CHAPTER 5
“What’s wrong, love?” A voice spoke softly from the darkness. He had watched her for a few moments, knowing he should leave her in peace, not intrude, however her palpable sadness was too much for him. He couldn’t bear to see her in pain of any sort without trying somehow to fix it.
“Nothing, Spike. It doesn’t matter.” Buffy dashed away the tears and drew a deep breath to calm herself. How long had he been there? How long had he been watching her cry like a baby?
She turned to him as he stepped out of the shadows and into the moonlight, concern etched on his expressive face. What was it with her and vampires? She was the Slayer, so a certain amount of contact with vampires was to be expected, contact of the dusty kind, that is. However these two vampires, one with a soul—her boyfriend, well maybe, the jury was still out on that! And this other one, the one without a soul, the one who until only a few short months ago was her mortal enemy and now he was what? A friend? A confidant? A fighting companion? All she knew was there was an easy companionship to the way Spike fell into step next to her. To her left, as always; allowing the greatest benefit if they were attacked, he being left handed and she right they could cover a complete 360 degrees. They had fought together so many times now, it felt natural, both knowing the other’s capabilities and as such each able was to get on with their own job without the distraction of worrying about the other. There was fluidity to the way they fought, like two dancers in a complex ballet each knowing their own part and knowing that their partner would be there to catch them when the music dictated.
“Got somethin’ planned for tonight, pet?” he enquired with a slight tilt of his head. She looked gorgeous, surely she was not this dressed up for a night’s slaying? He knew she always looked good on patrol, that was a huge part of the Slayer image. But this was a little more dressy than normal, and she looked adorable. He ached to wrap her in his arms and let her know just how beautiful she was.
“Hmmm?” She broke out of her deliberation and looked at him. “No, not really. Just wandering, I guess. See what shows up.”
“Somethin I’d like to show you, Slayer. Back in my crypt.”
He seemed a little on edge tonight, what was with that? Spike could be a bundle of energy, like a small explosion sometimes, but he was never edgy or nervous. “Your crypt, huh? Not sure that is an overly wise place for me to be? You know, into the den and all that.”
He moved in a blur of motion, full vampire speed, his arm banded around her and as he pulled her back into his chest his mouth descended to her neck. “If I wanted you dead Slayer, you’d be dead,” he murmured and planted a soft kiss on her neck to prove his point before letting go. She spun, fury burning in her eyes, only to be confronted with his easy smiling face, no smirk, no sadistic satisfaction, just laughing blue eyes and a tender smile. He dipped his head. “Sorry, love. Just wanted to prove my point. No harm meant. Though you know I shouldn’t have been able to do that, right? You’re off your game tonight, pet. Mustn’t be allowed to happen.” His eyes were laughing no longer; instead they had darkened with worry.
“I could so have taken you then, Spike.” She glared at him, daring him to disagree.
“Course you could, kitten,” he agreed, his voice only slightly disbelieving. “So, you gonna come see or not?” His question was only a little less than a challenge.
“Ok, I guess” she agreed with a sigh. What harm could it do? Whatever it was that this enigma of a vampire wanted to show her, her night couldn’t get any worse, could it?
They walked together across the graveyard towards Spike’s crypt, it was a quiet night and the moon shone almost full out of a clear, bright sky. The vampire shone in the moonlight silver-blonde hair, pale skin and black leather equally as vivid in the brightness of the night. She glanced sideways at him; he is so graceful she noticed not for the first time, like a cat. Not your domestic kitty, but a big cat, a panther or a lynx; lithe, predatory and deadly.
He is so different to Angel, she thought. Where the dark haired vampire was strong and powerful in an imposing kind of way, Spike’s was a lean strength, sleek and sinewy; definitely graceful she thought again. If Spike was a cat, Angel was a bear; muscular, ominous and commanding. Angel had a presence that dwarfed most of those around him. He took charge, was always first into the fray. When they fought together he protected her, he took the strongest and the best opponent for himself and kept an eye on her the whole time they fought in case she needed assistance. Angel made her feel safe. Spike made her feel… what? Powerful? Competent?
Without thought Spike opened the door to the crypt and held it open for her to enter; she didn’t question this, thought little of it in fact. It was just Spike, most probably a left over from his human days when men were expected to be gentlemen. If she allowed herself to think about it she would have found it amusing really, the way he would open doors or allow her to precede him through a gate; gentlemanly manners. Yet he had no hesitation at all about punching her in the face when they sparred, he swore unabashedly in front of her and on more than a few occasions she had noticed his eyes roaming freely and appreciatively over her body. It was just one more example of the contradiction that was Spike.
Inside the crypt candles burned; dozens of them of differing sizes and shapes. “Get you anything, Slayer?” he enquired, not that he had a lot to offer but he did keep some small bottles of coke in the fridge for those times he actually felt like mixing his alcohol with something. Not that those times were a regular occurrence, hence the coke was mostly unopened. He removed one now offering it to her. Buffy took it with a mumbled “thanks”.
“Umm, make yourself at home,” he offered. “Be right back.” He headed down the ladder to the lower level as Buffy looked around the upper level, her coke remaining unopened in her hand. It was not at all what she had expected, towards the back, past the sarcophagus’ a tv stood in one corner with a couple of slightly tatty black leather armchairs positioned in front of it on a red Persian style rug. The small fridge from which Spike had taken her drink sat in the left corner. Window sills and wall niches housed the candles. She lent against a sarcophagus and watched as a blonde head re-emerged through the hole leading to the lower level of the crypt.
Spike reappeared holding a brown-paper wrapped package. He started towards her apprehension written all over him, from the trepidation on his face to his hesitant almost jerky movement.
“I know it’s still a few days away; but figured you’d be doin’ things with your family or your pals on the day. So I wanted to give this to you tonight,” he murmured, his eyes downcast, his body language screaming his urge to flee as he handed the package to Buffy.
“Spike? Wha… you got me a birthday present?” Buffy was stunned. She removed the paper wrapping to reveal a black scabbard and harness, a black leather handle protruded from the scabbard, she drew it to reveal the most beautiful sword she had ever seen. It was only two and a half foot long, with a string of runes running down the centre, it was simplistic in design yet at the same time it was stunning. It dazzled in the candlelight. She wielded it and found its balance and weight perfect. The warrior in her revelled in its exquisite beauty; it was hers, this she knew, her hand and arm told her that, no one would wield this weapon as well as she.
She looked up, her eyes filling with tears for the second time that night, unlike the last ones these were tears of happiness and delight. “Spike, you shouldn’t have. This, it’s too much. I mean, it is beautiful, and I love it, but too much. It must have cost a fortune. I can’t… can’t accept it, Spike. You shouldn’t spend your...”
“Buffy,” Spike cut her off. “It’s not too much. I want you to have it… as long as you like it, that is? I had it made for you, for your height and fighting style. Know a guy, demon, best swordsmith there is. He owed me a couple of favours so I called them in, that’s all. Found a picture in a book, just like this one only 6ft long, big medieval thing, had him copy it but with you in mind. Harness sits on your back so you can reach behind and draw it, that way it doesn’t get in your way when you’re fighting.” His eyes sought hers out imploringly. “Do you like it, love? I mean you don’t have to say you do if you don’t.”
She wondered how could someone so incredibly powerful, and generally confident to the point of cockiness be suddenly so insecure and vulnerable? Vulnerable. Now there’s a word she never thought she would use in conjunction with Spike! She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. His eyes widened with shock. “I love it, Spike,” she assured him. “It’s the most beautiful thing anyone has ever given me.” Stepping back and releasing the vampire she slipped into the harness, practicing drawing the sword. She knew she had never held a finer weapon before. The runes caught her eye. “What do these mean Spike?” she enquired.
“Don’t know, pet. They were on the original, so I guess he just copied them. Look right nice, though.”
A short while later the two unlikely companions left the crypt and headed back out into the quiet of the night. “Walk with me a while?” Buffy asked. In answer Spike simply fell into step next to her. They walked together in silence, not the awkward silence of not having anything to say, but the quiet comfort of two people who didn’t need to say anything.
When they reached her house he stopped and looked at her. “Well, better get goin then, love.”
She reached out a hand to stroke his face, kissing his cheek again before breathing, “Thank you, Spike, I really, really do love my present.” She turned and made her way up to her bedroom window. Lighting up a cigarette and smiling happily to himself the vampire headed back to the graveyard and home.
From behind a tree in the neighbour’s front yard a shadow moved, a scowl darkening already dark features. He watched as the blonde vampire disappeared in the distance then turned his attention back to the window the girl had vanished through. With an agility his bulk belied he spun and stormed off in the opposite direction to the blonde.
Chapter 6
“Are you stupid?” he growled at her as he emerged from the shadows the following night.
She bristled, well this was a nice…. ‘hello, sorry about last night, I was a moron, and I won’t do it again’ … from her supposedly loving boyfriend. “I don’t know, Angel, why don’t you tell me. It seems to be what you are good at lately!” Daggers flew from her eyes. “Look, is there gonna be a point here sometime soon? Cause you know, work to do, vampires to dust,” she looked at him pointedly as she spoke. Now where did that come from, she wondered. She wouldn’t dust Angel. She knew that, she loved him... didn’t she? It was just that lately he was being so insufferable and he just made her so mad.
“Spike is dangerous, Buffy, what don’t you understand about that? I mean the fact that he has tried to kill you several times should be enough of an indication, you’d think! Yet last night I see him walking you to your door, what’s with that? And a goodnight kiss? Want to explain that one? You think that is acceptable slayer behaviour? You are supposed to be better than that! He is a soulless murderer or had that escaped your keen notice?” The anger was rolling off him in waves, his normally dark eyes were black pits of fury.
Silence stretched between them for what felt like hours. “Well, Buffy? I’m waiting... waiting for you to explain it to me. To explain what the hell you were doing kissing Spike." With a sneer he added, "It’s a shame you didn’t remember last night that you have a job to do, isn’t it?”
“What, are you following me now? Making sure I’m a good little girl and do as you tell me, is that it?” Her fury matched his and then surpassed it. “What that was with Spike was none of your business, that’s what it was! How dare you spy on me? How dare you treat me like I am some pathetic little girl who needs you to hold my hand and keep me safe? I am The Slayer, Angel, have you forgotten what that means? I can take care of myself! And in answer to your question I am thinking that, yeah, maybe I am an idiot, for putting up with the way you treat me. The way you are always telling me how I should act and what I should do, where I can and can’t go. This can’t go on, Angel. This isn’t a relationship, a relationship is two people who care about each other and treat each other as equals—to you I will always be someone you need to protect, to control. God what do you think you are, my father or something? We are over, Angel. Just…just leave me alone, ok?”
She ran as fast as her Slayer strength would allow, not caring where she was going, just wanting to get away, as far away as possible from this man she had thought she loved, this man she thought had loved her. She realised now that all it had ever been was safety, Angel was big and strong and dangerous and he made her feel safe in this big scary life that she had never asked for, the life of the Chosen One. The more she thought about it the more she knew it had never been love for either of them, ok sure there was attraction, mutual attraction, but love…no…just a co-dependency, she wanted to feel safe and he wanted to protect the innocent, shape the Slayer to be his ideal of what she should be.
Finally she stopped running, where was she? Wow she had come a long way. She needed to talk, to cry on someone’s shoulder, to rant, to rave…Willow, she needed Willow. As she made her way through the dark streets of Sunnydale towards Willow Rosenberg’s house she reflected on the people in her life since moving here. Willow was her best friend, she could tell her anything and knew that they would always be there for each other, and Will was smart too, really smart like major book learny type smart. Then there was Xander, he was, well, Xander. He could make you laugh when there was absolutely nothing to laugh about, he was loyal and brave, though not so good on the strong and coordinated side. But there you know, even when it was hard, well impossible and it looked like there was no way they were gonna make it through, he was there and doing the best he could to help. He also had a way of seeing things that was different to everyone else, it was like he could see right to the heart of things sometimes, when everyone else was busy looking at the big picture Xander could look straight through it all to the crux of the matter.
Giles, her Watcher, he was so stuffy sometimes and very little sense of humour, although he was getting better, he even made a joke the other day, granted it wasn’t funny and really kinda lame but hey improvement! Giles was smart though, smart like Willow but in a wise way. He was also kind and caring, she loved her Watcher like the Dad who actually could be bothered with being there unlike her real one who, well, couldn’t!
She was on Willow’s street now and as she approached the house she checked for signs that anyone was awake in the Rosenberg household. All quiet, good. She made her way up to Willow’s bedroom window and tapped softly, “Will, wake up, it’s me I need to talk to you.” The girl inside the room stirred in her sleep rolling over and rubbing sleep from her eyes she focused on the window, “Buffy? What is it what’s wrong, is it an apocalypse?”
“No Will, not an apocalypse, just a need to talk”
“Come in.” Willow opened the window and beckoned Buffy inside. “What is it Buff?” she asked as they sat back on her bed leaning on copious amounts of cushions and stuffed animals.
Buffy proceeded to explain to Willow all about the fights she has been having lately with Angel and how he is constantly trying to control her, she did not, for reasons that she wasn’t entirely sure about mention the blonde vampire or his gift to her. In the months since Buffy and Spike had started their tenuous friendship she had not mentioned him to anyone, at first it was too weird, the vampire that had tried so many times to kill her suddenly saving her life, then it was just altogether too difficult to explain, her friends and her Watcher just wouldn’t have understood why or, for that matter, how she could trust him, all she knew was she did.
“So I told him it was over” she told Willow, the first trace of a sob catching in her throat. She looked beseechingly at her friend for confirmation that she had done the right thing, that she wasn’t just throwing some stupid juvenile tantrum.
“Oh Buffy, I am so sorry, but you did the right thing, really. I mean who does he think he is coming over all I’m the big man and you are just the helpless female. Just cause he’s like 400 years old or something and, yick, any way he’s old enough to be your….”
“Don’t go there Will” Buffy was smiling now, even though tears were trying to well in her eyes, she just kept dashing them away, she knew she could count on Will to make everything alright.
“Wanna stay, we can sneak downstairs and have ice cream and stay up all night talking” Willow bubbled hopefully.
“Love to Will but Mom is taking me to the Mall tomorrow to pick something out for my Birthday and I just know she will be in to wake me up EARLY so I better get home. Thankyou so much, you always make feel better!”
“Glad to be of help, just call me…that thing that you call people who make other people happy” she finished with a half smile and a shrug.
“Night Will” Buffy smiled at her friend as she climbed back out the window.
“Night Buffy, see you tomorrow night ok, have fun at the mall. And Buffy, don’t worry, you know about the ‘Angel’ stuff, I’m sure everything will work out the way it’s supposed to – you know maybe you guys just weren’t meant to be. I’m sure ‘Mr Perfect for Buffy’ is out there somewhere and you just have to wait till you find him. Does that sound all sappy and Mill’s and Boonsy cause if it does, well you know, sorry, its just that’s what I believe, that when it’s the right someone you just kinda know it” Willow flushed bright red as she looked at her friend nervously, hoping she hadn’t just made a complete fool of herself.
Buffy smiled, her own cheeks reddening with embarrassment, “Yeah, that’s what I think too, and well I love Angel, I do, in a way, I mean he is all talk dark and handsome and all that, but it isn’t that ‘forever’ love that I just know is out there!” Buffy laughed, “I guess we are just a pair of hopeless romantics hey? Oh God don’t EVER let Xander hear us talking like this, we would never live it down.”
The two girls hugged before parting ways both feeling a little embarrassed still at having exposed their overly romantic side and yet knowing that their friendship was all the closer for it.
Chapter 7
Buffy woke to the sound of her Mom’s voice and tapping on her bedroom door, “wake up sleepy head, we have lots to do today so time for breakfast and then we’ll head off to the mall for the mandatory Mom and Daughter shopping day.”
“Right.” she thought to herself as she fought of the remaining fog of sleep, “Birthday, mine, yeah I remember!” Stretching and yawning Buffy made her way downstairs to join her Mother for breakfast. Over pancakes and juice the Summers women planned their day. First there would be facials and manicures followed by some serious clothes and or shoe shopping, then lunch, more shopping then home in time for party preparations before their guests arrived tonight. Somewhere in amongst all this Buffy had decided there was also going to be a serious and long overdue Mother/Daughter discussion in regards to a certain sacred duty. She knew Giles thought it was best if her Mother was protected from that particular aspect of her life but she had had enough of the lies and the deceit, also, more and more it seemed that her life as the Chosen one seemed to be encroaching on her Mom’s safety, so forewarned, forearmed and all that…right! The only thing Buffy couldn’t work out was exactly HOW she was going to tell her Mom and how she was going to get her to believe her!
An hour later, showered, dressed and ready to take on an intensive day of shopping, they were back in the kitchen for cup of coffee before heading off. Well, no time like the present, Buffy decided, also at home, no danger of being overheard when her Mom wigged out (which she was pretty sure she would do), also weapons at hand for proof and possible visual demonstration of slayer abilities.
“Mom”, she began, voice soft and hesitant, “there is something we REALLY need to discuss.” She looked up to see her Mom fixing her with an intent ‘Oh my God what is wrong’ look. “Ok, this is going to be kinda freaky, and also, not easy to explain so I kinda need you to let me finish and then you can ask whatever you want…ok?”
“Buffy, are you in some kind of trouble”, Joyce found it hard to keep the unspoken “again” out of her voice.
“No, no Mom, no trouble, just major wiggi-ness, ok?”
“Ok, I think, what is it honey?”
Buffy opened her mouth and the words poured out. “Right, ok here goes…vampires are real, and um, well, I am the Vampire Slayer, you know once into every generation yadda yadda yadda , hmm wish Giles was here, he is so much better at that bit than me. Anyway I kinda have special powers, you know, really strong and fast and then there’s the spidey sense, well vampire sense really but…….. I am so not doing a good job of this am I?” She hesitated looking at her Mom’s shocked, disbelieving face. “Mom, really, I know it sounds like you should call the men in white suits to come and take me away but what I am saying is true. Mr Giles, the school librarian is my Watcher, its kinda his job to train me and tell me what to fight and just plain be bossy Mr Stuck up, but hey he is good at it. And well, remember parent teacher night at school and those guys that broke in, well they were vampires, the one you hit with an axe his name is Spike he’s like a big time master vampire who is way old but not as old as Angel...”
“Angel? Your boyfriend, Angel?”
“Well, he was, but not any more, I kinda broke up with him last night, but yeah, THAT Angel. But he is a good vampire, he has a soul and he helps kill vampires and other bad guys.”
“Buffy do you have any idea how insane this sounds?” Joyce’s voice was shrill with anxiety.
“Yeah Mom, I do, really I do,” Buffy felt the hysteria building as she blurted “and I wasn’t supposed to tell you but I didn’t want to keep hiding this and having you think I’m like this major loser who burns down school buildings and gets in fights just because I feel like it and I SO don’t want you to be disappointed in me any more, I know I have caused you so much trouble and you probably wish you had any daughter in the world but me and I am so sorry Mom, I just…..”
“No Buffy, I have NEVER wished for any other daughter than you, I love you and I am proud of you,” she gathered her sobbing daughter into her arms, stroking her hair and gently rocking her, “you think of others before yourself, you are strong and sensible and I no mother could ever be prouder of her daughter than I am of you.” As Buffy calmed in her arms Joyce drew a deep sobering breath “Ok honey, start again, but slower this time, from the beginning.”
Several hours later they had finally made their way to the mall for the planned Mother/Daughter day. Both rather quiet and each lost in their own thoughts. Telling her Mum had been the scariest thing Buffy had ever done, scarier than facing the Master even, but she was glad she had done it. Yeah her Mum was freaked out, who wouldn’t be, but she had dealt. In the end after explaining things the best she could and answering a million questions, sometimes over again, she had passed the buck and told her Mom that her Watcher, Mr Giles, was the best person to ask and as he would be at the party tonight maybe she could save any further questions until then.
Chapter 8
Buffy ran a brush through her hair, taking time to admire her new skirt and top. So un-slayery, the long, flared skirt was a soft pink, while the cowl necked top was white and sat delicately above a white satin belt with tiny pink flowers embroidered on it. Gorgeous new white zip up ankle boots completed the outfit. She performed a half twirl admiring the way the skirt flowed cloudlike around her legs as a knock sounded on the door downstairs.
“Happy birthday, Buffy!” Willow exclaimed, holding a beribboned object excitedly, she looked at what her friend was wearing.
“I see the shopping day went well.” She handed Buffy the present, under all the ribbons was the most adorable stuffed pig in a pretty white lace bonnet with pink and white flowers and a big bow, a friend for Mr Gordo Willow announced, an excited smile on her face.
“Oh, Will, it’s the cutest.”
“Where’s the birthday girl?” A voice floated in from through the open door. Willow stepped aside and Xander walked in. He seemed to freeze temporarily when he saw Buffy. “Buff, hey. Happy Birthday.” With this announcement he handed her a basket, she looked at it, looking at him questioningly. She looked inside.
“Candy, yum!” She announced, she put the basket with the stuffed toy, turning as Joyce came into the room.
“Hey guys.” Joyce said, placing a bowl of potato chips on the table. “Is Mr Giles here yet?”
Buffy gave her mother a questioning look.
“He’s not here yet,” Willow said. “Oz should be here soon.” She added, hopefully.
“Well, we have been threatened with the possible arrival of Her Majesty Queen Cordelia.” Xander said.
“She told us she might come.. if she ran out of anything ‘actually interesting’ to do.” Willow offered.
“I wait with bated breath” Buffy said in mock solemnity. “Mmmm, chips.”
Willow followed Buffy over to the snacks table, Joyce came out with Soda and glasses. Xander admired the balloons.
Buffy answered a knock on the door. Giles stood there, someone else with him.
“Oz!” Willow said, excitedly. “It’s Oz.” She said, as though clarifying. “Did you two come together?” She looked confused.”
“No.” Oz answered. “We just arrived at the same time.”
After allowing enough time for him to wish her daughter a Happy Birthday and present her with her gift, a shopping voucher for the Mall, Joyce whisked the poor unsuspecting man away for interrogation. Buffy winced at the thought of what she had got her poor Watcher into and then shrugged it off, better him than her that’s for sure and he really was so much better at explaining these things than she was.
“So, Buff. What’s on the menu for tonight?” Xander rubbed his hands eagerly.
“I don’t know.” Buffy shrugged, tossing her hair back she added, “I was thinking music and dancing and party games, lots of good wholesome fun to be had by all! Later we can do cake maybe more games - or videos.”
“Ooh, party games, I love them.” Willow gushed. “Do you like party games?” She turned to Oz.
“Party games are pretty much always good.” Oz agreed, breaking into a gentle smile.
Buffy smiled to herself, he was nice, in a really, really quiet sort of way and you could see he adored Willow which made him more than alright in her books!
“Well, let’s start this dancing, you funky dance monkeys!” Xander announced.
Buffy grinned, this was going to be a whole night of fun and in the end, it didn’t really matter what they did, the important thing to her was that these people, the people who meant so much to her were here with her to share her special day.
**************
Across the street in the shadows cast by a large Sycamore a cigarette burned, its owner smiled at the obvious signs of happiness and enjoyment at the Summer’s residence. He pined to be there, to take her hand and dance with her, to join in the silly, frivolous party games and bask in her laughter. He longed to tell her just how beautiful she looked tonight, to kiss cake crumbs from her lips, to feel her lovely warm body lean back against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled into her hair and wished her a Happy Birthday. These were his dreams his wishes for this night, dreams he knew would never come true so instead he contented himself with observing from afar, assuring himself that his love was enjoying her special night. He smiled at her laughter, delighted in her joy and ached with a heart that was breaking with loneliness and longing.
Chapter 9
The doorbell rang as the evening was coming to a close. “I’ll get it” Buffy told her Mom, “It’s probably Cordy, she said she might pop by. Opening the door she came face to chest with the person, or vampire, she least expected to see. “Angel, um, hi.” She stammered.
“Buffy, may I come in” Angel’s voice was quiet and level, no hint of emotion coloured it.
“Of course, come in Angel” Buffy stepped back to allow her ex admittance to her home.
“Happy Birthday Buffy” Angel said capturing her in an embrace. She hugged him back briefly then moved to pull away, feeling smothered against the vampire’s overwhelming bulk. Angel recoiled slightly at her obvious discomfort in his arms, managing to keep the hurt from reflecting in his eyes he lowered his arms and stepped back. “ Would we be able to talk, Buffy,” eyeing her friends his voiced dropped to barely above a whisper, “in private I mean.”
“Uhh, yeah, sure. Come out to the back porch with me.” Buffy caught Willow’s worried eye as she made her way through to the kitchen and out the back, ‘it’s ok’ she tried to convey to her friend, willing her to understand.
Once outside awkwardness set in in earnest. Angel leant against the handrail of the steps while Buffy stood on the porch, her hands, not knowing what to do with themselves, alternating between being folded neatly in front of her and clasped behind her back. What happened to us she wondered, when did things get this difficult between us that we can’t even be in each other’s company without feeling so damned uncomfortable. She knew better than to think that things could be the way they had been, I mean you don’t break up with someone and expect everything to go on as usual but she had not expected things to degenerate to this incredible feeling of uneasiness in his company.
Yesterday she had been on top of the world anticipating a wonderful night out on a real date with her vampire boyfriend. Today she could barely see what she had seen in him. There was nothing ‘easy’ about Angel, he loomed over people, dark, intense and brooding.
There was a constant sense of agitated displeasure emanating from him when he looked at Buffy tonight, like a preacher with a disobedient flock. As if he alone could see the wickedness of the world and even though he had tried to show you the light, the correct path to follow, somehow you had managed to stumble from it, failing him, and yet that failure was what he had expected from you all along.
“Angel.” Buffy finally broke the ominous silence. “You said you wanted to talk, so make with the talky ok”
Angel’s brow creased briefly in frustration then smoothed again as he forcibly composed himself.
“Buffy, I wanted to give you this”, he held a small velvet box out to her, “and to try to work through whatever it is that happened last night, I love you Buffy, I don’t want to be breaking up with you and I just don’t understand what happened. All I want is to keep you safe, I was trying to warn you, to make you understand how dangerous Spike is, he isn’t like me Buffy, he doesn’t have a soul and he will hurt you!” He thrust the small box closer to her, urging her to take it.
Buffy took the box, trying to control her exasperation at his insistence in continuing right where he left of the night before. She opened it to reveal a silver ring, two hands holding a heart with a crown above.
“It's a Claddagh ring. The hands represent friendship, the crown represents loyalty... and the heart... Well, you know... Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody.” Angel looked at her waiting for a response. “Here let me…” He reached for her hand, Buffy pulled away, looking up finally to meet his eye.
“No, Angel…it…it’s beautiful, really it is, but no, I can’t accept this. I’m sorry Angel, what I told you last night, I meant it, we are over. We aren’t good together Angel, I…I…..” her voice dropped to a whisper, “don’t love you Angel, I don’t think I ever really did, not in the way you want me to. I will always care about you, but…”
“Oh, I see. So last night we have a fight about you spending time with a dangerous animal and then suddenly today you don’t love me and you never did….gee I think I see a pattern here, what about you Buffy, are you seeing a pattern?” In his fury his voice had risen and taken on a dangerous note, dark eyes became sinister as he loomed over the girl before him.
“Angel this has nothing to do with Spike, this has to do with us, with the fact that I am sick to death of you trying to control every aspect of my life, trying to turn me into some perfect example of what you believe a slayer should be. I broke up with you because what we had wasn’t love, not in any sense of the word, you do not love me, if you did you would not treat me this way, you wouldn’t try to change me all the time you would be my partner not my regulator. Angel you are not in love with me, you are in love with your own stupid power and I have had enough of it! Get over yourself Angel, I sure as hell have!” Buffy’s voice was quiet so as not to carry to those inside, there was however no doubting the resentment which poured into every word.
“You do not speak to me like that little girl, you have no idea what you are talking about, this is NOT over!” Angel growled.
Buffy looked with disbelief at her former boyfriend, she thrust the box back into his hands and fled inside locking the door behind her. Taking a few moments to compose herself she returned to her party and her friends, trying to block the Angel incident from her mind and enjoy the rest of her night.
“Is everything alright sweetie?” Her Mom appeared at her side, with a rather browbeaten and haggard looking Watcher behind her.
“Yeah Mom, everything is alright now. Um Angel won’t be coming around any more, and if he does….don’t invite him in ok! Giles, is there a way to you know uninvite him?”
Might I enquire as to the reason for your request? He hasn’t threatened you in any way has he?” Her Watchers eyes darkened allowing a brief glimpse of something or someone much darker and considerably more dangerous than the affable tweed clad Librarian.
“No, not really, he just, well I broke up with him and he just doesn’t seem to be wanting to take no for an answer. It’s not really something he has done, he just kinda gave me the wiggins, guess I’d just feel better knowing he can’t just wander in whenever he chooses. So we can stop that right?”
“Yes Buffy, it is in fact a rather simple incantation, I can perform it tomorrow if you wish, I just need a few supplies, I am sure Willow could assist me, she is showing quite an interest and aptitude for the arcane arts.
Buffy looked up at the anxious faces of the two adults in her life, flashing them a dazzling smile. “Cake…there is cake right?”
“Yes honey there’s cake, if you are ready for it.”
“Mmmm, definitely time for sugary goodness.” Buffy caught her mother’s eye, looking briefly at Giles she silently asked the question. Was her Mom alright, had she got the answers she required from the Watcher. Her Mom nodded almost imperceptibly, yes for now she was satisfied with the information she had received, however her look indicated that further discussions may be in order at a later date.
Just then another knock was heard from the front door, Giles opened it, prepared to confront the angry vampire with a rather blunt dismissal. What he was not prepared for however was the even darker force that walked in, high heels clicking.
“Oh, hey, Buffy. Wow, your hair looks almost stylish for once.”
“Cordelia.” Xander said. “Our night was not complete until you arrived.”
The dark haired girl blinked at him as though wondering why he was talking to her, she tossed her hair, turning back to Buffy as Joyce re-entered the room, carrying the cake.
Cordelia offered Joyce a beaming smile, handing Buffy a package which Buffy accepted, surprised, as Cordy pushed past her to where Joyce was cutting the cake.
Buffy unwrapped the gift to find a moisturizer and a small cosmetics package.
“Wow.” Willow commented.
“See how she somehow manages to mock you even when giving you a present,” Xander pointed out, “amazing.”
“So..” Cordelia was talking to Joyce. “Your nails look great, I was thinking of getting mine done again, where did you go for yours. I usually have someone in to do mine but she’s away for the next two weeks on honeymoon, can you say inconsiderate!”
*********************
Across the road the blonde vampire paced, expelling the rage and fury that rippled through him. He had seen his Grandsire arrive and be ushered into the house. Moments later he had heard the back door open and close The conversation that had ensued had him almost tearing across the road and ripping his Grandsire to shreds! Infuriating enough were the things Angelus had said about him, but hey, he was a big boy he could live with that, and there had definitely never been any love lost between the two vampires, he was fairly certain that anything he himself had to say in regards to the older vampire would be far from flattering. However when he heard his Grandsire’s voice rise in fury and threat it was all he could do to contain himself, to not run to the side of the girl he loved and protect her from the malicious evil he was so well acquainted with, to remind himself that The Slayer did not need protection from one vampire, even one as spiteful and vindictive as the one she currently faced. Seconds later he heard the door open and close again and watched as his incensed elder stormed off into the night.
Fists clenching and unclenching as he paced, he reassured himself with stolen glimpses of the continued merriment across the road, laughter and occasional squeals of delight doing much to calm his anger. As the frenzy eased his mind cleared enough to dwell on the conversation that had taken place. He knew now that Angelus was aware of his continued presence in Sunnydale, he knew also that The Slayer and his Grandsire had fought about him, with the result being Buffy breaking up with him. His pacing stopped as he allowed this information to permeate, a slow smile spread across his face, his eyes lighting with the fruitless hope infusing his being. Lighting another cigarette he continued to watch the Summer’s household until all the guests had departed and the occupants had fallen into a peaceful slumber. After which time he wandered off in search of a meal, his heart lighter, his step euphoric.
tbc
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