Buffy sat on her porch, reflecting on what had happened over the past few months. She knew that what had been happening between her and Spike was wrong, but she couldn’t bare the thought of not having his arms around her. The only time she felt safe was when she was in his arms.
"'lo, love," Spike said as he came to sit down beside her. She glanced over at him and made a decision.
"Spike," she said tentatively, "Do you want to go patrolling with me tonight?"
He looked slightly startled. He had accompanied her on many patrols, but she had never actually asked him to go with her.
"Sure , love," he said.
"Wait right here, I'll go ask Willow to watch Dawn." She rushed upstairs. After she spoke to Willow, she ran into her bathroom and hurriedly fixed her make-up. She wasn't sure why, but she wanted to look really nice for patrol tonight. She grabbed some weapons and went back outside. Spike was still sitting on the porch swing where she had left him.
"Let's go," she said.
~*~
They had been patrolling for hours and the only thing the had found were a few fledglings who were to dumb to know a master vampire and a slayer when they saw them. They had staked them easily and moved on to other cemeteries.
As they entered the last cemetery, Buffy turned to Spike and said, "Spike, would you like to..."
"What?" he asked curiously.
"Never mind." She said. On an impulse, she had been about to ask him to go to the Bronze with her. Now, she wasn't so sure that was a good idea. She didn't even know why she had been thinking it. They were enemies. She hated him. However, that same annoying part of her brain, which had wanted Spike to go to the Bronze with her, reminded her how safe and loved she felt when she was in his arms. She unconsciously moved a little closer to him.
"It's getting late, slayer," he said stiffly, "Why don't you go home. I'll finish patrolling for you."
"I'm fine," she said giving him a small smile.
Suddenly, out of the shadows, a voice hissed, "Slayer, you shall pay for what you have done to my people."
"I'm sure that what I've done to your people isn't nearly as bad as what I'm about to do to you," she said. Wielding a double bladed ax, she lunged at it. At the last second it stepped aside and grabbed her. It threw her. She flew head first into a crypt and slid to the ground where she lay motionless.
Spike roared in rage. He flew at the creature. The only thoughts in his mind were those of murder. No one could hurt his slayer and live. He realized, too late, that in addition to brains and brawn, the creature also had a sword. AS he slammed his fist into its stomach, with a satisfying crack, the creature ran him through. He ignore the pain blossoming in his stomach and kept pummeling to creature.
He realized that what he was doing wasn't working and decided to try a new tactic. He jammed his thumbs into the creature's eyes. It roared in pain and began flailing its arms. Unfortunatly, Spike didn't duck quick enough. One of its fists found him and knocked him to the ground. The creature sat on him and began to beat any part of him it could reach into mincemeat. After it slammed its fist into his head too many times, he mercifully fell into a sate of unconsciousness.
~*~
Buffy slowly regained consciousness. The first thing she saw was Spike's bloody and beaten body on the ground. She saw that the creature was still beating him up. She quickly grabbed the ax that was next to her, took aim, and threw it. It severed the creature's head from its spine. She leapt up and rushed over to Spike. She pushed the demon off of him and surveyed the damage. She felt tears form behind her eyes when she realized how badly beaten he was. She had to keep reminding herself that no matter how badly beaten he was, as long as he wasn't dust, he's live.
When Willow opened the door, she was surprised and shocked to see the shape that Spike was in. Buffy rushed inside. Willow helped her take him upstairs to her room.
"Get the first aid kit," Buffy commanded, "And bring some hot water and a towel, too."
Willow rushed to get. Buffy gently clasped his hand and whispered. "You'll be fine."
'you have to be' she added silently 'I don't think I could live if you weren't here'
It was then that she realized the truth. The one thing that she had been trying so hard to deny since she came back: she loved him. He loved her with all his heart. He had been tortured for her, defended her, and tonight almost dusted for her. No matter what she had said or done to him, he had always stayed.
'I'll tell him when he wakes up,' she decided. It was then that Willow ran in with the bandages and the bowel of water. Buffy took off his shirt as gently as she could, but she could tell that it still hurt him. Then, she began to clean and bandage his wounds.
She had known that his wounds were bad, but she hadn't realized that they were this severe. She winced in sympathy as she cleaned them. She, once again, guiltily realized that he had gotten these wounds defending her. She glanced at his face. His cerulean eyes met her hazel ones.
"Did we win, pet?" he asked groggily.
~*~
When Spike awoke, he was surprised to find Buffy's smell surrounding him. After a second, it all came rushing back: the demon, the fight, everything. He was even more shocked when he opened his eyes and found that Buffy was tending his wounds.
"Did we win, pet?" he asked.
"Yes, we did," she said. When she looked at him he was surprised to see that her eyes were shining with...relief? He saw some emotion in there, but he didn't dare let himself hope it was love. She had made herself perfectly clear that she could never love a soulless demon like himself.
'I'll tell him now,' she thought. The same fear that had kept her from telling him months ago, kept her from telling him now. Everyone that she loved seemed to leave her, and she knew that it would kill her if Spike left too. She got up and threw blankets over the windows to ensure that he couldn’t burn, come morning. "Is there anything I can get you?" she asked softly.
"I'll just leave and get out of your hair," he mumbled, " I don't want to bugger up your life."
"You'll stay right here until you're better," she said, "Would drinking some blood help you heal?"
"Pig's blood won't do much, love. Don't worry about it," he said.
She quickly made another decision. She sat down next to him and pulled back her hair. "Would mine help?" she said, looking straight into his eyes.
"I couldn't," he whispered, "I won't hurt you."
"You won't," she said with a smile, "I trust you. Now do it before I change my mind."
"You're sure?" he asked. It was hard for him to hold back. She smelled so good.
"Do it," she said. She helped him to sit up. He changed into his game face and bit her.
~*~
A myriad of emotions filled her. She had been preparing herself to feel pain, but his bite felt...good. She could feel moisture begin to pool between her legs. Her shirt suddenly felt too tight.
She was filled with his love for her. He poured it all through their one connection. She couldn't believe that she had ever doubted his love for her.
~*~
Her blood was like Heaven in his mouth. He could feel his pants beginning to get tight
He was shocked when he smelled her arousal.
He wanted nothing more than to take her and fuck the living daylights out of her, but he held back.
~*~
It seemed too soon when he withdrew his fangs from her neck. He licked the twin puncture wounds closed and planted a gentle kiss on the spot. She got up and changed into her pajamas. Then she lay down on the bed next to him. Spike pulled the covers over them. Buffy snuggled into his arms. Neither of them mention how different from her normal behavior this was. Spike tentatively wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.
"I love you," he whispered.
"Thank you," she said. He kissed her hair again and they both fell into a deep sleep.
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