Disclaimer: The characters belong to Joss. The song lyrics are from the Elton John song "Cold."
Summary: Guess who Willow finds drunk?
Distribution: If you want it, just mail me and ask for it. I'll say yes but I'd like to know where it's going to be posted.
Rating: Strong language, rated PG-13 or higher.
Homepage: http://scsu.ctstateu.edu/~sabia/homepage.htm
Author's Notes: Basically, I wrote this to put in my new archive! I also thought the idea of Spike getting drunk and singing an Elton John song to be hilarious. I might write a sequel to this! Thoughts are inclosed by brackets < >.
Willow jumped as she heard the sound of a gun going off. She had been sitting on a park bench for most of the evening, moping. The loud noise broke her thoughts. < What's going on? With all of the demons and nasties on top of the Hellmouth, who would use a gun? >
She started to run toward the sound, ready to help anyone in need. < What am I doing? I can't fight off an attacker! But I have to do something. With Buffy gone, there's no one who can help. >
Actually ever since Buffy left, there had been virtually no trouble whatsoever. Spike and Drusilla seemed to have disappeared. Neither Angel, nor Angelus were around. And there was no demon activity.
The closest thing to a demon was Snyder. He seemed incredibly pleased with himself now that he had expelled Buffy. Snyder was almost a little too pleased with himself. Willow was very tempted to hack into the IRS computer system and mess around with his files. < I think he's definitely the person who deserves a good auditing. > Willow ran across the park until she reached the bottom of the largest hill in the park. She remembered back to when she and Xander were six. They had gotten into an argument over his silly GI Joe dolls. That's when he got angry and pushed her. She rolled down the hill and ended up scraping her knees and elbows.
There was a lone figure sitting on top of the hill. He was sitting on the grass and drinking out of a bottle.
He stopped and yelled, "Bloody 'ell!" That's when Willow knew exactly who was up there. His accent had thickened intensely because he was so drunk.
Spike threw the bottle out into the air. With a quick motion, he pulled out a gun and shot at the bottle. After the bottle exploded, its remains showered down in a rain of glass and cheap booze.
< Ohmygod! That's Spike! If he knows I'm here, he'll kill me or worse. >
Willow began to sneak away when it started...Spike began to sing very loudly and rather off key.
"Love 'urts so much
Love leaves a scar
'I don't love you' is like a stake
Being driven through your 'eart
But I don't care
I came back for you
Love is cruel, but I don't care
I wanted you, and I'm cold, cold, cold"
"Hey you! At the bottom of the 'ill! Don't you dare leave! Or I'll shoot your bleedin' 'ead off!" Willow froze in her tracks when Spike spoke. < Oh no! He's seen me! Maybe he'll be too drunk to recognize me.>
Spike began to yell at her again, "Get your ass up 'ere or I really will shoot you!" Slowly, Willow made her way up the hill to the agitated Spike. She sat down next to him. He looked over at her.
"Ey! Aren't you a friend of the Slayer!?! One of those Slayers-to-let or something. I don't know what the bloody 'ell you guys call yourselves."
"I'm Willow."
"Yeah, that little redhead who's 'as more than two brain cells to rub up 'gainst each other. Yeah, you 'ack up computers, don't you?"
"I'm a hacker."
"Whatever. Well, little 'ack-person, I've got to tell you something. I'm gonna kill the Slayer."
"So what else is new?" Willow's voice had a sharp sarcastic edge to it.
"But I've got a good reason! Dru's left me cuz I 'urt Angel. And since I 'urt Angel to help the Slayer...it's all her fault that Dru left me!"
"Bull!" She yelled. Spike focused on her with his surprised, bloodshot, blue eyes.
"Wha' you mean, luv?"
"The only reason you helped Buffy was to get rid of Angel, so you could get Dru. So don't blame Buffy for your actions." She glared at him and Spike seemed to cringe under her glance.
But then her gaze softened, "I don't blame you for what you did though. Actually I think its very sweet. You risked being branded a traitor to win back the woman you loved. I only wish that...Nevermind."
Willow turned away from him. Even through his drunken stupor, Spike could tell that something was bothering her. "Wha's wrong, luv? Did someone 'urt you?"
"Oz and I broke up. He's going off to college and he's going to start to touring and he's afraid of turning me into a werewolf and..." Tears began to flow down her cheeks.
"And 'e's got ten million other reasons why 'e wants to leave, except for the truth."
"And what is the truth!?!" She yelled at him.
"That 'e's afraid to commit. Even though I can't see why, you're a beautiful woman, inside and out."
"Yeah right."
Her tone was a little too bitter for Spike's tastes. "Oh bloody 'ell! I'm not going to sit around and listen to you badmouth yourself all night long."
There were a few minutes of silence. Spike went into the shopping bag behind him and pulled out another bottle of whiskey. He began to drink it down but stopped in the middle.
"Want some?" He fumbled as he tried to press the bottle in her hands. She handed the bottle back and shook her head.
"Come on, luv. Why don't you 'ave some?
"No."
"I think you need a drink."
"No thank you."
"I think you really need the bloody drink!" Spike growled at her and his features turn demonic.
"AND I SAID THAT I DIDN'T NEED IT!" She yelled right back at him. Willow then burst into tears.
"Aaaww shit, I'm sorry, Willow. I thought it might make you feel better." His features returned to their human form. Puzzled, he pulled her close. With her sobbing head on his chest, Spike started to rock her back and forth. "I'm sorry, luv," he tried to soothe her, "I never meant to 'urt you."
"I'm sssorry Spike, I've just been..." Realizing the position she was now in, Willow tried to push herself away. She finally did free herself and edged a few inches away. Willow hugged her knees. < Great, this is certainly the weirdest night I've ever had. All my friends have left me and I'm being comforted by one of my worst enemies, who happens to be really drunk. But if he's really that bad, then why has he been so nice to me? Is he as lonely as I am? >
Spike was really confused. He tried to straighten his thoughts in his liquor-addled brain. < Dammit, why are women so hard to understand!?! Everything I try to do or say seems to be wrong, > he took another sip of the whiskey, < Why is she being so nice to me? Is it because...she's alone? Wait a minute! That might be right! Buffy's gone. That werewolf boyfriend of hers is gone. That stupid Xander boy is prolly too busy trying to ram his tongue down that pretty rich bitch's throat. Screw them! >
Both of them sat lost in their thoughts. Until Spike broke the silence, "Thank you," he said softly.
"For what?"
"For caring. No one's ever cared for me."
Willow gave him a disbelieving stare. "Yeah right."
"Really. My mum was nothing but a tavern wench and I was born on the wrong side of the sheets."
"What does that mean?"
"It means that literally I'm a bastard. I have no father. That may be nothing these days but around two 'undred years ago, that was a big thing. So I worked at the inn with my mother. I was beaten daily which after a while was no big deal. Eventually, the innkeeper and his wife found out that I was a good cook. So instead of doing all the grunt work, I sweated my ass off in an 'ot kitchen. Didn't get paid much. All I got was two meals a day, a roof over my 'ead, and a tiny amount of pocket change."
"You can cook?"
"I used to be pretty good at it but over the years I lost practice. Vampire meals need little preparation. Well anyway, I was a ordinary guy. I worked and whenever I could I'd go out and party. One night there was this guy at the bar I usually went to. 'E was acting all lordly and being a pain in the ass. So we got into a fight. 'E beat the crap out of me and then took his revenge. 'E turned me into a vampire."
"That guy was Angel?"
"Yeah, 'ow did you know?"
"It's always smart to research the people that want to kill you."
Spike laughed, "Sorry Willow, nothing personal. But when you got a person trying to shove a stake in your heart...well, you understand."
"It's kind of like having a person wanting to drink all of your blood. You do whatever you can to save yourself," Willow smiled. There was a touch of sarcasm in her voice but Spike did not notice this.
"Exactly, so want did you find out 'bout me?"
"Well, you're called William the Bloody..."
He interrupted her, "Actually that's the short version. I'm usually called William the Bloody Bastard or William the Bloody Son of A Bitch or a few other rude things," he laughed loudly at his joke and when he stopped, he asked, "What else do you know?"
"You've killed two Slayers. You also gained the nickname Spike by torturing your victims with a railway spike."
"Well all of that is true but that's not where I got the name Spike from." Spike grinned at her. He looked just like a mischievous little boy.
"OK, where did you get the name Spike?"
"Think about it, luv."
One second later, a truly disgusting thought entered Willow's mind. Her face turned such a bright red that Spike could see it in the darkness. He burst out laughing. "SPIKE!" She barked at him. But he still continued laughing hard. Soon his laughter grew short. His face grew even more pale. "Willow, I..." He quickly jumped up and ran away. Willow ran after him, only to find him retching in the bushes. The smell was making her stomach turn but she managed to stay near him and tried to comfort him.
Spike's thoughts flew around his head as he continued to vomit. < Why is she still here? Here I am puking up my guts and she still hasn't left. Why couldn't Dru be as sweet as Willow? >
Finally the contents of his stomach were gone and Spike felt terrible. As he sat on the grass, he finally became fully aware of what Willow was doing. She had been and still was rubbing his back and whispering reassuring things to him. When she noticed that he was staring at her, Willow quickly stopped her actions.
After a few minutes of embarrassed silence, Willow spoke, "How much did you have to drink?"
"About eight bottles."
Willow nodded. "All right then, we're going home." She stood up and held out her hand.
"You don't know where I live."
"But I know where I live. I'm taking you to my house. My parents are away on yet another business trip. Somebody has to take care of you."
"You'd have to invite me in."
"Duh!" She shook her head and grabbed his arm, "Now are you coming or am I going to have to leave you here?"
"But I'm a vampire. I could hurt you."
"You won't," her voice was soft. Spike slowly let her help him off the ground and let her lead him to her house. When they reached the door, she softly said, "Come in, Spike."
They managed to get upstairs where he passed out on a bed.
Spike woke up with the worst headache in his life. He groaned and tried to get up, only to be stopped by someone gently pushing him back down. He tried to focus on the person but it only made his head hurt even more.
"Ssshh, it's going to be all right. Everything's fine," she whispered.
That's when he realized who it was. "Willow?" He asked.
"Yes, you have a hangover." He noticed that she was speaking softly and that she moved slowly.
"Vampires don't get hangovers."
She then chuckled, "After eight bottles of whiskey, I'm not surprised that your head hasn't melted."
Spike grinned at her and found out that even smiling hurt.
"Spike, do you think that you could drink something?"
"Yeah." Willow helped the vampire sit up. Once he was secure, she put a glass to his mouth. He took a sip and was shocked to find out that it was blood, human blood. "Willow!"
"I'm sorry it's cold but I had to keep it in the fridge or it would have spoiled."
"Where did you get this?" The one sip of blood was starting to clear Spike's head. He looked over at Willow who was avoiding his gaze. Spike's eyes were drawn down and then he saw the bandage on her wrist.
"You bled yourself!?! Do you know how dangerous that is!?!" he yelled at her.
"It's about as dangerous as inviting a vampire into your house," her tone was firm, "But I figured you'd need it to get better. And I don't want to spend the day with a hungry vampire. Besides, when I was younger I wanted to be a doctor and I studied a little bit of medicine. I know the safe amount blood that can be taken out of a person. Spike, are you drink that or are you going to let it go bad?"
He glared at her but quickly drank down the half glass of blood. The effects of the blood kicked in very quickly. Spike immediately felt better. He tried to get up but Willow stopped him again.
"It's only one o'clock in the afternoon, you can't leave now. Why don't you rest and leave when its dark?"
Something in him paused. < Is she trying to keep me here? A trap? No, why would she help me and then try to kill me. If she wanted me dead, Willow could have left me drunk in the park. I probably would have passed out and the sun would have gotten me. > He lay back on the bed and fell asleep.
OK, so maybe it was a little nerve-wracking to have a vampire in your house but Willow wasn't going to let it get to her. She heated something up for dinner in the microwave. After finishing the meal, she went into the living room to watch a movie.
< What should I watch? Hhhmmm, maybe some comedy, it would make me feel better. >
She grabbed the movie, Spaceballs, and popped it into the VCR.
Willow laughed through the movie until her favorite part came up. Dark Helmet was playing with his dolls. Just as his doll killed the Lone Star doll, Willow heard a laugh behind her. She jumped up and whirled around.
Spike was standing there, smiling at the movie. "Sorry I surprised you, luv. Didn't mean to scare you."
"That's all right," she smiled at him.
"Well, I got to get going. See you around." Spike's heart wrenched when he saw her face fall.
"I'll show you to the door." They walked over to the door and she opened it. It was a clear night. They stood there, both unwilling to leave.
"Good-bye Willow, and thank you."
"It was nothing." < Why did I say that? > Willow thought, < Ask him to stay...or at least say SOMETHING! > But she couldn't.
After a thick silence, Spike spoke, "No it wasn't." He then strode away into the night.
Willow went back into the house. She slumped down on the couch and for the oddest reason, she wanted to cry.
A week had passed and Spike was pissed. < How dare they! Those idiots are supposed to be her so-called friends and they've been doing nothing but ignoring her! > Spike had gained a routine to his nights. He'd grab someone to eat and head on over to Willow's house, to check on her. Of course, he never told her that he was doing this. He'd simply look inside from a window.
Willow spent almost every night alone. She'd watch videos, use the computer, read, or anything to keep herself busy. And Spike would watch her from the shadows, wanting to go in but not having the courage to go ring the bell.
One night, Xander did show up and, he and Cordelia dragged her to the Bronze. Spike watched from the corner as Willow spent the entire night just sitting there at the table. Xander and Cordelia spent the entire night on the dance floor, engaging in a standing version of foreplay.
Red hot anger coursed through Spike's veins as he stormed out of the club. He tried to calm down in the alleyway outside the club but he couldn't. The vision, of Willow sitting there with a fake smile on her face and a sorrowful lonely look in her eyes, just wouldn't leave him alone.
"Spike?" A familiar voice whined.
He silently watched as Drusilla stepped out from the darkness. As much as she pretended to innocence, Drusillia was a creature of the night. If the eyes are truly the windows to the soul, then her dark eyes were usually either vacant and glazed or raging and insane.
"Spike," she whimpered, "I can't find my Angel. He's been taken away to a dark lovely place, filled with fire and pain."
Spike scowled at her. "Why should I care? You said you hated me. So what the hell do you want now?"
She sashayed over to him. Her hands glided up his arms, onto his shoulders where they paused. Her dark eyes looked faintly seductive. She stood up on tiptoe and began to kiss his neck. Finally she got to his ear, which she whispered into, "Aren't you going to take care of your Princess?"
Spike tried to say something but instead was hit with a wall of confusion. < What do I say? Do I still want her? Do I want to pamper and coddle her for the rest of eternity? > Finally the way was clear. Spike knew exactly what to do. "Yes Dru, I'm going to take care of MY Princess."
He grabbed Drusilla in his arms and kissed her fiercely. The kiss lasted for several minutes. Ending it in the middle, he shoved her away. Drusilla fell to the ground like a limp rag doll.
"Well, I think that made a good kiss good-bye," he said nonchalantly.
"SPIKE!?!"
"I said I was going to take care of my Princess, not Angelus' whore." Spike then walked away, not really listening to Drusilla's screams and curses.
< Last night certainly was a waste, > Willow thought as she typed away on the computer, < I sat around and held Xander and Cordelia's table while they made-out on the dance floor. And when I left early without telling anyone, the only acknowledgment I got is Xander calling me to complain that someone stole their table. To think, I used to have a crush on him! Boys! >
She gave off a small disgusted noise as she clicked the mouse. Willow scanned about but found none of her on-line friends. As she turned off the computer, the doorbell rang.
She ran down the stairs and got to the door. "Who is it?"
"It's me...Spike," the muffled voice replied. At first, she hesitated, < Is he here to kill me? But I didn't do that 'lock-out' spell that I used to keep Angel out. If he wanted to kill me, he would have broken in or caught me when I went out. Would he? >
Cautiously, she opened the door. An uncomfortable-looking Spike stood there with a grocery bag in his hands.
"What do you want, Spike?"
"I brought you something to eat...as...as a way to say thank you." He pulled a container out of the bag. "It's just a simple beef stew. Actually it was my second try, I burnt the first try. But after a little practice it all came back to me. If you don't want anything to do with me, that's fine. But, Willow, I promise to never try hurt you again..." As Spike continued to babble, Willow smiled. "Spike," she interrupted him, "Won't you come in? I'd love to try some of your stew and maybe we could watch a movie afterward."
She grabbed the surprised vampire's arm and pulled him into the house. Willow closed the front door. She grinned at Spike, "And if you liked Spaceballs, you'll love Robin Hood: Men in Tights."
The End