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05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!


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Chapter 1:

A large crash could be heard from the living room. Eyes wide, Buffy ran out of the kitchen, knife in hand hoping that she'd be able to find the demon responsible. Unfortunately there was no sign of the guilty party, just the shattered remains of a vase on the floor.

"Oh, Buffy, not Grandma's vase," Joyce said as she came down the stairs.

"Sorry mom, I'll get him next time I swear," Buffy promised. Of course she'd made that promise several times already over the last couple days, but the small demons continued to elude her.

Who knew that the Thort demon would be much easier to kill when it was a seven-foot tall, horned monstrosity? But then no one had warned her that it actually spawned through its blood. Buffy hadn't cleaned the sword she'd used to kill the Thort until she'd gotten home. The rag she'd used had gone down into the basement with the rest of the laundry, and a few days latter her home was infested with larval Thort demons.

They were small things about the size of her fist, but they moved quickly. They looked like shiny grey hairless rodents and Dawn had named them "sludge bunnies" which had terrified Anya until she'd seen one and declared that it was no where near as terrifying as an actual rabbit.

The important thing was that the sludge bunnies were in the walls of 1620 Revello drive, and they were fast. Buffy couldn't' seem to find a way to catch and kill the things.

"It's all right, Buffy," Joyce said wearily as she knelt down to pick up the pieces of the vase that had been knocked over.

It was that weariness that bothered Buffy more than anything else, that made her determined to get rid of the sludge bunnies no matter what. Her mom had been through so much this year, she was just getting better from her surgery and then there was all the worry over Dawn and the crazy hell god who was after her. Her mother didn't need demon rats to worry about too.

And then as if to make her day complete, the front door opened and her immortal pain in the ass waltzed into her house as if he lived there. Spike was carrying some sort of wooden box except that one side had a wire mesh over it like a cage.

"Spike would it kill you to knock? And what the hell is that?" Buffy demanded as he shut the door behind him and made his way into the living room.

"Heard about the Thort problem," he said. "Came to help. Howdy, Joyce."

"Hello Spike," Joyce said, although she was looking a bit warily at the cage that he set down on her coffee table.

Spike opened the door of the cage and reached his hand inside. Buffy half expected him to pull a bloody stump out. Instead a cute and furry face appeared from the dark opening as a small animal scurried up Spike's arm.

"What is that?" Buffy asked at the same moment Joyce asked, "Is that a weasel?"

"Ferret actually. Her name is Muffin and she's going to take care of your Thort problem."

"You have a pet named Muffin?" Buffy asked while snickering.

"No," Spike replied. "You do. As for the name, she came with it. Didn't just run down to the pet store and grab up the first ferret I saw. This is a trained Thort hunting ferret."

By this time Muffin had traveled up Spike's arm and had put her paws on the side of his face as she sniffed his hair. He reached up to grab her about the middle and held her out to Buffy, her head and paws poking up above his fingers.

"Uh, huh, she looks like a real vicious killer," Buffy said skeptically. "Look, why don't you take Muffin the Demon Slayer back to your crypt."

Just then Muffin began to struggle in Spike's hand, kicking her back legs and wiggling her head.

"What's wrong with it?" Buffy asked as Spike released Muffin onto the ground.

Muffin bounded out of his hand and dashed straight for the couch, flattening herself until she could fit under it.

"Is she going to shed in the furniture?" Joyce asked concerned.

Just then Dawn came down stairs. "What's going on? Hey Spike."

"Just here to take care of your demon infestation," Spike told the youngest Summers.

"More like add to the infestation," Buffy said. "What are you waiting for? Lift up the couch and get it."

"Eww. What's in the couch?" Dawn asked.

"Spike's weasel," Buffy told her sister.

"Ferret," Spike corrected. "And she's not mine, she's your sister's."

"Whatever," Buffy replied. "Well? What are you waiting for? Get it out of the couch."

"I'm telling you Summers, just give Muffin a chance."

"Spike," Joyce said trying to calm things a bit between her oldest daughter and the vampire. "I'm really not sure thet we want small furry animals in the sofa."

"I don't know mom," Dawn interjected. "Do ferrets eat popcorn? Cause you know it might be like a little vacuum cleaner. Maybe we should get one for Xander?"

Before anyone could say anything else a strange high-pitched whistling noise came out of the couch before being abruptly cut off. They all stared at the couch for several moments before a tail wiggled out from under it. Muffin reappeared dragging the body of a dead sludge bunny behind it.

"See, told ya," Spike said as he reached into his pocket to pull out a small plastic bag. He took a small pellet out of the bag and gave it to Muffin. "You have to give her a treat each time," he explained.

Muffin took the treat and held it between her two front paws as she ate it.

"Oh, she's so cute," Dawn said as she sat down on the floor in front of Muffin so that she could watch the small animal delicately eat.

Seeing Dawn, Muffin scooted back, clutching her small treasure to her.

"It's okay little guy," Dawn said. "I'm not going to take your treat."

Spike on the other hand was looking smugly at Buffy waiting for her to admit that the ferret had done exactly what he'd said it would do. Buffy just decided to ignore Spike and watch her sister and the critter.

Once Muffin had finished eating she moved towards Dawn, hesitant at first before dashing up to the youngest Summers and then darting back. But the action was not timid or fearful but playful. Muffin made several more such approaches, as if daring Dawn to try and catch her. Giggling, Dawn reached out to pick up the ferret.

Suddenly Dawn yelped, "Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!" and everyone was rushing to her aid.

Muffin had bitten her hand and wasn't letting go. It was finally Spike who disentangled the teenage girl and the ferret by grabbing the fur around Muffin's neck.

"Oh, my god!" Buffy exclaimed as she looked at Dawns bleeding hand. "Your pet tried to eat my sister."

Joyce quickly pulled Dawn out of the room to clean and bandage the bite marks. Under normal circumstances Buffy might have called her sister a wimp, but considering these were Spike induced injuries she was willing to let her sister play it for all the attention it was worth.

"Look it's not what you think," Spike explained. "Biting's just how they play and show affection. Means she likes your sister."

"You would have a pet that bites," Buffy countered.

"Look she's not meant to be a pet. I'm telling you. . ." Spike stopped. Holding the ferret by the scruff of the neck made it hard to have a serious conversation with Buffy. He put Muffin down on the couch. "I'm telling you that if you want to get rid of those Thort demons, this is the only way."

"I can handle the Thorts myself. I am the Slayer remember?"

"Funny, from what I hear you've been infested for about a week now. Just haven't gotten around to it I suppose?"

"I'll have you kno- What the hell is she doing now?"

Spike turned to follow Buffy's line of sight. Muffin's back was arched and her tail stuck straight up in the air. She was jumping from left to right as her head shook from side to side. Buffy took a few steps back from the mad display.

"It's gone crazy. Make it stop!" she ordered Spike.

"Don't be such a big baby. She's not crazy, she's just happy and excited. She's dancing."

"Oh please."

"Look Slayer, it's simple. Do you want the Thorts gone or not?"

"Yes," Buffy answered reluctantly.

"Fine, then take the damn ferret."

Buffy eyed Muffin for a minute. She hated the idea of taking anything from Spike, especially help. And then she had an idea about how she could both take the ferret, and annoy Spike.

"Okay, but I'm not calling her Muffin. Let's see, she's a crazy girl that bites. I know. I'll call her Dru."

"What?" Spike roared. "You are not calling her Dru."

"I'll call her whatever I want." Buffy addressed the ferret which had stopped its dancing when it was no longer the center of attention. "Do you like the name Drusilla?"

The Drusilla the ferret began to dance again.

"See," Buffy said. "She likes it."

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