Title: Weeping Willow
Author: Annanara
Email: ananara@aol.com
Summary: A cursed Willow disappears, leaving a saddened Xander behind.
Distribution: Please e-mail the author
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, Joss does. However, I do own the poem. (I can't believe I just admitted that...)

Willow weeps, her leaves
Drag on the ground
Sighing...waiting for her lost love
Who has yet to come


I stood at the edge of the park, wondering again, what has become of my Willow. Gone two weeks now, I could not find her. Nobody could, not even Buffy. Not even Angel. Not even me, his mind whispered back.

Sighing, I watch the sun as it rises above the horizon. Gone...two weeks and one day, exactly. The last time I saw her, her hair was as red as the rising sun. Her eyes, wide with terror at the curse the mage had put upon her. Not even the calm of the sunrise could keep her fear at bay, nor the knowledge that the day had beat back the night again, could console her. She fled from us, not able to face the astonished looks on all our faces.

She had attacked the mage first, taking the curse of whoever hit him first onto herself. I had know why. I called her later, asking her why. All she said was that she had to do it. She couldn't allow Buffy or me, or any of the others to get cursed.

I also heard what she mumbled right before hanging up.

"Everybody else would be missed."

I heard the click as her phone hung up. I felt as if I would be sick then and there. Did Willow think we cared so little for her?! I ran over to her house, but it was too late. The door to her house was wide open and there was a small note saying she was running away.

I remember crying, I remember calling Buffy and the others. I remember them coming to comfort me. Then, I remember nothing. Nothing buy my past with her. Willow. My best friend.


Free the birds
In the gilded cage
Let them fly to the sky
Through the air to land
Upon this weeping willow tree


As I walk into my room it seems so odd. After her fish fetish, she got a bird. She always did love animals. Well, almost all. Frogs seemed to instill some strange fear in her. At least real frogs did.

But she loved the stuffed ones. My eyes catch the stuffed frog I gave to her on her 11th birthday. Maybe it wasn't so much that it was stuffed, but rather that it was from me. I quickly squash that idea. It wouldn't have worked out between us...right? I can't help but wonder.

Quickly, I open the cage to feed Tweety. She never was original, but it did seem to fit her yellow parakeet. Mumbling to myself, I look for Tweety's food. Never could find a darn thing in this room...maybe I should clean it sometime...

Hearing a swift "shoom" behind me, I see an empty cage and an open window. "Oh man...Willow's gonna kill me!" Willow's gone...my heart reminds me. I sag and flop onto the bed. I feel the tears beginning again. Nobody can save me from this heartache...the one who can is now gone...


Oh birds, have pity
On such a sad state of a tree
Bring her flowers, bring her life
For all to see
So they may come
And see her beauty


After about an hour of crying my not-so manly eyes out, I grabbed the butterfly net Willow and I had used to catch fireflies during the summer. Time to find Tweety. I searched almost every little corner of Sunnydale for one bird. Looking into the sky, it's almost evening.

Have I really spent most of the day outside looking for one small bird?? But, that blasted bird was important. What if Willow does come back? She's not coming back, I hear myself chant. Better not to get my hopes up only to be let down. It's time I moved on. But, everytime I hear a whisper in the wind, I think I hear Willow's voice...

There! Tweety! I run to the bush, my net ready. Suddenly, I'm ten again and Willow's by my side. I quickly bring down the net. Unfortunately, it wasn't quick enough. Tweety raced through the sky, carrying a rosebud in his little beak.

How the heck does a bird that small carry a rosebud?! Shaking my head, I go off after the jailbird. Must be the Hellmouth, is all I can think of. I'm fairly certain Giles would love to know about this. He'd probably end up giving the same explanation. It's gotta be the Hellmouth.


Weeping willow, weep no more
You have friends, great and small
Do not break and do not fall
Bend with the force of it all


What the? I felt a raindrop fall upon my head. Looking up, the sky had gone dark, plunging me into night. Running as fast as I can, I try to make my way home. Unfortunately for me, the vamps are out early. Spotting one, and one spotting me, I run in the opposite direction. Towards the park.


Little birds, I wish to thank thee
You will be my friends, please say yes you'll be
But my love he can not be
For he will never meet me


Running, I occasionally see flashes of yellow streak across the sky. Soon, it seems, the whole night sky is awash in a multitude of colored birds. Blue and red and yellow and black. All rushing around hurriedly. I dropped to the ground as one came at me. Or maybe it wasn't. Looking back, I see the birds attacking the vampire. It all seemed very Alfred Hitchcock.

This is the Hellmouth, this is the hellmouth, I kept chanting to myself. I'm not going crazy, I'm not going crazy. If Willow was around, she'd think I was crazy. I felt my heart skip a beat. In one moment I realize why I went after Tweety so quickly. It gave me something to do. It made me not think about Willow.

Wiping my eyes, I try to keep the rain from getting into them. And to keep the tears from getting out. Find Tweety...find Tweety..., I repeat. Forget Willow? No, never.


My sad heart breaks
Though my spirit will not
I wish to thank you
For all your support


With the sky still open and pouring, like my own wounds, I try to find some shade. Somewhere I can hide till it stops raining. Until you stop cyring...

I sniff and head off towards a tree. It looks more like a twig, but it'll have to do. It's the only substantial protection from the rain.

Sitting underneath it's meager leaves, I see the old brown outlines of hearts and initials. The lovers' tree, it was called. Everyone who had their first boyfriend or girlfriend put their initials on this tree. Tracing the initials, I find I know most of them.. Though, the pairings that had been listed on the tree hadn't lasted very long. We were all young then, never knowing what a real relationship entailed. Friendship, respect, compromise, love. All the things Willow and I had.

Then why did you let her get away?! I yelled at myself. It wasn't until later that I realized what we had.

Letting my tired eyes roam around the park, something catches my eye. A willow tree surrounded by flowers. Funny, I never noticed that before...


And flowers, growing
Stay and be my company
I will watch
I will protect
Your soft and delicate petals
Under my branches


Deciding it offered -much- better protection from the rain, I make a mad dash for the tree. Gently pushing the branches aside, I sit down at the base of the tree. The curtain like protection of the branchs kept the inside remarkably dry. Feeling safe and secure, I try to fight off the drowsiness that overtakes me.


Your green leaves and color
Are sure to bring him to me
And finally I will be happy
For he will finally see me


Birds...chirping...

"I don't want to get up Mom..."

"Xander...time to wake up..."

"Willow?!" I wake with a start. I whip my head around, trying to find Willow. She's gone you moron, my mind yells again. Sitting up I untangle myself from the blanket of warm branches and leaves.

Leaves?? When did this happen? Gently, to make sure I don't crush any of the flowers around me, I get up from my resting place.

What the...No, I'm not going to think about it. I cut off all thoughts about how flowers that weren't there the night before suddenly popped out of the ground. Though, it did make an eerie body outline from where I slept.

Instead of leaving, I find myself just standing. This willow tree...it seems to magical to me. Just like Willow... But she's gone. I sigh and gently stroke the soft bark of the tree.

"Thanks for shelter," I whisper. Suddenly feeling self-conscious, I rush out from under the tree. Walking for home and a hot shower, I can't help but take one more look at the willow tree hiding in the park. For a second, just one split second, I could have sworn I saw reddish-gold leaves in the morning light...