MINIATURE GOLF. BtVS Intertext/Allusion.

The game of golf played on a scaled-down self-contained course, often presenting wacky obstacles. Miniature golf figures in three Buffy episodes. In Season Two's opening episode "When She was Bad," Xander suggests they play it after school:

WILLOW: Hey, Buffy.


WILLOW: We saved you a seat.

XANDER: There's a rumor going around that, uh, Mr. Cox is the most boring teacher in the entire world. Like, I think he won a belt or something.

BUFFY: Like, yes.

WILLOW: Well, I hear he nods off a lot. So that's a plus.

XANDER: So, we Bronzin' it tonight?

WILLOW: Wednesday, it's kinda beat.

XANDER: Well, we could grind our enemies into talcum powder with a sledgehammer, but, gosh, we did that last night. Hey, I got a plan: how 'bout miniature golf.

WILLOW: There's no course here.

XANDER: Okay, uh, miniature tennis! A very tiny form of tennis that we could invent . . .

Ten episodes later (in "Ted"), however, Sunnydale has evidently acquired a miniature golf course, for Joyce Summers' new boyfriend Ted (actually a serial killing robot) takes the Scooby Gang miniature golfing (and becomes incensed at Buffy for cheating).

In the Buffyverse, an obsession with miniature golf becomes a sign of pathology. Another fan of the game is The Mayor, as he reveals to Faith in a bizarre exchange in "Enemies" after she has been "played" by Angel and Buffy:

MAYOR: Well, you win some, you lose some. From where I'm sitting, it's batting average that counts. So you lost some friends.

FAITH: I wouldn't exactly call them friends.

MAYOR: Well, what are you worried about? Chin up! You don't see me looking disappointed. Heck, no. You know why? Because I know you'll always have me, Faith. I'm the best, the most important friend you'll ever have. Besides, you know, once the Ascension starts, the 'in' crowd you're so concerned about? Whoo! They'll be lucky if there's enough left of them to fill a pothole. Promise. Still unhappy? Okey doke. I've got two words that are going to make all the pain go away. Miniature golf. (grins)

Photo from the Atlantic Miniature Gold website.

--David Lavery