==============
Chapter 5
Looking For Love
==============

Spike had now been living with the Summers family for over a month, and things had just gotten better. He was really settled in, and instead of living on the couch, the girls had insisted that he move into the basement. He now had his own bed, and a little fridge for blood, a bookcase, and a recliner of his own. All in all, it was a very comfortable room for the vampire. Just the same, he was very seldom down there. Like right now, for instance.

"I still don't get it," Dawn said. "The little castles only go straight, but the horsies go in an L?"

Spike nodded. "Yeah. And the 'horsies' are called 'knights', and the castles are rooks."

"Ah. And how do the bishops move?"

"Diagonals only. On the same color that they start on."

"So this one," she said, pointing at the bishop next to the her white queen. "Can only go on black squares, and the other one only on white?"

"You've got it," Spike said with a chuckle. "Now, quit stalling. You're just acting like you're confused because I'm winning. Your move."

Dawn pouted. "Fine." She jumped her knight across the row of pawns and left it in front of her bishop. "There."

Spike slid his rook six spaces forward, three in front of her king. "Check."

Dawn snorted, and moved her king backwards and left. "Not now."

The game continued, with Dawn playing incredibly well for someone who was just learning Chess, for another two hours. Finally, Spike managed to corner her king through a move that she made him explain three times just to assure herself that the vampire wasn't cheating. "Checkmate, Bit."

"Rats." She grinned. "Two out of three?"

Spike chuckled. "You're on, Niblet." He set the pieces up again, and the two began again. This time, the game lasted less than an hour, and Dawn won. "Ha! Checkmate, Spikey."

Spike snorted. "Yeah. I let you win."

"You did NOT! I won because I'm good. And we still have to play one more time to see who wins." She gave him an evil grin. "Wanna play for stakes?"

Spike cocked his head. "I'm assuming you don't mean the wooden kind?"

She laughed. "No! I mean a bet. Privledges."

Spike shrugged. "Sure, I guess. What kind of privledges?"

She giggled. "If I tell you, you can't back out, cause you already agreed, okay?"

The vampire closed his eyes. "Now I know I'm not going to like this. What's the privledges?"

She grinned. "Tickling privledges. If I win, I can tickle you for as long as I want, any time I want, for a- No. For TWO weeks."

Spike's eyes got big. "Shit." He shook his head, but agreed. "And when I win, I get the same on you, then?"

She nodded. "Yeah. But you're not going to win."

"We'll see, Bit. We'll see."

==============================================================================================

Buffy and Joyce came home from shopping, and dropped their bags in the kitchen. Both were suprised that the youngest Summers and their vampire houseguest weren't in the living room watching a movie. Buffy cocked her head, hearing something from upstairs. She shot a look at her mom, who shrugged. The two made their ways up the stairs, both carrying weapons, just in case. When they reached the door of Dawn's room, both lowered their weapons. The sounds of struggling that were coming from the bedroom were combined with the sounds of hysterical laughter and a British voice begging for mercy.

Buffy grinned at her mother and opened the door, revealing Spike thrashing around on the bed as Dawn tickled him unmercifully. Dawn looked up, not pausing her assult. She grinned at her sister and mother. "He lost Chess."

Joyce chuckled and leaned on the doorframe, watching as Buffy joined her sister in attacking the vampire, helping to hold him still.

"Nooot faaaairrr!", Spike howled, laughing uncontrolably. "Stooooop!"

Buffy and Dawn giggled and kept up their attacks, going for the weak spots that they now had an intimate knowledge of. There was a spot, high on his ribs, just between the second and third ribs, that would make him go absolutely crazy. And they were torturing the spot on both sides, bringing the vampire to tears. "Pleeeeeeaaaasssseeee!!!??"

From the doorway, Joyce called to her daughters, "Alright, girls. He's had enough now."

Obediently, the girls both stopped their tickling and sat back, giggling at the panting vampire. "You okay, Spike?", Dawn asked playfully.

Spike was still rather unable to respond, due to a fit of giggles that hadn't quite ended yet. Buffy laughed. "Come on, Dawn. Let's help him out a bit." The sisters began gently scratching the vampire's ribs and stomach, getting rid of the itching that they'd caused. This also caused Spike to start purring quietly.

After a moment, they stopped their scratching, and Spike moved up to the head of the bed and leaned against the headboard, still panting slightly. Dawn crawled up next to him and snuggled against his side. Instinctivly, Spike put an arm around her.

Buffy, who was sitting sideways on the edge of the bed, smiled at them. "Since you're so tired now, Spike, you don't have to come patroling tonight, if you don't want to."

Spike chuckled and shook his head. "And miss the chance to kill some nasties with you? Never." Their time together was beginning to mean more to him than he was willing to admit. Spike was falling in love with her, but he didn't want to risk their friendship by telling her that. It was like the dogs in the story that he'd told them a month earlier. As it was, he jumped at the chance to spend time with her, be it patroling, or playing, or anything else she wanted to do.

Buffy smiled. Spike was always willing to come patroling with her. They'd been spending alot of time together lately, and Buffy couldn't be happier. She had no idea why they'd had such a hard time getting along before that fun night at Giles' over a month and a half earlier. They had alot in common. More than they knew.

============================================================================================

"-really nice, and he said that.. Hello, Earth to Spike?" She waved her hand in front of his face. "Spike? Hello?"

"Huh?", the vampire said, slightly startled. "Oh, sorry, luv. I was just thinking."

"Well, did you hear me?", Buffy asked, twirling her stake expertly. They were about an hour into patrol, and had only found a small nest of vamps, and three demons.

Spike gave her a sheepish look. "No. I'm sorry, luv. Really."

She sighed. "Well, see if I ever tell *you* something important again."

He chuckled. "Sorry. I'm listening now. Tell me again?"

She grinned. "Well, I was in the college library, and I accidentally dropped some books off a high shelf, and they hit this guy."

"Hurt him?"

She whacked his shoulder. "No! Anyway, he was really nice about it. And he even invited me out for coffee! His name's Riley Finn."

Outwardly, Spike didn't react, inwardly, his heart fell into his left shoe. "So.. You're going on a date?"

Buffy shrugged. "Not really. It's just coffee. Not a date." Hmm. She'd kind of hoped that he'd object to this.

Spike trotted ahead a ways, then waited for Buffy to catch up. "Good for you, Slayer. It's good that you're over my poof of a Grandsire."

Buffy caught up to him, chewing her lip. "Well.. I'm not really, to tell you the truth. But it is time to move on. Don't you think? I mean, that's why Angel left in the first place, so that I could move on."

Spike snorted. "Yeah. Break you heart for you own good. That's really good reasoning."

She ignored that. "What about you? Do you think you'll ever be over Drusillia?"

The vampire's eyes clouded. "I doubt it. At least, not for quite some time."

She nodded. "Yeah. I get that."

The pair walked on in silence for awhile, pausing only to take out a pair of fledgling vamps. Finally, Buffy broke the silence. "Do you think it's possible?"

Spike was confused. "Possible to what?"

She sighed. "Possible to fall in love more than once in a lifetime."

Spike cocked his head. "I really don't know. I've been in love three times in my entire life and unlife. One totally rejected me, the second dumped me after a hundred years... And the third isn't really relivant here." He hoped he hadn't said too much.

She nodded. "I think I've been in love once that I'm sure of, and a second time that I'm not sure of yet." She bit her lip. "I think I should talk to mom about this."

Spike nodded. "Yeah. I think I'm gonna need to talk to Joyce when we get home, too." He looked at her. "Are you going to go?"

She looked at him. "Go where?"

"For coffee with that guy you dropped the books on."

She chewed her bottom lip for a moment. "Yeah.. I think so. And if that goes well, I'll see what happens. Riley seems like a good guy. And normal. Something that I'm sorely lacking lately. I mean... Look at me. I have a friend who's a practicing witch, another tentitive friend who used to be a vengence demon, and I'm living with a ticklish vampire in my basement," she finished with a giggle, looping her arm through his and leaning her head on his shoulder.

Spike chuckled. "Yeah? Well, look at me. Former Big Bad, who now has a chip in my brain, can't hunt humans, and is living with the Slayer's family." He gave her a sideways hug as they walked. "And loving it, I might add."

Buffy giggled. "Yeah. Me too. And Mom and Dawn love you. You're like Dawn's... fangy big brother. Teaching her chess, and playing with her all the time. And Mom just loves having someone else who can cook for when she's tired from work. You're a big hit."

Spike laughed a little. "Yeah. Your biological family loves me. As for the rest of your Scoobies, I don't think they like me much."

Buffy sighed. "Well... Willow likes you. She's a little nervous around you, but I think she likes you. I know Giles likes you. Anya.. She doesn't care, really. She's been focused on Xander for awhile now. And Xander.. I won't sugar coat it. He hates you. Alot."

Spike snorted. "The feelin' is mutual."

She laughed. "Yeah. I know. Well, he'll put up with you because I like you. So you don't have anything to worry about."

Spike paused, allowing Buffy to move a couple paces ahead of him. "Yeah," he muttered. "Nothing to worry about."

===============================================================================================

Two nights later, and Buffy was out on her 'not date' with Riley Finn, and Dawn was spending the night at a friend's house, leaving Spike home alone until Joyce got home from the Gallery. He spent the time lounging on the couch, watching reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond.

Finally, the door opened and Joyce came home. "Spike?"

"Living room." He got up and took her purse and jacket. "Would you like me to fix you something for dinner, ducks?"

Joyce sighed. "If it wouldn't be too much trouble. I take it Buffy's on her date?"

Spike barely concealed a snort. "Yeah. Left an hour ago. And Bit's over at Kelly's." He headed for the kitchen. "I think we've got some left over lasagna from last night. Want it?"

Joyce settled on the couch. "Yes. Will you join me, Spike?"

Spike stuck his head around the corner from the kitchen. "Well.. Sure, I guess."

Joyce sighed. "Good."

Spike brought two plates of warmed up lasagna in and settled on the couch next to Joyce. "Rough day in the world of art?"

Joyce chuckled. "Let's just say it was surreal with a little post-impressionism thrown in for variety."

Spike chuckled. "That bad, huh?"

"Oh, let's not talk about it." She took a bite of lasagna. "Mm. It's even better the second time. So, what's new with you?"

Spike swallowed. "I think I might be in love with your daughter." His eyes got huge. Why the HELL had he told her THAT!?

Joyce, for her part, just made an interested 'hmm'ing noise. "Isn't Dawn a bit young for you?"

Spike choked. "Huh!? No, I meant-"

Joyce sat her plate on her lap and patted him on the shoulder with a laugh. "I know what you meant, Spike. You just looked so.. serious. I thought I'd help you calm down."

Spike shook his head with a chuckle. "Alright. It worked." He looked at her hopefully. "So, you're not mad at me?"

She shook her head. "I was just wondering when you'd notice it."

"What?"

She laughed. "Ever since you moved in here, and probably before. The way you look at her, talk to her. The way you react when she's near you, when you play together. It's been obvious to me for some time."

Spike chuckled. "And I just figured it out last week." He sighed. "And now she's out with another guy."

Joyce finished eating and put her empty plate on the coffee table. She reached over and gently scratched at the back of Spike's neck, something that Buffy had shown her to help her calm him down. "It'll be okay, Spike. Buffy is very picky about the people she lets into her heart. You're already in there, whether or not you belive it."

The vampire sighed and leaned on Joyce's shoulder, allowing her to continue her scratching. "You really think so?"

Joyce nodded and rubbed small circles on his back. "Of course. She already knows what a great guy you are." She gently kissed the top of his head in a motherly way and gave him a sideways hug. "Spike, what's your name?"

He pulled back and cocked his head at her. "Joyce, you know my name. Did a painting fall on your head today or something?"

Joyce laughed. "Not 'Spike'. What's your real name?"

Spike sighed. "William. William Edwards Junior." This must be flashback day. "I was.. a poet. Sort of."

Joyce smiled and hugged him again. "Does Buffy know that?"

"My name, or the other thing?"

"Both."

Spike sighed and shook his head. "Name, yes. First only. As for the rest, no. In fact, you're the first person that I've told in.. well, ever."

Joyce smiled. "Well then, I suppose you had a reason."

Spike smiled and shook his head. "Yeah. Although I don't know what it was."

Joyce stood up, taking their plates to the kitchen. "Well, I'm sure you'll figure this out."

Deep sigh. "I wish I was so sure." But he had figured something out. Hopefully, he wouldn't have to go to the drastic measures that their conversation had brought to his mind. It would all depend on what Buffy said when she got home.

===============================================================================================

==============
Chapter 6
Shopping Disease
==============

Shopping. Not a bad way to spend an evening, really. Especially since Spike was in the company of his three favorite humans.

"Okay," Joyce said, looking at her list. "Hmm. Spike, Dawn, you two go get sugar, milk, macaroni and cheese, frozen pizza, and.. Oh, just take this half of the list."

Spike chuckled and accepted the half of the list that Joyce handed him. "Don't worry, Joyce. We'll meet you and Buffy in the frozen foods." He and Dawn went to get their own basket, and their half of the groceries.

Buffy watched until she was sure that the vampire and her sister were out of hearing range, then, "Mom? I have a problem."

Joyce pushed their basket toward the vegitables. "What is it, dear?"

The Slayer sighed. "I think I'm in love."

Joyce smiled at her. "Oh? And why is that a problem?"

"Because it's with two guys at once."

Her mother frowned. "That *is* a problem. May I ask who they are?"

Buffy picked up a pear and frowned at it. "Riley. And... Well, can we just deal with this one at a time?"

Joyce took the pear, put it down, then picked up a better one and placed it in her bag. "Alright. It seems pretty simple to me."

Buffy picked up a peach and sniffed it. Frowned, and put it back. "Simple? This is not simple. This is... impossible!"

"Who did you love first?"

"Sp- The other guy."

"Then go with him." Inwardly, Joyce sighed. Another vampire. Oh, well. At least she liked this one. And trusted him. Unlike that Angel fellow. He was bad news from the start.

"It's not that easy, Mom! He's... he's.. There're reasons that it wouldn't work. Besides, he's my friend."

Joyce had to say it. "Xander?"

"NO!" She nearly dropped her banana. "No. Not Xander. Another.. friend guy."

"Just tell Spike how you feel."

"I can't. He- MOM!" She did drop the banana that time, but caught it before it fell too far. She gave her mom an incredulous look. "You knew?!"

Joyce chuckled and nodded. "It *was* rather obvious, dear. It was either Spike, or Mr. Giles. And I seriously doubted the second possibility."

Buffy made a face. "Eww. A world of no on that one." She sighed. "Am I really that obvious?"

"Only to your mother." Joyce picked up a bunch of bananas and bagged them. "And why wouldn't it work? Spike cares for you, you know."

"I know." She laughed a little. "Did you know he purrs?"

Joyce smiled and nodded. "Yes. He's like a big cat at times."

Buffy smiled. "Okay. I'll do it." She shook her head. "Wait a minute. I can't tell him! I'm not even sure of it yet. And besides. He probably just thinks of me as a friend, anyway."

Joyce sighed. If only she could tell her daughter what their vampire had told her two weeks earlier. But she wouldn't betray his confidence. Not directly. "You might be suprised, Buffy. Spike is a very... complex person."

"Unperson."

"Whatever."
================================================================================================

"Last thing's the sugar," Dawn said from her perch on the end of the basket that Spike was pushing. At thirteen years old, she didn't think that she'd quite outgrown riding on the end of the basket yet. "Then we can go find Mom and Buffy."

Spike was scanning the signs that said what was on each isle. "Sugar.. sugar. Sugar. There it is." He turned the basket onto the isle. The sugar was at the far end. However, the closer he got, the weirder he started feeling. Nauseaous. Dizzy. He shook his head to clear it and kept pushing. Got a bag of sugar and turned the basket around to go back in the other direction. The feelings got worse. Spike was really feeling as if he was going to hurl. Which was supposed to be impossible for a vampire. He clamped his jaws shut, holding one hand to his stomach and rubbing gently. Trying to get the nausea to pass. Dawn was saying something, but he wasn't paying attention, he was too busy trying to keep his breakfast down.

"-and then she.." Dawn trailed off, looking at her companion with her head cocked sideways. "Spike? Are you okay? You look paler than usual."

He shook his head. "Somethin' s not right, Bit. I don't feel so good." Blinked hard, cause his vision was going a little. Once they got out of the isle where the sugar had been, he started feeling a bit better. He leaned on the cart a little. "Ooh. What was on that isle besides sugar?"

Dawn got off the end of the basket to walk to his end and pat him on the back a little. She glanced up at the sign. "Flour, spices, canola oil, sugar." Her eyes got wide. "Uh-oh. Spices. That means garlic powder. Did the garlic powder make you sick?"

He shook his head. "I'm not sick. But that is probably what caused it. I'm okay, now." He motioned to the end of the basket. "Go on, get back on and let's find the family, shall we?"

Dawn gave him one last worried look, before climbing back on the end of the basket. She still didn't like his color. Too pale with a hint of green. That was not normal. He'd looked kind of like that a few days earlier when her mom had forgotten about his 'allergies' and made garlic spagetti sauce. "Are you sure that you're okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Fine." Too bad his stomach didn't agree with him.
==============================================================================================

A couple of hours later, they were back home, and all the groceries had been put up. Spike was down in his basement, laying on the bed, trying to will away the nausea that he was still feeling. He licked his lips slightly. This was most definitely *not* a good feeling. Not a good feeling at all.

"Spike?" Buffy's voice. "Are you okay? We're about to put on a movie."

"Not so sure I should get up right now, luv. Not really feelin' up to a movie."

Buffy came downstairs and sat on the edge of the bed. "Dawn told us about the garlic powder." She put a hand on his forehead. "You don't feel hot or anything. But I guess you'd have to have a pretty high fever to feel hot to me, huh?"

Spike licked his lips again. "Yeah. About twenty degrees above normal, for me."

Buffy cocked her head. "You know, when Dawn or I get nauseaous, mom gives us flat coke. It really helps."

Spike sighed. "I don't think that would work for me. My stomach doesn't exactly work like your's, luv." Gave her a half smile. "Thanks for caring, though."

She smiled down at him, gently stroking a hand over his hair. "Like I wouldn't care about you. I lo-" Swallowed. "Care about you. You're my friend, and Dawn's surrogate big brother. My mom loves you. Dawn loves you."

He swallowed. "I- uh. I love them, too. And.. And I'll try to come upstairs. What're we watching?" Bloody git, he thought with a mental snort. All you had to say was, 'I love you'. Three words. Eight letters. Too hard to say.

Buffy laughed a little. "Shrek. Dawn picked."

Spike chuckled, his stomach feeling a little better at the prospect of spending an evening with his favorite girls. "Ok, luv. I'll be up in a minute."

Buffy grinned. "Great. I'll tell Mom and Dawn to hold the movie for you." She got up and headed back upstairs. Paused at the top of the stairs turned around. "Spike?"

Spike sat up slowly. "Yeah, luv?"

"Remind me how your story ended. Did Prince and Misty live happily ever after?"

Spike chuckled. "Yeah. They did."

She swallowed. "Even though they wound up in love, did they still stay friends?"

Spike stood at the bottom of the stairs. "I would think so. Maybe even better friends." Hope surfaced, unbidden. Bleedin' hell. She's not talking about you, ya git. She's prolly talking about that Riley guy.

Buffy smiled. "Good." Opened the basement door. "DAWN! DON'T START THE MOVIE! SPIKE'S COMING!!" Door shut behind her.

Spike shook his head and chuckled, then trotted up the stairs. Well, there was hope. He had to believe that there was hope, otherwise, this would turn into Cecily all over again.
=============================================================================================

============
Chapter 7
Thanks To You
============

Tummy ache. That's what Dawn called it. Halfway through watching the movie, Spike'd gotten up and run to the bathroom and puked up his blood. That had been a week earlier. Giles had been over and diagnosed the vampire with a type of undead stomach flu, acredited to a little chicken blood in his supply. The Watcher had said that he was lucky. If Spike had been human, he could very well have come down with an E. coli infection. As it was, he'd just felt really lousy for the last week.

On the upside, Buffy had taken to spending the night with him, on his bed, cuddling and comforting the vampire through the worst of the cramps. And she'd held him all night several times. It had been more than a comfort for Spike, however. It had been an inspiration. In the times that he'd been alone, which wasn't that often, for one of the Summers was almost always with him, he'd turned to writing. Not poetry, however. Well... not really. It was poetry, in a way. He'd written a song. With Dawn's old keyboard that he'd found, he'd renued his old human habit of playing piano, and combined the music with his poetry. It took about four days, but he'd finally come up with a finished product that he was proud of. Now all he had to do was get Buffy alone.

One day, when he wasn't feeling very nauseaous, he decided to go upstairs and see if he could find the Slayer and arrange just that. However, he didn't know that the family had company.

As he approached the top of the basement stairs, he could hear four voices in the kitchen. And one of them was only vaguely familiar. That meant that it wasn't one of the Scoobies. He knew all their voices by heart at that time, and couldn't figure out who this other person was. Male. He could tell that much, and he KNEW that he had heard that voice somewhere before. Something about it... made the short hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. Whoever it was, wherever he'd encountered this person, it wasn't linked to a good memory. He cracked the basement door, and looked out through the small hole, sniffing experimentally. That scent... It made him think of pain. Of fear. Of... the Initiative. If only that person would move where he could... THERE!

His eyes widened, and flashed gold. A low growl rumbled from his throat before he could check it. Thankfully, Buffy seemed to be the only one who noticed it. She flashed him a smile, and motioned for him to come out. His only response was to shut the door. And go back down the stairs.

Riley Finn. COMANDER Riley Finn. Now he remembered where he'd heard that name before. That... person was the one who'd observed the Inititive's tests on him. Watched, as their so-called doctors poked and prodded at him. Watched as they cut him open, without any sedatives, without any painkillers, just to see if the vampire digestive tract was any different from that of a human counterpart. Who WAS sedated, by the way. Watched as those military cronies had hurt him, and scared him, and locked him in a tiny cage, KNOWING that vampires have an innate sense of clustrophobia. Knowing that him being locked in there would all but destroy him, and not caring. He was an animal to them. Just a lab rat, without feelings or life. Deep inside, he knew that if he hadn't gotten out when he did, he would have gone insane. Same as Dru before him. Totally nutso. Maybe he'd finally hear that bloody music that she'd always been talking about.

He lay down on his bed, trying to get his suddenly erratic breathing under control. He couldn't believe it. The guy that Buffy was DATING (unofficially) was one of those bleedin' army assholes! He swallowed, licked his lips, and swallowed again. This was horrible. Totally horrible. No other word for it. He was still laying there when Buffy came downstairs.

"Hey." She had her head cocked to the side, and a look of worry on her face. "Are you okay? I thought you might come out and meet Riley. Did you feel sick again?"

Spike sat up a little. "No. Well, sort of. You could say that I felt sick. Luv, where did you say that you met Riley?"

She sat on the bed next to him. "At the college. Why?"

"Cause I've seen him before. But it wasn't at the college."

Buffy smiled at him. "Oh? Where?"

Spike bit his lip. Now was not the time for this, his instincts told him. "Uh.. I forget. But it wasn't too long ago." He licked the lip that he'd just bit. "Are you busy right now?"

She shrugged. "Not really. Dawn and Mom went out for ice cream. I wanted to stay here, cause I thought you didn't feel good." She put a hand to his forehead. "You still feel a bit clammy. Want me to stay with you tonight?"

He gave a half nod. After all, it wasn't milking his condition if *she* offered to stay, right? "If it wouldn't be too much trouble." Take a leap. Go on. "Besides. I've got somethin' I'd like to... show you."

She grinned. "Really? Hmm. I wonder what that could be..."

He chuckled. Then licked his lips nervously. "I want to do it now, if that's okay with you. Since we're the only ones home, there's no chance of being interrupted." Ok.. That sounded a little *too* sexual. He hoped she hadn't caught it.

She laughed quietly. "Alright. What do I have to do?"

"Just stay there. I'll.. be right back." He got up and walked over to where he'd stored the big six octave keyboard, and took it and the stand over and set them up in front of a chair.

"Gonna give me a concert?", Buffy asked with a giggle.

"Somethin' like that, luv. Hang on." He went to the far side of his bed and got his notebook. He cleared his throat. "I.. uh.. wrote you a song..."

Her jaw dropped slightly, then she smiled hugely. "Wow. Really? For me? It's not even my birthday or anything."

He settled in his chair and turned the keyboard on. "Yeah.. well.. I needed to tell you something. I've been tryin' for some time now. Just thought that this would be easier."

She settled back on the bed. "Well, then tell me." Smiled at him. I'm waitin', Spikey."

He chuckled. She was getting really good at making him feel better when he was nervous, or anything, really. "Alright. Hang on. Lemme get started." He switched on pure piano on the keyboard, and began to play a medium speed tune. After a moment, he began to sing.

"Not so long ago,
I packed my bags a hundred times.

Didn't seem to know,
How to stop, or to unwind.

Goin' nowhere,
A man without a dream.

Guess my lucky star,
Fell the day you came along.

To my lonely heart,
You are like a special song.

Singing sweetly,
Your tender melody...

Thanks to you,
The child inside me lives again.
Thanks to you,
I have found the peace within.
I know where I'm going,
And what I want to do..
Thanks to you...."

Another instrumental part, during which Spike had to force himself not to look at Buffy's expression. The next part was a gamble. And he knew it. But he had to do it. It was the whole point. He began singing again.

"Lying in your arms,
I've found my greatest pleasure.

I look into your eyes,
And dream about forever.."

He chanced a glance at the Slayer. To his suprise, she not only wasn't mad, there were tears streaming down her cheeks. It gave him the courage to continue. Time to finish the song. Deep, unneeded breath.

"Wakin' up with you,
And looking forward to the day.

What we plan to do,
Knowin' anything at all's okay.

Life has a meaning,
And love has got a name...

Thanks to you,
The child inside me lives again.
Thanks to you,
I have found the peace within.
I know where I'm going,
And what I want to do..
Thanks to you..

Thanks to you."

He trailed off, and played the instrumental ending of the song. Deep sigh. Well, he'd done it. Now it was time to get her reaction. Swallowed and looked up. "Well, luv? What do you think?" Bit his lip. Please. Anything but... patronism. Please don't let her say that I'm... beneath her... Swallowed. "Well?"

Buffy wiped at her eyes and sniffled. "Spike... I.. you're... that was wonderful."

His jaw dropped slightly before he could check it. "Really?"

She smiled, still swiping at tears. "Yeah. Beautiful, and wonderful, and good.. I can't believe.. That was for me?"

He nodded, feeling the strange sensation of an almost heartbeat begin within him. Nervousness, or excitement, always did that to him. Said it without thinking. "Every syllable."

She stood up, walked over to him, and hugged him tightly. "Thank you. That has to be the single most wonderful, nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me." She pulled back. "Were you saying what I think you were saying?"

He shivered a little, and tried to convince himself that it was from the stomach flu. "If.. if you think that I was trying to tell you that I.. that I love you.. you're right." Swallowed and continued quickly. "Of course, if that's not what you thought I was saying, ignore my last comment and replace it with 'what did you think I was sa-' " He was interruped when she gently pressed her lips to his, cradling his face in her hands.

When they parted, she smiled shyly at him. "What took you so long?"

He was a little flustered. "Well I... what about Riley?"

She kissed him again. "Forget Riley. I love you, Spike. I have for over a month now. I was.."

"Scared," he finished for her. "Me too. And I couldn't figure out how to tell you, so I..."

"Wrote me the most beautiful musical poem that I've ever heard?"

"Well, yeah.." He cocked his head at her. "Wait a minute. Musical poem?"

She nodded sheepishly. "Yeah.. Mom kind of.. slipped about you being a poet when you were human."

He closed his eyes. "Bloody hell."

"Way to ruin the mood, Casonova."

He chuckled, then looked at her wonderingly. "You.. love me?"

"Yes."

"I love you, too."

She laughed quietly. "I know." Stepped back from him. "I'll be right back. I'm not spending the night down here in my day clothes."

He chuckled. "Yeah. I'll change, too."

A few minutes later, they were curled together on his bed, with Buffy against his back, her arm around his side, rubbing his stomach gently. Even though most of the symptoms of the 'stomach flu' had suddenly vanished. Spike was beginning to believe that the whole thing had just been nerves. They were both really close to dozing off, but there was something that he had to say.

"Luv?"

"Mmm?", came the sleepy reply from behind him. He could feel her warm breath on the back of his neck.

"I love you, Buffy Summers."

Quiet chuckle from behind. "And I love you... William Edwards Junior."

"Bloody hell."

==========================================================================================

=====================
Chapter 8
Ya Think Ya Know A Guy...
=====================

A week. A week of pure heaven. At least, as far as everyone in the Summers household was concerned. Buffy and Spike were spending so much time together that they practicly seemed to be attached at the hips, and Dawn and Joyce couldn't be happier. Spike had become a vampire Martha Stewart, cleaning and cooking, just because he felt like it. When he was in a good mood, Joyce rarely had to do anything, and he was in a good mood all the time, now.

Even patroling seemed easier than usual, with Spike and Buffy going together every night, hardly any nasties were even daring to come out. This, of course, lead to alot of goofing off during patrols. And smoochies. And just basic sillyness. Like what they were doing now.

"Where are you, Slayer?", Spike called, walking around the jungle gym. "Come on. I can smell you, luv. I'm gonna find you soon enough. So why don't you just save yourself the trouble and- OOF!"

He'd walked under the monkey bars. The same monkey bars that Buffy'd been perched atop. She swung down, knocking him onto the soft padding of the pile of wood chips and sand that surrounded the playground. "Ha! Who got who, Mr. Big Bad?"

He growled playfully, and rolled over, dislodging her, then over again, the other way, reversing their previous possitions. "Why, I believe that I've got you, luv."

Buffy, being the very mature person that she was, gave the only response that seemed approapriate. She stuck her tongue out at him.

He chuckled. "Aw, come on. No fight? And I was so looking forward to- AHH!"

Reversed the hold again, and kept it that way by attacking his ribs with her fingers. "I win," she giggled, tickling mercilessly.

Spike thrashed and laughed, but finally admitted defeat, and was released. The moment both of them regained their footing, he growled loudly, and charged at her. This started a race around the park, that ended at the see-saws. Panting, Buffy held up her hand for a break. Spike oblidged, leaning on a tree and grinning at her. She sighed, and layed on a see-saw, keeping it balanced. He stretched a little, then walked over to lay on the see-saw next to her.

"They're beautiful, you know," Buffy said quietly after awhile.

"Assuming you're talking about the stars, yes, they are." Playfully suggestive grin.

She would've swatted him gently, except that she thought it would thrown off her balance. "Of course I'm talking about the stars, blood breath."

"Hey, you kiss me, remember?"

She ignored him, except to smile, and considered the night sky again. "I never really look anymore. I mean, they're there every night, and I just don't look."

Spike gave a half nod. "Yeah. I used to look at 'em all the time. Dunno when I stopped, really. But you are right. They are beautiful. Do you know constellations?"

She looked over at him. "Some. Like.. Orion's Belt. But I only know that from Men In Black."

Spike chuckled. "Do you see it? Those three, right there."

She looked hard. "The bright ones?"

"Yeah."

She cocked her head. "Why do they call it a belt? Looks more like... headlights."

He chuckled again. "Don't think of it as lights. Think of it as... connect the dots. Now, follow my finger, and tell me what you see." He used his finger, very slowly, to trace a pattern in the sky.

Buffy squinted. "A.. guy? With.. something in his hand."

Spike nodded. "That's Orion the Hunter. The thing in his hand is either a bow and arrows, or a sword. I can't remember. He's hunting Leo, the lion. Right there, see? Here's the tail, and the legs..."

"Yeah!" Buffy brightened immensely. "What's that long one? The group there."

"Draco, the Dragon. And there's Aquarius, the water bringer. And Aries, the ram. And Taurus, the bull."

"I thought Taurus was a car."

"What do you think they named it after, luv?"

"Oh."

Spike considered the stars for a moment. "Ok, see the Big Dipper there? Looks like a big spoon."

"Yeah."

"Ok. Now, think of the end of the handle. Ignore the rest of the Dipper. Focus on the group of five stars right near the end of the handle. What's that look like to you?"

Buffy considered. "A.. fish? No.. wait. OH! A dolphin!!"

Spike nodded. "Yep. Delphinious, the Dolphin. Thought you'd like that one."

Buffy got off her see-saw carefully, and walked to a picnic table, hopping up to sit on the table itself. Spike followed, stretching out on the bench part of the table. Buffy looked down at him. "Thought we could see better here. Less trees in the way."

"Always good."

They lay there in silence for awhile, then Spike moved up onto the table with her. In no time, they were lost in a passionate make-out session. That is, until they were rudely, and painfully, interrupted. Something slammed into Spike's side hard, sending him rolling off the table with a growl. He leaped to his feet, and Buffy sat up, ready to fight whatever had interrupted them, but she wasn't prepared for who she did see. "Riley?"

Riley was pointing some kind of gun at Spike, and he was dressed in military garb, camos and everything. "Stay back, Buffy. That creature isn't what it seems."

Spike leaned against a tree, wishing for a moment that he hadn't given up smoking at Joyce's request, cause he could really use one then. Outwardly, he was the picture of calm. Inwardly, he was shaking.

Buffy gave Riley an annoyed look. "Look, Riley. I know exactly what I'm doing. Can you please leave us alone?"

Riley didn't take his eyes off of Spike. "You aren't safe here, Buffy. Just let me handle-"

Buffy stood up, and grabbed the rifle by the barrel, forcing Riley to look at her. "Who do you think you are, Riley Finn? Coming in here, assulting my boyfriend. I told you a week ago. It's over between us. I'm sorry if I somehow didn't communicate that point clearly enough, but you need to go now."

Riley looked at Spike. "Let her go, Hostile 17."

Spike shrugged. "Let her go? She's ten feet from me, mate." Time to make an admission. "I think it's you, Commander, who should let her go."

Buffy looked up, confused. "Commander? Hostile 17? What the hell are you two talking about?"

Riley ignored her again. "You have her in a thrall, vampire. I can tell. She'd never lower herself to being with a HST."

Buffy looked to Spike this time. "HST?"

Spike and Riley answered at the same time. "Hostile Sub Terrainian."

Spike took a step forward. "Commander Finn is with the army blokes that shoved this bleedin' chip in my brain in the first place. He was my... observer. Watched everything they did to me. Every time they hurt me, he was there, directing them. Telling the little lab rats where to cut, and what to pull out." His voice was becomeing strained, but he steadied it as best he could, adding a growl for emphasis. "Hostile 17 was my reference number. He's one of them."

Buffy's eyes got wide, but she didn't release the rifle. "Is that true, Riley?"

Riley nodded. "Yes, Buffy. Now, if you'll let go of my taser rifle, I'm going to put this run away back where he belongs."

"Over my dead body," Buffy said with something that sounded suspiciously like a growl. "I have something to tell you, too, *Commander* Riley Finn." She grabbed the barrel of the rifle in both hands, and bent it, curling it around like this was a Bugs Bunny cartoon, and Riley was Elmer Fudd. She didn't even pause to take in the shocked look on his face, before she continued. "I am the Slayer. Vampire Slayer. And Spike is my boyfriend, and practicly a part of my family. If you ever come near him, or touch him, or hurt him in any way..." She held up the rifle pretzel. "This is nothing, compared to what I will do to you."

Riley stood there, stunned, as Buffy walked over to Spike, took his arm gently, and lead him away without even looking back. When they were out of sight, Buffy asked Spike if he'd known before, and why didn't he tell her if he did. He responded by saying that it was just a very tramatic memory for him, and he hadn't wanted to bring it up. This prompted Buffy to ask again what exactly the Inititive had done to him. This time, Spike told her. In detail.

Half an hour later, Riley Finn was taken by ambulance to Sunnydale Memorial Hospital with a broken arm and nose. An early morning jogger had found him leaning against a see-saw, cradleing his bleeding nose, and had called 911. That was the last time Riley Finn had anything to do with Buffy Summers, or her boyfriend, Spike.

===========================================================================================

=============
Chapter 9
Scoobies & Star
=============


"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Xander said, staring open mouthed at his friend. "I knew Spike was living in your house. I am *sort* of okay with that. I even knew that you had some sort of feelings for him, which I am most definitely *not* okay with. But now you tell us that you're DATING SPIKE!"

Buffy bit her lip and nodded. "Yeah..."

"Buffy.. how.. why... What are you thinking!? It's just that stupid chip that keeps him from killing all of us! You KNOW that!" Crossed his arms over his chest. "Or at least, you *used* to know it." He looked to Willow. "Will, please tell me that Buffy's in a thrall, or something?"

Willow's mouth was hanging open, which effectivly prevented her from answering. She fishmouthed for a moment. Then, caring best friend mode turned on. "Is he.. Nice to you, Buffy?"

Xander couldn't contain his shock. "Will, you are not going along with this-"

"Gimme a minute, Xander, okay?"

Reluctantly, the boy nodded. Willow turned back to Buffy. "Is Spike nice to you? He doesn't try to hurt you, or anything?"

Buffy nodded, latching onto the line of hope that her friend had just thrown her. "Oh yeah. He's great. And he plays with Dawn, and helps Mom around the house. And he's sweet, and romantic, and he even wrote me a poem." She sighed. "He's perfect."

"If you can get past that whole 'evil, bloodsucking demon' thing," Xander muttered. The girls ignored him.

Willow smiled. "Last time I saw him, you two were on the verge of killing each other. What happened in the last three and a half months?"

Buffy wrinkled her nose. "I don't really know. It's like... Once I got to know him better, he wasn't so bad, you know? Once he relaxed, and really started being himself, and not trying to be the Big Bad all the time, I just couldn't help but like him, you know?"

Xander butted in again. "You're telling me that he's not the same Spike we all know and despise? Gee. Now why do I find that so hard to believe?"

Buffy sighed, and stood up. They'd been sitting around a secluded table at the Bronze, but right now, outside would be a much better place. "Guys, let's talk and walk, okay? And I'll try to explain better."

Fifteen minutes later, the three friends were heading home, still discussing the Spike issue, but Xander'd lost a little of his venom. There hadn't been any argument that he'd put up that Buffy hadn't been able to counter. Not a single one. So he was back to the main problem. "He doesn't have a soul, Buffy."

To his suprise, it was Willow who countered that argument. "Xander, think about it. There are horrible human beings. Hitler comes to mind. They have souls. They can feel guilt, and remorse. It doesn't make them any less evil. So maybe it's possible for a being without one to be no less good than a normal person. And who are we to talk about normal!? Look at you, Xander. Your most recent relationships include a giant preying mantis, a life sucking Incan mummy girl, and Cordelia Chase! You can't talk. And me. I dated a Werewolf through most of High School! I don't think we have the right to criticize Buffy's relationships anymore."

As she went through this speech, Xander's head had dropped lower, and Buffy's grin had gotten wider. Willow turned to Buffy. "I'm happy if you're happy, Buffy."

Xander sighed, and shrugged, giving in. "Yeah.. Okay. Fair enough. But if he so much as lays a fang anywhere near you, I am personally going to stake him."

Buffy grinned again, and hugged both of her best friends in turn. "Thanks, guys. And don't worry, Xander. Spike not only doesn't want to hurt me, he can't. Chip, remember? So it's all for the best."

By then, they'd reached the Summers home, and Buffy said goodnight to her friends, then headed inside. She needed to find Spike. Looked in the basement. No Spike. In the kitchen. No Spike. Upstairs, still no Spike. And no Mom or Dawn, either. She was starting to get nervous, when she saw the note taped to the fridge.

"Dear Buffy,
Dawn and I have gone out to pick up a few things, be back soon.
Love,
Mom
PS: I think something's wrong with Spike. He seemed depressed earlier. Check on him for me?"

Okay. So, Mom and sister accounted for. Now, where was Spike, and why was he depressed? She was about to get her jacket, and go out patroling, hoping to run into him, when she noticed a figure sitting on her back porch. She opened the door slowly, and saw that it was indeed Spike. Sitting on the back porch steps with his head in his hands. "Spike?"

He turned to her. There were no tears on his cheeks, but it was obvious that he'd been crying not too long ago. "Oh.. Spike," she whispered. "What's wrong?"

He shrugged. "Stupid. Don't wanna bother you." Turned back around.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No." Barely hidden sniff. She moved, sat next to him on the steps, and gently patted his back. He glanced over at her. "Really want to know?"

She gave him an encouraging smile. "Yeah."

"My.. This dog, I'd been feeding for the last couple of weeks... He's- It's dead. Car hit it. I found 'im earlier this evenin'. When you were out with your pals. I figured I'd do a little patrol, and there he was. Just... Flattened.." His voice cracked.

"Oh.." She didn't have words for this. The closest thing she could remember was when she was seven and her parakeet died. "Spike.. I'm sorry.."

He leaned toward her, and she took his cue, slipping an arm around his back and letting him lean his head on her shoulder. "...was probably fast, ya know?", he whispered. "St- He probably didn't suffer, from the looks of-" Swallow. "-what was left of him.."

She bit her lip, and held him to her, rubbing comforting circles on his back. Said quietly, "What was his name?"

He gave a watery chuckle. "Star. He was black. White star spot on his head."

"Do you.. Do you want to bury him?"

"Already did, luv. Thanks for offering."

She looked around. "Where?"

He pointed at the tree in the far end of the yard. "O'er there. He liked big trees.."

She looked at where he'd pointed. Sure enough, there was a small patch of freshly turned earth, but it was so well hidden between the fence and the tree that she probably never would've noticed it without him pointing it out to her. Chewed her lip. It was very unnoticable... "I'll be right back. Stay here, okay?"

He looked a little lost when she pulled away, so she leaned down and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead. "I'm coming right back, Spike. I promise. Just gonna get something."

She went into the house, and Spike just sat there, staring at the little mound. He hadn't even told anyone that he was sneaking food for the little dog. Not even Joyce. He'd been hoping to warm her up to the idea, and then maybe she'd let him keep the dog. He knew that convincing Niblet and Buffy would be easy, but he'd been working on Joyce for about a week now, without being obvious about it. And then this happened. Why couldn't he have just asked her? Just come right out and said that he was feeding a dog, and wanted to bring it inside? It was only a small dog. Which was why the driver of the car hadn't even seen him. Poor Star...

Buffy came back, with her hands behind her back, chewing her lip a little. She hoped he'd like what she'd done. "Spike. I'm back. I.. uh.. brought something. For Star's grave.." Held out the brick, into which she'd carved the name STAR in capital letters. He took the brick, and looked at her, obviously confused. She shrugged. "Just thought... He deserves a proper headstone, s'all."

Spike stood up, and pulled the Slayer into a tight hug, which she returned. "Thank you, luv. It's wonderful." He walked over, with Buffy right behind him, and gently pushed the brick, writing side up, into the soft ground. "Bye, Star," he whispered. "I won't forget you..."

Buffy pulled him to her when he started to sniffle again, was suprised to find that she was crying as well. She glanced down at the brick. She'd dulled down her favorite dagger to carve that, and was not the least bit sorry about it. A new dagger, she could get. Helping her boyfriend get through this loss was more important. Infinitely more important. She held him, rubbing his back gently. "Shh, Spike... I'm here. It's gonna be okay... I love you. I love you.."

===========================================================================================

=================
Chapter 10
The Flame Of Family
=================

~I hear the wind call your name,
The sound that leads me home again.
It sparks up the fire,
A flame that still burns.
To you, I will always return.~

Two months had passed since Buffy had told her friends about her relationship with Spike, and things had gotten considerably easier. Xander and Spike, well... No one would mistake them for the best of friends, that was sure. But it was.. Calm. Easy, between them. Early on, there'd been a few verbal battles, and even one thrown punch (on Xander's part, which Spike easily dodged), but things had calmed down after Spike had saved his life...

"Slayer! DUCK!" Buffy did as her boyfriend asked, just in time to avoid a claw swipe from a large, ugly grey thing. She rolled and came up in a fighting stance, having retrieved her dropped sword in mid roll. She swung almost blindly, her hair in her eyes, and managed to remove the creature's head in one swipe. Hurray for Slayer instinctive aim.

Not too far away, Spike was winning his own battle with one of the grey thing's nestmates. A quick snap of the neck, and it was dead. There'd been a third one, though. Where... There! The Slayer and vampire turned as one to charge at the third of the ugly grey triplets, which was at that moment attacking the rest of the Scoobies. Willow and Xander were attempting to keep it distracted while Giles tried to get a clean shot at it with his crossbow. Xander zigged when he should've zagged, and the thing hit him with a hard back hand (if you could call tenticles 'hands'), and sent him flying. Willow panicked and screamed Xander's name, giving the thing an oppertunity to slam her as well. Which it would've done, if Buffy hadn't leaped onto it's back at that very moment.

"Leave them alone, you ugly blob!", the Slayer shouted, hanging on as best she could to the creature's neck. "Come on! It's me you want!" A roar from the blobby grey thing was her only answer.

Spike carefully walked over to Xander, and had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. The boy was stuck. He was fine, and struggling, but his shirt was caught on the wings of a giant concrete angel. He spotted Spike as he kicked at the statue and muttered for it to let him go. Spike stared up at him, an amused look on his face. Xander snorted down at him. "I'm glad you find this funny, Evil Dead. Either help me down, or leave me alone. Don't just stand there."

Spike shrugged, and moved to walk away. "Suit yourself, mate."

Xander struggled for a moment, then reconsidered. "Wait. Spike, come on. The others are busy. Help me down, huh? I'll-" Nearly choked on the phrase. "-owe you one."

The vampire turned around, and cocked his head up at the human hanging from the statue. "You'll owe me, eh?" Gave a shrug. "I was gonna help you anyway, you know. But, since you've offered, I'll make a note of this."

Xander grumbled to himself about 'opening his big mouth', as Spike climbed up the statue on the opposite side from him. It took a moment, but Spike managed to untangle Xander's shirt from the statue's wing. For a moment, he was actually holding him up by his shirt before the boy managed to get a grip on the statue's arm and hang on. "Whew," he said quietly. "I knew I hated Angel for a good reason."

Spike chuckled. "Well, we have that in common, then." He started to climb back down the statue, and suddenly froze, listening. He reached out, and grabbed Xander's shirt, not allowing him to go any further down the statue. "Hang one a minute, Harris."

Xander pulled against the vampire's iron grip. "Hey, Dead-boy Junior, lemme go!"

At that moment, a stray crossbow bolt (one of Giles special ones with silver tips) embedded itself in the statue less than six inches below Xander. The boy froze as Spike released his shirt. "Now, you can go." Spike let go of the statue and dropped to the ground, then turned to walk away.

Xander stayed frozen for a moment, then scrambled down the statue and jogged to catch up with Spike. "You just saved my life."

"Yeah. And?"

Xander shook his head. "You aren't supposed to do that, Spike. I hate you. You hate me-"

"And Buffy loves you, Harris. I love Buffy. I don't want to see her hurt. And you bein' impaled on one of the Watcher's stray bolts would hurt her."

Xander nodded. "Oh. So you saved me for Buffy?"

"Yep."

Xander shook his head slowly. "Well, whyever you did it, thanks, man."

"You're welcome," Spike said, then cocked his head at the boy for a moment. "And 'whyever' isn't a word." Headed toward the others.

Xander snorted. "Oh, farbeit for me to refute the Unliving Dictionary."

============================================================================================

~I can't stand the distance.
I can't dream alone.
I can't wait to see you.
Yes I'm on my way home.

Cause everything I want,
Is everything that's here.
And when we're all together,
There's nothing to fear..~

A month after that, the whole group of Scoobies, Spike included, were at the Summers home for Thanksgiving dinner. Joyce, Buffy, Dawn, and Willow were in the kitchen. Spike would've prefered that he be included in the cooking, but Joyce had insisted that he stay in the living room with the boys. It was a Summers family tradition for the girls to cook. So, that's how Spike wound up watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade with Giles and Xander.

"Ooh! Look! The Budweiser Clydesdales!", Xander said excitedly.

Giles chuckled. "Really, Xander. You're worse than Dawn."

Spike sighed from his spot on the couch. "Is there anything else on? Anything at all?"

Giles shook his head. "No. Not really. And you know that Buffy would kill us if we changed the channel, anyway."

"Yeah," Xander said. "No messing with Summers traditions. Trust me. Last year, I tried to change the channel when Rudolph was on, and both Buffy *and* Dawn attacked me."

Spike shook his head. "They can be ruthless."

"Tell me about it."

Several hours and one huge meal later, everyone was spread out around the living room. Resting with bellies full of turkey, stuffing, and various other foods, and watching what was left of a football game. Well, the members of the group that were still awake were watching. Everyone else was asleep. By the time that the game was over, the whole group was sound asleep.

To Spike's suprise, at dinner, Giles had stood up and proposed a toast. To old and new friends, and special occasions. Like anniversaries. Spike had thought that everyone had forgotten, that no one would remember that Thanksgiving had been the day that he'd come to live with them, and set on the road to becoming one of the group. An official Scooby. He'd been wrong about them not remembering. And, according to everyone present at the dinner that night, he had officially gained 'Scooby' status. Buffy made a big show of presenting him with a Scooby-Doo keychain, identical to the ones that everyone else already had.

"Welcome to the Scoobies, Spike."

============================================================================================

Two weeks before Christmas, and Buffy was panicked. She hadn't done ANY of her shopping! None of it! Not one present! And now she and Spike were walking around the mall (him under protest) after agreeing to meet Xander and Willow in the food court in three hours. She glanced at her boyfriend. "So.. any ideas what you're getting everyone?"

Spike cocked his head. "Well, I was thinking of getting Red a copy of that new Dean Koontz novel she was lookin' at the other day. Rupert, I'm giving him an antique sword that I've been holding on to for years. I already got Joyce and Bit's gifts. And yours," he said with a grin.

"Ooh! Gimme a hint?"

"Nope."

She pouted. "Not even a little, teeny tiny hint?"

He chuckled. "No. Well.. I'll just tell you that you'll like it. But that's it."

She 'humph'ed. "Fine. Then I won't give you a hint either."

"You haven't gotten anything yet!"

"Well, when I do, I'm not telling you."

The went around the mall for the next three hours, and by the time they met the others, all were secure in their purchases. This was gonna be the best Christmas, ever.

==============================================================================================

~And wherever I wander,
The one thing I've learned.
It's to here I will always,
Always,
Return.~

Sounds of happy laughter and ripping paper rung through the Summers living room that Christmas morning. Dawn was the first to open her gifts. A new book from her favorite book series from Giles. A sweater from Willow. A couple of CDs from Xander. A copy of Beauty And The Beast (her old one had worn out), and a couple of new outfits from Joyce. A stuffed dolphin to add to her collection from Buffy, along with yet another CD. And finally, a giant stuffed Rhino (her favorite animal) from Spike. How he'd gotten that thing into the house, let alone wrapped and under the tree without anyone noticing, no one knew.

Willow went next, then Xander, Giles and Joyce, and the Buffy. She opened the three packages from her mom first. Two new outfits, three new movies, and a gift card from The Gap. Teenager heaven. Next, she opened the two packages from Giles. Ooh! A new crossbow! Count on her Watcher to be practical as well as sentimental. And the other package was a beautiful locket with a picture of Joyce on one side, and Dawn on the other. Giles told her it was to help keep family close to her heart. Willow and Xander had both chipped in to get Buffy a brand new chest for her room, since the other one had been destroyed in a rather unfortunate 'accident' earlier that month. Finally, she opened Spike's gift.

"Oh..", she said, her eyes getting wide. She pulled the jacket out of the box and held it up for everyone to see. A leather duster, in her size, identical to his except for the red velvet that lined the interior of hers. "Spike.. It's beautiful.."

The vampire shrugged a little, rather uncomfortable now that everyone's attention was on him. "I just thought.. You're always borrowin' mine, so this way you won't have to anymore." Chewed his lip for a moment. "Did you see what's in the pocket?"

Buffy turned the jacket around. "Pocket?"

"The interior pocket."

"Oh." She flipped the duster slightly inside out, and gasped as she pulled a beautifully carved stake from the pocket. It was longer than her normal, throw away ones, and it was customized. At the top of it, there was a design that represented a solar eclipse. The union of night and day. Her name had been carved into the sun side, and Spike's into the moon side. Below it, there was a small metal plate that had the words 'Love Is Forever' engraved into it. "Spike.. I don't.. I don't know what to say.. It's wonderful. No one's ever done anything like this for me." She leaned across the couch and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I love it. I love you. Thank you, Spike."

If it had been possible, the vampire would've blushed. "Yeah, well.. I felt bad about you losin' Mr. Pointy, and just thought-"

"This is better than Mr. Pointy, Spike." She smiled at him, and he fidgeted uncomfortably as the others exchanged grins.

Dawn shoved the remaining packages toward him. "These're yours, Spike. It's your turn to open."

Spike looked at the little pile of gifts. "What?"

Buffy looked at him and laughed. "Let me give you a hint. You take your hands, and use them to remove the paper, then hold up what someone gave you and smile. Got it?"

Spike shook his head. "You all got me stuff?"

Joyce moved to sit on Spike's other side and patted his back gently. "You're a part of the family, William. Of course we got you presents."

There was a chorus of nods and 'yeah's all around the room. Then Xander spoke up. "Come on, Spike. You're supposed to open them on Christmas, not wait until New Years."

With one last disbelieving glance around the room, Spike picked up a small package. The tag identified it as being from Willow. He started to open it carefully, trying not to rip the paper, but then he began to get excited as the reality of what was happening hit him, and the paper came off in shreds. Willow had gotten him an original copy of Alice In Wonderland. As in, the actual book. Spike held the old volume and looked to Willow. "It's.. It's my favorite book. How did you know?"

Willow chewed her lip and shrugged. "You quoted it once. A few months ago. And Buffy told me that you don't have much of your own stuff down in the basement, so I thought I'd add to your library. I'm glad you like it."

The next gift was from Giles. A collection of song books, old and new. "Rupert.. Thank you.. How..?"

The Watcher smiled. "Buffy told me you had Dawn's old keyboard in your room. I thought you might like to have something to play on it."

Spike grinned, and set the song books on top of the copy of Alice In Wonderland, then reached for the next gift. From Xander. He cocked his head at the boy. "Nothing's gonna jump out of here and stake me, right, Harris?"

Xander laughed. "Aw, come on, man. Don't you trust me?"

Spike chuckled and ripped the paper. Grinned at the contents of the package. Held it up. "Xander has seen fit to give me a very interesting educational film." It was Interview With The Vampire. Everyone laughed.

Dawn had gotten him a small portable CD player. "So you won't bug me for mine anymore," she joked as he opened the package.

Joyce gave Spike several shirts. Colored shirts. Colors besides red, black, and white. One dark blue, one deep purple, and one a light blue that would bring out his eyes when he wore it. He hugged her in thanks, then turned to open his final gift. From Buffy.

The Slayer fidgeted in her seat. "It's not as.. expensive and stuff as what you got me. I hope you like it."

Spike smiled at her, and opened the package. A brand new, leather bound notebook, with the name 'William "Spike" Edwards Jr.' in gold leaf on the cover. He picked it up slowly, reverently. Looked to Buffy with wide, and slightly watery eyes. "Luv.. I love it. How did you ever find something like this?"

She shrugged. "The specialty stationary shop at the mall. It came in like three days ago. Barely had enough time to wrap it before today, with everything else, you know." Looked at him shyly. "It's for poetry. Or songs, or anything you want to write. I think it's alot better than those old ratty notebooks of ours that you've been using."

He'd found a stash of Buffy and Dawn's old schoolwork in the basement, and with Joyce's permission (provided that he saved everything he tore out) had been using the blank pages at the back for his compositions. Now, he had something much better. "Buffy.. I don't know what to say. No one's ever done anything like this for me before. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

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That night, as Spike stretched out on his bed, in his room, for he no longer thought of it as 'Buffy's basement', with his gifts carefully arranged within easy reach, he realized something. Home wasn't just where you are. Wasn't just where you exist. Home is people. Home is family. And now, for the first time in over a century, Spike could truly say that he *was* home.

~It's to *you*
I will always,
Always,
Return~

THE END
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