Buffy was glad William had eaten a while before they’d gotten on the road again. Although his stomach hadn’t been upset since earlier he’d argued, she’d convinced him to take half a Dramamine, just in case.

With Xander’s direction, Willow took a turn at the wheel for a couple of hours, until the next gas fill-up.

When Xander started to drive, William had asked Willow to ‘google’ the internal combustion engine. When she had, he went up front and sat with Xander for a while, asking questions from the diagram on the laptop.

"I wish I knew more about this sort of thing," William said.

"Maybe you could take a course in mechanics, once you get back to California," Xander suggested.

"They have those? Maybe I’ll do that. That way, if Elizabeth’s car was making strange noises, like Leroy’s was, I’d know how to fix it, just like you did."

Xander felt rather flattered, "Yeah, and don’t forget about that old DeSoto of yours."

William nodded, "Yes, Elizabeth told me I have an older model car."

"Maybe you should take a course on electrical things, too. Seeing as…"

"As I don’t remember anything?"

"Not that you used electricity much," Xander mumbled, mostly to himself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," Xander said. "You should think of looking into learning to drive, too."

William didn’t say anything. There was so much. Here he was thinking of learning ‘mechanics,’ and he didn’t even know how to drive a car. Plus, just looking at all the cars on the highway and the speed of things passing by, was making him almost nauseous again.

"I don’t know where it is you guys live now," Xander continued, "but I’m guessing that it’s not in middle of a pedestrian friendly, major city, And in California, you need a car to get from one place to another."

"I suppose," William sighed, then looked over to Xander, hopefully. "Might you possibly teach me?"

"You want me to…? Damn Spike! I mean, William. But I can’t. Not in this, it’s way too big, and there won’t be enough time, not to mention, learning on the highways, not such a good idea. I’m sure Buffy can teach you when you get back to California. Or maybe Clem," Xander said, laughing. "On the other hand, better stick with Buffy."

"Why? Doesn’t Clem drive?"

"Yeah, he drives. It’s just…oh never mind, you’ll see."

"Hey guys, what’s up?" Buffy asked, coming up to the front.

"Just talking to William here about learning to drive."

"Oh?" she asked, sitting down on William’s lap, looking at him.

"Yeah, I told him you’ll teach him, once you get back home. Isn’t that right, Buffy?"

"Sure," she said smiling, "whenever he’s ready to learn."

"Oh, and Buffy?"

"Yeah, Xander?"

"Get off William’s lap. If a cop sees you, he’ll pull me over. Unrestrained and all that."

There was a joke in there somewhere, but she decided to let it go. She got up.

"How much longer?"

"About 2 hours."

"You need anything Xander? A drink? Something to eat? A break?"

"No, I’m fine. Need to talk to Angela though, can you get her?"

"Sure, will do," Buffy said, walking back.

"Well, I’ll move back so you can speak to your wife. Thank you for your advice, Xander. I’ll consider all that we talked about."

"You’re welcome, William," Xander said, smiling. This new and improved Spike was way easier to deal with than the old one.

A little more than an hour later, the RV crossed the Mississippi River, at the border of Illiniois and Missouri, and into the city of St. Louis. They all crowded around the windows looking at the city’s famous Gateway Arch. Willow had ‘googled’ some information about it.

Willow read to them, "The Gateway Arch was finished in 1965 and it says, ‘What stood before the world was a magnificent monument to Westward expansion designed to last 1,000 years.’ It’s made of stainless steel and stands 630 feet high. Oh, you can take a tram to the top from either the north or south sides. ‘On your way to the top using the south leg, you'll return to an era in the 1800s when the St. Louis riverfront was bustling with steamboats, fur traders, and merchants. On your way to the top using the north leg, you'll be transported back to 1965 when construction workers wedged the last triangular Arch section into place.’

Ooh, riverboat cruises on the Mississippi, too."

"What’s a tram, daddy?" Alex asked.

"It’s like a little train. See that arch? There’s a tram that goes all the way to the top?"

"Really? Can we stop? I wanna go to the top! Please daddy!"

"See what you started," Xander said, smiling back at Willow, "we can’t today. We have to get to our campground, then we’re going to see grandma and grandpa tomorrow. You want to see grandma and grandpa, don’t you?"

"Yessss, but I still want to ride the tram to the top of the arch!"

"Tell you what, we’ll do it on the way back home, okay? Promise!"

"Scout’s honor, daddy?" he asked holding up his ‘scout’ pledge fingers.

"Scout’s honor, Alex," Xander replied, doing the same.

"Hmmm…Mark Twain, Louis Armstrong…" Willow continued. "Oh…Lewis and Clark started their 8000 mile expedition from here. Journeyed up the Missouri River, across the Rocky’s…down the Columbia…to the Pacific…specimens of plant, animal, mineral resources. Info on American Indian culture…enabled U.S. to claim the Oregon region, which includes Oregon, Washington, and Idaho. Impressive."

Buffy sat down next to William on one of the couches, "What do you think?"

"It’s…sort of scary and exciting at the same time. The idea of the ‘gateway to the west.’ I used to read all about the prairie, buffalo, and of course, the Indians, when I was a young lad back in England. Read Lewis and Clark’s adventures, and the goldrush…goldrush," he said getting a funny look on his face.

"Well, don’t think you’ll see any buffalo, probably not much in the way of open prairie anymore, either," she said, hoping he wouldn’t go back to the last thing he’d said.

William sat there trying to remember something that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. His head was beginning to hurt, and he wasn’t comfortable looking out on the big city. He laid his head back on the couch and closed his eyes.

"You alright?" Buffy asked.

"Little bit of a headache."

"You want some aspirin?"

"No, I’ll be alright, just rest my eyes for a few minutes."

"Okay," she said, giving his hand a squeeze.

It took them another hour to get to the campground outside of Montgomery City. Lazyday Campground was set in a small country setting, in a beautiful, wooded location, away from all outside noise.

Xander signed in, and got their lot number and drove the RV to it’s spot. It was 3:00pm and they’d gone the first 450 miles or so of their journey.

Once stopped, Xander and Angela extended the overhanging shade off of the side of the RV, so there would be shade. Took out an outdoor grill, put out lawn chairs, and covered the picnic table that came with their site with a plastic cover.

Dawn and Willow went off to the campground’s little store for some charcoal, fluid, marshmallows, and things to make S’mores. Buffy and William helped Xander and Angela set up the 3-room tent that Xander’s family would spend the night, while Alex stood by the portable playpen watching Ann.

The campground boasted a swimming pool, groceries, video rental, club/game room, and a three-acre lake, and three ponds, all stocked.

Dawn and Willow returned, and along with Angela, the baby, and Buffy, decided they’d go to the swimming pool, before starting to get dinner ready.

"Buffy was going to ask William if he wanted to come along, when Xander announced, ""Okay, us men are going to go do some manly fishing, see if we can catch something for dinner. That okay?" he asked Angela.

She nodded.

"How about you, partner? Want to help daddy catch some fish?"

"Okay. Can I go swimming later then?"

"We’ll have to see how late it is, Alex. So you have to decide if you want to go swimming with mommy or fishing with daddy and William, if William wants to go," he said, looking over at William, who nodded his assent.

Alex took a minute to think about it. "I’ll go fishing with you, Daddy. I can swim another time."

"Good boy, Alex," Xander said, smiling.

"William? You might want to put on some old clothes, instead of the ones you have on."

"I don’t really have any old clothes. Everything is pretty new."

"Wait, what about the ones with the grease on them? From last night? You could wear those," Buffy reminded him. "I’ll go find them, I have to find my bathing suit, anyway."

He nodded, "I’ll be right back, after I change," he said to Xander.

"I’ll take Alex to the store and get the bait, then we’ll meet you back here in about 10 minutes."

"Alright."

William found Buffy in the bedroom going through the bag of dirty laundry, "Here they are," she said, handing him the pants and shirt, he’d worn the night before.

Buffy closed and locked the door, and drew the curtains, before starting to take her clothes off. William was doing the same, when he glanced over at Buffy. She had just put on her bathing suit bottom, when he stopped what he was doing and stared at her, moved by her beauty. The naturalness that had developed between them, allowing her to undress in front of him without hesitation was just one of the wonderful turns his life had taken.

He smiled and reached out suddenly, pulling her into an embrace, and kissed her.

His smile was infectious, and she giggled, as she kissed him back. He sat down on the bed and pulled her over so that she was standing between his legs. He kissed her breasts, licked at her nipples, one hand on her waist, the other around her back.

Her hands moved to play in his hair, rub his neck, as she moaned softly, going from zero to fifty in seconds flat on the ‘lust-o-meter,’ as her knees begin to weaken, and her sex starting to throb in anticipation of his hands, his mouth, his cock.

"This isn’t fishing," she teased, panting.

"Don’t want fishing, want you," he said, as he raised his head, catching her mouth in a deep kiss.

"Want you, too," she murmured, "but…"

Just then, they heard Alex outside the RV.

The both groaned.

"Later?" she asked.

William nodded, enthusiastically.

A few minutes later, William joined Xander and Alex outside the RV. Xander was sorting out his fishing poles, while Alex was busy trying to catch a minnow.

"Wanna see the little fishies?" he asked William.

"Certainly," he said, coming over to kneel down next to Alex, "there’s lots of them."

"Uh-huh. Wanna hold one?"

"Won’t it kill them?"

"Not if you don’t hold it too long," Alex said, handing him one in the palm of his hand.

The minnow flopped around, while William and Alex looked at it, "It’s pretty. Let’s put it back now, though," he said.

"Okay," said Alex, catching the wiggling fish and putting it back into the bucket.

"We have worms, too. Big ones!" Alex said. "Want to see those?"

Before he could answer, Xander called, "Let’s go Alex, William!"

"Okay," they answered.

"Here’s a fishing pole for you, William," Xander said, handing him one, "and here’s yours, Alex."

Alex grabbed his, "This is mine, my daddy bought it for me for my birthday last year!" he proudly told William.

"It’s very nice, Alex. Your daddy is a nice man to buy you such a nice fishing pole."

Alex nodded, "My daddy is a nice man!" he agreed, skipping ahead to hold Xander’s hand, after giving William a smile.

They walked about 1/8 of a mile to the lake. There was a wooden pier that was about 20’ x 6’ that they walked to the end of.

Xander helped Alex put a worm on his, then helped him cast.

William stood there watching Xander put a minnow on his, and made a slight face, which Xander caught.

"Worm, minnow, or chicken liver?" he asked.

"Chicken liver?" William asked, confused.

Xander explained that the crappies in the lake were most likely to go for the minnows, the catfish liked worms and chicken livers, and that trout could be caught with worms, or ‘flies’ if they were fishing with a ‘flyrod,’ which they didn’t have.

"So, you use different bait for the different kinds of fish?"

"That’s about it, but it’s not set in stone, just a general rule. Different diets for different types of fish. So, what’ll it be?"

"Um, worms for trout, I guess."

"Good choice. As for eating, I much prefer trout to catfish," Xander said, handing him the little bait pail full of worms.

William opened it up, and saw the long brown worms crawling about in the black dirt. Taking a deep breath, he pulled one out, then dropped it. Alex giggled. He tried again, and held it tighter this time.

Xander grabbed his hook on the line and handed it to him. Just hook him a couple of times, like this," he said, doing one for himself on his hook.

William copied Xander, trying hard not to make a face at having to puncture the worm with the hook, and the worm guts that came out on his hand.

Xander laughed, "Here," he said, handing him a rag.

"Thanks."

Next, Xander showed him how to hold the pole and when to release the reel when casting.

After a couple of false starts, he got the hang of it.

"Didn’t your daddy ever teach you how to fish?" Alex asked, coming up next to William.

William shook his head, "My daddy didn’t fish, "he said, trying to remember his father’s face, "or if he did, he didn’t show me how."

"What did your daddy do?" Alex asked.

"He was a solicitor, a lawyer. He used to help poor people in court," he said.

"Oh," Alex said, looking like deep in thought, "Where is he?"

"He’s not living anymore."

"I’m sorry."

"It’s okay, Alex. It was a long time ago."

"Hey, think I got something," Xander said, suddenly, as the fishing pole bent. He pulled up, then reeled in a 12" trout. "Hey, hey! Not a too bad start! Alex, get me the cooler.

"Here daddy."

Xander put the fish into the cooler.

They stayed for about an hour. Each of them getting small bites and losing their bait, but not catching anything.

"Why don’t we try out one of those ponds?" Xander asked.

They tried the first pond and nothing was biting, then the second.

"Hey, Alex! You got one," Xander said, watching the pole. "Okay, pull it up hard. That’s it, now reel it in."

"Good job!" Xander said, as he reeled in a 7" crappie.

"I’m going to eat this one!" Alex said.

"I think I’ve got one, too," William said, as Xander was helping Alex take his fish off the hook.

"Okay, do what I told Alex. Pull up hard, then reel it in."

"Okay. Oh drats!" William said, as the line went slack.

"Lost it, huh?"

"Yes," he said, looking sadly at the empty hook, "got my worm, though.

He pulled out another worm and put it on his hook. A few minutes later, he had his first fish, another trout, smaller than Xander’s, but still one to keep.

"Congratulations, William," Xander said, "you caught your first fish!"

Just then Angela came up to join them.

"Mommy, mommy! I caught a crappie," Alex said.

"You did? That’s wonderful!"

"Where’s Ann?" Xander asked.

"She’s laying down for a nap. Elizabeth is with her. Dawn and Willow are still at the pool.

"Can I go swimming now?"

Angela laughed, "That’s why I came. I found out they close the pool in an hour, so I wanted to know if Alex wanted to get in some swimming first."

"You don’t want to fish anymore?" Xander asked.

Alex looked undecided.

"That’s alright. You go swimming. Maybe we’ll go fishing later again."

"Okay," Alex said, taking Angela’s hand.

"Tell Buffy that William caught a fish, too," Xander said, looking over at William, who smiled at her.

"I will. I think she wanted me to check up on how that was going, too," she said, winking at William.

"We’ll come back soon."

"Okay, good luck boys!"

After she’d left, Xander suggested they try the third pond.

The last pond was farther away than the other two had been to each other, and was the smallest one. They walked along in silence until they got there.

Xander starting to cast his line, knocked into William, who had been squatting down next to him, getting a worm.

"Oh, sorry about that," Xander said, "didn’t see you there; left side you know."

"No, I’m sorry. I should have said something," William said, then paused. "If you don’t mind my asking, how did you lose your eye?"

Xander turned to him, "You really don’t remember, do you?"

William looked at him and shook his head.

Xander sighed, thinking how he should put it, "This guy Caleb, he did it to me. You were there; you pushed him off me, before he could get my other one. Guess I should have thanked you back then."

"Oh, my God!" William said, feeling sick at the thought of something so violent. Something he’d been involved in?

"There…there was a fight?"

"You could say that," Xander said, darkly, trying hard to control his emotions over something he’d put behind him for the past 5 years.

"And I…I was in the fight?"

"Yeah, Spike, you were there. Fighting the good fight."

William shook his head.

"Why were we fighting this…Caleb?" William asked. It was hard to imagine himself being in a fight, let alone in one where something so horrible had happened to Xander.

"Eh, you know. The normal kind of fight for Sunnydale, good vs. evil."

Good vs. evil?

"I’m sorry. I don’t remember," William said, pausing, "and I’m sorry…I’m sorry I wasn’t able to push him off you before…"

"It’s alright. You were trying to get Buffy out of there, while I was trying to get Kennedy and the others out of there."

"Elizabeth? She was there? While there was a fight? She wasn’t hurt…was she?" William asked, his heart pounding. What kind of a man had he been? To have been somewhere with Elizabeth, while there was a fight? Kennedy, Willow’s bird? Others?

"Um, no. I guess not. Not more than…" he looked over at William, who had turned a sickly green color. He’d almost said, ‘not more than normal, being the slayer,’ but had caught himself in time. Xander sighed. "Not more than a tiny bit, from you pushing her out of the way. Don’t worry about it, William. It was a long time ago."

"Xander? What did you mean by good vs. evil?"

"Nothing, William. Just rattling on," Xander said, evasively. He looked at William who appeared to still be waiting for some sort of answer. "You know what I mean, good guys and bad guys; just the normal kinds of stuff. Let’s just say that Caleb was a big mouthed bastard and leave it at that."

"Alright," William said, after a pause, "I didn’t mean to…"

"No, don’t worry about it. I didn’t mean for you to get upset."

William went back to putting a worm on his hook and casting. They fished in silence for a few minutes.

"You know, everybody talks ‘around’ me," William said.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, that everybody talks, but when it comes to the past, especially my past, nobody really says anything. Like you're all trying to protect me."

"Hmm…well, you’ve been through a lot. Guess we just don't want you to worry about things that you can’t do anything about," Xander answered.

"Xander? Can I ask you something?"

"Um, sure. What is it?"

"What did I do back in Sunnydale? What was I?"

"What do you mean?" Xander asked, dreading this conversation more and more by the second.

"I mean," William said, keeping his eyes on his fishing pole, "What did I do? To make a living?"

Xander let out a breath, "I don’t know, think you did freelance work," he answered.

William was about to ask what he meant, when all of a sudden he got a pull on his line, "Hey!"

"Got one? Good!" Xander said, relieved to veer away from the topic at hand to fishing instead.

They fished for another half-hour and each caught enough fish to make it a worthwhile dinner for them all. It had been the best pond yet.

William had decided to drop the subject, to which Xander had been grateful.

The girls were all sitting outside on lawn chairs when Xander and William returned.

"How was fishing?’ Dawn asked.

"Enough for dinner?" Willow asked.

"Good and yes, to answer your questions. Just dropping off these poles, then I’ll go over to the fish cleaning station and take care of these."

"Want me to go with you?" William asked.

"If you want. You don’t have to, though, I got it covered."

"Oh. Okay. If you’re sure."

"Yeah, I’m good," Xander said. He didn’t want any more awkward moments alone with William for now.

"Where’s Elizabeth?" William asked Dawn.

"Down at the bathrooms. She decided to take a shower before dinner."

"Oh, okay," William said, "I’ll be inside, then."

"Okay, William," Dawn said.

On the way down to the station, Xander ran into Buffy on the way back from her shower.

"Hey, Xander," she said smiling, "how was fishing?"

"Not bad, not bad," he answered, and told her all about their catches.

"Good. Where’s William?" she asked.

"Back at the RV. Listen, Buff, I got to tell you something."

"What?" she asked, looking worried.

Xander proceeded to tell her about his conversation regarding his eye, the fight, and William’s questions.

"Oh God!" Buffy groaned.

"It’s not that bad, I deflected most of his questions, but it was getting real uncomfortable. You know…you have to tell him something one of these days. He’s not stupid. Neither was Spike. Now I know where, or rather who, he got if from. He knows we're talking around him, around what really happened, who he was, what he was, what our lives were like in Sunnydale."

"Yeah, well, Xander, what should I do? Tell him he was a vampire that killed people for 100 years? But then went out and got a soul? Died saving the world, but then came back human again? How’s he going to digest all that information? You know what he’d do? I think he’d retreat so far into himself, that he would disappear. Either that, or run off. You didn’t see him when he was bad, after he was out of the hospital; didn’t see him shake all night in fear, cry…"

"I know, Buffy, but…"

"He’s still fragile, Xander," Buffy said, eyes imploring him to understand. "You have no idea, of just how fragile he is inside. Do you have any idea how much that would hurt him?"

Xander nodded, "Yeah, I think I’ve got an idea. He got pretty upset when I let it slip that you were around during the fight. Thank God, I didn’t say that you were fighting; he probably would have fainted. Still, one day…"

"Yeah, maybe one day… What do you tell Angela about the past, speaking of talking around a subject? Does she know?"

"Of course not. I mean, she knows about all of you and high school, Sunnydale. I just don’t tell her anything about demons, vampires, werewolves, or witches," he said, laughing.

"Well, that leaves out a huge percentage of what our lives were about," Buffy agreed, laughing, too.

"True. But I’m still not having to hide who Angela from Angela, like you are Spike from William."

Buffy nodded and sighed, "I know. I just want to get him home. I just want him to be safe. And I just want us…it’s been so good…between us. I never thought...never thought I'd ever see him again, except in my dreams, never thought I'd have a chance. We'd have a chance," Buffy said, without finishing, knowing it would make Xander squirm to hear her say words of love and caring about Spike. What she'd wanted to say was that she never thought she'd have a chance in this lifetime again to get it right. With him. With Spike. Or William, if that was the incarnation he remained as.

Every moment she was without him now, even momentarily, made her uneasy, fearful. She knew her mind was being unreasonable. Stupid mind. Since the first time she saw him in the hospital up to now, she couldn't stop touching him when he was around, couldn't stop looking at him. Couldn’t still believe he was real.

To her, he was still a miracle, and that fact would never get old. She couldn't say this to Xander, to anybody. To say it, meant to admit that she was as vulnerable to the pain as he was, and she was still The Slayer, in her friend's eyes. And partly, in her own, too. At least, now that it came to dealing with the danger Spike had been in, and the threats that still lingered somewhere on the horizon, in spite of Willow’s protection spell. Somebody had to be strong, had to fight for...

A normal life? No, scratch that, she didn't quite know what to do with the one she'd been living for 5 years anyway, and she doubted any life with Spike or William would just be shades of normal. Just having a life, together, that's what she wanted. 'Normal,' be damned!

Instead, she said to Xander, "I can’t…I don’t want…if I tell him, I’ll break his heart. His whole idea, of who he thinks he is, who he really is inside, will crumple. And he is a good man, he was before he died, and I don't just mean by Drusilla's hand, but before Sunnydale...collapsed," Buffy said, pacing back and forth in front of Xander.

"I don't know what to do, if I don’t tell him, I’m lying to him. Fuck! Why can’t he just be happy? Why can’t he be happy, safe, whole? Why? Why do I have to make these choices? Why do I have to choose how to hurt him less? I don’t want to hurt him at all. Not anymore, not again," Buffy said, looking at Xander with desperation in her eyes. "Didn't he already pay the price, Xander? Pay in pain and suffering and his own death? Again? How fucking much does Spike have to pay? Does William?"

Xander flinched, her anguish coming out in language he wasn't used to hearing from her. He shook his head, "Or you? You forgot to mention that you've paid the price, too," Xander said. "I don’t know the answers to your questions, Buffy. You know I only want the best for you, and I know when the time comes, you’ll do what’s best. You always do. You'll help him through it. You are helping him. You've gotten him on his feet, and he's coping fairly well."

" My God, Buffy! Compared to what you helped him with in the past," he let out a soft whistle, "when he came back with his soul and was insane, when The First was messing with his head... this should be the easy part. Will be the easy part."

"You really believe that? You’re not just saying that? Because believe me, I don’t always know what’s best. You don’t even know some of the mistakes I’ve made…"

"It doesn’t matter, Buffy. You don’t have to be perfect in order to do your best. Nobody expects that from you, not even William, only you expect that from you. That’s what I’m talking about," he said, holding her gaze.

"Oh, and one more thing, I think, no, make that, I know that it’s all going to work out for you this time. For both you and Spike. Together," he said, nodding, conceding her choice.

"That means the world to me, Xander," Buffy said.

"I know. Now, let me get going, or these fish are going to rot before I can clean them."

"Clean away then. I’ll see you back there," she said, giving him a warm hug first.

"Okay, Buffy."

She met up with Angela who was coming back from swimming with Alex.

"Hi, Buffy. Are they boys back yet?"

"Yeah, I just ran into Xander, who’s off to clean the fish."

"Guess he got enough to cook then, huh? That’s good. He usually cooks it too, so that means I don’t have to," she winked.

When they arrived, Willow and Dawn were still sitting outside, Ann was in a little swing, between them.

"Hey guys," Buffy said, "Where’s William?"

"He’s inside."

"Okay, I’m gonna go check on him."

Buffy walked to the back of the RV, and opened the door. William was lying on his side, his face away from her. She closed the door behind her and locked it, and lay down next to him, nuzzling up to his back, as she put her arm around him.

He’d been lying there, thinking about his conversation with Xander. He’d been in a fight, Xander had lost an eye, and Elizabeth had been there! Xander had been evasive about knowing what he, William, did for a living before. It was all, incomprehensible to him, his life, his memories, his past. And everybody talked in a careful, measured way, when it had anything to do with him.

Buffy felt her stomach tighten, at his lack of response. He always responded to her, even in his sleep, if she curled up next to him.

"What is it, William? What’s wrong?"

He didn’t answer her. He didn’t know what was wrong himself.

"Please, William," she said, getting up on her elbow, "talk to me."

"Huh? Elizabeth?" he asked, feigning just awakening, as he turned toward her, felt himself melt at the concern in her eyes.

"You were asleep? I didn’t think you were…oh, nevermind. You’re back," she said, smiling softly at him and putting her hand on his face, caressing it. He closed his eyes, drawn to its attendant comfort, like a moth, to a flame.

"How was fishing?" she asked.

He opened his eyes, "Interesting, a bit of fun. Caught a few fish, but still would have rather been here, like this, with you," he said, giving her a look that melted her, as his lips brushed against her softly.

Her eyes were moist when he pulled back to look at her. He tilted his head at her, questioningly.

"What’s wrong?"

"Nothing," she said, trying to smile, "I just missed you, William."

He smiled at her, shaking his head, "I missed you, too, Elizabeth. Always miss you."

He took her face in his hands and gently brought each part of it to his lips, her eyes, her forehead, her nose, her chin, once again, her mouth.

She moaned, as she kissed him back hard, pressing against him.

He returned it, and they wrestled for dominion in a kissing war, each trying to forget about everything but the moment.

"Now where were we?" William asked, pulling back a little, his hand going under her T-shirt, as a naughty little smile played at the corners of his mouth, "Before I went fishing…?"

END CHAPTER 66

I'd like to have had a much larger update for you, my loyal readers (thank you so much for sticking with this!) but my muse has been 'shirty' lately, confusing me with back-to-school stuff, work, etc. Hopefully, this will tide you over till the next update, I'll try not to take as long!

"Hey, Buffy? Are you still going to help with dinner?" Dawn yelled, outside of the bedroom window a few minutes later.

Buffy and William both groaned.

"Dawn, it’s okay, don’t bother them, we’re okay," Angela said, winking in the direction of the back of the RV.

"Oh, come on, it’s not everyday that I get to relive being the pain-in-the-ass, little sister," Dawn said, smiling with more than a little glee.

"Buffy!" she yelled again.

"I’m going to strangle that Dawn," Buffy said, reluctantly pulling out of William’s grasp.

"You think she…?"

"Oh yeah. She’s just being a pain in my behind, for the sake of it right now!" Buffy grumbled. But at least life wasn’t dire at the moment, belied by the fact that a bit of lighthearted fun could be had, even at her expense.

"Then, please, allow me to help you with the strangulation plan," William said, as he flopped over onto his back, groaning.

"Buffy! Don’t you pay any mind to Dawn, we’ve got it all covered!" Angela yelled up at the window.

William looked up hopefully, but she shook her head, "I can’t. Not now, that they all think they know what we’re up to!"

"Well, they’re right," he said, with a lazy smile, patting the bed, "seems a shame to disappoint…"

"I’d better go help," she sighed, "but you can still rest."

"Didn’t want rest…"

"I know. Later?"

"That’s what you said before," he said, pouting.

"Then I’ll promise and triple swear this time, okay?"

"Hold you to it."

"Know you will," she said, smiling as she walked out of the bedroom.

"Are they always like this?" Xander asked, making a face.

Willow and Dawn both nodded emphatically, "All the time, morning, noon, afternoon, early evening…" Dawn said.

"Let’s not forget mid-morning, late afternoon, middle of the night…"

"God! I’m sorry I asked!"

"Sorry you asked what?" Buffy said, coming down the RV steps.

"Uh, nothing. Nevermind," Xander said, turning red.

Buffy looked at each of her friends. It was clear that Dawn and Willow were busting up inside with laughter.

She walked over to Dawn, looked her in the eye, seriously, then punched her playfully in the arm, "Payback’s a bitch, you know. Dawn meet bitch, bitch, Dawn," she said, grinning.

"Ow," Dawn said, cracking up.

"And so, for dinner…" Xander said, desperately looking for the subject to change to anything other than Buffy’s, obviously, busy-making-up-for-lost-time sex life.

"Yeah, let me go help Angela."

Dawn walked into the RV, just as William was coming through.

"Hi, William," she said, grinning.

"Hello, fun killer," he said softly, giving her a sly, sideways glance, as he was walking by.

"What?" she said, innocently.

"I have a poem for you."

"You do?"

"Want to hear it?"

"Sure," she said, eyeing him cautiously, as if he’d just offered her a case of the plague, "I guess so."

He cleared his throat, "Okay, this is for you, Dawn," he said, pulling out a small slip of paper.

Dawn looked at William, her mouth breaking into an enormous grin, until she finally howled with laughter.

He handed her the paper and bowed with all the false dignity he could muster, trying hard not to laugh along with her.

Overcome by laughter and tickled by William’s attempt to put her in her place, she grabbed him and hugged him hard.

"I’m so glad you’re back and that we’re friends again, Spike," she said, using his familiar name and giving him a kiss on the cheek. Then before he could say anything, she ran off into the bathroom, still laughing.

William came out, a bemused expression on his face.

"What was all the laughter about?" Buffy asked him, puzzled by his look.

"Friendship."

END CHAPTER 67

"Which is mine, daddy? The fishy that I caught?" Alex said, looking down at all the filets.

"These two right here, Alex. See how I took a little notch out of the sides? That was so you'd know they were yours."

"Okay!" Alex said, and skipped off happily to join Willow & Dawn, who had volunteered to take him to the playground before dinner.

Buffy had helped bread the fish, while Angela took a shower. Xander then took over the cooking of the fish. He handed Ann to her, "Okay, Ann, you let Buffy hold you for a while, so daddy can cook the fish."

Buffy sat down in a chair with Ann, who stood on her lap, cooing happily, as she played with Buffy’s hair. Then she saw the necklace and brought it up to look at it, trying to put it into her mouth moments later.

"That’s not food," Buffy laughed.

William had gone inside for a moment. On his way back out, he stopped, to watch Elizabeth sitting with the Xander and Angela’s baby daughter. He smiled, seeing her this way, imagining how it would be, if she were his wife, if it were their child.

Ann tried again, and once again, Buffy gently repelled the mouthing of her necklace.

"You like my birdie necklace don’t you? That's because it's special," she whispered. "See the two lovebirds? William gave this to me a long time ago."

See the initials on the back?" she asked, turning it over, "this was Edna's necklace, and these were her and Wallace's initials. And by design or coincidence, they're the same as Elizabeth and William's! What do you think of them apples? Pretty neat, huh?" she asked, as Ann rubbed her little fingers over the letters.

"Then, after he…after Spike, er, William was… gone, it was waiting for me in Julian, and I’ve never taken it off since! So you see, baby, I can’t let you play with it. But see the birdies? This is William and this is Buffy," she said, looking at Ann and nodding.

See the birdies? This is William and this is Buffy."

"Buh?" Ann said, pointing to the bird on her left.

"Uh-huh. That’s me, and this other one, is William," she said, pointing to the bird on her right.

Ann looked up and pointed at the door, "W’um?"

Buffy looked up. William stood there, smiling, his eyes looking at Elizabeth with adoration and love.

Buffy looked him in the eyes and nodded, "Yes, that’s William. And Buffy and William are protected inside this heart."
 

"My heart," she mouthed to him.

He brought up both his hands and ran them through his hair, overwhelmed.

"My heart," he mouthed back, bringing his right hand down to the middle of his chest.

After dinner that night, they made S’mores and roasted marshmallows. William set quite a few marshmallows on fire, before getting the hang of it. Finally, he learned the art of taking a finely browned marshmallow off of a stick, without getting frustrated by the runny white stuff that stuck to his fingers. He helped Alex with his, too.

Around 11:00pm, they all turned in. Xander wanted to leave extra early again in the morning, as they had at least as long a drive to get half way through Kansas to meet up with Angela’s folks. Xander and his family retired to the tent, the rest of them to the RV.

William had been the last to use the restroom, having let all the women go before him. When he came into their room, Buffy was sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for him. She smiled at him.

He came over and knelt before her. Reaching up, he took the lovebird necklace in his hands. He turned it over to look at the back for a moment, before turning it right again.

"Would you...?"

"Would I what?"

"Tell me the story? About the necklace?"

"Of course I will," Buffy said, stroking his face, "what do you want to know?"

"Everything. I…I meant to ask you about it, ever the hospital, when you gave me the picture of us that I’d drawn and I noticed that you were wearing it, like you were that day you came to see me."

Buffy took a deep breath and began, "The first time you took me to Julian, to show me your house, we stopped at The Rittenhouse Restaurant, for dinner. I told you about the restaurant before, right?"

He nodded.

She continued, "We didn't realize that it was Valentine's Day and all the tables were reserved..."

"I thought you just said I took you to dinner. I didn't realize that it was Valentine's Day?" he asked her, confused.

"Um...well, the point of us coming up to Julian wasn't really dinner, it was just so you could take me away for the weekend. I needed to get away...from everything that was going on in Sunnydale, and you insisted that I get out of town a couple of days, so you brought me up there. The point being that it wasn't for a romantic Valentine's dinner that you brought me up there. It was just once we were up there, you wanted to feed me," Buffy said, shrugging.

"I see," he said, looking rather confused. "So we stopped to eat. Then what?"

"Well, Edna came out, seeing it was you. She was so excited, she hadn't seen you in years and..."

"Edna is my friend?"

"Yes. You knew her for a long time. You helped her with her...business, I believe."

"Go on," William said.

"So, Edna sees you and she's cooing, 'Master Worthington this, and Master Worthington that.' Anyway, she insists on feeding us, and she takes us into the kitchen and has us wait there, while she sets up this little room with it's own table, chairs, place settings, candles, you name it. That's where we have Valentine's Day dinner. In our own little private dining room."

"Sounds nice...and romantic," he added, sadly.

"It was. I said you didn't mean to take me away for a romantic dinner or even romantic weekend, but I didn't say that it didn't turn out that way. It very much did," Buffy said, and kissed him softly, her tongue gently probing his mouth.

"What does that have to do with the necklace?" William asked, reluctantly breaking off the kiss.

"Oh, sorry. Duh! The restaurant is on the first floor, but on the second floor, there are antiques for sale. When we were done with dinner, I went upstairs to use the bathroom, and while you were waiting downstairs, you found another little room with antiques, and from what Edna tells me, you just gravitated to this necklace. You bought it for me without my knowing it. And when I was upstairs, I found a very old copy of The Complete Works of William Shakespeare, and bought it for you. So that's the story. We each secretly bought each other a gift that night."

"When did I give it to you?"

"Later on that night. We'd each changed into our pajamas, and when I came out of my bedroom, you had a fire going in the fireplace. We were sitting on the couch and that's when you gave it to me."

"And you gave me the book?" he asked.

Buffy nodded.

"Is it...I mean, do you still have it, by any chance?"

"The Shakespeare book?"

William nodded.

"Of course, I would have never..."

"I'm glad..."

"Of course, you do have that book of Shakespeare's comedies from Dawn," she reminded him.

"I know, but it's not the same...it's not from you."

"I know," she said, knowing why Spike had always worn his heart on his sleeve. It was William's.

Buffy looked at him, kneeling in front of her, her hands in his, as his mind mulled over the story.

"Elizabeth? You said that you'd come out of your bedroom. Did you mean you had your own? We weren't...lovers?"

"We had been. The year before, but then...things happened and we weren't. You, I mean we...had some growing to do, I guess is the best way to describe it. We hadn't been together that way, until that weekend. So yes, it did start out with us each having our own bedroom. You had yours and I had the guest bedroom."

"What happened...then?"

"You mean...?"

William nodded, looking at her intensely.

"I came...to your bed," she said, looking down for a moment. When she looked up, she had tears in her eyes.

"Why? What changed?" he asked gently, squeezing her hands, waiting for her to continue.

A small sound caught in her throat. How could she possibly answer that for him? The world had changed, Spike had changed; she had changed.

"I fell in love with you," she said, in a small voice. The simple truth of it, reliving the story hit her squarely where she lived. It had been the best weekend of her life.

God, he'd never loved anything or anyone more than he did her, at this moment.

Gentle as spring, he rained down kisses on her eyelids, her lips, he neck, as he rose to his feet, and crawled onto the bed, pulling her, to hug her tightly to him.

"Thank you," he whispered.

"For what?"

"For the story," he said, "it felt good to hear a real story…about me. Made it more real; my past life, you know? Makes me...I don't know if happy is the right word, but it makes me rather glad now, certainly less apprehensive, that we're going back home, because now there's a wonderful connection to it. "

"Oh, William," she said, reaching out to touch his face, "I was going to tell you about the necklace sooner. I’m so sorry that I didn’t until now…that I haven’t told you…more."

"Shhh," he said, running his hands up her sides, "s’right, Elizabeth. Know you’ve just been trying to do right by me. Probably didn’t know what to even make of me, when you found me like I was, in the hospital and all that…didn’t rightly know what to make of myself, sometimes I still don’t…"

"I do," she said, firmly, "you're a good man, William!"

"Am I?" he asked, then added, mischievously, "how good?"

"I'll show you," she said, kissing his warm lips, as her hands caressed him,

And she did.

END CHAPTER 68

William and Buffy awoke to the sounds of the Xander yelling, "Be quite Alex, others are still sleeping."

"Think someone should tell him that yelling to 'be quiet' is as bad as the 'original' yelling?" Buffy asked.

William snickered, then pulled her closer to him, "Go back to sleep, we don't have to be up for another half hour or so."

Angela came into the RV quietly and turned on the coffeepot. Ann was cooing happily on her mother's hip, as she warmed her bottle in the microwave.

"Morning," Dawn said, sitting up.

"Hi Dawn, sleep well?"

"Yeah, I went right out. How 'bout you guys?"

"Slept great. Even this one slept through the night. Sometimes she doesn't when we're away from home. Guess all that fresh air tired her out."

"Where's Xander?"

"Him and Alex are taking down the tent. I should go help, but I figured I'd better get Ann her bottle before she got cranky right in the middle of things."

"I'll feed her if you want to help him. Just let me go to the bathroom first."

"Thanks, Dawn."

Willow stretched and yawned, "Morning,"

"Hey Willow," Angela said, "how was your night."

"Fine, thanks. Do you want me to start some breakfast while you're helping Xander?"

"Oh, that would be great, Willow. Thanks. We still have plenty of eggs. There's also some pancake mix, some turkey bacon, sausage, juice, cereal. Whatever you feel like making."

"I'll think of something, I'm sure."

"Good. Coffee's done, so help yourself. I'm just going to get a cup for Xander and me and get a juice box for Alex, then I'll be out of your hair. Or at least out of the 'kitchen' in any case," Angela said, laughing at her own joke.

Dawn came out of the bathroom, her long tresses, perfectly combed, looking like the beautiful young woman she was.

"Okay Dawn, here she is, just let her have as much of the bottle as she wants. She'll have some food later, but she still always wants her ba-ba, first thing."

"Aunt Dawn's going to hold you for a while, Ann," Angela said, handing her off.

Ann went easily to Dawn. She was by far, her favorite 'aunt,' on the trip so far.

"How's an omelet sound?" Willow asked Dawn.

"Sounds great."

"Think we ought to wake Buffy and William?" she asked, as she started to scramble the eggs.

"I'll do it," Dawn said, smiling.

"Be nice!" Willow warned.

"What? Me? I'm always nice," she said, laughing.

"Come on Ann, let's you and me wake up Buh and W'um," she said, using the names that Buffy had told her that Ann had tried to say.

Dawn knocked at the door.

"Yes?" William answered.

"You guys decent?" Dawn asked.

"Um, hold on."

Dawn could hear the rustling of bedcovers and clothes.

"Okay," William called.

Dawn opened the door, smiling. Ann saw them and cooed happily, "Buh!"

"Hi, Pumpkin," Buffy said, smiling.

"Pumpkin?" Dawn asked.

"Buffy shrugged, "Looks like a little pumpkin to me."

Dawn put Ann down by the foot of the bed and Ann crawled up between Buffy and William.

She sat down between them, looking at one then the other. She turned toward William, "W'um!" she said, then laughed an infectious baby laugh.

They laughed, too.

"That's me, "W'um," he said.

"W'um, ba-ba!"

William looked at Buffy, then at Dawn helplessly.

"She wants you to give her a bottle."

"Oh," he said, understanding.

Dawn handed it to him.

"W'um, ba-ba!" Ann repeated.

"You want W'um to drink the ba-ba?" he asked, pretending to drink from it.

Buffy watched as Ann went from not being sure if she should cry or laugh. So many emotions on that little face. She chose laughter.

William laughed along, pretending to drink from the bottle, making all sorts of silly, slurpy noises, "Um, yum-yum-yum, mmmm good ba-ba, yum..."

Finally, he handed it to her and she helped herself, still keeping a bemused eye on him, all the while holding onto Buffy's fingers as she leaned on her, facing him.

Buffy ran her fingers through her soft, blonde locks with her other hand, while William still made pretend slurping noises at her.

Buffy looked over at Dawn, who had been staring at them with something like awe. Buffy caught her eye and gave Dawn a, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch!" look.

If William had still been Spike, he surely would have heard her heartbeat increase, when she realized what it was that Dawn was smiling at. She didn't know why, but all of a sudden the whole scene made her want to bolt.

She would not, could not, wish for this whole scene, as if it might possibly be hers someday. It was just too much! Too much had happened...might still happen or, might not happen. Too many what ifs in her and William's life. She would not hope for things that she knew, would more than likely, never be hers. Or his.

She disentangled herself from Ann's tiny fingers, announcing, "I have to use the bathroom," and brushed past Dawn, with a sideways glance.

William, totally entranced and bewitched by this small girl's attention, seemed to have not noticed Buffy's discomfort at all.

Dawn sat down on the edge of the bed and Ann crawled over to her.

"She's adorable!" William exclaimed, as if just coming to a sudden revelation.

"She sure is," Dawn said, playing a game of baby-rap with Ann. She would tap her on her mouth, all the while Ann would make a noise, hence, coming out like baby-rap, ‘wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.’

"It would be nice someday, wouldn't it?" Dawn asked William.

"What?"

Dawn motioned to Ann with her eyes.

"Oh, yes, it would be," he said, smiling brightly for a moment, then shook his head adding, "I don't think Elizabeth has any such ideas, however."

"She's afraid to…afraid of lots of things," Dawn said, just barely refraining herself from saying, ‘afraid to lose someone she loves again.’

"I know," William said, remembering Elizabeth taking off from Fullers’ at the mention of marriage.

Dawn nodded, feeling sorry for bringing the whole thing up. She rose with Ann to go. As she got to the door, she turned to him.

"Promise me something, William?"

"What's that?"

"Don't give up on her."

"Never. I never will," he said softly.

Dawn smiled then turned to leave.

"Dawn?"

She turned around.

"Thank you for your friendship."

She smiled at him and winked, then made her way out.

William sighed. So far, it had been a peculiar way to start the morning.

As they did the morning before, they ate on the road. Xander included, this time, from his seat behind the wheel.

William had decided to just have coffee, but Elizabeth insisted that he have some fruit and toast, and, if he felt the slightest twinge, he was to take at least half a Dramamine.

Luckily, neither his, nor Alex's stomach seemed to bother them that morning.

They stopped for gas once, before heading through the rest of the state and on to Kansas, where, after getting past Kansas City, they would take their afternoon 'siesta.'

Buffy sat alone in one of the chairs, looking out as the plains rolled by. William sat across from her on the couch, studying her face. She’d quiet since earlier that morning, after Dawn had ‘invaded’ their bedroom.

William sat on the couch across from her, playing with Alex and Ann, looking over at her and smiling sheepishly, once in a while. He almost felt guilty having this good of time with the kids, like it was something that she was being excluded from.

"Wanna join in the fun?" he asked her.

She shook her head, "Not now."

"Okay," he replied.

Ann toddled off to go sit on Xander’s lap, who had been given a break from driving by Angela, while Alex stayed with William.

William was going over numbers with Alex, when all of a sudden Alex said, "You’re a vampire!"

Time froze and everyone with it, until the only sound that could be heard was the road beneath them. Everyone that is, except, the baby, William, and Alex.

"Alex!" Xander said, almost desperately. He had this ready to pounce look on his face, as if any minute William was about to ‘eat’ his son. He handed Ann to Willow and stood up.

"What do you mean, I’m a vampire?" William asked, innocently.

"The Count," Alex said.

"The Count?"

"Um-hmm."

The Count? As in Dracula, Buffy thought? Was this kid channeling, or what? She saw Xander rise and stood up, too, ready to stop him from assaulting William, if necessary.

"The Count!" Alex insisted. "You know! On Sesame Street. The Count. Von, twooo, tdree, four, five," Alex called out, then laughed a very ‘Count-like’ laugh, "ah-ha-ha-ha."

Dawn broke the silence, laughing. Buffy turned to her, glowering, then both Xander and Buffy looked at each other and sat down, hearts pounding.

Dawn ignored her and said to William, "It’s a children’s show on Public Television. The Count is a…well, a counting vampire, von, twooo, tdree… You were counting."

"Oh," William said, still not quite getting it, except for the numbers.

"So, should I count that way, too Alex?"

Alex giggled, nodding.

"Okay, let’s see," William said, clearing his throat, "Von, twoo, tdree, four, five…" he counted in a funny voice, then put his hands up, as if he were a ‘scary’ counting vampire.

Alex screamed in mock horror, all the while falling over laughing, when the ‘monster’s’ hands became tickling ones instead.

Buffy got up and went into the bedroom and closed the door. Dawn followed a minute later.

"Buffy? You okay?"

"Yeah, sure Dawn, just peachy-keen! How do you think I am?" she asked, through clenched teeth.

"Come on Buffy, it was just a little innocent thing. Nobody is the worse for it."

"No? No? Did you see what happened in there? And it wasn’t only Xander’s reaction; it was all of ours. Nobody is ever going to forget, ever. Until one day…"

"He finds out?"

Buffy nodded.

"You could tell him."

"I can’t. Not now. And even if I did, I wouldn’t know how to start. What do I say, ‘Oh by the way William, you used to be a vampire and enjoyed killing people? You were the Big Bad?’ That would go well!"

"You have to one day."

"Not now!" Buffy said, turning to Dawn. "Please don’t do what you did again this morning. Can’t you see how…? There’s too many unknowns," she said, shaking her head sadly.

"Buffy, look, I’m sorry about that, I didn’t mean to put any kind of pressure on you, it was just cute to see you guys like that, that’s all. Stop freaking out, okay? And the thing out there," Dawn said, motioning, "it was just a little bump in the road."

Buffy stared at her.

"Okay, it was a little jolt in the road, but nothing that hasn’t already been forgotten. Out of the mouth’s of babes, huh?"

Buffy nodded, "Did you see Xander?" she shuddered.

"Yeah, though I was going to have to deck him one, myself. I don’t know what he thought there for a minute."

"I do, he thought that somehow Alex could see Spike," Buffy said, "it’s what we all thought."

Dawn was quiet for a minute, "I know, but it wasn’t that at all. William was counting, The Count, counts, and Alex watches Sesame Street. That was what Alex was relating to! Nothing to do with Spike, what-so-ever."

"I know."

"William really loves you, probably as much as Spike did," Dawn said.

"I know. Why did you just mention that?"

"Just thought it wouldn’t hurt to remind you that other people see what you only hope is true," Dawn said.

Buffy looked at her shocked, "I don’t just hope, I know…"

Dawn shook her head, "No, you don’t, Buffy. You really don’t ‘know’ it, not like you should."

"Then I guess I don’t know what that means, because I do know that William loves me."

She was going to say something else to Dawn, to defend herself, but there was a knock on the door.

"Hey guys, we’re stopping for lunch soon," Xander’s said.

"Okay," still looking at Dawn.

Dawn opened the door and Xander stuck his head in, "Can I talk to Buffy alone for a minute Dawn?"

"Sure," Dawn answered, slipping past Xander.

Xander came into the bedroom and closed the door, looking uncomfortable.

"I’m sorry about that, out there, Buffy.

"I know."

"I was just shocked when Alex said that. I didn’t even know he knew what a vampire was."

"Well, Xander, there’s lots of kids books with vampires, there’s Halloween, Sesame Street, old movies, cartoons, just to name a few things."

Having spent a semester taking Children’s Lit, plus working with children for the past couple of years, including her own class last year, she knew just how many stories about vampires there were, and how much children seemed to love them; the scarier, the better, too.

"I just didn’t know he knew…"

"He doesn’t," Buffy said, coolly, "he just knows that William was playing with him." She lowered her voice, "William the kind-hearted man sitting out there, not Spike. And to tell you the truth, I don’t even think pre-chipped Spike ate children."

Xander looked at her, "You may be right, but he’s my kid, and if you were a parent, you’d feel the same way," he said, instantly regretting the words.

"I’m sorry Buffy, I didn’t mean that. I just overreacted, okay? No harm. I’ve tried to protect my family from all that’s in the past. I don’t want them to have to worry about monsters."

She looked at Xander and nodded. They all carried the scars of the past with them. Xander only had to look in the mirror everyday to see his. A huge scar on her psyche was sitting in the other room, back from the dead.

They felt the RV come to a stop.

"Forgiven," Buffy said. She couldn’t say forgotten, because none of them ever forgot.

Xander nodded, "Good. Let’s have some lunch."

After lunch, Xander and his family lay down for a rest, as they had yesterday, but Buffy had other ideas. Instead of pulling off into yet another faceless, nameless rest area, Angela, had pulled off the highway, past Topeka, Kansas, into a park/RV/rest area, that just happened to be directly across the road from a shopping mall.

That decision of Angela’s had brought wide smiles from Buffy, Dawn, and Willow. It also brought a groan from Xander, who could see that the near future, clearly, would take a bit longer to arrive at. Lastly, it brought a shake of the head from William, who was clearly more aligned in Xander’s court, even if he was fascinated by the array of wares he had seen in the Wal-Mart in Niles, MI.

Buffy decided to go and look at some clothes and shoes. Willow wanted to check out the mall’s Radio Shack for a computer cable and more memory. Dawn thought that she should run into Toys R Us and buy something for Alex and Ann, now that they’d gotten to know them and what their levels of interests were.

That left William. Dawn suggested that he go with. He readily agreed, not wanting to be forced, er, coerced, into possibly trying on clothes or some other such thing, that Elizabeth had suggested.

Buffy and Dawn had held onto William’s arm, with Willow behind, as they’d practically forced him to cross the busy highway with them, to the mall’s parking lot. Angela promised to bring the RV over to that side after their naps, so that the four of them didn’t have to back over, and so she could do a bit of looking around the mall herself.

After agreeing that they should all meet at Baskin Robbins in an hour, Buffy and Willow left Dawn and William across the parking lot at the Toys R Us, while they went into the mall proper.

Buffy decided to go with Willow to Radio Shack, then have Willow accompany her to where she wanted to go. She figured it might be the only time alone she’d have with Willow for the duration of the trip, except for a minute or two here and there.

Willow had been pleased that Buffy decided to come with her.

"Are you sure?" she’d asked.

"Well, it’s not like I haven’t been inside a Radio Shack before. I even have my own laptop at home and everything," she’d replied, smiling.

"I know, I didn’t mean that you didn’t have any knowledge of computers, Buffy," Willow said, chagrined that maybe she’d taken it the wrong way. Well, maybe she did partially mean it. It was hard to realize that Buffy had been living and maintaining her own household, working, and had graduated from college in the past 5 years.

"I’m teasing, Willow. I just wanted to hang with you," Buffy said, putting her arm around Willow’s shoulders.

"I’m glad you did!" Willow said, smiling at her.

Dawn watched as William got his first eyeful of the toy mega-store.

"My God!"

Dawn grinned, "Pretty big, huh?"

William shook his head, "Not big, enormous!"

"Santa shops here in this country."

"I can well imagine."

They walked down the first aisle, slowly, William looking in amazement at all the games, party favors, books.

Dawn stopped at the video game console and showed him how to play. They were only shorter versions of the real games, but William had fun trying to play anyway.

Next, they looked in the many toy aisles for children between Ann and Alex’s ages. Dawn spotted the Sesame Street section and showed them to William.

"That’s The Count," she told him, holding up a plush doll.

William laughed, "Pretty silly looking."

Dawn also showed him a couple of videos, a book, and a sticker book, all featuring The Count.

They decided on the a book called The Count Counts Scary Things, A Count Sticker book called, Boo. They also chose two videos, one called Learning to Count, featuring The Count, and another called, Count Duckula, The Great Ducktective, featuring Donald Duck. And of course, they just had to get The Count in plush.

For Ann, they chose a cute little blonde baby doll. To go along with it, they also got a set with things a ‘little mommy’ would need, such as pretend diaper bag, baby bottles, bib, cup, spoon, dish, baby powder, rattle, etc. They also got her a plush kitty.

Before they’d decided on the kitty, William had picked up a pig and showed it to Dawn.

"Wow, that almost reminds me of Mr. Gordo," she said, except for the little white ‘spikey’ hair on top. That reminds me of what your hair used to look like sometimes," she teased.

"Who’s Mr. Gordo?"

Dawn told him of the pig that Buffy had since she’d been little. It had been given to her by a favorite uncle, Gordon, hence, the name.

"It got demolished, along with everything else in Sunnydale, though," she’d said.

"Oh," he said, holding the pig. "Do you think…? Oh, nevermind."

"What?"

"Well, I was going to ask you if you thought that we or I should buy it for Elizabeth?"

"That’s a good idea!" Dawn agreed.

"You don’t think that it would…I don’t know, make her sad, do you?"

"I don’t think so. I think she’d think it was very thoughtful of you."

William smiled, "Okay, then, I’ll get it."

"But I think we have to rename him."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he sort of looks like Mr. Gordo, but he also has hair like you did, so…how about Mr. Spordo?"

"Mr. Spordo?"

"Yeah, it’s a combination of Mr. Gordo and Spike."

He laughed, "I’m telling her you named him!"

Dawn giggled, "I wouldn’t expect anything less," she said, playfully punching him in the arm.

Buffy and Willow had gone into some department stores, where they’d each hit the summer sale racks and gotten a few new tops. Then they’d hit the shoe department, and each found a pair of sandals on clearance, as well. The last stop Buffy had made was in the men’s department. She’d bought William a couple more T-shirts, a polo shirt, another pair of blue jeans, a blue jean jacket, a cap, and a pair of sunglasses.

Dawn and William were sitting at a table already in the food court, when Buffy and Willow walked up.

"Hey," Buffy said, putting her hand on William’s shoulder.

"Hi," he said, smiling at her and stood up to pull out a chair for her and Willow.

"Did you guys have ice cream, yet?" Buffy asked.

"No, we were waiting for you guys. Xander, Angela, and the kids ought to be along soon, too."

"There they are," Willow said, pointing.

"See you guys have been busy!" Xander said.

"Um-hmm," Buffy said, grinning at all the bags around the table.

They took turns getting up for ice cream, so as to not lose the table.

Angela looked down at the Toys R Us bags, "You didn’t have to buy the kids anything," she said, "they’ve got tons!"

"I know, but we wanted to," Dawn said, patting Angela on the hand. "Wait till the kids see what we got them, they’ll love them!"

"Thank you guys," Angela said.

"How did you like Toys R Us?" Buffy asked William, who was licking a Rocky Road ice cream cone.

He looked up with something like awe, "It was amazing!"

She laughed, "Thought you’d think so. How’s your cone?"

"Good," he answered, "but not as good as at Fuller’s."

She smiled at him.

Buffy and Willow showed the rest of the gang what they’d purchased, except for the things for William. She knew he’d be embarrassed. She’d give him those things later.

William and Dawn had also decided that giving the kids toys now wouldn’t be as great an idea, as back at the RV, once they got on the road. William also wasn’t about to give ‘Mr. Spordo,’ to Elizabeth until later.

Xander said, while Angela shopped, he’d take Alex to the little video arcade in the mall, but he didn’t think there would be anything for Ann to do. Angela said she’d take Ann, despite offers by everyone else to take her. Willow decided to go along with Xander, Dawn decided to go shopping by herself for a while, leaving William and Elizabeth.

"What do you want to do?" Buffy asked.

"I have no idea," William answered, shrugging.

"I have an idea," Dawn said, "there was an Eyeglass Emporium when William and I walked in. Doesn’t he need some glasses?"

William shook his head, "No, that’s alright. I’ve got those ones from Wal-Mart."

"But that’s not your own prescription," Dawn said.

"That is a good idea," Buffy agreed, "but how long would it take?"

"Don’t they advertise in about an hour?" Dawn asked.

"Maybe if you already have your prescription, but he’d have to be seen by a doctor first, pick out a pair of glasses, then wait."

William was shaking his head.

"Sorry to break the vote here, but we do have to get back on the road. I didn’t even want to stop here, but Angela did."

William nodded his head toward Xander.

"Well, we’re going to be here another hour at least, aren’t we?" Buffy asked, looking at Angela.

"I’d say, at least an hour," she said, grinning.

Xander groaned, "Do you know how much farther we still have to go? Almost to the other end of the state, Angela!"

"Look, mom and dad aren’t going anywhere. We don’t have to pitch a tent tonight or even worry about food. It’s only a little after noon now, and even if we left at, say 1:30, we’d probably still be there by 6:30 at the latest."

Xander sighed. He knew winning an argument with her was an exercise in futility.

"Fine, just make sure everybody is back here by 1:30pm, sharp!"

"Why don’t we just all meet out at the RV by 1:30, instead?" Angela suggested. "That way, if you and Alex get tired or if we do, we can just go back there. It’s outside of Sears," she said, to the rest of them.

They agreed, and William reluctantly let Elizabeth take him to look at glasses.

William had his and Dawn’s bags, but insisted on carrying Elizabeth’s too, despite her protests that she could carry her own. Finally, she gave in, "I should take you with more often," she said grinning, and taking his arm.

He groaned.

"Hey, you’re beginning to sound just like Xander!"

William grinned at her, not really minding. He was glad to have her arm through his and she seemed happier than she had since that morning. Must be the buying of things that had brightened her mood.

The got to the eyeglass place and walked in. Again, he was overwhelmed with so many choices.

"Have you ever had an eye exam?" she asked him.

"I…I think so, "he said, remembering back to what seemed to be an old doctor looking into his eyes with a bright light.

She directed William over to the glasses, while she talked to the person at the counter. They said that William could have his eyes examined in about 10 minutes, and that the exam should only take about 20, that gave them an hour to get them back. She’d even suggested to Buffy, that they could get the exam here, pay for the glasses, then have them shipped to another store out-of-state, where they could pick them up and have them fitted.

"We’ll see how we’re running on time," Buffy said.

"Do you have his insurance card?" the lady asked.

"Um, no, we’ll be paying cash," Buffy said quickly.

"Name?"

"Name?"

"Yes, his name."

She thought quickly. Should she give his real name? Was there any harm? If she gave it, she could have Willow ‘erase’ it, but wouldn’t that be an abuse of power? Should she give a phony name? What would William make of that?

"William Worth," she said, stopping short. Well, half-truthful, anyway.

"We’ll call him in about 10 minutes."

"Okay," she replied and went over to see what William had picked out.

There was a nice looking brunette woman talking to William and showing him glasses. She had on a short skirt and a low-cut, almost see through top. By the way she was joking with him, Buffy could tell she was flirting.

"Here William, let’s try these ones," she said, her voice sugarcoated, as she took one pair off his face and replaced them with another. "Those look very nice and they make you look quite handsome."

Buffy had seen and heard enough.

"Excuse me," she said, rather coldly to the woman who was practically drooling on William.

"Yes?" the woman asked, in a rather irritated voice, "I’m sorry, but if you’re needing help, you’ll have to wait, I’m with this gentleman right now."

"Really? Because as far as I know, I’M the one with this gentleman!"

"What?" the woman asked, confused, "you don’t work here!"

"And I’m the blonde one? I am with this man, I am with William, I am William’s… " she turned to look at him. What exactly was she to him? Although she'd told everyone concerned at The University of Chicago that she'd been his wife, and even gotten papers to prove it, but that had been an emergency. She'd also changed her name years before and let others think she was a widow. Yet, when William had mentioned marriage or when Dawn, not so subtly that morning, had put her in the mindset to think of herself and him as parents, she'd fled. It didn't seem fair to only 'pretend,' when it suited her. Which brought her back to the statement at hand: William's what? Girlfriend? Lover? Hootchy Mama?

"I am William's," she said simply.

His eyes hadn't left hers. He had grinned at her attempt to define what she was. To him, she was more than whatever she chose to define herself as; to him she was everything he'd ever wanted.

"She's mine," he said, not so much at the saleslady, but to Elizabeth.

"Oh, oh, oh…I’m sorry. I didn’t know what you meant. I was just helping him find some glasses," she stammered.

"Uh-huh. Well, I think I’ll just help him now, if that’s alright with you…what’s your name?" Buffy asked looking at her nametag. It said Lora Wylender. "I’ll just help him now, Ms. Wylender."

"Of course," she stammered, "if you have any questions…"

Buffy waved her off, not taking her eyes off of him.

He was still smiling at her and her apparent jealousy over Ms. Wylender.

"Oh, what are you grinning at?" she asked him, making a face at him and plopping a pair of glasses onto his nose.

A few minutes later, the receptionist called, "William Worth!"

"That’s you," Elizabeth said, then shrugging, "Um, I started to give her your name, but she got interrupted before I could finish, so she just took it down as Worth, instead of Worthington."

"Should I tell her?" he asked.

"It’s up to you," she said, trying not to make a big deal of it, "they won’t see us again, so it really doesn’t matter one way or the other."

He shrugged, and just decided to let them think that was his name. Sometimes, he got the feeling that, not only didn’t he really know who he was, but that Elizabeth didn’t want anyone to know who he was, either. Hadn’t she asked him, practically pleaded with him to not tell anyone the name of the town they lived at in California? Was there a reason to hide where he was? Who he was? Had he done something bad?

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief, when he didn’t question the name game. She’d felt pretty good about that little story she’d quickly come up with.

An hour later, William had a new pair of oval glasses, rimmed in a soft, brushed pewter color that, while not Buffy’s first choice, did look alright with his light brown hair.

They saw Dawn coming from the opposite direction and all hurried out to the RV.

Everyone else was already there.

"You guys been waiting long?" Buffy asked.

"No, just a few minutes. Okay, let’s roll!" Xander said, from behind the wheel.

They’d been driving for about 15 minutes, when Dawn decided it was time to give Alex and Ann their presents. Alex whooped when he saw the plush Count and hugged him to his chest. He went running up to the front to show Xander. Buffy came along, just to see his expression.

Xander laughed, seeing it, "If I didn’t know better, Buffy, I’d say Spike is laughing inside, but on the outside, I realize that it’s all innocent for William."

She reached over and gave him a kiss on the cheek and things were okay.

Ann was delighted both by the baby doll and its accessories. Indeed, she made a beeline for the ba-ba, giving it to ‘W’um’ several times. ‘W’um,’ was only too happy to play along, and even Buffy got into the moment, sitting on the floor and playing with the doll’s things along with Ann.

Alex got Angela to put in The Count’s video and William got to see what Sesame Street and The Count were all about. Next came the video Count Duckula.

Buffy smiled, watching Alex sitting on William’s lap, laughing at Donald Duck as ‘ Count Duckula, The Great Ducktective.’

The scenery rolled by pretty monotonously, but they passed the time amiably. Buffy, was glad to have had this time to get to know Angela, Alex, and Ann. She was terribly pleased that Xander had a wonderful family to call his own. Nice, normal, and charming in every way.

It was apparent that Xander and Angela loved each other very much, and the kids just added to their joy. To say that his childhood family had been dysfunctional, was one of the great understatements, but his adopting Willow and then, later Buffy as his surrogate family, had led him into a world he’d never imagined; one that he hadn’t been called to, but one he loyally refused to abandon. And he’d paid for that loyalty.

They were almost at their destination. Willow had driven for a while, even Dawn, although that made everyone a bit nervous, but she'd handled the behemoth admirably. Now Xander was back at the wheel for the final hour, before they arrived at Angela's grandmother's house. She was home from the hospital and doing a bit better. Angela's parents, Betty and Edward were there, tending to her. After Xander came back next week, after dropping off Dawn, Buffy, and William, her aunts would care for her grandmother.

"We must be getting real close," Xander said, pointing to a sign for Grinnell, "another 10-15 minutes or so. Think we'll see one more sign for Campus, then it's on to Oakley."

"As in Annie?" Buffy asked.

"Ann?"

"You know, Annie Oakley, western sharpshootin' gal."

"Oh...I don't know. Geez, look at that," he pointed to another sign.

"Angelus."

Xander shook his head, "Angelus, Kansas? That can't be good."

"No, not of the good, not at all," Buffy said, staring at the sign, which told drivers to take a north road to Angelus. "I'm sooo glad Angela's relatives aren't from there! Think I'd have to pass on that!"

"You and me, both, Buffy. You and me, both," Xander said, and they rode along in silence.

A bit unnerved, Buffy joined William on the couch, where he sat dozing, after a long afternoon. Everyone was pretty tired by this time, in fact.

She leaned up against him; legs curled up underneath her and shut her eyes for a moment.

He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Did I wake you?"

"M'not sleeping, just resting," he murmured.

"Almost there. Angela said her mom has dinner waiting for us."

"Umm...good," he answered sleepily.

She sighed, letting herself once more, be reassured by his touch, his presence, and most of all by the very warmth of him.

END CHAPTER 69

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