Title: History
Author: Wildecate
Email: Wildecate@hotmail.com
Rating: G
Disclaimer: None of it is mine. Especially the song, that belongs to The Calling.
Summary: Brief look at Angel and Cordelia.

Angel paced down the alleyway, keeping to the shadows, using his preternatural skill to remain undetected as he followed his target. The other vampire was completely unaware of his presence, his attention devoted to the beautiful girl by his side. He was still in normal face, luring the girl into his trap, waiting for his moment to strike. Just as the girl turned her lovely face to his, expecting a kiss, the vampire’s features morphed into the deformed demon face. The girl screamed loudly. Angel’s cue.

It was the work of less than a minute, not even a human heartbeat for Angel to move in and with one punch drop the vampire to the floor. Angel bent over the vampire and plunged the stake deep into its chest. The vamp melted away beneath him and he turned to the girl who was on her knees a few metres away, crying. He handed her a hankerchief and helped her to her feet.


I am a vision, I am justice
Never thought that I could love
Living in shadows, faded existence
It was never good enough


Angel looked at the unknown man who had entered his sanctuary. Messy hair, pale skin, strange eyes but a familiar accent. And definitely not human.

“Why me?"

"Because you’ve got potential. And the balance sheet isn’t exactly in your favor."

"Well why you?"

Doyle gave him a fleeting grin. "We all got something to atone for."


Within the darkness, you were the light that shines away
You’re trapped in violence, I can be the man that saves the day


Angel tugged the lift gate back and stepped into the office. He saw Cordelia sitting there, her hair plaited neatly back, her face free of makeup, her clothes unusually sombre. She looked back at him, her brown eyes full of hurt and pain. She stood up and moved around her desk and stretched out one hand. He took it and folded her into his arms. She leaned against him, grateful for the comfort he was giving her. He stroked a hand across her hair, feeling her heart beating slowly in her chest. When she stepped back the tears had already started falling and she wiped them away with her fingers, angry with herself.

“Sorry” she sniffed “I’m trying very hard not to keep doing that. I haven’t even bothered putting make up on today because it doesn’t seem to stay on for very long.”

“Take the day off Cordy. Go to the beach, get some sun, do some shopping.”

Angel was concerned when Cordelia flopped back into her chair, even the thought of shopping not exciting her.

“I’ll pass but thanks anyway. Hey, you want some coffee?” she offered him the jug and he could see the granules swishing about in the bottom. Her coffee was disgusting, Doyle had always said so and so Angel had rarely drunk it.

He held his mug out.


I’m there for you
No matter what
I’m there for you
Never giving up
I’m there for you
For you


The nurse who was looking after Cordelia finished cleaning the entry site where the IV entered her hand and slung another bag of sedatives by the bed. The doorway was darkened for a moment as her friend came in. She looked at him appreciatively, broad shoulders, dark eyes but a strangely haunted expression. He did not even look at her, could not even muster a smile of thanks for her, so heart broken was he at the sight of his best friend unconscious on the bed. She left quietly, wishing there was something she could do. He had said he was family but the look he had given Cordelia seemed to say more than that.

Angel sat down heavily next to the bed and took hold of Cordelia’s hand. Her skin was warm and dry and he touched it longing to feel it clasp back but there was nothing. Her face, usually so lively and happy, was completely still and expressionless except for the flickering of her eyes beneath the lids. He desperately wanted to see her laughing brown eyes meet his but they remained closed. He could not bear the torment she was going through - he did not understand what was happening other than someone was trying to get to him through Cordelia and that, above everything, was unforgiveable.

"Cordelia, I'm gonna fix this. Promise. I'm gonna get you back. I need you back."


Someone has changed me, something saved me
Now this is who I am
Although I was blinded, my heart let me find that
Truth makes a better man


Angel slumped on the couch, hating himself even more in that moment that he had ever done before. Even when he had left Buffy he had not felt this badly. Cordelia sat beside him, wanting to say the right thing but she wasn’t Buffy. She didn’t have a hotline to Angel’s feelings so she just let him talk, hoping he could give her a clue.

"I-I saw the light at the end of the tunnel - that some day I might become human. - - That light was so bright, I thought I was already out."

Oh yeah, now she knew where he was coming from. He thought that after everything they had been through, that stupid prophecy saying he would become human, that he might redeem himself. Business had been pretty brisk recently and what with all the demon and vampire killing and all those grateful people. Yeah, it was it easy to think they were gaining the upper hand.

"Yeah. We all got a little cocky, didn't we? - It's gonna be a long while - until you work your way out but I know you well enough to know you *will*. - And I'll be with you until you do."

Angel turned to look at her and suddenly the world didn’t seem so bad. Knowing that she would be there beside him, fighting with him, patching him up again, he would get to see that killer smile every day. Now that was something worth fighting for.


I didn’t notice that you were right in front of me
A mask of silence, we’ll put away so we can see
Within the darkness, you are the light
That shines away


"You wanna know how I am? Tired mostly - with sweaty running a close second. I'm also jazzed. Can't wait to get our business up and sputtering again - ready to help those helpless.”

Cordelia faced him - the vampire that she had once relied on, that she had trusted with her life. The vampire that had fired her without a moment’s thought and taken off some manic crusade of his own. She had known him longer than any of the rest of them, remembered him when he was doing his “tall dark handsome stranger routine” round Sunnydale with Buffy, she remembered him as Angelus, she remembered him saving her life on countless occasions and her promise to be with him until he had redeemed himself. Kind of difficult to be with someone who didn’t want you. And now she learned to live without him. It had taken everything she had to keep going knowing that her best friend wouldn’t be at the office to see her, that he could be unlucky one night and end up a pile of dust and she wouldn’t even know about it. And she was angry, boy was she angry. In fact she was beyond angry - she was furious with him for treating her like a piece of crap. So she said the one thing that she knew would hurt him beyond anything else.

“But, just so we understand each other - you and I? - We're not friends”


In this blind justice, I can be the man
That saves the day


Cordelia moved from the lobby and out into the garden and stood for a moment, feeling the sun on her face, her closed eyes and her skin. She had missed this so much. She had missed just feeling. Fred had obviously been tending the garden, something to do while she wasn’t inventing things that could take out an entire city block or saving the world. The plants were lush and verdant and the flower blooms were gorgeous, rich oranges and reds and tropical pinks. The scent was amazing. Cordelia breathed in deeply, inhaling their perfume and then there was the scent of something else. A scent she knew. Aftershave.

“Cordy.”

“I can't. Angel, I-I'm sorry.” Cordelia spoke desperately but could not stop herself from turning to look at him.

“You remember?” he asked uncertainly.

“I remember all of it. All of it. And I have to be alone. Please? For a while. It's too... I — “ Cordelia made to go back inside but turned back as Angel called after her, suddenly.

“Cordelia. Were we in love?”

There was a pause, he could hear her heart beat, once, twice, three times before she could bring herself to look at him and answer.

“We were.”


I’m there for you
No matter what
I’m there for you
Never giving up
I’m there for you
For you