Title: The Query Series
Author: NyxMne Chaosis
Email: magmyr@umailme.com
Distribution: SFA
Rating: PG-13 (NC-17 in parts for character death)
Setting: Post-Lover's Walk (Season 3)/Pre-Harsh Light of Day (Season 4)
Summary: After his drunken fiasco in "Lover's Walk", Spike returns to Brazil to woo back Dru.
Disclaimer: Joss owns all.

Xander's Query


Six months and still nothing. Not even a phone call. Xander suspected the worse about his life long friend. Wherever Willow was, she wasn't coming back, either because she didn't want to or because she was being held against her will. Xander liked to the think it was the latter situation, but that always made him shudder at the possibility of what Willow might be enduring.

A rage shook, Xander as he washed what few mismatched dishes he had. Another plate fell from his wet hand and smashed on the floor. If he kept this up, he wouldn't have any dishes by the end of the week. And his mother wouldn't give him anymore, even though he saw boxes of old dishes in the basement beside his makeshift bed.

After drying his hands, he crashed on his bed and flipped through old albums filled with photos of him and Will and the Buffster. There were some with Giles and Oz as well, but one particular photo was his favorite.

It was taken several years ago, when Willow's hair was still a deep auborne and still long. In the picture she looked toward the camera, her hair spilling over her should, a pleasant smile on her face.

Eagerly, he peeled back the transparent flap that protected the photo. He touched the photo softly, wishing that she would return, wishing there was something he could do. Between Giles, Buffy, Oz and himself, they had exhausted every avenue and found nothing. Even location rituals had only revealed scattered and misguided directions to indeterminate places. Once, a location ritual led them to the center of the Sunnydale shopping mall. Another time, to a freshly dug grave, in which there was a mad race to unbury the casket only to face a newly turned vampire.

After several failed attempts, what was left of the Scooby Gang hit the books again. More research revealed that this particular amulet had a scattering effect on the person it transported. Location rituals would be powerless to find Willow. Xander sighed.

Everyone seemed to have given up. He didn't know if they meant it or were even aware of it, but Giles and Buffy talked about Willow as if she were dead. "I'll never think that," Xander proclaimed. As for Oz, he didn't seem to say much at all these days.

Reaching across the bed, Xander grabbed a marker and uncapped it. At the bottom of the picture, he wrote:


Dear Willow:

Wherever you are,
I will never stop thinking about you,
never forget my life-long friend,
never stop wondering what happened to you.

Love Xander


In his funny own way, he had always loved her. Then he had missed his chance, and ultimately destroyed Cordelia's trust in him as a result of trying to reclaim someone who wasn't his to begin with. He wouldn't do it again. In Willow's memory, he promised to live life to its fullest, to embrace the opportunities before they slipped away. No more regrets.

Replacing the transparent page. Xander closed the album, reached across the bed, and dialed his phone. After several rings, the phone picked up at the other end.

"Hey Anya, whatcha doing?"