Chapter 12:

A doctor walked down the hospital corridor toward the waiting room with a sullen expression on his face. He headed toward the group of people seated on a row of chairs. They had fear in their eyes as the doctor approached them. He looked upon their faces and reflected on the fact that this was the only time he ever truly hated his job.

"I'm sorry." The doctor spoke softly. "We did all that we could to help her but unfortunately it wasn't enough. She passed away a few minutes ago. I'm so sorry."

Tears rolled down flushed cheeks and Spike watched the tragedy from a distance and silently prayed that neither he nor Buffy's other friends and family would have to suffer that same fate.

His heart cried out for the group of people across from him that just found out they lost a loved one forever. He knew all too well how that felt. He lost Buffy once and he didn't want to lose her again.

Spike had called the entire gang and had them come to the hospital after he had rushed Buffy there. He noticed she still had a faint heartbeat and got her there as fast as he could. He just hoped that it was fast enough.

Willow walked over to Spike and took a seat next to him. She started gently rubbing his back.

"How are you doing?" She asked him in a worried tone.

"Terrible." He replied. "I can't stand sitting here. I hate all the waiting. I hate that all we can do is sit here and do nothing. My stomach is in knots."

Willow continued to rub circles on his back.

"I'm sure we'll hear something soon." She tried to reassure him. "In fact, Dawn went downstairs to give blood as soon as she got here. She knew Buffy would probably need it after you described what happened to her."

Spike slumped forward and put his head in his hands.

"This is all my fault."

"How can you say that?" Willow asked.

"I should have known sooner. I should have been able to stop that demon. I could have saved her."

"There was no way you could have known. She was lucky that you got there when you did."

Spike lifted his head and looked into Willow's eyes.

"We had a fight after you left. She pushed me away when I tried to put my arms around her. I told her I didn't want to hide anymore. I didn't want her being ashamed of me. I told her she had to make up her mind and decide what she really wanted. She was probably on her way to see me when it happened. In fact, I'm sure she was coming to see me. What have I done? What if I lose her again?" Spike said with tears in his eyes.

"You're not going to lose her." Willow said with a determined expression. "Buffy is the strongest person I have ever known. She will make it through this. You have to stop blaming yourself."

"Do you know what the last thing she said to me was?" Spike asked.

Willow shook her head.

"She told me she loved me right before she passed out." Spike confided.

Willow's heart sank. Buffy had finally told him how she really feels but in the worst way she could possibly imagine.

"I screwed everything up. I couldn't stop her from getting hurt last time and I failed this time too. I'm good for nothing." Spike said in a harsh tone while pulling at his hair.

"Spike stop that!" Willow yelled. "Stop talking like she's already dead! We are NOT going to lose another part of this group!"

"I just wish there was something more I could have done." Spike admitted in a calmer tone.

"I know. Don't you think I feel that way every time I think about Tara? I wished so many times that I could have known about Warren ahead of time or that I could have pushed her out of the way of that bullet so she didn't get hurt. Do you know how many times I have wished that it were me that got shot instead of her? She didn't deserve that. She was the greatest person I have ever known and she should be here with us right now but she's not and I can't understand why!" Tears were now streaming down Willow's cheeks and she was fighting to catch her breath.

"I wake up every morning, roll over in bed and expect her to be there." Willow continued. "Sometimes I try and convince myself that she just got up before I did to make me breakfast. I try to imagine that she's still in my life and that she's going to walk in the door any minute and serve me breakfast in bed. But I have to eventually come to my senses and when I do it's like I lose her all over again. Is this pain ever going to go away? Is it ever going to get better?"

Tears were now streaming down Spike's face and he turned to hug Willow with all his might.

Willow finally settled down a bit. She took a deep breath and pulled back from Spike.

"I don't know how to live without her." Willow admitted softly.

"Willow, I'm so sorry." Spike said. "You're right. Tara didn't deserve to die. Not one of you deserves the hell that life has handed you but you have to keep on living. Things will get better. I promise. You're a good person who deserves to be happy and I'm sure someday fate will intervene and make sure that you are."

Silence filled the air between them for a moment. Spike looked down at his hands as if embarrassed. "Thank you Willow, for being such a good friend to me. I don't think I've ever had a friend like you before. Buffy is lucky to have you. The time I have spent with you has really helped. My nightmares and visions are less frequent now. I've learned to handle them better when they do come. I'm actually starting to feel normal. Well, as normal as a vampire with a soul can feel anyway. I just want you to know how much I appreciate all your help."

Willow leaned over and kissed Spike on the cheek.

"Thank you." She said. "Buffy is really lucky to have you too."

"I'm not so sure about that." Spike said.

"Well, I am and when Buffy gets better and I know she will, just remember not to let the petty things make you fight anymore. The one thing I learned from Tara's loss is that you have to enjoy every moment you have with the people you love. Don't let stupid meaningless problems tear you apart."

A doctor suddenly appeared before them and Spike looked at him with pure terror in his eyes. He was scared to death at what the doctor might say. The rest of the gang walked over to where the doctor was now standing.

"Are you here for Buffy Summers?" the doctor asked.

"Yeah." Spike replied. "Is she going to be ok?"

"Yes, Buffy is going to be just fine. That is one strong girl you've got there. She lost a lot of blood so we supplied her with the blood that her sister had donated for her. Fortunately, none of her internal organs were hit or damaged. She's going to need a lot of time to heal but she will be fine." The doctor smiled.

Everyone breathed a deep sigh of relief and Spike lunged forward and started hugging the doctor.

Spike pulled back from him and wiped tears away from his eyes.

"Sorry." Spike said. "That's just the best news I've gotten in my life."

"It's understandable." The doctor said. "She was lucky you were there in time to bring her here. You saved her life."

Spike was startled at what the doctor had said. He hadn't thought of it that way. He just kept blaming himself instead but he felt good knowing that he finally did what he wasn't able to do that fateful night on the tower when Buffy was forced to jump to save her sister and the world.

"She did regain consciousness but she is sleeping right now. However, you can visit her if you'd like." The doctor offered.

"Thanks." Spike said and he watched the doctor walk away before he turned to face everyone around him.

Dawn ran up to Spike and wrapped her arms around him while tears of joy fell from her eyes.

"Thank God she's ok." Dawn cried.

She pulled away from Spike and wiped away her happy tears.

Xander walked toward Spike and put one arm across his shoulders.

"Why don't you go and see her. I'm sure she'll want to talk to you." Xander said kindly.

Spike walked toward her hospital room and he took a deep breath as he reached the door. He walked in and was surprised to see how much color had returned to her once pale face. She was still sleeping and he didn't have the heart to try and wake her. She needed to rest.

Spike took a seat in the chair next to her bed and stayed beside her to watch her sleep. After about a half an hour Dawn came in to check on them and noticed that she was still sleeping. She told him that she and the rest of the gang were going to leave and come back tomorrow after she's had more rest.

He stayed beside her for another hour until he started to drift off to sleep himself. He tried to stop himself from dozing off but it became an impossible task to accomplish. His eyes kept fluttering closed and he continued to fight to keep them open.

Suddenly he heard Buffy stir, his eyes snapped open and he was suddenly wide-awake. He watched her and waited for her to open her eyes.

Buffy's eyes slowly opened and she turned her head to see Spike sitting in the chair next to her.

"Hey." Buffy greeted with a tender smile.

"Welcome back luv." Spike smiled and stood up.

He walked over to the side of Buffy's hospital bed and stood beside her. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

He started to back away but she stopped him by grabbing his hand and holding on to it.

"I'm glad you're here." Buffy said as she gave his hand a squeeze.

"How are you feeling?" Spike asked.

"A bit tired but much better. They gave me pain medication so it doesn't hurt quite as much." Buffy explained.

There was a short pause and then Buffy tilted her head up and looked into Spike's eyes.

"I want you to know that I remember what I said to you and I don't want you to think that I said it only because I thought I was going to die. I love you, Spike and I should have told you sooner. I just was so afraid that I'd missed my chance again."

"What do you mean missed your chance?" Spike inquired.

"When Warren shot me, I remember lying on the ground with a bullet in my chest. I was in such pain and all these memories came flooding back to me as I lay there. It was like I was so close to death that my life literally flashed before my eyes and in the end all I ended up thinking of was you. I admit I was using you at first but I did have feelings for you that I was trying so hard to deny. Those feelings grew so much stronger each time we were together. All I could think of was that I missed my chance to tell you how I really felt. It was more than lust and passion. I cared about you."

Spike pulled up the chair closer to her bed and took a seat without ever letting go of her hand. He never thought he'd hear her say those words and truly mean them. Buffy telling him that she loved him was his greatest wish. He just hoped she would still fell that way after doing what he was about to do.

"I love you so much Buffy. I was horrified that I'd lose you again." Spike admitted.

"I'm leaving town for a little while." Spike continued. "I know this is a bad time but there's something I really need to do. I just wanted to make sure you were going to be all right before I left."

"Where are you going? When will you be back?" Buffy asked in utter confusion.

"Where I'm going isn't important but I will be back as soon as I can. It shouldn't take more than a week or two. There's a chance that you'll decide against being with me when I get back, and if you do, I just want you to know that I'll understand."

"Spike you're scaring me." Buffy said in a shaking voice.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to scare you. I don't want you worrying about me. I'm going to be fine. I just need you to take care of yourself while I'm gone. Don't worry yourself about what I'm doing just concentrate on healing and getting better. I love you."

Spike leaned down slowly and kissed her lips gently. He reluctantly let go of Buffy's hand and headed for the door.

"Spike! Wait!" Buffy exclaimed.

Spike didn't stop and just continued to walk away from her. He knew if he turned back that he might not be able to go through with this. He knew he had to leave now when Buffy wasn't able to try and stop him.



Spike walked into the darkness of the dank and familiar cave. He flicked open his lighter to shed some light before him. It felt strange to him. It felt like going back in time. He'd never thought that he would have to come back here.

Bright green and glowing eyes appeared out of the shadows and glared at Spike

"So I see you've returned, vampire." The demon spoke in a deep and harsh voice.

"That's right." Spike replied. "I wanna make a deal."

To Be Continued......
 

Chapter 13:

"So you want to make a deal, vampire? I usually don't make deals." The demon said harshly.

"But there's something I need." Spike explained.

"I understand but no one has ever had the nerve to return a second time. Although, not many have survived my tests to be able to return."

"I survived." Spike said proudly with his chin up. "I did quite well and if you give me what I want, you'll never have to see me again."

"You do understand, vampire that If I accept your deal, you will have to go through my trials once again and this time they will be even more difficult to conquer." The demon said with his green eyes glowing brightly.

"I get it. I can handle anything you throw at me."

"Very well. Since you did so well with the trials last time, I will grant you another chance to get what you need. However, this is the last time so you better make sure it's worth it. Stay alive and I will grant your request. Are you still sure that you want to go through with this?" The demon asked and waited patiently for Spike's response.

"I'm sure. I need to do this." Spike replied. "Now, let's get this over with."



"I can't wait to get out of here." Buffy said as she violently started throwing her belongings into her duffel bag.

"At least you only had to stay 4 days." Willow replied. "I thought the doctor was gonna pass out when he saw how quickly you healed. He called you a 'medical miracle' when he looked at your scar."

"I know. I just told him that I got lucky this time by healing so quickly. It's not like I could tell him that it was my amazing slayer healing power that did the job. I'm just thrilled that I can finally go home. These four days have felt like a month to me." Buffy groaned.

Buffy walked around her hospital room in search of the rest of her things. She looked in the closet once more and checked the drawers, which she slammed closed so hard that Willow knew there was something bothering her.

"Buffy what's wrong?" Willow asked. "You seem so angry."

Buffy stopped cleaning out the room and sighed deeply.

"It's just...it's Spike." Buffy admitted

"What about Spike? Did you have another fight again?"

"No. He left again." Buffy said in an irritated tone.

"Left? Left where?"

"That's the thing. I have no idea. He wouldn't even tell me. He just took off knowing that I couldn't chase after him. I can't believe he did this to me just when things were starting to get better between us." Buffy said, her voice wavering.

"Do you know why he left?" Willow asked sympathetically.

"No." Buffy sighed again. "He just said that there was something he needed to do."



The green-eyed demon led Spike toward a door within the cave. It looked so out of place within the darkness of the cold and damp cave. It was a huge white door placed within a wall of jagged rocks.

"In this room is where the trials will take place," explained the demon. "The entire test will consist in this room only. In the end, when I return, if you are still alive I will give you what you came for."

The demon opened the door and Spike walked toward the threshold. He ducked his head inside the room to see nothing but white throughout it. The floor and ceiling was white as well as the walls, which were padded. It resembled a room in the hospital made especially for mental patients.

"What the bleeding hell am I supposed to do in here?" Spike questioned.

The demon did not answer him. Instead, he pushed Spike inside and slammed the door closed. Spike heard the door lock behind him.



Buffy returned to the comforts of home. She walked in the door and dropped her duffel bag to the floor.

"Finally!" She exclaimed as she walked over toward the couch and collapsed onto it.

She took in the comfort of the couch and stared up at the window while she thought of Spike. She wondered where he could have run off to. She wondered what the big secret was. After all she had told him and after all they had just been through, how could he leave her like this again? He had told her not to worry but how could she not? He takes off to some mystery destination without any explanation except for a vague time limit of how long he would be gone.

"Get out of my head!" Buffy yelled out loud to an empty house.

She wanted to be alone for a while so left Dawn to hang out with Willow after they had dropped her off. She had a hard time trying to assure them that she would be fine by herself but they eventually got the point that she just didn't feel like having company.

She was so frustrated with herself that she couldn't stop thinking about Spike. He wouldn't leave her thoughts no matter how hard she tried to get rid of him. It was actually ironic because he'd entered her thoughts just like he had entered her life. Even when she wanted him to leave her alone, he would always find an excuse to be around her. Now that she actually wanted Spike around he decides to do a disappearing act. Why isn't she surprised?

She got up off the sofa and headed upstairs to her room. The only way she could clear her mind is if she crawled into her warm comfortable bed and drifted off to sleep. Although something told her that even in sleep she wouldn't be able to get rid of Spike. She would just end up dreaming about him.

She opened her closet door to find something more comfortable to change into. She groaned loudly when she spotted Spike's leather duster, which was still hanging in her closet. She was surprised that he had never asked for it back. She would have returned it but so much has happened since he came back and she had so much on her mind that she had just completely forgot about the coat that he could never seem to live without.

She took the black duster off of the hanger and wrapped it around her body just as she had done before Spike had returned. She lay back in bed with the duster once again wrapped around her small form and continued to miss him all over again.



Spike looked around the bright white room wondering when his tests were going to begin. He couldn't figure out what kind of torture could possibly befall him in such a small ordinary room.

He suddenly heard an extremely loud humming noise. It sounded like a giant motor but he couldn't figure out where it was coming from. He was starting to think that he had been tricked and was just being held prisoner because it had been a few hours already with no sign of the trials the demon spoke of.

The motor continued to hum and he started getting nervous. He spun around and observed the room once more and waited for some beast to jump out at him. He had no idea what to expect.

Spike felt a burning pain on his arm and noticed wisps of smoke rising up in the air. He realized that his arm was beginning to start on fire. He lifted his head and glanced up at the ceiling where a panel had opened up to let in the morning sun. He quickly moved his arm away before any flames had appeared on his skin.

He ran into a darkened corner to get away from the sun but the first panel closed and another one had opened right above him letting in more sunshine. He ran to the opposite side of the room to try and escape the light once again.

He continued to run around the room and into the padded walls on all sides to try and escape the sunlight coming from above him as panel after panel opened and tried to burn him.

He quickly and successfully dodged the beams of sunlight. He sped gracefully away from certain death as he mentally assumed that this test was almost over. He was proved wrong as he felt a burning on his skin once again and looked around the room to notice that sprinkler heads were peaking out of the padded walls spraying him with holy water.

Spike ran, dodged and jumped around the white room continuously to avoid bursting into flames. This continued for another half an hour until Spike was so weary that he thought his muscles would collapse from exhaustion.

All the panels finally closed and the sprinkler heads hid within the padded walls. Spike huddled in a corner trying to find at least an ounce of strength that he still had within him. His weary muscles could barely move so he continued to crouch in the corner and lean his body against the wall.

Spike was terrified that this wasn't the end. He didn't think he could take anymore of the demon's tests since he could barely move.

The door opened and Spike stood on shaky legs. The demon looked inside the room and an evil grin spread across its face as he noticed the exhausted condition that Spike was in.

"There is one more test you need to pass, vampire." The demon said smugly.

He shoved the monster through the door toward Spike and a low and evil laugh escaped the glowing-eyed demon's throat.

"I believe you've met before." The demon stated before he closed the door, leaving Spike alone with the monster.

Slithering before him was the Lorac demon that Buffy had fought against in the cemetery surrounding his crypt.

The Lorac demon slid toward Spike, trying to pierce his skin with its sharp blades. Spike quickly moved to the side and just barely missed getting sliced into.

The black snake-like demon hissed at him and made a swift move toward Spike cutting into his leg through his black jeans.

Spike howled in pain as blood rolled down his leg onto his bare foot. A round pool of blood formed and added color to the gleaming white floor below him.

Spike thought about the chance that he may actually lose this fight and suddenly felt a new found strength coursing through his veins. The thought of not being able to return to Buffy was more than he could stand. Through Buffy he had finally found the power within himself to be ready for this fight.

Spike spun around and kicked the monster with all his might and watched it fly against the wall with a loud thud. It barely phased the monster and it flew toward Spike once again and tried to slice through his midsection. Spike ducked as he saw it coming toward him. He grabbed onto it's huge tail and flipped it onto the ground. With every ounce of strength he could muster, Spike grabbed onto one of his sword-like arms and snapped it in two. Despite the pain that was now in his hands and the blood that ran down them toward his wrists, he copied the same maneuver and snapped its second sword in half as well.

The huge snake monster cried out in pain and Spike watched as its arms flailed around wildly trying to cut into his legs with the short unsharpened stubs that it had left.

Spike bent over and reached out toward the demon's head with bloodied hands. He wrapped his hands around its neck and squeezed with forceful pressure. Spike twisted its neck until he heard the satisfying crunch of death.

Spike stood up and looked down at his blood filled body. He panted tiredly despite the fact that he was among the undead and had no real need to take a breath.

The door opened and the green-eyed demon stood there and scanned the scene before him.

"I'm impressed, vampire. No one before you has ever made it through these set of tests."

"So that's it then?" Spike asked. "If we're all finished here can I get what I came for so I can get the bleeding hell away from you and this cave for good."

"Yes. Since you have passed, I will follow through with our deal. I will allow you to trade your soul!"

To Be Continued....

 

Chapter 14:

Buffy sat at the table in the Magic Box feeling depressed, angry and utterly confused. Two weeks had passed and Spike still hadn't returned. She should have known that something like this would happen. She tells him she loves him and then he takes off. It seems that's the story of her life. She should have known better than to fall in love again. After all, a pattern had formed in her life in which every man she loved ended up leaving her. Why should he be any different? How could she be so stupid?

Buffy looked across the table where Xander and Anya were sitting. They were looking at the bridal magazines that Anya would force Xander to read on a daily basis. After leaving her at the alter he figured the least he could do was go along with her detailed planning which involved over a dozen wedding catalogs.

"Uh guys, I really hate to break up the wedding bliss but I really do need help researching about this Lorac demon. I don't want to get kabobed again." Buffy said.

"Sorry Buff." Xander said. "Anya just wanted to look for last minute wedding ideas."

"But isn't the wedding tomorrow? What could you possibly find in any of those magazines that you could accomplish in one day?" Buffy let out an exaggerated sigh.

"There's no need to get huffy." Anya said, putting the magazine away. "You can never be too prepared. I just want everything to be perfect. You'll understand someday when you get married."

Buffy frowned and turned back to her research. She knew because she was the slayer that she would probably never get the chance to have a wedding or to do any of those traditional things that the average person does. Maybe that's why she finally accepted her relationship with Spike. She did love him even though it was far from a normal conventional relationship.

After all this time she finally realized how true his feelings for her were. She knew deep in her heart that he would risk his own life to protect her. Her life had an expiration date and she knew that Spike would constantly look after her to make sure they got to have as much time together as they possibly could. That's why his leaving had hurt her so much. She had been so close to death but he left anyway. She was angry that he had left her lying in the hospital alone but at the same time she was afraid. She was worried that he hadn't returned yet and terrified that something horrible had happened to him that prevented him from returning.

Willow sat at the counter researching the demon for Buffy. She tried to concentrate but she couldn't help but be worried about Spike too. She saw how torn up he was after Buffy was hurt. He was so terrified that he would lose her again. She couldn't understand what could possibly be so important that he would leave her when she needed him the most. Buffy was in pain and needed to be nurtured and cared for by him but he just took off without any explanation.

Willow knew Spike well enough by now to know that he wouldn't have left her like that unless it was an emergency of some sort. There was no way he would have left unless it was a life or death situation, which worried her even more. She just hoped that Spike was all right. He became such a good friend to her that she was starting to miss him too.

Every head in the Magic Box turned toward the door as they heard the sound of the bell announcing that someone was entering.

Buffy's eyes widened when she saw a battered Spike walk through the door. She wasn't sure if she should go to him to tend to his wounds first and ask questions later or if she should walk angrily toward him to demand an explanation.

She started to head toward him when she noticed that he continued to hold the door open as if he were waiting for someone else to join them.

Buffy paused and she stared in confusion. Willow stood up from her seat at the counter to try and get a closer look at what was going on.

Willow gasped loudly as the person Spike was waiting for finally decided to make an appearance.

"Tara?" Willow looked at her as if she didn't believe her eyes.

Willow didn't believe it. Her mind wouldn't let her process the information. She was convinced that she was hallucinating or just having another one of her wonderful dreams.

Xander and Anya stood and studied Tara closely as if they were trying to make sure that they weren't hallucinating as well.

Willow walked slowly and cautiously toward Tara as if she were afraid that if she moved too fast Tara would just disappear before her very eyes.

Willow stood in front of Tara and looked into her eyes which were as full of love as she remembered.

"Hi sweetie." Tara greeted with a smile.

Willow was stunned at the sound of her voice. It gave her some confirmation that she was actually there. She was sure she was going crazy. How could this be possible?

Willow brushed her hand against Tara's cheek to prove to herself even further that this was actually real. Tara leaned into her touch and smiled. Willow gasped at the feeling of her warm skin. She was really there. She had come back to her. She was alive.

"What happened? How did this happen? How are you here?" Willow asked, her eyes filling with tears.

"It was Spike." Tara answered, then glanced over at him. "He brought me back."

Tears of joy started to fall down Willow's flushed cheeks. She attempted to calm down and catch her breath. She couldn't get over the fact that the one thing she wanted the most in this world was actually happening.

Willow ran up to Spike and wrapped her arms around him. She sobbed into his chest and he slowly lifted his arms around her and started patting her back.

"Thank you!" Willow cried. "But, How?"

"I went back to Africa to see the same demon who gave me my soul." Spike answered.

"But that's impossible. After you told me about getting your soul back, I did some research on that demon. I read that you are only allowed one thing from him. How is it possible that you were granted a second wish?" Willow asked with a bewildered expression.

"I already knew about that before I left for Africa." Spike admitted. "I offered him a deal. I had to pass another set of tests and if I did, I would trade my soul for Tara's life. Obviously I passed. By the way, I see you have the books out. If you are researching about the Lorac demon there's no need to worry. Killing that monster was part of my tests and I couldn't have been happier to do it."

"You gave up your soul for me?" Tara asked in a shocked and bewildered tone.

She never knew the exact details of how she was able to be there. Tara was touched beyond words by Spike's actions. He was the last person she ever expected to do something so completely selfless for her or anyone else.

"Well, yeah." Spike replied. "You didn't deserve to get killed by that wanker and Willow didn't deserve to lose you."

"Did you pull her out of heaven like Willow did to Buffy? We all saw how well that turned out. This could be bad." Anya said.

Willow turned to Tara with a frightened expression on her face. No matter how much she wanted Tara back, she didn't want her to be as unhappy as Buffy was about being taken out of heaven.

"Don't worry sweetie." Tara said and she smoothed back a lock of Willow's red hair. "I'm not upset. He did pull me out of heaven but any heaven is pure hell if you're not with me. I would have given up anything to be back here with you."

Willow cupped Tara's face with her hands and started placing soft kissed over every inch of her face while tears escaped from her eyes.

"All right Spike. What's the deal here?" Xander said. "What's in this for you? You would never do something like this without getting something out of the deal."

Willow angrily turned to Xander gave him a look that scared him more than seeing her expression right before she killed Warren.

"I can't believe you Xander!" Willow screamed. "Spike is getting nothing out of this! He sacrificed his soul to bring Tara back to me. His soul, Xander! The soul that he left Sunnydale to get so he could be a better man for Buffy! Giving up his soul must have been the scariest thing he's ever had to do and he did it without knowing if Buffy would still want to be with him when he got back! That is the most unselfish thing I have ever seen anyone do!"

Xander lowered his head in shame knowing that Willow was right. He was happy and touched in his own way by what Spike had done. He realized that he was just searching for some reason to make him look bad mostly because he didn't want to have to admit that he had been wrong about Spike all along.

Buffy looked over at Spike still expecting him to go completely evil and decide to kill her and all her friends. She just couldn't bring herself to accept the fact that there was a gray area when it came to demons. After Angel lost his soul he became a pure evil that she had never seen before. For the longest time she compared every vampire to the way Angel was and always assumed that each one held the same evil that Angelus had. She realized how wrong she was as she watched the sweet and tender smile on Spike's face as he watched Willow and Tara engage in a loving embrace.

Spike looked over at Buffy to see an unsure expression on her face. He had no idea how she would react. Part of him was expecting her to run up to him with a stake in her hand and dust him now that his soul was gone. The other part of him was silently wishing that it wouldn't make a difference to her.

Buffy suddenly started running toward him and his first instinct was to duck out of the way in fear of meeting the pointy end of a stake but he stayed put instead. Buffy reached Spike and wrapped her arms around him, almost knocking him to the floor. She placed the most passionate kiss he had ever felt upon his lips. She pulled away from him and stared into his sparkling blue eyes.

"I never thought I would ever meet anyone as wonderful as you! I love you, Spike." Buffy said, then continued to kiss him with all the love she had.

Spike pulled away from her and Buffy stared at him with her brow furrowed in confusion. She suddenly had the disturbing thought that maybe something had changed when he lost his soul. Maybe he didn't love her anymore.

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked while looking at his baffled expression.

"I didn't think you would want to be with me anymore. I knew how important having a soul was to you. You made that point perfectly clear to me last year. What made you change your mind?"

"Spike, I loved you before you got your soul. I just didn't want to admit it to myself or to my friends." Buffy admitted as she looked around the room at the friends she had always considered being her family.

"After what happened with Angel, I couldn't deal with the fact that I could actually fall in love with someone who had no soul." Buffy continued. "I was convinced that there was something terribly wrong with me. I thought that loving someone without a soul meant that I was a bad person no matter how many times I saved the world. I realize now that not everything is black and white or good and evil. You disprove everything I've ever known about vampires and demons. You are one of the greatest people I have ever met even without a soul and it scares me how little that makes sense."

"Does that mean you forgive me?" Spike chuckled.

"I'll always forgive you." Buffy sighed happily.

Spike smiled in recognition of the words that he had once said to her.

" I can't believe the one person I feel that I can trust with my life is a vampire." Buffy laughed.

Spike could have shouted in celebration at her words. He couldn't believe that she finally trusted him. He knew that she could never love without trust. It felt amazing to feel the love that he had for Buffy finally returned to him. He grabbed Buffy and held her close to him as happy tears fell down his cheeks.

"Come on. Let's go home." Willow said to her friends as she continued to hold Tara close. "We've got a wedding to attend tomorrow."

To Be Continued......

 

Chapter 15:

Willow woke up in a daze. It was one of those mornings where you had to search your mind to remember you own identity. She opened her sleepy eyes half way and suddenly everything came flooding back to her. Tara was back. She blindly reached over to the other side of the bed to put her arm around Tara but all she felt was the empty sheet covered mattress next to her. Willow bolted upright in a panic. Was it only a dream? Was her mind playing tricks on her? Please don't let this be happening again. She took a deep breath and when she inhaled the wonderfully familiar scent of lavender, she knew it was for real. Tara had come back to her and the wonderful moment they shared had actually happened. Her dreams had come true.

"Good morning sleepy head." Tara greeted with a tray of food in hand.

It all still seemed so unreal. Willow had to pinch herself numerous times to let herself know that this was actually her life and not a dream. She watched Tara place a tray filled with chocolate chip pancakes down on a TV tray next to Willow's side of the bed. As she studied Tara, she struggled to fight back tears from the feeling of happiness that overwhelmed her. She has been so miserable for so long without Tara that she never thought she could ever feel this happy again.

"Yummy! Choclolatey goodness!" Willow exclaimed as she grabbed a fork and took a bite of Tara's delicious cooking. "But do you know what I'd like even better?"

"What?"

"Some major Tara snuggling." Willow replied.

"Tara snuggling? I don't know if I ever told you this but that just happens to be my most favorite Olympic event." Tara smiled. "However, we should get a move on. After all, we do have a wedding to get ready for."

Willow just looked at her and pouted with cute puppy dog eyes.

"Oh all right." Tara gave in. "I never could resist that pouty mouth and those sad eyes. But just for a few minutes ok. Anya will kill us if we're late."

Tara climbed back into bed and Willow put her arms around her and rested her head upon her chest with a content sigh. Tara placed a kiss on the top of Willow's head.

"Everything will be fine." Willow replied. "I'm sure she'll understand."



"Where have you been!" Anya screamed. "You should have been here half an hour ago! I need help with my dress!" Anya continued to mumble about how hard it is to find good help these days.

Willow and Tara found the whole scene amusing and glanced at each other with sly grins.

Buffy walked in and smiled at the sight of Willow and Tara in their matching bright red brides maid dresses. They weren't quite as grotesque as the green ones Anya picked out last time but the color was so bright that she wasn't able to stare directly at it for a long period of time.

"Buffy! It's about time you got here!" Anya said, now transferring her anger over to Buffy. "I need help with my vows and my dress. I've been waiting forever for someone to show up. You could at least be on time considering the fact that you have the great honor of being my maid of honor."

"Anya calm down." Buffy said with a roll of the eyes. "I got here on time. I was just helping Xander because Giles isn't here yet."

"Oh. I guess that's ok then. At least you have an excuse. These two don't even have that." Anya said while pointing to Willow and Tara, who were so mesmerized by each other, that they didn't seem to hear a word Anya had said.

Willow finally looked over at Buffy with a smile.

"Oh hey Buffy! Did you come here with Spike?"

"Yes I did. He's around here somewhere." Buffy answered.

"Wow! So this is like a big deal." Tara said. "Usually when you bring a date to a wedding it usually means it's pretty serious."

"It is serious." Buffy smiled. "I wouldn't bring just anyone to a wedding. It must be love."

Willow ran up to Buffy and wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug.

"Oh Buffy I'm so happy for you. He's the one. I just know it. Things are gonna change for you. This time it's gonna work out."

"I hope so." Buffy said. "But I've got to get back to Xander. With Giles missing in action he's in there all alone and we wouldn't want to give him the chance to run off again."

"What?" Anya said with panic in her voice.

"Relax Anya. It was just a joke." Buffy said. "Ok it was a bad joke. Sorry. But I really should get back to him. I'll come back later."

Buffy walked into Xander's room to find Dawn in there with him. He was trying to tie his tie in front of the mirror. He turned around when he noticed Buffy's reflection. He looked at her with a completely worried expression and Buffy became instantly afraid that he was about to chicken out again and run off.

"Xander what's wrong?" Buffy asked nervously.

Xander was about to speak when Dawn cleared her throat and decided to give the bad news to Buffy herself.

"Um, Xander is freaking out because Giles can't make it. His flight was cancelled due to bad weather." Dawn said.

"Now I don't have a best man and Anya is going to freak out." Xander finished.

Buffy walked up to Xander and started to tie his tie for him.

"Calm down Xander, it's not the end of the world. Why don't you just ask Spike to be your best man?" Buffy suggested.

"Spike? You want me to ask Spike?"

"Well, yeah, why not?"

"Spike isn't exactly best man material, Buffy." Xander replied. "And in case you haven't noticed, we're not exactly the best of friends."

"I know but don't you think it's about time you gave him a chance. After all that has happened, can't you at least try to be civil? Besides, who else are you going to ask on such short notice?"

"Buffy, I know that Spike has changed. It's not that I hate the idea of him being my best man, it's the thought of actually having to ask him. He's just gonna laugh in my face."

"Xander, don't be silly. I'm sure he'd be happy to help you out."



Xander stood in front of Spike silently fuming as he watched him clutch his sides in a fit of laughter.

"Spike, it's not that funny!" Xander exclaimed.

"Not that funny?" Spike questioned, still chuckling. "It's bloody priceless!"

Xander just stood there watching Spike try to calm down and fail miserably. He suddenly wished that Buffy had never been able to convince him to ask Spike such a huge favor in the first place.

"I just can't believe you just asked me to be your best man." Spike said, almost choking on his laughter. "You must be crazy if you think you are getting me into some monkey suit!"

"Just forget it Spike. I knew I shouldn't have asked you."

Xander turned from Spike and started to walk away. Spike sighed and grabbed Xander's shoulder, spinning him around until they faced each other.

"Get a bloody sense of humor, Harris. I was just kidding." Spike admitted, his expression turning very serious. "Actually, I would be honored to be your best man."

Xander studied him closely and when he realized that he was being sincere, he smiled and draped his arm around Spike's shoulders. Xander led him down the hall to where Spike could change his clothes.

"Now let's go find you a monkey suit." Xander laughed.



Spike stood next to Xander as the Wedding March started to play. He watched as Buffy, the beautiful maid of honor, made her way down the isle. He chuckled to himself as he looked at her bright red dress. Previously, Anya had asked Spike what color he thought she should choose and of course he picked red. However, Anya rolled her eyes at his answer and he never actually thought she would go with his suggestion.

Buffy's eyes grew wide as she noticed Spike was actually wearing a suit. He looked so sweet and so handsome but she could tell how uncomfortable he was in it. He was constantly fidgeting and slithering around as if the suit were something horribly foul. She continued to keep her eyes on him as she walked and for a moment imagined that she was walking to him at a wedding of her own.

Spike imagined that Buffy was walking down the isle for him. His breath caught in his throat as he pictured Buffy actually wanting to be with him forever. Everything was so perfect. He never thought that she would accept him after his soul was gone. It all seemed like a dream. Throughout his entire existence, the one thing that he wanted the most was someone to truly love him. He never thought it would happen but his wish has finally come true.

Anya walked down the isle in an elegant white strapless gown. She held a bouquet of flowers and it was evident to everyone how intensely her hands were shaking. She took her place beside Xander and he gently grabbed hold of one of her hands. She immediately stopped shaking at his touch. Now that he was there with her, all her nervousness had completely faded away.

Spike looked past Xander and Anya and drowned in the sight of Buffy who was standing on the other side of the bride. He watched her as she smiled so brightly as Xander said his wedding vows to Anya. He had helped him a little bit with his vows before the ceremony but he was so wrapped up in Buffy that he didn't hear a word he said and never noticed whether or not he had taken any of his advice.

Buffy, on the other hand, listened with quiet intensity as Xander spoke his words to Anya. As she listened to what he had said, she knew that Spike lent a hand with his words.

"Anya, I can't begin to tell you how happy you make me. I can't imagine living a day without you. I know we were never the most compatible couple. I know things between us weren't always perfect. You are my light when my life turns to darkness. I used to dread getting out of bed knowing that I had to say goodbye to my dreams. They were always better than my realty. But for the first time in my life I have looked forward to waking up in the morning because I knew that when I opened my eyes that you would be there with me. Loving you is the smartest thing I have ever done and I will continue to do so until this world ceases to exist."

Buffy's eyes formed tears as she as she heard Xander's words to Anya. 'You are my light when my life turns to darkness.' 'Loving you is the smartest thing I have ever done.' Those words reminded her so much of Spike and all they had to go through to finally be together. She looked at Spike and smiled as Anya began her vows.

"I Anya, promise to love you, to cherish you and to honor you. I entrust you with my heart. Take care of my heart, won't you please? Because it's all that I have and if you let me I will take care of your heart too. I love you and I will always love you. Before I knew you I was a completely different person. I've seen what love can do to people and it was always hurt and sadness. Alone was better. And then suddenly there was you and you knew me. You saw me. You make me feel safe and warm. So now I finally get it. I finally get love, Xander and it's with you. Now I finally get to spend my life with my best friend forever."

After the I do's, the bride and groom kissed and made their way back down the isle together. Spike and Buffy approached each other and he linked his arm in hers as they followed the happy couple to the reception.



Spike and Buffy walked onto the dance floor hand in hand after the bride and groom danced their first dance as a married couple. Spike slid his arms around her waist. Buffy's arms traveled upward and wrapped around the back of Spike's neck. She rested her forehead against his chest as they swayed to the music. After a few moments of silence between the two, Buffy looked up at Spike and an evil grin crossed her features. His eyes squinted in a look of suspicion as he wondered what she was up to.

"You look really cute in that suit." Buffy said with a sly grin.

"Bloody Hell!" Spike responded with his face toward the floor. If it were possible for him to blush he would have.

"Oh Spike! Don't be such a baby! It's not that bad. I think you look very nice."

She could see Spike's lips starting to form a flattered grin as he continued to stare at the floor. She ducked her head under his to give him a quick and gentle kiss. His grin grew even wider and he rested his head upon hers as they continued to dance.



After ten minutes of dancing Willow pulled Tara off to the side. They headed to an empty corner of the room where they could have some privacy.

"Is something wrong?" Tara asked with a worried expression.

"No, not at all. I just wanted to talk to you for a minute." Willow replied.

"Oh ok. What's up?" Tara smiled.

Willow beamed at her. She couldn't believe the difference in how she felt now that Tara was back. She has never loved anyone more than she loved Tara. It was like a great weight has been lifted off her shoulders and she was finally allowed to be happy.

"I've been thinking, and living with Buffy is great and all but maybe we should get a place together. A place of our own." Willow suggested.

"I think that's a great idea!"

"You do?" Willow asked.

"Well, of course, sweetie. It would be nice to have a little more privacy and people are always running in and out of Buffy's house. It would probably make it easier on everyone."

Willow looked down toward her lap where her fingers were twiddling nervously.

"Was there something else?" Tara questioned.

"Um, yeah. It's just.....um." Willow continued to fiddle nervously and her breathing became rapid and shallow.

"What is it? Willow, you know that you can tell me anything."

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm just a little nervous." Willow admitted.

Tara looked at her with a bewildered expression. She couldn't figure out what could possibly have Willow so rattled.

"I was so lost when you got killed. Life became meaningless to me and as much as I tried to go on, I just couldn't. I couldn't stand being without you. I kept waiting for things to get easier but they never did. I just missed you too much. If Spike hadn't brought you back, I honestly don't know what would've become of me. You are my life and I never want to have to spend another day without you."

Willow dipped a hand into her purse, which was hidden behind her and out of Tara's sight. She brought a shaky hand around from behind her back and presented Tara with a blue velvet box.

Tara watched as Willow opened the box to discover that a beautiful sapphire ring was inside of it. It was a large heart shaped stone with small white diamonds surrounding it.

Willow knew how long it would take her to pay for this ring but there was something about it that reminded her of Tara and she couldn't bring herself to settle for anything less.

"Willow, it's gorgeous!" Tara exclaimed.

"Will you marry me, Tara?" Willow asked with a racing heart.

Tara looked up at Willow, her eyes shimmering with tears.

"Willow, I love you so much. Of course I'll marry you!"

Willow slipped the sapphire ring on Tara's finger and they kissed while happy tears rolled down their smiling faces.



Willow and Tara ran up to Spike and Buffy who were still on the dance floor.

"Guess what?" Willow smiled brighter than she had in months.

"Boy, somebody got hit with the happy stick! What's going on guys?" Buffy inquired.

"We're engaged!" Tara announced as she waved her jewelry-clad finger in front of Buffy's face while jumping up and down.

"Oh my God! Congratulations!" Buffy squealed.

Her squeal was followed by another round of feminine squeals from all three girls. Spike stood back and observed them curiously while chuckling to himself at the sight of the girls' excitement.

Spike walked up to the newly engaged couple and wrapped his arms around both of them in one huge hug.

"That's great you two. Congrats!" Spike stepped back and couldn't believe how great he felt to be able to see the two lovebirds together again.

"Don't tell Anya though. Not yet anyway. If she found out I proposed to Tara at her wedding reception, I'd never hear the end of it. I could just hear her now accusing me of stealing her thunder." Willow said.

"Your secret is safe with me." Buffy replied.

"Well then, Xander and Anya are married and Willow and I are engaged. It looks like you two are the only ones left." Tara grinned sheepishly.

Tara and Willow walked away grinning like Cheshire cats as they left Spike and Buffy alone to ponder on Tara's comment.

Buffy looked at Spike and laughed nervously.

"They really love to stir up trouble don't they?" Buffy asked.

"They sure do." Spike grinned. "Can you imagine a slayer marrying a vampire? You would definitely go down in the record books for that one."

"Probably." Buffy admitted. "But I don't think I would mind if I spent the rest of my life with you." Buffy said before reaching up to place a kiss upon his lips.

Spike pulled her more tightly against him and pressed his lips to hers in the most passionate of kisses.

They reluctantly pulled away from each other as they heard the loud clearing of one's throat.

Xander stood before them with a goofy grin on his face.

"Sorry to interrupt your make-out session but the bride is about to throw her bouquet and I'm tossing the garter out to a giant group of love starved males. It's gonna be a mad house!" Xander said dramatically.

"You better take your places. We're tossing them out at the same time. It's Anya's idea. She says 'the sooner we get this tradition over with, the sooner we can start the honeymoon.' That's my wife for ya. Ok, now that sounded really weird. My wife!" Xander said, his goofy grin returning.

Buffy and Spike made their way to their respective groups where every single male and female were grouped together waiting superstitiously to see who would be getting married next.

Before both Anya and Xander threw their items into the crowds, they peeked behind their shoulders to scope out their targets.

Simultaneously, with a flick of the wrist, both items flew out into the crowds and just as they had intentioned, the bouquet landed perfectly in Buffy's arms and the garter flew into Spike's hands.

Spike came walking toward Buffy with the garter twirling around his finger.

"Why do I think this wasn't just a coincidence, pet?" Spike asked.

"I know. I saw them sneak a glance at us before they did the throwing. I think we were set up." Buffy replied.

"On the other hand, maybe it was fate. I know for a fact that Xander throws like a girl. His aim couldn't be that perfect if his life depended on it." Spike lips formed a cocky grin while Buffy laughed.

"You know, you're probably right. I'd rather think of it as fate anyway. I like that idea much better."

Spike stared into Buffy's eyes and placed a hand under her chin, slowing lifting her head up as he leaned forward into another spine tingling kiss.

As they parted, she wrapped her arms around him in a warm hug and pulled his head down so her lips were near his ear.

"I love you, Spike." Buffy gently whispered.

"I love you too, Buffy."

Buffy looked around the dance floor to see Xander and Anya getting ready to leave for their honeymoon.

She watched as Willow and Tara danced with each other with blissful smiles on their faces, as they thought about their future together.

She looked into Spike's crystal blue eyes and realized that she finally found happiness with someone she knew would be by her side forever.

None of them are sure of what their future holds, but they are going to enjoy this feeling while it lasts.

This was their perfect moment.

THE END

Personal Note: I'm so sorry it took me this long to post the last chapter! What a horrible time to get writer's block! I think I was so excited about the new season that I lost my motivation for a little while. If you've read this story, please review it! I would love to hear all of your thoughts on my story now that it is finally finished.

Special Thanks: I would like to thank SinisterChicHeatherMartin for keeping up with my story and reviewing every step of the way. I also want to thank each and every one of you reviewed. I've gotten some great feedback and some very nice comments that meant a whole lot to me. I also want to thank and say hello to my best friend Jenny, who even though she's not really a Buffy fan, says she still wants to read my story.

Extra Special Thanks: I want to thank and dedicate this story to my best buddy Liz. She came to visit me over the summer and we had a long conversation about the show. She is a huge W/T shipper and we were trying to find a way to bring Tara back. A few days later, I got the idea for this story and thought it was a perfect way to bring Tara back as well as giving Buffy and Spike the happy ending I've always wanted for them.