Chapter 5 - May 2007

Over the next year, William emailed Buffy frequently. She hardly ever answered him, but he saw that she accepted his mail, so he was encouraged to continue. He wrote her funny stories about demons he encountered, and anecdotes about some of the crazy theater people he knew. He didn’t phone her, or in any other way intrude upon her life. He received a lot of email from Willow and Tara these days about their pending adoption. Willow wrote him that Buffy was having a lot of difficulty with the Watcher’s Council over Giles’ pension. They hadn’t assigned her a new watcher, since at 25, she was deemed too old to need one, but then they treated her like a wayward child, rather than a grown woman, and a widow in need of income. Fortunately, she still had Giles’ interest in the Magic Box, which Anya now managed, and which was very successful. With a small child at home, she really wasn’t in a position to go to work. It was all very difficult, but Buffy was managing like the trouper she was. Luckily, the Hellmouth was going through one of its quiet spells; most vampire activity had ceased.

William had broken up with Holly shortly after returning to New York, but she had proven helpful in one little matter. William had noticed that she had a small stuffed frog on her bed. It was made of some shiny material, and it reminded him of Emily. He asked Holly where she got it and she explained that it was a vintage Beanie Baby, toys that had been popular several years ago. With some effort, he was able to find a duplicate and send it to Emily. Thereafter, whenever he saw a funny or unusual frog, he mailed it to her. He pictured her giggling each time she received a mysterious package from ‘Willyum’.

Meanwhile, William’s unlife continued as before. A new butcher shop opened right near his apartment, so he made a deal with the owner for fresh blood every week. The convenient blood supply was helpful, because suddenly "Spike" was so busy that he hardly had time to stop in. An increase in demonic activity meant that his answering machine was full of messages every morning. He wished that he could find an assistant like Gunn, but where did one advertise for such a person?

One day, about a year after Giles’ death, Spike sent Buffy the following email:

Hi Buffy,

It’s been a long time since I have seen anything truly frightening in a graveyard, but last night I saw something which would have made my blood run cold, if it wasn’t already. Ha Ha. I was lurking in a small graveyard, downtown, where there was a report of vampire activity. There was a small bench in one corner of the cemetery, and as I was watching from behind a crypt, I saw a young girl, about 14 years old, accompanied by an older woman come in and sit down on it. At first, I figured that they were mourners, but they seemed to be waiting for something, and what is there to wait for in a graveyard, except one thing? Sure enough, a vampire rose from the grave near them, and the girl took a stake out of her bag and attacked him. She wasn’t very good, clumsy as an ox, but she got the job done with much encouragement from the older woman. For one awful moment, I thought that a new Slayer had been called! But as I watched them, I realized that this girl was no slayer. She didn’t have the moves or the strength. I guess that she was a slayer in training. The woman was one of those sour faced Watcher types. No offense to Giles, he wasn’t quite standard issue. The girl was cute enough, all knees and elbows and a shock of red hair and freckles, but she didn’t have a tenth of your style. Anyway, I just wanted you to know about her, in case it means anything. Hope you are all well. Love to the Tadpole. William

To his surprise, he actually got an answer back, the following day.

William,

It’s funny that you should mention a new Slayer in training, because I’ve just heard from the CoW on that very topic. It seems that a new Hellmouth has opened up... Guess where? That’s right, you have been complaining about being overworked... now you know why. Anyway, I guess the one in Sunnydale is dying out or closing up, or whatever they do. I haven’t even seen a vampire in a month. Well, the CoW, in their infinite wisdom, wants to retire me, and call this new Slayer in New York. It seems to be the condition under which they will release Giles' pension. Don’t get me started on that topic. Anyway, they’ve never had to retire a Slayer. They usually just bury them, but they think they know how to accomplish it, as long as I am willing. In the meantime, they want me to come to New York for a week to meet with this girl - her name is Tina, by the way - and give her something no Slayer has ever had, which is feedback from an actual living Slayer. Her watcher’s name is Priscilla Scott. Is there some rule that Watchers have to have funny first names? Anyway, Dawn has been bugging me about letting her move to New York to become an actress but I want her to graduate from college first. After all, *I* managed to graduate, even though I was so pregnant that my gown didn’t fit! But Berkeley is out for the summer so I told her that she could come with me to New York to try it out for a week. This is probably going to be a big mistake. The bad news is that I am going to have to leave Emily home. I will be too busy and it is too dangerous here for her to come. Xander and Anya are going to take her. I hate leaving her... I’ve never done it before, but it is only for a week. Anyway, I will be in New York, staying at the Hyatt Regency (at least the CoW were generous about that. Guilt is a wonderful thing!) from Monday, May 21 to Sunday, May 27. Maybe we can get together if you are not too busy.

I also want to thank you, William. I know I have been a lousy correspondent. But your letters are all that have kept me sane this past year. Also, Emily loves the frogs. The other night we were watching this old movie, ‘The Ten Commandments’ with Charton Heston. Anyway, they had this plague of frogs... frogs everywhere, and Emily said, "That looks like my room!" She is so funny. But anyway, she loves the frogs. That was so kind of you. See you soon. Buffy

Buffy was coming to New York! That was bloody incredible! And she sounded like she wanted to see him. Now don’t get your hopes up, he told himself, she is just being polite. Still, it would be great to see her and Dawn again and to show them around the City. New York at night was a far cry from Sunnydale or even LA. A vampire could have a full social life here. Maybe he could score some theater tickets. Of course his calendar for the next two weeks was full to overflowing thanks to this new Hellmouth. Now would be a good time for that assistant. Wonder if Buffy would feel up to a bit of slaying this trip... Kind of a busman’s holiday, but it was worth a shot.

Buffy and Dawn arrived in late afternoon. They checked into their hotel and were very impressed.

"Wow... this place is totally cool. Look out the window, Buffy. You can see Times Square. Can we get room service, do you think? Wait... there’s a little refrigerator and it’s full of stuff! Is it free? " She took out a can of Diet Coke and opened it.

"Dawn, Dawn...What are you…12? Calm down, okay? I am so tired that I can’t keep my eyes open." Buffy lay down on one of the double beds. "Why don’t you read the guide book or watch TV for a while. I will be ready for action in just a little…"

"Right," said Dawn. Her sister was asleep. She hadn’t slept last night, apparently, and saying goodbye to Emily had been very traumatic. Let her sleep for a while, but she, Dawn was going exploring. Who needs a guide book when Times Square is right outside your window?

It was fully dark when Buffy awoke. Dawn was gone. Concerned, Buffy went downstairs to the lobby, which was on the 7^th floor surrounding a giant atrium. This is a very confusing hotel, thought Buffy. How could she begin to find Dawn in this place? She went down to street level, and then outside the big doors. Times Square was packed with people, milling around outside on this warm spring evening; it was overwhelming for a girl used to a one Starbucks town like Sunnydale. Where could Dawn be? Why hadn’t she returned before it got dark? Could she have gotten lost? This place was crawling with demons and vampires, according to William. William. He might have some ideas. She took the glass elevator to her room and dialed his number from the business card he had given her.

William had cancelled his appointments this evening in hope that Buffy would call when she got into New York so, when he heard her voice on the phone, he rejoiced. "William, Dawn is missing," however, were not the words he wanted to hear. He called a cab, and raced over to the Hyatt. He had removed a Gak demon from their atrium a few months ago, so he was greeted effusively by the concierge. Buffy met him in the lobby, looking very worried. Just seeing her again brought a lump to his throat. She looked much better then she had a year ago, which was to be expected. Her streaked blonde hair was tied back with a scarf, and she was dressed in a navy blue sweater and slacks. Right now, she was all business.

"William... I’m so glad you came. I can’t imagine where she could have gone. I fell asleep when we got in, and she must have gotten bored and gone to explore. But this is New York City! In Sunnydale, when Dawn disappeared, there were like three places to look! I mean, what was she thinking?"

"Don’t worry, pet. We’ll find her. She’s not a child anymore, you know."

"I know that she’s twenty years old, but she’s not a very mature twenty year old."

"She goes away to college, right?" Buffy nodded. "Well, then trust me, she’s more mature than you think!"

"Hi guys! Hi William! Isn’t this place great?" Dawn was standing there, her arms laden with shopping bags. "Sorry I was gone so long, but New York is SO exciting! I went to all these cool shops, and I got some CDs and some great posters for my room at school, and I think I saw Allan Cummings outside the theater where the musical ‘Hannibal’ is playing. But they are all sold out for the whole time that we’re here, damn it! So what are you doing down here? Am I really late?"

"Dawn!" Buffy began. William shot her a glance and shook his head.

"Well, maybe you can help me, Dawn, since you know your way around here now. I was hoping to take two beautiful women out to dinner. Do you know where I can find any?" he said, bowing with mock gallantry.

Dawn laughed. "Spike, you are so weird. I just have to drop all this stuff off upstairs. Back in a few!" she sang out as she dashed for the elevator.

"William… you really don’t have to do that. I feel bad enough calling you out here when you must be so busy."

"No problem, Buffy. I just juggled a few things. And I did want to take you two out while you were here. Now’s as good a time as any... unless you have other plans."

"Nope... I don’t have to meet Tina and Priscilla until tomorrow. Where shall we go?"

"Well, upstairs in this hotel is a revolving restaurant with views of the whole city. They, uh, know me there."

"Oh?" Buffy raised her eyebrows.

"Killed a Gak demon in the atrium."

"Oh well. Dawn will be thrilled."

Dawn was thrilled. She, Buffy and William had a festive dinner, looking out the windows as the restaurant slowly revolved. William ate shrimp cocktail while he told them all about all the recent demon sightings and vampire problems that had been keeping him so busy the past few months.

"That’s why it’s not a good idea for you to go wanderin’ off by yourself, pet," he said to Dawn seriously. "It used to be ordinary muggers and thieves after your bread, but now there are creatures out there after your blood. Or worse. So no goin’ out by yourself after dark, okay, nibblet?"

"Okay, Spike, on one condition… that you stop calling me nibblet! I’m 20 now."

"That you are. So have you got any career opportunities lined up for when you’re here? Auditions?"

Dawn looked down. "Well, no. I didn’t know who to call or what to do."

"Well, first you’ve got to get Backstage magazine. That’ll give you some info on what’s what. Also, I have somethin’ that you might be interested in."

"What?" Dawn’s eyes lit up.

"Well, a uh, friend of mine named, uh, Holly is directing this little one act. It’s off Off-Broadway, you understand, but she’s having auditions this week, and I got you in. You have a headshot and resume?"

"Of course," said Dawn. "Oh Spike, that is so terrific. "

"It’s only an audition, you realize. No promises."

"Of course... but a real audition! That is so great!"

Buffy looked less than thrilled. Suddenly William recalled that Buffy wasn’t any too enthusiastic about Dawn’s acting ambition. Shit... he’d probably put his foot in it again. But hell, Dawn was a big girl now... She didn’t need Buffy’s permission to be an actress. And when had *Buffy* ever listened to anybody about... anything? He looked Buffy right in the eye, as if challenging her to say something. She looked at him right back.

"Thank you, William," she said coolly, "that was very thoughtful of you. But now, I’m sure we’ve taken up enough of your time. The night may be young for you, but we have jet lag. Maybe we’ll see you again before we leave. "

William was crushed. He knew a dismissal when he heard one. He did have one more ace in his pocket.

"Well, if I could take up one more night of your time, while you’re here, on Thursday night I do have tickets for Hannibal."

"Hannibal? Oh My God! With Alan Cummings? How did you get them? That show’s been sold out forever!"

" There’s always a few loose tickets around, if you know who to ask."

"And apparently you do," said Buffy. "Well, I certainly wouldn’t want to deprive Dawn of the opportunity to see a musical about a serial killer. Not to mention the chance to be rejected *off Off*-Broadway. So once again, thank you, Spike." She stood up. "Come on Dawn. We have a full day tomorrow." Dawn shrugged at William.

"Thanks again, and we’ll see ya Thursday. Call our room about the time and everything. We’re in room 1254 by the way. Bye William!" She had to run to catch up with Buffy who was already at the elevator.

Spike remained at the table and ordered a bourbon on the rocks. Bloody hell! He was in it with both feet now. It was no accident that Buffy had called him Spike, like it was when Dawn did it. She was pissed at him good and proper. But why? What did he do this time? Glumly, William stared out into the city.

"Okay, big sister...just what is your problem?" Dawn demanded of Buffy when they got back to the room.

"Nothing. I’m just exhausted, okay? It’s been a long day. I miss Sunnydale. I miss Emily. I miss Giles! I’m about to lose my job! And I don’t need Spike coming along and sweeping you off your feet! He’s a vampire, Dawn, and don’t you forget it! He maybe be handsome and charming and able to get you auditions and show tickets, but he spent more than a century as a cold-blooded killer. I just don’t want you to forget that! Okay, Dawn?"

Dawn looked at Buffy. "Sure, Buffy. I won’t forget it. It is pretty easy to forget though, isn’t it?"

The sisters looked at each other in understanding.

"I think we’d better get some sleep," said Buffy.

"Buffy, I love you. You're all I bloody think about. Dream about. You're in my gut... my throat... I'm drowning in you, Summers, I'm drowning in you." Buffy tried to move away from that voice, but her wrists were shacked to the dungeon walls. She stared into the face of the vampire inches away from her own. "You and me, Slayer, we’re two of a kind. Two killers. Dance with me, Slayer, you know you want to."

Buffy sat up in the strange hotel room, her heart pounding. Damn it to hell! She hadn’t had that dream in years! Why now? Well, of course… Spike was back in her life again. Only this time it was worse! The old Spike was so easy to despise, with his ridiculous black duster and his silly hair and his punk attitude. He could pretend to be good all he liked, but Buffy could see right through him. Chip or no chip, he was still evil, with a capital E! But this Spike... how could she deal with a Spike who was kind and thoughtful? Who read ‘Green Eggs and Ham’ to Emily, and bought her frogs, and who would probably fall in love with Dawn? Damn him to hell! How dare he change! How dare he be... nice! How dare he be so nice to Dawn! Well, he’d always liked Dawn, the bastard. He was the one who had told her the facts of life... her life anyway. And Dawn had thought he was so cool, with his scary stories, and his funky crypt. Well, she just couldn’t let it happen. They would go to that damn musical with Spike, because Dawn was so set on it, but that was it. They would leave this horrible city and go back home where they belonged. And Dawn would move to New York City over Buffy’s dead body! If she wanted to be an actress so badly she could bloody well go to Hollywood! Full of resolution, Buffy turned over and went back to sleep.

Buffy walked into the hotel room and sat down wearily on the bed. Dawn was off sightseeing, with her guidebook and camera in hand. All she was missing was a large sign that said ‘Tourist’ hanging around her neck. Still, she should be safe enough in the daytime. She had promised Buffy to be back in the room before dark. Since it was almost June, and the days were long, that should give her plenty of time. Buffy had a sudden thought. Vampires must hate the summer with its long days and short nights. Funny, in all her years of dealing with vampires, that had never occurred to her before. Weird.

But none of this was solving her problem. She got up and opened the mini bar and took out a Diet Coke. Let the Council pay the exorbitant price. Maybe she’d order a couple of the pay per view movies too. Serve them right! Buffy sat down again. She had just met with Tina and Prunella. Okay, it was Priscilla; she only looked like a Prunella! Tina seemed like a nice enough kid, though. It was a difficult situation, no doubt about it. Buffy wished that she had someone to advise her. Like Giles. Xander and Willow were terrific friends but they were so pro-Buffy, that they couldn’t be objective. They would vote firmly for retaining the status quo. Giles would have been able to see the bigger picture at least, as much as he had loved her. Though perhaps, if he had lived, he wouldn’t have minded having her retire. They could have had more children and she could have lived that normal life she had always wanted. Wanted, that is, until confronted with the opportunity to actually have it… to lose the powers she had been given 11 years ago, powers that were as much a part of her now as breathing. Buffy stood up and began to pace the room. Could she make that sacrifice? Was it really necessary? What would she be if not the Slayer?

On impulse, Buffy sat down and dialed the number that had stayed in her memory since last night. But before the phone had a chance to ring, she slammed the receiver down again. She looked at her watch. Four o’clock. Would William even be up yet? It was still 4 more hours until the sun set. Funny. In Sunnydale Buffy had barged in on Spike any time of the day or night. She shook her head at the memory. Arrogant much? Well, this was important. She wouldn’t even be talking to him otherwise. She hadn’t forgotten her resolve from last night but William was in some ways a slayer, himself. He would at least be able to give her a different viewpoint. She dialed the number. After a few rings the answering machine picked up. Damn. He probably turned off the phone while he slept.

"Hello, William? This is Buffy. Could you please give me a call when you wake up? I need to talk to you. My room number is 1254. Thanks." She hung up.

Moments later the phone rang. William’s voice sounded sleepy but concerned. "Buffy, what’s wrong?"

"Uh, nothing’s wrong exactly. I just met with the Slayer wannabe and her Watcher today. I have to make an important decision and I’m driving myself crazy here. I was wondering if I could talk to you about it? "

"Sure, pet. But you’ll have to come here. It’s a bit early for me to be out and about. " He gave her the address, and she hung up and called the front desk for a cab. She left a note for Dawn. "I went over to talk to William about this whole retirement issue. If I’m not back by dinnertime, order something expensive from room service." She included William’s phone number, in case of emergencies and signed it, "Be Good, Buffy"

When the cab pulled up in front of William’s building, Buffy couldn’t believe her eyes. The place was a dump! This was his successful business? She looked the plaque with his logo... he shared the building with a Fortuneteller and what... a spy? Wonderful. Where was the massage parlor? This was so typical of Spike to boast about his success, and have it all be a bunch of hot air. He probably rented that damn suit he wore to Giles’ funeral. Or stole it. She pushed the doorbell. A loud buzz indicated the door was unlocked. She went inside the musty smelling vestibule. A sign on the elevator said "Out of Order" Someone had scrawled across it in magic marker, ‘So what else is new!"

She walked up two flights of stairs to a dingy hallway. She saw the door with Big Bad Investigations printed on the dirty glass. Oh, this was very impressive. She knocked. William opened the door. He was wearing jeans and a sweater, and his hair was still damp from the shower. "Come in. Welcome to Big Bad Investigations. No problem too big, too small or too gruesome! "

He smiled to himself as Buffy took in the office décor. A human skull had the place of honor on his dusty cluttered desk. A certain black duster hung from a rickety coat rack. The answering machine was the only piece of equipment that looked like it came from the 20^th century. Even the typewriter was manual, and was so dusty it looked as though it hadn’t been used in years. The one window had blinds that were missing a few slats. No light could get in though, because the glass was encrusted with dirt. The back wall was covered with dirty purple velvet drapes. A couple of gruesome Goya etchings on the wall completed the ambience.

"Charming." Buffy said.

"Sorry about the mess. It’s my charwoman’s century off."

Was William not even embarrassed about this place? Even his crypt had been a showplace compared to this! He laughed at her dismay.

"I know what you’re thinkin’, pet. It’s all image. Think about it. I’m the one they come to when all else fails. When the police laugh in their faces. When the regular detectives kick them out of their offices. This is the bottom of the barrel, pet and they expect it to look like this. Then I come in dressed in my basic black, and they know they’ve found the real deal. A real creature of the night who will tackle that demon, or stake those pesky vampires or deal with things too nasty and slimy for the upright citizens of the world to handle. I deal only in cash. I have no written records. I tell no tales out of school. They love it, pet. It’s made me rich. "

"I thought you said that you were legit."

"I said, pretty *near* legit. I don’t steal. I don’t murder humans... well, for obvious reasons. I stay just under the radar of the IRS and other government types. And I like to think I do some good. "

"But how can you live like this? Though I guess it is a step up from the crypt." She looked around. She didn’t see a bed or even a couch, just a couple of sagging chairs.

"Who says I live like this? " He pulled open the moldy drape on the back wall revealing a door. He opened it, and beckoned Buffy inside. She walked into William’s living room and stood there with her mouth open.

"Oh," was all she could manage. This was the apartment of the William in the Armani suit. It wasn’t large, but it was beautiful, with thick carpeting and leather sofas, and well-stocked bookshelves. She stared at the entertainment center. She and Giles had barely managed a VCR. This control panel looked like it could launch space shuttles. She started to giggle. This was just too much. Too much contrast for her poor mind to handle. "Sorry, William, it’s a great place. I just… " She froze.

William looked at Buffy. She was staring at the painting on his wall, one he had painted himself a few years ago. It was his best work, though Van Gogh probably didn’t have to worry. It depicted a blond girl in a black leather jacket sitting on the back porch of her home. She was crying. He thought that he had done a good job of capturing her despair and loneliness, though the perspective of the porch was a little off.

"Spi..William…is that me?" she asked in a choked voice.

Was she angry? He couldn’t tell. "Uh, yes… Buffy, it is."

"But… but how did you do that? You didn’t take a picture of me that night. You did this from memory? "

"I remember every detail of that night, Buffy. It was kind of a turning point for me. Seeing you sittin’ there on that porch, cryin’ like that. You know. You never even asked me why I had a rifle with me that night."

"A rifle… that’s right. I barely noticed."

"I was going to kill you. Buffy. Good and proper. To hell with the chip... I would have endured the pain."

Buffy was astounded. "Why?"

"Because you had hurt me. Throwing that money at me with such contempt, such loathing. I wanted to kill myself, but you first."

"But you didn’t. You came and sat down beside me. You... you were kind to me. I remember that."

"Because when I saw you cryin’ on the porch, you looked so… alone. So sad. And I felt somethin’ I hadn’t felt in 120 years… compassion."

"Compassion? I didn’t think that was possible."

"It was kind of a surprise to me too."

"And that was a turning point? How?"

"I realized then that I had a choice. I didn’t have to be evil, even though I didn’t have a soul ordering me about."

"Well, I didn’t notice any big change in your behavior after that."

"No, Buffy, you didn’t."

She frowned.

William continued. "I think people only see what they expect to see. And to be fair, I didn’t exactly turn into Mother Theresa."

Buffy thought of a dungeon and chains. "No, I can’t say that you did. But if I recall, you did seem to be trying to help. Getting in the way mostly. Kind of the way my daughter helps."

"So, tell me something. When Emily tries to help and makes a bollix of it, do you punish her?"

"No… of course not. How else will she learn? "

"I see."

"So, what are you trying to tell me, Spike? That we didn’t encourage you to be good? That you needed us to treat you like a four year old?"

"Well…yeah. I was a babe in the woods as far as trying to do the right thing was concerned. I know I screwed up more often than I succeeded. But I did try, Slayer. And maybe you would have noticed if that whole Drusilla mess hadn’t happened. I can’t tell you how often I’ve relived that night trying to figure out how it went so awfully wrong."

"Rule of thumb, Spike? Chains and cattle prods? Never a good idea."

"Yeah... I’ve learned a few lessons about dealing with human women over the years, none quite as painful as that one, though. "

Buffy shook her head, "Well, it’s all water under the bridge, Spike. William. I forgave you a long time ago. I hope you’ve forgiven me. "

"I could never stay mad at you, Buffy, even when I hated you. And you didn’t come here to rehash the past, anyway. You have a problem? "

"Kind of a major one."

"Would you like some tea? I do have a kitchen of sorts. And I can boil water like nobody’s business."

Buffy smiled. "That would be nice. Uh...do you by any chance have a bathroom?"

"Well, since this is the 21^st Century, most flats these days seem to come with ‘em. Mine is through the bedroom, there." He indicated a door to her left.

Buffy walked into William’s bedroom. She smiled at his bed, which wasn’t round and mirrored, but quite ordinary. The bathroom was tiny, but immaculate. She fixed her hair in the mirror over the sink, wondering, not for the first time, how vampires shave, or even if they shave. And how did Spike bleach his hair all those years if he couldn’t see it? As she left the bathroom, Buffy noticed that the closet door was ajar. She walked over quietly, and opened it. He only had two suits, but they were expensive. The same with his shoes. Only a couple of pairs, but good ones sharing the floor space with a pair of high, black, scuffed Doc Martin steel toed boots. A few shirts, one tie hanging on the back of the door. A brown leather jacket that reminded her of one Riley used to have. The rest of the closet was empty. No secret Buffy shrine. Not that she had really expected one, after all these years.

"See anything you like, pet?" Buffy jumped, caught snooping. "I thought maybe you drowned. Tea’s ready." Buffy opened her mouth to explain, but William just laughed.

"No need to apologize for snoopin’. Pet. I’ve done my share of that at your place, never fear."

Buffy and William sat down, she on the brown leather sofa, he in a matching easy chair.

"Well, I met with the new slayer to be and her watcher today. The fact is the Council of Watchers doesn't even know if she will be the next slayer called. There are slayers in training all over the world, and probably some, like I was, that nobody even knows about. So, it’s just an educated guess that she will be next because she’s the only identified slayer in New York and that’s where the latest hotspot is. I was called in California because that’s where the Hellmouth was."

"And they want you to step down so that this girl can become the next slayer?"

"Yes. The situation in the city is becoming desperate. You know what it’s like."

"I do. We certainly could use a Slayer. But don’t the Powers That Be usually take care of these things?"

"Unfortunately, the way The Powers *usually* take care of these things would involve me dying… So, this solution is preferable. Except that I don’t want to give up my powers!"

"Well, what about Faith?"

"Faith? " Faith had finally been released from prison the month before. She was in a halfway house now, and in a few months would go to work for Angel Investigations. "The Council would never take Faith back as a slayer. They don’t trust her."

"I mean, why don’t they retire her? Wouldn’t the new Slayer be called then?"

"That never occurred to me. I don’t think it’s occurred to the council either."

"Why don’t you ask them then, I’m sure they would be glad to oblige."

Buffy thoughtfully sipped her tea. After a long moment she said, "I can’t do it."

"Why the hell not? It would solve everybody’s problem, wouldn’t it?"

"Except Faith’s."

"Right. Your best friend, is she?"

"Look, William, Faith has done some pretty rotten things to me. You don’t know the half of it. But, she’s done her time. According to Angel, she is totally rehabilitated. He’s been visiting her regularly for years. Her life is going to be tough enough without losing her powers on top of it. Plus, she would have to agree... to give them up voluntarily. That’s how it works. And if I were her, I certainly wouldn’t want to do the Council that type of favor. What have they ever done for her? No… I think this is up to me." She sighed.

William was silent.

"What are you thinking?" said Buffy finally.

"I’m thinkin’ that it’s taken me six years, but I’ve finally learnt to keep my mouth shut."

"Why...what were you going to say? Tell me the truth."

"Listen cutie. One thing I’ve learnt about birds is that when they ask you to tell ‘em the truth, they don’t really want you to."

"Well, I’m not one of your girlfriends, William, so out with it!"

"We’ve actually been getting’ along this visit. Don’t want to spoil it."

"Well, consider it spoiled, as of now!" Buffy got up and grabbed her purse. "I’ve made up my mind. I’ll phone the Council tomorrow. Thanks for the advice!"

"Wait! If you already hate me again, I may as well tell you what I think."

"Well?" Buffy sat back down and looked at William. He stood up and started pacing restlessly while he spoke.

"Okay… Well… it’s always got to be about *you*, doesn’t it? I mean *you* have to be the one to make the big sacrifice, give up your powers for truth, justice, and the American way. Earn all kinds of Brownie points from the Council too. And for what? So you can be Buffy the martyr? Well, what about Faith? Maybe *she* wants to be the hero of the hour. Maybe the Council can offer her something she wants more than her powers. I don’t know. I don’t even know the chick. But shouldn’t she at least have the same choice you have? "

Buffy’s eyes had blazed with anger at the beginning of William’s speech, but by the end it had died out. She sat quietly for a moment.

"My God, William, I honestly thought that I was being unselfish. And noble. Why is it that you can see right through me?" She got up and went over to William and kissed him on the forehead. "Thank you, William. I mean it. I’ll call the Council tomorrow and suggest Faith. It may still come down to me, but maybe it won’t have to." She looked at her watch.

"Oh my, it’s late. I’ve got to phone Dawn and make sure she’s back in the room."

"Sure... there’s a phone in my room, so you don’t have to use that grungy office one. Listen, how would you like to come patrollin’ with me tonight? There’s a Fang bar that’s been killin’ off some of its customers. They claim it’s accidental-like, but I’m not so sure. Want to come check it out?"

Buffy’s eyes gleamed. She hadn’t done any slaying in ages. And fang bars were her personal pet peeve, since Riley had developed a fondness for them. "I’ll clear it with Dawn."

She went into the bedroom. She emerged a few minutes later. "Okay. Dawn is back. She received a script from your friend Holly for the audition tomorrow, so she will be occupied all evening. She’s going to order room service, so I’m free as a bird." She felt oddly free, too, as though a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

"I’ve got to change. Then I’ve got to eat. I’ll buy you a burger or something when we leave. Okay?"

When William emerged from his room a few minutes later, Buffy couldn’t believe her eyes. She had grown so used to William, that seeing Spike was a shock to her nervous system. Even his hair was slicked back removing all softness from his face, and emphasizing his sharp cheekbones, and eyebrow scar. As they passed through the office on the way out, William grabbed his trademark black duster. The transformation complete, Buffy and Spike went out into the night.

Chapter 7

Buffy and Dawn’s week in New York passed quickly. Dawn had her audition on Tuesday. She read her lines in a loud clear confident voice, and didn’t get so much as a callback. She hadn’t really expected one. But while waiting her turn to read, she had met a girl named Stephanie who was also trying to make it on Broadway. She told Dawn about a club where all the chorus kids hung out, and invited her to come along that night. Buffy realized that she couldn’t keep her 20-year-old sister locked in a hotel room all week, and grudgingly gave her permission, so Dawn’s social life in New York suddenly took a turn for the better.

Buffy had phoned the Council of Watchers with William’s idea about Faith. She asked them please not to pressure her, but to make her a reasonable offer. Buffy assured them that she would relinquish her powers if necessary. In the meanwhile she met with Tina every day, watching her train and offering advice. Her best advice would have been to ignore most of what Miss Scott was teaching her, forget the Japanese Aikido and use her instincts. Unfortunately, Tina did not yet have those instincts, Buffy realized, so she kept that opinion to herself, and mostly just looked on encouragingly.

In the evenings, Buffy went patrolling with William. They had always fought well together, only now they were fighting demons, not each other. New York was certainly a hotbed of activity, like Sunnydale had been in Buffy’s early years. She realized that she was having a terrific time, though she sorely missed Emily and spoke to her on the phone every day. William was astonishingly good company, and he amused Buffy with his sardonic comments about everything and his ready wit.

On Thursday night, William, Buffy and Dawn went and saw ‘Hannibal’. It was so hilariously over done, and Alan Cummings was such a stitch as Hannibal Lector, that they enjoyed it tremendously. Afterwards they went out to Sardis, because Dawn had wanted the full theater experience. Buffy and Dawn ate cheesecake while William had raspberry sorbet.

"Well, I say that any show that features a song about eating brains is my kind of musical!" William declared. Buffy and Dawn laughed.

"William, you are so weird," said Dawn. She raised her eyebrows. "Holly says so too. She warned me about you."

"She did, did she? When did you two have a heart to heart?"

"After my audition. She told me I wasn’t bad, just inexperienced. Then she warned me about getting involved with a vampire. She says that she learned the hard way. But," Dawn looked innocent, "she did say that you were great in bed."

"Dawn! "William and Buffy exclaimed simultaneously. Buffy turned beet red.

‘Hey, I’m only quoting."

‘My, look at the time! I think we’d better be going." Buffy would have loved to have grabbed Dawn by the hair and dragged her out of the restaurant, but instead she figured she had better salvage what dignity she still had left.

Before dawn on Friday morning, the phone rang in Buffy’s room. Quentin Travers had retired because of ill health a few years ago, but his replacement, Roland Lonsdale was no improvement. He also seemed to be unaware of the time difference between London and New York. In a haze of sleep, Buffy tried to comprehend what he was telling her. Basically, Faith had turned the council down cold. To paraphrase, she was going to work for Angel and she needed her powers, there was nothing the Council could possible offer her and they could go screw themselves. Good for her, Buffy thought. Buffy told Lonsdale that she would do what was required. She would be back in Sunnydale by Sunday. A Council representative would meet her there to perform the spell. It was way too early to process such bad news, so Buffy rolled over and went back to sleep.

The news didn’t seem much better when she awoke. Buffy didn’t say anything to Tina and her watcher that afternoon, since Lonsdale had asked her not to, but she watched Tina carefully. She was tall, much taller than Buffy and when she grew into her knees and elbows would probably be well built. The strength and agility would come with the calling, along with the heightened senses. IF she were called, that is. It would be pretty ironic, Buffy thought, if she relinquished her powers for the benefit of some unknown Slayer in Oklahoma or Pinsk. And what exactly was she going to do with the rest of her life? What was she trained for? She had a Bachelor’s Degree in Liberal Arts, which prepared her for exactly… nothing. She could work at the Magic Box, though Anya managed it so competently that all Buffy would be was just another sales clerk. Willow had found her niche in computers; Xander loved his construction work. What was out there for an-ex Slayer?

By the time Buffy met William that evening, she was in a foul mood. She told him what had happened with Faith and the Council.

"So by this time Monday, I’ll be Buffy the civilian," she said mournfully.

"Don’t do it," said William. "Tell ‘em to take a soddin’ leap, just like Faith did. You don’t owe those bloody gits anything! Come here to New York and be the Slayer, yourself."

"Don’t you think I’ve considered that? But I’m 26 years old and have a 4-year-old daughter. The council doesn’t *want* me as the Slayer here in New York. I’ve never toed the line or been under their control the way they would have liked. Giles and I spit in their faces too many times for them to want me anymore. They may call it voluntary retirement, William, but basically, I’ve been fired!"

William was outraged by the Council’s treatment of Buffy. He knew how important her powers were to her. He had once been an ordinary man, and he never would have traded one moment of his vampire unlife, for a lifetime of mediocrity. But there was nothing he could do to help Buffy. This was between her and the Council.

"Tell you what, pet. I’ve got a big case lined up. Gak demons, a whole nest of them. At least you’ll have a last night of glory, eh? And then if you’re real good, I’ll take you to a place I know."

"What kind of place?" Buffy asked suspiciously.

"That would be tellin’. Come on Slayer, let’s get a move on and kill us some demons."

She smiled sadly. He wouldn’t be able to call her Slayer much longer. She put on her black leather jacket, and they went out.

A few hours later, they were exhausted but exhilarated. The Gak demons had proven to be surprisingly tough and it had taken a major effort to defeat them. But Buffy and William worked together flawlessly, covering each other’s backs, and always there with a weapon when needed. So well did they work together, that the demons were dispatched before midnight. Dawn was out clubbing with her new theater friends. Buffy had met them and they seemed nice enough so after reminding Dawn a dozen times that the legal drinking age in New York was 21 - which she was NOT - she had let her go with a fairly light heart.

The place that William took Buffy to turned out to be a funky little club in the West Village. There was a live band, and the place reminded her strongly of the Bronze, before the Troll renovations. Buffy looked at the band half expecting to see Dingoes Ate My Baby. As they sat down at a small table and ordered drinks, Buffy wondered if William liked this place *because* it was like the Bronze or in spite of that fact.

"I’m getting déjà vu all over again," said Buffy looking around.

"This place reminds you of the Bronze, right? Me too." He hesitated. "Uh…actually, I brought you here for a reason. Pet. Soon you’ll be leavin’ and I probably won’t get to see you again... and there is somethin’ that I have always wanted to do. Dance with me, Buffy?"

‘You know you want to dance, Slayer.’ Those words had haunted her dreams for years. For Spike, the word meant fighting and making love; for him the two were almost interchangeable. She had always sensed that and when they had fought each other so bitterly all those years there had been an underlying sexual tension that had scared Buffy to death, as much as she had sought it. But this was William. Six years had changed him so much, perhaps he just meant… dance. Did she dare? In a couple of days she was going back to an ordinary life. She put down her drink. "Why the hell not!" she said, more to her herself than to William.

They stood up. The band obligingly started playing a slow song. William took her hand and led her to the dance floor. At first they held each other awkwardly like teenagers in a school gymnasium. Buffy hadn’t danced in years, not since her wedding, in fact, and William was an unfamiliar male body in her arms. Unfamiliar, but yet familiar... for some reason it seemed as though they had done this before, somewhere, somehow. In the hot stifling club, William’s hands felt cool on her back. Buffy had danced once with Angel at her prom, and she remembered the feeling, but that wasn’t what was haunting her. Gradually as they moved together, her arms moved up around his neck and his around her waist, and soon they were barely moving at all, just shuffling their feet, their arms around each other as though they had been dancing together for years. As she put her head on his shoulder, Buffy felt William’s lips brush her hair. And then her neck. She turned her head so that he found her warm lips with his cool ones, and suddenly they were kissing there on the dance floor and not really dancing at all.

When William brought Buffy back to her hotel room, Dawn was already back, but it was just as well that she couldn’t invite him in. It would be a big mistake, Buffy knew. They lived 3,000 miles apart but the distance between them was more than miles. Still she couldn’t resist kissing him outside her door for quite a long time even after Dawn called out, "Goodnight William!"

The next morning, Saturday, Buffy awoke early and with a feeling of doom. She had dreamed about Faith, but the dream was indistinct, and Buffy struggled to remember the details in vain. Dawn also woke up in a gloomy mood. Today was their last day in New York and neither of them was looking forward to leaving. Dawn, because she had fallen in love with New York, and Buffy because... well Sunnydale would seem awfully tame after this, for more reasons than one.

Their plan for this last day was a good one. Buffy was meeting early with Tina for one last sparring session, and then she and Dawn were going to do some serious shopping. She couldn’t go home to Sunnydale empty-handed. As for tonight, William had some major slayage planned, but Buffy decided that perhaps she wouldn’t go. Last night had been a little too much fun. She remembered how angry she had been at William the first night they had arrived, worried that he and Dawn would get involved. That fear had proven groundless. William thought of Dawn with affection, and Dawn apparently regarded William as her ticket to Broadway, but there was nothing else evident between them. If only she could say the same for herself. Strangely enough, until last night William hadn’t shown her the slightest sign that he still thought of her romantically after all these years. He had been amicable but casual, treating her like an old family friend. Buffy sat up, as it suddenly hit her. Damn him! Spike had finally gotten smart! And she had fallen for him, hook, line and sinker. Well, that didn’t change anything. She was not getting involved with any vampires at this stage of her life, especially now that she was about to become a civilian. She had a new future to plan, even if she wasn’t looking forward to it.

She met Tina at around 10:00. She changed into sweats, because they were going to do some sparring. There was only so much that could be learned with training dummies. They faced off, and began. Tina had the technical moves down pat, but she tended to telegraph her punches, and kicks, and Buffy evaded them easily. She also couldn’t match Buffy’s speed or agility. Tina aimed a roundhouse kick at Buffy’s mid section, and stopped cold. She turned deathly pale, and started to shake. Buffy helped her to the bench and Miss Scott hastened over to see if she was okay. After a few minutes, Tina assured them both that she was fine, and wanted to continue. She and Buffy faced off once more, and this time Tina executed a perfect kick that hit Buffy in the shoulder, knocking her down. Buffy was stunned... that had been really good. Buffy got up and lunged at Tina, but Tina was suddenly a different fighter, matching Buffy punch for punch, kick for kick. Buffy had the advantage of 11 years of experience; Tina, the advantage of youth. But it was soon obvious to Buffy and to Priscilla Scott who was watching open mouthed there were now two slayers in the room. Buffy halted the workout. She and Miss Scott examined Tina, who said that apart from that moment of faintness, she had never felt better. Buffy felt a shiver of apprehension. How had Tina become a Slayer? This was *so* not good. Buffy excused herself and went inside to phone the only person she could think of who might have some answers.

"Angel investigations," answered Cordelia in a grumpy early morning voice. Buffy realized that it was barely 8:00 AM in LA.

"Cordy, this is Buffy! "

"Buffy! Well, this is a pleasant surprise. What’s up?"

"Listen, I have no time to chitchat right now. Have you heard from Faith lately?"

"Faith ? No. The last I heard she was in the halfway house and doing great. Angel is all gung ho on having her work for us, you know. I personally have my doubts, but…"

"Look, Cordy, can you track her down for me, and have her call me? It’s important." She gave Cordelia the phone number of the hotel and left Tina and Miss Scott, who were phoning the Watcher’s Council in London.

William woke up with a start and looked at his watch. 10:30. AM? He had just fallen asleep a little while ago. With consciousness came remembrance. Buffy was leaving tomorrow. He thought about the night before and how many years he had waited for that one moment. Holding her in his arms, kissing her. And now she would be gone forever. He had a sinking suspicion that Buffy might want to get out of seeing him tonight. She had fought her attraction to him tooth and nail for as long as he had known her. Actually, he had once put up rather a good fight himself. His thoughts turned back to last night. William had felt many strong emotions in the 127 years since he had become a vampire. He had felt anger and hatred, exhilaration and a kind of manic glee, passion and lust, and in the last few years a kind of contentment, as he gradually came to terms with himself, but until last night he had never been simply happy.

He gradually drifted back to sleep. A loud buzzing startled him awake two hours later. Somebody was downstairs. William pushed the button, and heard Buffy’s voice asking to come up, but she didn’t sound like herself. A cold thrill of fear went through William. Something was wrong. His feeling was confirmed when he saw Buffy’s white face and her trembling hands.

He drew he into his private apartment.

"What is it, love... Emily? Dawn?"

"N-no. There was a man... hanging around the half way house. He was a pimp who had b-been bothering some of the women. He attacked one of them... I-I guess she had been one of his prostitutes. F-faith defended her... she beat the guy up... hurt him pretty bad, I guess. He –he couldn’t take getting his ass kicked by a woman, the bastard. She *could* have killed him... but she didn’t. She *didn’t*. So he came back last night... with a gun, and, and shot her. Five times. She... died at 7:30 this morning. I –I was working with Tina this morning, when she suddenly became the… Slayer... Oh William!" With that Buffy burst into tears.

William gathered her in his arms and held her while she wept. His heart ached for Buffy, because he could never stand to see her cry. But his mind was racing to process this information. Faith was dead. This new kid was the Slayer. Buffy’s powers were safe. Where was the bad here? Why was Buffy crying? Wasn’t Faith her enemy? William realized that this was an important moment. If he, a soulless being, could understand this... why Buffy cried at the death of her enemy... then perhaps he could truly connect with her and her human world.

"Buffy, darling, tell me. Doesn’t this mean that you can keep on being a Slayer? Why are you so upset?"

"Y-yes, William." She looked at him, as if suddenly understanding his question. "But don’t you see... I didn’t want it this way. Poor Faith. She never had a chance in this world. She didn’t have a family or friends like I did. She chose evil, because she never had anyone to encourage her to be good, or who loved her in spite of the way she sometimes acted. Except for the Mayor, and he only used her for his own purposes. Her death right now is so unfair. She had paid for her crimes; she had a chance to go work for Angel and find a group of friends like I had and do some good in the world. But she chose not to kill that man, and because of that, The Powers That Be got their New York Slayer, and all of the Council’s meddling was totally useless." She spat the last part out bitterly.

"No point in beatin’ yourself up about it, Buffy. It isn’t your fault, love. You didn’t kill her. "

"I know, but I still feel guilty. Maybe secretly I *wanted* something to happen to save my powers. Maybe The Powers That Be favored me for some reason."

"Maybe it had nothing to do with you, honey. Maybe it was just fate. Maybe it would never have worked out with Angel. Maybe the Powers That Be actually knew what they’re doing. We don’t know anything, love. All we can do is guess." Humans. Having souls made their lives so… complicated.

"Well, Angel said that the women in the halfway house consider Faith a hero. This man had been terrorizing them, forcing them back into crime. Now he is in prison, and will be for a long time. At least she died helping someone. Maybe that will count for something. But I’m sorry William... I still can’t rejoice over getting what I want at the expense of a person’s life. Do you understand that? *Can* you understand that?"

"I think so, Buffy. I guess it means puttin’ yourself in the other person’s place. Thinkin’ that maybe if things were different, you might have ended up like Faith. Sorry, love… this stuff is bloody difficult for me."

"William, you have no idea how far you’ve come. Back in Sunnydale you never would have even asked the question. "

"And if I had asked the question back then, would you have answered me?"

She considered. "Maybe we’ve both come a long way. "

"Come, love... Let me make you some of my famous tea."

They sat and talked for a while, trying to make some sense of what had happened to Faith. Buffy decided that she would go to Faith’s funeral in LA, when she got back. It was the least she could do. "Poor Faith," Buffy said, shaking her head sadly. "I hope that she has at last found some peace."

"Buffy…" He took her hand and looked at it. Her gold wedding band shone on her finger below a small diamond ring. Maybe this was a mistake, but he forged ahead. "What are you going to do when you get home?"

"I hadn’t really thought about it. This changes everything, doesn’t it?"

"Does it, Buffy? What are you really going to do in Sunnydale, even with your powers intact? The Hellmouth is closed. Not much to do for a Slayer. "

"But Sunnydale is my home. My family and friends are there."

"Your friends have their own lives now. What are *you* going to do with yours? Join the WWF? Try out for ‘Survivor 9’?"

"What are you saying, William?"

"Come back to New York, Buffy. I’ve been looking for an assistant." At Buffy’s look, he hastened to add: "But a partner would be even better. There’s work to do here. And Dawn loves it here. Admit it. NYU has a great theater department."

"But I have a house in Sunnydale!"

"Sell it. Now that the Hellmouth’s closed, property values will be going up."

"What about Emily? She couldn’t live in a neighborhood like this."

"We’d find you a *nice* place to live... .I know some people in real estate. And there are good private Nursery schools too. "

"But New York is on a Hellmouth!"

"Between you, me and the new Slayer kid, we’ll soon whip this place into shape. We’ll make it safe as houses."

"But it gets cold here in the winter; it even snows!"

"Sweetheart, we’ll buy you a coat. And mittens. And ear muffs."

"I hate your office."

"We’ll redecorate. And get a secretary."

‘You’re making it very difficult to turn you down."

"That was the plan, honey."

William leaned in close to Buffy, and looked in her eyes. "Listen Buffy. Nothing has changed. I’m still in love with you. I’ve just developed a bit of self-control is all. But if you don’t want that to be a part of the deal, it doesn’t have to be. "

She looked in his blue eyes. "William... that I don’t understand. You have seen me once in 6 years. How can you still love me after all that time?"

"Buffy, I’m a vampire. We tend to look at life on a different scale. Remember, I was in love with Dru for 120 years, and would probably be in love with her still, if she hadn’t… Well, let’s just say that six years, to me, is just a drop in the bucket. I haven’t even *begun* to love you properly, Buffy."

He stood up and pulled her to her feet and they kissed, tenderly at first, then with increasing passion. After a long while, Buffy said, "I’ll come back, William. At least for a while, check things out and... see what happens. I can’t make any promises until I do a little research."

"Research… you mean about houses and schools and such like?"

"Well, that too." She smiled coyly, "But first I have to find out if what Holly said about you was true. I can’t move 3,000 miles for anything less." She ran her fingers through his soft curly hair. "It’s a good thing I’m not leaving until tomorrow morning."

William smiled. "That’s barely enough time, if we want to do a thorough job of it. We’d better get a move on, Slayer." He swept her up in his arms. She was so light, his precious Buffy. His heart full of joy, he carried her into the bedroom.

The End