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Authors Chapter Notes:
When Buffy left after killing Angel, she ended up in Sydney, Australia. Everything else about her backstory will be revealed using a similar method of flashbacks seen in the show.

I really hope people enjoy this fic because I've written the first few 'episodes' already, and I'm finding it really fun and exciting to write.

The story will be updated every Sunday.

Obviously the characters of LOST are all property of JJAbrams [who is as much a genius as Joss Whedon] and I'm hugely envious of his incredibly complex mind. I just hope I do his characters justice!

Please review :]


LOST

without you


Episode One: The Pilot [part one]

……………………….

All of us have a secret

One of us is a hero

One of us is a fraud

One of us in a junkie

One of us is a cop

One of us is a champion

One of us is a monster

One of us is a saint

One of us is a sinner

One of us is a Martyr

One of us is a murderer

All of us are guilty

All of us are LOST


……………………..

She felt sand beneath her fingertips; sand in her hair; sand coating the back of her throat. It made her cough.


She heard rustling movements and her eyes snapped open to the scene unfolding around her. People were screaming out in pain and terror; running from something. Someone dove for cover, landing mere inches away from her as something else, something huge and metal, crashed down from the sky in a cascade of fire and sand.


Someone was screaming for help, over and over, while someone else was shouting orders and trying to move people away from the burning-


The burning aircraft.


Scenes flooded back to Buffy in a jolt, and she leapt to her feet, suddenly wondering where Spike could be. Then chastising herself for even caring a little bit. Son of a bitch said he was going to kill her anyway; besides, the sun was out and blaring brightly, suggesting that the eternal pain in her ass was now little more than a pile of ash somewhere; mingling with the golden sand of the beach they’d crash-landed on.


“Are you hurt?” asked a heavily accented voice, and Buffy shook her head, allowing herself to be helped to her feet by a decided-looking foreign man with a thick head of black curls. “Can you walk?”


“I’m fine.” Buffy said, taking a few tentative steps, then leaping back in horror as she witnessed someone being sucked into a broken propeller of the plane; their body destroyed by the swift turn of the blades.


“Stay here.” the man said, proceeding on to help other people; on the surface, appearing unaffected by the quick death of one of the survivors, but his haunted eyes telling a different story.


Buffy stood awkwardly; feeling scared, lost and out of her depth. But then the sounds of someone crying out had her spinning around in an instant.


“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Buffy cried, running over to the blond woman who was sobbing; arms wrapped around her body. Buffy kneeled beside her, “Are you hurt?”


The woman shook her head; desperately trying to suppress the desire to scream as she covered her face with her hands.


“Hey,” Buffy said, trying to calm her as she continued to tremble and whimper. “I’m... I’m Buffy. What’s...” she felt a little bit ridiculous, “What’s your name?”


The blond looked up at her through her fingers, which dropped away from her sooty face as her sobs lessened.


Her eyes averted and she sniffed a little as she said. “Shannon. My name’s Shannon.”


“Are you okay Shannon?” Buffy asked, scanning her over for any apparent wounds.


The woman shook her head, as petrified tears slipped down her cheeks. “I’m... I’ve never been so scared in all my life.” she confessed in a whisper. “I...”


Shannon!” cried a voice, and Buffy’s head whipped around in time to see a young man running towards them. He collapsed on his knees beside her.


“Is she okay?” he asked, directing his question at Buffy, who nodded adamantly.


“She’s-”


“I’m fine.” Shannon interrupted, suddenly looking a lot better; like she wanted to prove herself strong in front of this man. “Honestly Boone; way to... Way to overreact.”


He smiled, looking relieved as he helped her to her feet. “You know me.” he muttered, and he pulled her arm across his shoulders, “Come on; we have to move away from the aircraft.”


Shannon glanced back at the younger girl; grateful smile on her face, “You coming Buffy?” she asked.


But the Slayer faltered, glancing around at the mayhem surrounding her, and quickly shook her head as she noticed someone trapped beneath one of the plane’s wings.


She had a calling after all.

……………………………………………………………………


“I’m Sayid.” The dark guy who had spoken to her earlier said as Buffy carried the last of the loose luggage away from the wreckage and set it down with the pile. “You were very helpful here today.”


Buffy gave him a sceptical look as she said, “Thanks.” He seemed pretty genuine though. “I’m Buffy.”


He chuckled as if he thought she might be kidding, but then stifled it as she merely stared at him.


“How old are you Buffy?” he asked instead.


“Seventeen.” She replied. “Though it’s rather impolite to ask a lady her age.”


Sayid chuckled again, before saying, “It’s just that I noticed you seem to be alone here.” He smiled kindly before asking, “Were your parents on the plane?”


Buffy looked down, shaking her head, “Uhh, no.” she admitted. “I was travelling alone… Well, I bumped into an old enemy on the plane, but other than that.” She smiled a little too brightly. “How about you?”


“Oh- alone.” He confirmed.


The arguments of a Korean couple caught the pair’s attention for a moment, and everyone on the beach seemed to glance to where the two foreigners were snapping at each other. The woman, who had shoulder length black hair and beautiful almond shaped eyes seemed to be trying her hand at independence, while her husband was adamantly attempting to redo the top buttons of her mauve cardigan.


As the argument seemed to cool, Buffy’s eyes began to wander over her fellow survivors.


Boone and Shannon, the only other people she currently knew, were sitting together; barely speaking, while a slightly older looking black man was trying to calm down his ten year old son.


“Vincent!” the small boy was yelling, “Come on boy, Vincent!”


“Ssh, Walt.” His father said, trying to get the boy to sit down. “People are trying to adjust.”


“I want my dog!” the boy, Walt, exclaimed, seeming outraged by his father’s request for quiet, “You can’t tell me what to do.”


The father looked exasperated.


Beside them sat a much older looking man; already eating an orange that he’d collected from the jungle. His eyes met Buffy’s for the slightest moment, and she was quick to look away when he raised his knife to slice his orange in half.


“How many of us do you think there are?” Buffy asked, glancing back at Sayid again. “About fifty?”


Sayid did a quick head count, and said. “Forty eight of us. That’s all.”


“Jeez.” Buffy said slowly, shaking her head. “There were so many more of us sitting on that plane.”


She glanced up as a short blond guy sat down heavily beside herself and Sayid, muttering to himself.


“Does anyone else think we should be building a bonfire?” he asked; his accent very obviously British. “I mean, the rescue planes are going to fly right the bloody hell over us if we don’t give them some sign that we’re down here.”


“I think that is a very good idea.” Sayid replied, and he introduced himself with the shake of the other man’s hand. “I am Sayid.”


“Charlie.” The Brit replied. He looked expectantly at Buffy.


“Oh, it’s Buffy.” She said, wondering whether she too should be making with the hand shakes.


“Buffy?” Charlie replied with a quirked eyebrow, “Well that’s the bloody Americans for you.”


“Hey!” she exclaimed, and the three of them set about building the bonfire that would surly alert the rescue planes to their whereabouts.


It took twenty minutes or so to get a good fire blazing, and by that time the sun had set behind the tree tops of the jungle; leaving the island and all the survivors in near pitch darkness, despite the flickering light of the bonfire.


The forty eight survivors huddled in around the fire and Buffy found herself squashed up next to a very pretty, but also very pregnant, Australian girl named Claire.


“I’m scared.” The girl confessed, fiddling nervously with her wavy blond hair. “D’you think the rescue planes will come tonight.”


“Of course they will.” Buffy said with all the conviction that she could muster. “I mean, they’ll be out looking and it’s not like they could miss this bonfire, even from a couple’a miles up, it’d still be visible.”


“Yeah.” Claire agreed, nodding and looking fully-convinced. “Yeah. You’re right. Course you’re right Buffy.”


Her hand splayed over her swollen belly and she rubbed soothing circles with her fingers, whilst focusing on her careful heavy breathing.


“Is she alright?” asked Charlie, and Buffy nodded.


“She’s fine.”


Her eye was caught once more by the Korean couple who had begun arguing again. Buffy watched them through the flickering flames, and even from her considerable distance, she could still recognise the hurt and pain on the woman’s face. It was so obvious to Buffy, she wondered why the woman’s husband couldn’t see it also. The young Slayer had to wonder why he persisted in yelling at her, when she already looked so unhappy.


“Dude.” Said a voice, and Buffy looked up to see an extremely large man standing behind her. “Those two could fight for the country.”


“I’m sure they’ll get tired of it soon.” Buffy said, and the large guy smiled.


“Here.” He held out a portion of food to her, and Buffy took it gratefully. Was it weird that she hadn’t even noticed how hungry she was until now? “I gathered everything I could from the wreckage and split it into equal portions. Enjoy dude.”


“Thanks.” She said, a slight smile lighting her face, “Thanks very much-”


“Hurley.” He supplied.


“Buffy.” She replied.


For a moment they shared a smile; the smile you use when you’re talking with strangers. And then Hurley handed a portion each to Charlie and Claire, before proceeding on to the next group of people.


“Great, more high quality aeroplane food.” Charlie muttered sarcastically as he fished through the small selection that Hurley had handed to him. “Vegetable lasagne. That’ll make a nice starter.”


Buffy watched as the Brit broke the seal using the small plastic fork that came with it, and then proceeded to dig in to the soggy looking meal.


“Ugh.” He said after one mouthful. “Cold.”


Beside him, Claire laughed, and when Charlie offered the cold lasagne to her instead, she took it gratefully, explaining, “I get cravings for all kinds of weirdness.” She dug in to the rather unpleasant looking food with a big grin on her face, faltering only after the fourth spoonful when she realised both Charlie and Buffy were still watching her. “It’s not weird.” She insisted.


Buffy laughed, shaking her head while Charlie patted the pregnant girl on the back.


Okay, so it certainly didn’t hurt to pass the time until they were rescued, making friends with each another.


They were all settling down together, laughing and chatting more than happily, when a strange noise began to rumble out from the jungle.


Through the flames, Buffy saw Sayid getting to his feet as the noise became more intense.


“What the bloody Hell is that?” asked Charlie, jumping up to a stand as his head whipped around nervously.


“Where’s it coming from?” Claire asked, joining him. She leaned back against him as the noise became more of a howl than a rumbling.


Buffy frowned as the people around her began to panic, mentally scanning her mind for some demon or creature that would create a noise like the one she’s hearing.


People began to scream and shout out in confusion as the trees shook.


“Is it coming towards us?” Buffy heard Shannon yelling. “Oh my God!”


And then, just as suddenly as it had begun, the howling came to an abrupt end and the island was suddenly incredibly silent. No one spoke as they stared around at each other. Buffy met eyes with Sayid, who looked feral and scared. Then she looked to the small boy, Walt, who stood close to his father’s side, looking more than a little bit terrified.


Suddenly, for the first time in months, Buffy was the Slayer again.


She was headed toward the jungle, and was halfway to the source of the sound when someone grabbed her arm, pulling her back.


“Are you crazy?” the dark-haired woman asked. “You can’t go in there.”


Buffy wanted to shake the woman off, it wouldn’t be hard. The grip she had on her arm was weak and the woman didn’t look too tough. But then she glanced back at the people around the bonfire; their eyes wide with fear and confusion, and she realised that to them she was just a teenaged girl. Not the Slayer. Not a fighter.


“I… I don’t know.” She stuttered carefully. “I just want to know what’s in there.”


More people stepped forward to pull her back. A tall man with designer stubble across his chin and the older man who had been eating an orange earlier.


“We’ll check it out tomorrow.” Designer Stubble said. “In daylight. Right now what we all need is a little sleep.” He looked at the dark haired woman as if they’d already formed an alliance. “Can you look after her?”


Buffy resented being referred to when she was standing right beside them, but she said nothing.


The woman nodded.


“I’m Kate.” She told Buffy.


“And I’m Jack.” Designer Stubble added.


“Buffy.” The young Slayer replied, and she walked slowly back to the fire side. As she sat back down beside Charlie and Claire, she realised that eventually they were going to need her help, but before she could help them, they’d have to except that she wasn’t a normal teenager. And she definitely wasn’t a kid.


As she fell asleep on the warm sand that night, her last thought was once again about the bleached blond enemy she had bumped into on the plane earlier that day. And as she drifted away to oblivion, she had to momentarily wonder what had happened to him when the plane had crashed, and where his ashes now invariably lay.

…………………………………………………..


“Kate and I are going into the jungle.” Jack said the next morning, once he had everyone’s attention. “We’re going to try and find the rest of the fuselage.”


“If we can find the cockpit, we might be able to use the plane’s transceiver to radio for help.” Kate added, her tone explanatory.


“If it’s broken,” Sayid said, “Which is very likely, considering the impact from the crash, I may be able to fix it. I have quite a lot of experience with electricals.”


“Great.” Said Jack, “You should set about trying to retrieve anything that could help from the wreckage-”


“Sayid.”


“Sayid. Thank you.”


“Not a problem, good luck.” Sayid left the group and began making his way back toward the wreckage.


“I’m coming with you.” Charlie announced, rubbing his nose. “I can help. I’m coming.”


Jack and Kate both regarded him, before shrugging and nodding.


“Sure.” Jack said, “We could do with an extra pair of hands.”


Buffy saw her moment, and grabbed for it.


“I’m coming too.” She announced, crossing her arms. “Believe me, I can handle it.”


“No.” Jack didn’t even consider before answering.


“What?” Buffy asked, more than a little outraged. “Why the Hell not?”


Jack decided it was probably best to be straight with the girl, and he said. “Buffy, you’re just a kid. I’m not going to risk you. Just stay here; you can help sort through the salvaged luggage.”


Buffy looked utterly disgusted by his command, who had made him the boss of the island anyway? She was the goddamned Slayer!


“I’m coming.”


“No you’re not.”


“Yes, I am.”


“No you’re not.”


“Yes, I am.”


The other survivors watched this exchange with confused and surprised looks on their faces.


“Buffy, you’re just a kid.”


“I’m seventeen!”


“Exactly my point. This could be dangerous, and as a doctor-”


“Oh please, “ Buffy muttered, rolling her eyes.


“Buffy, I’m not going to allow you to come, whatever you say.” Jack said, crossing his arms with finality as if he were her father. It made Buffy want to stick her tongue out and sulk, which was weird, considering she’d felt like nothing but an adult in months. “Are you going to help the others sort the luggage?”


Then she had a sudden brainwave.


“Spike.” She said, forcing a few pretend tears into her eyes, hoping they would give her the power to manipulate. “I… I need to find him.”


At this, Kate’s face softened slightly.


“Spike?” she asked, “Is that who you were flying to LA with?”


Buffy nodded, looking down. “He’s not here.” She glanced around at her fellow survivors, forcing herself to improvise. “He was sitting right next to me; blinding me with the glare from his stupid bleach blonde hair.’ she sniffled a little, “He can’t be that far, and he might be with the fuselage. Even if he’s dead, I just want to look for him.”


“Buffy…” Jack’s voice was slightly kinder now, “I understand how you feel, but running off into the jungle to look for your friend is not going to help at all. In fact, it’ll be dangerous and-”


“No,” Buffy was shaking her head. “You gotta let me go. Come on Jack, it’s not like you’re in charge of-”


“Buffy, Jack’s just looking out for you.” Kate interrupted. “He’s not just some guy, he’s a doctor and I think that you should listen to him on this one.”


Buffy knew their level-headed and rational voices were making her look like a crazy and irrational child, and although she knew she could help them, she also knew it’d take time for them to trust her; to understand who and what she was. So she looked down, accepting that now was not that time.


“Fine.” She said.


“We’ll look for him for you Buffy.” Kate said reassuringly, and Buffy looked up again.


“Huh?”


“Spike.” Kate said. “We’ll look for him for you.”


“Oh,” Buffy said, yeah right- as if she cared! “Right, thank you guys.”


Half an hour later, Jack, Kate and Charlie were setting off into the jungle, and Buffy was wearing her indifferent face as she lay on the beach, gossiping with Shannon and Claire.

…………………………………………………


They were running; their feet pounding against the compact earth as they tried to avoid the twisted tree roots.


In filthy hands, Jack gripped the plane’s transceiver that they’d managed to salvage, though it was broken, like Sayid had warned them, and the heavy weight was throwing him off balance.


“Jack!” Kate yelled as he began to lag behind herself and Charlie, “Are you okay?”


“I’m fine!” he yelled back, spurred forward by that same howling noise they had heard the night before. A sound made all the more terrifying by -whatever it was-‘s close proximity.


Rain fell in sheets around them; drenching them to the bone and forcing them to hunch over like old men as they continued to run from the horrifying noises coming from behind them.


Finally, however, the rain began to lessen, until eventually it was just a light drizzle, and though they continued to run for a little longer, they soon realized that the monstrous noise had stopped.


Charlie was the first to stop, and he bent over clutching him knees as he panted, “What the bloody Hell was that thing?”


“This doesn’t make sense.” Kate said, shaking her head adamantly; wet hair cascading around her face in sodden chunks. “None of this makes any sense.”


“This island…” Jack said, tilting his head back and staring up at the canopy of treetops above them. “This whole island doesn’t make sense.” He squinted as he noticed something, “What’s…”


The others looked up too, and they were all sickened by the sight of the pilot’s limp and bloody body hanging from the tree.


“D’you think…” Charlie started.


“That… creature.” Jack finished, “Whatever it is- it killed him.”


“Oh God, what could do that to a man?” Muttered Charlie, shaking his head. “This can’t be real.” In his pocket, his hand clenched around the small sachet of heroine that he’d managed to salvage from the wreckage; his real reason for wanting to join Jack and Kate on their expedition. “This can’t be real. None of it.”


“It’s real.” Said Jack, though his head was still shaking in subconscious denial. “We have to get out of here.”


“Wait!” Kate shouted as the other two began to run again, “What’s that?”


Jack faltered first, following Kate’s pointed finger to where a man lay crumpled in amongst the undergrowth.


“What is it?” Charlie asked wearily, not wanting to look, just in case it was something gruesome.


“Bleach blond hair.” Noted Kate.


“It’s the man that the teenager told us to look out for.” Jack said; looking sad. “He must be dead.”


Kate walked forward slowly, as if planning to check for a pulse, but Jack pulled her back.


“Doctor remember.” He said, “It’s okay; I’ll do it.”


He stepped ahead of Kate, and his heart thudded a little at the prospect of seeing this man broken beyond recognition. He had barely been able to keep his lunch down after seeing the pilot suspended above them and dripping blood, from the tree.


He leaned down and turned the man over; surprised to the point of blanching to find that the man was near-perfect, with not a scratch visible on him.


But then his fingers sought out the sensitive place on his neck, and he shook his head as he called back to the other two;


“He’s dead.”

…………………………………………………………….
A/N: Well, that was episode one and I really hope that you enjoyed it. The next episode will be up in a week’s time so prepare yourselves :] Thank you very much for reading, and please review if you liked what you found!
Thanks guys, love dee__x
………………………………………………………………




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