Title: After
Author: Laura
Email: yummyspike@yahoo.com
Summary: Picks up where "Into the Woods" lets off.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: All the characters belong to Joss Whedon, WB, Mutant Enemy… all the lucky people. I do this just for fun, and because they’re showing too many re-runs.
Note: Riley’s gone, Riley’s gone, ding dong, Riley’s gone!!
Other: B/S conversation

After "Into the Woods"


Buffy sat on the stairs for a long time, unable to find the will to move.

Her tears had dried up long ago, and she was quiet, not wanting to face her mother or Dawn. She didn’t even lift her head when she heard the front door open.

“Slayer?"

“I don’t want to see you. Go away.”

Spike ignored her and walked to where she was sitting. He could tell that she had been crying, but she wasn’t anymore.

“Are you alright, pet?”

“I said I don’t want to see you.”

“Then don’t look at me. But answer me.”

“Why do you care, Spike?” she suddenly pinned him with a stare, and he was taken aback by the blank look in her eyes. He couldn’t do anything but shrug.

“Don’t give me that crap,” she said coldly. “Did you show up here just to gloat? Maybe you could go call Angel, and the two of you could gloat together.”

“I’m not here to gloat, Slayer. And if I were, there would be no way in hell I’d call the bloody poof about it. I just want to know if you’re alright.”

“This should have been pretty much the happiest day of my life. My mom’s going to live. She had brain surgery, and she’s doing great. Why is it too much to ask to just let Buffy be happy for a day?” she whispered.

“So be happy, pet. Tell everything else in your life to sod off, and be happy.”

“My, but aren’t you the comedian,” Buffy scoffed. “So, sod off, go away, and make me happy.”

“Are you telling me that you’d be suddenly happy if I just disappeared right now? Or would you just sit here and sulk some more?”

“I’d sulk more. But, still, telling you to go away is becoming a habit.”

Spike thought for a bit, then a grin lit his face. “I bet I know what might cheer you up!”

“I don’t want to be cheered up. Go away.”

“You’re boy-toy did something you’d be proud of, though, luv! He staked me, right through the heart, he did. Plastic stake. Scared the crap out of me! Now you can go make up with him,” he said, smiling to himself. As much as he hated the thought of Buffy and Riley together, he couldn’t stand seeing her this way. The smile disappeared as he saw the cold fury and anger in her eyes.

For the second time that night, he began to fear for his life.

“He did what?” she screamed.

“Pet! Your family!” Spike hastily whispered, trying to calm her down.

“He cheats on me, sneaks around behind my back, and then not only has the nerve to give *me* an ultimatum, but he stakes you too? That asshole!” she whispered violently.

“Let me get this right, here. You’re mad because he almost killed me? That’s unusual.”

“No! I’m mad because he’s a son of a bitch! I’m mad because he’s gone! And I can’t get him back,” she whispered as she broke into sobs again. She laid her head on her knees and pulled herself into a small ball.

“What do you mean, gone? He just told me to stay away from you, or he’d kill me. How can he be gone?” Spike was completely confused.

“He left. The Initiative,” Buffy gasped.

“He left?” Spike roared. He looked vaguely ashamed as he heard movement from upstairs. “Bloody hell,” he cursed softly.

“Buffy?” Joyce called.

“She’s here, Joyce. And she’s alright. I’m sorry for yelling,” Spike called back up to the Slayer’s mother.

“Oh. Ok. Goodnight, Spike.”

“’Night Joyce,” Spike returned.

Buffy was still curled into a ball, rocking back and forth. Gently Spike touched her shoulder, much like he had the night Buffy had found out about her mother’s tumor. Buffy’s sobs started anew, and Spike felt completely helpless.

“Why?” she cried.

“He was a wanker, Buffy. Don’t let him do this to you!” Spike tried to talk some sense to the distraught Slayer.

“I did this Spike! I’ve cried in front of you more than I did him! Why couldn’t I open up to him?” By this time the small blonde was all but wailing, and Spike was getting angry.

“That’s easy, pet. You don’t have to protect me. You don’t have to be strong for me. I don’t need protection from the world. So you can let go around me,” he answered softly. “But don’t ever let me hear you say that this was your fault again. My fault, for showing you, maybe. But mainly his fault. He knew who you were, Buffy. He knew that you were a protector. He had just as many choices in this as you did. He made all the wrong ones. At least you made yours with good intentions.”

“Yeah, well, you know what they say about good intentions,” she choked out. Carefully, afraid of angering her, Spike pulled her into his arms. She cried on his shoulder for a little while, then wiped her eyes.

“I still want to know why you told me, Spike,” she said softly. “You can’t hit me anymore, so you decided to hurt me like this?”

“Cor, no, pet. Hurting you was the last thing on my mind,” he answered before he could stop himself. “I just… I just thought you should know. You should know that he wasn’t good enough for you.”

“But he made me happy,” Buffy said. “Isn’t that good enough?”

“No. You deserve more than just happiness. You are the most loyal, passionate, caring person I’ve ever met. You deserve the same thing from your mate,” Spike said, trying to make her see what was so obvious to everyone else that knew her. Normal would never do, because she deserved so much more than just a normal love. He was shocked when she giggled.

“Mate? I’m not a vampire, Spike,” she said softly.

“You know what I mean,” he frowned at her. Slowly, Spike release his hold on the small blonde, and she sat up straighter. “Buffy, I want you to listen to me. Will you?” he asked, looking into her green eyes.

“I’ve been listening to you most of the night, Spike. That’s how we got here,” she reminded him.

“I’m being serious, Slayer,” he growled. She nodded and looked at him expectantly. “Don’t blame yourself for this. Maybe, if he had been willing to give you time, you could have loved him. But he chose not to. He chose to lie to you. He chose to go to vampire whores when he could have had you. He chose to leave you. He could have stayed and tried to work it out, but he didn’t. He did what he wanted to, Buffy. Now you do what you have to.”

“Just like Angel,” Buffy sighed. “They all decide that I can’t handle them or the differences between us, and they leave. I hate men.”

“Just don’t go join the lover-wiccans,” Spike joked. Buffy stuck her tongue out at him, and he smiled at her. “You’ll be alright, pet. You always come out of things ahead.”

“But it hurts,” she whispered.

“Finding love always does,” Spike said, staring down at her sorrowfully in the darkness. He had meant the words he said to Riley. He didn’t think he had a chance, but he would be damned if he’d give up. He stood up, and smiled at her one last time, then walked out the door.

End