Chapter 5
Tara
I can’t believe that Willow and Xander have abandoned Buffy. They seemed like such good friends.
I remember when my mother died how lonely I felt. I didn’t have any friends either but I did have my family, even though my family life was pretty bad, I wasn’t completely alone. Buffy and Dawn have no one but each other and if Buffy really is working two jobs, then Dawn is all alone.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath to calm myself. I feel hurt at Willow on behalf of Buffy. When I open them, I look around for the girl in question. We didn’t ever talk really except for the day at the hospital, but I feel a connection with the girl. We are both outcasts in our own way.
It takes me a few minutes to find her. She’s walking out of a door marked “Employees Only” and I follow her to the bar where I watch her put more drinks on a tray. I’m shaking as I walk over to her and I wish, not for the first time, that I wasn’t so shy.
It takes another few minutes for me to catch her attention.
”Tara!” She seems surprised to see me, but smiles warmly. “How are you?” She glances briefly over my shoulder and I know that she is looking for Willow. Her smile falters just a little when she sees that I am alone, but she turns her full attention on me.
“F-f-fine.” Oh great, I’m stuttering. I hate when I stutter. I breathe slowly and concentrate on the words that I want to say. “I-I was j-just w-wondering h-how you and Dawn were doing?”
Buffy looks at the ground a moment before meeting my eyes again. “We’re…we’re doing okay. Thank you for asking.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t k-know that…” I pause while I try to think of how to phrase this without upsetting anyone. “I didn’t know that you didn’t have any help.” I bite my lip and twist my hands together. Is she going to think I’m overstepping my bounds? Has she even realized that Willow and Xander are avoiding her or does she just think that’s she’s been too busy to get a hold of them? Maybe this was a bad idea.
Buffy’s smile completely vanishes.
“I-I-I-I d-d-d-in’t m-mea-“
“It’s okay,” she says quietly, glancing in the direction of the table where Willow, Xander, and Anya still sat. They weren’t visible through the crowd so she must have spotted us earlier. “I sorta figured it out. Chosen One and all, meant to be alone.” She was trying to sound light, but I could hear the bitterness in her voice.
“Buffy? I really didn’t know. I want…I want to help.”
XXX
Spike
A month? A bloody month I lost. I can’t believe it. I hang up the phone and sit back down on the couch. I’m more in shock that the Slayer mentioned that I’ve been gone a month than I am that she allowed me to stay in her house…by myself…with her sister.
“Are-are you staying?” Dawn asks.
“Was I really gone a month?”
Dawn nods. “Where were you?” she asks. “I-I really missed you and…I think Buffy did too.” She says the last part quietly.
“I was…lost,” I answer. I can’t really think of anything to say. It’s sort of the truth at least.
“What happened? Was it a spell?” Dawn’s eyes are wide.
I shrug and try to play it off. “All I know is that I went away for the weekend and apparently came back a month later. ‘M back though and that’s what matters. Never leaving you again,” I assure her.
She seems placated and walks into the kitchen. “Do you want some pizza?” she calls over her shoulder.
“No thanks, bit.” I flip on the telly and all I get is snow. “I think the cable’s out!” I yell.
Dawn walks back into the living room with a piece of cold pizza on a plate. “No, we had it turned off. I rented movies though. I get them free from work.” She flips off the one light that I had turned on and lights some candles. Then she pops the movie into the DVD player and sits on the couch next to me.
“Only one piece of pizza?” I ask. I remember my girl being able to eat a whole pizza by herself and loving every minute of it…come to think of it, she looks a little thinner than the last time I saw her.
“Yeah, I’m on a diet,” she mutters.
“What for? Yer thin enough as it is and don’t let anyone tell you different.”
“I’m not that hungry. I ate some candy at work.”
We watch the movie in silence. It’s some girly flick, but I don’t say anything. Dawn’s asleep halfway through the second movie. At midnight the telly suddenly turns off. I frown and click the power button on the remote a few times. Nothing happens. I stand up and flick the light switch. Hmm, power must be out. I look out the window. No one else’s power appears to be out.
I sit back down on the couch and wait for the Slayer. Something isn’t right here.
XXX
Buffy
I’m half asleep as I walk home and I’m glad that Spike offered to patrol. This night has been way on the weird side first with Spike showing back up and wanting to help and then Tara. Part of me wants to refuse their help and ask where they hell they’ve been all this time, but the other part of me, the really, really, really tired part of me is just glad they’ve offered.
My stomach growls for the eight millionth time today and I try to remember the last time I’ve eaten. I’ve been leaving as much of the food in the house for Dawn as possible. It’s not like we have a lot of it, and she needs it more than I do. I try not to think about how sad it would make Mom if she knew that I’ve been living off of Dawnie’s leftovers. Last week I actually retrieved her sandwich crusts out of the garbage, and it’s taking all my willpower to not steal food from work. More than once I’ve caught myself standing in the refrigerator trying to figure out how to stick a bag of lettuce up my shirt. I don’t want to say anything to Dawn although I think she caught the garbage incident. Thankfully she didn’t say anything, but I have noticed that she started leaving out any left over food instead of washing her dish off. I know she’s hungry too and I think, not for the first time, that she would be better off with Dad. She won’t go though and I don’t blame her. She’s trying to be so strong. It’s not fair, she’s only fifteen…
The lights are off when I get home. I sigh, open the door, and flick the light switch. Nothing. I flick it again.
“Funny thing,” Spike floats through the darkness. “Appears that your house is the victim of a one house black out.”
“Shit,” I mutter and shut the door behind me.
I hear the click of a lighter as Spike lights a candle and stands to face me.
“Where’s Dawn?” I ask.
He jerks his head toward the stairs. “Carried her to bed awhile back.”
“Thanks,” I say and reach for the candle.
He pulls it away from me. “Wot’s going on?”
I frown and cross my arms. “Seems you care an awful lot for someone who disappeared for a month.”
He frowns and I use the moment to grab the candle from him. I walk toward the desk and sort through the pile of bills until I find the one from the power company. Double shit. Who knew that they would really turn your power off if you didn’t pay your bill? Great. Now how am I supposed to wake up for work in the morning?
“’M sorry,” Spike says and I jump twenty feet in the air. I hadn’t heard him come up behind me. I turn around and he cocks his head to one side and looks at me. I hate it when he does that.
My stomach rumbles again and I wrap my arms around my waist.
“You should eat something,” he says. “Both you and the bit are too skinny.”
“I’m not hungry,” I retort.
His frown deepens. “The hell you’re not. Can see your bloody bones stickin’ through yer shirt and Dawn, hell, the second she fell asleep thought I was listening to the percussion section of the London Orchestra! Then, yer power goes out Buffy! Now, what in the bloody hell is going on here!”
He’s yelling and I can’t help but flinch, which makes me mad. How dare he? How fucking dare he?
“Get out,” I say lowly.
“No.”
“Get the hell out of my house, Spike!”
“No.”
My fist is heading toward his nose before my brain catches up with me. To my surprise though, he blocks it, catches my neck and pins me backwards against the table.
“You’re getting sloppy,” he says.
“Why didn’t your chip fire?” I ask.
He pauses a second. “Didn’t hurt you, did I?” he says finally. “Didn’t hurt you, so the chip didn’t fire.”
He’s hiding something, but I can’t put it together because the world is suddenly a little spinny.
“You need to eat,” Spike says as he puts his hands on my shoulders.
I nod weakly and let him lead me into the kitchen. He opens the fridge and takes out some cold pizza.
“Gonna have to get that power back on ‘fore your food goes bad.”
I nod and eat a piece of pizza. I’ll have to run to the bank during my lunch hour tomorrow. Crap, it’s Saturday and the bank closes at noon. I wonder if I can take an early lunch...
“Eat more,” he demands.
“No, it’s for Dawn.”
“Buffy, luv, you are not going to do Dawn any good if you don’t eat.” He’s using our real names. Hmm, that’s interesting.
“Are you going to patrol or am I?” I change the subject.
“You are going to bed, but this conversation isn’t over, Slayer.”
He practically slams the door behind him and I feel bad. Late help is better than no help, right? Even if the help is coming for my not-so-mortal enemy.
XXX
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