Title: Real Friends
Author: Paradox761
Email: Paradox761@mail.com
Website: members.tripod.com/~Paradox761
Disclaimer: Joss and co. own all things Buffy, no copyright infringement is intended so please don’t sue. I don’t have any money anyway.
Summery: Post “Superstar”, Xander confronts Buffy about the way she’s been treating him lately. Buffy denies it of course, but when Willow takes Xander’s side she’s forced to do some series thinking about her friends. Also, things heat up in the romance department for Xander and Anya, as well as for Willow and Tara. Can Xander, Willow and Buffy make it through all this and still come out friends on the other side?
Spoilers and such: General spoilers for season four, specifically for “Superstar”. Also, this is my first attempt at a Xander/Anya, so please be gentle. I’m of the mindset that Anya is different when she and Xander are alone, so you might find her characterization off a little bit. It’s all a matter of perspective. Also, this story was written before “New Moon Rising”, which kind of makes it a moot point as far as W/T, but I don’t think TPTB have been very far with the relationship as far as showing how they fell in love. Consider this an alternative explanation.
Also, acknowledgments and thanks have to go to the denizens of alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer. This story was inspired by the discussion threads that sprung up around “Superstar”. I’d like to thank you all by name, but I don’t have that kind of time here.
(BtVS, Xander/Anya, Willow/Tara, NC-17)

(2/9)

Xander walked into the lunchroom at UC Sunnydale and looked around. He spotted Willow sitting alone eating her lunch and quickly made his way over to her. She hadn’t seen him so Xander took the opportunity to walk up behind her and tap her on the opposite shoulder then the side he sat down next to. She turned, falling for it, and then turned back to face Xander who was flashing a typical grin. “Are you ever going to grow up,” she said playfully, smiling herself.

Xander pretended to think about it. “Ah, no, probably not,” he said.

“Good, I like you this way.”

“Thanks Wills, I kind of like me this way too,” he said flashing another grin.

“You seem awfully happy today,” Willow observed as Xander picked off her plate.

“Yeah, I suppose I am,” he said.

But before Willow could ask him why, Buffy walked up. “Hey Xander, what are you doing here in this fine institution of academia,” she said taking the seat across from him. “Seeing as how you don’t go here and all.”

Xander inwardly winced. Even Willow looked uncomfortable, but Buffy was just smiling away. “Wow, big words Buff, I guess you really learn things in college, besides how to drink and sponge off your parents.”

Buffy opened her mouth to speak, but Willow spoke first. “I invited him,” she said. “We’ve all been so busy lately that we haven’t seen much of each other. You know, between school and…stuff.”

“That’s true,” Buffy agreed. “So, Xander, how is ‘stuff’?”

Xander kept his face neutral. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t play it off with a joke either, like he normally would have done. “Fine Buffy, just fine.” Willow gave him a sympathetic look. The fact was, Willow had made a tremendous effort to include Xander since her and Buffy had started at UC Sunnydale. She steered Buffy towards the Bronze as opposed to the on-campus hangouts. She invited Xander anytime there was a party. The two of them had even started talking on the phone a lot more, like they used to when they were kids. Xander really had to give it up to Willow, she was a great friend, and she was being put in a difficult position. Xander himself always tried to make sure that Willow understood that he held her no malice because she was in college and he wasn’t. If anything, their friendship had grown stronger. With Buffy however, the exact opposite was true. It wasn’t that she purposely tried to exclude Xander, she just seemed…indifferent. Like it didn’t matter one way or the other whether Xander was still her friend. The fact was though, Buffy hadn’t done anything overt to show Xander he was unwanted, so he really didn’t have anything to complain about. He didn’t know whether or not Buffy was doing these things intentionally or if she honestly didn’t know how much she was hurting him. Either way however, the result was the same.

The three talked over lunch. Or to be more accurate, Buffy talked, steering the topic of conversation towards college related things for which Xander had nothing to say about. For the most part, he remained quiet. Chuckling where he was supposed to in the anecdotes being told, and occasionally picking off of Willow’s plate. Until finally, there was a lull in the conversation. Buffy had went to get her lunch, and sat back down to eat. Willow was just finishing her own meal, with Xander’s help of course, when she looked up at Xander. He could tell by the look in her eye she was trying to think of a topic to shift to that Xander could get in on too. Xander found the topic she chose to be interestingly coincidental.

“So, Xander, how are things with you and Anya?” Willow asked.

Xander flashed that famous grin of his for the first time since Buffy sat down. He was glad Willow had asked him for two reasons. The first was that he was still on an emotional high from what had happened the night before, and the second was that he was glad that Willow was finally starting to accept Anya. It was the same thing that happened when either of them became involved with someone. Being such close friends, the other would automatically become protective and defensive, but it passed. Willow had gone through the same thing when she found out about him and Cordelia, and Xander had gone through the same thing with her and Oz. This was of course also topped by the fact that no one trusted Anya in the beginning because of her former demon lifestyle. But, over the last few months, Anya had shown herself to be a friend to the Scooby Gang and any mistrust had been put to rest. “Things are great,” Xander said enthusiastically. “Wonderful even. In fact,” Xander paused. He glanced over to Buffy who was putting a spoon full of Jello in her mouth. “I told her I love her.”

Buffy promptly went into a choking fit, spitting up her Jello back onto her plate. Willow patted her on the back a few times until she held up her hand that she was fine. ‘Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for,’ Xander thought to himself.

“Xander, are you sure?” Willow asked.

Xander smiled at his best friend. “Yeah Wills, I’m sure. We both are.”

Willow looked concerned, but she saw Xander’s smile and heard his assurances. She thought to herself about how much Anya had changed, and how much she seemed to genuinely care about Xander. In the end, she trusted her friend’s judgment. She smiled and reached out to grip his hand. “Then I’m happy for you Xander, you deserve it.”

Xander took his friend’s sentiment to heart. She had heard what he said, expressed concern, gave it some thought, and decided that if he was happy, she was happy. All in the matter of a few seconds. What more could you ask for in a friend. “Thanks Wills, that means a lot coming from you,” he said.

“Xander, don’t take this the wrong way, but are you nuts!” Buffy said once she’d regained her power of speech. Whether she had even heard Willow and Xander’s exchange was unclear. “I mean, I understand you’re out for a little action, but love?”

Xander didn’t speak for a moment. Buffy would have shocked him less if she had slapped him in the face. “Do you really think that little of me?” Xander said after a moment.

“Xander…” Buffy started, but he didn’t let her finish. It was the way she said his name. Exasperated, patronizing, like she was patting him on the head saying ‘No, no, no, you foolish boy.’

“No, I mean it. Is that all you think this is, that I’m just using her for sex. You know, just because I’m not in college Buffy doesn’t mean I’m still in high school. I’m not the sex-crazed teenager I was.”

“You mean six whole months ago,” Buffy said. “Xander, I’m just trying to tell you to think with your brain, not with your dick. You have to admit, you’ve let lust lead you into some bad situations. Your crush on me, the fluke with Willow.”

Willow’s jaw dropped at this too. “Is that what you think!” Xander nearly shouted. “I was just trying to get into your pants? Well that couldn’t be further from the truth Buffy, and I would think you’d be able to see that. It took me a while to sort through my feelings for you, and while it might not be true love it was hardly only lust. I thought we were friends.” He lowered his voice slightly. “And as for bringing Willow into this, that’s a low blow.”

“Xander, we are friends,” Buffy said. “That’s why I’m trying to help you. I mean, what do we really know about Anya. She used to be a demon, who knows where her loyalty lies.”

‘Of all the arrogance…’ Xander was fuming. He could hardly believe the words that were leaving his so-called friend’s mouth. “Speaking from experience Buff?”

Now Buffy was getting angry. “That’s not the same at all!”

“It’s completely the same!” Xander shouted back. “And while Angel and I might not have gotten along, at least I respected your judgment enough to trust you.”

“Yeah right Xander, you trusted me! That’s why you initiated that little intervention in the library when you found out that Angel was back!”

“What did…” Xander stopped mid-sentence and took a breath. He was about to say ‘What did you expect me to do’. “No, this isn’t about Angel. This is about me and Anya, and you treating me like an dirt.”

“I’m treating you like dirt just because I don’t like your girlfriend?”

“This started long before Anya entered the picture. You say you’re my friend Buffy, but you’ve made every attempt to write me out of your life. You expect me to follow behind you for the rest of my life without so much as an acknowledgment from you, without so much as one word of approval! What do I have to do to keep being your friend? Am I not smart enough, not strong enough, not witty enough to hang with the all-mighty slayer? Huh! I gave up any chance I had at a normal life for you. To fight the good fight, and to be your friend, and now you just want to cut me loose and forget about me! Well, fine! If that’s the way you want it, fine.” Xander rose from his chair and pushed it back in rather hard. For the first time he noticed the entire lunchroom staring at him, but he was so angry he didn’t care. He lowered his voice a little and looked back at Buffy one more time. “Nice knowing you Buffy,” he said, and then he stormed out of the lunchroom.

Buffy just sat there in shock. Willow was pretty taken aback too. “Can you believe him?” Buffy said.

“Yeah, I can actually,” Willow said, agitation showing in her voice as well. She had let Buffy walk all over Xander for long enough.

“What?” Buffy said, pure astonishment in her voice.

“First, you completely dismiss his feelings for Anya and tell him he’s just out for sex. Then, you accuse him of lusting after you when you should know that Xander cares about you more then that. And quite frankly, he cares about me more then that too. How dare you! I was part of that fluke too and I can tell you it wasn’t just lust. Xander and I have been friends since kindergarten, and we do love each other, even if we don’t *love* each other. And then to tell him that we can’t trust Anya, I’ll admit I was just as wary about her as you were, but that’s ridiculous. And Xander was right, we trusted you an awful lot when it came to Angel, the least you could do is extend him the same courtesy. You haven’t been a very good friend to him lately. I been afraid to say anything, but he has every right to be mad. I mean, he didn’t stay in Sunnydale to deliver pizzas, he stayed for you and the slaying, and you haven’t said so much as thank you.” Willow took a deep breath and calmed herself. Buffy for her part was still in a shock induced silence. Willow picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder as she stood. “I think maybe you’ve got a lot to think about, I’ve got a class.” And with that, Willow too left the lunchroom. Leaving Buffy to wonder what the hell just happened.




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