Chapter 4
“WILLIAM!!”
Spike sat straight up as the scream pierced the still of the night.
“WILLIAM! NO!”
He had heard that scream before. Once before. It had haunted him for years and yet, he had forgotten about it until this very moment.
“Elizabeth, do be careful,” William called after her.
“I will be fine,” she yelled back. “The hill is not as steep as it appears.”
“It may not be steep, but the grass may be slippery from last night’s rain.”
Elizabeth slowed down and waited for him to catch up. “Well, if you had asked to escort me, than I would have been forced to take your arm and I would not be rushing ahead of you,” she informed him.
“I apologize,” he stammered. “I did not know that you wished me to escort you.”
Elizabeth frowned a moment before whirling around as though to walk away. Unfortunately, she slipped on the grass and slid down the hill.
“Elizabeth!” William watched in horror as she fell off a small cliff and landed with a scream.
“WILLIAM! WILLIAM! HELP ME!”
“I’m coming, Elizabeth! Hold on!” He carefully raced down the hill and leaned over the cliff. Elizabeth was six feet below him, crying and holding her ankle. She was bleeding fiercely where a tree branch had pierced the ankle. She had not yet noticed him looking at her.
“WILLIAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!” She sobbed.
“I am here, Elizabeth. Just hold on and I will fetch help.” He removed his jacket and tossed it down to her. “Use this to stem the bleeding. I shall be right back.”
“Don’t-don’t leave me!”
“I shall only be gone a moment. I must fetch help.” He turned and ran up the hill, her screams chasing after him.
“WILLIAM!!!”
Spike rushed into the bedroom to find Buffy writhing on the bed in the throes of a nightmare. He pulled her into his arms, murmuring soothingly in her ear.
“Shh, you’re alright now. ‘Ve got you, luv.”
Buffy tensed in his arms as she woke up and Spike paused in his ministrations, unsure of how she was going to react. To his surprise, she threw her arms around his neck, sobbing.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I failed. I failed you. I should have protected you and I failed,” she cried into his neck. “Please forgive me. Please. I’m so sorry. I was selfish. Please forgive me. Forgive me.”
Spike rubbed her back gently. He wanted to ask her why she thought that she’d failed him, but she’d already cried herself to sleep.
XXX
The room was still dark, but Spike could sense that it was daytime. Buffy was curled up next to him, her face pressed in his neck. She was awake, but holding very still so that he wouldn’t notice.
“Morning, luv,” Spike said.
Buffy didn’t answer.
“Can tell you’re awake, so no use pretending not to be.”
Buffy sat up and turned her back to him. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to pretend a little while longer.”
Spike sat up behind her. “Pretend what?”
Buffy turned her head to look at him, tears glistening in her eyes. “Pretend that…that I was a just a girl who woke up in the arms of the man who loved her.” She turned her back to him again, wiping her tears away. “I’m sorry. It was stupid of me.”
Spike put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s not stupid, pet. I know that game very well.”
“With your Slayer?” Buffy asked.
“Yes, with her…and Dru.”
“You were with her for a hundred years. Do you expect me to believe that you didn’t love her?” Buffy turned to face him again.
“I loved her alright. She just didn’t love me…neither of them loved me.”
“They must be incredibly unintelligent. I don’t know how anyone could know you and not love you,” Buffy said softly.
Spike snorted. “This coming from a chit who only met me last night.”
Buffy stood up and walked away from the bed. She hugged her arms tightly around her waist, her back shaking with silent sobs.
“Please. Please go. I thought I could do this, but I can’t. It’s so unfair.” She raised her face to the ceiling. “DO YOU HEAR ME UP THERE? IT’S NOT FAIR!” Buffy fell to her knees, sobbing and rocking herself. “It’s not fair, not fair.”
Spike crossed the room and knelt next to her. “Buffy, luv-“
“Don’t call me that!” she snapped.
Spike started to move away from her when she turned and buried her face in his chest. Hesitantly, he wrapped his arms around her, rocking her slowly.
“Say my name,” Buffy whispered into his shirt. “Please. I want to hear you say my name.”
“Slayer, you just told me not to say your name.”
“I am Buffy like you are Spike. I want you to say my real name. Please.”
Spike closed his eyes, racking his brain for any idea about what her real name could be as she seemed so convinced that he knew it. Well, either that or he had another Dana on his hands.
Buffy made a small noise in the back of her throat. “Forgotten me. You’ve forgotten me…Oh, God!” She pulled away from his chest and caught his face in her hands. “I dreamed of our reunion, every night since the last time we were together. I thought you would find me. I thought you would know I was looking for you, but you never knew. I saw her, Drusilla, the night she made you a vampire. I thought it was fate making it so that we could be together. I was there when you rose from your grave, stupidly thinking that you would sense me there, but you didn’t. You didn’t notice me. You never noticed me!”
“Wot are you talking about you crazy bint!” Spike tried to pull out of her grip.
“I damned you and then I saved you, again and again. I stayed the mob in Prague. When you were lost in Africa, I brought you back. When the Hellmouth tried to swallow you, I saved your essence.”
“You’re the reason I showed up in Peaches’ office.” Spike began backing away from her.
“I gave them the spell to make you real again. I called the Slayers in to battle the Senior Partners when you were about to lose. And you have forgotten me.” She was crawling toward him.
“Who-or what-the bloody Hell are you!” Spike yelled.
“Elizabeth,” she sobbed. “I’m your Elizabeth.”
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