"Surprise"
Quotes



Angel: "Not every dream you have comes true. I mean, what else did you dream
last night? Can you remember?"
Buffy: "I dreamt...I dreamt that Giles and I opened an office supply warehouse in
Vegas."
Angel: "See my point?"

Buffy: "I like seeing you first thing in the morning."
Angel: "It's bedtime for me."
Buffy: "Well, then I like seeing you at bedtime. Um, um, ha...you-you know what
I mean."
Angel: "I think so. What do you mean?"

Willow: "'I like you at bedtime'? You actually said that?"
Buffy: "I know, I know."
Willow: "Man, that's like...I don't know. That's moxie or something!"

Buffy: "He's cool about it."
Willow: "Well, of course he is, 'cause...he's cool. I mean, he would never...you
know."
Buffy: "Push."
Willow: "Right. He-he's not the type."

Willow: "Carpe diem. You told me that once."
Buffy: "Fish of the day?"
Willow: "Not 'carp'! Carpe. It means seize the day."

Buffy: "Once you get to a certain point, then seizing is sort of inevitable."
Willow: "Wow."
Buffy: "Yeah."
Willow: "Wow."

Buffy: "Oh."
Willow: "Wow."

Willow: "I...I like his hands."
Buffy: "Mmm. Fixation on insignificant detail is a definite crush sign."

Buffy: "You think he's too old 'cause he's a senior? Please, my boyfriend had a
bicentennial."
Willow: "That's true."

Buffy: "You can't spend the rest of your life waiting for Xander to wake up and
smell the hottie. Make a move. Do the talking thing."
Willow: "What if the 'talking thing' becomes the 'awkward silence thing'?"

Willow: "Do you guys...uh, have a gig tonight?"
Oz: "Oh, no, practice. See, our band's kind of movin' towards this new sound
where...we suck, so...practice."

Willow: "I bet you have a lot of groupies."
Oz: "It happens. I'm livin' groupie-free nowadays. I'm clean."
Willow: "Oh."

Oz: "I'm gonna' ask you to go out with me tomorrow night, and I'm kinda'
nervous about it, actually. It's interesting."
Willow: "Oh, well, if it helps at all, I'm gonna' say 'yes'."
Oz: "Yeah, it helps. It-it creates a comfort zone."

Oz: "Do you wanna' go out with me tomorrow night?"
Willow: "Oh, I can't!"
Oz: "Well, see, I like that you're unpredictable."

Willow: "Well, you could be m...my date."
Oz: "Alright, I'm in."
Willow: "I said 'date'."

Xander: "So. Buffy's party. Maņana."
Cordelia: "Well, just because she's Ms. Save the World and everything, you
have to make a big deal? I have to cook, and everything!"
Xander: "You're cooking?"
Cordelia: "Well, I'm Chips and Dips Girl."
Xander: "Oh, horrors. All that opening and stirring."
Cordelia: "And shopping and carrying."
Xander: "Well then, you should have a person who does such things for you."
Cordelia: "Well, that's what I've been saying to my father, but does he listen?"

Xander: "Maybe we should just admit that we're dating."
Cordelia: "Groping in a broom closet isn't dating. You don't call it a date until
the guy spends money."
Xander: "Fine, I'll spend, then we'll grope, whatever."

Xander: "Forget it. Must have been my multiple personality guy talking. I call
him Idiot Jed, glutton for punishment."

Xander: "You ready to get down, you funky party weasel?"
Giles: "Here comes Buffy. Now remember, discretion is the better part of valor."
Xander: "You could have just said 'Shh.' God, are all you Brits such drama
queens?"

Xander: "Buffy! I feel a pre-birthday spanking coming on!"
Jenny: "I'd curb that impulse if I were you, Xander."
Xander: "Check. Cancel spanking."

Giles: "If Drusilla is alive, then it would--it could be a fairly...cataclysmic state of
affairs."
Xander: "Again, so many words! Couldn't you just say, 'We'd be in trouble'?"
Giles: "Go to class, Xander."
Xander: "Gone! Notice the economy of phrasing. 'Gone': simple, direct."

Drusilla: "It will be the best party ever."
Spike: "Why's that?"
Drusilla: "Because...it will be the last."

Joyce: "Mall trip for your birthday on Saturday. Don't forget."
Buffy: "Space on a Mom-sponsored shopping opportunity? Not likely."

Buffy: "You know, I woke up feeling more responsible, mature, and
level-headed."
Joyce: "Really? It's uncanny."

Buffy: "I now possess the qualities one looks for in a...licensed driver."
Joyce: "Buffy!"
Buffy: "You said we could talk about it again when I was seventeen."

Xander: "Hey, it's the woman of the hour!"
Willow: "It's Happy Birthday Buffy!"
Buffy: "..."
Willow: "Not Happy Birthday Buffy?"

Giles: "You dreamt that the Master had risen, but you stopped it from
happening."
Xander: "You ground his bones to make your bread."
Buffy: "That's true. Except for the bread part."

Giles: "Why don't you meet me here at seven? We'll map out a strategy."
Buffy: "What am I supposed to do until then?"
Giles: "Go to classes? Do your homework? Have supper?"
Buffy: "Right, be that Buffy."

Xander: "Well, that's not a perky birthday puppy."
Willow: "So much for our surprise party. I bought little hats and everything."

Giles: "We're having a party, tonight."
Xander: "Looks like Mr. Caution Man, but the sound he makes is funny."
Giles: "Buffy's surprise party will go ahead as we planned, except I won't be
wearing a little hat."

Xander: "You're a great man of our time."
Willow: "And anyway, Angel's coming, so she'll be able to protect him and have
cake."

Jenny: "He wants to meet you someplace near his house, 'cause he had to run
home and get a book or something."
Buffy: "'Cause heaven knows there aren't enough books in the library."

Buffy: "It's kind of manly, in an obsessive compulsive kind of way, don't you
think?"

Jenny: "Buffy, maybe you shouldn't."
Buffy: "Sorry. Sacred duty, yada yada."

Buffy: "Every time I see you, you're stealing something. You really should
speak with someone about this klepto issue."

Cordelia: "Surprise!"
Oz: "That pretty much sums it up."

Oz: "Hey, did everybody see that guy just turn to dust?"
Willow: "Oh, well, uh, sort of."
Xander: "Yup. Vampires are real. Lot of them live in Sunnydale. Willow will fill
you in."
Willow: "I know it's hard to accept at first."
Oz: "Actually, it explains a lot!"

Xander: "Well, clearly the Hellmouth's answer to 'What do you get the Slayer
who has everything?'!"

Willow: "What was that?"
Oz: "It looked like an arm."
Angel: "It can't be. She wouldn't."
Xander: "What? The vamp's version of snakes in a can or do you care to
share?"

Angel: "They call him the Judge."
Giles: "The Judge? This is he?"
Angel: "Not all of him."
Buffy: "Um, still needing backstory here."

Cordelia: "Is anybody else gonna' have cake?"

Jenny: "Angel."
Buffy: "What?"
Jenny: "You have to do it. You're the only one that can protect this thing."
Buffy: "What about me?"
Jenny: "What, you're just gonna' skip town for a few months?"
Buffy: "Months?"
Angel: "She's right. I gotta' get this to the remotest region possible."
Buffy: "Wha--but that's not months!"
Angel: "I could catch a cargo ship to Asia and maybe truck to Nepal..."
Buffy: "You know, those new-fangled flying machines really are much safer
than they used to be."

Drusilla: "Make a wish."
Dalton: "What?"
Drusilla: "I'm going to blow out the candles."

Spike: "He's a wanker, but he's the only one we've got with half a brain. If he
fails, you could eat his eyes out of his sockets for all I care."

Xander: "I mean, what kind of a future would she have really had with him?
She's got two jobs: Denny's waitress by day, Slayer by night. And Angel's
always in front of the TV with a big blood belly. And he's dreaming of the glory
days when Buffy still thought this whole creature of the night routine was a big
turn-on."
Willow: "You've thought way too much about this."
Xander: "No, no, that's just the beginning. Have I told you the part where I fly
into town in my private jet and take Buffy out for prime rib?"
Willow: "Xander."
Xander: "And she cries?"

Giles: "Where's Jenny?"
Buffy: "Uh, she took Angel to get clothing. I-I had some here."
Xander: "And we needed clothes because..."
Buffy: "We got wet."

Giles: "His touch can literally burn the humanity out of you. A true creature of
evil can survive the process. No human ever has."
Xander: "What's the problem? We send Cordy to fight this guy, and we go for
pizza."

Giles: "Round Robin?"
Willow: "It's when everybody calls everybody else's mom and tells 'em they're
staying at everyone's house."
Buffy: "Thus freeing us up for world saveage."
Willow: "And all-night keggers!"
Buffy & Giles: "..."
Willow: "What, only Xander gets to make dumb jokes?"

Willow: "I can't get over how cool Oz was about all this."
Xander: "Gee, I'm over it."

Giles: "Seems Buffy needed some rest."
Angel: "Yeah, she hasn't been sleeping well, tossing and turning."
Everyone: "..."
Angel: "She told me! 'Cause of her dreams?"

Drusilla: "He's perfect, my darling. Just what I wanted."

Drusilla: "Do it again! Do it again!"

Spike: "Well, well. Look who we have here: crashers."
Buffy: "I'm sure our invitations just got lost in the mail."

Angel: "Leave her alone!"
Spike: "Yeah, that'll work. Now say 'Pretty please'."

Angel: "Take me instead of her."
Spike: "Uh, you're not clear on the concept, pal. There is no instead. Just first
and second."

Angel: "I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop."

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