Title: The Hell in Wanting... (1/2) ****YES. THIS STORY IS RATED NC-17, WHICH MEANS KIDS AND CONGRESSPERSONS SHOULD NOT BE READING IT****
Author: JR
Email: JRR42@yahoo.com
Rating: NC-17
Episode spoilers: Up to season 2. Season 3 ain't happening here.
Status: Complete
Archive: To those with permission, yes. Everybody else, please ask first, I usually say yes.
Series/Sequel: The ‘Hell Series’? This is story # 7.
Warnings: Sex! Lots of it ;-)
Disclaimer: Angel, Willow, et al, are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and the WB. All characters are used without permission. This story is not intended to infringe upon any copyrights, nor is any profit being made from it.
Thanks: To Carrie for beta reading, and to Marius for the... inspiration ;-) And to Sky, Nickie, and Joy for telling me to go ahead and post. Dedicated to Saber, Robin, and all the other writers who keep me screaming for *more*!
Notes: This story takes place a few days after the events in ‘You Forgot to Mention Hell, Horatio.’ Reading that story is, however, *not* necessary in order to understand this one (especially since I haven't finished it yet ;-) Thar be sex ahead, so if you aren’t old enough to vote those ‘cut-funding-for-the-arts-bastards’ out of Congress, you shouldn’t be here. Come back when you’re legal.
Archive summary: Angel and Willow horizontal. ‘Nuff said.

“Hard to tell or recognize a sign to see me through a warning sign.
First the thunder, (if the past it will not lie), then the storm
Torn asunder, (the future), you and I get blown away.”
-- In a Lifetime, Clannad

It was the soft ‘click’ of the lock in the door catching that woke me. Startled by the sound and somewhat fearful of possible danger, I was actually grateful for the extra adrenaline that began pumping through my veins. It went a long way in dispelling the cobwebs of sleepiness from my awareness.

“Who’s there?” I rasped, my voice still thick from sleep.

That’s when I saw it, a slight movement near the now-closed door. The room was filled with ghost-like shadows, thanks in part to the silvery light pouring in through the beveled glass window. The distorted images of darkness did nothing to alleviate my fears, and my body tensed, uncertain of what manner of creature dared to enter my very bedroom uninvited. At least I could be certain that whatever it was couldn’t possibly be a vampire. They had to be invited.

“Who’s there!” I all-but snarled into the darkness. Whatever game was being played here, I sure as hell didn’t feel like taking any part in tonight. As if sensing the anger in my tone, the apparition by the doorway took a hesitant step forward.

The first thing that caught my eye was the swirling of the long, flowing white gown. The light from the window reflected off the material; changing the hue of the gown from white to cream to a hundred different variants in between. In some ways, it reminded me of an oyster shell held under direct sunlight -- the glowing beauty of mother of pearl.

But as my line of vision rose higher, I found myself revising my opinion. As my visitor took another step towards me, the gown parted ever-so slightly to grant me just a hint of her legs. The colour of her flesh was only slightly darker than the alabaster-white of her ankle-length nightgown.

I almost groaned in disappointment when she stopped a single pace away from my bed. Once her movements ceased, so did the tantalizing appearance of those milky-white legs that I suddenly wanted wrapped tightly around me. Deep inside, I knew that thought should have disturbed me, but I didn’t seem to care at that particular moment.

Overruled by my rebellious body, my eyes continued their trek upward of their own accord. Seconds passed like hours as my gaze rose slowly along her covered thighs. Only a little farther and I could plainly see the sharper color of white-on-white where her light-coloured panties hid secrets that I wanted desperately to explore. Just past that was her delicate waistline, heavily accentuated by the imperceptible gathers in the long-flowing fabric.

But it was the sight of her breasts that made me moan with desire. Like diamonds rising up above a jewelry setting, her nightgown did nothing to hide the taut flesh that begged for attention. Even through the layer of filmy material, I could see the dark contrast of nipple from the remainder of her breast.

Struggling to get my lust-filled body under control was a losing battle. By the time I tore my gaze away, I was almost panting with desire. I needed to see her...to finally see her face.

And there it was. The pale, soft skin that I knew all too well, the deep green eyes with their limitless depths of compassion over a rosebud of a mouth that constantly begged for kisses. Her beautiful face was haloed gently by the softest, straight red tresses.

“Willow?” I gasped.

From the moment she’d taken that first cautious step forward, there had been no doubt in my mind as to whom my visitor was. As I’d raked -- and practically raped -- her body visually, I never once considered why she’d sought me out in the middle of the night. Unfortunately for both of us, I was long past caring.

God in heaven, she was beautiful.

The silence between us must have unsettled her, though. With all the skittishness of a frightened colt, she began fidgeting nervously.

“I...I shouldn’t have...I...sorry,” she murmered before turning to leave the room.

I was out of bed before she took her first step, grabbing her arm to prevent her from fleeing back into the night. A quiet gasp escaped her as her nerve endings registered my gentle, but preventative grasp. As if realizing that she was well and truly caught, Willow’s head dipped slightly, triggering a cascade of red that effectively hid her face.

“Willow.” I spoke her name as a statement this time, not a question. In all honesty, I didn’t really care what had prompted this visit, but I sure as hell was curious as to why she was ready to run. “Why are you leaving?”

“I...shouldn’t....” Anything else that she whispered remained lost behind that warm veil of red hair.

It didn’t matter, though. Mentally, I was intrigued, and physically? Don’t even ask. Somehow, Willow had found the courage to take the first step in a direction I had never even dared to let myself consider. Now it was up to me to keep her from retreating.

“And why not?” I queried in my most seductive tone of voice.

“I don’t...you don’t...” she stammered.

“Oh, but I *do*,” I insisted. As I spoke, I shifted my grasp, grabbing both of her wrists tenderly. There was little resistance as I brought her hands up to my shoulders. Somehow, I managed to hide my smile as I felt her slightly damp palms come to rest along both of my collar bones.

With a gentle pull, I dragged her hands down along my naked chest. I couldn’t control the small tremor that raced through me as I slowed our mutual descent over my nipples. From the flat of her palm to her slender fingers, the tender friction against my raised flesh increased my desire exponentially.

Willow, however, still refused to meet my eyes. I couldn’t be certain where she was looking under that layer of hair, but I ventured a guess that her eyes were tightly shut. Time, then, to up the ante.

Adding more force to my grip, I manipulated her fingertips to heighten the stimulation to my rapidly tightening skin. After only a few seconds of that blissful touch, I was almost able to forget that the sensation was for the most part self-induced. Closing my eyes to complete the fantasy, I arched my back, thrusting my entire chest toward the source of the stimulus.

Then, an amazing thing happened. As if by accident, those nimble fingers parted slightly as they moved back and forth over my pale skin. Willow continued to follow the gentle rhythm I’d set, almost as if gathering her courage, until finally, she squeezed her fingers together, trapping my sensitized nipples in between them.

For such a small, simple touch, the direct contact hit me like a stray bolt of lightning. The tremor that began at my chest raced through my entire nervous system only to end directly in my groin. Sweet Jesus and Mary, if this was only the beginning, I was going to explode before we could get any further.

A loud groan escaped my lips as the imagery portion of my brain worked overtime to supply detailed -- and graphic -- pictures of just what the rest of my body wanted to occur in the next hour or so.

The noise, however, startled the hell out of Willow, breaking whatever trance had compelled her to touch me of her own free will. Her hands jerked away from my flesh as if they’d suddenly been burnt. Caught unawares, even my vampiric speed couldn’t keep a hold of them as they swiftly retreated harmlessly to her sides.

A throaty noise echoed through the room, and it took a second to figure out that it had come from me. I wasn’t certain whether my pain-filled groan was caused by the loss of her caress or the insistent throbbing coming from below my waistline. Either way, I slowly opened my eyes to assess the situation.

At my first sight of Willow, I almost wished I hadn’t taken the opportunity to look.

On any given day, Willow is beautiful; but at that particular moment, she was absolutely gorgeous. Her skin was flushed -- out of nervousness or arousal, I couldn’t be sure. Whatever the cause, it certainly had no effect on the outcome. The soft blush on her cheeks accentuated not only the moon-kissed red of her hair, but also the warm green of her eyes. As my own gaze dipped lower, it was immediately drawn to the swell of her breasts, rising and falling as she rapidly drew in air.

Like a magnet being drawn to metal, my hands slowly floated upwards, finally coming to rest against the creamy skin of her cheekbones. Taking a moment to savor the feeling of her delicate skin, my hands drifted lower. The smooth curve of her jaw line, the elegant length of her neck, the sharp contour of her collarbone -- all were carefully explored before moving onwards.

As my hands skimmed over the upper part of her chest, my thumbs stumbled over the satin bow fastening of her nightgown. Eyes closed and lost in sensation, Willow was unaware of my fingers gently pulling tail ends of the silky ribbon. As the knot came undone, the soft fabric of her nightgown parted slightly. Although most of her breasts remained covered, it exposed an enticing hint of the curves hidden beneath the fabric.

And I so wanted to go exploring.

Uncertain if Willow was aware of my action, my gaze darted down to her face. I was startled to find green eyes opened, piercing into my own as if seeing straight through me. Instead of looking away, as I so wanted to do; I did my best to use my eyes to convince her to let me continue. It was a long moment before she conveyed her acceptance by slowly, and erotically, I might add, closing her eyes.

With permission sought and granted, my hands, which were still resting loosely above the swells of her breasts, shifted. In one long, unhindered movement, I ran my fingers under the edges of the material. Using patience I didn’t know I possessed, I slowly eased the fabric back.

Oh God. OhGodohGodohGod. The words ran through my mind like a litany as I exposed her breasts to my hungry gaze for the first time. Beautiful. Perfect. I couldn’t think of a single word that came close to describing what I was feeling at that exact moment. Nevertheless, I looked back up to her face to try.

Once again, Willow’s eyes were waiting for me. I could see the nervousness in her expression, uncertain of how I would react to her nudity. Like she had anything to worry about. Long moments stretched out as I attempted to find the right words to tell her what I was thinking, but it was useless. My jaw moved a couple times, but only in a matter of false starts. I could tell that Willow was growing anxious and uncomfortable by the way her eyes darted away from mine. A second later, she was raising her arms to shield her bared breasts from my gaze.

“Don’t.” I said the word softly, but with enough determination for her to know I was serious. “Please. *Please*.”

To emphasize my pleas, I covered her hands with my own and forced them back down to her sides. Once I was certain they would remain there, my own hands returned back to her shoulders to caress the newly exposed flesh I’d uncovered. Over the next few minutes, I felt Willow’s tense muscles finally relax as she grew used to my touch. Only then did I consider picking up where I’d left off in my explorations.

My fingers continued their journey down towards her breasts. Once they reached their destination, I purposely lifted my hands away from her skin. Oh, I was still caressing it, but now the contact was whisper soft. The results were even more amazing than I had dared to hope.

The lighter touch was meant in part to calm Willow, to allow her time to adjust to such an intimate act. Yet, at the same time, the butterfly-like caresses raised a trail of gooseflesh under my wandering fingers. Before my very eyes, I watched as her nipples tightened, as if in sympathy with the rest of her sensitized skin.

My eyes were caught by the hardened buds in a moment that seemed to go on forever. Finally, my hands took on a life of their own as they completed their downward trek. Flattening out my fingers, I used the same maddening, barely noticeable touch as before. Starting with heel, then palm, I drew out the caress by dragging my middle finger from base to tip along her pointed flesh.

From the first instant of contact, a short, gasping moan escaped Willow’s lips. The sound was so erotic, I found myself needing to hear it again...and again, so I raised my hands entirely and performed the same motion over and over. By the fourth pass, Willow was arching her back, unknowingly thrusting her chest forward to increase the pressure. Wanting to see her reaction, I consciously decided to grant her unspoken plea, increasing the pressure of the touch as my hand repeated the now familiar caress.

With the extra stimulation, Willow’s moans of pleasure were slowly graduating into full-blown groans of ecstasy. Caught up in the sensations she was experiencing, Willow’s head rolled back, causing her hair to cascade away from her shoulders in a waterfall of moonlit red. Then it was my turn to groan at the vision before me.

I could literally feel Willow’s body vibrate with previously unknown sexual tension. It was time to take this to the next level of passion.

I dropped to one knee, hoping that Willow wouldn’t notice my shift in position. I needn’t have worried, though. Her sharp, green eyes were closed tight, as if she were trying to limit her sensory input to heighten her sense of touch.

My next movements were simultaneous. On the next downward pass, my hands just kept going until they came gently to rest on her waist. At the same time, I leaned forward. With the greatest care I could muster, I reached out with my tongue to graze one sensitized nipple.

“Ahhh!” It was more a breath than a cry, but it was accompanied by Willow’s hands automatically moving up to grasp the back of my head. Her grip tightened significantly as I drew my lips into an ‘O’ to begin suckling on one of her tempting buds.

Alternating between lips, tongue, and sometimes a combination of the two, I continued to fan the fire that was sweeping through Willow’s nervous system. Just as the stimulation would edge towards the threshold of painful intensity, I would give one nipple a tender, apologetic kiss before moving on to the other.

Sensations were bombarding me rapidly: the cacophony of gasps and sighs from Willow’s lips, the slight, salty taste of her skin, the demanding throbbing from my own needy erection. It was all so overwhelming, I almost missed the moment where Willow’s knees began to buckle.

As soon as she began to sway forward, my hands automatically rose from the inviting curves of her backside that they had unknowingly been exploring. When had that happened, and how did I not realize what I was doing? Taking advantage of our unintentional pause, I took stock of the situation.

At some point in time, Willow’s gossamer nightgown had slipped off her arms to spill around her ankles. It left her wearing only those enticing high-cut panties. My view of her body was obstructed by our proximity, close enough to obscure, but far enough apart to keep our flesh from actually touching.

It’s funny, but I never thought I’d see anything more enchanting than the green in Willow’s eyes, at least that was true until I saw them almost pure black with desire. It was the only encouragement I needed.

Like the predator that I am, I stood swiftly and swept her petite body into my arms. Using every graceful instinct that I had, I carefully placed her on the bed before lowering myself down next to her prone form. As if suddenly realizing where she was, Willow began to squirm nervously, but I wasn’t about to allow her to grow discomforted.

“Shhussh,” I soothed, but nevertheless, I still stumbled through the next part of what I wanted to say. “I...I want this, Willow. I want you...so badly, please...”

Brave words. Willow had yet to give me her permission to continue, but by that point I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stop, even if she asked. It was almost as if I was being consumed by my wanting. It was a hunger burning far out of my limited control, one that grew quickly with each passing second.

“*Please*.” I almost winced when I heard the yearning desperation in my voice, but it was the vocalization of everything that I felt at that exact moment.

After a long pause, Willow gave me her answer by raising her head and pressing her lips to mine. Although it was far from forceful, there was definitely no hesitation in her kiss. It wasn’t long before our tongues met through open lips, eager to tease and play against each other.

While our mouths were busy exploring, my hands were far from idle. Needing to feel more of her, I blindly reached forward until my fingers brushed against the silken expanse of her thigh. Feeling the tenseness in the muscles there, I began kneading the supple flesh under my hands, willing it to relax.

Our kisses were growing more urgent in the meantime, and I could sense Willow growing breathless from the lack of necessary oxygen. Reluctantly, I drew away from her mouth with a string of loud, wet kisses that continued down the length of her jaw. Only when I reached the long, elegant line of her neck did I feel her tense briefly before losing herself in my delicate nuzzling of her warm, tempting flesh.

My hand was drifting upward of its own accord, drawn to the secret that lay hidden beneath the final layer of Willow’s clothing. It wasn’t long before my fingers brushed against the cotton barrier, and with a gentle touch they traced along the elastic edge. As my hand dipped lower into the valley between her legs, Willow and I both gasped loudly. While she was undoubtedly reacting to this new sensation, I was groaning over the warm dampness I detected.

Oh Christ, I wanted her, to bury myself within her, to make her mine.

‘Not yet!’ I scolded myself silently for being such a selfish bastard. There was still so much that I wanted to show her, to make her experience first. This was Willow, after all, and she deserved everything I could give her, and more.

Much to my surprise, however, Willow’s body was begging me to continue. I had no idea whether or not she was aware of it, but Willow’s hips were rocking upwards rhythmically, as if silently pleading for my touch. I wasn’t about to deny either of us that which we both needed so badly.

My fingers made a few gentle passes over the damp cloth of her panties. As a result, Willow’s involuntary thrusts became more demanding with each stroke of my hand. It was difficult to tell which one of us was more inflamed by my gentle teasing, but in the end, I was the one who gave into baser needs first.

Once again, my hand dipped between Willow’s thighs, but instead of continuing its trek upwards, my fingers curled under the edge of the material. To increase her pleasure, I chose that same moment to lower my lips back to one of her rock-hard nipples.

“Angel!” Willow cried out at the double assault. Her back arched upwards as my fingers explored the slick folds under the steamy layer of cotton. “Oh God... Angel!” Those were her last coherent words for quite some time. After that, she regressed into a long series of moans and sighs. Not that I minded. In fact, I took great pleasure in causing those erotic sounds.

“Aahhhhhh!” Willow’s loud groan echoed throughout the room as my fingers brushed against the nerve-filled nub of her clitoris for the first time. Shifting my hand slightly, I adjusted it so that I could use my thumb to rub over the sensitive bud while my fingers continued to stroke the flesh below it.

My hand soon grew wet with her juices. A burning desire rippled through me to taste that which flowed so copiously from her. With a last, parting kiss; my mouth began its journey downwards, teasing the flesh it traversed with small nips and hungry, sweeping licks.

The cloth of her panties was starting to chaff against my wet fingers, so I took just a moment to ease them down, then finally off her legs. The moon cast more than enough light for me to see the tantalizing red curls covering her pubic mound. With her underwear finally removed, my fingers ran through the coarse hair before returning to the more alluring flesh below. Shivers raced through Willow’s body, though I doubted seriously that they were caused by her new-found nudity.

Although I could have taken her over the edge with my hand, I already had another idea in mind. To make it work, however, I needed to move. Neither my mouth nor my hand ceased their respective actions as I used my knee to coax her legs into spreading further apart. Continuing with my kisses to her stomach, I shifted my body over her leg and settled into the waiting space I’d just cleared.

With my shins resting flat against the mattress, my hands were free to roam across her body at will. As my mouth drifted lower, my palms came to rest against the tender flesh of her thighs. Only then did Willow’s nervousness manifest itself, as if she suddenly realized how opened and exposed she was. Her discomfort was plainly visible in both the tension stiffening her body and the white- knuckle grip she maintained on two fistfuls of the sheets.

“Shh,” I hushed as she tried to bring her legs together. Between my vocal coaxing and the reverse pressure I was applying to her thighs, I managed to keep her from resisting. Yet, her moment of indecision left her entire body tense, and that was something I wasn’t about to allow.

Dropping my head down, I pressed my tongue forward for a slow, sweeping lick of Willow’s delicate folds. I was rewarded with a harsh, jerking roll of her hips, accompanied by a short cry of surprise. It was difficult not to just bury my mouth back into her awaiting haven, but I forced myself to simply be content with the taste of her wetness that my tongue had just gathered. I may have forced Willow to let me sample her, but I was going to make her ask in the event that she wanted me to continue.

She did not disappoint.

“Angel...please...oh God...please...,” Willow begged as her hips arched upward in search of my mouth.

Unwilling to deny either of us another moment longer, I lowered my head. The taste of her exploded against my tongue like the finest of champagnes. It was addictive, and after the first sweep of my tongue, I knew that I was hooked.

With great care, I explored every inch of her, lapping greedily at the wetness her body was weeping. Wanting more of that heady dew, I moved one of my hands from its perch on her thigh in order to press a single finger into the waiting warmth of her tight passage. Without my hand to restrain her, Willow’s hips began thrusting in earnest. Only then did I allow my tongue to travel upward in search of the one place that would take her over the edge.

The first instant my tongue grazed over that sensitive bundle of nerves struck Willow like a bolt of lightening. Crying out in both pleasure and surprise, her hands involuntarily flew to the back of my head. The feeling of her fingers grabbing two handfuls of my hair was inflaming, transcending the brief moment of pain to increase the intense pleasure I was already experiencing.

Wanting desperately to bring Willow to the same plateau of pleasure I was on, I concentrated my attention on the task at hand. Until that point, I’d simply been sweeping my tongue against her. It was time now to pull one of my favourite techniques out of my sexual arsenal.

Focusing carefully, I controlled my movements. Like the wings of a butterfly as they pass almost undetected through the air, I allowed my tongue only short, barely discernable contact where Willow desired it the most. Her escalating cries of pleasure were echoed by the clenching of her internal muscles against my still-buried finger.

Then it happened.

For just an instant, Willow’s body froze completely. Her thrusts, her moans, even her breathing -- all of it came to an abrupt halt. It was almost as if she was determined not to allow even the most minute sensation to distract her as she reached the pinnacle I’d been leading her to. Given the unnatural stillness of her body, I almost believed that time itself had stopped in homage to this amazing girl --*woman* -- as she experienced her first bout of shared pleasure.

And then, with a keening wail, an equal mixture of agony and ecstasy, she was coming. My tongue was relentless as I continued to lick her throbbing clit. The feeling of her tight passage as it throbbed around my finger nearly brought me over the edge as well. Only my desperate need to take her completely dragged me away from the temptation to spill myself at that very moment.

Seconds or centuries, I don’t know how long it lasted -- and I didn’t really care, either -- as I extended her ecstasy. Only when I felt her hands urge my head away did I cease my ministrations to her now overly stimulated clit. Shivers continued to course through her body, both inside and out as I lapped up the evidence of her pleasure that had accumulated on my hand. It was awkward, licking at my own knuckles, but I left my finger lodged within her, loving the thrill of Willow’s passage erratically spasming against it from the aftershocks of her orgasm.

There aren’t enough words to describe what I felt at that moment: knowing that *I* was the one who’d brought her such pleasure, hearing her cry out *my* name as her passion peaked, feeling her body tremble as a result of *my* loving. Selfish? Not really. It had been as much for Willow as it had been for me -- if not more.

But now my own body was aching for attention. Willow was still reeling from the intensity of her orgasm. Her flushed skin glistened in the moonlight from the sheen of passion-induced perspiration. My eyes were involuntarily drawn to the rapid rise and fall of her breasts as she continued to pant for much-needed air. Sensitized by her recent orgasm, her nipples stood out like diamonds.

Seeing her like this -- knowing that I’d been the one to send her to this plateau -- was too much for me. I couldn’t wait any longer. I simply *had* to have her.

Withdrawing my finger slightly, I found what I was both hoping and dreading would be there -- the thin membrane that proclaimed her a virgin. I was proud and somehow pleased to learn that she was still an innocent; yet, at the same time, I felt in some way unworthy of wanting to steal her virginity away without giving her anything in return. Don’t get me wrong. She wasn’t, by any means, the first virgin I’d deflowered; but never before had I felt such conflicting emotions over the thought of being somebody’s ‘first’.

Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I rested my head against one of her shapely thighs and called her name softly. Still basking in the afterglow of such a powerful orgasm, she answered me with a simple ‘hmm?’

“I want you...to be...in...side you.” At the sound of my voice, Willow’s eyes popped open. Damn. With a few simple words I’d managed to chase away every last trace of the contentment on her face. Even worse, the expression that replaced it was filled with fear. At the sight of her obvious nervousness, I felt my own desire ease back a fraction. Using willpower that I didn’t know I possessed, I managed to force the next words out of my mouth. “It...you...uh...we don’t have to go any further if it’s not what you want.”

‘YES WE DO!’ my body screamed at me. I only pray that Willow never learns just how close I was to mindlessly plunging myself into her, seeking my own release whether she was willing or not. I felt as if I’d been hard forever. Even the soft cotton of the bed linen was torture where it rubbed against my overstimulated flesh. I wanted nothing more than to drill myself into her body and find some relief, and if I could bring her along for the ride, all the better.

But I couldn’t...wouldn’t do that to her. What I was feeling for her was an entirely new experience for me. For the first time in my entire worthless life, I’d found something that was more important to me than my own quest for personal happiness. No matter what compulsion my body drove me towards, the choice was ultimately going to be Willow’s.

Unfortunately, the girl in question was totally unaware of the momentous conclusion I’d drawn.

Long moments passed as her green eyes bore into my own, as if searching for something hidden deep within me. I felt myself sinking a little deeper into despair, knowing that the lust that had consumed her was fading away with each second that passed. Resigned to the inevitable outcome, I closed my eyes to break the connection between us.

In the span of a single heartbeat, Willow launched herself at me, her mouth unerringly finding my own. With a wanton hunger I would have never suspected her capable of, Willow kissed me from the very depths of her soul. It was as if she were trying possess me with her tongue, using it to plunge and plunder my mouth in a frighteningly accurate mimicry of lovemaking.

Needing to breathe, Willow pulled away all too soon, but she didn’t go far. The warm air of her rapid exhalations caressed my lips as she spoke the word I so wanted to hear.

“Yes,” Willow managed to gasp before returning to my waiting mouth.

Oh God, how was it that, with all the lovers I’d had before, I’d never before realized just how sensual kissing could be? As our passion escalated, our mouths grew more greedy. Gentleness became a thing of the past as our lips clashed and pressed with a growing ferocity, until even that wasn’t enough. Using my free hand, I tangled my fingers into her hair, pressing against the back of head to urge her even closer. I just simply couldn’t get enough of her.

Eventually Willow pulled away gasping, literally, for breath. I was too far gone to let that slow me down, though, as I buried my face in the slender line of her neck.

My other hand was far from idle. Crooking my finger, I searched for the elusive place deep inside her. A guttural cry ripped from her throat when I finally found the proper spot. That cry was followed by a steady stream of moans as I moved my thumb to rub steadily against the sensitive nub of her clitoris.

Arching her back, Willow’s hips rocked up and down in time to the rhythm set by my determined stroking. Time and time again I brought her to the very edge of release, using her clenching internal muscles to judge just how far to take her. Until finally, she could take no more.

“Angel! Please...I need...I...oh God...please!” she begged in between gasps.

Although I half-hoped that Willow would be curious enough to want to explore my body as I’d just explored hers; my desire to possess her was too overwhelming. I wanted her, *needed* her with a yearning that was more powerful than any other I could remember in my lifetime.

It was time.

I couldn’t help the pang of reluctance I felt as I slid my now-pruned finger from her moist, steamy depths. Leaning forward, I showered her mouth with gentle, yet urgent, kisses as I shifted my body into place between her legs. Lowering one arm to rest next to her head, I used the other to guide myself to her waiting entrance. Taking great care, I rested my swollen flesh at the very edge of her passage as I took one final look at her beautiful face.

Willow’s eyes widened slightly as she felt my hardness against her slick folds. It was as if she had just realized exactly what was about to occur, and that knowledge made me pause.

“Last chance, Willow. We can stop...” I left my statement unfinished, not out of any sense of chivalry, but out of sheer selfishness. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure if I *could* back away now. On the other hand, though, I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t give her one final chance to make sure that this was truly what she wanted.

There was an eternity of silence before she spoke.

“Just...go slow, okay?”

Smiling tenderly, I gave a shallow nod of my head in agreement. Giving her a soothing kiss, I tensed my muscles in preparation.

“I love you, Willow. Always remember that.” I whispered the truthful words softly against her lips...

...then thrust deeply into her body.

Willow’s pain-filled cry gave me a perverse sense of elation -- not that I’d hurt her, but that I was the *only* one who would ever hear it. It was mine and mine alone.

The thought died a quick death as sensation overwhelmed me.

Oh God. Oh Christ.

I froze involuntarily, lost in the warmth and comfort that was Willow. She was incredibly tight, her inner muscles spasming as they tried to cope with my intruding flesh. It was fantastic beyond description.

A thousand different emotions swam in my head as I waited -- agony as I fought my body’s relentless urges to move, ecstasy in the knowledge of what lay ahead, unabashed pride that Willow had chosen me to be her first lover, self-recrimination for not being worthy of such an honor, self-reproach that I’d caused her pain, no matter how unavoidable, and finally pure, unadulterated need. It was the last part that finally won the emotional battle waging within me.

Opening eyes that I didn’t realize I’d closed, I looked down at the beautiful girl below me. Despite the pain she had just experienced, Willow’s face looked more curious than anything else. I could almost picture her mind as it recorded every emotion, every nuance, every sensation to be sorted through at a later time.

Too many thoughts...

...that I couldn’t, wouldn’t allow.

With a flash of insight, I realized that if Willow was able to think that clearly, then she was ready to continue. Groaning loudly, I pulled back only to press forward again, setting a slow, gentle rhythm for the time being.

Lost in sensation, Willow remained motionless for a few moments before her instincts took over control of her body. Then she came alive.

Loud moans and sighs filled the air as she matched me thrust for thrust. Determined to take her over the edge, I clamped down on my urge to find my own pleasure first. Changing my angle, I used my hardness to tease that ultra-sensitive place deep inside her. Willow’s nail raked down my back even as her wails escaped her lips.

A fine sheen of sweat covered both of us as I drove her body to the brink over and over again. Varying the speed of my strokes, I would take us both to the edge, only to back off only moments before completion. Willow babbled a steady stream of broken pleas for release until she reached the point where teasing finally became torment.

When we approached the pinnacle this time, I didn’t slow down. Shifting my arm slightly, I ran my fingers along her hair as I spoke.

“Come for me, Willow. Come for me,” I demanded, my words matching the cadence set by my hips.

“Oh! Ohh! Ohhhhh!” She cried as her orgasm began to overwhelm her. Willow’s eyes closed and her chin rose as her head pressed back into the pillow beneath it. Then she was falling, spiraling into ecstasy and taking me with her.

Willow’s internal muscles were contracting all around my length. Between the relentless throbbing of her passage and her breathy moans, I was well and truly lost. Desperate for my own completion, I abandoned the tempered, even strokes that had just sent Willow over the edge. My hips continued to move, losing all traces of gentleness as I pistoned into her erratically. And then it was too late. Need. Burning. Lust. Desire.

“WILLLLOOOOWWWWW!” Her name exploded from my lips the same way my semen erupted from my body. From that point on, the force of my orgasm rendered me incapable of anything more than the groans of pleasure that accompanied each pulse of my release.

Panting from exertion, I opened my eyes.....

...and howled in outrage!

“Not again, Goddamn it! NOT AGAIN!” I screamed into the dark, empty expanse of my bedroom. My fists pounded against the mattress in frustration. Unfortunately, the soft bedding did nothing to soothe the rage I was experiencing.

The glaring light from my digital alarm clock had the misfortune of catching my attention, taunting the time as six in the morning. Before I could think twice, my fist slammed down upon it, pulverizing the plastic-and-metal housing of the damned thing. Another sweep of my hand caught the antique stained-glass lamp next to the clock, sending it crashing to the floor already shattered.

Once I’d exhausted the supply of breakable objects within my reach, I began the long, slow process of calming down. Feeling every one of my 242 years, I buried my face tiredly into my hands.

Six days. Six dreams. Always the same -- in every vivid, Technicolor detail. Hell, even my memories weren’t as clear, despite my vampire-enhanced recollection. But, to my eternal frustration, this was no memory, only wishful thinking on the part of my overactive subconscious.

It was driving me crazy.

*She* was driving me crazy.

Oh God, this couldn’t be happening. Had I learned nothing from my entire disastrous relationship with Buffy? Apparently not for, no matter how hard I tried to deny and ignore it, one thing was painfully clear.

I was falling in love with Willow Rosenburg.

Now what the hell was I going to do?

~~~~finis, for now~~~~