Buffy woke up, her head spinning and her body aching. Taking a deep breath, she got a mouthful of dust and started coughing. Opening her eyes, she realized she was naked...and that she was in Spike's arms! She quickly stood up, pushing Spike away as he sleepily reached for her again,"Don't go, luv"
She just looked at him, disgusted, before quickly getting into her clothes and half-running out of the crypt.
She was shaking as she left. What had just happened? Had she really thrown herself at Spike that way? She leaned against one of the gravestones for a moment, as everything from last night swept over her. She bit her lip, then hurried on home.
Quietly opening her front door, she found Dawn and Willow were waiting for her, looking very concerned. There went her plan of sneaking upstairs.
"Where have you been, Buffy?" demanded Dawn.
"It's none of your business, Dawn!" Buffy snapped.
Dawn flinched slightly and looked down, "It's just...we were worried about you. We didn't know..."
Buffy looked ashamed. She hadn't thought very much about that last night. And right now, all she wanted to do was to get the hell out of there and crawl into her nice, comfy bed. "I'm sorry...there was a demon and I had to...hide."
"Why did you have to hide?" frowned Willow, confused.
"I...I...Spike, he...he got hurt, and I had to help him. Look, I'm exhausted, and I really want to go to bed, if that all right with you."
"Um, yeah, sure..." Dawn's voice trailed off as she realized Buffy wasn't waiting for an answer as she dashed upstairs.
Yanking on some pajamas, Buffy crawled into bed, but she couldn't sleep. The events of last night kept replaying in her mind.
"You came back wrong!" Spike kissing her, roughly. She reaches for him, wanting him. She can here a zipper and shivers in anticipation. The walls fall down around them, but she doesn't care. She settles herself on top of him, feeling him inside her. Moaning deeply she looks into his deep blue eyes and looses herself in them...
Buffy sat up, leaning against the headboard of her childish bed, her head between her hands. Suddenly she started crying. She wasn't even sure why; she just felt that she'd done something that would incredibly disappoint everyone. What did she do? She didn't love Spike. With him, it was just passion...sex. She had sex with Angel, a vampire, before. Anya had been a demon for over a thousand years. Willow and Tara's relationship wasn't exactly conventional. She wasn't worse than all of them...so why couldn't she stop crying?
She looked out her window. It was already night; she must have slept for hours! She sneaked downstairs and quietly left, not disturbing anyone. She wandered the cemeteries, feeling that everything was suddenly different for the Scoobies.
She felt a vampire come up behind her, and she spun around, only to face Spike. He was standing there smirking, his long, black trench coat swirling around him, a cigarette dangling from one of his hands.
Buffy turned away and walked quickly away, but he was faster, "Wait up, Luv, you can't hide from me."
She turned back to face him, "What do you want, Spike?"
What did he want? He wanted to touch her warm body, feel her hot breath...he dropped the cigarette on the ground, "Bloody respect is what I want! I am not your slave, Buffy. What's wrong with you?"
She looked at him coldly. "I don't know, Spike, why don't you tell me? After all, you're the one who told me I came back wrong!"
"You got that right! After making love to me, you just..." It wasn't making love and he knew it. It was pure fucking, the best he'd had, but that was all it was.
"Shut up, Spike."
Spike snarled slightly and punched her in the face. Startled, she staggered back for a second, before narrowing her eyes and punching him back. Fist and feet flew, the skirmish becoming like a violent dance. Spike pinned her to the wall and kissed her passionately, his tongue now battling hers, trying to dominate. Moaning, she began to lose herself in the feeling, before she realized what was happening. She pushed him away, and punched him, hard.
"What the hell were you doing, Spike?" she backed away, stunned, although she was already starting to feel aroused again.
Spike growled slightly, enraged, "What's wrong with you, you bloody Slayer? You think you can do whatever you want with me, but I can't do anything to you?"
Buffy looked away for a second, knowing he was right. Suddenly, he grabbed her hand, pulling her a little closer.
"Let go, Spike!" she shouted, struggling to free her hand.
" No!" Spike shouted back at her, "You will listen to me, damn it! You can't treat people like that, Buffy"
She finally managed to free herself, "People, Spike. You aren't a person. You are just a thing, and I am..."
"I'm being serious." Spike took a deep, unnecessary breath, "Look, I love you. What are you afraid of? We made love, and I don't care what you want to call it now, but we did make love, pet. Where is the Buffy I knew, the fire in your eyes?"
As she looked at him, all she wanted to do was jump him and rip his clothes off...no, bad Buffy! Him vampire, me Slayer! Knowing that she'd give in soon anyway if she stayed this close to him, she pushed him away. Staring straight into his eyes, she answered his question, the question she'd asked herself so many times, "She died."
She held his gaze for one more second, before running off toward the Magic Box.
As she entered the store, everyone was arguing about a demon Willow had seen. Buffy quietly sat down on one of the chairs, moodily thinking.
"Hey, Buff!" grinned Xander "Patrolling?"
Buffy nodded absently, still thinking about her confrontation with Spike.
"I still think it's a bunny demon!" Anya sniffed.
Willow rubbed her eyes tiredly, "What are you talking about? I know what I saw."
"Did he have a carrot?"
"What? NO!" Willow began pacing back and forth, wondering how they would ever manage without Giles. "I..."
Whatever else she was going to say was interrupted by Spike, in full game face, bursting into the store. His yellow eyes were slits, anger radiating from him. He threw a chair out of his way, and Dawn ducked behind one of the shelves, scared. She hadn't ever seen him like this.
"What are you doing here, Spike?" sneered Xander. "Spikey couldn't find a date tonight?"
Spike ignored him and headed straight for Buffy, who quickly moved away. He grabbed her, pulling her back! . "C'mon, pet, believe me. I love you!"
Xander snickered, and Spike turned to glare at him, before looking back at Buffy. He held her close for a second more, then, as she turned her head away, he let her go.
"Tell them, Buffy! I know what we did last night was love, so tell them!"
"Shut up, you idiot!" She yelled, horrified of the whole gang finding out what had happened, "Leave me alone!"
"We made love, Buffy! It wasn't just sex!"
The room was suddenly quiet; everyone froze. Dawn slowly walked out from where she had been hiding, and managed to choke out one word, "What?"
Buffy bit her lip, tears springing into her eyes, "Look what you've done!"
They all just stared at her, except Xander, who couldn't accept even the idea, "In your dreams, Spike! Buffy would never have sex with you!"
"Really? Well, Buffy and I had sex last night! Go on. Ask her. She'll tell you."
Tears were now running down her cheeks, "Shut up, Spike," she snarled, "or I'll stake you, and I won't miss your heart!"
"Buffy," Xander looked like he was about to faint, "He's lying...right?"
She didn't answer. Anya seemed bored with the whole discussion, while Dawn and Xander looked shocked, angry, and disappointed. Willow, however, looked concerned. Putting on her resolve face, she took a deep breath, "Buffy...you didn't..."
Buffy just looked at her for a split second, before running out of the shop as fast as she could.
squawks
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!