Title: Am I Evil? (3/16)
Author: Kylia
Email: kylia_bug@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Nobody belongs to me, unfortunately. They belong to Joss & Mutant Enemy, and a few other people I don't know.
Rating: R
Spoilers: Everything up to "The Initiative". The story starts during the dorm scene from The Initiative; it's my own twisted world after that.
Category: Willow/Spike
Summary: What if Spike had never been implanted when he visited Willow in the dorms?
Distribution: Fire & Ice, WitchFanFic, Of Sire & Childe, anyone else, ask, and you shall receive
Author's Notes: having a bit of Writers Block. Hoping this will help.
Dedication: To Inell, who knows how I feel.

Canada 2009


Willow gripped the girls' throat firmly, her nails digging into the tender flesh there. She pushed her hard against the tree and watched her head fall forward as she lapsed into unconsciousness. She dropped the body to the ground and turned the vampire that was standing just behind her.

"Take her." She nodded towards the fallen girl. "Bring her to the master." She eyed the vampire carefully. "I wish to know if she speaks the truth."

Christian nodded. "Yes, mistress."

After Christian had taken the girls body away, Willow turned towards Melanie. She had taken her out hunting tonight. It was the first tine in a long time they had come out without Spike or Trevor, Melanie's mate and Willow's second childe. This girl had interrupted their hunt. She spoke of the Slayer, and how her members had dwindled. How the Slayer was made weak and now was the time to take over the Hellmouth. The girl was a servant to a demon who wished to open the portal to the demon dimension. Would they never learn?

"Mellie, I think it may be time to return home. Would you like that?" She took the vampire's hand and grinned. There is such evil there. You can feel it in the air. And the Slayer? Her blood will be ours. Her pain tangible." She giggled. "Come, let's find you something young to eat."

She led Melanie through the trees to the center of the part. The people in this part of Canada were so trusting. They wandered the streets at night, fearing nothing. They allowed their children free reign in the park after dark. Oh well, they would soon learn. Willow watched her childe as she inhaled deeply smelling the innocence of youth, reveling in the death that was yet to come.

As Melanie left the shadows and found her dinner, Willow thought back to what she had learned. She didn't know if the servant girl spoke the truth, but if she did, it was time to return home. To go back to the mouth of Hell. They had stayed away for far too long as it was, and if the rumors were true, if the Slayer had allied herself with the vermin who had hunted their numbers for their own insidious purpose, then she was no longer a slayer. She was no longer a worthy opponent. No longer worth the hunt. No, if the rumors were true, the Slayer would suffer an eternity of pain, alongside those she had climbed into bed with.

She turned slightly as she heard someone approaching the park from behind her. Sniffing the air, she sighed. Human. Probably the children's mother. She turned around and hid herself in the sagging leaves of the tree. When a young woman came walking by, crunching her feet on the leaves as she went, Willow reached out and grabbed the woman, wrapping an arm around her and covering her mouth with her hand. The woman bit down on Willow's palm, drawing blood.

Willow laughed as she pulled the woman closer to her. She gripped her shoulder firmly with her other hand while she lifted the wounded palm up, tilting it so she could see in the light of the moon. She licked her blood away from her hand. When she turned back to the woman, she noticed she was staring at her with a mix of revulsion and terror etched across her features. Willow smiled broadly, letting her fangs show menacingly.

"Trust me, you're better off this way." She spoke soothingly as she placed one hand along her tender throat. She caressed the woman's head lightly with her other hand, bringing it to rest on the back of her head. In once swift motion she snapped her neck and let her body fall to the floor. She looked sadly as the woman for a second before speaking softly.

"You wouldn't have wanted to bury your children." She whispered as she turned back towards the children's play area.

All was silent now. Nothing moved, save for the graceful moves of Melanie as she made her way back through the trees, cloaked in darkness. Willow had to laugh. She had taught her childe well. She wasn't very old. Barely three, but she was strong, and intelligent. Two things Willow had insisted on. She had made her for Trevor. She was to be his mate.

Willow had hoped Melanie would temper Trevor. He was brash and impulsive, obnoxious and impatient. Not unlike Spike, but without Spike's years of experience. Without Spike's sense of things. In time Trevor would learn all of that.

"Mum?" Melanie called softly from behind her. "You ready?"

Willow smiled at Melanie. "Yes lets." She clasped the younger vampire's hand and the two walked off into the night, towards home.

Buffy slumped into the couch wearily. She looked up when Riley entered the room. She smiled slightly but he could tell her heart wasn't in it. She was exhausted, and she had only patrolled for less than an hour. It really wasn't necessary anymore for her to go on nightly patrols.

Riley and the other member's of the initiative kept a tight rain on the general demon population. She didn't know exactly what they did with the creatures they captured and she did really want to know. It was enough for her that they disappeared and she never had to deal with them again.

Honestly, she was only really needed as the slayer if some major baddie came to town, looking to destroy the world, or if some prophecy surfaced. She enjoyed her semblance of a semi-normal life. She had two children with Riley and they didn't need to know what went bump in the night. She was content to pretend she was just your average normal person.

And it worked, for the most part, but every once in awhile she would remember how things used to be… before. Before Angel had left. Before the Initiative. Before Willow had disappeared. That had been the worst. She was there one moment, and gone the next.

Buffy had never seen her again after the first night she had run into the Initiative. There had been some sort of scuffle with Riley and his commandos at her dorm. Although she didn't know it was Riley at the time. But by the time she had returned home, Willow was gone, never to be seen or heard from again.

At first everyone was kind of relieved to be free of her constant whining over Oz's departure, but relief soon gave way to fear that she had been killed, or worse, captured by the Initiative. When it was clear that hadn't happened, the fear gave way to anger that she had just left. She had apparently run away without a goodbye. Without a second thought.

They knew she wasn't dead because they hadn't found a body, and the threat that she was a vampire quickly became an implausibility when they realized that had she been turned she would have been there, taunting them, as Angelus had done. But since she was simply… gone, they realized she had just run away, like a coward, unwilling to deal with her pain.

All that remained of their feelings for her was anger at her cowardice. But her departure had weakened the group. They no longer had cohesion. Buffy had thrown herself into the Initiative as soon as she had learned about them. Their fight was the same as hers. She enjoyed the feeling of having military backup. Xander and Anya were still around, but not as much. Anya was extremely uncomfortable around the Initiative, which was something Buffy could never understand. You'd think she'd be grateful to know someone was keeping the streets safe for their children.

Giles was still around. He was still the constant in her universe. He had entered into a relationship with Maggie Walsh. At first they clashed on everything, but eventually they had reached an understanding. Giles was fascinated by her work with demons. So much so that he probably knew more about what happened to them once they were captured than the Slayer did. It didn't really matter, so long as the streets of Sunnydale were safe. And they were.

Buffy sighed and wondered absently when she would stop dwelling on the past. It was over and done with. Nothing could be changed, and nothing that had happened then could affect the future.

Cordelia screamed as she bolted upright in bed. She was panting heavily and gasping for breath. Her mind was lost in the sea of images left over from her vision. She kept shaking her head, willing what she had seen to go away. Praying that just this once, the vision was wrong.

She felt cool hands take her gently into strong arms. Angel pressed her back against his naked chest, soothing her. He ran a hand through her hair tenderly.

"What is it, Delia? What did you see?" His voice was quiet and soothing, helping her to relax.

"Willow" She whispered. "And Spike." She tilted her head up to look into her lover's eyes. "They're coming home."




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