"The Girl in Question"
Angel and Gunn are walking through the upper floor lobby of W&H. Gunn urges Angel to act now.
Angel isn't willing, "Not without a full risk analysis. We don't want to be rushing into this thing half-cocked."
Gunn is impatient, "As opposed to the full-cock that's been working so well for us?"
Angel stops, crosses his arms over his chest and faces Gunn, "You got something you want to say?"
Gunn answers, "Just don't want to lose another baby with the bath water, boss."
Angel suggests they send Spike.
Spike is in Angel's office, sitting in the chair with his legs thrown over the arm of it, playing a handheld video game. "Bugger that. Do it yourself."
Gunn says it's a delicate matter that has to be handled with finesse. He looks at Angel, "And why the hell are we talking to him?"
Angel answers, "Because he signed on to help."
Spike continues playing his video game as he snipes, "Not to be a glorified garbage collector."
Gunn informs him, "It's not garbage, it's a body. And there's a bloody gang war coming our way if we don't get it back."
Spike wonders if the body is that important.
Gunn fills him in, "It's the body of the Capo di Famiglia of the Goran demon clan." He explains the capo kept a low profile, he was tolerant of humans and "more interested in profit than mayhem."
Angel asks what happened to him.
Gunn answers, he died on a business trip while in Italy. They need to go to Italy, retrieve the body, and return it to his family within 26 hours.
Spike wonders, "Or what, he gets deader?"
An agitated Gunn answers, "No, he stays dead. They die, they pupate, they live again." He looks at Angel, "But only if the proper rituals are performed by the immediate family." He looks back toward Spike, "If the capo's body isn't returned in time, the rituals won't take. So long capo, hello power vacuum."
Angel reckons the rival clans will try to fill that vacuum.
Gunn confirms that, "And they aren't as tolerant of humans. If we do this, it all stays cool. If not --"
Angel knocks Spike's legs off the arm of the chair, "We'll stick with do." He tells Spike to pack his bags as he takes the video game from him and sets it on the desk.
Spike puts his leg back on the arm of the chair as he protests, "I don't even speak the language."
Angel offers, "We'll get you a book." He picks up his phone which has been ringing.
Spike looks at Gunn, "How do you say 'wank off' in Italian?"
A frustrated Gunn wonders if someone can't just get on a plane.
Angel responds to the caller on the phone, "What? When? Yeah. I understand. Thanks." He hangs up.
Spike asks, "All right, what is it this time? Ubervamps? Demon gods? Devil robots?"
Angel answers quietly, "It's Buffy."
Angel throws the doors of his office open and exits into the lobby, "I said I'll take care of it."
Spike and Gunn follow him out. Gunn wants to know what Angel intends to take care of.
Spike asks if Buffy is okay.
Angel answers, "She will be when I get there."
Spike asks what happened. When he doesn't get an answer, he asks again, "What happened?"
Angel stops near Harmony's desk, turns to Gunn and Spike, "The Immortal."
Gunn asks who.
Spike answers, "The foulest evil hell ever vomited forth."
Harm looks at him, "Worse than you?"
Angel turns back toward the elevator, "He was spotted in Rome, near Buffy's --"
Gunn notes the capo died in Rome.
Spike reckons that's something the Immortal would do.
Angel agrees, "He whacks the capo, lures me to Rome, takes out a Slayer and a vampire with a soul."
Gunn adds, "Plus he starts a war when the capo's body isn't returned for resurrection. This guy's good."
Angel directs Harm to have the corporate jet made ready. He heads for the elevator, Spike joins him. "Do you really think we can take him?"
Angel had other plans, "Whoa, whoa. What do you mean, 'we'?"
Spike reckons Angel should have known he wouldn't let him go to Italy without him.
Angel reminds him, "You don't speak the language."
Spike says he'll get a book.
The elevator doors slide open as Angel huffs, "Spike, you're only going to make things worse."
As they get on the elevator, Spike reckons it's not complicated, "We get the capo's body, we rescue Buffy, we stop the Immortal. It's that simple. Unless he kills you, which, would be sad."
Angel punches the elevator button, "He's not gonna kill me."
Spike smiles, "Not if I'm with ya."
Angel and Spike are on the W&H jet. Angel reckons Spike plans to "ride in, save the day and sweep Buffy off of her --"
Spike figures Angel is thinking the same.
Angel shoots back, "I'm already seeing somebody."
Spike scoffs, "What? Dog girl?"
Angel tells him, "Nina's a werewolf and I --" ("Unleashed")
Spike interrupts, "Fido know her boyfriend's flying halfway around the world to visit his ex?"
Angel defends himself, "Hey, look. I was gonna call her and we're just ... hanging out. She's not my girlfriend."
Spike reckons, the way things are going, she never will be.
Angel doesn't figure it's any of Spike's business.
Spike smiles, "I just wanna see you happy. Well, not too happy, 'cause then, I'd have to stake ya." He considers that a moment, "Second thought, have at it."
Angel snaps, "This isn't about us."
Spike wonders if he means him and Nina.
Angel clarifies, "Me and you. This is a dangerous mission that's only gonna get worse if we don't put aside our differences. Look, we have to work together on this to stop the Immortal and save Buffy." After a moment he adds, "Oh, and pick up that demon body thingie."
Spike looks at him, "Partners then?"
Angel agrees, "Just like old times. You want a drink?"
Spike eagerly accepts, "God, yes."
Spike and Angel are still on the jet, drinking airline food service sized bottles of booze. Angel finishes off another bottle, "Huh. Really can't get drunk off these things.
Spike agrees, "Not us anyway. Vampire constitution, not always a plus. How'd you know?"
Angel looks at the empty bottle, "Drank a lot of 'em and I still don't like you."
Spike clarifies, "About Buffy. How did you know she was in trouble?"
Angel says he got word.
Spike asks from whom.
Angel answers simply, "A source."
Spike sees through that, "You've been spying on her?"
Angel insists he just wanted to know she was okay.
Spike continues needling, "Sending your lackeys to do your stalking for you. That is really pathetic."
Angel admits he's not proud of it "but it's ... it's Buffy."
Spike asks how many people Angel has watching her.
Angels says just one, "But he got spotted, called me from the hospital when he regained consciousness."
Spike thinks he should have had more people watching her.
Angel doesn't disagree with that, "We should be landing soon. Do you remember the last time we were in Italy?"
Spike remembers, "Like it was yesterday." Flash to a black and white scene of Spike and Dru in a club sometime in the '50's. They're standing with a group of people, all repeating, "Ciao".
Angel notes he wasn't in Italy in the '50's.
Spike recalls, "Oh, right. Guess you weren't. Really missed out."
Angel notes that sounds better than the last time he remembers being there.
Spike recalls as well, "1894?"
Angel confirms that, "The room of pain."
Rome, 1894
Angelus and William are in a room, hung from the ceiling by manacles on their wrists. Angelus struggles with the manacles, trying to pull loose. He notices William is out of it and bumps against him, "William!"
He comes to, looks up at his manacled wrists and down at his half-dressed body, "That right bastard!"
Angelus is indignant as he continues trying to work loose, "The Immortal thinks he can do this to us."
William reckons the Immortal is in for a surprise, he'll curse the day he crossed their path.
They continue to jerk on the manacles binding their wrists, trying to work free.
The door opens, a man dressed in a suit enters, backed by bigger guys armed with crossbows.
Angelus makes threats, "Your master send you to do his dirty work? Ferry us to hell, then? Well, save a spot for him, next to the fire, the mangy, dung lickin' --"
The well dressed man steps forward and slaps Angelus across one cheek, then the other, with a glove.
Angelus looks at him, "A bit over the top now, aren't ya?"
The man unlocks the manacles and releases Angelus, "His benevolence, the Immortal, wishes to convey his regrets at having detained you." He releases William, "But your recent actions against his concerns merited stiff reprimand."
Angelus says the city is theirs, they were there first.
The man informs him the Immortal was there first, 300 years ago. "And now he's back. You will leave this city tonight and never return on pain of death so swift --"
Talky guy gets a lesson in swift death as Angelus snaps his neck. Angelus warns the men with the crossbows, "Go ahead, take your best shot. I'll snatch your little wee sticks out of the air and spend the next fortnight shoving 'em slowly up your arse." The men run away.
William wonders, "Can you really do that?"
Angelus answers, "The arrow thing? I don't know. Never tried." As he picks up his shirt, lamenting its condition, "Look what he did to me shirt!"
William pulls his trousers on, "His benevolence, the Immortal."
Angelus considers his plans for him as he continues getting dressed, "In for a shock, he is. There's gonna be a reckoning after a good meal and a long rest in the arms of ..."
Angelus and William arrive back at their room to find a spent Darla, lying on the bed, covered only by the bedding. Angelus calls her name.
William wonders what was done to her.
In the W&H lobby, Illyria touches one of the plants, "I can no longer hear the song of the green."
Wes and Lorne watch from a short distance away. Lorne is holding a drink and wondering if that includes him.
Wes explains, "Her powers have been greatly reduced. She still has an unusual level of strength but is no longer invulnerable or able to alter time."
Illyria has lost none of the attitude, "You revel in my defeat."
Wes asks if that's how she sees it, "You've been defeated?"
She answers, "My world gone. My power stripped. How would you define it?"
As they move toward her, Lorne offers, "Uh, I don't know. How about lucky we didn't kill you when you went nuclear?" ("Time Bomb")
She turns to them, "This fate is worse than death. Condemned to live out existence in a vessel incapable of sustaining my true glory." She turns away, "How am I to function with such limitation?"
Lorne offers his drink, "Well, have you ever tried a Sea Breeze?"
Illyria isn't amused as she steps toward him, "You attempt amusement at the expense of your better."
Wes steps up to diffuse the situation, "Illyria. Perhaps you should return to the lab."
She doesn't intend to do what she's told, "I do not bend to your wishes."
Wes says that's not what he's asking, "Merely suggesting that more tests might lead to knowledge of how to help you function."
That's phrasing she's willing to accept, "I go because it suits me." She heads up the steps.
Lorne notes it's too bad she didn't lose some of the "sass" as well.
Wes reckons she's "posturing."
Lorne wonders if he's saying, "She really wasn't gonna, like, snap my stalk?"
Wes concedes though her powers are weakened, she remains unpredictable and likely will be until she learns to adjust. "We have to be careful not to agitate her."
Lorne looks toward the elevator which opens behind Wes, "Burkles!"
Wes turns to see Fred's parents exit the elevator. Roger Burkle tells his wife he knew they'd remember them.
Wes asks rather curtly, "Why are you here?" He softens his tone, "I mean, what --"
Roger tells him they decided to take the trip to Hawaii they've been saving years for and chose a layover so they could spend some time with Fred. He asks Wes if he knows where they can find her.
Wes invites them into his office as Illyria watches from the landing above.
In Rome, Spike and Angel are outside an apartment door. Angel knocks, "Let me handle this."
Spike is sure he wants to.
Andrew opens the door and greets Spike cheerfully with a hug as Angel peers around him, into the apartment. Andrew asks what they're doing there.
Angel notes, "About to ask you the same question, Andrew."
Andrew claims Buffy and Dawn let him stay at their place because his was "incinerated when that thing happened." He blames it on a "cultural misunderstanding." He'd prefer to talk of more pleasant things. He invites them inside, "I part my threshold. I mean, my apartment, obviously."
Angel and Spike both try to enter at the same time, causing them to get stuck briefly in the doorway until Angel elbows his way through.
Andrew nervously tidies the place up, noting he had plans for later that evening but he's willing to cancel if they want to hang out. He offers to show them the city, "anywhere you want to go, anything you want to see."
Angel and Spike both answer at the same time, "Buffy."
Andrew tells them she isn't there, she went to meet "the Immortal."
Spike is concerned, "By herself?"
Andrew reminds him he did mention he had plans.
Angel asks when she left.
Andrew answers, they just missed her.
Spike reckons they're not too late.
Angel figures it could be worse.
Andrew flops down the couch, "Most nights they never leave the house, just curl up on the couch and snuggle."
Angel and Spike look at him. Angel finally asks, "They're .. snuggling?"
Andrew straightens out the couch pillow, "For starters. Wait. Uh ... You didn't know they were ... together?"
Spike reckons it just got worse.
Rome, 1894
Angelus calls to Darla as he rushes to the bed and turns her over onto her back. "What have they done, my sweet death."
Darla wakes and smiles, "Angelus, you're back."
He assures her, "I'd claw my way back from the depths of hell to lay by your side." He leans over and kisses her, then pulls back in disgust as he shoves her back. "He's tasted you."
William asks who he's talking about.
Angelus answers, "Who do you think?"
William understands who he's referring to, "Well, that cheeky bastard. Had us tossed then violates your woman."
Angelus asks Darla if the Immortal hurt her.
She smiles, "Not until I asked him to." She rolls out of bed, wrapping the comforter around herself, as she muses dreamily. "Oh, come on. Have you seen him? With the eyes and the chest and the ... immortality."
William points out a bit defensively, "We're immortal."
Darla turns her back to them, drops the comforter and pulls on a robe. "Not like him. I mean, he's not some common vampire. He's ... I don't know what he is." She turns toward them, "A giant, a titan straddling good and evil serving no master but his own considerable desires. And spiritual! Did you know he spent 150 years in a Tibetan monastery? Which I guess explains all the desire."
Angelus tells her, "He's my arch-nemisis."
Darla assures him, "Oh, darling. It was just fornication." She chuckles, "Really great fornication."
William notes she's glowing.
Angelus doesn't want to hear it, "She isn't."
Darla disagrees, "Little bit!"
William looks at Angelus, "Best fit you for a pair of antlers. Been made the right cuckold, you have."
A half-dressed Dru comes out of another room and asks dreamily, "Time for another pony ride?"
William realizes Angelus isn't the only one fit for antlers as he stares at Dru, "Son of a bitch!"
Angelus looks at Darla, "The both of ya?"
Darla smiles, "He's insatiable."
William shouts in disbelief, "Drusilla, you let him touch you?!"
Dru closes her eyes and raises her hands into the air as she slowly sways back and forth. "He felt like sunshine."
William doesn't want to hear it.
Angelus thinks this was the plan, "That's why he had us tossed, so he could violate --"
Darla tries to tell him, "He didn't --"
Angelus insists, "Violate our women!"
William points toward the women, "Violate! In succession!"
Darla corrects him, "Concurrently."
Angelus looks at Darla, "You never let us do that."
Darla suggests to Dru they take a bath, "so the boys can weep in private."
Dru asks if she'll hold her under the water.
Darla agrees, "If you wish."
They put their arms around each other and leave the room, giggling.
An angry Angelus picks up something nearby and tosses it across the room, into the wall. "This is a slight that will not go unmet."
William thinks death is too quick.
Angelus reminds him not all death is quick. He reckons it's time the Immortal discovered who he's dealing with, it's time for "blood vengeance."
Rome, 1894
Angelus and William are outside of a club, facing a guy in a tux standing outside the door. The man is holding a sheet of paper. Angelus tells him, "Blood vengeance. I'm sure we're on the list. Is there anything under blood vengeance?"
The man checks his list, noting he doesn't find anything like that listed.
William suggests he check under Angelus.
The man insists they aren't on the list.
They try to rush the door but are knocked back by an invisible barrier. The man firmly informs them, they aren't on the list, they aren't getting inside.
Angelus and William step back. Angelus complains, "He mocks us at every turn."
William recalls, "The man has no sense of indecency. You remember Frankfurt? He hatches the Rathruhn egg personally and then just decides to give those nuns safe passage."
An angry Angelus remembers, "Those were my nuns!"
William agrees, "Yeah, nuns are your thing. Everybody knows that." They both look at the guy guarding the door as Spike continues, "They respect it. They respect us."
Angelus rants, "We're the reason men fear the night." He warns an unseen Immortal it's not over, "This will never be over!"
Rome, present
Spike and Angel are in the foyer of a house where they're awaiting delivery of the capo's body, a demon stands a bit away from them. Spike laments, "It's over. Just like that." He looks at Angel, "Not that I thought I had a chance anyway."
Angel notes, "At least I have a girlfriend."
Neither can quite get over the fact it's the Immortal Buffy is with. Spike thinks she's smarter than that.
Angel thinks so too, "She'd never fall for a centuries-old guy with a dark past who may, or may not, be evil."
Spike reckons she must be under a spell.
Angel agrees, he was thinking the same thing.
They figure they'll pick up the capo's body, then find the Immortal and break the spell.
An elderly demon woman enters the foyer, carrying a bowling ball sized bag. She sets the bag on the table and thanks Angel for "tending to a delicate matter."
Angel looks at the small bag, puzzled, "Um .. this is the, uh .. Capo Di Famiglia of the Goran demon clan?"
The demon woman confirms that.
Spike looks at the bag, "Must have been a wee fella."
Angel opens the bag and peers inside, "This is just his head."
The demon woman insists that's the capo.
Spike wonders what happened to the rest of him.
She explains, "When a Goran demon becomes heavy with the age, his head sag and drop off like a ripe fig."
Angel asks if the new body hatches from the head.
She confirms that, "If the rituals are performed by the family in time." She insists he must get the head to Los Angeles right away.
Spike and Angel are back at Buffy's apartment. Andrew answers the door. Angel asks if she's returned yet.
Andrew points out it's only 8:30.
Angel asks if he knows where they went.
Wes escorts Roger and Trish Burkle into his office. They marvel at the accommodations, noting it's a step up from the Hyperion. Roger admits they were a little concerned about the "old hotel" but Fred "called it home" so they didn't say anything about it.
Trish figures, "Girl reaches a certain age, she earned the right to make her own decisions."
As they chatter on, an uncomfortable Wes tries to break the news, "Mr. and Mrs. Burkle --"
They ask him to address them by their first names, noting with all Fred has told them about her friends, they almost feel like family. Roger asks where Fred is, "Out saving the world with that nice Angel fella?"
Wes tries again to explain, "Roger, Trish. There's something you need to know." He takes a deep breath, "Fred --"
He's interrupted by Illyria imitating Fred. She enters the office looking and sounding just like Fred, "Mom?"
A shocked Wes looks toward the doorway as Illyria/Fred smiles and rushes toward the Burkles, "Dad! Oh my God! What are y'all doing here?" She offers hugs as they gush about how great she looks, how good it is to see her.
Wes looks on, stunned.
In Rome, Angel and Spike are in a crowded club. As they work their way toward the bar through the throng of dancers, Angel frets, "Dancing. Why'd it have to be dancing?"
When they reach the bar, Spike asks the bartender if she speaks English.
She confirms she does.
Angel tells her they're looking for an American girl then describes Buffy. He tells her the girl is a friend of theirs.
Spike adds she's in trouble, "This ponce, called the Immortal --"
The woman knows who they're referring to now, "Si, si. The Immortal's new ragazza. They come, while ago." She looks across the dance floor, "There."
They see the back of a blond woman, dancing. Spike tells Angel, "Hold down the fort. I'll be right back."
Angel isn't planning on staying behind. He follows Spike across the dance floor, "Oh yeah, here it comes. The part where you run off alone and play the big hero so Buffy'll take you back. Well, newsflash Blondie Bear, never gonna happen."
They stop in the middle of the dance floor to continue the discussion. Spike counters, "Look, I know I don't have a shot with her, all right? Probably never did but I still care about her and I'm not gonna let her end up with a jerk like the Immortal, or you." He moves toward Buffy.
Angel follows, "Ours is a forever love."
Spike reminds him, "I had a relationship with her, too."
Angel scoffs, "Okay, sleeping together is not a relationship."
Spike disagrees, "It is if you do it enough times."
Angel stops as he realizes something, "Spike. The head."
Spike thought Angel had it.
Angel looks back toward the bar and sees the demon who was lurking in the foyer with them earlier lifting the bag and absconding with it.
Spike shouts at the demon then appears in front of him, "Where do you think you're going with our head, Jeeves?"
Several burly guys encircle Spike and Angel as one of them answers the question, "Anywhere he wants."
Angel looks around, wondering if they couldn't discuss this over a drink.
Fight ensues in slow motion. Once the minions are dispatched, Spike punches Angel which appears to be accidental, the first time. Angel rubs his jaw then punches Spike. They both hit each other at the same time. Angel asks, "What the hell are you doing?"
Spike shouts, "I was confused, ya git! It's very loud in here!"
Angel looks around the club for the demon, "Where'd the little guy go?"
They look toward the door and see the demon make his exit. They follow.
They rush into the street outside the club and are nearly run down by a speeding red convertible. Angel recognizes it, "Hey! That's our car!"
Spike jumps on a Vespa scooter parked nearby, revs the engine and pulls it up next to Angel. "Hop on, little mama."
Angel insists he's not riding on the back.
Spike points out, "He's getting away!"
Angel reluctantly climbs on the back of the Vespa and wraps his arms around Spike. Spike takes off in pursuit of the convertible.
Tires screech as the convertible weaves through the streets, around tight corners. Quite a bit behind, the boys follow on the scooter.
Angel urges Spike to speed it up.
Spike tells him to stop holding on so tight.
The pursuit continues. They manage to gain ground when the convertible is sidetracked by a pedestrian in the road. Angel directs Spike to turn right, take a shortcut. As Angel continues giving directions, they find themselves facing the convertible's headlights. The car rams the scooter, knocking the boys off of it and then is driven off.
Angel is frustrated, "One job, you know? Hang onto the head. That's it."
Spike reminds Angel he was there too.
Angel points out he wasn't in charge of the head.
Spike doesn't reckon it matters, it's gone now, "You gonna stand here in the strada yelling at me all night?"
Angel looks at him, "Did you say strada?"
Spike tells him, "It means street."
Angel knows what it means.
Spike looks at Angel's watch, "Look, we only have 12 hours to get that head back before Los Angeles becomes a demon war zone. Should we argue some more or should we get on with it?"
Angel concedes Spike is right, "No more screwing around. We find that guy. We get the head back and then we get the hell outta here. That's it."
Angel and Spike are back at the bar, asking the bartender if she's seen the blond girl. They say she was just there with the Immortal, they want to know if they're still there or if they've left.
The woman tells them they've left. She suggests they relax and offers to pour some wine.
They walk away from the bar. Angel rants, "He's got her, Spike. He's got Buffy. Why is this always happening to us?"
Spike notes it's the Immortal, it's what he does."Every time he shows up I either lose my girl, get beaten by an angry mob or get thrown in prison for tax evasion."
Angel shoots him a look.
Spike says it's a long story.
Angel points out it's different now, they're different.
Spike agrees, "Hey, damn right we are. We're not gonna be his shemps anymore."
Angel reckons they're just out of their element there.
Spike is sure if they had him in Los Angeles, they'd have him "hog-tied by now."
Angel agrees with that, "If we had our resources, if we had our team, if we had our helicopters or -- He'd be in a world of --"
Spike gets an idea, "Hang on. Doesn't Wolfram and Hart have an office here in Rome?"
Angel and Spike exit the elevator into the upper floor lobby of the W&H Rome office which looks exactly like the L.A. office. They're greeted by an attractive young woman with long, dark hair and an ample bosom which is on full display in the form fitting, low cut, sleeveless dress she's wearing.
She greets Spike, kisses him on both cheeks, and gushes about how handsome he is.
She turns to Angel and gives him the same kiss greeting, "And you, what an honor. The great Angelus."
Angel corrects her, "Actually, it's just Angel."
She accepts the correction, "Ah yes, of course. The gypsies, they gave you your soul. The gypsies are filthy people." She turns her head to the side and spits, "And we shall speak of them no more." She introduces herself, "Ilona Costa Bianchi" and offers the resources of the Italian branch for their needs. "Whatever it is that you want, we give to you. If you want the world, we give you the world. We give you two worlds, in fact, because this is our way." She laughs.
The guys think this sounds good.
She invites them to her office to discuss matters as she walks ahead, shouting to her male assistant who joins her in the office.
Spike and Angel lag behind. Spike notes, "She seems nice." They head for the office.
Wes and Illyria/Fred arrive at the lab with the Burkles. Roger is walking with his arm around Illyria/Fred, Wes is following with Trish. Roger is amazed everyone has been so nice to them.
Ilyria/Fred smiles, "They kinda have to be, daddy. I'm their boss. If they're mean to you, I'll just fire 'em."
Wes glares at her as Trish recalls the last time they saw each other, when she mowed down the bug demon with the bus. ("Fredless") She asks how it's possible it's been so long.
Wes says things have been busy.
Trish wants to catch up on everything, "Have you got a young lady in your life?"
Illyria/Fred is embarrassed, "Mom!"
Trish notes she was just asking, "Can I help it if there's a perfect gentleman hiding in plain sight of my single daughter?"
Illyria/Fred asks her dad to make Trish quit.
Roger tells his wife, "Knock it off, big mouth."
She teases Wes, if her husband keeps talking to her that way, she'll keep Wes for herself.
Roger asks if the entire lab is Fred's.
She says it belongs to the company, actually, but she's in charge of it. She asks if they want to see her office.
Roger and Trish head up the steps to the office.
Wes grabs Illyria, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
She maintains the Fred persona, "Visiting with my folks."
Wes touches her arm, "Illyria --"
She pulls her arm away and drops the Fred voice, "Your grief hangs off of you like rotted flesh. I couldn't tolerate it from them as well. I thought this would be more convenient."
Wes looks at her, "How is it possible?"
She answers, "It's a simple modulation of my form. I appear as I choose. Do you wish me to stop?"
Trish Burkle returns to the office doorway above the lab before Wes has a chance to answer. Trish notes the austere office space, suggesting Fred needs to do better decorating.
Wes and Illyria/Fred glare at each other.
Trish wonders if everything is okay.
Wes nearly chokes on the words, "Everything is fine."
Illyria/Fred returns to the Fred persona as she turns to face Trish with a smile, "Absotively."
In Ilona's office, her assistant lights her cigarette. She invites Spike and Angel to make themselves at home, "Your problems, they are no more. What are your problems?"
Angel tells her their friend is under a spell.
Spike adds, "Cast by the vilest wretch this side of Mount Everest. Which ... I am told .. he has climbed ... several times." His voice trails off to barely audible.
Angel tells Ilona he goes by the name of the Immortal.
Ilona is familiar with him, "Ah, the Immortal. Ah, then your friend is lucky." She chuckles, "I have had dealings with the Immortal many times and I must say that the outcome is always ... most satisfactory."
Spike says he has their friend trapped.
Angel is sure it's a love spell.
Ilona insists the Immortal doesn't use them, "He considers them dirty. Dirty tricks for dirty people. Like gypsies." She turns her head to the side and spits. "We will speak of them no more."
Spike insists the Immortal has done something "magic" to her.
Angel reckons they need to do some research, "Look, don't you guys have, like, an Italian Wesley here?"
Ilona answers, "Yes, yes, we have but he's taking a nap. I do not need him to tell me what is already widely known, that the Immortal does not use magic."
Spike figures it's something else then.
Angel tells her they need to know whatever there is to know about him, "We need --"
Ilona interrupts, "To keep your head. Yes, we know all about your mission to retrieve the Capo di Famiglia. And I have to say right now it seems a bit more important than trying to pry your friend off of the Immortal. Your head is in grave danger." She walks over to the desk and takes a piece of paper handed to her by her assistant. "We've already received a ransom note." She unfolds it as she walks back toward the guys. "It was addressed to you via our offices. I took the liberty of sneaking a peek." She hands the sheet of paper to Angel who shoots her an irritated look before perusing the paper. She continues, "We must hurry because the drop is about to take place in less than one hour."
Angel lists what they need, "We'll need a chase helicopter, an assault team ..."
Spike adds, "And guns, lots and lots of guns."
Ilona is appalled, "No! No! No! No! No!" She touches both their faces, "The two of you are so precious but no. This is a civilized country. We do these things all the time. Somebody gets kidnapped. Somebody pays the money. Everybody goes home happy. Grazie. Prego. Kiss, kiss. We already have the money ready to go."
Her assistant opens a briefcase, revealing it's full of cash.
Angel reluctantly agrees, "All right, fine, whatever. We'll do it your way."
Spike asks, "Who's making the drop?"
Angel and Spike are standing near a fountain in the middle of a plaza. Spike is carrying the briefcase containing the cash for the ransom of the head. Angel notes, "I helped save the world, you know."
Spike counters, "Like I haven't."
Angel persists, "Yeah, but I've done it a lot more."
Spike doesn't want to hear it, "Oh, please."
Angel keeps going, "I closed the Hellmouth."
Spike counters, "Done that."
Angel scoffs, "Yeah, you wore a necklace. You know, I helped kill the Mayor and, uh, and Jasmine and --"
Spike wonders, "Do those really count as savin' the world?"
Angel says, "I stopped Acathla That saved the world."
Spike's turn to scoff, "Buffy ran you through with a sword."
Angel counters, "Yeah, but I made her do it."
Spike looks at him, incredulous.
Angel claims, "I signaled her with my eyes."
Spike remembers it differently, "She killed you. I helped her, that one counts as mine."
Angel explains his point, "I'm better than this, okay? We're better than this. What the hell could Buffy see in him?"
The demon who stole the head gets out of a car that's been parked behind them, "Perhaps she likes the cut of his trousers."
Numerous burly human minions enter the street to back him up.
At W&H, Roger and Trish Burkle wait for the elevator. Trish apologizes for dropping in without notice.
Illyria/Fred assures her it's fine, "I'm just sad y'all can't stay longer."
Trish asks Wes to "take care of our little Fred for us, okay?"
He agrees, "Of course."
Trish embraces Illyria/Fred tightly, "I miss you already and we haven't even gone yet." She breaks the embrace and looks at her daughter, "You sure you're okay? You seem different somehow."
Roger says she's just growing up, he cautions Trish about embarrassing her in front of her employees.
Illyria/Fred embraces them both, "I love you guys so much."
The elevator doors open. Roger tells Illyria/Fred they'll talk soon.
She says she's "Countin' on it" as the Burkles get on the elevator. She smiles and waves good-bye.
As the doors close, she drops the Fred persona. Her expression hardens as she cocks her head to the side.
Wes asks coldly, "Did you get what you needed from that experience?"
She answers, "Yes, it was most informative."
Wes tells her, "Good. Don't ever do it again." He walks away.
In Rome, the demon taunts Spike and Angel. "You must be so lonely. Your girlfriend has become lovers with the Immortal. How unfortunate for you. And how fortunate for her."
Angel asks if the demon knows the Immortal.
He confirms that, "But of course."
Angel realizes, "I knew it. None of this is a coincidence."
Spike gets it, "Been his plan all along. Steal our head, keep us busy and traipse off with my girl!" Off Angel's look he amends that, "Our girl!"
Angel looks at the demon, "It's a setup. You're just his lackey."
The demon denies that, "I should be so lucky. The Immortal does not need men like me to do his business. He is a wild card. A wolf removed from the pack. A stallion without the .. uh .. bridle."
Spike wonders what this is about, "What, are you in love with him?"
The demon answers, "No. No. No. No. Well, okay, yes. But if anything, he's more of an, inspiration. A spiritual guide. Have you read his book? It's a life changer."
Angel looks over and mutters to Spike, "I'm getting a little tired of Italy."
Spike agrees. Fight ensues as they take on the minions.
The demon is unimpressed, "Oh, look. The Americans are relying on violence to solve their problems. What a surprise." He tosses the bag containing the head to the minions who throw it back and forth playing keep away with it.
The bag gets tossed back to the demon who declares, "No more games." He pulls a gun and points it at the bag, "One more step and the head gets it, hey? We are not animals. We are Italiano. You give us the money, we give you the head."
Neither Angel or Spike says anything.
The demon repeats, "The money, the head. The money --"
Angel tells him they get it. He slaps Spike in the chest, "Money."
Spike picks up the briefcase from the ground and makes the exchange with the demon for the bag.
The demon bids them farewell as he chuckles. He departs with his minions.
Spike doesn't believe the demon's denials. He's sure the Immortal is deeply involved in what's happened.
Angel figures that's true, "He's screwing us. He's screwed us before and he's screwin' us now."
Spike agrees, "Every time we hear his bleedin' name, we end up standin' in the strada, holding the bag." He unzips the bag and opens it. He and Angel peer inside, finding a digital timer counting down, 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 -1.
Angel and Spike are standing in the street, which has been heavily damaged by a blast. Small fires burn around them amongst the wreckage.
Spike is holding his shredded coat, "Civilized country? Look what that squeaker did to my jacket."
Angel is irritated, "After everything we've been through, you're pissed about a jacket."
Spike argues, "No, not a jacket. My jacket. You have no idea what I went through to get this."
Angel recalls, "You stripped it off a body of a dead Slayer."
Spike responds, "Well, which gives it great sentimental value. Besides, I've been wearin' it for over 30 years. It's like a part of me."
Angel curtly suggests, "Get over it. Buy a new one." He walks away.
Spike calls after him, "It's my second skin! It's who I am. It's just one more thing he's taken away that I'll never get back."
In Ilona's office, she helps Spike put on his new leather coat, which looks exactly like his old leather coat. Spike is happy with it.
She's glad he likes it, "I sent another ten of them to Los Angeles for you along with a fine assortment of shoes."
Angel comes into the office, looking ridiculous in a garish, red, white and blue motocross style leather jacket.
Ilona gushes, telling him he looks "gorgeous."
An uncomfortable Angel isn't sure it's really him.
Ilona disagrees, insisting it's the latest style. She asks what happened with the drop, "No grazie, prego, kiss, kiss?"
Angel answers, "Grazie, prego, kaboom."
Ilona isn't surprised, "Oh, they always do this to first timers in this country. Did I not mention that?"
Angel has had enough. He roughly unzips the jacket, "That's it. Call up the helicopters."
Spike's on board for that, "And the assault team."
Angel adds, "We're gettin' our head back."
Ilona doesn't think that's the way to handle things, "Brute force will only get your precious head smooshed." She takes each of them by the arm and escorts them to the door, "You have done such fine quality work. Now please, relax. Let us handle it from here." She nudges them out into the hall, "Sometime you have to put your faith in a higher power."
Angel tells her they don't need any higher power.
She smiles,"I'll be in touch", then shuts the doors in their faces.
Angel tells her they make their own fate. He shouts as Spike bangs on the door, "We don't need anybody cleaning up our mess. You know, we're champions!" He turns toward the lobby as he hammers on the door behind him, "Got this under control. You know we're just gonna .. we're ..." He sighs, looks at Spike, "Should we just go home?"
Spike likes that idea, "Oh God, yes. Couldn't get me out of this rat hole of a country fast enough."
Angel and Spike are back at Buffy's door. Andrew answers, wearing a robe and carrying a towel. Angel eagerly asks if she's back yet.
Andrew tells them she isn't yet but they can come in and hang out if they want, he's getting ready to go out. He notices Angel's garish coat, offering a sarcastic, "Nice jacket."
Angel sighs, "It's the latest style."
Andrew nods skeptically.
Spike asks, "Has Buffy been acting, off? Like the Immortal's got her under a spell of sorts?"
Andrew ponders that, "Interesting question." He cheerfully answers, "No", then leaves the room to get dressed.
Angel asks if maybe it's mind control.
Spike suggests perhaps it's a love potion.
Andrew answers from the other room, "Dude, seriously. I thought of all those things but Buffy fell for the Immortal on her own. And .. And now she's happy, that's it."
Angel is irritated, "But she's not finished baking yet. I gotta wait till she's done baking. You know, till she finds herself, 'cause that's the drill. Fine. I'm waitin' patiently and meanwhile, the Immortal's eatin' cookie dough!" He slumps to the chair.
Spike looks at him like he's lost his last marble.
Andrew calls out, "Spike? Is Angel crying?"
Spike answers firmly, "No." He looks at Angel who's rubbing his face and adds, "Not yet."
Andrew offers, "May want to hold the waterworks, big guy. The Immortal's cool and all but he ain't all that. He's got his flaws."
Angel gets to his feet as both he and Spike perk up at that comment.
Spike asks about the flaws.
Andrew answers, "The point is, she's moving on. You guys do the same and you might catch her one day. One of you, anyway. But you keep running in place, you're gonna find she's long gone."
Spike considers, "It is a bit silly. Us, chasing around like a coupla henpecked teenagers."
Andrew continues, "Buffy loves both of you but she's gotta live her life. People change." He steps back into the living room, his hair slicked back, attired in a tux. "You guys should try it sometime."
There's a knock on the door. Andrew opens it to two beautiful women. He greets them in Italian, kisses them and bids Spike and Angel, "Ciao".
Spike mutters, "Well, maybe it's time we --"
Angel agrees, "Yeah."
Wes is sitting in the dark in his office. Illyria opens the door, still playing Fred, "Wes?"
He closes his eyes tightly.
She enters the office and asks, "Are you, like, mad at me or something?"
He tells her, "Stop it."
She drops the Fred voice, "Isn't it what you desire?" She returns to the Fred voice as she walks toward him, "I mean, you love me. I love you. What's the big deal?"
Wes keeps his back to her, "I loved her."
Illyria returns to her own voice, "You loved this, and part of you still does. I can feel it in you. I ... wish to explore it further."
Wes gets up and turns to face her, "Never. You ... like this. It sickens me."
She plays Fred again as she steps up to him flirtatiously, "Oh, Lord. We both know that ain't true."
He demands she stop, "Change back. Be blue. Be anything. Don't be her. Don't ever be her." He walks out.
Illyria morphs back into herself, "As you wish."
In the upper floor lobby, Gunn signs some paperwork. Angel and Spike exit the elevator. Angel tells Gunn they lost the head, they need to prepare for war.
Gunn tells him the head is in his office.
Angel is surprised, "What?"
Gunn says it's on his desk and walks away.
Spike and Angel enter the office where they find the bag, a note sticking out the top of it. Angel pulls out the note, "With Regards, the Immortal." He rips the note card into pieces and tosses them. "You know, I really hate that guy!"
Spike wonders, "What's Buffy thinking? Honestly?"
Angel notes, "She doesn't exactly have the best taste in men." He looks at Spike, "Case in point."
Spike takes exception, "Hey! I think I turned out all right."
Angel agrees, "Yeah, once she got through with you."
Spike reminds him, "I wasn't the one livin' in alleys, rubbing rat filth all over my face. If we're talkin' projects, you're the Sistine Chapel."
Angel insists he wasn't a project.
Spike feels the same about himself.
Angel sits on the edge of the desk as Spike wonders, "Can't we just lock her away in a box where no one can ever touch her, you know? Like we did with Pavayne?" ("Hellbound")
Angel doesn't reckon that would work, "I don't think she'd let us. She's pretty strong."
Spike suggests a spell, some kind of mind control.
Angel thinks she'd figure that out, noting she's pretty smart.
Spike sits next to Angel on the edge of the desk, "Yeah. So, what? Live with it? Get on with our lives?"
Angel offers, "'fraid so."
Spike sighs, "Fine. No problem. I was plannin' on doin' that anyway."
Angel agrees, "Yeah, me too."
Spike claims he's doing it now, "As we speak, I'm moving on."
Angel repeats, "Movin' on."
Spike confirms, "Yeah."
Angel adds, "Right now."
Neither moves from their sitting positions on the edge of the desk.
Site design ©2000 TAO Designz
All Rights Reserved
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S5/EPISODE 20
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Written by: Drew
Goddard & Steven S.
DeKnight |
Original Air Date: May 5, 2004 |
Angel and Gunn are walking through the upper floor lobby of W&H. Gunn urges Angel to act now.
Angel isn't willing, "Not without a full risk analysis. We don't want to be rushing into this thing half-cocked."
Gunn is impatient, "As opposed to the full-cock that's been working so well for us?"
Angel stops, crosses his arms over his chest and faces Gunn, "You got something you want to say?"
Gunn answers, "Just don't want to lose another baby with the bath water, boss."
Angel suggests they send Spike.
Spike is in Angel's office, sitting in the chair with his legs thrown over the arm of it, playing a handheld video game. "Bugger that. Do it yourself."
Gunn says it's a delicate matter that has to be handled with finesse. He looks at Angel, "And why the hell are we talking to him?"
Angel answers, "Because he signed on to help."
Spike continues playing his video game as he snipes, "Not to be a glorified garbage collector."
Gunn informs him, "It's not garbage, it's a body. And there's a bloody gang war coming our way if we don't get it back."
Spike wonders if the body is that important.
Gunn fills him in, "It's the body of the Capo di Famiglia of the Goran demon clan." He explains the capo kept a low profile, he was tolerant of humans and "more interested in profit than mayhem."
Angel asks what happened to him.
Gunn answers, he died on a business trip while in Italy. They need to go to Italy, retrieve the body, and return it to his family within 26 hours.
Spike wonders, "Or what, he gets deader?"
An agitated Gunn answers, "No, he stays dead. They die, they pupate, they live again." He looks at Angel, "But only if the proper rituals are performed by the immediate family." He looks back toward Spike, "If the capo's body isn't returned in time, the rituals won't take. So long capo, hello power vacuum."
Angel reckons the rival clans will try to fill that vacuum.
Gunn confirms that, "And they aren't as tolerant of humans. If we do this, it all stays cool. If not --"
Angel knocks Spike's legs off the arm of the chair, "We'll stick with do." He tells Spike to pack his bags as he takes the video game from him and sets it on the desk.
Spike puts his leg back on the arm of the chair as he protests, "I don't even speak the language."
Angel offers, "We'll get you a book." He picks up his phone which has been ringing.
Spike looks at Gunn, "How do you say 'wank off' in Italian?"
A frustrated Gunn wonders if someone can't just get on a plane.
Angel responds to the caller on the phone, "What? When? Yeah. I understand. Thanks." He hangs up.
Spike asks, "All right, what is it this time? Ubervamps? Demon gods? Devil robots?"
Angel answers quietly, "It's Buffy."
Angel throws the doors of his office open and exits into the lobby, "I said I'll take care of it."
Spike and Gunn follow him out. Gunn wants to know what Angel intends to take care of.
Spike asks if Buffy is okay.
Angel answers, "She will be when I get there."
Spike asks what happened. When he doesn't get an answer, he asks again, "What happened?"
Angel stops near Harmony's desk, turns to Gunn and Spike, "The Immortal."
Gunn asks who.
Spike answers, "The foulest evil hell ever vomited forth."
Harm looks at him, "Worse than you?"
Angel turns back toward the elevator, "He was spotted in Rome, near Buffy's --"
Gunn notes the capo died in Rome.
Spike reckons that's something the Immortal would do.
Angel agrees, "He whacks the capo, lures me to Rome, takes out a Slayer and a vampire with a soul."
Gunn adds, "Plus he starts a war when the capo's body isn't returned for resurrection. This guy's good."
Angel directs Harm to have the corporate jet made ready. He heads for the elevator, Spike joins him. "Do you really think we can take him?"
Angel had other plans, "Whoa, whoa. What do you mean, 'we'?"
Spike reckons Angel should have known he wouldn't let him go to Italy without him.
Angel reminds him, "You don't speak the language."
Spike says he'll get a book.
The elevator doors slide open as Angel huffs, "Spike, you're only going to make things worse."
As they get on the elevator, Spike reckons it's not complicated, "We get the capo's body, we rescue Buffy, we stop the Immortal. It's that simple. Unless he kills you, which, would be sad."
Angel punches the elevator button, "He's not gonna kill me."
Spike smiles, "Not if I'm with ya."
Angel and Spike are on the W&H jet. Angel reckons Spike plans to "ride in, save the day and sweep Buffy off of her --"
Spike figures Angel is thinking the same.
Angel shoots back, "I'm already seeing somebody."
Spike scoffs, "What? Dog girl?"
Angel tells him, "Nina's a werewolf and I --" ("Unleashed")
Spike interrupts, "Fido know her boyfriend's flying halfway around the world to visit his ex?"
Angel defends himself, "Hey, look. I was gonna call her and we're just ... hanging out. She's not my girlfriend."
Spike reckons, the way things are going, she never will be.
Angel doesn't figure it's any of Spike's business.
Spike smiles, "I just wanna see you happy. Well, not too happy, 'cause then, I'd have to stake ya." He considers that a moment, "Second thought, have at it."
Angel snaps, "This isn't about us."
Spike wonders if he means him and Nina.
Angel clarifies, "Me and you. This is a dangerous mission that's only gonna get worse if we don't put aside our differences. Look, we have to work together on this to stop the Immortal and save Buffy." After a moment he adds, "Oh, and pick up that demon body thingie."
Spike looks at him, "Partners then?"
Angel agrees, "Just like old times. You want a drink?"
Spike eagerly accepts, "God, yes."
Spike and Angel are still on the jet, drinking airline food service sized bottles of booze. Angel finishes off another bottle, "Huh. Really can't get drunk off these things.
Spike agrees, "Not us anyway. Vampire constitution, not always a plus. How'd you know?"
Angel looks at the empty bottle, "Drank a lot of 'em and I still don't like you."
Spike clarifies, "About Buffy. How did you know she was in trouble?"
Angel says he got word.
Spike asks from whom.
Angel answers simply, "A source."
Spike sees through that, "You've been spying on her?"
Angel insists he just wanted to know she was okay.
Spike continues needling, "Sending your lackeys to do your stalking for you. That is really pathetic."
Angel admits he's not proud of it "but it's ... it's Buffy."
Spike asks how many people Angel has watching her.
Angels says just one, "But he got spotted, called me from the hospital when he regained consciousness."
Spike thinks he should have had more people watching her.
Angel doesn't disagree with that, "We should be landing soon. Do you remember the last time we were in Italy?"
Spike remembers, "Like it was yesterday." Flash to a black and white scene of Spike and Dru in a club sometime in the '50's. They're standing with a group of people, all repeating, "Ciao".
Angel notes he wasn't in Italy in the '50's.
Spike recalls, "Oh, right. Guess you weren't. Really missed out."
Angel notes that sounds better than the last time he remembers being there.
Spike recalls as well, "1894?"
Angel confirms that, "The room of pain."
Rome, 1894
Angelus and William are in a room, hung from the ceiling by manacles on their wrists. Angelus struggles with the manacles, trying to pull loose. He notices William is out of it and bumps against him, "William!"
He comes to, looks up at his manacled wrists and down at his half-dressed body, "That right bastard!"
Angelus is indignant as he continues trying to work loose, "The Immortal thinks he can do this to us."
William reckons the Immortal is in for a surprise, he'll curse the day he crossed their path.
They continue to jerk on the manacles binding their wrists, trying to work free.
The door opens, a man dressed in a suit enters, backed by bigger guys armed with crossbows.
Angelus makes threats, "Your master send you to do his dirty work? Ferry us to hell, then? Well, save a spot for him, next to the fire, the mangy, dung lickin' --"
The well dressed man steps forward and slaps Angelus across one cheek, then the other, with a glove.
Angelus looks at him, "A bit over the top now, aren't ya?"
The man unlocks the manacles and releases Angelus, "His benevolence, the Immortal, wishes to convey his regrets at having detained you." He releases William, "But your recent actions against his concerns merited stiff reprimand."
Angelus says the city is theirs, they were there first.
The man informs him the Immortal was there first, 300 years ago. "And now he's back. You will leave this city tonight and never return on pain of death so swift --"
Talky guy gets a lesson in swift death as Angelus snaps his neck. Angelus warns the men with the crossbows, "Go ahead, take your best shot. I'll snatch your little wee sticks out of the air and spend the next fortnight shoving 'em slowly up your arse." The men run away.
William wonders, "Can you really do that?"
Angelus answers, "The arrow thing? I don't know. Never tried." As he picks up his shirt, lamenting its condition, "Look what he did to me shirt!"
William pulls his trousers on, "His benevolence, the Immortal."
Angelus considers his plans for him as he continues getting dressed, "In for a shock, he is. There's gonna be a reckoning after a good meal and a long rest in the arms of ..."
Angelus and William arrive back at their room to find a spent Darla, lying on the bed, covered only by the bedding. Angelus calls her name.
William wonders what was done to her.
In the W&H lobby, Illyria touches one of the plants, "I can no longer hear the song of the green."
Wes and Lorne watch from a short distance away. Lorne is holding a drink and wondering if that includes him.
Wes explains, "Her powers have been greatly reduced. She still has an unusual level of strength but is no longer invulnerable or able to alter time."
Illyria has lost none of the attitude, "You revel in my defeat."
Wes asks if that's how she sees it, "You've been defeated?"
She answers, "My world gone. My power stripped. How would you define it?"
As they move toward her, Lorne offers, "Uh, I don't know. How about lucky we didn't kill you when you went nuclear?" ("Time Bomb")
She turns to them, "This fate is worse than death. Condemned to live out existence in a vessel incapable of sustaining my true glory." She turns away, "How am I to function with such limitation?"
Lorne offers his drink, "Well, have you ever tried a Sea Breeze?"
Illyria isn't amused as she steps toward him, "You attempt amusement at the expense of your better."
Wes steps up to diffuse the situation, "Illyria. Perhaps you should return to the lab."
She doesn't intend to do what she's told, "I do not bend to your wishes."
Wes says that's not what he's asking, "Merely suggesting that more tests might lead to knowledge of how to help you function."
That's phrasing she's willing to accept, "I go because it suits me." She heads up the steps.
Lorne notes it's too bad she didn't lose some of the "sass" as well.
Wes reckons she's "posturing."
Lorne wonders if he's saying, "She really wasn't gonna, like, snap my stalk?"
Wes concedes though her powers are weakened, she remains unpredictable and likely will be until she learns to adjust. "We have to be careful not to agitate her."
Lorne looks toward the elevator which opens behind Wes, "Burkles!"
Wes turns to see Fred's parents exit the elevator. Roger Burkle tells his wife he knew they'd remember them.
Wes asks rather curtly, "Why are you here?" He softens his tone, "I mean, what --"
Roger tells him they decided to take the trip to Hawaii they've been saving years for and chose a layover so they could spend some time with Fred. He asks Wes if he knows where they can find her.
Wes invites them into his office as Illyria watches from the landing above.
In Rome, Spike and Angel are outside an apartment door. Angel knocks, "Let me handle this."
Spike is sure he wants to.
Andrew opens the door and greets Spike cheerfully with a hug as Angel peers around him, into the apartment. Andrew asks what they're doing there.
Angel notes, "About to ask you the same question, Andrew."
Andrew claims Buffy and Dawn let him stay at their place because his was "incinerated when that thing happened." He blames it on a "cultural misunderstanding." He'd prefer to talk of more pleasant things. He invites them inside, "I part my threshold. I mean, my apartment, obviously."
Angel and Spike both try to enter at the same time, causing them to get stuck briefly in the doorway until Angel elbows his way through.
Andrew nervously tidies the place up, noting he had plans for later that evening but he's willing to cancel if they want to hang out. He offers to show them the city, "anywhere you want to go, anything you want to see."
Angel and Spike both answer at the same time, "Buffy."
Andrew tells them she isn't there, she went to meet "the Immortal."
Spike is concerned, "By herself?"
Andrew reminds him he did mention he had plans.
Angel asks when she left.
Andrew answers, they just missed her.
Spike reckons they're not too late.
Angel figures it could be worse.
Andrew flops down the couch, "Most nights they never leave the house, just curl up on the couch and snuggle."
Angel and Spike look at him. Angel finally asks, "They're .. snuggling?"
Andrew straightens out the couch pillow, "For starters. Wait. Uh ... You didn't know they were ... together?"
Spike reckons it just got worse.
Rome, 1894
Angelus calls to Darla as he rushes to the bed and turns her over onto her back. "What have they done, my sweet death."
Darla wakes and smiles, "Angelus, you're back."
He assures her, "I'd claw my way back from the depths of hell to lay by your side." He leans over and kisses her, then pulls back in disgust as he shoves her back. "He's tasted you."
William asks who he's talking about.
Angelus answers, "Who do you think?"
William understands who he's referring to, "Well, that cheeky bastard. Had us tossed then violates your woman."
Angelus asks Darla if the Immortal hurt her.
She smiles, "Not until I asked him to." She rolls out of bed, wrapping the comforter around herself, as she muses dreamily. "Oh, come on. Have you seen him? With the eyes and the chest and the ... immortality."
William points out a bit defensively, "We're immortal."
Darla turns her back to them, drops the comforter and pulls on a robe. "Not like him. I mean, he's not some common vampire. He's ... I don't know what he is." She turns toward them, "A giant, a titan straddling good and evil serving no master but his own considerable desires. And spiritual! Did you know he spent 150 years in a Tibetan monastery? Which I guess explains all the desire."
Angelus tells her, "He's my arch-nemisis."
Darla assures him, "Oh, darling. It was just fornication." She chuckles, "Really great fornication."
William notes she's glowing.
Angelus doesn't want to hear it, "She isn't."
Darla disagrees, "Little bit!"
William looks at Angelus, "Best fit you for a pair of antlers. Been made the right cuckold, you have."
A half-dressed Dru comes out of another room and asks dreamily, "Time for another pony ride?"
William realizes Angelus isn't the only one fit for antlers as he stares at Dru, "Son of a bitch!"
Angelus looks at Darla, "The both of ya?"
Darla smiles, "He's insatiable."
William shouts in disbelief, "Drusilla, you let him touch you?!"
Dru closes her eyes and raises her hands into the air as she slowly sways back and forth. "He felt like sunshine."
William doesn't want to hear it.
Angelus thinks this was the plan, "That's why he had us tossed, so he could violate --"
Darla tries to tell him, "He didn't --"
Angelus insists, "Violate our women!"
William points toward the women, "Violate! In succession!"
Darla corrects him, "Concurrently."
Angelus looks at Darla, "You never let us do that."
Darla suggests to Dru they take a bath, "so the boys can weep in private."
Dru asks if she'll hold her under the water.
Darla agrees, "If you wish."
They put their arms around each other and leave the room, giggling.
An angry Angelus picks up something nearby and tosses it across the room, into the wall. "This is a slight that will not go unmet."
William thinks death is too quick.
Angelus reminds him not all death is quick. He reckons it's time the Immortal discovered who he's dealing with, it's time for "blood vengeance."
Rome, 1894
Angelus and William are outside of a club, facing a guy in a tux standing outside the door. The man is holding a sheet of paper. Angelus tells him, "Blood vengeance. I'm sure we're on the list. Is there anything under blood vengeance?"
The man checks his list, noting he doesn't find anything like that listed.
William suggests he check under Angelus.
The man insists they aren't on the list.
They try to rush the door but are knocked back by an invisible barrier. The man firmly informs them, they aren't on the list, they aren't getting inside.
Angelus and William step back. Angelus complains, "He mocks us at every turn."
William recalls, "The man has no sense of indecency. You remember Frankfurt? He hatches the Rathruhn egg personally and then just decides to give those nuns safe passage."
An angry Angelus remembers, "Those were my nuns!"
William agrees, "Yeah, nuns are your thing. Everybody knows that." They both look at the guy guarding the door as Spike continues, "They respect it. They respect us."
Angelus rants, "We're the reason men fear the night." He warns an unseen Immortal it's not over, "This will never be over!"
Rome, present
Spike and Angel are in the foyer of a house where they're awaiting delivery of the capo's body, a demon stands a bit away from them. Spike laments, "It's over. Just like that." He looks at Angel, "Not that I thought I had a chance anyway."
Angel notes, "At least I have a girlfriend."
Neither can quite get over the fact it's the Immortal Buffy is with. Spike thinks she's smarter than that.
Angel thinks so too, "She'd never fall for a centuries-old guy with a dark past who may, or may not, be evil."
Spike reckons she must be under a spell.
Angel agrees, he was thinking the same thing.
They figure they'll pick up the capo's body, then find the Immortal and break the spell.
An elderly demon woman enters the foyer, carrying a bowling ball sized bag. She sets the bag on the table and thanks Angel for "tending to a delicate matter."
Angel looks at the small bag, puzzled, "Um .. this is the, uh .. Capo Di Famiglia of the Goran demon clan?"
The demon woman confirms that.
Spike looks at the bag, "Must have been a wee fella."
Angel opens the bag and peers inside, "This is just his head."
The demon woman insists that's the capo.
Spike wonders what happened to the rest of him.
She explains, "When a Goran demon becomes heavy with the age, his head sag and drop off like a ripe fig."
Angel asks if the new body hatches from the head.
She confirms that, "If the rituals are performed by the family in time." She insists he must get the head to Los Angeles right away.
Spike and Angel are back at Buffy's apartment. Andrew answers the door. Angel asks if she's returned yet.
Andrew points out it's only 8:30.
Angel asks if he knows where they went.
Wes escorts Roger and Trish Burkle into his office. They marvel at the accommodations, noting it's a step up from the Hyperion. Roger admits they were a little concerned about the "old hotel" but Fred "called it home" so they didn't say anything about it.
Trish figures, "Girl reaches a certain age, she earned the right to make her own decisions."
As they chatter on, an uncomfortable Wes tries to break the news, "Mr. and Mrs. Burkle --"
They ask him to address them by their first names, noting with all Fred has told them about her friends, they almost feel like family. Roger asks where Fred is, "Out saving the world with that nice Angel fella?"
Wes tries again to explain, "Roger, Trish. There's something you need to know." He takes a deep breath, "Fred --"
He's interrupted by Illyria imitating Fred. She enters the office looking and sounding just like Fred, "Mom?"
A shocked Wes looks toward the doorway as Illyria/Fred smiles and rushes toward the Burkles, "Dad! Oh my God! What are y'all doing here?" She offers hugs as they gush about how great she looks, how good it is to see her.
Wes looks on, stunned.
In Rome, Angel and Spike are in a crowded club. As they work their way toward the bar through the throng of dancers, Angel frets, "Dancing. Why'd it have to be dancing?"
When they reach the bar, Spike asks the bartender if she speaks English.
She confirms she does.
Angel tells her they're looking for an American girl then describes Buffy. He tells her the girl is a friend of theirs.
Spike adds she's in trouble, "This ponce, called the Immortal --"
The woman knows who they're referring to now, "Si, si. The Immortal's new ragazza. They come, while ago." She looks across the dance floor, "There."
They see the back of a blond woman, dancing. Spike tells Angel, "Hold down the fort. I'll be right back."
Angel isn't planning on staying behind. He follows Spike across the dance floor, "Oh yeah, here it comes. The part where you run off alone and play the big hero so Buffy'll take you back. Well, newsflash Blondie Bear, never gonna happen."
They stop in the middle of the dance floor to continue the discussion. Spike counters, "Look, I know I don't have a shot with her, all right? Probably never did but I still care about her and I'm not gonna let her end up with a jerk like the Immortal, or you." He moves toward Buffy.
Angel follows, "Ours is a forever love."
Spike reminds him, "I had a relationship with her, too."
Angel scoffs, "Okay, sleeping together is not a relationship."
Spike disagrees, "It is if you do it enough times."
Angel stops as he realizes something, "Spike. The head."
Spike thought Angel had it.
Angel looks back toward the bar and sees the demon who was lurking in the foyer with them earlier lifting the bag and absconding with it.
Spike shouts at the demon then appears in front of him, "Where do you think you're going with our head, Jeeves?"
Several burly guys encircle Spike and Angel as one of them answers the question, "Anywhere he wants."
Angel looks around, wondering if they couldn't discuss this over a drink.
Fight ensues in slow motion. Once the minions are dispatched, Spike punches Angel which appears to be accidental, the first time. Angel rubs his jaw then punches Spike. They both hit each other at the same time. Angel asks, "What the hell are you doing?"
Spike shouts, "I was confused, ya git! It's very loud in here!"
Angel looks around the club for the demon, "Where'd the little guy go?"
They look toward the door and see the demon make his exit. They follow.
They rush into the street outside the club and are nearly run down by a speeding red convertible. Angel recognizes it, "Hey! That's our car!"
Spike jumps on a Vespa scooter parked nearby, revs the engine and pulls it up next to Angel. "Hop on, little mama."
Angel insists he's not riding on the back.
Spike points out, "He's getting away!"
Angel reluctantly climbs on the back of the Vespa and wraps his arms around Spike. Spike takes off in pursuit of the convertible.
Tires screech as the convertible weaves through the streets, around tight corners. Quite a bit behind, the boys follow on the scooter.
Angel urges Spike to speed it up.
Spike tells him to stop holding on so tight.
The pursuit continues. They manage to gain ground when the convertible is sidetracked by a pedestrian in the road. Angel directs Spike to turn right, take a shortcut. As Angel continues giving directions, they find themselves facing the convertible's headlights. The car rams the scooter, knocking the boys off of it and then is driven off.
Angel is frustrated, "One job, you know? Hang onto the head. That's it."
Spike reminds Angel he was there too.
Angel points out he wasn't in charge of the head.
Spike doesn't reckon it matters, it's gone now, "You gonna stand here in the strada yelling at me all night?"
Angel looks at him, "Did you say strada?"
Spike tells him, "It means street."
Angel knows what it means.
Spike looks at Angel's watch, "Look, we only have 12 hours to get that head back before Los Angeles becomes a demon war zone. Should we argue some more or should we get on with it?"
Angel concedes Spike is right, "No more screwing around. We find that guy. We get the head back and then we get the hell outta here. That's it."
Angel and Spike are back at the bar, asking the bartender if she's seen the blond girl. They say she was just there with the Immortal, they want to know if they're still there or if they've left.
The woman tells them they've left. She suggests they relax and offers to pour some wine.
They walk away from the bar. Angel rants, "He's got her, Spike. He's got Buffy. Why is this always happening to us?"
Spike notes it's the Immortal, it's what he does."Every time he shows up I either lose my girl, get beaten by an angry mob or get thrown in prison for tax evasion."
Angel shoots him a look.
Spike says it's a long story.
Angel points out it's different now, they're different.
Spike agrees, "Hey, damn right we are. We're not gonna be his shemps anymore."
Angel reckons they're just out of their element there.
Spike is sure if they had him in Los Angeles, they'd have him "hog-tied by now."
Angel agrees with that, "If we had our resources, if we had our team, if we had our helicopters or -- He'd be in a world of --"
Spike gets an idea, "Hang on. Doesn't Wolfram and Hart have an office here in Rome?"
Angel and Spike exit the elevator into the upper floor lobby of the W&H Rome office which looks exactly like the L.A. office. They're greeted by an attractive young woman with long, dark hair and an ample bosom which is on full display in the form fitting, low cut, sleeveless dress she's wearing.
She greets Spike, kisses him on both cheeks, and gushes about how handsome he is.
She turns to Angel and gives him the same kiss greeting, "And you, what an honor. The great Angelus."
Angel corrects her, "Actually, it's just Angel."
She accepts the correction, "Ah yes, of course. The gypsies, they gave you your soul. The gypsies are filthy people." She turns her head to the side and spits, "And we shall speak of them no more." She introduces herself, "Ilona Costa Bianchi" and offers the resources of the Italian branch for their needs. "Whatever it is that you want, we give to you. If you want the world, we give you the world. We give you two worlds, in fact, because this is our way." She laughs.
The guys think this sounds good.
She invites them to her office to discuss matters as she walks ahead, shouting to her male assistant who joins her in the office.
Spike and Angel lag behind. Spike notes, "She seems nice." They head for the office.
Wes and Illyria/Fred arrive at the lab with the Burkles. Roger is walking with his arm around Illyria/Fred, Wes is following with Trish. Roger is amazed everyone has been so nice to them.
Ilyria/Fred smiles, "They kinda have to be, daddy. I'm their boss. If they're mean to you, I'll just fire 'em."
Wes glares at her as Trish recalls the last time they saw each other, when she mowed down the bug demon with the bus. ("Fredless") She asks how it's possible it's been so long.
Wes says things have been busy.
Trish wants to catch up on everything, "Have you got a young lady in your life?"
Illyria/Fred is embarrassed, "Mom!"
Trish notes she was just asking, "Can I help it if there's a perfect gentleman hiding in plain sight of my single daughter?"
Illyria/Fred asks her dad to make Trish quit.
Roger tells his wife, "Knock it off, big mouth."
She teases Wes, if her husband keeps talking to her that way, she'll keep Wes for herself.
Roger asks if the entire lab is Fred's.
She says it belongs to the company, actually, but she's in charge of it. She asks if they want to see her office.
Roger and Trish head up the steps to the office.
Wes grabs Illyria, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
She maintains the Fred persona, "Visiting with my folks."
Wes touches her arm, "Illyria --"
She pulls her arm away and drops the Fred voice, "Your grief hangs off of you like rotted flesh. I couldn't tolerate it from them as well. I thought this would be more convenient."
Wes looks at her, "How is it possible?"
She answers, "It's a simple modulation of my form. I appear as I choose. Do you wish me to stop?"
Trish Burkle returns to the office doorway above the lab before Wes has a chance to answer. Trish notes the austere office space, suggesting Fred needs to do better decorating.
Wes and Illyria/Fred glare at each other.
Trish wonders if everything is okay.
Wes nearly chokes on the words, "Everything is fine."
Illyria/Fred returns to the Fred persona as she turns to face Trish with a smile, "Absotively."
In Ilona's office, her assistant lights her cigarette. She invites Spike and Angel to make themselves at home, "Your problems, they are no more. What are your problems?"
Angel tells her their friend is under a spell.
Spike adds, "Cast by the vilest wretch this side of Mount Everest. Which ... I am told .. he has climbed ... several times." His voice trails off to barely audible.
Angel tells Ilona he goes by the name of the Immortal.
Ilona is familiar with him, "Ah, the Immortal. Ah, then your friend is lucky." She chuckles, "I have had dealings with the Immortal many times and I must say that the outcome is always ... most satisfactory."
Spike says he has their friend trapped.
Angel is sure it's a love spell.
Ilona insists the Immortal doesn't use them, "He considers them dirty. Dirty tricks for dirty people. Like gypsies." She turns her head to the side and spits. "We will speak of them no more."
Spike insists the Immortal has done something "magic" to her.
Angel reckons they need to do some research, "Look, don't you guys have, like, an Italian Wesley here?"
Ilona answers, "Yes, yes, we have but he's taking a nap. I do not need him to tell me what is already widely known, that the Immortal does not use magic."
Spike figures it's something else then.
Angel tells her they need to know whatever there is to know about him, "We need --"
Ilona interrupts, "To keep your head. Yes, we know all about your mission to retrieve the Capo di Famiglia. And I have to say right now it seems a bit more important than trying to pry your friend off of the Immortal. Your head is in grave danger." She walks over to the desk and takes a piece of paper handed to her by her assistant. "We've already received a ransom note." She unfolds it as she walks back toward the guys. "It was addressed to you via our offices. I took the liberty of sneaking a peek." She hands the sheet of paper to Angel who shoots her an irritated look before perusing the paper. She continues, "We must hurry because the drop is about to take place in less than one hour."
Angel lists what they need, "We'll need a chase helicopter, an assault team ..."
Spike adds, "And guns, lots and lots of guns."
Ilona is appalled, "No! No! No! No! No!" She touches both their faces, "The two of you are so precious but no. This is a civilized country. We do these things all the time. Somebody gets kidnapped. Somebody pays the money. Everybody goes home happy. Grazie. Prego. Kiss, kiss. We already have the money ready to go."
Her assistant opens a briefcase, revealing it's full of cash.
Angel reluctantly agrees, "All right, fine, whatever. We'll do it your way."
Spike asks, "Who's making the drop?"
Angel and Spike are standing near a fountain in the middle of a plaza. Spike is carrying the briefcase containing the cash for the ransom of the head. Angel notes, "I helped save the world, you know."
Spike counters, "Like I haven't."
Angel persists, "Yeah, but I've done it a lot more."
Spike doesn't want to hear it, "Oh, please."
Angel keeps going, "I closed the Hellmouth."
Spike counters, "Done that."
Angel scoffs, "Yeah, you wore a necklace. You know, I helped kill the Mayor and, uh, and Jasmine and --"
Spike wonders, "Do those really count as savin' the world?"
Angel says, "I stopped Acathla That saved the world."
Spike's turn to scoff, "Buffy ran you through with a sword."
Angel counters, "Yeah, but I made her do it."
Spike looks at him, incredulous.
Angel claims, "I signaled her with my eyes."
Spike remembers it differently, "She killed you. I helped her, that one counts as mine."
Angel explains his point, "I'm better than this, okay? We're better than this. What the hell could Buffy see in him?"
The demon who stole the head gets out of a car that's been parked behind them, "Perhaps she likes the cut of his trousers."
Numerous burly human minions enter the street to back him up.
At W&H, Roger and Trish Burkle wait for the elevator. Trish apologizes for dropping in without notice.
Illyria/Fred assures her it's fine, "I'm just sad y'all can't stay longer."
Trish asks Wes to "take care of our little Fred for us, okay?"
He agrees, "Of course."
Trish embraces Illyria/Fred tightly, "I miss you already and we haven't even gone yet." She breaks the embrace and looks at her daughter, "You sure you're okay? You seem different somehow."
Roger says she's just growing up, he cautions Trish about embarrassing her in front of her employees.
Illyria/Fred embraces them both, "I love you guys so much."
The elevator doors open. Roger tells Illyria/Fred they'll talk soon.
She says she's "Countin' on it" as the Burkles get on the elevator. She smiles and waves good-bye.
As the doors close, she drops the Fred persona. Her expression hardens as she cocks her head to the side.
Wes asks coldly, "Did you get what you needed from that experience?"
She answers, "Yes, it was most informative."
Wes tells her, "Good. Don't ever do it again." He walks away.
In Rome, the demon taunts Spike and Angel. "You must be so lonely. Your girlfriend has become lovers with the Immortal. How unfortunate for you. And how fortunate for her."
Angel asks if the demon knows the Immortal.
He confirms that, "But of course."
Angel realizes, "I knew it. None of this is a coincidence."
Spike gets it, "Been his plan all along. Steal our head, keep us busy and traipse off with my girl!" Off Angel's look he amends that, "Our girl!"
Angel looks at the demon, "It's a setup. You're just his lackey."
The demon denies that, "I should be so lucky. The Immortal does not need men like me to do his business. He is a wild card. A wolf removed from the pack. A stallion without the .. uh .. bridle."
Spike wonders what this is about, "What, are you in love with him?"
The demon answers, "No. No. No. No. Well, okay, yes. But if anything, he's more of an, inspiration. A spiritual guide. Have you read his book? It's a life changer."
Angel looks over and mutters to Spike, "I'm getting a little tired of Italy."
Spike agrees. Fight ensues as they take on the minions.
The demon is unimpressed, "Oh, look. The Americans are relying on violence to solve their problems. What a surprise." He tosses the bag containing the head to the minions who throw it back and forth playing keep away with it.
The bag gets tossed back to the demon who declares, "No more games." He pulls a gun and points it at the bag, "One more step and the head gets it, hey? We are not animals. We are Italiano. You give us the money, we give you the head."
Neither Angel or Spike says anything.
The demon repeats, "The money, the head. The money --"
Angel tells him they get it. He slaps Spike in the chest, "Money."
Spike picks up the briefcase from the ground and makes the exchange with the demon for the bag.
The demon bids them farewell as he chuckles. He departs with his minions.
Spike doesn't believe the demon's denials. He's sure the Immortal is deeply involved in what's happened.
Angel figures that's true, "He's screwing us. He's screwed us before and he's screwin' us now."
Spike agrees, "Every time we hear his bleedin' name, we end up standin' in the strada, holding the bag." He unzips the bag and opens it. He and Angel peer inside, finding a digital timer counting down, 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 -1.
Angel and Spike are standing in the street, which has been heavily damaged by a blast. Small fires burn around them amongst the wreckage.
Spike is holding his shredded coat, "Civilized country? Look what that squeaker did to my jacket."
Angel is irritated, "After everything we've been through, you're pissed about a jacket."
Spike argues, "No, not a jacket. My jacket. You have no idea what I went through to get this."
Angel recalls, "You stripped it off a body of a dead Slayer."
Spike responds, "Well, which gives it great sentimental value. Besides, I've been wearin' it for over 30 years. It's like a part of me."
Angel curtly suggests, "Get over it. Buy a new one." He walks away.
Spike calls after him, "It's my second skin! It's who I am. It's just one more thing he's taken away that I'll never get back."
In Ilona's office, she helps Spike put on his new leather coat, which looks exactly like his old leather coat. Spike is happy with it.
She's glad he likes it, "I sent another ten of them to Los Angeles for you along with a fine assortment of shoes."
Angel comes into the office, looking ridiculous in a garish, red, white and blue motocross style leather jacket.
Ilona gushes, telling him he looks "gorgeous."
An uncomfortable Angel isn't sure it's really him.
Ilona disagrees, insisting it's the latest style. She asks what happened with the drop, "No grazie, prego, kiss, kiss?"
Angel answers, "Grazie, prego, kaboom."
Ilona isn't surprised, "Oh, they always do this to first timers in this country. Did I not mention that?"
Angel has had enough. He roughly unzips the jacket, "That's it. Call up the helicopters."
Spike's on board for that, "And the assault team."
Angel adds, "We're gettin' our head back."
Ilona doesn't think that's the way to handle things, "Brute force will only get your precious head smooshed." She takes each of them by the arm and escorts them to the door, "You have done such fine quality work. Now please, relax. Let us handle it from here." She nudges them out into the hall, "Sometime you have to put your faith in a higher power."
Angel tells her they don't need any higher power.
She smiles,"I'll be in touch", then shuts the doors in their faces.
Angel tells her they make their own fate. He shouts as Spike bangs on the door, "We don't need anybody cleaning up our mess. You know, we're champions!" He turns toward the lobby as he hammers on the door behind him, "Got this under control. You know we're just gonna .. we're ..." He sighs, looks at Spike, "Should we just go home?"
Spike likes that idea, "Oh God, yes. Couldn't get me out of this rat hole of a country fast enough."
Angel and Spike are back at Buffy's door. Andrew answers, wearing a robe and carrying a towel. Angel eagerly asks if she's back yet.
Andrew tells them she isn't yet but they can come in and hang out if they want, he's getting ready to go out. He notices Angel's garish coat, offering a sarcastic, "Nice jacket."
Angel sighs, "It's the latest style."
Andrew nods skeptically.
Spike asks, "Has Buffy been acting, off? Like the Immortal's got her under a spell of sorts?"
Andrew ponders that, "Interesting question." He cheerfully answers, "No", then leaves the room to get dressed.
Angel asks if maybe it's mind control.
Spike suggests perhaps it's a love potion.
Andrew answers from the other room, "Dude, seriously. I thought of all those things but Buffy fell for the Immortal on her own. And .. And now she's happy, that's it."
Angel is irritated, "But she's not finished baking yet. I gotta wait till she's done baking. You know, till she finds herself, 'cause that's the drill. Fine. I'm waitin' patiently and meanwhile, the Immortal's eatin' cookie dough!" He slumps to the chair.
Spike looks at him like he's lost his last marble.
Andrew calls out, "Spike? Is Angel crying?"
Spike answers firmly, "No." He looks at Angel who's rubbing his face and adds, "Not yet."
Andrew offers, "May want to hold the waterworks, big guy. The Immortal's cool and all but he ain't all that. He's got his flaws."
Angel gets to his feet as both he and Spike perk up at that comment.
Spike asks about the flaws.
Andrew answers, "The point is, she's moving on. You guys do the same and you might catch her one day. One of you, anyway. But you keep running in place, you're gonna find she's long gone."
Spike considers, "It is a bit silly. Us, chasing around like a coupla henpecked teenagers."
Andrew continues, "Buffy loves both of you but she's gotta live her life. People change." He steps back into the living room, his hair slicked back, attired in a tux. "You guys should try it sometime."
There's a knock on the door. Andrew opens it to two beautiful women. He greets them in Italian, kisses them and bids Spike and Angel, "Ciao".
Spike mutters, "Well, maybe it's time we --"
Angel agrees, "Yeah."
Wes is sitting in the dark in his office. Illyria opens the door, still playing Fred, "Wes?"
He closes his eyes tightly.
She enters the office and asks, "Are you, like, mad at me or something?"
He tells her, "Stop it."
She drops the Fred voice, "Isn't it what you desire?" She returns to the Fred voice as she walks toward him, "I mean, you love me. I love you. What's the big deal?"
Wes keeps his back to her, "I loved her."
Illyria returns to her own voice, "You loved this, and part of you still does. I can feel it in you. I ... wish to explore it further."
Wes gets up and turns to face her, "Never. You ... like this. It sickens me."
She plays Fred again as she steps up to him flirtatiously, "Oh, Lord. We both know that ain't true."
He demands she stop, "Change back. Be blue. Be anything. Don't be her. Don't ever be her." He walks out.
Illyria morphs back into herself, "As you wish."
In the upper floor lobby, Gunn signs some paperwork. Angel and Spike exit the elevator. Angel tells Gunn they lost the head, they need to prepare for war.
Gunn tells him the head is in his office.
Angel is surprised, "What?"
Gunn says it's on his desk and walks away.
Spike and Angel enter the office where they find the bag, a note sticking out the top of it. Angel pulls out the note, "With Regards, the Immortal." He rips the note card into pieces and tosses them. "You know, I really hate that guy!"
Spike wonders, "What's Buffy thinking? Honestly?"
Angel notes, "She doesn't exactly have the best taste in men." He looks at Spike, "Case in point."
Spike takes exception, "Hey! I think I turned out all right."
Angel agrees, "Yeah, once she got through with you."
Spike reminds him, "I wasn't the one livin' in alleys, rubbing rat filth all over my face. If we're talkin' projects, you're the Sistine Chapel."
Angel insists he wasn't a project.
Spike feels the same about himself.
Angel sits on the edge of the desk as Spike wonders, "Can't we just lock her away in a box where no one can ever touch her, you know? Like we did with Pavayne?" ("Hellbound")
Angel doesn't reckon that would work, "I don't think she'd let us. She's pretty strong."
Spike suggests a spell, some kind of mind control.
Angel thinks she'd figure that out, noting she's pretty smart.
Spike sits next to Angel on the edge of the desk, "Yeah. So, what? Live with it? Get on with our lives?"
Angel offers, "'fraid so."
Spike sighs, "Fine. No problem. I was plannin' on doin' that anyway."
Angel agrees, "Yeah, me too."
Spike claims he's doing it now, "As we speak, I'm moving on."
Angel repeats, "Movin' on."
Spike confirms, "Yeah."
Angel adds, "Right now."
Neither moves from their sitting positions on the edge of the desk.
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