DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING, JOSS OWNS EVERYTHING, BLAH, BLAH... RATINGS: R/NC17

Story starts at the end of 'FIRST DATE'

'ONE NORMAL DAY'                                    

CHAPTER 1 - BAD DAY

"Because I'm not ready for you to not be here," she had told him.

He had asked, and she had told him, to the best of her ability; God only knows, she had told him.

Yet still, he pushed her, looking at her with those expectant puppy dog eyes, soon clouded over by doubt."And the Principal?" Spike had asked. "How's he fit in?" She could see the wheels turning in that strange brain of his.

What could she tell him? That Wood was possibly a man she could count on to help with the demon fighting, that he was attractive to her, sort of. But more likely, it was a case of keeping your enemies close; hers and Spike's. She'd had a very bad feeling rise in the pit of her stomach when he told her how his mother had been killed. Later, Wood had acted just a little too strange around Spike, stranger than just somebody who didn’t have vampires as friends.

Keep your friends close; your enemies, closer.

Isn't that what she'd always done. Spike should know that, intimately.

Only they weren't enemies anymore. Friends? Would she call him her friend if someone asked her? Was there a word in English that could be descriptive enough to cover all that they had been to each other; past, present; future?

"How's he fit in?" Didn't Spike know that Wood would never 'fit' in? Not like he did, nowhere even close to how he 'fit' into her life now. Piece of the puzzle - hers, his.

Unbelievable.

Unbeleiveably that he’s putting me under pressure to define all this to him, reassure him that he’s needed, that he ‘fits’ in, belongs.

Doesn't he already get that?

They sat in silence on the couch, each of them only taking sidelong glances at each other.

Spike had been stunned to hear what Buffy had said to him, "No, you have to stay, .... not why I need you here, ...because I'm not ready for you to not be here..."

He thought he’d handled himself quite well today. What with having learned that Buffy had a date and all that, "My eyes are clear," he’d told her. Believed it himself at the moment, too. Bugger.

"Why shouldn’t she have a normal date, like a girl? Fellow wants to take her to a nice restaurant," he’d reasoned with himself. "Never going to work anyway; ‘tween you and her, mate."

However, during the time she was out, he’d nearly climbed out of his own skin in anxiety, taken to glancing at the clock, furtively, every two minutes. Where the hell was a smoke, when you needed one?

He’d been all too happy to go and find her when ‘the boy’ found himself in a bad situation.

"Oh, this is possibly the best thing I’ve ever had in my mouth," she’d said to the principal. He looked sideways at Buffy, hoping he hadn’t just betrayed the bit of eye roll he’d just done at the memory of that statement! Best thing, indeed!

If she’d had her phone with her, she could have handled it herself. He’d only gotten mostly in the way; she really didn’t need him for his fighting skills these days. Then why? He looked at her again, questioningly.

Buffy saw him looking at her again. ENOUGH! She had to get out of there for a while.

She got up and started walked over to the weapon’s chest.

"Where’re you going? Spike asked her.

"Out. Do a little patrol," she answered, not looking at him.

"I’ll come along," Spike said.

"NO!" Buffy said rougher than she intended, "I mean, no. You should stay; you can be on guard here. Okay?" she said, looking at him.

"Sure, whatever you want, pet," Spike said, feeling a bit hurt.

Buffy hurried out into the night. At least she could handle a couple of rogue demons or vamps. Couldn’t handle the feelings that Spike was always bringing up in her. Not now, not with everything so uncertain. No time for that kind of thing.

Would there ever be a ‘time’ for that sort of thing? Whatever that was. One thing she was sure of - she’d not had any time for anything remotely normal in over 7 years.

And now, with The First, certainly no time for normal, now.

Time.

Time. Was. Running. Out.

Normal.

No. Time. To. Ever. Be.

Be.

Be. Normal.

Buffy walked along, pondering the very things that she’d left the house in order to forget about. As she did, two vampires watched her from behind Spike’s old crypt as she made her rounds of the cemetery.

Spike paced restlessly around the house. He’d wanted to go on patrol with Buffy. He’d known what she was doing - getting away from him. Moreso than just keeping a few demons in check. What with the First in town, most the demons were keeping a low profile.

"Bugger!" he said to himself, as he walked down the basement stairs. "Really should get out of this town!"

Knew he wouldn’t though, not if she wanted him here. Never. Even if it wound up killing him.

He lay down for a few minutes, closing his eyes. Less than ten minutes later he jolted upright.

"What, what is it?" Giles asked Spike sleepily, who’d shaken him awake.

"You’re on guard duty. Going to find Buffy; somethin’s wrong, " Spike said.

"She went out? Why didn’t you stop her? Go with her?" Giles said, getting up off the cot in the spare bedroom Xander had erected downstairs.

"You ever stop the slayer from doing just what she wanted to?" Spike asked, giving Giles a dirty look.

"Don’t suppose so," Giles answered.

"Right, then I’m gone," Spike said, hurrying up the stairs and out the back door before Giles had pulled on his pants.

Buffy hadn’t seen them coming. Hadn’t even sensed them until they both had jumped her from either side.

The bigger vampire, brandishing a baseball bat had hit Buffy square in the head with it, as the other knocked her off her feet. She was unconscious as she hit the ground.

"We got her! We got her!" the smaller vamp said with glee. "We’ve bagged the slayer!"

"Let’s get her in here," the larger vamp said, motioning over to Spike’s old crypt.

"Going to feed on her in there, then?" the smaller one asked, as he carried her over to the door of the crypt.

"All in good time, all in good time. Feed on her for a while, but don’t want to kill her. We’ll have plenty of bargaining power once everyone knows we’ve got the slayer. Might even be a nice bounty on her head," the larger vamp said, as he relished the thoughts.

Spike was running at full vampire speed as he approached the cemetery. He’d easily tracked her by scent, but even if he hadn’t had that extra sense, he would have known where she was heading. She always did. His cemetery; his crypt.

He slowed his run to a walk as he approached the crypt. He could hear the faint whispers of the vampires. And sense her faint heartbeat. Faint?

Enraged, he threw open the doors to his old crypt, "BUFFY!" he yelled out.

The larger vampire, whose back had been to Spike, turned around slowly. In his arms, was the limp body of the slayer. The vampire looked over at Spike with yellow eyes and bloody fangs.

"Let her go!" Spike yelled.

"Hey, don’t have to shout. There’s plenty slayer still left for anyone who wants some," he said to Spike, smirking.

Spike tried to think quickly. He smiled at the larger vamp, "Hey mate, I’ve been tracking that bitch of a slayer for years. How’d you fellows bag her?"

"Just did. That was the funny part, she practically walked up to us," he said, as he adjusted Buffy’s body from one arm to the other, while the other vamp looked on hungrily at her neck, "she just wasn’t paying attention. Simple as that!"

"So you fellows decided to bring her here to my crypt?" Spike asked.

"Your crypt? Hasn’t been anyone here in ages!" the smaller vamp said.

"Well, you’re right and wrong, mate. Fact is, I did move out for a while, but I just moved back in the other day," Spike said.

"That makes her my property," he continued, "and it’ll also make the third slayer I killed."

"You? You’re the one? You’re Spike?" the smaller vamp said, with admiration.

"The one and only," Spike said, taking a small bow.

"So what? Heard you killed your own kind now-a-days, anyway," the larger vamp said.

"Yeah, I killed a few of our kind. So what? All in the plan," Spike said.

"What plan is that?" the larger vamp asked.

"The plan to be able to get close enough to the slayer, have her trust me, then to kill her. Nearly bloody did until you blokes showed up here tonight and stole my thunder!" Spike said.

"Well, we did at that. Too bad, besides, got other uses for the slayer than just killing her. For now," the larger vamp said, leering down at Buffy’s form as he licked his lips.

"What might that be?" Spike said, sickened to even think where else they might be going with that line; what they would do to her if they ‘held’ her captive. He knew only too well.

"Money, fame, prestige, leverage," the larger vamp said.

"Money is it?" Spike said, relieved that was the first thing, "what if I could pay you thousands of dollars right now for the slayer, would you be interested? You could still take all the glory, too. I just want the bitch dead. But, by my hands; been waiting years for this and would like to have myself this one thing."

"What’s that?" the smaller vamp asked.

"One. Real. Good. Day!"

The vamps looked at each other.

"Okay, Spike. You can have her. Just show us the money."

Spike walked over to the corner of the crypt near the window and knelt down, discreetly adjusting something at his sides as he did. Taking a knife from his pocket, he scraped at the mortar from between some bricks. Soon he had dislodged the two bottom bricks. From behind them, he brought out a long, slender, tarnished lock box.

He stood up and walked over to the old table that had once held his TV. He set the box down and opened it.

The vampires stood with their eyes agape as they saw the bundled money and jewels from across the room.

"Reckon there’s about $50,000 here. I’d say that’s a pretty fair deal for one skinny little, half dead slayer, wouldn’t you? Spike asked.

The vamps nodded.

"Put her down," Spike motioned to the top of the sarcophagus, "don’t drop her either; don’t want her to die before I can kill her."

After doing so, the vamps walked over to where the money was as Spike circled over towards Buffy. Checking to see that she was still breathing, he walked back over towards them, as they were greedily counting the money.

Spike took two stakes from either side of his pants and dispatched the shocked vampires before they knew what hit them.

"Too easy." Spike said, "should’ve been for you too, Buffy. What happened?"

He hurriedly shoved the money and jewels back in the lock box and stuck the whole thing into his inner jacket pocket. No time to re-mortar his favorite hiding place; he’d have to find another one or come back and fix this one sometime.

Buffy was just coming to as Spike picked her up in his arms.

"Huh? Sp…what hap..?" she said, her head pounding.

"Don’t worry, pet. I’ve got you. Spike’s got you."

"How?" Buffy said, trying to come conscious, but giving herself up to being carried home in Spike’s strong arms.

How indeed? How’d a couple of amateurs like those back there get the best of his slayer?

"Just had a bad day," he answered her.

CHAPTER 2 - GOT ICE?

"What happened?" Giles said, as he opened the door as Spike carried Buffy inside.

"Got hurt. Couple of vamps jumped her down by my old crypt," Spike answered.

Giles started to ask how, but seeing the look on Spike's face, decided to wait. He followed Spike up the stairs and opened Buffy's bedroom door for him.

Spike laid Buffy gently on the bed, "Be right back, luv," he said, as Giles came over towards her.

"Buffy?" Giles said.

"Giles," Buffy answered weakly, "sorry, didn't mean to..." she grimaced in pain.

"It's alright, don't talk now," he said, giving her hand a squeeze.

Spike came back into the room with a bowl of warm water, washcloths, towels, and the first aid kit.

"Spike," Buffy said, through half shut eyes.

"It's alright, pet, Spike's here," he said, as he started to gently wash the cuts on her face.

"Rupert, can you bring some ice? Buffy's got a nasty bump on the back of her head," Spike asked, "needs to get into her jammies, too. That way I can see if she's hurt anywhere else," Spike said, without embarrassment.

"I should get Willow, then," Giles hurriedly said, repulsed at the idea of Spike being so familiar with Buffy as to undress her, even if they had been physical before, even if it was in the interest of dressing her wounds.

"No, let Red sleep, I'll take care of it; of Buffy," Spike said, as he applied a small bandage to her forehead.

Giles had been just watching the exchange between the two of them. They really did have a connection that seemed to defy any reasoning he could come up with; that he wanted to come up with. The idea of his Buffy and Spike...he just couldn't fathom it; didn't want to.

"I.C.E.?" Spike repeated, staring at him, pointedly.

"Oh, yes. Be right back," Giles said, leaving the room, fuming at being reduced to Spike’s errand boy.

Spike got up and locked the door quietly.

"Let's see now about getting you out of these things," Spike said, as he gently pulled her to him, so he could remove her top.

Underneath her, he saw a small patch of red. He looked on her back and saw a big ugly scrape that was oozing blood.

"Let's turn you over, luv. Dr. Spike's going to see that you're all taken care of," he said, as he gently rolled Buffy onto her stomach.

The scrape wasn't too deep and Spike was able to clean it and bandage her within a few minutes.

"Hmmmm, if I was Buffy's jammies, where would I be?" he asked himself. From years ago, he already knew what drawer her underwear was in, but not her pajamas.

He found a white flannel nightgown with little pink roses on them.

"Come on luv, let's get this on you," Spike said, as he gently pulled Buffy up towards him.

Buffy felt Spike lift her off the bed with his strong, sure hands. She wanted to help, but she felt like jelly on the inside and couldn't quite get a grip on what was happening, her head was dizzy and the room was spinning. The only thing she knew was that for now, she was safe, Spike had her and she was safe.

Spike finished pulling the nightgown over her head and laid her back on the bed. He then undid her pants, pulled them down to remove them and to inspect her legs and hips. They were unharmed, except for a small scrape on her left knee.

He sighed, then got up and unlocked the door just as Giles came back with the ice.

Giles brushed off Spike's out-stretched hand as he went over to Buffy with the icebag.

"Spike?" Buffy said, when he laid it on her head.

"No, Giles," he replied.

"Spike," Buffy said softly.

"She wants you, apparently," Giles said, a bit of hurt in his voice.

Spike thought of relishing the moment, knowing how much Giles disliked him, but thought better of it. He knew he'd always had Buffy's best interest at the heart of the matter. He just shrugged with a small smile.

"I've got you, pet," Spike said, as he gently lifted her head, so as to put the icebag on the right spot.

Spike said something to her that Giles couldn't hear.

"Thank you, Giles," Buffy whispered from her bed.

"You're welcome," he said, closing the bedroom door behind him.

Now Spike has to tell Buffy to thank me? "This really is no good," he thought as he walked down the hall.

CHAPTER 3 - LESSONS FROM THE PAST

After Giles had left, Spike had given Buffy some aspirin and made her go to sleep with the promise that he'd stay with her. Not that she needed much convincing to go to sleep; she was hurt and exhausted, more than he'd ever seen her be.

As the morning light approached, and with it, his own tiredness, Spike put an extra blanket over the window, in order to keep out the light.

Spike watched Buffy as she slept, soothing her with his voice when she started having nightmares until she settled back into sleep.

He watched her sleep, as his mind tried to formulate a plan; something he could do for her, to ease her burden.

He remembered the lock box, still in his pocket, wishing money could make it all better, could buy happiness; at least for her. "I know, I'll bribe The First to leave us alone," he thought sarcastically to himself. "Yeah, right you wanker."

He watched her sleep, realizing that he'd saved her tonight. Was that a first for him? He'd helped her before. Lots. But mostly, and particulary as of late, it had been her saving him - again and again. It scared him to know that he'd saved her, because really, it wasn't that he'd been strong, only that she'd had a moment of weakness, and for her, that could be deadly.

He remembered when she’d come to him only a couple of years before, looking for answers about how he had killed the two slayers. Wanting to know what they had done wrong; wanting to know how she could learn from their mistakes.

He wished he hadn’t said what he had to her; imprinting on her brain forever, the truth of a slayer’s short existence.

"Lesson the second: ask the right questions. You want to know how I beat 'em? The question isn't ‘How'd I win?’ The question is ‘Why'd they lose’?."

"And part of you wants it... not only to stop the fear and uncertainty, but because you're just a little bit in love with it. Even you."

"Death is on your heels, baby, and sooner or later it's gonna catch you. Sooner or later, you're gonna want it. And the second- the second- that happens...You know I'll be there. I'll slip in... have myself a real good day."

He wished he knew what it was she wanted from him, what she needed from him.

CHAPTER 4 - BIG FARYL DEMONS

He sensed her before he felt her small hand lightly touch his fingers. He thought he'd just closed his eyes only for a few minutes while she slept, but had drifted off himself.

He opened his eyes as she took her hand away.

"Hey," she said softly.

"Hey yourself. How you feeling?" Spike asked.

"Confused. Head-achy...what happened?"

"Couple of nasties jumped you down by my old place. Knocked you out," Spike said.

"I don't remember," Buffy said.

"Probably due to that nasty bump on your head," Spike said.

Buffy raised her hand to her head, "Ouch! Must be the spot."

"How did I get home?" She asked, knowing the probable answer.

"I came out to find you. Something didn't feel right, so I went looking," Spike said, shrugging.

"What was it? That got me?" Buffy said.

"Big demons, two big Fyarl demons. Couldn't have fought them off by yourself," Spike said, trying to reassure her.

Buffy looked at him, no worse for the wear. Big Fyarl demons, huh? Something didn't add up, but she didn't press him.

"Thank you," she said.

"For what, luv?" Spike asked.

"Coming out, bringing me home, taking care of me," Buffy said, looking him in the eyes with gratitude.

"Buffy," he didn't know why, all of a sudden he had a lump in his throat. "I, I'm just glad to return the favor, luv," he said, wishing his head would explode in pain, like it used to. Something concrete to concentrate on, instead of this feeling that he was missing some sort of signal she was sending.

"Spike, I..." Buffy started just as the door opened.

"Hey Buffy," Willow said.

"Feeling better this morning?" Giles asked.

"Hey Willow. Yes, better," Buffy answered both of them.

"Spike, why don't you go downstairs and refill Buffy's icebag? Then you'll probably want to rest, since the sun has been up for hours now and the potentials are on their way out for some training with Xander at the gym. He rented the place for the whole day, just for them." Giles said.

Spike got the distinct feeling that both Giles and Willow had orchestrated this 'takeover' of Buffy's care.

Buffy quickly glanced at Spike with something like alarm in her eyes, but quickly veiled it before they could see. She nodded slightly to him.

"Okay, then," Spike said as he gently lifted the water-logged icebag from the back of Buffy's head, caressing it for just a second, just so that she knew that he had.

When he came back with the ice, Willow met him at the door.

"Thanks, Spike, I'll give it to Buffy," she said.

Spike looked at her for a couple of seconds, then shrugged and started to hand her the icebag.

Just as she took it, he held her wrist lightly for a moment, motioning her out to the hall.

"Don't let Giles upset Buffy by telling her every little detail about training and all that. She isn't herself right now. Wasn't herself last night," Spike said.

"What do you mean?" Willow asked.

"Buffy almost got killed by two junior vamps. Couldn't be much more than fledglings, yet she didn't even see them coming. Not before one of them cracked her on the head," Spike said.

"That's terrible, but maybe they were really strong?" Willow asked, hopefully.

"No, just average. Which is why I think Buffy's in serious shape and needs a break from the stress. I even told her they were big Faryl demons that attacked her. She doesn't remember and I didn't want to make her feel worse than she already does about getting bested last night," Spike said.

"You're right Spike, she's been wound up tighter than a, than a, well, something. What with all the Potentials, and The First, and when you were killing people, then captured, then your chip going all wonky, and...oh, sorry, Spike," Willow said, seeing the pain in his eyes.

"Yeah, I know, Wil, I'm a big part of her problem. Or at least I was. I intend to do everything I can to earn my keep around here. Helping Buffy, you guys, fighting evil," Spike said.

"You know, I'd leave in a minute if that's what she wanted. Even asked her; suggested it, that I should leave town, get away, before... you know, The First tries to make me its bitch again. But she said no. She said I had to stay. Telling you this just in case Giles wants to know why I am sticking around. Because Buffy ordered me to," Spike said, stretching the truth a bit, but for a good purpose.

"So tell Rupert that he can stop with the dirty looks and all that rot," Spike said, walking away. "And you too, Red. You and the boy."

"Spike!" Willow called after him, "I don't give you dirty looks!"

"No, just disparaging ones," Spike called back, over his shoulder, as he slunk off to the basement.

CHAPTER 5 - COMFORT

On his way down to the basement, Spike looked around, and not seeing anybody in the kitchen, he put the object he'd been looking for in his pocket and continued downstairs.

Spike took a good look around the basement, making sure nobody else was there. He then took the object out of his pocket, "Bloody stupid things," he said as he flipped open the cell phone and dialed the number. "Clem? Spike here...yeah, I'm alright, hey listen, there's something I want you to do for me..."

It would be at least 6 or 7 hours before he could do what he was planning; if she wanted to; if she trusted him.

"Do you trust me?" he’d asked her last year, showing her handcuffs for their fun and games. "Never," she’d replied. Hadn’t been just about that. Been about everything.

Trust.

He sighed, restless. Nothing for him to do except rest until then, he thought as he closed his eyes.

Upstairs, Buffy was barely listening as Giles went on about the situation with the girls. On and on and on. She felt like she was drowning in it all. She was dizzy and she was starting to remember some things from last night. One thing she knew for certain: it hadn't been Faryl demons that had attacked her, more likely just a couple of vampires. She remembered walking near Spike's old crypt, then nothing else until she was being carried home by Spike. She realized that she had been extremely careless and had nearly paid the ultimate price. Again.

She was off her game; that was for sure. Spike was off his game, too. At least, not so much last night. How were they going to fight The First like this?

She knew she should care, that she should be training, but all she wanted right now was to go to Spike, talk to him, sit next to him. Didn't want to think about The First, didn’t want to think of winning, losing, failing, didn’t want fancy restaurant dates with someone new. Just wanted to be. Wanted to sit beside him, just be.

".....think we should start that this weekend," Giles said.

"Buffy? Did you hear what I just said? I think we should train the girls to use swords this weekend," Giles said, again.

"Huh? Sure, whatever you think is best, Giles," Buffy said, just to shut him up.

"Buffy, I understand that you were hurt last night and that Spike found you. How do you know that he didn't set it up? So that he could come to your rescue, so you'd see him as a hero?" Giles asked.

"Giles!" Buffy said, exasperated. "You really don't know Spike at all anymore, or you would never even ask me that."

"He's the one that saved me, didn't even know I was going out until I decided to, spur of the moment. And don't even suggest that once I was out, he found some vamp buddies to attack me, or that he did it himself. You are so wrong about this; about him, I can't even begin to explain it to you." Buffy said, wishing she didn't have to keep defending him.

Giles just looked at her and shook his head.

"I have to go and meet Xander at the gym. He's got to go to work and I'm going to take over training until about 6:00PM. I hate to leave you, but Willow is here," Giles said, glad to have some other topic of conversation.

"That's fine Giles," Buffy said, happy to hear he wouldn't be hanging around her all day. "Willow can take care of me, of everything," she said, with a smile.

"Good, fine. I'll be off then," Giles said, getting up to leave.

"Just one more thing, Buffy. Don't trust him too much. Spike," Giles said, as he closed the door behind him.

Trust.

One little word, one world of meaning.

Spike.

As soon as she heard Giles leave, she called to Willow.

"Hey, Buffy. What can I do for you?" Willow asked, coming into the bedroom.

"Willow, my head is still sort of wonky, but I need to, want to go see Spike. Can you walk me down the stairs? Please?" she asked, eyes pleading.

"Sure, Buffy. No problem," Willow said, starting to help Buffy up out of bed.

He was only half-asleep, dreaming about it. He hadn’t seen it in almost 10 years, until last summer after he’d left Sunnydale. On his way to Africa, then again, before he returned.

He was now wide-awake as he sensed somebody coming down the stairs. Two people, one unsteady. He opened his eyes as Willow with her arm around Buffy, walked up to his cot.

"Buffy wanted me to bring her down to talk to you," Willow said, then smiled as she turned to leave. She handed the fresh icebag.

"See, Spike? No disparaging looks."

"Appreciate that, Red," Spike said, "I’ll try not to snark at ya in return."

Laughing, she went upstairs and closed the door.

"Are you feeling better, Buffy?" he asked.

"Bit wobbly," she replied.

She looked down at him, watching her. Waiting for a word, from her. Always waiting for her word. Except, now, she didn’t have any. She looked at him lying there and she was at a loss; loss of words, loss of direction; loss of everything.

He looked at her just staring at him, as if she was working something out in her mind. He knew he should get up so she could sit down, but he was frozen; watching her face as she looked at him.

He wasn’t good at silences, "Buffy?"

"Spi…Spike," his name caught in her throat.

He understood now. She was lost and looking for a safe harbor; afraid to be lost, afraid to be found.

He opened up his arms to her and with a small shuddering inhale, she climbed into bed with him, burying her head in his neck, her arm over his chest, around his neck, holding onto him tightly, like he was a life raft. His arms enfolded her gently at first, as if she was a little broken bird; his little broken bird, then stronger as she clung onto him, looking for the security of his arms.

He rubbed her back, murmuring soothingly to her, until she finally relaxed, exhaled as if she’d been holding her breath forever, relaxed her hold just a little. He felt her heartbeat slow, as she finally drifted off to sleep, to a rest that she’d been denied for too long. There was a lump in his throat as he held her in his arms for this first time since?

Ever.

She’d never let herself be held by him. Never. Never held him. Not for comfort, nor out of any sort of feelings between them. Never. Only held onto him while fucking, to forget the pain, forget the loss. Maybe this was the same, holding for comfort, only minus the fucking.

But it felt different. More real. Wanted him to stay, needed him.

Maybe more.

He looked at the clock over the wash machine. Only another couple of hours. Then he’d ask her; when she awoke.

Ask her to trust him.

But for now, he would hold her in her sleep, as long as she needed, help her be at rest.

CHAPTER 6 - PLANNING AHEAD

Buffy woke up slowly, between wakefulness and the edge of sleep. She felt like she'd had some sort of pleasant dream, although she couldn't quite remember it. At least it hadn't been the heart pounding nightmares, which jerked her, awake every couple of hours; ones that she'd had every night for almost five months.

Slowly she became aware that she was nestled between a pillow and...Spike's neck. She felt her arms around his neck and felt both a sense of relief and also embarrassment. Embarrassment that she always sought him out for comfort of one kind or another. He deserved more. Much more.

She kept seeking him out, time and time again. Why? She knew the answer, at least the part she was willing to admit to; it seemed like the only person who had the slightest idea of what she was going through was Spike. How long had it been this way? She couldn’t even remember when it had become clear to her; that he and he alone understood her, knew her, cared for her, and of course, still loved her; all of her. Didn’t he?

She became aware that one of his arms was around her back, while the other was? She reached up and felt his hand holding the icebag on her head.

Slowly she lifted her head up from his shoulder, moving her arm out from behind his neck as she did so, and looked at him.

"Have you been holding that icebag on my head the whole time?" she asked, glad to have the icebag as icebreaker.

"Yeah, you had quite a bump, thought it be best," he answered.

She reached under the icebag, "Seems a lot smaller now. Thank you," she said, smiling a little at him.

"Didn’t mind," Spike said, smiling back.

"You feeling better now, Buffy?"

"Seem to be. I'm not dizzy anymore or wonky, so that's an improvement."

"Buffy?"

"What?"

"Do you trust me?" Spike asked, looking serious all of a sudden.

"Well, considering that I'm lying here on your bed, after all we've been through, I think you can take that as a yes," she answered, trying to fathom what he wanted from her.

"Good. Then I want you to do something. For me. For you, too. Mostly for you," Spike said.

Buffy had no idea where this was leading, "What?"

"I want you to go away with me. Overnight," Spike said, then hurried on, "It's not far, it's a place, it's...it's a place I own, up in the mountains. About 2 hours from here."

"Own?" Buffy asked, raising her eyebrows in stunned disbelief.

"Yes. Own. For about 50 years. Nobody knows about it except for Clem."

"Clem?" Buffy asked, absentmindedly, still not believing what she was hearing.

"Buffy!"

"How can I? The girls, The First..." Buffy stammered.

Spike sat up, pulling her with him.

"How are you going to fight right now, Buffy? You're exhausted, you're hurt. Last night you let two amateur vampires almost kill you. If I hadn't come out..." Spike said, shaking his head at the memory.

"I knew it wasn't Faryl demons," Buffy said with a wry smile. "Still, it was just an off night; I, I...was thinking about something," she added lamely.

"You know I'm right," Spike insisted, "you may feel better, but you still aren't in any shape to fight any nasties right now, small or large."

"I know," she said quietly. "Still, Giles. Willow. Giles! Even if I wanted to go or thought that I should, Giles would have a holy cow!" Buffy said.

"Oh, I see," Spike said, turning away.

"Spike, don't be like that, I...I just can't."

"No, you mean you won't," Spike said, turning back towards her, "I don't care if Giles doesn't like me or even hates me. I care more that you still think you can't do something for yourself; not if it will displease him. Even if he's wrong. Even if I'm right."

"It's not that, I..."

"It's not? Then what is it?"

"What about The First? What if I'm gone and he comes or sends the Harbingers? What if he knows I'm gone?" she asked, her voice quietly pleading with him to understand.

"We'll bring a cell phone," Spike said, then added, "bloody stupid things, but still, you'd be able to keep in touch."

"It's two hours away, though. What if they couldn't call in time?" Buffy asked.

"WILLOW!" Spike yelled.

"Spike!"

"What is it?" Willow asked, hurrying down the stairs.

"Want to ask you something. Say Buffy was to go away for a day, for overnight," Spike started out, "do you think that it would be safe for her to do so?"

"You going away, Buffy?" Willow asked, turning towards Buffy.

Buffy just shrugged her shoulders.

"Willow, Buffy's worried about what would happen if she was needed. I already mentioned the cell phone to her," Spike said, "anything else you can think of that might ease her mind?"

"Where you going?" Willow asked Buffy.

Buffy shrugged again, looking at Spike.

"Can't tell you exactly, a few hours away."

"You're going, too?" Willow asked, eyes getting large.

"Well, yeah, that was the plan." Spike said, snarking a bit at her.

"Hey! No snark, Spike," Willow said, "I just asked, didn't mean..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Could see it in your expression. Big Bad taking Buffy away," Spike said with some bitterness.

"No, it's just," Willow said, "well, surprising is all. Actually, I think it's, well, romantic."

"For Christ's sakes! Not talking romance here, witch! Talking Buffy needing a break from all this! You want a strong slayer or a slayer that's falling apart? When's the last time Buffy's been out of Sunnydale?" Spike asked.

Buffy and Willow just looked at each other.

"Buffy went to L.A. for the summer before senior year, in 1998," Willow offered.

"That doesn't count. I was working," Buffy said, then added, "I haven't been out of Sunnydale overnight since then, really not since I came here."

"Fuck Slayer! That's a bloody long time to have your nose to the grindstone," Spike said, then looking at her, he added softly, "and it's killing you."

"Well, you kept me pretty busy when you first got here, Spike," Buffy said.

"Yeah, imagine I did, but that was then and this is now," Spike answered.

"Did you kiss your mother with that mouth, Spike?" Willow asked.

"Yeah, but my mouth was a lot more pristine 120 years ago," he answered.

"Back to the problem. Is there anything you could do to help Buffy feel she can leave Sunnyhell for an overnight?" Spike asked.

"Are you going somewhere that is wired?" Willow asked.

"Wired?"

"Yeah, you know, wired for electricity? Computers?" Willow answered.

"Well, sort of," he replied.

Buffy looked at him questioningly.

"No, not computers."

"No phone-line?" Willow asked.

"No."

"How about satellite dish?"

"No."

"Wait, I got it!" Willow said. "Remember the spycams that Warren had all over the place to watch you last year?"

Buffy and Spike just looked at each other, then at Willow nodding.

"Oh, sorry. But I was thinking that we could get those here and maybe you could take Andrew's laptop, and his batteries, then you could watch the house!"

"That's an idea! No wait, won't work, even if we have the batteries, still can't get on the internet," Spike said.

"Wait! It will work on Buffy's cell phone. She's got wireless access to the net. You can just plug the laptop into her cell phone," Willow said, excited.

Spike reached into his back pocket.

"This cell phone?" he asked innocently.

"Spike!" Willow and Buffy said together.

"What? Had to call Clem earlier. It wasn't like I wasn't going to give it back."

"Okay then, cell phone: check, remote viewing: check. What else Slayer?"

"I still couldn't get back here in time if something started," Buffy said.

"Well, I could give you a spell that would transport you back in a few seconds. Only I'm not positive you could work it, not being a witch and all, but it might..." Willow said. "Besides Buffy, usually when The First does something, he usually lays low for a few days or a week. At least that's been his modus operandi, since we've been aware of him." Willow said.

"And Buffy, Spike is right; you need a break. You deserve a break; at least for a day or two. You haven't ever had one and you are exhausted," Willow said.

"Well?" Spike asked.

"Oh, and don't worry about Giles," Willow said, "I'll handle him."

Spike looked at Buffy, hopefully, expectantly.

He looks just like a little boy, sometimes, she thought. Giving him a little smile, "Okay. Let's go!" she said her smile increasing in size.

CHAPTER 7 -OUTTA HERE

Willow went upstairs and Buffy got up off the cot to follow her.

Looking back at Spike, she asked, "What should I pack? Anything special?"

Spike looked at her with a raised eyebrow for half a second, then deciding against making a remark that might have her changing her mind, just said, "Bring a coat and some warm socks."

"Okay, be right back," she said starting up the stairs, then stopped. "Hey, how are we getting there?"

"Car," Spike said, "My old DeSoto."

"Where's that at?" Buffy asked.

"Well, if Clem did as I asked him to, then it's about one block from here," Spike answered.

Buffy stared at him.

"How did you know I'd go?" she asked.

"I didn't pet, just wanted to be prepared in case you did, okay? Go pack now, so we can get out of here before anyone else comes home and we have to explain or I get staked!" Spike said.

"Okay, going to pack now," Buffy said, heading upstairs for real this time.

Once upstairs, Buffy went about putting some stuff into a small suitcase. Sweaters, check. Jeans, check. Toiletries and makeup, check. Shoes, check. Undies, check. Nightgown, hmmm, shorty or longy, flannel or skimpy? Buffy paused, well, he did say it wasn't about romance, she thought, not without some sadness and regret. Moments from the past year flitted through her brain, but she pushed them aside. Doesn't really matter then, does it? Okay, variety of nightgowns just because…I don't know what I'll want to wear; er, what the temperature will be, check.

Buffy met Spike in the kitchen with suitcase in hand. Spike only had a small duffel bag and was carrying his blanket.

"Well, we're off, I guess," she said to Willow. "I'll call you when we get there."

"Have a good time you guys!" Willow said walking them to the door.

It was 4:00PM, the sun was low in the sky, but Spike still needed to protect himself, so he put the blanket over his head, after taking Buffy's suitcase from her.

"We're off," he said, "thanks Wil, for looking after things."

"No problem, Spike," she replied, as they walked down the sidewalk, "Oh, and by the way, I still think it's ROMANTIC," she said, laughing as she closed the back door.

A block later they came to the only car on Revello drive with the windows almost completely blacked out. The DeSoto. They got in.

Buffy turned to Spike, "Where have you been keeping this? I didn't even think you still had it," she said.

"Storing it with some friendly sorts. Friends of Clem," Spike answered.

"You always have had this whole secret life in this other world, that I can only begin to guess at, haven't you?" Buffy asked.

"Well, pet, yeah. I mean, most of my type are just in this other world, as you put it. Most of my type don't spend so much time with your type, unless it's to eat them," Spike said, then rolled his eyes.

Buffy giggled, "Nevermind! Just drive!" she said, then in an almost desperate whisper, "take me out of Sunnydale, please, Spike."

"The lady’s wish is my command!" he replied, as he put the car into first gear and they pulled out into the road.

They drove in amiable silence for about half an hour until Spike turned the DeSoto onto I 15, South.

"Where exactly are we going," Buffy asked.

"Up near Cleveland National Forest, right on the outskirts of it, really. Up around 5,000 feet, highest point in San Diego County. Get off near Santa Ysabel, then, well, it's between there and a little berg called Julian," Spike answered.

"Oh," Buffy replied, simply.

They drove along for another hour in comfortable silence until Spike turned onto Hwy. 79, South.

"Think I heard of Julian. Do they grow apples there?" Buffy asked, "or is that somewhere else? Isn't Julian an old goldrush town?"

"Slayer! Good to know that the California educational system is working! Yeah, apples galore. Best apple growing in all of California! The really cool nights this time of year help them grow. Even snows sometimes. As good as any Washington or Michigan apples." Spike said.

"Julian was also one of the first goldrush towns in California; late 1860's. People think that the goldrush took place mostly in Northern California, but that happened later. Julian was just about first. After the prospectors came and left, Julian was mostly a ghost town. Then around 1930's or so, some investors saw an opportunity to make a little money on it's former image; started making it into a little get-a-way for Southern Californians wanting to soak in some history and get away from the everyday hubbub. So now it has lots of little B&B's with cute little names, like Prospector's Inn, Miner's Gold, etc. Also, has lots of cute little restaurants, antique shops, you know, your little tourist town. I don't say typical, because, really, it has kept a lot of it's charm and it usually isn't overrun with too many tourists, so it's - well, it's nice."

"Okay, Mr. Factoid," Buffy said laughing.

Spike always knew lots of trivia about lots of things. Guess when you're as old as Spike...she didn't know why, but all of a sudden that thought made her sad. The thought of Spike eternally looking so young, so fit, so...so beautiful! She gave him a sidelong glance. Yep, no mistaken, he definitely was beautiful. Beautiful, dangerous, old, loyal; all those things rolled into one soulful vampire that was taking her away on the only 'vacation' she could think of ever having had. In all those years, she wondered, had Spike ever been happy? Loved? She knew the answer and she swallowed a lump in her throat.

Clearing the lump from her throat, she asked him, "When will we be there?"

"About an hour," he answered.

"Okay," Buffy said, clearing her ears, as she felt the pressure from the increasing elevation. She lay her head back and closed her eyes.

Spike looked sideways at Buffy. She was so young, yet the things she'd had to do, had to learn about in so short of time, had made her much older than her counterparts. Buffy...he didn't know why, but all of a sudden that thought made him sad. The thought of Buffy having to always be on guard, be at the ready...and now...be at war. He looked at her again. She was so beautiful, but looked so tired. Besides, when she was a little girl, he wondered, had she ever been happy? Since her mother died, had she ever felt loved? He knew the answer and he swallowed a lump in his throat. He knew the truth, even though he had loved her, she hadn't allowed herself to feel it; not from him, as he had been, what he was.

He angrily pushed those thoughts away; angry at himself and concentrated on the road, vowing that he would give her the best, relaxing time he could, with none of his bullshit. This weekend, or overnight was for her and her alone.

"She what?" Giles yelled at Willow, "you let her go, with, with, SPIKE? Are you quite mad?" he went on.

"Listen, Giles, Buffy is going to be fine. I already told you that she'll be checking in regularly and I'm sure she'll be safe with Spike," Willow answered.

"Okay with Spike? You have gone mad; you and Buffy, both? You've both forgotten about what he is, what he's done," Giles said, still yelling.

"No, we haven't. In fact, if I remember correctly, seems that I had an episode of being evil myself, albeit, a much shorter one. Still, don't remember Spike ever wanting to destroy the world, as a matter of fact, he saved it when he went against Angel with Buffy a few years back," she said, losing patience.

"I don't trust Spike. I never will. He always just wants what he wants. I know, he's gone and gotten a soul, so now he's what? A wonderful person? He just did it to make Buffy forgive him, to try to win her over, and from what I've seen, it seems to be working!" Giles said, his face red with anger.

Willow looked at him for maybe the first time and saw a frustrated, older man, who after dedicating himself to the cause was at the end of his rope and not seeing anything clearly, anymore.

"So what? So what if he did do it for Buffy? I think he did it for himself, as well. But if he did do it for Buffy, what does that say about him? He's a vampire, Giles! What other vampire has ever, ever done this? Angel didn't. He was cursed and when he lost his soul again, he sure didn't want it back. When he's soulless and evil, he's all too happy to be that way. Know what else?" Willow said, on a roll now, "if Angel had a chip shoved up his brain, I think he would've found a way, or found someone else to kill Buffy. Spike could have. Spike didn't! So what if he's crazy in love and would do anything for her? Even back off and not pursue her? Which, by the way, is what he's been doing in my opinion. Again, I say so what? I, I think it's..." Willow didn't finish.

"Think it's what? Ok? Romantic? You girls and your foolish notions!" Giles said.

"Didn't think it was so foolish when it was Jenny, did you Giles?" Willow asked, knowing she was hitting a sore spot.

"Don't you ever compare Jenny to that, that thing!" Giles spat out.

"I don't think Spike is a thing, and Jenny wasn't so lily pure, herself!" Willow said.

"I'm warning you, Willow, you will not speak of Jenny that way!" Giles yelled.

"You're warning me? Warning me? When did you become my father? Or Buffy's for that matter?" Willow asked. "I think that’s the problem Giles; you still look at Buffy and me as your children. Well, look around you, Giles! We're not children anymore. Buffy, surely isn't. It's not that we don't need you anymore, but just not in the way we once did. Not even Buffy. You keep talking to her and about her like she's a child! She's not! She's a young woman and she has the right to make her own choices, even if it means going away for an overnight with Spike. It's her choice, Giles. Don't you see? Unless she really felt that it wasn’t absolutely in the best interest of everyone, she wouldn't have gone."

"Then why didn’t' she wait until I got back to leave?" Giles asked.

"Duh! She knew you'd give her a hard time or try to talk her out of it. She didn’t' want to fight. She's tired Giles; she's also so exhausted she nearly got herself killed last night by a couple of junior vamps. She went away because she hasn't been away for a day of not fighting, for over 5 years! Not one, stinking day, Giles. Can you understand that? Can you?" Willow asked.
 

Giles just shook his head, "No Willow, I'm afraid I can't, not when The First may attack anytime. I'm sorry, I think she's wrong and so are you," he said, turning to walk away.

"Well, I guess you're just going to have to live with those feelings then," Willow replied, as he walked away.

"Let's just hope we do live," he answered.

CHAPTER 8 – VALENTINE’S DAY - DINNER

Buffy had fallen asleep for the next 45 minutes. Finally she stirred, as Spike reached across her, pulling the dark black sun-blocking plastic off of the window. Buffy opened her eyes to a forest on either side of the highway.

"Wow!" she said, "when did this happen?"

"Oh, about 20 minutes ago," Spike answered, pulling the plastic off of the front and driver’s windows.

"Wish you'd woke me," Buffy said, wistfully.

"Needed your sleep. Still plenty to see, lots of trees," Spike said, looking at the sign that let him know they were almost to the exit.

"We'll be getting off at Santa Ysabel in about 5 minutes."

"Okay," Buffy answered, then reached across the seat, putting her hand on top of his, "thank you for this."

"No need, pet," Spike said, "know you needed a break, weren’t' your own super slayer self..."

"Shut up, Spike," Buffy said, softly, squeezing his hand a little.

They came to the exit for Santa Ysabel and turned left, heading towards Julian.

"Where do you, where is your...house, place?" Buffy asked, realizing how strange, how unbelievable it sounded coming off of her tongue.

"A couple miles before downtown Julian," Spike answered. "You hungry, Slayer?"

"Yeah, I am, I really am. I don't think I've eaten since..." she trailed off, embarrassed.

"Oh," Spike said, remembering the goddamned principal feeding her 'pears soaked in brandy, with sauce.' Well, la-de-da, he fumed, 'best thing she ever had in her mouth,' hmmmpf, he fumed.

"I'm sorry," Buffy said, again, touching his hand.

He shook off her hand, "No need, pet. No big deal," Spike said, vowing to keep his emotions in check.

Spike didn't fool her; he'd hurried upstairs as soon as he'd heard she had a date, to what? To run into her and tell her it was ok, that he didn't dream of a 'crypt for two with a white picket fence,' she smiled at the vision. Stupid date. Stupid Buffy.

"Hey, how about that food?" Buffy asked, changing the subject. Well, sort of.

"We’ll go into Julian, there's a little restaurant right when we get to town, nice digs; food and antiques, combined; unique!"

"Antique food?"

"Noooo, new food, with...oh, you'll see, pet," Spike said. He wondered how many times the girl had actually been out to nice restaurants. Not as many as she should have, at her age, he guessed. Only place she wound up at was the Bronze. Though, they did have Bloomin' Onions, he mused.

About 10 minutes later Spike pulled the car up to a two story white house on a corner. The old fashioned looking sign said The Rittenhouse, Restaurant & Antiques, Est. 1932.

"Lot of cars," Buffy remarked.

"Popular place," Spike said, turning off the window and going around to open the door for Buffy.

"How do I look?" Buffy asked, "mess, huh?"

"You look fine, luv, always do," Spike said, giving her his hand as he helped her out of the car.

"Only you would think so, Spike," she said, shaking her head at him, blinded by her Buffy-ness, as usual.

"Yeah, well…you always do, to me, pet," Spike said, with conviction, as they walked up the sidewalk to the front door.

Spike opened the door for her and they walked in. The maitre’d’s podium was directly in front of them. Beyond it they could see into the dining area, completely filled with very nicely dressed diners; seemingly, all couples. Alongside the inside walls near the door were padded benches; completely filled with people.

A nice looking middle age man walked up to the maitre’d’s station and asked Spike, "May I have your name and time of your reservation?"

"Uh, reservation?" Spike stammered.

"Of course, sir," said the maitre’d looking at Spike rather askance, "it’s Valentine’s Day! We’re only seating those with reservations."

"Bloody Hell!" Spike said rather loudly, causing those sitting on the benches to look at him and Buffy.

"It’s okay, we can go somewhere else," Buffy said, pulling at his arm.

"I’m afraid you’ll have the same problem at all the other restaurants, sir. They’ve all been booked up for weeks," said the maitre’d.

Buffy watched in surprise, as all of a sudden, an older woman came from a door on the opposite side of the dining room, "Master Worthington, is that you?" she said, with an Irish brogue, coming up and giving Spike a hug.

Spike took a moment to gather his wits about him before he said, "Edna, how lovely to see you again," he said hugging her back, "I told you to call me William," he said, smiling at the older woman, who was positively beaming at Spike.

She giggled, "Okay, William it is. And who is your lovely friend?" she asked.

"This is," he started, looking over at Buffy, "Elizabeth," he said.

Buffy smiled at Edna and extended her hand, "Nice to meet you, how do you know Sp, William?" she asked.

"Oh, William here has helped me lots over the years. He’s a godsend; taken over right where his father and grandfather left off. His grandfather helped me save this old place, paid for a new roof, even paid off the deed to my house when it was going into bankruptcy," said Edna, beaming still.

"I’m sorry, where are my manners? Did you come for dinner? Of course you did, hold on," she said, going over to the maitre’d and looking over the guest book.

"Oh dear, oh dear," she said, returning to Buffy and Spike, "if it was any other night of the year, I would have the mairte’d give you the best table there is! But as it is, I have absolutely no tables available until after 11:00PM and that’s way too late to eat for a young couple, such as yourselves. What I can do, if you don’t mind, is to feed you right in the kitchen area. There’s a little room off of the pantry and I’ll set that up for you, how would you like that?" Edna asked, hopefully.

Spike looked at Buffy, questioningly. Buffy nodded.

"That would be fine, Edna," Spike said, as they started to follow Edna, to the glares of the other diners-in-waiting.

"It’s more than generous, we just drove up from L.A., spur of the moment trip, so it’s not your fault you didn’t have an opening," Spike said.

Once in the kitchen, Edna bade them to wait, while she set up a table in the little room off of the pantry.

Buffy looked at the candy-apple green walls, with all the old kitchen pots and pans hung up decoratively. The cooking utensils, pots, and pans they used now seemed much more modern, but she could see that probably some of those hanging had been used at one time.

Edna motioned for Buffy and Spike to follow her, so they left the kitchen and went into the little room she had set up. There was a small table with two old fashioned high back wooden chairs, with cushioned red velvet seats. The table was set with a white linen table cloth and napkins, crystal long stem glasses for wine, shorter ones for water, real silver utensils, and two candles and candle holders of crystal, with two, lit, red candles.

She handed them two menus, "I’ll be back in a few minutes to take your order, young William. Is there anything I can bring you to drink, first?" she asked them.

Spike looked at Buffy, "Bu, Elizabeth, would you like some wine or champagne?" he asked.

"Okay," she answered, almost too overwhelmed by everything to speak.

"Champagne, then," Spike ordered for them.

"Very good, Master Worthington, I mean William," said Edna with a giggle.

She left then and Buffy turned to Spike, "How? What? How do you know Edna?"

"Wait, I’ll tell you over dinner," he said, handing Buffy a menu.

Buffy took it from him, just shaking her head. The man was full of surprises; that was for sure!

Edna came back with the champagne and poured a little bit in a glass for ‘William’s’ approval.

Spike swirled and sniffed, and gave Edna a smile and nod. She returned the smile and poured the glasses for him and Buffy.

"Elizabeth, do your people come from across the pond, too?" Edna asked her.

"Huh?" Buffy said, trying to think what she meant, then realizing it, England, Ireland, UK, "oh, maybe some of them, on my mom’s side," she answered.

"Thought so, with a name like Elizabeth," she said, smiling at Buffy.

Then turning to Spike, she said, "Young William, you so remind me of your father! Your grandfather too, that is, what I can remember of him."

"So I’ve been told, Edna, so I’ve been told," he replied, looking up over his champagne glass at Buffy, whose mouth was open.

"Our young William has taken over where his father left off, helping me when I’ve needed it, looking after things. Why his grandfather even paid for my Lawrence to go to school out East."

Edna finally said, "Oh, look at me going on, when two people are starvin’ for dinner. Now, what can I get you? And don’t be cheap, it’s on me!"

"No, I can’t let you do that, Edna, I’ll pay," Spike said.

"You can and you will young William, or I’ll be terribly insulted," insisted Edna.

Spike sighed, "Okay, Edna, you win. Elizabeth, what would you like?" he asked.

Buffy had been so taken up in moment; she’d not even looked at the menu. She hurriedly took a look, finally giving Edna her order.

"I’ll have the Shrimp and Scallop Fettuccini," she said.

"Very good, and you, Master Worthington?" she asked.

"I’ll take the Prime Rib, rare; very rare," Spike ordered.

"Ahhh, just like your father; always liked his meat rare, too!" Edna said, getting the rest of their side orders.

"If there’s nothing else, then I’ll leave you two alone," she said, with a wink and walked out the door, stopping to use the light dimmer.

Buffy looked at Spike, mouth open. She closed it, then said, "Who are you, William? adding, "William Worthington?"

"Maybe you need to drink some of this champagne first," Spike suggested, smiling.

CHAPTER 9 - GOLDRUSH

Buffy took a long drink of her champagne, "Okay, spill," she said.

"What do you want to know first luv?" he asked.

She just looked at him, "How long have you known Edna and what's this about your father?"

"Well, as you could probably guess, there is no father or grandfather, just me," he said, looking at her, wondering how much he should tell her.

"Maybe you should tell me first how you came to own the place we're going to," Buffy said.

They were interrupted as Edna entered with the soups, salads, and rolls, "Everything okay? Need anything else right now?" she asked.

"Spike looked at Buffy, "Need anything else Elizabeth? Something else to drink?" Spike asked her.

She shook her head.

"We're fine, thanks, Edna," Spike said, smiling at her.

"I'll be back with your dinner in about 15 minutes, then," Edna said, leaving them alone once again.

Spike waited until Edna had walked out of the pantry, then turned to Buffy, "How did I come to own my place? Well, as you know, I got 'turned' in 1880. Well, my brother had been hearing about the 'Great Goldrush' taking place in California, here in Julian, in fact, since the mid 1870's; had been talkin’ about it for about that long, too. He was always a shrewd businessman; a real prick; cruel even, but shrewd when it came to business investments."

Spike stopped to butter a roll and hand it to Buffy, who took it from him.

"Enjoying the soup?" he asked.

"Ummm, yes," she said, "continue, please."

"Okay," he said," taking a spoonful, himself.

"Not really my thing, but pretty tasty. Clam Chowder."

"Spike!" Buffy said.

"Okay, okay! So, my brother decided that he would someday come here and mine for gold. However, he had other obligations to take care of at the time, so he just purchased about 1000 acres through his solicitor in 1875. One thousand prime acres right in the middle of the richest gold mines ever found in California at that time; bought them for practically half-pences per acre; um, pennies. Use to brag to anyone who would listen how he was going to come here and strike it rich. Braggin' as if he'd already had the gold in his hands," Spike said, not without some rancor.

"So what happened? Did he come here? Find gold?" Buffy asked.

"What happened? You want to know what happened?" Spike looked at her, his eyes taking on a hard glint; "can't you guess?"

Buffy looked at him. He had been so gentle with her, with Edna all this time, all of a sudden he sounded so bitter, so...hurt?"

"I don't know what happened, Spike. I wasn't there. Why don't you just tell me," she said, then added, "it doesn't matter to me, not really, not anymore. It was a long time ago, you were...different."

Spike sort of snorted, "Yeah, I was different. Newly vamped, running on pure demon energy, demon rage; rage against all those who had made my life a hell when I was human. Number one target, as you may have guessed - my brother!" Spike said, getting visibly upset. He stopped to get a grip on his emotions, sensing Buffy getting upset. He wanted this weekend to be for her, not about him.

"I'm sorry, Buffy," Spike said, looking at her.

"It's alright, continue," she told him.

"Sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay, then. So, without going into details, I killed my brother; made him suffer, like he did me when I was human," Spike said, "raided his valuables and didn’t think much about it again."

"Then quite a few years later, I got to thinking about that property up here, all that stuff he'd been saying about it, about the gold, about the land. So, I find this deed in with the stuff I’d taken and pretty much forgotten about, except for the stuff I used right away."

Buffy looked at Spike, "And then what?"

"Well, then I had to wait until a long time had passed, in order to claim I was a legitimate, lost heir to his deed, so as to not draw suspicion, or have to make too many explanations," Spike said.

"So around 1900 or so, I find a vampire who’d once been a solicitor in life," he said, then quipped, "you know what they call solicitors or lawyers, don’t you?"

"What?" asked Buffy, stuffing a piece of tomato in her mouth.

"Bloodsuckers!" Spike said, laughing.

"Funny, funny…go on with the story," Buffy said, interested in this past of his she knew nothing about.

"Okay, so I talk to this guy and he tells me what I need to know to get the deed put into my name, William Worthington, long lost first cousin of Henry Worthington."

"After that was all done, I decided that I would come here one day and see it for myself. Well, when Dru, Angel, Darla, and I first got to this country we stayed out east for a number of years. I still wasn’t ready to break off on my own and come west. Besides, the trip then was arduous; certainly not something I was prepared to do, even as a vampire; especially as a vampire."

"Around 1920, just as Hollywood started to really get into movie making and there was all this glitter and glamour thing going on, the gang decides that would be the place to make a go of it; easy pickings and all that," Spike said. "Of course, I had a lot to do with that mindset; kept showing them articles and all that, really just trying to position myself to come up here and have a look around."

"Did they know about your property?" Buffy asked.

"No, never told another living soul that I was close with. Except for you. And Clem."

Just then Edna brought the food; Buffy Shrimp and Scallop Fettuccini and Spike a very rare, large Prime Rib, and baked potatoes.

"Here’s your dinner, hope you enjoy it," Edna said, smiling at them, "anything else I can get you, Master William? Elizabeth?"

"No, thank you," Buffy said.

"No, this is fine, it’s perfect," Spike said, smiling warmly at Edna, as Buffy looked on.

"Okay, you two enjoy your meal, I’ll be back in a little while to see if there’s anything else you need," Edna said, smiling warmly at them, especially Spike, whom she gave a wink as she left.

"Oooh, this looks so good!" Buffy said, "much better than that French weird stuff last night!"

"Even the pears dipped in brandy and sauce?" Spike asked a bit snarkily, then wished he hadn’t.

Buffy put her hand on top of his, as he was about to cut into the steak, "Yes, much better; even if we were at McDonalds, it would still be much better," she finished, then looking him in the eyes.

Spike didn’t say anything, just put his fork down and place his hand on top of hers, sandwiching it between both of his.

Finally, Buffy spoke, removing her hand gently, "Tell me how you know Edna."

Spike started cutting his steak again, "Well, once the gang and I settled near Hollywood, I decided to come up here by myself; have a look around. It wasn’t too hard to find someone who would take me out to the area. Even at night I could tell it was a pristine place; a beautiful place. However, I needed to have a way to get some money out of my brother’s investment, so through a solicitor here, I sold some acres, had some mined, and kept about 100 acres for myself," Spike said.

"Gold and land was the best investment I could have ever had, had to thank my dead brother for that one. When everyone else got burned by the stock market crashed, my money was all in gold and land; didn’t lose a thing, made more money, in fact."

"Funny thing was, by the time I ever laid eyes on this place, the gold rush was long over. About 4 - 5 million in gold ore was taken out of this area by 1879. But I had held onto 1000 acres of prime land during that time, land that had never been mined, as of yet; land that wound up yielding almost as much as the original claims had 50 years before."

"I started another gold rush into this area, though a much smaller one, one that was limited to only the amount of investors I sold to. I sold land in about 10 to 100 acre parcels, so there weren’t nearly as many people as had come in the first rush. Of course, each of those investors also had to bring their own work crews, etc."

"And I only sold to investors who promised they wouldn’t totally strip the land bare and would replant trees and fill in the new mines, once they were through. It was right in the contract and if they didn’t, I’d just come back and kill them if I saw they were abusing their privilege."

"What privilege was that, Spike?" Buffy asked.

"The privilege of being a steward of this land, of course," Spike answered, indignantly, "I knew even then, that this was a piece of paradise that was worth preserving."

"So you were the original environmentalist, then?" Buffy asked, laughing, as she twirled a piece of Fettuccini on her fork.

"Well, not original, but I was ahead of my time. Did a lot of reading about American Indians and their philosophy of the land and all that. Sound like a freakin’ poof, don’t I? Worse still, a member of Greenpeace," Spike said, rolling his eyes, heavenward.

"Not at all, it’s nice, Spike. I mean, strange, but really nice that you think that way, even…"Buffy said.

"Even though I’m a vampire and have spent lots more time destroying than saving, you mean?" he said.

"I guess. I just would never have guessed you for…I never much thought about how you thought about these issues. See, I don’t even have time to think about them, wish that I did; wish I had time for deep, long, philosophical debates on issues, on history, on God, the universe, the meaning of life, death, all of it…I just don’t. No time for Buffy to have…to think what ifs…" Buffy put down her fork, her eyes tearing up.

"Shit! No, Buffy!" Spike said, "please, don’t get upset. I wanted this to be a nice weekend for you, a time for you to rest, not think about all of…everything else," Spike said, wiping a tear off of her face.

"Probably wouldn’t understand all that stuff anyway. Never that good of a student," Buffy said with a little sniffle.

"Buffy, don’t you ever, ever let me hear you talk about yourself that way!" Spike said.

"You are the smartest, bravest person I know. It’s not your fault that you haven’t had time to study different philosophies, which by the way, most are full of shit, or continued your studies. Not your fault." Spike said.

"But how many of those armchair philosophers will ever know the name of the person who saved the world for them, more than once? Saved it so’s they could have their little useless debates about stuff, that, in the long run, doesn’t mean a thing; not if the world ends! That’s your contribution, Buffy, and don’t you ever forget it. It’s priceless, YOU ARE PRICELESS! Spike said, forcefully, taking Buffy’s chin in his hand and looking into her eyes.

Buffy looked back into his, "You always have believed in me, haven’t you?" she asked.

"Always! Until the end of the world and beyond!" Spike answered verbally, while his eyes told of his deep feelings he always had, would always have for her.

Spike! Her knight in slightly tarnished, bruised, and broken armor, but to her, he shined all the same.

"Thank you, Spike. If I haven’t told you lately; I believe in you, too."

To the end of the world and beyond!

Spike looked at her with that look of wonder he so rarely showed, the look reserved just for her, the look he gave her when she’d come to rescue him from The First; a look of hope, belief, wonder, and undying, unfaltering love. For her.

Slowly, he took his hand off of her face, "You should eat, Buffy, luv, your food’s going to get cold," he said.

"Okay," Buffy answered, "but you still haven’t answered how you know Edna."

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