Nobody knows who I am. Not the real me. It's like, nobody cares enough to find out. I mean, does anyone ever ask me what I want to do with my life? Or what my opinion is on stuff? Or what restaurant to order in from? No. Underline. Exclamation point. Exclamation point, exclamation point. No one understands. No one has an older sister who's a slayer. People wouldn't be so crazy about her if they had to live in the same house with her every single day. Everybody cares what she thinks. Just 'cause she can do back flips and stuff. Like that's such a crucial job skill in the real world. Plus Mom lets her get away with everything. 'Your sister's saving the world.' I could so save the world if somebody handed me super powers... but I'd think of a cool name and wear a mask to protect my loved ones, which Buffy doesn't even. If this town wasn't so lame everyone would completely know what she does. And then I bet they wouldn't even be that impressed, because like, killing things with wood? Oh, scary vampires, they die from a splinter.
I don't think Buffy's Watcher likes me too much. I think it's 'cause he's just so... old. I'm not sure how old he is, but I heard him use the word "newfangled" one time. So he's gotta be pretty far gone.
Willow's the awesomest person. She's the only one I know who likes school as much as me. Even her friends are cool! Like Tara. She and Willow are both witches. They do spells and stuff, which is so much cooler than slaying. I told Mom one time I wished they'd teach me some of the things they do together. A-and then she got really quiet and made me go upstairs. Huh. I guess her generation isn't cool with witchcraft.
Oh, come on. She is so dead. Well, he's clearly a psychopath. Is so. What? No, that is not Tom Hanks. Well, what channel are you on? OK, there it is again. I keep hearing this, like, thumping. No, I-I can't tell if it's? ... Kit, are you there? Is there a storm?
I know you're there. I will cast you out. My mother needs to talk to me. "I cast you from this place. It is your poison and your bane. It is the skin that is cut from your flesh! I cast you out with every prayer from every god that walked the Earth and crawled beneath. I cast you out with the strength of those who love me. I cast your out with the strength I have inside me! I cast you out into the void." That's right! Die, you bastard!