kicked his boots off and let them thud to the floor. He threw himself into deep self pity and finished the bottle. He sat up to get the third bottle and watched himself reach for the phone instead. Watched himself punch the familiar numbers he rarely dialed, but had memorized.

"Hello…Hello…If you don’t talk I’m going to hang up."

"It’s me Pet."

"Spike? I thought you were in Africa"

"I am."

"Look Spike, I don’t have time for this, there’s some really deep kimshe hitting the fan right now and…"

"Another apocalypse? You can handle it."

Buffy took a deep breath "Tara’s dead."

Spike felt his stomach knot up. She was just there, making fun of his ‘cramp’. Giving knowing smirks and looks at him and Buffy. And now she’s gone. He swallowed the lump in his throat. "How?"

"Warren."

"That punk? How the hell he get to her, she was a damned good witch."

"Nobody saw, Willow was in the bathroom, the rest of us were asleep."

Spike eyes teared up. "They were together?"

"First night and Warren got her." The tears could be heard in her voice.

"How’s Red taking it?"

"That’s our crisis. She has gone completely ballistic. She went to look for Rack. Then we found her as she found Warren. It was a ‘bot. She tore it’s head off. Hasn’t been home for three days, Spike. We are so worried, we can’t find Warren, we can’t find Willow." In a quiet voice she continued "And we have to bury a friend." That finally broke the dam and the sobs made Spike wish he could reach out and hold her.

When she finally calmed down she said. "Is it done?"

"What?"

"Is the chip gone?"

"Yes"

"Are you…um evil?"

"Always, luv, but seriously apparently this puppy has become a picky eater."

"Huh? Oh never mind, Spike I need you to come back."

"I’ve waited a long time to hear you say you need me."

"Spike, I don’t have time for this, are coming or not?"

"Not at the moment, but if you…"

"Spike!!"

"Yes, luv, I am on my way." He pulled out the wallet and counted the money. "I just need to round up some more cash before I can make the flight."

"Spike….." the silence said what her voice could not find the words to say.

"Anytime for you, Pet. Anytime."

Part Seven

Run.
Run Away. Hide.
You will die tired.
One thousand deaths.

Buffy entered the room and sat at the table. She looked around while she waited for him to be brought in. The room was stark except for the table and two chairs. Light filtered through the small window set high in the wall. She was out of options. She hoped this panned out.

The door opened and Jonathon was escorted in and handcuffed to the table. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Buffy felt sorry for the boy, he was always the weirdness magnet in school and now he fell in with Warren. He and Andrew had been arrested for stealing and got six months in County Jail for it.

“What did Warren do this time?” That was the only reason Buffy would visit him.

“Killed Tara.” The words sounded hollow to Buffy, but they had just made the funeral arrangements earlier that day. She had to call Tara’s dad who stated he had better things to do than deal with the body of his traitor daughter.

Jonathon’s eyes widened to the size of saucers. “Why?”

“We think the ‘bot was sent for me, but something went wrong.” She hung her head and placed a hand on her forehead. “Willow’s out for his blood now.”

“I am SO sorry Buffy. It wasn’t supposed to go this far. I should have turned him in for Katrina, but no. After they..I mean we made it look like you did it; they put me on house arrest. I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere. It had gone too far and I couldn’t get out of it. I am sorry Buffy.”

“I need you to tell me where he would be hiding, Jonathon. Willow’s been missing for five days. She is going to kill him; I have no doubt of that. So if we can get to him first maybe we can stop her from doing something she’ll regret later.”

Jonathon nodded his head. “Warren always talked about his uncle’s cabin just across the Oregon state line. Maybe he’s there; he also had me teach him a few protection spells. He’s probably got that placed rigged so tight right now that he’ll know if she’s within 5 miles of the place. Do you have a pen and some paper?” He glanced at the guard who nodded to show it was ok. Sean was in their graduating class in high school. He knew if Buffy was here, with the weirdo, it was important.

Buffy finished digging through her purse and pulled out a pen and something to write on. She handed them to Jonathon. He scribbled the address where the cabin was supposed to be, turned over the paper and scribbled something else. “When you get her, you must do this binding spell on her, you must have a picture of her, a lock of hair, and white ribbon. You must say it nine times and you have three people doing the chant at the same time.”

“All right Jonathon. Thank You.“ She took the paper and pen and stuffed them into her purse. “I have to go now.” She got up and Sean showed her the way out.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Willow had reached her limit even after the juicing up she had gotten from Rack. She had to rest, so she could do what had to be done. She lay down in the woods, using the last of her energy to cast a protection spell and drifted off to sleep.

Tara smiled and gently put her arm around Willow. “Stop this Willow.”

“But Baby, he took you from me. He killed the light in my life.”

“If you start down this path, you will not come back the same.”

“No matter what path we choose we are never the same.”

Tara looked into Willow’s eyes. “There is no light or hope where you are going, please turn back before you loose yourself Willow Rosenburg.”

“Tara please come back. I need you. There is no me without you.” Willow was crying.

“Yes, Willow, there is. You are Willow the Brilliant. Willow the Big Hearted, and Willow the Beautiful. You were all these things before me and with me, and are without me. Please do not stain yourself with the blood of another. Not for me, not for anyone.” Tara’s smile was warm and reassuring. “Will you stop for me?”

Willow faltered, her sad smile faded and anger shone back in her eyes. “This is exactly why he must pay, Tara. You kept me grounded. Now you are gone. He took what was mine. You forgot Willow the Bad-Ass Witch in that list of who I am.”

A tear slid down Tara’s face as she turned her back on Willow and disappeared into the mist. Willow reached for her but was rooted to the spot. Then there was nothing. Willow slept for 24 hrs regaining her energy and strength.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Warren finished putting up the last of the trip wires around the cabin. He ran his hand nervously through his dark hark “Shit, shit, shit and shit.” This wasn’t the way it was supposed to happen. If the two idiots hadn’t gotten arrested maybe the plan would have been flawless. What was Tara doing there anyways? Why had she come back? Not only was Willow a witch, but she had figured out the ray gun just by studying the specs for a few minutes. He was in deep shit now. She was gunning straight for him he was 100 percent sure of that after her message through the ‘bot. He went inside and began his endless vigil in front of the monitors.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Buffy returned home to get the few things the spell required. She walked in and found Xander at the table helping Dawn with her homework. “Hey guys, we hit jackpot, I got a spell to stop Willow, it takes three people, Oh and Warrens in Oregon. Um..Xandman, can you drive us there?”

“Buffy, you just drove to the jailhouse.”

“I know, but this is way further and please?”

“Ok, I’ll drive” Xander relented as always.

After she explained the details of the visit with Jonathan, Buffy turned to her sister. “Dawn see if you can go to Janice’s..”

“No, I’m coming with. Where else you gonna get the three?”

“Let’s see, Niblet, There’s the slayer, the whelp and me.” Spike appeared in the kitchen doorway shrugging off his blanket, still smoking a little.

“Spike!” Dawn launched herself into his arms.

Xander folded his arms. “Why is dead boy back, I thought you said he was playing Ghost in the Darkness.

“I asked him to help us with Willow, just deal ok? Dawn I need you to go find me some white ribbon, Xander I need you to go in the basement and find a recent picture of Willow.” As they went to get the items, Buffy moved towards Spike. She could see the red line just peeking out from under his hair. She reached up to touch it but stopped herself. “Does it still hurt?’

“No.” By the look on her face he could tell she knew he was lying. “Well ok, a little.” A smirk spread across his face. “I see you’ve picked up some new jewelry.”

Buffy’s hand went to the necklace as her face reddened. “Oh, well I can give it back” She paused “I was just keeping it safe, you can’t just leave gold laying on the table beside your bed, anyone can just pick it up.”

“Yeah, like Slayers snooping in my crypt while I’m away. Keep it. It suits you.”

Just then the other two showed up with the things they were sent to find. “I call dibs on the front seat.” Dawn called as she ran down the stairs.

“I really think you should sit in the back seat with Spike, Dawn.” Buffy did not want to be that close to him for that long, trapped in the back seat of a car.

Dawn pouted. “But I called dibs.”

“Oh, all right.” Buffy sighed.

Part Eight

Take a look to the sky just before you die
It is the last time you will
Blackened roar massive roar fills the crumbling sky
Shattered goal fills his soul with a ruthless cry
Stranger now, are his eyes, to this mystery
He hears the silence so loud
Crack of dawn, all is gone except the will to be
Now they will see what will be, blinded eyes to see

--For Whom the Bell Tolls, Metallica, Ride the Lightening

Dawn bounced out to the car and jumped into the front seat. Spike wrapped up in his blanket sprinted and dove into the back seat and lay on the floorboards. Buffy went to leave then ran into the upstairs bathroom to grab the brush. She got into the back seat, not being careful of Spike. “Hey Slayer! Watch your feet.”

She smiled and looked down as she stepped on his hand under the blanket. “You’re right! It is much more exciting to watch.”

Spike mumbled something that ended in “…stupid bint.”

They drove off in silence for about a half-hour then Dawn punched Xander in the arm. “Slug Bug” as she pointed to a passing Volkswagen.

“Ow, so that’s how your gonna play.” A playful grin spread across Xander’s face.

Buffy stretched across the seat absently rubbing Spike hand through the blanket. He had fallen asleep cocooned in the blanket. She felt as though maybe they could do this, now that he was here. She was reassured by his presence. The sun would be down soon and he would be the most annoying person she could think of, so she settled in for a nap herself.

Spike lay there pretending to sleep relishing her touch. Dreading the conversation that would inevitably come up later. How was he going to tell her he killed? He could lie, but somewhere, somehow, she would find out and he would get it worse. No, the truth was best. He allowed himself to drift off to sleep, not knowing when the next time he’d be able to would be.

Willow approached the outskirts of the property. She followed the wires with her eyes and smirked. She cocked her head to the side in awe at the pure genius of her victim. “Too bad I have to kill you, Warren.” With that she raised her hands in a sudden angry motion. All the wires began to glow and rise into the air. Effectively setting off every trap and alarm that her prey had set.

A myriad of sounds erupted from speakers set about the cabin. Warren watched helplessly as his stalker casually strode toward his location. He ran to the closet in the bathroom and hid. He prayed that the spells Jonathan had given him would be strong enough, but knew that they would not be.

They had stopped at a rest stop for potty breaks and some grub. “When Jonathan said just across the border did he mean from California or from Washington?” Xander rubbed the back of his neck and stretched as he got out of the car.

“At least you didn’t have to be stuffed in the backseat like so much bloody luggage.” Spike perched himself on a picnic table and lit a cigarette.

“You’re the only one who has a bad case of solar-itis.” Xander shot back

Spike was making a mock face as the two girls approached. “Hey look, they didn’t kill each other while we were gone, that’s a plus right?” Dawn said hopefully.

“Yeah, but by Spike’s face, I’d say they aren’t playing nice though.” Buffy sighed.

Dawn went over and grabbed Xander’s arm. “Come on let’s go get some food.” They started to head for the fast food place when Xander turned around. “You guys coming?”

“Naw, just bring me back A burger and a large fries.” Buffy waved them on.

After they got out of earshot Buffy sat next Spike. “So you gonna tell me what happened?”

Spike groaned inwardly. “Can’t it wait until we get Red back home safe?”

“What if she kills you, or me?”

“It can’t be that bad, Pet, she would never kill you.”

“You didn’t see her Spike, She’s not the same, something snapped and I’m not sure we can ever get the old Willow back.” She began to cry, the stress of the past few days got the better of her. After she was done she looked at her hands. “Thank you. For some reason, I have to be strong for them, but I can be human with you. I don’t have to be the almighty slayer. Give me good fight any day but this emotional head games shit that has been bombarding me these past few years has just gotten old.”

He nodded and marveled once again at how much her hair shined in the moonlight. “Don’t let it get to you, luv, that’s what the powers want, for you to give in. Just remember you are the best.”

He took her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers. “Let’s do this and I’ll tell you when we get back safe and sound.”

“One burger and one large fries, delivered.” Xander plunked down on the bench and handed Buffy the bag. Dawn sat across from Xander and proceeded to fix her salad just the way she liked it, pulling out the radishes and cutting the tomatoes into bite sized chunks. After she applied the salad dressing she took the unwanted radishes and threw them over her shoulder.

“Dawn!”

“What?! They’re biodegradable.”

“Dawn, Move!” Buffy spun and vaulted off of the table at the unsuspecting vamp pulling radishes out of his hair. The force of her tackle knocked him off his feet and she landed on top of him and began pummeling him. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Spike stop two more from saving their buddy. She reached into her waistband and staked the one she had been tussling with. She yanked one off of Spike and kicked him in the face. He stumbled back and she hit him twice with two roundhouse punches. He thought he saw an opening and went for a gut shot but was mistaken when she grabbed his hand and twisted it until she heard the elbow pop.

“Bloody hell, Slayer, Stop playing and stake him already, we need to get back on the road.”

She flipped over her challenger’s head and staked him. “Fine, take away all my fun.” She pouted.

“Hey, Harris you want me to drive? You look like you could use a break.”

Xander eyed Spike suspiciously then “Ok, but if you wreck my car, I’ll stake you.”

“I swear, you guys need to come up with better threats, that one is so worn out.” Spike took the keys and slid into the drivers seat.

“Dibs” Buffy’s spirits were definitely lifted since the vamps showed up.

Xander and Dawn both looked at her.

“What? I hate the back seat.” She blushed a little.

Part Nine

Then they watch the progress he makes
The Good and the Evil which path will he take
Both of them trying to manipulate
The use of his powers before it's too late

--Seventh Son of a Seventh Son, Iron Maiden, Seventh Son of a Seventh Son

Willow hovered in the doorway, energy crackling around her, a deadpan look upon her face. Warren marveled at her beauty and her genius. She had figured out every trap he had set and now was ready to incur her wrath upon him. If things had been different, they would have made an awesome couple. Kind of like the Joker and Harley Quinn. It would have been spectacular.

Warren started thinking fast. “You know, we could have made an awesome pair you and I.”

Willow showed no emotion, so he pressed on. “We are both very intelligent, and you have the magic thing going for you. We could have made the world bow at our feet.”

Willow alit to the floor. She smiled and leveled her gaze into his eyes. The sweet tone belied the anger running through her veins. “But you forget, Warren, You have extra equipment I don’t need.”

As the energy bolts coursed through his body his last thought was “This must be how Luke and Vader fell when Emperor Palpatine did this to them.”

Buffy pulled the rearview mirror to face her. She touched up her lipstick as she looked at Dawn sleeping in the backseat. What possessed her to bring Dawn along? Her mother would so freak if she knew she was putting Dawn in danger.

“Luv, I kind of need that to drive.” Spike pulled her away from her thoughts as he readjusted the mirror and she stuck her tongue out at him. “Don’t do that unless you plan to use it, Pet.” She rolled her eyes.

She watched the street lights go by then asked. ”You going to tell me what happened over there or what?”

“Buffy, can’t it wait?”

“No. I’m bored. And if you sing that stupid song one more time I’m gonna scream.”

“But The White Stripes is one of my favorite new bands.” With that he burst into song. “Fell in love with a girl/fell in love once and almost completely/she's in love with the world/but sometimes these feelings can be so misleading/she turns and says "are you alright?"/I said "I must be fine cause my heart's still beating".

Buffy groaned. ”Please not again.”

Spike picked the drum beat out on the steering wheel grinned and sang a little louder, but not enough to wake the backseat passengers.” My left brain knows that/all love is fleeting/she's just looking for something new/and I said it once before/but it bears repeating.”

“Quit stalling and tell me.” She decided to change tactics. She stuck out her bottom lip and let it tremble a little. She batted her eyes. “Please?”

It was Spike’s turn to groan. “Slayer, don’t do that. I have no defense for that face.”

Buffy bounced in the seat “I know. So spill.”

Spike sighed, “You’re not going to like it.”

“Why does that not surprise me?" Buffy crossed her arms and stared at the road.

“Look you asked. I think it should wait.”

“Spill or I’ll…”

“What? Stake me? Puhlease. Get a new tune luv. I’ve got this one memorized.”

“Just tell me, if you love me you’ll tell me.”

He shot her a look of pure contempt. “Did you and Dru have a little talk or do you women just get a bloody little handbook at age ten “How to torture Men and Bend them to Your Will?”

“No, but that book sounds like it would come in handy.”

“You’ve learned all tricks already from the look of things.” He rolled down the window and lit his cigarette. It took him an hour to get to the part about being dumped at the hotel.

“Ok, so this guy helped you, but didn’t tell you it was risky. I wonder.” Spike did not like that look the Slayer just got in her eye. “What other ‘functions’ may have been lost in that surgery.” Her hand snaked across his lap to the center. She unbuckled her seatbelt and slid close to him and played with that special spot behind his ear.

“Buffy, stop it, I’m trying to drive.” He made no move to push her off and tried his best to concentrate on the road.

She was getting the effect she was looking for she noted as his jeans stretched tight over the rising bulge. She slid back over to her side of the seat and buckled herself back in. “At least we know it works now.”

“You are such a tease Buffy!”

“Am not”

“Then what in the bloody hell did you just do?”

“Tested your functions” Her cocky grin actually rivaled one his best.

He reached over and fondled her chest until he could feel the nipple poking through her clothes. He then pulled away.

“Hey!”

“Just checking functions, Luv.”

She slugged him in the arm.

He slugged he back and as he did the car slid off into a ditch.

“Now look what you did!” Buffy yelled

“Excuse Me. Can someone tell me why my car is in a ditch?” Xander asked groggily from the backseat.

“Ow! I hit my head on the back of the seat. Geeze, Spike, get your driver’s license out of a Wheetabix box?” Dawn held a hand to her head and Xander examined it for any cuts.

Buffy got out of the car and slammed the door. She stormed over to the driver’s side and yanked the door open. She hauled Spike out. “What the hell did you think you were doing? You could have hurt Dawn”

~Cor. She is so beautiful when she’s angry.~ Spike thought. Her nostrils flaring. The way a fire lights up behind her eyes and she becomes so animated. Her cheeks get a little red and the pounding of heart intensifies just so much. He pulled her to him and kissed her. ~She is going to kick my ass for this, but it’s worth it.~

She pressed harder against him, feeling the effects of her teasing pressing back. ~Damn straight I was teasing. Got to reel ‘em and keep ‘em coming back for more.~ she unconsciously stuck her hands into his back pockets and pulled him still closer. Just then Spike broke the kiss. “No time for the in and out, luv, I’m just here to read the meter.” He pointed to a red glowing meter suspended in the air. “I think we’ve found Red.” He began following the wires back to the cabin.

Part Ten

Buffy opened the door slowly and gagged at the stench the erupted from inside. She held her sleeve over her nose to block some of the smell. Dawn got one whiff and ran for the bushes to empty the contents of her stomach. Xander fought the wave of nausea that rolled on him.

“I haven’t smelled that smell in ages.” Spike reminisced. “Dru wanted to her hear the music a burning man made. So we burnt him. He screamed for hours. She danced. What?!” He stopped when he caught Buffy’s look. Then he grinned. “Evil, remember?”

“Some days, I’d like to forget. That was not a good picture. Burned him huh?” She forced herself deeper into a cabin. “So we’re looking for crispy Warren.”

“Or Willow.” Spike added.

Buffy didn’t want to think along that line. No matter what Willow was still her best friend. She hadn’t treated her as such lately, and she was sorry. If, no, when this was over things were going to be different.

Just then they could hear Xander. ”Oh god.” as he ran for the front door. Spike and Buffy headed in the direction he came from and found Warren in the bathroom. His hair was splayed out in all directions. His finger tips and feet were black from where the electricity had exited his body. He was balled up into a position that said he died in pure agony.

Buffy took in the scene and buried her face into Spike’s chest to block it out.

“Didn’t know Red had it in her.” Spike said, but his face was a little sad. ~She’s not supposed to have this in her.~

Buffy walked away from the room, resuming her search for her friend. She stopped and spun to face Spike. “Maybe he dropped a hairdryer in the tub. Maybe Willow didn’t even do this. Maybe..”

Spike stepped up and pulled her close. When she finally quieted he pulled her away to arms length. “Slayer, you have to face facts. You may have to take out Willow. You may not be able to reason with her. She has taken life now, it has a power, a sense of control, it does. She now has crossed the line from one side to the other. The side I am very familiar with.”

“I know.” Buffy hung her head. “I wish we had gotten her sooner.”

Clap.

Clap.

Clap.

“That was such a touching scene.” Willow stood in the doorway to the bedroom. Just then Dawn and Xander chose that moment to reenter the cabin. Xander’s face lit up as soon as he laid eyes upon the witch and he ran to embrace her. Her eyes flashed and before he could reach her, he was flying across the room and was slammed against the wall hard enough to render him unconscious.

“Willow! No!” Dawn took a step forward but stopped herself.

“Dawnie?!” Willow’s gaze fell upon Buffy. “You brought Dawn? How far up your ass is your head? This is dangerous! Buffy, I should have left you dead. Your bad necrophilia habits have made you careless. What were you thinking?”

“I never asked you to bring me back. I was happy. No pressure and I knew you guys were ok. But YOU couldn’t let me go. You brought me back for you.” Buffy was mad.

“I don’t know why I did. You might as well be dead as much as you’ve been home. To busy porking the walking dead. Your name should be ‘Slutty the Vampire Layer’ instead.

Buffy launched herself at Willow. Wil flung her against the wall next to Xander. Buffy sprung back to her feet and circled Willow. When Willow’s back was turned, Spike ran for her and was promptly slammed against the wall.

“I’m bored.” Willow whined. She raised her hands and vines began growing up from in between the floorboards and entangled themselves around Buffy. She struggled but could not fight free of them.

Spike stood up in full game face. They had to subdue her to do the spell. He had figure it out

Buffy, finally freeing herself from the vines tried to get to Willow again and was rewarded with a trip through the window. Dawn ran at Willow and got through her defenses. She pulled back and punched Willow hard in the face before she could recover from the surprise. Wil’s head rocked back, but she did not go down. Spike took the opportunity to hit her on the back of the head himself. She crumpled but he caught her and eased her to the floor.

“Niblet, I need you to check on your sis. The sun’s coming up and I can’t go out there.” Dawn nodded and headed for the door.

A few minutes later Dawn and Buffy walked in. Buffy’s face was covered in cuts and she was limping a little. Instantly she took charge. “Dawn run to the car and get that brush I brought.”

“I don’t think now’s the time to….”

“Just go!” She began searching for something to tie Willow up with. “Spike help me find some rope and a gag.”

They found some rope in the closet and there were some dishcloths in the kitchen. After they were done, Buffy ran to check on Xander who was still out. As she sat him up, she noticed the blood running down his back and matted in his hair.

“We need to do this and get him to the nearest hospital.” She stood and pulled three pictures of Willow out of her back pocket and fished the ribbon out of her front one. Dawn came in with the brush and Buffy pulled three red hairs out of it.

“You know, we coulda just got some from her while she’s knocked out.”

“Do you want to get close enough to see if you can fly?” Buffy replied to her sister. “I didn’t want take that chance.”

“Oh.”

Buffy smiled and rubbed Dawn on the back. “You remember what to say, right?”

“Yeah.”

All three held their pictures, with the strand of Willow’s hair and began wrapping them in the ribbon. In unison they all chanted.

By the power of 3 times 3, we bind you from harm.

Harm to yourself and harm to others.

Willow’s Eyes sprung open and she struggled against the bonds. She tried to wiggle her fingers to untie herself, but they had thought of that. She couldn’t say the words, because she was gagged. She was helpless. Except for that little nail file she always kept in her back pocket. She struggled to get it out, getting more desperate as they neared the ninth repeat. She felt claustrophobic, like she was suffocating. Then the feeling was gone, so was the anger. What she had just done came crashing down on her and she began to sob.

Epilogue

“Giles, calm down.” She could almost hear him cleaning his glasses over the phone. She smiled at the familiar image. “I tried to get a hold of you.”

“Buffy, you didn’t even leave a message.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think.”

“So how’s Xander?”

“He comes home tomorrow. We had to ride to the nearest payphone and call an ambulance. Then we had him moved to Sunnydale General so he could be close to home. They had to stitch him up and keep him for observation.”

“And Willow?”

“She’s kind of spacey. She says she felt the binding. Like a suffocating blanket surrounding her. Insulating her magic. I feel so helpless, so responsible. If we had gotten to Warren first, if we had saved Tara, if we had foiled his plan, any of those things would have kept Willow from turning.”

“You can’t blame yourself. Willow made her decision, now she must live with it. Your job now is to be support for her. Be her friend. Did the authorities question you on the body?”

“No, they chalked it up to an electrical accident”

“And you’re..you’re seeing Spike now, is that correct?”

“Yes.” ~Here it comes.~ She thought. She glanced into the living room and smiled at the vampire sprawled across her sofa.

“Is he there? Can I speak to him?”

“Wha..Why?” Not what she was expecting.

“It’s important.”

She held the phone to her chest and called Spike over. “He wants to talk to you.”

He took the receiver. “Rupert.”

“Spike, I hope you know what your doing. She’s not as strong as she appears and if you hurt her…”

“Not you too. I wish somebody would stake me, so I can stop hearing that stupid threat.”

“No, Spike I won’t stake you. I can think of a lot more interesting and painful things to do. Have I made myself clear?”

Spike swallowed. He looked at Buffy who was watching him from her spot at the table. He tried to put himself in Giles’ position and thought of Dawn on a date. On a date with someone like him. He squeezed the phone and heard the plastic crack a little under the pressure. “No worries there, Mate.”

Spike handed the phone back to Buffy and went to go check on Dawn who was in her room doing homework.

“He almost broke my phone, what did you say?”

“Be careful Buffy, what if the chip malfunctions.”

“I forgot. It’s gone. Spike went away and got the chip removed.”

“Oh dear.” Cleaning glasses again.

“Am I not the Slayer, Giles?”

“Of course you are.”

“And he’s vampire right?”

“Correct.”

“If he crosses the line, he’s dust boy, simple as that. I took out Angel as bad as it hurt. I did my job. I’ll do it again if need be. Feel better?”

“Quite.” He didn’t sound convinced.

“I miss you Giles.”

“I miss all of you, for some strange reason. I know, it’s too quiet here.” He chuckled.

Spike watched from the bottom of the stairs as Buffy wrapped up her call to her watcher. He would always be her watcher; no matter ho far away he went.

She hung up and walked over to Spike and wound her arms around Spike. “You think I can take a nap before the world falls apart again?”

“Sorry, Luv, but we need to finish the conversation about my trip to Africa.”

“Oh.” She let him lead her to the couch.

He took an unneeded breath and took her hand into both of his. “I killed two people, Buffy. I fed.”

She instinctively tried to pull her hand away but he held it tight.

“I need you to let me finish.” He told her of the first night and his red haired victim. Some of his thoughts, some of his decisions. He then went on to the next night and his second victim. “The chip made me stop and re-enter your world. I now see you and your mates in just about everyone. I cannot promise you I will never feed. But, I think, I will never feed off of the innocent. I am taking this one-day at a time. I’m over a hundred years old, Buffy and this is all new to me. Somehow for the first time I feel.” He paused, seeming to search for the right words. ”In control of who I am. Like, I am no longer defined by what I am, but who I am.”

“And who are you Spike?”

“I am William…who wrote god awful poetry, a wanker, but he’s in here,” he pointed to his chest. “And William the Bloody, fledgling to Drusilla, getting revenge on the world who laughed at him. And Spike, the vampire who’s in love with the vampire slayer..and sort of cares for her mates too.”

“And that means what?”

“Ok.” He got up and paced back and forth in front of her. “I’ve been thinking. What lets any woman allow a man into her life? Trust right? Trust he won’t beat her, rape her, or kill her. Right?”

She nodded.

“That’s what your afraid of, that I’ll wake up one day and decide to do those things to you and your chums. Correct?”

Again she nodded.

“ Do you trust me?” He cocked his head slightly and raised an eyebrow.

“I want to…I really do but…”

“But what? What makes you so bloody different from other women? Most women find a male that is stronger than they or at least equal. Still with me?”

“Yes.”

“You have done just that. Do you trust me?”

She stood and pulled him into a hug. “Please don’t let me be wrong in this, but yes, I trust you.”

He pulled her away a little and looked into her eyes. “Do you love me?”

“Don’t push your luck buddy.” She smiled and pulled him into a kiss.

The End