Over the next week there was a rash of demon activity that kept Buffy
hopping. She was falling behind in her studies due to the increased
demonic activity and she and Spike hadn't been able to be together
since the night before The Swarm hit town. It'd taken several days
for the garlic juice repellent to completely dissipate from Buffy's
skin and then her time had been taken up by demon slaying and
studying.

Now at last it was Friday night. Hoping to carve out some time for
themselves, Buffy and Spike had decided to split up patrol. With each
covering half of town, they figured they'd be able to have an hour or
so for themselves. Buffy hoped so. She'd gone a year without sex
after Riley left, but she was ready to climb the walls after just one
week of being denied Spike.

Walking past the Espresso Pump, she glanced in and stopped dead in
her tracks. Entering the café, she approached a table and asked
sternly, "What are you doing here?"

Dawn jumped and looked at her sister guiltily. "Just having a cup of
hot chocolate with Janice."

Buffy looked coldly at the two boys who were also at the table.
Looking back at her sister she said, "Let's go, Dawn."

Dawn started to protest but one look at her sister's angry face and
she gathered up her jacket and hurriedly said goodnight.

"Well, that certainly ruined my social life," she hissed furiously.
"It'll be all over school Monday that little Dawnie Summers' big
sister fetched her out of a coffee shop cause she was sitting with
*boys*."

"That isn't why and you know it," Buffy snapped. "The demons in this
town are running wild and you're not supposed to be out after dark.
Are you trying to get hurt or killed?"

"No," Dawn pouted. "I just wanted to have a little fun. You remember
fun, don't you, Buffy?"

"Barely," her sister answered dryly.

"Where's Spike?" Dawn asked suddenly. "I thought he always
accompanied you on patrol."

"We split up tonight hoping to finish patrol faster so we cou... I
mean, so I could go to bed early tonight."

"Oh. I guess it has been a rough week for you. You must really be
ready to hit the mattress."

"You have no idea."

As they walked up the street, Buffy slowed down as she saw someone
entering a restaurant halfway up the block.

"What is it?" Dawn inquired.

"You wait here, Dawn. That was that Warren creep. I'm just going to
check out what he's up to."

"Oh, come on, Buffy. He was probably just going to dinner. Let's go
home, okay?"

"Wait here." Hurrying up the street, Buffy entered the restaurant.
Telling the hostess that she was meeting someone, she slipped past
her and quickly spotted Warren. He was talking to a girl at the bar,
a girl who did not seem happy to see him. When the girl turned her
head slightly, Buffy realized that it was Warren's old girlfriend,
Katrina. As Buffy approached, Katrina gathered up her purse talking
as she stood up. "...looking at you makes me want to vomit."

"You sure about that?" Warren asked, slipping on a pair of red
sunglasses.

"I don't know, Warren, but I'd think the vomit line was a clue that
she's way sure, wouldn't you?" Buffy asked mockingly.

Warren jumped up and glared, "You!"

"Me."

"I know you, don't I?" Katrina asked.

"Yeah, we met at Warren's last Spring when his sexbot tried to kill
you."

"Oh, yeah. You aren't dating him now, are you?"

"Me? God no. Except for punching his face in, I wouldn't touch him
with a ten foot pole."

"Smart girl." Turning back to Warren, Katrina added, "Just stay away
from me, Warren, or I'm taking out a restraining order." With that
she sailed out of the bar.

"You bitch," Warren growled. "You think you've stopped me, but you
can just take Katrina's place." Opening his hand, he revealed a small
silver orb that flashed with red and gold sparkles. Within seconds,
Buffy was entranced.

Putting the device back in his pocket, Warren removed his sunglasses.
"Follow me, slave," he ordered.

"Yes, master."

***

Spike walked into his crypt. He'd managed to finish patrol even
sooner than he'd hoped and now had time to prepare the bedchamber for
Buffy's arrival. Lighting candles and pouring a glass of wine, he
removed his tee shirt and donned a red silk button down that he left
hanging open. The bed was turned down and soft music was playing from
his CD player. Spike reached down and rubbed at his already turgid
shaft. He hoped she arrived soon or he'd have to take the edge off.

***

Dawn watched in confusion as Buffy followed Warren into a black van.
There was something strange about the way her sister had been walking
and when the van pulled away with a squeal of tires, Dawn knew her
sister was in trouble. Running to the restaurant, she pulled some
coins from her pocket and made a quick call.

She was waiting anxiously outside the restaurant when a vehicle
pulled up at the curb. As Xander exited the vehicle, Dawn ran up to
him. "We have to find her, Xander. He did something to her. She'd
never have just left me here like this and gone off with him."

"Okay, Dawn," Xander soothed, "it's okay. We'll find her. Do you know
where Willow is? I tried calling the house but just got the answering
machine. I left a message."

"She and Tara were going to some girl's house for a wicca meeting or
something. I don't know where though."

"Okay, that makes it more difficult. We needed Willow to do a
location spell for us."

Dawn looked at Xander in concern as he furrowed his brow in thought.
Snapping his fingers he said, "Spike!"

"Spike?"

"When Buffy was invisible, he said he'd try to sniff her out. Maybe
he can follow her trail."

"He's out patrolling. Buffy said they split up so she could have an
early night."

"Well, we'll just have to try his crypt anyway. Maybe he's home now.
I hope so anyway."

Getting into the car, they sped off towards Spike's cemetery.

***

"This is a bad idea, Warren," Jonathan was saying in near panic.
"Buffy's the Slayer. She's going to kill us."

"She's our slave now, Frodo," Warren sneered. "The bitch isn't going
to do anything but serve our needs." Buffy was dressed in a French
Maid's outfit and stood stiffly in front of the three men holding a
bottle of champagne. Walking up to her, Warren ordered, "Serve us the
champagne, slave."

"Yes, master," Buffy said and obediently poured the wine. Jonathan
nervously sipped at his drink. He hoped when Buffy came to she didn't
punch him too hard.

***

Spike jumped when his front door burst open. Looking up in surprise
from his chair, he raised his eyebrows when Xander and Dawn rushed
into his crypt.

"What's wrong?"

"Spike, Buffy's in trouble. You have to find her before he does
something to her."

"What? Who, Niblet? Who's going to do something to Buffy?"

"Warren has Buffy," Xander explained, filling Spike in on the story.

"Wait here," Spike told them. Jumping down to the lower level, he
changed back into his tee shirt and picked up his duster. Rejoining
the others, he headed for the door. When Dawn started to follow,
Spike turned to her. "You stay here, Bit. Bar the door and don't let
anyone in unless it's one of us. There're weapons in that chest, so
protect yourself if you have to."

"We can't leave her here alone," Xander protested.

"And I'm not taking her anywhere near that bastard Warren. If he can
do something to Buffy to make her go with him, he can do something to
Dawn. We're not taking that chance. She'll be safer here."

Xander didn't like it but he reluctantly acquiesced.

When they reached Xander's car, Spike said, "I have an idea where he
might have taken her. If I'm right, we'll save a lot of time tracking
her."

"And if you're wrong?"

"Then I try to track her from the restaurant."

"And we've wasted precious time."

"Yeah, like we're going right now while you argue with me."

Xander scowled but started the car. "Where to?"

***

When Warren had finished his glass of champagne, he said, "Now the
fun begins. Come with me, slave."

"Wait a minute," Jonathan said nervously. "Where are you going with
her?"

"I told you," Warren sneered. "This bitch is going to serve us. And
right now she's going to service me."

"You can't do that," Jonathan protested.

"You going to try and stop me?" Warren asked, a dangerous edge to his
voice.

Jonathan swallowed and backed down. He hated himself for his
cowardice, but Warren was really scaring him. Andrew had watched the
whole exchange in wide-eyed silence.

As Warren led Buffy into the back room and closed the door, Jonathan
felt like he was going to throw up.

***

Spike and Xander arrived at Warren's house to find a black van parked
in the driveway. "She's here," Spike growled.

***

Warren stood with his back braced against a wall and looked down with
contempt at a kneeling Buffy. "You know what I want you to do, bitch.
Now get to it."

"Yes, Warren."

"What? What did you say?"

Buffy sat back on her heels, a confused look crossing her face.

***

Getting out of the vehicle, Xander had to race after the rapidly
moving vampire. "Hey, Spike. This is a house. You can't go in without
an invitation, remember?"

"Already been invited." Following Buffy's scent he headed around to
the rear of the house. Lifting a foot, he smashed open the basement
door.

Andrew and Jonathan jumped and watched as a vampire in full game face
and a pissed-off carpenter raced down the stairs. Without even
looking at them, Spike headed directly to a closed door at the back
of the room with Xander following closely on his heels. Spike kicked
in that door also and the two men entered. Jonathan and Andrew stood
frozen as they heard a horrible growl from the vampire, a cry of
fright and pain from Warren, a scream of anguish from Spike and then
the sounds of fists meeting flesh and more cries of pain. When at
last things quieted down, they eased over to look inside the room.

Spike was kneeling on the floor hunched over, holding his head as if
in terrific pain. Buffy was kneeling beside him, holding his
shoulders and talking softly to him. Xander was standing over a
thoroughly thrashed Warren occasionally kicking him in the ribs as he
watched Buffy and Spike.

Finally Spike rose to his feet with Buffy's help. Her arm around his
waist in support, he stood looking over at Warren's crumpled form.
"I'm not sorry I tried to kill him."

"I know, Spike," she said softly. "Let's go."

As the three headed towards the door, Buffy suddenly halted and then
went to where Warren lay. Searching through his pockets she pulled
out the orb, laid it on the floor and stabbed the heel of her shoe
into it smashing it to pieces. Returning to Spike's side they exited
the room. The two boys stood together in fear awaiting the Slayer's
retribution.

"Where are my clothes?" she asked grimly.

They heard another growl issuing from Spike's throat and hurriedly
retrieved Buffy's garments. Buffy looked around at all the computers,
texts, equipment and computer disks and printouts.

"You boys look like you've been busy. I think it's time you found
something else to do with your time. Xander, Spike, gather up the
books, disks and printouts. Then help me." As the two men did as
she'd ordered, Buffy began to systematically smash every piece of
equipment she saw. Andrew cried out in protest when she picked up his
didgeridoo-like device.

"This important to you?"

Andrew nodded nervously.

Buffy looked at the instrument in her hand and then used it as a club
to smash all of Jonathan's vials and jars. When she had finished, she
broke it over her knee, threw the pieces on the ground and dusted off
her hands.

"Now it's not," she said calmly.

Warren stood leaning in the doorway of the back room holding his hand
against his ribs. His face was a bloody mess and there was a wound in
his neck from an obvious vampire bite. He glared his hatred at the
Slayer as she and her two friends destroyed all his hard work.

When they'd finished, Buffy turned to look coldly at him. "Leave
town, Warren."

"Fuck you, Slayer."

Spike growled and lunged at him, but Buffy stopped him. "Don't,
Spike, he's not worth the pain."

"Buffy's right, Spike," Xander said calmly. Walking up to Warren, he
punched him in the face again sending him to the floor. "Fortunately,
it doesn't hurt me."

Picking up the boxes of items they'd confiscated, the three walked
out.

They stopped by Spike's crypt to pick up Dawn.  Spike opted to stay
behind rather than go with them to Buffy's house.  He'd been
unusually quiet since they left Warren's hideout.  Buffy was
concerned but had no option but to return to the house with Dawn and
Xander.

Willow and Tara were just getting home as they drove up.  They looked
at Buffy's outfit with shock and then listened wide-eyed as they were
filled in on the evening's happenings.

"But you're okay, Buffy?" Willow asked with concern. 

Buffy nodded.  She had changed out of the maid's outfit and back into
her own clothes.  "I was just starting to come out of the trance or
whatever it was when Spike and Xander broke in.  He hadn't managed to
get me to do anything yet, but it was close."  Buffy shuddered.  
"It's a good thing you guys showed up when you did, Xan," Buffy
added.  "I don't know what Warren would have done once he realized I
was coming to.  I don't think he would have wanted me to regain
control over myself."

"All in a day's work, Buff," Xander smiled. 

Buffy smiled back at him.  They were sorting through the material
they'd taken from Warren's house.  Buffy looked at the mess and then
stood up.  "Look, guys, I hate to leave you with this, but I really
need to go talk to Spike."

"Buffy," Xander said haltingly, "I know he bit Warren and all, but it
was extenuating circumstances.  Go easy on the guy, okay?"

"Yeah, I will, Xander," Buffy smiled gently.  "Don't wait up, okay,
Dawn?  This talk may take awhile."

"Buffy," Dawn said worriedly.

"It'll be okay, Dawnie, I promise."

She walked into Spike's crypt to find him slumped in his chair
staring straight ahead at nothing, a bottle of whiskey hanging
loosely from his fingers. 

"Come to stake me, Slayer?"

Buffy walked up to him and removed the bottle from his hand, setting
it on the floor.  "I don't usually stake my heroes, Spike."

Spike gave a mirthless laugh.  "Some hero.  I promise you I'll act
like a man and at the very first trial, I go for the jugular."

Buffy straddled his lap.  Putting her hands of either side of his
face, she titled his head up until he was looking into her eyes.

"You want to know a secret, Spike?  If the roles had been reversed,
I'd have gone for the jugular too."

Spike looked at her in surprise.  Buffy looked back at him tenderly. 
"I'm not saying it's okay for you to attack like that every time I'm
in danger from a human," she said with a small smile, "but coming
into that room, seeing what you saw, well I'll give you a little
leeway for being a bit upset."

Spike traced the side of her face.  "Did he hurt you, Buffy? Did
he..."

Buffy shook her head.  "No, you and Xander got there in time, Spike. 
Nothing happened except he made me put on that stupid maid's outfit."

Spike wrapped his arms around her and crushed her to him.  "Thank
God."  Burying his head in her neck, he groaned out, "I wanted to
kill him, Buffy.  I still want to kill him."

"I know, Spike."  She held him tightly for a long while until she
felt him begin to relax.

"Do you know what I want, Spike?"

"What, love?"

"I want you to take me downstairs and make me forget about everything
but you and me."

Spike pulled her to him for an urgent kiss.  Wiggling off his lap,
she took his hand and led him to the ladder to the lower level.  They
rapidly made the descent and then there was only kissing and touching
and the hurried removal of clothing.  They tumbled onto the bed
together, neither one willing to let loose of the other.  Buffy
needed him inside her, needed to join with him, needed to breathe him
in to wash away the stench of Warren Meers from her nostrils. 
Opening to him, she reached down and guided him to her.

Spike slid home and then went still.  They held each other tightly,
unmoving, feeling only the joining of their bodies.  When Spike at
last began to move, Buffy titled her head back to give him access to
her neck.  Spike found her pulse and ran his lips along the sensitive
skin.  They moved together slowly at first, mouths meeting, hands
sliding over skin until the forces began to build.  When they came,
Buffy felt cleansed.

***

Buffy spent the next day dividing her time between schoolwork and
shifting through the things taken from Warren's the night before. 
Most of it consisting of diagrams and schematics and what appeared to
be blueprints made no sense to her so she just tried to put it into
piles for Willow to look over later.  Late in the afternoon, she
finished an assignment she'd been working on for school and stood up
with a stretch.  Wandering into the living room where Tara and Willow
were reading through some of the confiscated material she said, "I
think I'm going to go over to Warren's house, see if he took my
advice and left town.  Then I'm going to do an early patrol.  All
this demon activity..."

"I don't think you'll have that problem anymore, Buffy," Willow
interrupted.  "Look at this."  She handed Buffy a loose-leaf binder. 
Buffy flipped through a few of the pages and then looked at Willow in
surprise. 

"This is a catalog of demons."

"Yep.  And since Tucker Wells was a demon summoner, I'm thinking the
talent runs in the family."

Buffy stared at her friend.  "You mean you think that the geeky
little kid in Warren's gang was summoning all the demons that have
been running me ragged this past week?"

"Positive.  Look, Buffy, here's an entry for The Swarm."

Buffy glanced down to where Willow was pointing and her eyes turned
frosty.  "He called that thing?  Called something that would put
everyone in such pain?"  Buffy stood stiffly and her fists clenched. 
"I had to wear garlic juice!  Spike couldn't stand to be around me
for days."  At the confused looks from her friends, she stammered
out, "Y-you know how much Spike bitches and complains.  It was really
hard to patrol with him like that."

The girls laughed then, accepting Buffy's explanation for her rather
odd statement.  Deciding that she'd best leave the house before she
said anything else incriminating, Buffy gathered a few weapons and
left.

When she reached Warren's house, the first thing she noticed was that
the van was gone.  Walking around to the rear of the house, she saw
that the broken door had been propped shut.  Peering in through a
small window, she could see nothing in the darkened cellar.

"Can I help you?"

Buffy swung around to face a woman whose looks left no doubt she was
Warren's mother.  "Uh, hi.  I was just looking for Warren."

"He's moved out," the woman said.  "I came home from bingo last night
and he and his friends were loading their things into Warren's van." 
Making a face she added, "And I must say those boys left me quite a
mess to clean up in that basement."  She shook her head, a look of
long-suffering on her face.  "I don't know why my son is so
inconsiderate.  It isn't the way his father and I raised him."

Buffy felt guilty since she was the one who'd made the mess.  "Uh, do
you know where Warren and the others went?"

"No, I'm sorry.  I'm sure he'll call me once he gets settled though."

"Okay, thanks.  It was nice meeting you."

"If I hear from Warren, do you want me to let him know you were here
to see him?"

"Sure.  Tell him Buffy was checking up on him."

As she walked back down the street, Buffy realized that she really
didn't have any pressing business to take care of.  A smile graced
her face as she turned towards a particular cemetery and a particular
vampire.

***

"So, Anya," Xander said to his girlfriend.  "I've been thinking about
what you said about Buffy."

Anya looked up from the order form she was completing.  "What did I
say about Buffy?"

"That she was lonely."

"I never said she was lonely."

"Well, you said she needed a boyfriend."

Anya sighed.  "No, Xander, what I actually said is that she needed to
have sex.  Must you put everything so delicately?"

"It's just my way, Ahn," he said dryly.  "Anyway, what I was getting
at is there's a guy on my crew, name of Richard.  Seems nice and I
think he and Buffy would hit it off, so I invited him to Buffy's
birthday party next Saturday."

"Is he an overly large man?"

"No, kind of medium."

Anya frowned.  "I'm not sure she'll like him then.  You know she
prefers men who are large and hulking."

"She dated Scott Hope in high school.  He wasn't large and hulking."

"True," Anya said with a shrug.  "I guess it won't hurt.  I just hope
he is a man who can fulfill her sexually.  Slayers are different from
regular women.  He will need to have great stamina and athletic
abilities."

"Okay, I think this conversation has just wandered into an area I'd
rather not go."

"You're such a child, Xander," Anya muttered as she returned to her
order form.

***

Buffy opened the door and entered to find Spike sitting in his chair,
reading a book.  As he'd done once before, as soon as he saw the
Slayer, he hid the book under the cushion of his chair.  This time,
Buffy wasn't going to let it pass. 

"What were you reading?"

"Nothing."

"It wasn't nothing, Spike.  You were reading a book and you hid it as
soon as I came in.  Now what was it?"  She was next to him by now and
reached down to grab the book.

"Hey, leave off.  It's none of your business, Slayer."  He grabbed at
her hand, but couldn't really do much.  The chip started giving him a
twinge as soon as he tried to push her hand away.  Grasping the book,
she pulled it out and looked at the title.  Opening the book, she
slowly turned the pages, stopping to read a little now and then.

"It's poetry."

"Yeah."

"You read poetry?"

"Yeah.  Now give it over."

She kept hold of the book, but sat down on the arm of his chair and
leaned into him.  His arm automatically slipped around her back. 
Still leafing through the book she said softly, "I like poetry too."

"You do?"

"Uh huh.  It's one of my favorite courses at school."

"I didn't know that."

Buffy handed the book back to him and said, "Read to me."

Spike took the book and placed it on the floor and then pulled Buffy
onto his lap.  She immediately curled into him, leaning her head on
his shoulder.  Wrapping his arms around her, he began to recite:

Stars, you are unfortunate, I pity you,
Beautiful as you are, shining in your glory,
Who guide seafaring men through stress and peril
And have no recompense from gods or mortals,
Love you do not, nor do you know what love is.
Hours that are aeons urgently conducting
Your figures in a dance through the vast heaven,
What journey have you ended in this moment,
Since lingering in the arms of my beloved
I lost all memory of you and midnight.

She was looking at him with soft eyes.  Tracing her fingers down the
side of her face, she said, "More."

Looking deeply into her eyes, his voice rich with meaning, he quoted:

In that book which is
My memory . . .
On the first page
That is the chapter when
I first met you
Appear the words . . .
Here begins a new life

He lowered his head then and took her lips.  She responded with all
the emotion she felt but could not express in words.  When the kiss
ended, Spike held her close and recited verse after verse of
beautiful poetry.  And when they made love, Buffy felt as if her
heart would burst from the tenderness she felt for this monster, this
man.

A/N:  The first poem Spike recited was Night Thoughts by Johann
Wolfgang von Goethe.  The second was La Vita Nuova by Dante Alighieri

Buffy stood in front of the mirror twisting this way and that
assuring herself that she looked her best.  She was excited about
tonight's party.  Her twenty-first birthday.  Not many Slayers made
it this far.  Even she had died when she was only sixteen.

The party was going to be small, just her friends and sister.  And
Spike.  She'd made sure that she'd invited Spike.  Taking one last
look at herself, she exited her bedroom and walked down the stairs to
join Willow, Tara and Dawn.  The house looked beautiful with flowers
and candles placed strategically around.  Trays of snacks stood ready
on the coffee and end tables, there were drinks aplenty in the
kitchen and music played on the stereo.

Buffy heard a car door slam and then Xander and Anya walked in. 
Xander grabbed her and gave her a big hug.  "Happy twenty-first,
Buff."

Buffy laughed and hugged her friend back.  "Thanks, Xander.  I
wouldn't have gotten here without you."

The two friends shared a grin and then Buffy said, "What do you guys
want to drink?"  They were walking to the kitchen when the doorbell
rang. 

"I'll get it," Xander said heading for the front door.

"Wonder who that is," Buffy said to Anya as she poured the young
woman a glass of wine.  "Everyone I know just walks in."  As if to
emphasize her point, just as Xander was entering the kitchen with a
strange young man, the back door opened and Spike entered carrying a
six-pack of beer.

"Happy birthday, Slayer.  Here, brought you a present," he said
handing the six-pack to her. 

"I don't drink beer, Spike," Buffy said dryly.

"Oh, right.  More for me then," he said with a smirk.  Buffy rolled
her eyes, handed him one of the beers and put the rest in the
refrigerator.  She turned her attention to the stranger as Xander
said, "Buffy, this is Richard.  I work with him.  Thought you two
might like to meet."

Buffy instantly stiffened.  Looking slightly embarrassed she held out
her hand, "Hello, Richard.  Nice to meet you."

"Hi.  Xander's told me a lot about you," he smiled.  He was a nice
looking young man of medium height and build with blond hair and blue
eyes.

"Bet he's not told you the best parts," Spike said with a smirk as he
popped a handful of Chex Mix into his mouth.

"Uh, what can I get you to drink, Richard," Buffy said quickly,
giving Spike a glare.

"Beer would be fine."

Buffy reached into the fridge and brought out a bottle of beer, being
careful that it didn't come from the six-pack Spike had brought. 
Spike noticed and raised a mocking eyebrow at her.  She turned her
back on him. 

"Come on into the living room, Richard," she said leading the way. 
She was aware that Spike was following close behind.  Oh god, this
was so not good.  Why on earth had Xander invited some strange guy to
her party?  Well the reason was obvious, of course.  It was a fix up;
something she so did not need, especially with Spike there watching
her every move.  She hoped he could keep his jealously in check.

The party went well though, with dancing and eating and talking and
lots of laughter, although the conversation had to be severely edited
due to Richard's presence.  So they talked of school and work and
movies, innocuous things that didn't have to be explained or covered
over.  Buffy rather liked not talking shop for once; she liked
pretending that she was just a normal girl celebrating her birthday
in a normal way.

Of course she was always aware that Spike was there sitting quietly
in the background, watching her.  And when she was dancing with
Richard she wished she were dancing with Spike.  And when Richard sat
beside her on the couch, she wished it were Spike.

At last it came time to open her presents.  She got a beautiful
sweater from Tara, a scarf from Richard, a stunning black leather
jacket from Dawn, and a portable hand-held massager from Willow. 
Buffy could only stare at the thing, especially when Willow kept
going on how, since it was battery operated, Buffy could use it
anywhere.  "We all know how tense you've been lately, Buffy.  I
thought this was the perfect way to help you relax.  It's got several
speed settings, so it should really help ease all those little achy
places."

Buffy flashed one quick look at Spike and wished she hadn't.  His
look of sardonic amusement complete with raised eyebrow made her
blush to her roots.

"Uh, thanks, Will," she stammered as she hurriedly shoved it back
into its box. 

"Okay, everyone," Xander said.  "We've saved the best for last." 

Buffy glanced over and saw Xander and Anya wheeling in a large
chest.  Eyes wide, Buffy stood up and walked to where they had
stopped in the middle of the room.

Buffy knelt down and opened the chest.  "Xander this is... Did you
guys make this?"

"Xander made it and I helped with the finishing," Anya said proudly.

"Holds everything a young woman needs, Buff," Xander said.  Then more
softly so Richard couldn't hear, "It'll hold all your basic weapons,
plus there's a shelf for holy water, crosses and other smaller, easy-
to-lose weapons."

Standing up again, Buffy hugged first Xander and then Anya.  "This is
amazing, guys, thank you."

"Time for ice cream and cake," Dawn called out cheerfully.  She stood
in the doorway holding a cake with twenty-one lit candles.  Room was
made on the coffee table for her to set it down and then Buffy closed
her eyes, made a wish and blew the candles out.  Cheers were given,
"Happy Birthday" was sung and Tara handed out dishes of ice cream
while Buffy cut the cake.

When everyone had been served, Buffy picked up a plate and went over
to where Spike was standing apart from the others.  "Want a piece of
birthday cake?"

Taking it from her, he laid it on the sideboard and said softly, "I'd
rather have a piece of birthday girl."  Buffy blushed, glanced over
to where the others were busy eating and talking and answered
softly, "Play your cards right, mister, and maybe I'll let you lick
the frosting later."

Spike's eyes flashed and a low growl rumbled from his chest. 
Grabbing her hand he pulled her out of the room and into the hall
away from prying eyes.  "Spike," Buffy warned.

"Shhh, Buffy.  Look, I have something for you, too."  Slipping his
hand into his duster pocket, he brought out a small wrapped package. 
Buffy took it with slightly shaking hands.

"Spike you didn't have to..."

"I wanted to, Buffy.  What kind of a bloke doesn't give his girl a
prezzie on her birthday?  Didn't steal it either.  Bought it with my
poker winnings."

Buffy unwrapped the package and opened up the small jeweler's box to
reveal a silver bracelet.  "Spike, it's beautiful," she breathed.

"Hoped you'd like it.  Thought about getting you gold, but in your
line of work, silver's better."

She smiled at him and removed the bracelet from the box.  Holding out
her wrist she said, "Put it on me?"

Spike swallowed and took the delicate chain from her.  Once he had
fastened the clasp, Buffy twisted her wrist watching the light
sparkle off the links.  Spike was observing her closely and when she
looked back up at him he gave her that sweet little boy smile only
she saw.  "So, you like it, yeah?"

"I love it, Spike."  Tugging on his lapel, she pulled him down for a
kiss.

"Buffy, we... Oh!"  Buffy and Spike broke apart and stared at a
shocked Tara.  "W-we were w-wondering if you wanted to play
c-charades?" Tara stuttered.

Buffy nodded wordlessly.  As Tara turned away, Buffy called out,
"Tara?"

"It's okay, Buffy, I won't, uh.  I'll tell the others you'll be right
there."

"Do you want me to go, pet?"

Buffy was still staring at where Tara had been just seconds ago, a
worried look on her face. 

"Buffy?"

"Huh?"

"Do you want me to go?"

"No, of course not."  Sighing, she turned back to Spike.  "She won't
say anything if I ask her not to.  Come on, let's go in before they
start wondering what we're doing."

Spike followed her feeling somehow bereft.  He'd agreed with Buffy
that they keep their relationship a secret, but tonight, watching her
dance with another man, having to sneak off to give her his present,
the fear of discovery after being caught sharing a simple kiss, he
suddenly wished things were different.

They were choosing up teams when Buffy and Spike reentered the living
room.  So far it was Xander, Anya and Richard against Willow, Tara
and Dawn.

"Buffy, you're on our team and Spike will be on Xander's," Dawn
called as they entered the room.  Spike refused to play of course, so
that left the teams uneven.  "Well then one person on your team will
have to sit out every round," Anya said officiously.  That was fine
with Buffy.  She would have preferred to sit out every round, but
since it was her party, she had to play.

That didn't mean she had to play well.

She wasn't able to concentrate on the game as she kept thinking about
how one of the gang now knew her secret.  She was sure Tara would
keep silent if she asked her to.  Buffy glanced to where Spike sat
slumped in an armchair taking occasional sips from the bottle of beer
he held in his hand.  He looked dejected and as Buffy sat ignoring
the by-play as Anya tried to act out her clues, she came to a
decision.

The next time Buffy was up she stood and pretended to look at the
phrase on the slip of paper she drew.  It was Tara's turn to sit out,
which worked out perfectly as far as Buffy was concerned.

Looking at her sister and friend she hooked her fingers in the air.

"Quotation," Dawn shouted.

Buffy nodded and held up three fingers.

"Three words!

She held up one finger.

"First word!"

She held her fingers an inch apart.

"Short word."

She nodded again and then pointed at herself.

"Me!" 

Buffy shook her head and pointed at herself again.

"I!" Willow called out.

Buffy nodded and pointed at Willow indicated that was the correct
word.  She then started pulling her fingers apart in a stretching
motion.

"I've!" Willow shouted.

"I'm!" shouted Dawn at the same time.  Buffy touched her nose and
pointed to Dawn.

"Okay," Dawn said gleefully.  "First word is I'm."

Buffy held up two fingers.

"Second word."

Buffy laid two fingers on her arm.

"Two syllables!"

Buffy cupped her ear.

"Sounds like!"

She made a motion as if she were sliding across the carpeting.

"Skating!" Dawn shouted.

Buffy was pointing excitedly at Dawn.

"Skating is right?" Dawn asked.

Buffy cupped ear again.

"Okay, sounds like skating?"

Buffy pointed excitedly again.

"Gating!"

"Rating!"

"Mating!"

"Dating!"

Buffy pointed to her nose and to Willow, her eyes sparkling with
excitement.

"Dating.  So it's 'I'm dating'..."

Three fingers went up.

"Third word."

Buffy placed one finger on her arm.

"One syllable."

Buffy mimicked holding something like a stake.  She then acted as if
she were placing it in the ground then stood up and mimicked hitting
it with a sledgehammer.

"Nailing!" Dawn shouted.  "You're nailing something."

Buffy shook her head and repeated the whole process, this time
pointing to the imaginary object in the ground.

"Pounding!"

In frustration, Buffy made a woo woo signal with her hand and then
mimicked a train pulling out of a station.  She then repeated the
whole hammering pantomime.

"Railroad!" Willow said excitedly.  "I've been working on the
railroad!"

Buffy stopped and looked at her friend in amazement.

"Oh, that can't be right."

"But it has something to do with the railroad?" Dawn said.

Buffy nodded and then pointed to the object in the ground as she hit
at it again.

"Railroad track?" Dawn asked hesitantly.

Finally in frustration, Buffy turned and pointed to Spike.

Dawn's brow furrowed for an instant and then she shouted, "Spike! 
It's a railroad spike!"

Buffy excitedly pointed to her nose and then her sister.

"I'm dating Spike!" Dawn cried out triumphantly.  Then her eyes
widened as understanding penetrated.

The entire room was deadly silent.

"Wait a minute," Anya said.  She reached forward and grabbed up the
slip of paper Buffy had discarded on the coffee table.  "That isn't
what this phrase is."

"No, I think Buffy made that one up herself," Xander said quietly.

Buffy walked over to a stunned Spike and held out her hand.  He took
it and brought it to his lips.

"We've been together a couple weeks now," Buffy said quietly.  "I
just thought you all should know."

"It's a mistake, Buffy," Xander said.

"Maybe, but it's my mistake to make."

"And how many of us will pay the price?  Or have you forgotten Miss
Calendar?"

"No.  But Spike isn't Angel."

"No, he's much worse.  He doesn't have..." A quick glance at Richard
and Xander stopped talking.

"Xander, I'm not discussing this with you.  I'm not asking for your
approval.  I'm not asking for anyone's approval.  I just wanted you
to know."

"Well I think it's cool," Dawn said loyally.

"Thanks, Niblet," Spike smiled.

"Anya, I think it's time to go," Xander said stiffly.  Richard looked
around at the tense faces and stood up too. 

"Uh, thanks for the nice time," he said awkwardly following Xander
and Anya out the front door.  Willow didn't say anything, just began
to gather up dirty dishes.  Tara silently helped.

Dawn walked over and gave first Buffy a hug and then Spike.  "You
know if you hurt her, I'll stake you," she grinned.

"I'd expect nothing less, Bit," Spike grinned back.

tbc...

After the house had been cleaned up, Buffy told her sister and
friends, "I'm going to Spike's.  I'll see you all in the morning."

"Buffy..."

"In the morning, Willow.  We can talk all you like then, okay?"

Spike was out on the porch smoking a cigarette, which he tossed away
when she came out.  "Guess it's time for me to shove off," he said
quietly.  "Give you a chance to talk with your friends."

"I told them we'd talk in the morning," she said.  "I thought I'd
come with you.  I think I promised you a tasty treat."

Spike smirked at her and pulled her into his arms.  "Yeah, come to
think of it, you did."  He leaned his head down to capture her lips
and she responded by wrapping her arms around his back. 

They pulled apart and then walked down the steps, arms wrapped around
each other's waists. 

"Why'd you do it, Buffy?"

Buffy looked down at the sidewalk for a minute then looking straight
ahead said, "I know I should have talked to you first before telling
everyone, but," she glanced over at Spike to see him looking intently
at her.  "But you looked so unhappy and I just decided it was time. 
You're not mad, are you?"

Spike stopped and turned her to face him.  "Mad because you let
everyone know we're together?  Buffy, I love you.  Being with you is
everything to me.  I just wasn't sure what it meant to you."

"It means everything to me too, Spike."

His face was so full of joy and wonder that Buffy's heart skipped a
beat.  Wrapping arms around each other again, they continued their
walk in silence.  They were in the cemetery and halfway to Spike's
crypt before he spoke again. 

"So you think your Scoobies will accept this?"

"They don't have a choice, Spike," Buffy said determinedly.  "I
already told Xander it's not open to debate."

Spike kissed the top of her head.  "I know I should do the manly
thing and say I don't want to come between you and your friends, but
I'm a right selfish bastard."

Buffy just grinned at him.  "Well, what else would a girl expect from
her evil, soulless demon lover?"

Spike vamped and made little bitey movements on her neck causing
Buffy to squeal and jerk back in giggling protest.

The sound of her giggles went straight down his body to his cock. 
Slipping back into human face he growled, "Buffy, if we don't get to
my place soon, I'm doin' you right here on the nearest headstone."

"I'd like to see you try," she whispered huskily.  Pulling his head
to her mouth, she bit down sharply on his earlobe while squeezing his
throbbing arousal.

It was all the invitation he needed.  Before she could react, Buffy
found herself leaning back over a large headstone.  Pressing his body
tightly against hers, Spike kissed her violently, holding nothing
back.  Reaching down he began to pull up her skirt sliding it up her
thigh until he reached her hip.  Slipping his hand around he nudged
her legs apart and shoved aside the crotch of her panties.  She was
wet and slick and when he thrust a finger inside her she moaned and
clenched around him.  Her fists grasped the back of his coat as he
worked his finger in and out, his thumb rubbing against her clit. 
Her moans and whispered pleas drove him wild until, unable to wait
any longer, he pulled his hand away from her and unfastened his
pants.  Pulling out his erection he tore her panties to give him
access, set her up on the edge of the headstone and plunged into
her.  Wrapping his arms tightly around her, he pumped mindlessly.

She wrapped her legs around him and lost herself.  Every nerve ending
in her body was on fire.  The harder he pounded, the wilder she
felt.  When she unexpectedly shoved him away from her, her action
caught him off guard and he fell to the ground on his back.  Looking
up at her in shock, he gasped out, "Buffy?"

Buffy vaulted off the headstone and landed on him, straddling him. 
Leaning forward she grabbed him roughly by the hair and ground her
mouth onto his. Sitting back she grasped his shirt by the collar and
ripped it open.  Scooting further down his body, she ran her
fingernails down his chest leaving red tracks in their wake.  Her
mouth followed, biting his nipples, licking and sucking and nipping
at the flesh on his chest and stomach.  She was wild, unhindered in
her attack on his body, giving him pain and pleasure in equal
measures.  At last she moved back up his body.  She pulled her skirt
up until she was fully exposed to his view.  Reaching down, she
grasped his cock, positioned herself, and slowly impaled herself on
his long, thick shaft as he watched.  Placing her hands on the ground
beside his head she leaned into him and began to clench and unclench
her muscles as she worked him.  Spike gazed at her in wondering
adoration.  When she constricted even more tightly around him, he
arched up and moaned.  His eyes closed and then opened to see that
her head was thrown back and her mouth was open as she began to
come.  When the pulses started, he held her firmly and pistoned his
hips driving forcefully into her until he poured out his release.

She collapsed on top of him.  He held her loosely, his eyes closed as
he recovered.  After several minutes, he opened his eyes to stare up
at the stars. 

"How long is it 'til morning?" he asked with effort.

"I don't know," she murmured.  "Six hours?"

"Oh.  Well, thanks for the amazing shag, pet, but I think I'll still
be lyin' here come sunrise."

Buffy laughed weakly.  Turning her head, she kissed him on the side
of the neck.  "Betcha I can get your motor revving again long before
that."  To prove her point, she undulated her inner muscles around
him, gently kneading his cock.  Spike moaned, arched his body and
sprang back to life.  Buffy relaxed again as she felt him swell
within her.  He could feel her lips curl into a smirk.

"See, told you."

"And you call me evil," he growled as he slowly began to thrust. 
Buffy hissed and sitting up again, moved with him.  Their climaxes
came quickly and this time after they rested they rose to continue
their walk to Spike's crypt.  Spike used Buffy's torn panties to wipe
their spendings from her thighs and then, after inhaling the musk
that saturated them, put them in his coat pocket. 

A flush of heat tore through Buffy as she watched him.  It took them
over an hour to get to the crypt.

***

It was after ten the next morning before Buffy made it home.  Last
night had been the first time she'd had the opportunity to spend the
entire night with Spike and they'd taken full advantage of it, not
falling asleep until nearly dawn.

The only one in the house was Willow working at her computer.  Buffy
could tell by her stiff posture that she was still angry.  Stopping
next to her Buffy said, "Hey, Will.  I'm going to go take a shower. 
Can we talk when I'm finished?"  Willow shrugged, feigning
disinterest and Buffy sighed inaudibly.  She so didn't want to do
this, but knew she owed it to her friend to try to talk it out.

After she'd showered and put on clean clothes, she came downstairs,
fixed some tea and brought in cups for herself and Willow.  In an
attempt to get the conversational ball rolling, she asked, "So,
what're you working on?"

"Some of the CD's from Warren's," Willow answered, her eyes never
leaving her screen.

"Oh.  Anything interesting?"

Willow's hands stilled on the keyboard.  "Why didn't you tell me,
Buffy?  We're supposed to be able to tell each other everything."

"I know, Will.  I just needed time before I let anyone know.  I
wasn't even sure if it would last more than a couple days."  She
smiled at her friend.  "You know how Spike can make me crazy."

"Do you love him?"

Buffy hesitated.  "I care about him.  A lot.  I'm not sure if it's
love.  You know what kind of luck I have with love, so I'm taking my
time there."

"What happens if his chip fails?"

Buffy looked down at her hands folded on the table.  "That's the
question, isn't it?" she said in a soft voice.  "Willow, it's not
like I haven't given this a lot of thought.  Hell, it's not like I
didn't fight this tooth and nail.  I don't think there's an argument
against it I haven't already come up with.  But..."

"But it was bigger than the both of you?" Willow smiled.

Buffy's lips curled in a slight smile.  "Do you want me to be honest?"

Willow nodded, her eyes solemn.

"I kept telling myself that being with him would be wrong.  That he
doesn't have a soul.  That he's a killer only temporarily
restrained.  And I told myself that if that chip fails he'll go right
back to being a killer and then..."

"You'll have to kill him."

Buffy swallowed and nodded.  "Yeah.  Like I had to kill Angel.  And I
don't want to go through that again."

"But..."

"But I wanted him, Willow.  And not just for sex, although that's
totally amazing," she said grinning at her blushing friend.  "I
wanted him so much I hurt - physically, emotionally..." she
paused. "Spiritually," she finished in a whisper.

"Logically I know he's totally the wrong guy to be with.  But I think
he's what I need.  And he's who I want to be with."  Taking a deep
breath she looked at Willow, her head at a proud angle.  "And so I
went to him when I was invisible."

Willow's eyes grew big.  "You mean when you left us to look for other
invisible objects?"

"Yeah.  I did look for other invisible things like I said I would,
but then I went to Spike's crypt.  I didn't mean to go there.  I
mean, not consciously.  But before I realized where I was headed, I
was there.  And, uh, well, things happened."

"So you were there when Xander was looking for you?"

"Uh huh.  That's why I showed up when I did.  God, Willow, I was so
scared when I heard what Xander said.  I was sure I was going to die
and I had so many regrets.  But being with Spike wasn't one of them."
She laughed ironically.  "Not then, anyway.  I tried to break it off
with him that night before we went to the museum, but Spike can be
pretty persuasive when he wants to be.  So I agreed we'd try, see how
things worked out, but it had to be a secret."

"And he honored that."

"Yeah, he did.  I know honor and Spike seem like unmixy concepts, but
he is honorable in his own demony way."

"Well he did allow Glory to torture him rather than give up Dawn, and
he is the one who came up with the plan to save her."

"And he held to his end of the bargain when we went to fight Angelus."

"Of course there's also the time he kidnapped me and Xander and
wanted me to make a love potion to bring Dru back to him and
threatened to kill Xander if I didn't."

"But he told us where you were after Angel and I helped him, just
like he said he would," Buffy championed.

"And then there was the time he came to the dorm and tried to kill me
but couldn't because of the chip."

"Yeah, that was bad," Buffy conceded.

The two girls were silent for a bit.

"Oh!" Willow said excitedly, "but he tried to cheer me up when I got
all Depresso Willow cause I figured I just wasn't good enough to
bite.  Told me he'd thought about biting me that time he kidnapped
me."

Buffy stared at her friend in consternation.  "Willow, I'm not sure
his telling you he'd thought about biting you counts as a good thing."

"Oh.  No, probably not."

They were silent again until Willow perked up.  "But I think he was
saying it to make me feel better.  I mean, you should have seen him
Buffy, he was just so cute."

Buffy smiled and shook her head. "Well, I'll give him that all
right.  He's not short on charm."

"Nope.  And he is kind of a hottie."

"Why, Willow Rosenberg," Buffy teased.  "I thought you didn't play on
that team anymore."

Willow grinned naughtily.  "Hey, just cause I like girls now doesn't
mean I'm blind to good-looking men."

The two friends grinned at each other, the breach mended.  But they
sobered again when Willow said, "Xander's not going to accept this,
you know."

"I know.  And I'm worried about it, Will.  I don't want to lose
Xander's friendship, but I'm not giving up Spike just because he
doesn't approve.  It's my life."

"He'll keep playing the Angelus card, Buffy."

Buffy nodded sadly.  "And he'll never see past that.  But Spike's
different than Angelus.  I truly think that if the chip were to fail,
he'd control himself.  He'd try, at least.  Angelus never tried."

Willow picked at the edge of a piece of paper for a bit and then
said, "You know I could always do the gypsy curse on Spike."

Buffy made a little smile.  "Be a waste of time, Willow.  No way I'm
not sleeping with Spike."

tbc...
 

Buffy stood outside the apartment door for several minutes before
taking a deep breath, lifting her hand and knocking.  After what
seemed like hours but was in truth only seconds, the door opened.

"Buffy!"

"Hi, Anya.  Is Xander home?"

Anya stepped back. "Come in."

Buffy entered the apartment to see her friend slouched down on the
couch idly flipping through channels on the TV.  Walking over to the
couch, she perched on the coffee table.

"Hey, Xander."

"I'm going out for a walk," Anya announced, coat in hand.  "I'll see
you later."

Buffy smiled in gratitude as Anya left the apartment.  Turning her
attention back to Xander she saw that he was still staring straight
ahead at the TV, mindlessly punching the button on the remote. 
Reaching forward, Buffy removed the device from his hand and turned
the TV off.

"Xander, we need to talk."

"Nothing to talk about, Buff.  You said so last night.  Your life,
your decision."

"I know, Xander.  But I don't want you to be upset about it."

Xander turned fake innocent eyes to her. "Why would I be upset,
Buffy?  You have the right sleep with any evil undead thing that
comes to town.  It's certainly none of my business."

"Xander..."

"No, Buffy, really.  Doesn't matter that your boyfriend tried to kill
you, kill me, kill Willow, led that raid on parent-teacher night that
killed how many?  And then there was Sheila and your friend Ford and
god knows how many others just in this town.  But you go right ahead
and date him.  Your life, your decision."

"I know what he's done, Xander," Buffy said quietly.  "I don't need
you to remind me."

"No?  Seems to me you need someone to remind you.  Tell me, Buffy,
just what the hell is it with you and vampires?  Didn't your last
vampire boyfriend teach you anything?  Why can't you find a nice
normal guy to date?  I even brought a nice guy to meet you last night
and you never even gave him a second look."

"And I noticed that you didn't dare tell your nice normal friend what
I do with my evenings," Buffy said just a little heatedly.  "Do you
remember when I tried to date normal guys, Xander?  Owen thought it'd
be great fun to come out with us and get himself killed.  Scott
didn't know anything about my secret identity and he broke up with me
because I had to keep giving him excuses for missed dates.  And how
about Parker, huh?  Now there was a swell guy!"

"And what about Riley?" Xander countered.  "What was wrong with him
that you had to chase him away?"

Buffy stared at Xander as if he'd lost his mind.  "He left, Xander. 
I didn't chase him away.  He left because he couldn't stand not being
superpowers guy, couldn't stand being weaker than his girlfriend,
couldn't stand not being the one in charge and couldn't stand not
being the entire center of my universe.  Well you know what, Xander?"
Buffy stood up and began pacing, infuriated.  "He *wasn't* the center
of my universe at that moment.  I had a hellgod chasing after my
brand new, monk-given little sister *and* my mom was sick *and* I
still had to fight vampires and demons every night *and* try to keep
up with my schoolwork *and* run the household so mom could relax and
not worry about it.  So no, Xander, he wasn't the center of my
universe at that moment and he couldn't stand it so he went off and
got suck jobs from vampire hos and when he got caught, he left!"

"Buffy, I..."

"You know what else, Xander?  You know who I could count on through
that, even when I threatened to stake him?  Spike, that's who.  He's
the one I could trust to protect my mom and sister when Glory was
getting too close.  He was the one who withstood torture to keep Dawn
safe and HE was the one who came up with the plan that saved her in
the end.  So don't you sit there and look down your nose at him. 
Because I trust him with my life.  And more importantly, I trust him
with Dawn's!"

"And will you trust him when that chip stops working?"

"Yes."

Xander just looked at her for a minute, not sure if she was naïve or
insane.  "Then one of us will die."

"You're wrong, Xander.  He's proven to me he's trustworthy.  And he's
promised me he'll control himself."

"Yeah?  What about Warren?  How much did he have himself in control
then?"

"I thought you were all on his side there?  Didn't you tell me that
was extenuating circumstances?"

"Yeah, but..."

"But what?  It's okay for him to bite Warren as long as you don't
know I'm sleeping with him?"

Xander made a face at that statement.

Buffy sighed and sat down again.  "I thought you and Spike were
getting along, friends even."

"Never friends, Buffy.  I just tolerated him because you kept
bringing him into the group.  But I didn't know it was because you
and he were..."

"We weren't, Xander.  Not for most of it anyway.  Our relationship is
still pretty new.  So if you could accept him as part of the group
before you knew he and I were together, what's the problem now?"

"What happens when you two break up?"

"Who says we're going to break up?"

"You pointed it out yourself, Buffy.  When it comes to the dating
game, history is not on your side.  I think you'll probably break up,
and it'll probably be ugly and I think that'll be the final straw for
short, blond and chipped and he'll do something about it and we'll
all die."

"I know there's a risk there, Xander.  I considered all that before I
got involved with him."

"But it didn't stop you."

"No.  It didn't stop me."

"So you love this thing?"

"Don't call him that!"

"Answer the question, Buffy.  Do you love him?"

"I'll tell you what I told Willow.  I don't know.  I just know I care
about him and I want him and I need him."

Xander was quiet for several minutes.

"Have you told Giles yet?"

"No."

"You know he won't be happy."

"I know."

"And that doesn't matter to you either?"

"Yes it matters, Xander.  It just doesn't change anything."

"Then I guess there's nothing more to say.  Your friends matter less
to you that this thi... than Spike."

"No, Xander, that's not what I'm saying."

Getting up he walked over to the front door and opened it.

"Have a good life, Buffy."

"Xander, please."

"I think you should go now."

Buffy looked at her friend with tears in her eyes, rose and silently
left the apartment.

***

Spike awakened when a small, warm body nestled up to him.  Opening
his eyes, he saw Buffy's tear-stained face.

"Buffy?  What's happened, love?  Why are you crying?"

"Just hold me, Spike.  Please?"

"Is Dawn okay?"

"She's fine, Spike.  Please, just hold me."

Spike wrapped his arms around her and held her until she fell into a
fitful doze.  He had no doubts the tears were caused by her friends.

It was times like these he wished he didn't have the chip.

***

"Hey, Harris, girl at four o'clock."

Xander followed Artie's gaze and saw Dawn leaning against his car. 
Smiling, he walked up to the teenager and hugged her.  "Hey, Dawnie,
need a ride home?"

"No, I want to talk to you."

Xander frowned and walked to the back of his car stowing his toolbox
and lunch pail in the trunk.  "If it's about Spike, forget it," he
said flatly.

"It's about Buffy.  Why are you being so mean to her?"

Xander sighed and leaned on the fender next to Dawn.  "I'm not trying
to be mean to your sister, Dawn.  I just can't accept her choice of
boyfriends."

"But why?  Spike's been good lately.  He's helped us.  He helps Buffy
every night."

"Yeah, 'cause he's just so altruistic," Xander said sarcastically.

"What difference does it make why he's doing it so long as he's
helping?" Dawn asked, truly perplexed.

"The difference is, Dawn, that when Buffy breaks up with him, and she
will, blood will flow."

"You don't know that, Xander."

"Yeah, I kinda do.  You were too young to really understand what
happened with Angelus, but it was ugly and it caused someone we all
cared about to die."

"Spike isn't Angelus."

"So Buffy says, too.  But I don't see much difference.  Both are
evil, soulless vampires held temporarily in check."

"And the fact that even without a soul Spike loves Buffy doesn't cut
any ice with you?"

"And when he stops loving Buffy?"

"Hello! Spike here.  This is the guy that was with that nutcase
Drusilla for over a century.  I don't think he stops loving someone
so easy."

Xander shook his head.  "Okay, say he never stops loving Buffy and
she doesn't break up with him and they live the rest of their lives
in a happy Disney forever-after.  There's still what he did in the
past.  That hasn't changed."

"Yeah, okay.  What he did in the past is still there.  Same as what
Anya did in the past," she added quietly.

Xander stiffened.  "That's entirely different, Dawn.  Anya's not a
Vengeance Demon anymore."

"Her past is still there, Xander.  So how's it different?"

"She's human.  She has a soul."

"Yeah, well seems to me having a soul doesn't mean someone is good. 
Take a look at that creep Warren.  Heck, Xander, pick up a newspaper
once in a while.  People do some pretty horrible things and they all
have souls."

"It's not the same."

"Why?  Because you say so?" Dawn said in frustrated ire.  "You know
what you're problem is, Xander?  You're prejudiced.  Spike's a
vampire and it doesn't matter to you how much he's changed, you
refuse to see him as anything but evil."

Taking a deep breath, she continued her tirade.  "I think you have a
lot of nerve treating Buffy like this when she's accepted both Anya
and Tara."  Tears had sprung into her eyes.  "You're just being a big
fat jerk, Xander, and I don't think I like you very much any more." 
Saying that, she pushed away from the car and ran off.

"Dawn!  Dawn, wait!"

She ignored him, running across the street and away from him as fast
as she could.

"You just don't understand, Dawnie," he said softly.

Spike pushed his way through the crowd in The Bronze.  The Slayer was
attending an evening lecture at school and they were meeting here
after.  He'd already made a patrol through town and they'd make
another before returning to his crypt.  At least he hoped they'd
return to his crypt.  They hadn't shared his bed since Buffy came to
it in tears last Sunday.  She always had a good reason, it was late
and she had early class or she was tired or she'd promised Dawn she'd
spend time with her, but Spike knew it was all about Harris and his
holier-than-thou disapproval.  Spike hated to admit it, but he was
worried.

Reaching the bar, he ordered a beer.  After paying for it, he turned
to find a table and saw Xander sitting alone at the end of the bar. 
Walking up to him Spike said, "So, I see you're here with all your
friends."

Xander picked up his beer, took a swallow and said, "Go away, Spike."

"Can't a bloke sit and have a drink with a mate?" Spike asked with a
mocking edge to his voice.

Swiveling away from Spike, Xander stood up and began to walk away.

"Thought you might like to know it's working."

Xander stopped and turned his head slightly in Spike's direction. 
"What's working?"

"I think Buffy's thinking about breaking up with me."

"Be still my heart."

"Yeah, knew it'd make your day.  It may make Buffy miserable, make
her lonely, send her back out to patrol alone, but you'll be able to
shove her back on that pedestal of purity you like to keep her on."

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about."

"Don't you?  She's you're hero, isn't she?  All shiny and pure and
untouchable?  But she's sleeping with me and that makes her less than
pure."

Xander turned around and glared at Spike.  "It makes her insane to
trust you is what it makes her."

"I'd never hurt her and you know it."

"So you say now.  What about when she dumps your ass?"

"Well, it seems we're about to find that out, aren't we?"

Xander stared at Spike for a minute.  "If you hurt her..."

"That's the bloody point I'm trying to make, you git," Spike said in
exasperation.  "*I'm* not the one hurtin' her.  You are."

"I don't know how I can be hurting her," Xander said implacably. 
"She said my opinion didn't matter."

"Yeah?  Well I guess it does.  And for reasons beyond my ken..."

"Well, this is a surprise."

"Buffy!"

"Hullo, love.  Xander and I were just having a chat."

"So I see."  Buffy looked between the two men, the air around them
thick with tension.  "So, who's going to buy me a drink?"

"I will, love.  Diet Coke?"

"Yeah, thanks."

Spike handed her his beer, pressed a quick kiss to her mouth and
walked back to the bar.  Glancing around, Buffy spied an empty
table.  "Wanna sit over there, Xander?"

"I-I gotta go, Buffy."

"Xander, please..."

"Look, I gotta go, okay?"

Buffy looked down and nodded.  "Sure, Xander.  See ya later."

Buffy watched as Xander left The Bronze.  She felt Spike's arm
encircle her waist and leaned back into him.  "He left, huh?"

"Yeah."  Sighing, she took the plastic cup Spike handed her and gave
him his beer.  "There's a table open over there."  Leading the way,
she placed her cup on the table and took a seat.  Spike sat silently
across from her. 

"Anything happen on patrol?"

"Nothing interestin', love.  Staked a bloke risin' from his grave. 
Dusted a truly ugly sod hangin' about the bus station.  That's about
it.  Quiet."

"That's what I found too."  At Spike questioning look, she added, "I
cut out of the lecture.  Can you say 'boring'?  So I thought I'd go
ahead and do a patrol before I met you here."

"Oh.  So you just going to go on home then?"

"Eventually."

At the hopeful look in his eyes, she slid out of her chair and walked
over to him and into his arms.  Kissing him gently, she said, "While
boring lecture guy was talking, I had a chance to think.  I love
Xander, but..."

"But?" Spike prompted.

"But I'm letting him do what I'd said I wouldn't - dictate who I'm
with.  And I miss you.  A lot."  She kissed him again, with more heat
this time.  "And if we don't leave right now I'm going to do you
right here on this table."

Spike pushed her back, stood up, grabbed her hand and pulled her out
of The Bronze and into the night.

***

He tried to pull her into a darkened alley, into a yard conveniently
shrouded by tall hedges and finally managed to tug her between two
vans parked in an unlit corner of a used car lot.  As he pressed her
up against one of the vans, Buffy tried to fend him off.

"Spike, stop.  I want to wait until we're at your place in a nice
warm bed.  It's cold tonight and you don't generate any body heat."

"Oh, I'll make you hot enough for both of us, love," he growled
sliding his hand down and pressing between her legs.  Buffy's breath
caught in her throat as he worked his magic on her.  His fingers
rhythmically curled into her while his mouth was at her ear
whispering how much he loved her, how much he wanted her, telling her
all the nasty little things he was going to do to her.  His voice was
deep and seductive and it was giving her chills that had nothing to
do with the cool wind blowing.  He moved his hand up to fumble at the
button on her slacks and then his fingers slid down to tease her. 
She was hot and wet and slick and little whimpers escaped her.

Buffy was rapidly losing control and knew that within seconds she
would be completely lost to all reason.  Trying desperately to retain
some semblance of sanity, she gasped out, "Spike... oh god.... Spike,
if you... oh yes, right there... no wait, Spike,... uuuhhhh...,
Spike, if you'll wait..."

Breathy moans escaped from her and her hips moved in time with his
fingers. She clutched at his duster holding him tightly to her and
his mouth claimed hers as he brought her near to climax.  Spike was
wild to get inside her and pulled his hand up to push down the
waistband of her slacks.  The momentary cessation of stimulation gave
Buffy a few precious seconds of sanity.  In a last ditch effort to
save her warm tender backside from meeting cold hard steel she
wrenched her mouth away from his and gasped out, "If you wait, I'll
let you tie me up!"

Spike froze.  Lifting his head he gazed in stunned surprise into her
eyes.  "You'll..."

Buffy swallowed.  Her heart was pounding, both from sexual desire and
trepidation over what she'd just told him.  Eyes wide, she nodded
slightly.  "If you wait until we get to your crypt, I'll let you tie
me up."

Very carefully, Spike pulled her slacks back up from where he'd
gotten them pushed down, refastened them and stepped back from the
van, bringing her with him.  He could hardly believe his ears.  He'd
tried to talk her into letting him tie her up on the last night
they'd been together, but Buffy wouldn't allow it.  Now he trembled
at the thought of his Slayer trusting him enough to let him bind her
to his bed.

"You sure, love?"

Buffy could only nod.  He put his hands on either side of her head
and pulled her to him for a deep kiss.  Moving his mouth to her ear,
he whispered, "It'll be good, Buffy, I promise you."  And then taking
her hand, he led her to his crypt and his bed.

***

When they entered his bedchamber, Spike pulled her into his arms. She
was stiff at first, but his light teasing kisses helped her relax.
When he deepened the kisses, she responded and it wasn't long before
his slightest touch set her ablaze.  When her kisses became nibbles
and her nibbles became bites, he pulled away and murmured, "Take off
your clothes, pet, and get in bed.  I'll be right there."

Buffy moaned in protest when he pulled back, but nodded and slipped
her jacket from her shoulders.  She watched him as she undressed.  He
went to a small chest stored in a corner of the chamber, knelt down
and began to rummage through it.  Buffy was half-afraid of what he
would come up with.  Handcuffs?  Chains?  She remembered the last
time she'd been in chains and, with a shiver of revulsion, almost
backed out.  He'd be disappointed, but...  But she'd given her word. 
And besides, there was really no need to feel so uneasy.  He wouldn't
hurt her, even if he didn't have the chip.  Buffy believed this
implicitly.

Finally undressed, Buffy slipped under the covers drawing them all
the way up to her neck.  Eyes never leaving Spike she watched as he
located whatever it was he searched for and stood up. 

He turned and walked towards the bed, a bit of a smile on his face
when he saw Buffy all tucked up under the covers.  He knew she was
anxious.  It would be a loss of control for her, something she didn't
easily give up.  That she would even try for him meant more than he
could ever tell her.

He laid a smallish flat square box on the table next to the bed and
then began to remove his own clothing.  He was aware that Buffy's
eyes never left him, and he was also aware that she liked what she
saw.  When at last he stood before her totally nude, he reached down
and ran his hand along his jutting cock.  "Like what you see,
Slayer?" he purred.

He felt himself get even harder as he watched a faint blush tinge her
cheeks.  That his fierce warrior woman could blush so innocently
astonished and charmed him.  Reaching the bed, he pulled the covers
down and off the bed.  "Don't want anything getting in the way, love."

Buffy watched silently as he reached for the box he had left on the
bedside table.  He opened it and to her surprise brought out a long
silk scarf.  "This all right, love?  Nothing cold and hard against
your skin but me." 

Taking the scarf he ran it up her body starting from her feet and
trailing it up her legs, across her belly and over her breasts. 
Buffy arched into the feel of the soft material and when Spike lay
down beside her and brushed his lips across hers, she opened her
mouth to receive his kiss.

He spent time kissing her, running his silk-clad hand over her body,
teasing at her nipples.  When she was once again writhing against
him, he instructed softly, "Raise your arms, love."

Buffy stiffened only a tiny bit and then obeyed.  Sitting up, he
straddled her and then placing her wrists together he tied one end of
the scarf around them and the other end to the headboard of the bed.

"Not too tight, is it, love?"

Buffy shook her head no.  "My legs?" she asked breathlessly.

"Maybe next time, love, when you feel a little more comfortable with
this.  Once you know what it's like, you won't be so afraid."

"I'm not afraid," Buffy said indignantly. 

Spike smiled.  "Right, not afraid.  Apprehensive?"

"Maybe a little," Buffy replied honestly.

"Trust me, love.  You're going to love what I do to you."

"I do."

At his raised brow, she clarified.  "I do trust you, Spike.  And I
love what you do you me."

Spike lowered his head into the juncture of her neck and shoulder but
not before Buffy had seen the look on his face.  Her words had meant
more to him than he could bear to show.  She turned her head as best
she could and brushed a kiss across the top of his head.

He brought his lips back to hers and they began kissing again.  He
loved making love to her, but he could spend hours just kissing her,
holding her, brushing his hands over her body.  The tactile pleasure
of her heated skin against his cool flesh gave him more satisfaction
than he could have ever imagined. 

He was entering her before he realized what he was doing.  He pulled
out despite her protests and sat back up.  "Not yet, love, not yet,"
he purred.  Leaning forward he began to run his hands lightly down
her arms past her shoulders and down over her breasts.  The touch was
as light as a butterfly's kiss and Buffy arched into the sensation. 
He repeated the action but this time he scooted down her body a bit
and drew his hands over her breasts and down to her belly. Her
stomach muscles quivered as he lightly caressed her.

Her nipples were firm peaks that demanded attention and so Spike
obliged.  Cupping her breasts in his hands, he leaned down and took
just the tip of one nipple into his mouth and sucked while his thumb
brushed delicately over the other.  Buffy's reaction was
instantaneous.  She moaned and arched up into him, tugging at the
bond that prevented her from holding him to her.  He had control and
he took advantage of it.  As he sucked and nibbled and stroked, her
nipples became super sensitized so that every touch seemed
magnified.  He switched breasts, first drawing the nipple into his
mouth and then lightly brushing his tongue over the tip. 

He alternated between sucking her nipples and running his fingertips
lightly over her skin.  Each weightless touch, each insubstantial
stroke heightened her senses, making her desire for contact almost
unbearable.  Had she the use of her hands, she would have pulled him
to her or flipped him over and taken charge of their lovemaking.  But
she could only writhe under him gasping and moaning as he sweetly
tormented her.

When he judged that she'd had enough, he moved down her body.  Each
caress, each lick, each nibble was so light that her nerve-endings
begged for more.  When he finally reached the soft curly thatch
nestled between her legs, he separated the lips and allowed the
barest tip of his tongue to glide against the swollen nub of her
clitoris.  Buffy bucked under him, wanting more stimulation, wanting
his mouth to cover her and for him to lap at her with his whole
tongue.  But Spike would have none of it.  Lying between her bent
knees, he continued to tease her with the light licks and swirls of
his tongue that were driving her insane.  When he inserted his tongue
in her, moving it with a simulation of intercourse, she wrapped her
legs around his shoulders and thrust against him, trying to achieve
deeper penetration.

He removed his tongue from her opening and began jabbing the sharply
pointed tip at her clit in short rapid-fire pulses.  She was
thrashing underneath him, begging him, almost sobbing in her need. 
But Spike was an expert in this and he knew exactly just how far to
go, when the pleasant torture would become simply torture.  When she
had reached that point, when she was on the verge of pain, he moved
back up her body until he was fully covering her.  With her hands
still tied over her head, he kissed her, drawing her tongue into his
mouth and gently sucking. Sitting back up he made one last ghostly
pass over her body with his hands, then covered her body with his and
slipped into her.  Buffy gasped out her relief and began moving
frantically under him.  He pulled out again and said, "No, love,
don't do that.  Let me take care of you, all right?"

"Please, Spike," she begged.  "I need you.  Please, no more teasing. 
Just love me."

"I do, sweetheart.  I will." 

He entered her again and positioning her legs the way he wanted them,
he began to move within her.  His strokes were long and slow and
deep.  He whispered instructions to her, which she instantly obeyed,
and as he increased the pace, her whimpers became moans and her moans
became cries until at last she tightened underneath him and screamed
as her climax tore through her.  Spike's own climax followed
immediately and he collapsed on top of her, his head finding its
favorite resting place in the juncture between her neck and shoulder.

They lie together, replete, still joined and eyes closed as they
recovered.  Their only movement came from Buffy's heaving chest.

A noise brought Buffy back to her senses and she opened her eyes just
in time to see a stake descending towards Spike's naked, vulnerable
back.