Author: Holli
Email: summersfinn@hotmail.com
Sunnydale, 2000-LAX, 3:45 p.m.
She had survived two and a half months without him and here she was to pick up Riley from the airport. She was actually nervous about seeing him again. There'd been phone calls, yes, usually for hours on end, but yet she still missed him deeply.
Buffy took a deep breath as she stared out the window, watching the planes land and take off. She remembered watching her dad's planes do this same thing when she was younger. But that was the farthest thing from her mind.
Standing there, watching the planes she realized that her dad had spent more time at the airport than with her. "Well, there's a nice trip down memory lane," she muttered to herself as her cell phone started ringing. Snatching it out of her purse, she answered it with Riley's habit, plainly, "Buffy."
"So, did you pick him up yet? Have there been smootchies? Does he look the same? C'mon, I need to know," Willow said her tongue in overdrive.
Buffy turned from the window, straining to hear her best friend what between the noise of the terminal and the airplanes descending and ascending the LAX runway. "He hasn't landed yet, Will."
Over the loudspeaker she heard, "Flight 633 from Des Moines is now unloading at Gate 91. Boarding will begin in one hour for the four o'clock flight to Des Moines." Buffy couldn't help but smile to herself.
"Will, his plane just landed. Look, I promised you and Graham that we'd go by if Riley wanted to. Let me just see where things lead when I see him. Okay? Good. I'll talk to you later," she hung up the phone quickly, placing in back in her purse as she calmly headed toward gate 91.
There was a throng of people crowded in front of the gate so she just stayed to the back for the time being. She had been patient this long. She could wait a few minutes longer, couldn't she?
Managing her way through the crowd, she got to the front just as the attendants were closing off the gates. She looked around hurriedly, searching for his face, for those blue eyes, his dirty blonde hair. He was nowhere to be seen. He had said the last time he'd called that he was coming back today. Today. She had cleared all of her plans to make sure that they'd have the day together.
Then, from behind her, she heard it. Her heart stopped, her breath caught in her throat. It sent shudders through her spine as it always did. Then, he said it again: "Buffy." She spun around and there he stood. Looking even better than he had when he'd left if that was possible. She just stood there for the longest time, gawking at him. He was wearing a pair of loose fitting blue jeans, a navy blue shirt and a short sleeved plaid shirt over the tee. He looked perfect.
Finally, she said, "Riley," then bolted into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck. Her lips plundered his mouth and he welcomed her tongue into his mouth. Everything that she could muster, her longing, her love, her lust, her passion, she put into this kiss. After realizing that they were probably making a scene, she slid off of him onto her own two feet.
He'd just set her on her feet when he pulled her into his arms again, hugging her tightly against his chest. He just had to touch her. He had to make sure that this was indeed real. He had longed to be with her all summer and now here she was.
Finally he let her go, grabbing his suitcase at his feet. "Come on," she said, grabbing his hand. "So, how was your flight?" she asked him, pulling him through the throngs of people to the exits.
They chatted casually until they got to the car. Buffy opened the trunk to her mom's Jeep Cherokee so that Riley could put his suitcases in. Then, she unlocked the doors and they climbed in. Buffy sat in silence for a few moments just staring at the steering wheel, unable to look at Riley for some reason.
As usual, Riley was the one who broke the tension. He scooted closer to her, putting his hand on her knee. "I've missed you." He kept it there for a few moments and when she didn't flinch or turn to him he moved his hand from her knee as his head fell back against the cushioned headrest. "All those nights in Huxley I would just lay in bed, awake, staring up at the ceiling wondering how you were doing, what you were doing, what you were wearing," he confessed with a smile.
Taking a moment to glance at her he saw the smile that had crept across her lips. God, how he'd missed that smile. "This," he said, reaching into his backpocket, "is what kept me sane." He handed her the picture.
Taking the picture from him, she took a moment to glance at the Polaroid in her hand. "Oh, my God!" she said, outrageously, laughing softly. "I'd forgotten all about this," she said, looking at him.
He turned to her. "It kept you fresh in my mind. I think that about every two seconds I would take it out and just look at it. I would close my eyes and I could remember our last night together perfectly," he told her. "Do you remember that night?"
She nodded her head, reaching out to brush away the blonde strands of hair that had fallen across his forehead. She had missed being able to do that. She had missed so much while he had been gone. Looking into his searching eyes she answered, "Yeah I remember that night…very vividly in fact, but I remember every night I spend with you."
Feeling that he needed to lighten things between them, he asked her, "So, do you still want your panties back?"
Buffy laughed softly, sitting up straighter in her seat, shaking her head. "So, um, did you…um, how was Huxley?" she asked, stuttering over her own words. She didn't want to come out and bluntly asked the question that was on the tip end of her tongue. She trusted Riley, it wasn't about finding out whether he strayed or not, but she was more or less curious.
"Huxley was…good I guess. I caught up with some of my old high school friends. We hit some parties, went to a strip club about once a week and then there was this girl…she looked a lot like you."
Seeing the look on her face he pulled her into his arms. "I was joking," he whispered in her ear. "I told you I was going home to relax. I relaxed. I argued with my younger brother and sister. I went horseback riding. I went fishing. The only females I saw was Stephanie, my mom and my aunt Lisa who is always on my case when I'm home because I don't go see her enough. The rest of the time you were what I thought about and looked at it," he said, gesturing to the picture that she still held.
She sighed deeply. "I'm sorry, Riley. I'm being difficult. I just don't know how to go about doing this. Do we pick up where we left off? We can't do that because we've been apart for two whole months. Do you know how we go about fixing this?" she asked, turning toward him.
He kept moving closer to her until his lips were just inches from hers. He could hear her heartbeat quicken and feel her jagged breaths. "First," he said, "we need to stop talking." Then, he attacked her mouth, his tongue delving to the farthest corners as if he had intentions to devour her whole right there in the airport parking lot.
She let herself sink into the kiss. So many nights she'd spent cuddling Mr. Gordo close, wishing that it were him. Remembering where they were, she pushed him away, saying, "We can't do this here. Let's get outta here."
Sunnydale, 2007
Buffy stood in the doorway to the twins' nursery, watching as they slept. She couldn't believe how big they'd gotten in such a short time. But she couldn't expect them to stay small forever; however much she wanted them to. Watching them, she wished that she could've given them the happy, evil free life she'd always dreamt of. Riley told her time and again that there was nothing she could do about that. She knew he was right. Her children were happy, yes, but they had been happier when Willow and Graham were around. She sighed as she thought about her best friend.
Shortly, after Willow and Graham had married, Graham had gotten a new assignment transferring him to Mississippi. Willow hadn't wanted to leave, but she'd had no choice but to move. As much as it had pained her to let Willow go, she knew that Willow was safer with Graham, at least she wouldn't be in any danger.
Then, two months after Willow and Graham moved to Mississippi Willow found out that she was eight weeks pregnant. Both Willow and Graham had been ecstatic when they'd found out. She smiled as she remembered the day she'd gotten the call and the conversation she'd had with Graham.
She and Riley had been playing hide and seek with the twins; the only way to get them to bed on time was to tire them out and hide and seek was their favorite game. She'd been hiding when the phone rang. The moment she'd stepped out of the closet, Logan had launched himself on her leg, yelling, "I got her! I got her!" She surrendered herself to him as Riley met her in the hall, Kennedy attached to his leg. She handed Logan over to him, informing him that he had bath duty. So, while he bathed them, she answered the phone.
The moment she picked up the phone, Graham said, "Buffy! We're pregnant." Abashed by this news, Buffy quickly asked how this happened. Medically, she'd never known a guy to get pregnant. "You know what I mean! Willow is carrying it, but we're pregnant, she is, but we are…you know what I mean. New father blabber, I guess you could say," he told her.
"Graham, take a deep breath. In, out. In, out. In, out," she instructed, listening as he did as she said. "Okay, now let me talk to Will." Willow asked her how the twins and Riley were before she started talking about the baby.
Closing the door to the nursery, Buffy moved down the hall toward the staircase. She went downstairs to clear up dinner. Willow and Graham had had their first child, a son, whom they named Nicholas Riley Miller, in the fall of 2003. Two years afterward, they had a second child, a daughter, Georgina Anne.
But Willow and Graham weren't the only ones to have moved on with their lives. Every single member of the Scooby Gang was now off in different parts of the world, living their own lives. Five months after Willow and Graham had married and relocated to Mississippi, Xander popped the question to Anya. But their wedding wasn't as formal or traditional as hers and Willow's had been. First of all, theirs was in Vegas in front of an Elvis impersonator. Apparently, Anya always wanted to be married by the King and walked down the aisle to "Can't Help Falling in Love with You."
But that was the mystery that was Anya. She and Riley had drove to Vegas to attend the wedding, leaving the twins in the care of her mother and Giles. Spike rode with them to Vegas, but he didn't leave with them. Two weeks after they'd returned to Sunnydale, they'd gotten word from Willow that Spike had dropped by her and Graham's with his 'wife'. Seemingly, he'd married a Showgirl in Vegas. But that marriage soon fizzled within a few months. Spike returned to Sunnydale and was now working nights as a bartender at the Bronze.
Spike was the only member of the Scooby Gang left and the twins just adored him. At first Riley hadn't been too keen on the fact that Spike was spending so much time at the house with the twins, but after a few nights worth of fighting and sleeping alone, he'd had no choice but to accept Spike. That had been years ago, though. Now Spike was really his only buddy.
Once Graham had left, Riley only had Forrest, Xander and Giles left. Then, Xander and Anya married and moved to L.A. They were closer than Graham, but still far. When Jules' mom got sick, she and Forrest packed up and moved back to Berkeley. They had only intended to stay for a few months, but that had been three years ago. Jules called her every week, updating her on her mom's condition and whatnot, promising to get back to Sunnydale soon.
Buffy cleared off the table, looking into Kennedy's bowl, sighing. The child did not eat, but Logan, God; he was like, Riley. That child could eat her out of house and home. She scraped the remnants of their dinner into the trash, and then placed the bowls into the sink with the rest of the dishes she had left to wash.
As she wiped down the countertop, her thoughts drifted to the last person to leave Sunnydale. Giles. After Giles had broken up with Olivia, she had thought that he'd never get involved with anyone else after that. Then, one-day things suddenly changed for him…for her as well. One day he was suddenly humming love songs, decorating his apartment with fresh cut flowers and making bi-weekly trips to San Francisco.
At first she didn't put it together. It just couldn't be. Then, when she'd gone to Giles' one afternoon, there her mother was, wearing Giles' robe no less. She had wanted to lash out at both of them for keeping it from her, but only found herself happy. Now her mom had somebody and Giles was who made her happy.
She'd been so lost in her own thoughts, she hadn't even heard when Riley got back. She had looked up and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw him leaning against the wall, staring at her. "Dammit, Riley, you nearly scared me to death!" she told him, throwing the dishcloth playfully at him.
"Sorry, sweetie, but you were so focused on scrubbing the counter that I didn't want to disturb you," he told her, pushing himself off the wall to go to her. Pulling her to him, he wrapped his arms around her waist, asking, "So, where are our little monsters?"
"Well, if you're talking about Logan and Kennedy, they are upstairs, sound asleep. The dogs are outside, though," she told him. He kissed her lightly on the lips, then she watched as she crossed the room, flinging open the backdoor, calling to their dogs. Soon the two four legged critters exploded into the kitchen, running directly for her. Knowing better than to jump up on anyone, they sat down at her feet, staring up at her.
Suddenly, they each became aware of the pitter-patter of little feet. The two little blonde heads peered around the corner, thinking they were unnoticed by their parents. "Who wants ice cream?" Buffy asked. They flew into the kitchen at the mention of their favorite dessert, straight toward the arms of their father, yelling, "Daddy!"
Kennedy flew into Riley's arms, while Logan sank to his knees to play with their two dogs Jasper, a Pug and Shadow, a golden retriever. She had made the mistake of sending Riley to town to buy the kids a dog since they'd been begging for one since first watching 101 Dalmatians, but he didn't come back with one dog. No siree. He had to come back with two dogs. But they had grown on her. She actually found herself snuggling up with them when Riley wasn't home and besides, the kids adored them.
"So, Princess, what'd you do today?" Riley asked Kennedy, putting her on the bar so that they were eye to eye. He couldn't believe how much she looked like Buffy. It was uncanny. He remembered when he was helping Joyce and Giles move into their apartment, he'd come across some photo albums of Buffy when she was little. Surprisingly, she looked exactly like Kennedy does now when she was this age. Daughter was just as beautiful as her mother was.
She was kicking him with her tiny little feet. "Well, Mommy and I watched Cinderella before my nap and we played CandyLand and she squirted us with the water hose," she told him. He looked up at Buffy who was scooping ice cream into three separate bowls. If he knew Buffy right, she was going to make him eat dinner before he got dessert. He'd bet his life on it.
"She squirted you with the water hose! Oh, no! Why'd she do that? Should I spank her?" he asked his daughter, watching as her green eyes widened at the thought of him spanking Buffy.
She shook her head, her blonde curls bouncing. "Uh-uh! We wanted her to do it. She only did it because Logan squirted her first." Riley turned on his son who was slowly scooting beneath the kitchen table.
"Logan, come here," he said. He watched as Logan was pushed from out from under the table by Shadow. He and Buffy couldn't help but laugh. As if knowing what was about to come, he burst into tears. "Stop crying, I wasn't going to fuss."
Logan stopped crying for a millisecond then began all over again. "Good going, Riley," Buffy told him, walking to her son. She scooped him up in her arms, cradling his head against her shoulder as Riley gave her disapproving glares.
He turned his attention back to his daughter when she began tugging on his shirtsleeve. "Why does Mommy do that?" Kennedy asked Riley.
"Do what?" he asked her, pushing a strand of her blonde hair from her face. She was so much like Buffy in so many ways. He knew that if he ever lost Buffy, looking into his daughter's eyes, just looking at her, would break his heart.
"She treats Logan like a baby," she told him. Riley couldn't believe his ears. Did those words actually come out of this five year old's mouth? "She doesn't treat me like a baby," she said, pouting. She even had the pouty lip thing down exactly like Buffy.
Buffy looked from Riley to Kennedy. After finally getting Logan to stop crying, she placed him on the floor, ushering him off into the living room to play with the dogs. She walked around the bar, sitting down beside Riley. She put her hand on her daughter's knee, then pulled Kennedy so that she was sitting directly in front of her. Seeing the looks that Kennedy kept on giving Riley she turned to her husband asking, "Could you please leave us alone?"
He nodded, then quickly got up, joining Logan in the living room with the dogs. Once he was out of sight, Buffy looked at Kennedy. "What made you say that?" she asked her daughter, her heartbreaking from what she'd said.
Kennedy shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. When Daddy's home you always play with Logan, but not me," she said, tears forming in her eyes, her bottom lip beginning to tremble.
Buffy pulled the small child into her arms, smoothing back her hair. "Shh! It's okay. I only do that because I know that when Daddy's home, he wants to play with you. I play with you when he's not home," she told her. She leaned Kennedy back so that she was looking into the child's bright green eyes. "I love you just as much as I love your brother, but yes, sometimes I do give him more attention than I give you, but it doesn't mean anything. Okay?"
Kennedy threw her arms back around her neck. "I love you, Mommy," she whispered in her ear.
"I love you, Princess," she whispered back. Suddenly, Kennedy began giggling. "What's so funny?" she asked.
"You called me Princess. I thought only Daddy called me Princess."
Buffy stroked her daughter's hair. "No, baby. Daddy started doing it after me. It stuck with him, though. I started calling you Princess when you were still a baby because that's what you looked like…a princess," she told her. "Do you know Gram used to call me that when I was little?"
Kennedy's eyes brightened and widened. "Really?"
Buffy nodded. She lifted Kennedy off the counter, setting her on her bare feet on the floor. "Now go get Daddy and Logan and tell them to come eat!" she instructed her, patting her on her butt. Kennedy ran yelling to them that the ice cream was ready.
She set the children up with their ice cream at the table, then placed a bowl of hot spaghetti in front of Riley. He looked at her his blue eyes dark. "But Mom, I wanted ice cream!" he objected, making the twins laugh. His two smart children reminded him that Mommy was his wife not his mother. "Well, you call her Mommy, don't you? She feeds you and dresses you. She does the same thing with me. So I should get to call her Mommy, too."
The twins exchanged looks, then looked at Buffy. "Mommy, do you bathe Daddy like you bathe us?" Logan asked her. Buffy looked at Riley who gave his 'warning' look that he always gave her instructing her not to tell the twins too much.
She shook her head. "No. Daddy is a big man. He can bathe himself," she told them, though usually they bathed together. When they could find the time and if Riley wasn't back from work too late, that was.
"See? You can't call her Mommy, then," Kennedy told him. He sighed. Sometimes his children were smarter than he was. Of course, spending the majority of their day at daycare while he and Buffy worked and the rest of the time alone with their mother, they had to be smart.
"Alright, alright you three. Am I going to have to send each one of you to your room?" she asked them. They exchanged looks then shook their heads.
"Mommy, how come Daddy has to eat dinner before he gets dessert? How come he can't have dessert before dinner?" Kennedy asked her.
Boy, they were full of questions tonight weren't they? "Well, because dinner is important and if you knew Daddy's sweet tooth, you would understand. If I would let Daddy skip dinner every night and give him dessert he'd be fat and wrinkly and would no longer be cute and I'd have to divorce him and go steal Uncle Graham from Aunt Willow," she said, sneering at Riley.
"Mom, when are we going to see Aunt Willow again?" Logan asked her. "I miss her."
Buffy leaned down, kissing the top of his head. "Yeah, me, too," she said, sadly. She looked down into the ice cream bowls, seeing that they were finished. "Come on, guys, let's go in the living room so that Daddy can eat peacefully," she said, ushering them out of the room.
Buffy was lying on the sofa, Logan sitting between her legs, Kennedy asleep on her chest, watching The Little Mermaid. They had almost the entire Disney Classics Edition and they watched one every night so the twins would fall asleep. Usually it was Kennedy to fall asleep first since she was the active one. "Mom, can we turn this off? I'm getting tired of the singing crab," Logan told her. Without her approval, he flipped off the VCR. At that moment, Kennedy woke up. "Turn it back on!" she yelled at her brother.
"Hey hey you two! Stop it! Come on. Bed time," Riley said. The twins grunted but did as he said, knowing that arguing with their father got them nowhere. He turned to Buffy. "I'm gonna put them to bed. Don't move," he told her, then left the room to tuck in the twins.
A few minutes later he was back. He found Buffy standing in front of the fireplace, running her fingers over a picture. He walked up behind her to see what she was looking at and saw that it was the last group picture of the Scooby Gang. It had been taken at Willow and Graham's wedding. Everybody was there all except Jill and Kevin. It still hurt to think about what happened all those years ago.
He put his hands on Buffy's shoulders. She didn't flinch. She didn't turn around. She just continued staring. "I miss them, Riley. I miss not having Willow here," she said, sadly. "It's just not the same. Our kids were supposed to grow up together. They were supposed to be best friends or cousins…whatever. We weren't supposed to fly off in different directions," she told him, tears falling from her eyes.
He pulled her into his arms. "It's gonna be okay. They're not gone for good. They'll be back."
"When? When? Wills has been gone for years, Riley. She's not coming back. They're not coming back! I feel like…it feels like she's dead, but much, much worse," she choked out before her sobs became too uncontrollable. What was he supposed to do? He knew that sooner or later Buffy would break down. And the reason for this now? The anniversary of when she'd moved to Sunnydale…and she had no one to celebrate with, but him.
Sunnydale, 2000
"What do you think you are doing?" Buffy asked, hands on hips, staring from her boyfriend to Xander. Both guys looked at her incredulously. They exchanged looks, shrugging their shoulders.
"You told us you wanted it over there," Xander told her. He nodded to Riley; they put the bed back down. "Now make up your mind, Buff, because we will not be moving your bed from one wall to the other all morning," Xander said.
Buffy looked at them, shaking her head. They'd been helpful enough to agree to help move her and Willow into their apartment and yet look what she was doing. She was making them move her bed back and forth from one wall to the other. She could see that Riley wasn't going to be irritant with her for much longer. She fell down on the bed. "I'm sorry guys. I'm just…I want everything to be perfect. I'm glad that you're doing this, I am. Come on, let's take a break," she told them.
As she was headed from the room, something flashed through her mind: Riley in a tuxedo, she in a long, white dress in a church. She got dizzy and bumped into the wall in the process. Riley caught her arm before she fell. "Buffy? Are you okay?"
She looked up at him for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just hungry. I haven't eaten anything all day. Come on," she said, leading them into the kitchen. Willow was sitting on the cabinet feeding apples slices to Graham. "Okay, you two none of that in the kitchen," she told them as she threw open the refrigerator.
"Oh, hey. Where've you two been?" Graham asked Riley and Xander. The two boys were drenched with sweat and looked annoyed.
"Princess Buffy over there had us moving her bed from one wall to the other. She still hasn't been able to decide which wall is her favorite," Xander said sarcastically as Graham handed him a beer. He saw the looks that Buffy shot at him and he regretted opening his mouth at all.
Riley leaned against the cabinet, watching Buffy carefully. He'd been back less than a week and already she'd put him to work. He didn't mind, though, because he loved doing stuff for her, but he would've liked to spend some time alone with her. That first day back had been great. They had spent it together walking on the beach just reminiscing about summer and their romance last year. He realized that the summer hadn't changed them or their relationship much and much to Buffy's dismay, they had been able to pick up where they had left off.
"What do you guys want? Ham or turkey?" she asked over her shoulder as she peered into the refrigerator. "Then we have bologna, you two might like that since all I hear from you are oink oink," she teased. Suddenly she was being lifted by the waist. She thought about kicking whoever it was but decided against it. "Whoever has me I am going to kick your ass!" she threatened. Then, there was a splash and she was wet.
When she resurfaced, Riley, Graham, Xander and Willow were crowded around the pool staring down at her, laughing hysterically. "Ha ha, very funny, Riley!" she said as her boyfriend launched himself into the pool. Xander soon followed and Graham threw a reluctant Willow in before he jumped in.
Buffy swam to the edge of the pool, hanging onto the sides of the pool as something else flashed through her mind: A scene much like this one except it was with a water hose and it was a small child attacking her, no, two small children. She watched the scene play out in her head. A blonde little boy who looked so much like Riley was chasing her around, spraying her with the water hose. A little girl was standing to the side her soft laughter filling the air, two dogs crowded at her feet. Then they said the one word that made her blood run cold: "Mommy!"
Sunnydale, 2000
The word rung in her ear. Mommy. Could that actually be her? Could those really be her kids? Or was her mind playing some kind of joke on her? If it was, then who was the father? Maybe she wasn't married at all.
"Buffy," she heard Riley call her name. Then, she felt his hands on her shoulders, willing her around. She turned around to face him still in shock of what she'd just seen. Why now? Why was she having these visions now? She never had visions before. That was Jules' territory. She looked Riley in the eye, managed a small smile, then everything went black after that.
Riley shook her. "Buffy? Buffy?" he patted her cheek lightly. Nothing. "Graham! I need your help!" he yelled to his friend. Graham jumped out of the water, moving along the edge of the pool where Riley was treading water with Buffy.
Graham grabbed onto Buffy's arms, pulling her out of the water. Riley jumped out as Graham laid Buffy flat on the pavement. "What happened?" Graham asked him, cradling Buffy's head on his lap as they started CPR.
Riley shook his head. "I don't know. She was looking at me, then suddenly her eyes rolled back in her head and she collapsed in my arms," he told Graham. Buffy coughed, chest heaving, gasping for breath. Her eyes opened, focusing on the four people, staring down at her, worry and grief plaguing their faces.
She was quiet a moment, then she asked, "What?"
Riley looked down at her. "What? What, she asks! What happened to you?" he asked her, helping her to sit up. She looked up at him, confused. "You fainted…or something in the water."
"Oh." What was she supposed to say? Usually, her visions, or her dreams rather, happened at night and told of forthcoming evil. They never led her into a future life. If that was in fact her future life. Unless…could something be happening in the alternate universe, in the future, that was beckoning to her? Could that be it? No, it had to be her mind playing tricks on her. It was the aftershock of having Riley back. That was it. Yeah, that made sense.
Riley helped her to her feet, leading her back into the apartment. Willow fetched a towel while he set her down on the couch. He wrapped the towel around her, but she easily shrugged it off. "Not cold, wet," she told him. They watched as she got up from the couch and walked to her room, closing the door behind her.
For a few seconds they all remained quiet, staring blankly at the door. "Okay, so, um, does anybody think the Buff is a little traumatized by her little water excursion?" Xander asked them.
"Maybe it has to do with when she drowned. Too much for her too handle," Willow said, always the voice of reason. She grabbed Graham's hand, forcing him to his feet, urging the other two to do the same. "Buffy will be fine. She'll snap out of this. She always does. Come on. We still have work to do."
Mississippi, 2007
Willow leaned against the sink, staring at Graham in awe, letting the news still sink in. "What do you mean we're moving? Why? When? Where?" she asked in a rush, staring at her husband. She peered into the living room where Nick and Georgina were playing. Well, Nick was watching Teletubbies and Georgina was in her playpen, chewing on a stuffed penguin.
Graham sat down at the table, tackling the laces of his combat boots. "Exactly what I said, Will. I was transferred again. They need me elsewhere. We have to move as soon as possible," he told her. Then, figuring that he may as well be honest with her he said, "I signed up for a transfer."
He could feel those green eyes boring into him. "You what?" she asked, a little outraged. "Why would you do that? I thought you liked it here. We're happy. We've made good friends. Why do you want to leave?" she asked him.
She was keeping up a dissociated front. Frankly, she would love nothing more than if they would get transferred back to Sunnydale. But that was a pipe dream, wasn't it? She missed Buffy. Sure, they'd made friends here, but none would ever compare to her best friend. Buffy was irreplaceable. Graham acted strong, but she knew that he missed Riley and Forrest.
Graham took a deep breath. "Willow, you can't lie to me," he said, looking at his wife. She had barely changed since the day they married. She had wanted to let her hair grow back, but he demanded that she keep it short. He liked it short. "I know that you're about as happy here as I am. I know that you've wanted to return to Sunnydale for some time. I know you miss Buffy and Xander just as much as I miss Riley and Forrest and frankly, I think that there's only one thing to do…" he told her.
Watching, her face brightened, her green eyes lighting up the entire room. He hadn't seen that twinkle in her eyes since after Nick was born. "Are you serious? I mean, are we really…?" she asked him, unable to stop the excitement that coursed through her body as she started walking toward him.
He nodded simply. "Hellmouth, here we come." Before he could react, Willow launched herself into his arms, kissing him long and hard, with all the passion that she could muster. She climbed onto his lap, her hands running through his brown hair, her tongue dueling with his. He couldn't remember a time when she'd been so forceful, so demanding. He liked it.
If Nick hadn't interrupted up them, they probably would've gone at it right there on the kitchen floor. Their children didn't give them open opportunity to have time alone together. Nick was always having dreams and Georgina, well, she refused to sleep anywhere else but with Mom and Dad. Willow tore her lips from Graham long enough to look at her son. "Hey Champ. What's up?" Willow asked, pulling him between she and Graham. He kept rubbing his eyes.
"Sleepy," he said, yawning. Willow ran her fingers through his brown hair, then, sliding off Graham's lap, hefted Nick into her arms. "I'll be back," she told Graham. He watched as she disappeared down the hall. While she was gone, he walked into the living room, squatting in front of the playpen in front of Georgina.
Immediately, she crawled over to him. She stood up, holding onto the rail of the playpen, smiling at him, reaching out to grab his nose. Smiling, he lifted her out of the playpen, falling onto the sofa with her in his hands. Sunnydale. Boy, he couldn't wait. The last time he'd talked to Riley he said that things in Sunnydale had quieted down since the Hellmouth had been sealed. He found that good especially for Buffy and Riley.
Their marriage had been so strained when Buffy had been doing nightly patrols. He remembered those late night talks with Riley as he waited for Buffy to come home. But sadly, there hadn't been late night talks in over three years. He hated to say it, but that's what had come of his friendship with Buffy and Riley.
"Three years." Staring up at his daughter he said, "Well, kiddo, it looks like you're finally going to meet your Aunt Buffy and Uncle Riley. And Kennedy and Logan. They are just going to love you." He put Georgina back in her crib, then walked to the bookshelf where they kept all the photo albums.
He took one from the shelf, fell back onto the couch and began leafing through it. Smiles came to his face as he looked at the pictures of the happy family: Buffy, Riley, Logan and Kennedy. The last time he'd seen the twins had been shortly after Buffy and Riley's third wedding anniversary; the twins had been a little over two years old at the time.
He and Willow had been married by that time and they'd taken Buffy and Riley out for their anniversary along with Xander and Anya and Forrest and Jules. At dinner that's when they had dropped the bomb about his transfer. The look on Buffy's face had been ghastly.
He couldn't believe how insensitive he had been, breaking the news to them on their wedding anniversary no less. After the announcement, Buffy had simply looked at Riley, asking him to take her home. Riley apologized to him, then took his wife home. He had hoped for his news to be good, but it had only wrecked his friendships especially with Buffy and Riley.
Closing the album, he stared at the phone sitting on the coffee table in front of him. He wanted to call. He wanted to tell them that he, Willow, and the kids would be back in Sunnydale within the week, but instead, he waited. He wanted to surprise them.
Sunnydale, 2007
Riley lay awake, staring at the ceiling, cradling his wife close. He wished that he could take all the pain away. He didn't want her to feel so alone, but she did. Even though she had him and the twins, she still felt utterly alone without all of her friends. Yeah, she had friends at work from the hospital, but there was only one person that knew her, knew of what she suffered through as a teenager, knew the heartaches that she underwent until she met him; only Willow knew about the many times she'd saved the world. None of her friends at work knew about that.
Sighing, he slid out of her embrace, searching the floor for his boxers. He pulled them on, then quietly moved out of the room. Downstairs, he found the twins already awake, watching TV peacefully with Jasper and Shadow. Scratching his chest and yawning he asked them, "What are you doing up?" He looked at the clock, realizing that it was only fifteen past seven. God, it was still early.
"Watching TV," Logan told him as if he couldn't see that already. He collapsed onto the sofa beside Kennedy who was holding on tightly to Jasper. She released Jasper who soon jumped off sofa and slid underneath. It was his favorite hiding place. Kennedy climbed onto his chest, staring down at him with her bright green eyes. Her blonde curls were tangled from sleep, but she still looked beautiful. He was one lucky man to have two beautiful women in his life. "Daddy, why was Mommy crying?"
Suddenly, his breath caught in his throat. If that was one thing that he and Buffy had agreed, it was that they never fought in front of their children or let them see when they were upset. What was he supposed to tell them now? That Buffy missed Willow so much that it hurt her to breathe? He couldn't tell them that because then they would be worried sick about her. Logan climbed onto his chest beside Kennedy. "How do you know that Mommy was crying?" he asked her.
Logan butted in. "We heard her crying last night. Why was she crying? Did you make her cry?" Logan asked him.
He pushed the twins off his chest, making them sit in front of him. "No, I didn't make Mommy cry," he said, smoothing back their hair, "Mommy misses Aunt Willow and Uncle Graham very much that's why she was crying."
They nodded their heads, staring intently up at him. "Where is Aunt Willow and Uncle Graham?" Kennedy asked him.
"Aunt Willow and Uncle Graham are living far away."
"Why?" they asked in unison.
Questions, questions, questions. They took after their mother in their curiousness. He had never met three people who asked questions like Buffy and the twins. One day he'd actually made the mistake of suggesting to go grocery shopping for Buffy. The twins, loving to go shopping, wanted to go along. Big mistake taking them.
He paid for it when they got to the register. They asked the lady checking them out why money was green, why the machine made the cha-ching noise. He stood in line for at least fifteen minutes while the lady answered their questions and showed them how to work the machine. Buffy had simply laughed when he'd told her about it, vowing never to go grocery shopping with them ever again.
"Because Uncle Graham got another job."
"Will we ever see them again?" Logan asked.
Riley let the resolve seep into his voice. "I hope so. I really hope so," he said to them. Throwing each one over a shoulder, he headed into the kitchen to fix breakfast.
L.A., 2007
"I'm gonna kill you!" came the little voice from under his desk. Angel glared at the toddler for a few seconds, then morphed into his vampiric visage, growling, trying to scare the child. But he didn't scare easily. Suddenly, Brock jumped out from under the desk and onto his lap. "Do it again, Uncle Angel. Please," the three-year-old begged him.
Anya trudged into his office, holding a manila folder. "Here's the file on Jack Ventura that you requested. There isn't much about him in there, but Kate said that she could get more if you needed it," she told him, placing it down on his desk.
Angel had to admit that since Anya had taken over for Cordelia, his clientele had expanded, he was getting paid more for his cases and he didn't have to do so much research himself. All those years working with the Scooby Gang and Willow, hacker extraordinare had obviously paid off in Anya's case. Not only did she know how to answer the phone, but she could also work the computer and she was a real hard ass when it came time for the clients to pay up. Then again, so was Cordelia.
She looked at her son. "Is he bothering you? I can take him into the other room if ya want," she told him. Normally, Brock would go to daycare while she was at work, but since he was recovering chicken pox, she'd to keep him at home. Besides, with him there, it kept Angel busy.
Angel shook his head as Brock reached out to touch his fangs. The child was very curious when it came to vampires. Xander was strict when it came to him vamping out in front of Brock, but Brock seemed to like it. "Nah. He's fine. We were about to play Power Rangers. Weren't we, Brock?"
Brock nodded his head, jumping off Angel's lap. Anya watched as Angel's face turned back into that of the handsome young man that he once had been. "Okay, well, be good, Brock," she told her son before she headed into the main office. She'd just sat back down at the desk when she heard Brock say, "No, Angel that's not how you shoot the blasto gun!"
She laughed as she returned to organizing the demon data bank files on the computer. She had just got to "D" in the alphabet when Xander and Wesley breezed into the office, out of breath. "Well?" she asked, looking up at them.
"Another boy," Wesley said.
"How's Cordelia taking the news?" Anya asked them, saving what she'd just done before the computer froze up. As soon as she finished saving, that's exactly what it did. Sighing, she rebooted the demonic device.
"Not good, actually," Xander told her. "She's threatening to castrate Doyle if she doesn't have a daughter."
Anya shrugged her shoulders. "I don't see what the big deal is about having a girl. I mean they have hair to play with and you can buy them dolls and put them in little dresses and…Xander *I* want a daughter!" she said.
Wesley leaned toward Xander. "See, look what you did."
The door to Angel's office flew open, Brock running out, yelling, "Ah! He's gonna shoot me! He's gonna shoot me!" Then, Angel came out wearing a mask and a cape holding a plastic water gun, looking absolutely ridiculous. He stopped when he noticed Xander and Wesley standing there, gawking at him.
Wesley and Xander couldn't help but laugh. Anya, used to the games that Angel played with Brock, just smiled. "Um, Angel, are you going to help Batman? Are you the new Batboy?" Xander couldn't help but criticize. "Where is the Batmobile? Where is the bat signal? Where is crusty old Alfred?" Xander asked, then, turning to Wesley, "There he is!"
Both ex-Watcher and vampire looked at him incredulously. "Sorry," he apologized. "I couldn't help myself. You do understand that you look totally ridiculous, don't you?" he asked Angel.
As much as he hated Angel when he was with Buffy, over the years he had come to accept Angel. He'd no choice but to accept him once Anya volunteered to work for him so Cordy could take time off. He'd held just much resentment toward Angel as Buffy and Riley had after what had happened when he'd reverted. But if Buffy could push it to the back of her mind and befriend Angel, then so could he.
Angel shed the cape and the mask, draping them over a chair. "Yes, I know. Look, since I can't have kids, I play with yours and Brock and I have a lot in common. He likes to play, I get bored. He keeps the boringness of this business slightly less boring."
"So, how's Cordy?" he asked.
"Well, fourteen hours of labor, another screaming baby with a penis, she's just peachy," Xander said sarcastically. They'd been hearing for the last nine months how this baby was definitely going to be a girl. Cordelia had wanted a daughter since the twins had come out as boys. Declaring that it was mother's instinct, she would not deny that the baby was a girl. And when it came out a boy, she had screamed and hollered or so Doyle had told them.
Angel winced. "Another boy? Oh, God. Doyle's ecstatic, I bet," Angel said, scooping Brock into his arms when the toddler ran into his legs. The door swung open. The two twin Doyle's ran into the office and immediately tackled Wesley.
"Oh, look, if it isn't the mini Cordoyles," Wesley said as he lifted Kyle into his arms as he looked down at Evan. He caught the look that Cordelia threw him, cradling the new baby in her arms, Doyle at her side.
"Would you get away! I am not impotent. I just had a baby. I can walk and do things by myself. Shoo, now little man. Go, shoo!" she told Doyle who looked at her and immediately distanced himself from his wife.
Standing beside Angel and Xander he shook his head. "See, you should know better than to get her pregnant. You'd think after the first pregnancy, you'd learn your lesson, but no, you decided shagging her is better," Xander said, making a face. All those years around Spike and his lingo had rubbed off onto him.
"So what's his name?" Anya asked her.
"Huh? Oh. Conner."
"Conner?"
Cordelia nodded. "Yeah. I named him after my cousin. He died when I was fifteen. I think it was because of his death that I became such a bitch. I mean, I was nice when he was alive, then again, maybe it was all the little people I was surrounded by."
"So, are we going out to dinner or what?" Wesley asked them. He was the only sane person among the group. He could have said Angel was sane, but that thought left his mind the moment Angel came out of his office dressed as Robin, Boy Wonder. They gathered the children then they headed out for dinner.
Sunnydale, 2000
Buffy lay awake, staring into Mr. Gordo's black button eyes. Riley had asked her if she had wanted to go back to his apartment with him, but she said that they'd gone through all the trouble in fixing up her room so she wanted to at least sleep one night in it. And that little lie did hold a little bit of truth.
More so was that she didn't want to be alone with him until she could figure out what the dreams and visions she kept having meant. In the past week, they'd gotten more realistic to the point that they had started to scare her.
Everytime she blinked or closed her eyes she had a flash and just in the past three days they had started to frighten her to the point where she couldn't sleep. In the last one, she had actually seen one of her friend's die.
She turned on her side, staring at her digital clock. It was one o'clock. She closed her eyes once more, hoping that she wouldn't see anything, but the moment her lids closed, she had a flash: the twins were running around being chased by two other children, twin boys.
No! She kicked back the blankets. She needed to talk to somebody. She didn't care who it was. This had gone on long enough. There had to be some cause for this. Something had to be behind these little trips to the future. If it was the future. She quickly dressed, grabbed her keys and was out the door.
Fifteen minutes later Buffy was pacing in front of Giles' door. She had no idea what she was doing there. After what had been happening over the course of the week, the visions that she'd been having suddenly got worse. She started seeing things that just couldn't be figments of her imagination.
She actually saw herself marrying Riley and seeing that really scared her. She had been avoiding spending time alone with him. What was she supposed to say to him? I love you, but knowing that we're married in a future life scares the hell out of me. She just didn't know how to talk to him about that. She had tried to sleep, but it just didn't come. The moment she had closed her eyes, visions had hit her like a freight train.
She had actually seen Kevin dying. How was she to explain that? She had never seen anyone die. Well, she'd seen people die in the sense that she'd watched it, but never had she ever like seen it before it happened. That was totally different from any of the prophetic dreams she'd had before.
"Why are you stalking Giles' apartment?" a voice asked from behind her. Buffy spun around, stake at the ready to find Spike standing there.
"Oh, good, it's just you," Buffy said with a sigh of relief. The last she needed was some nosy neighbor wondering what she was doing out this late at night at Giles house just standing outside his door.
Spike took his cigarettes from his pocket, lit one, and then just stood, staring at blondie as he took a drag. "So, here you are at Giles' standing in front of his door. How come you aren't with solider boy or going inside?" he asked her.
Buffy shrugged. "Just…I have stuff on my mind that I am debating telling Giles. I just don't know what to do, Spike. It has me seriously wigged," she said, leaning against the wall.
He debated a moment or two, then he grabbed her elbow. "Come on. Let's go for a walk. Hunt some nasties and you can tell me what's gotten your panties in a bunch," he told her as they started across the parking lot. Buffy was reluctant at first, but then sighed. Who better to talk to than Spike?
Sunnydale, 2000, Westing Cemetery
They'd been hunting for a little over an hour in silence. Spike was content to give her time, but he was almost out of cigarettes and he wasn't good at being 'Silent Joe'. So, he finally spoke. "So, you gonna tell me what's bothering you or what? Cuz I don't fancy walking in silence until dawn…I do combust into a pile of dust, you know."
She stopped in her tracks. Spying a bench, she walked to it and sat down. Moments later, Spike joined her, stretching his arm behind her. "I've been having these…visions, Spike. Pain in the ass visions. When I'm awake, when I try to go to sleep. Just little flashes, but visions nonetheless. They plague my every thought, my every breath. I don't know what they mean and it scares me," she said, pausing to take a breath.
He could tell that the Slayer was scared. He had never seen Buffy like this. She had been scared when she'd been forced to battle Angelus, but that had been fear out of killing her beloved Angel. This was different, though. "What are the visions about? Forthcoming evil? Is something bad going to happen?" he asked her.
"There's nothing evil at all about them," she said, jumping off the bench. Staring up at the dark sky she said, "They're future flashes. I've seen my children, my husband. I've watched my friend's get married." She turned around, her face softening, her lips curling into a smile. "I've seen you get married."
Spike huffed at the thought of being married. At one time he thought he would marry Dru, but that went out the window when Angel reverted. Now, he barely thought about her. "How do you know these visions are real? Your mind can be playing tricks on you, ever thought about that?" he asked her.
Buffy ran a hand through her hair. "That's just it, Spike. I don't know anything. They just started happening a few weeks ago. What am I supposed to think? The first thing I saw was two children calling me Mommy. After that all logical thought left my brain."
"Maybe there's some demon that's making you see the future. It could be trying to make you go insane. Didn't that happen before? Or something of the sort?" he asked her.
She nodded. "Yeah, its blood mixed with mine and I was psychic. This is different, though, Spike. I am *seeing* the future. I've seen one of Riley's friend's die. I've seen Angel revert! Get what I am telling you!" she yelled at him.
Putting his hands on her arms, he tried to calm her. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Maybe Giles can be of some help. C'mon," he said. Grabbing her hand, he led her out of the cemetery back toward Giles'.
Sunnydale, 2007
"Kennedy, grab me the eggs from the refrigerator," Riley told his daughter. He had to admit that the twins were very helpful when it came to fixing Buffy breakfast. They loved their mother and they always wanted to see her happy. The same went for him. He remembered when they'd made him breakfast in bed. Toast and eggs. Plain bread and raw eggs. He had cherished that breakfast. Buffy hadn't helped them at all. They had insisted fixing their Daddy's breakfast by themselves so she'd let them, apologizing to him for the lack of cooked.
He watched as she opened the refrigerator to grab the carton of eggs. She'd just grabbed the eggs when Logan ran in chasing Shadow, running straight into Kennedy, making her drop the carton. She looked up at Riley with those soft green eyes of hers and immediately burst into tears.
Riley fussed Logan as he scooped Kennedy into his arms. "Shh! It's okay, Princess. It was only eggs. It's okay. Shh! Stop crying," he lulled her, stroking her back and kissing her hair softly.
Then, over Kennedy's blonde curls he saw Buffy walk into the room. Her hair was messy, her eyes were still hazy with sleep, but he could not remember her being ever the more beautiful; except after they'd made love. There was something about seeing her naked, her beautiful body glistening with sweat, her chest heaving from orgasm that made her seem so much more attractive. Maybe it was just a hormonal male thing.
Though, they hadn't made love in months. He'd tried numerous times. He tried to seduce her with expensive wine and jewelry and a candlelit dinner, but Buffy would always know what he had been up to. After being married to him for six years, she'd come to know when he was up to something.
He stood there, still trying to get Kennedy to stop crying, staring at her. Her pajama pants were loose on her tiny body, but her tank top clung tightly to her chest, showing how perky her breasts were. She must've noticed him staring at her for she pulled her robe tighter around her body, smiling at him. "What's going on in here?" she asked, surveying the messy kitchen. He looked around. Uh-oh! If there was one thing she didn't like it was waking up to a messy kitchen. Buffy did not like to have a messy house. Years under her mother's surveillance taught her that.
Logan took that as opportunity to make his presence known to her. "We were trying to cook you breakfast," Logan said from his spot on the floor beside the pile of broken eggs that the dogs were sniffing.
After shooing Jasper and Shadow out the door, Buffy squatted down so that she was eye level with her son who knew that he was in trouble. "Did you do all this?" she asked him.
He nodded. "But Kennedy dropped them."
Suddenly, Kennedy stopped sobbing long enough to look up and yell, "You ran into me," before burrowing her head in the crook of Riley's neck, sobs still wracking her tiny little body.
Buffy walked to the cabinet, grabbed the trashcan and cleaning supplies and helped Logan start to clean it up. That's when Riley grabbed her hand, forcing her to her feet. "No, I'll do it," he told her. He handed Kennedy to her, then squatted down to clean up the mess their children had made.
Buffy sat Kennedy on the counter, wiping her daughter's tears away. "Stop crying, darling. It's okay. It was just eggs. Nothing to cry about. Daddy can go out afterwhile and buy some more," she told the child.
Kennedy listened intently, nodding. "But…but we were making you breakfast. Daddy wanted to bring you breakfast in bed and I was helping him," she explained to her mother.
"Well, that's good that you were helping Daddy, then. But Daddy shouldn't have made you get the eggs for him. He's a big boy. He could've gotten them himself," she said, turning around to look at Riley.
Riley glared up at her. "She wanted to help. I let her. Usually you bit…usually you complain when I don't let them help," he reminded her. At least he hadn't cursed in front of the children. They had learned their lesson ! about doing that when Logan went through a stage, calling everyone that he knew a shithead.
"But when they do help and there's an accident one of them wind up doing this," she said, gesturing to the child in front of her who was still rubbing her teary eyes. She hated to see her children cry, but both of them were tenderhearted and spoiled. Whenever they did anything wrong, they broke into sobs and whenever they wanted their way, they cried. It worked on her, but Riley was stricter. He didn't let them get by with as much as she did.
Finally, there were no more remnants of the eggs on the floor. Standing up, Riley threw the dishcloth into the sink as he walked to his wife and Kennedy. "They're children, Buffy. They are going to cry at one time or another."
She felt his arms circle her waist, his breath on her neck. She kept her back to him, still looking straight at her daughter who had stopped crying and was now watching the two of them with a smile. "I know that, Riley, but I still don't like them helping out with stuff like that. They are still young and their feelings get hurt easily."
Buffy slipped out of his embrace, lifting Kennedy off the counter. "Go into the living room, sweetie," she instructed her. Before she could turn around, Riley had her backed into the refrigerator. She looked into his desire filled eyes as his hand traveled up her body. "What do you think you're doing?" she asked him as he nuzzled her neck, his hand cupping her breast through the soft fabric of her tank top.
He answered by plundering her mouth with his. It was the sweetest kiss and she sunk into it immediately, wrapping her arms around his neck to pull him closer. It had been a long time since they had been together, sexually and otherwise. After all the hell she'd gone through in the past six months, Riley had been patient with her. He had made several attempts to make love to her, but she had shirked every single one.
And why had she done that? Because six months before she had been pregnant with their child. If it hadn't been for the horrid thunderstorm and the drunk driver that hit her the night she'd come home from spending the weekend with Giles and her mom, she would still be pregnant. She would be on maternity leave from her job, anticipating the new baby, but no, that had been abruptly taken from her.
The week of the accident, they'd gotten word from Stephanie that Riley's dad had had a heartattack so she encouraged him to go to Huxley. He hadn't wanted to leave her but she'd insisted. She told him that she would be fine and that she was going to San Francisco that weekend. Riley hadn't even been in town when she'd lost the baby.
The doctor had told her if it hadn't been for her wearing her seatbelt, she could have suffered a worse fate. "Be lucky that it was only the baby you were carrying that was harmed, Miss Finn." When he'd said 'were', her whole world had come tumbling down. She and Riley had wanted a baby for so long. They had been trying for years and then one day she found out that God had graced them with another child.
The hospital had kept her for a day just to make sure everything was okay, then she had been released. Returning home had been one of the worse things. Riley had left her a message the night before saying that he'd told his parents about the new baby and that they were ecstatic. After that she had been an emotional wreck. Then, Riley had gotten back from Iowa.
She remembered that day as if it was yesterday. He had found her curled on the sofa, staring blankly out the window. He sat down beside her declaring that he was home. All she had said was 'Oh that's nice'. Immediately, he had known there was something wrong. He had tried to wrap his arms around her. She had let him for a few seconds, then the knowledge of the miscarriage set in and she pushed him away. She had locked herself in their bedroom the rest of that day, crying. He had let her be, too, respecting her feelings. Then, unable to be patient with her! any longer, he'd unlocked the door, demanding to know what was wrong.
So, she simply blurted it out. The look on Riley's face had been so tragic. She had taken all the blame for losing the baby. At once Riley told her that it hadn't been her fault as she expected he would and when she tried to push him away, he only clung on tighter to her. She had loved him for that. He hadn't let her burden herself with the guilt of losing the baby. When she'd calmed down days later, she'd asked him if he blamed her and he simply said the only person to blame was the drunken guy driving the car. He had said that the baby was important to him, but it hadn't gotten to be as important to him as she and the twins had.
She had finally started to get past the miscarriage when Riley suggested that they try again. Offhandedly she had argued with him, asking if he was trying to replace one lost with another. She hadn't known why she'd said it, but she had. After she'd thrown out that accusation, he had stormed out. He'd returned late that night, drunk. She apologized for what she'd said and he apologized for storming out. Then, he made one simple request: he asked her to make love to him, but she refused. It was too soon after the baby, she'd told him.
Now, all there was, was Riley. Riley's lips, Riley's arms, Riley's tongue. Oh, God, his tongue. What she remembered that he could do with that tongue. Her hands flattened against his chest as if wanting to push him away, but she didn't want to. No, if anything she wanted to pull him closer and beg him to make love to her. Half a year she'd gone without him and she missed it. She missed the feel of him driving her to orgasm…just the feel of him period.
Unable to stop herself, she wrapped a leg around Riley, lifting herself so that he was now supporting the majority of her weight. His hand moved from her breast to support her bottom as her fingers moved into his hair. "Riley…" Buffy moaned, "I want you…I need you…" she moaned into his mouth. Riley mad! e the mistake of leaning back too much, which made him propel them backward onto the tile floor.
His back hit the floor first, his head next. "Ow!" he said as Buffy fell onto his chest, laughing hysterically. She kissed his chin, his lips, his nose, and his forehead. He had to admit that her kisses were making the throbbing in his head stop. He was more worried about the throbbing part of him that his wife was currently sitting on.
"I'm sorry, honey," she whispered in his ear. Her lips returned to his, lingering there for a few moments before she leaned back, staring into his eyes, smiling. "So, what do you have planned for today? Sundays are always our lazy days since neither of us have to work."
His face grew serious. His beautiful smile faded and his usually clear blue eyes darkened. "Well, my breakfast for you was ruined so I'd say the day got off to a pretty bad start," he said, angrily.
"Well, mine didn't start off so hot either, buddy," she told him, running her fingers playfully through his dirty blonde hair. When he asked why, she simply answered, "Because when I woke up this morning, I was in bed alone. You've been my lifeline lately Riley, helping me get through this anniversary all by myself and last night…last night was the first night I was able to sleep peacefully," she said, scrambling to her feet. She held out a hand to help him up as well.
He caressed her cheek lightly. "I know that not having all of your friends here has been hard on you. I know that me and the twins can't make up for that loss, but we are all you have left, Buffy."
If looks could kill, Buffy would be a widow. The look she had just given him since tremors of regret up and down his body. Something he had said had not set too well with her. "I can't believe you just said that. You and the twins are the best things that ever happened to me. I've survived without Willow and the gang for years, Riley, but you know better than anybody that it gets worse around this time of year. ! I won't stand here and tell you that it doesn't hurt not having the Scooby Gang together because it does. But I'm a big girl. I have a husband and two children to take care of and my friends aren't as important as those three. You, Logan and Kennedy are my life, Riley, I wouldn't trade you three for anything."
He was leaning in to kiss her when the twins ran into the kitchen, Kennedy screaming, "Ah! Mom, help!" as Logan chased her, a pair of Riley's boxers on his head. Buffy couldn't help but laugh at the site, but Riley looked less than thrilled.
He snatched his underwear from his son's head, instructing him back into the living room, noticing that Kennedy was standing between he and Buffy, yanking on her pajama pants. "Mom, are we still going visit Cordy?" Kennedy asked her.
Buffy looked wearily at Riley, then back down at her daughter. "I don't know. We'll see now go back in the living room," she told her daughter as she turned back to Riley. After all those years ago, he still held some resentment toward Angel about everything that had happened. She did, too, but Cordelia was one of her friends and she'd just had a baby and she'd promised to go see it. Besides, the twins had been yanking her leg to go see Xander and Brock.
She watched as Riley jumped on the cabinet. "So, you were going to L.A. today? That's nice," he said. He knew that she occasionally went to L.A. to visit Cordy or Xander and that since Anya worked for Angel now that she had probably seen him. It was inevitable. He couldn't expect her to go to L.A. and not see him. But he couldn't hold a grudge against Angel forever. It had been Angelus, not Angel per se, who had tried to kill his children and his wife.
She nodded. "Yeah. She just had a baby and I promised that I would stop by and see it. Besides, the twins have been wanting to see Evan and Kyle and Xander invited us over to his and Anya's house for dinner."
"I don't want this to seem that I don't want you to go, but it's not going to be! weird going see Cordy with a new baby, knowing that you could be in her situation right now. Have you thought about that?" he asked her.
She turned away from him. "Yes, I've thought about it, but I realized that I can't mourn this forever. I figure that our baby is in a better place right now. It's away from the danger and harshness of this world, living in a pure, dangerfree zone. Any mother would want that for her child."
Hearing her voice begin to crack, he pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry that we couldn't have another chance at having a child. Maybe it just wasn't the right time. But it will happen, Buffy. We will have another child."
Buffy leaned back, looking deep into his eyes, saying, "For us to have a child, we have to make love, Riley. This isn't like the fairytales that I read Logan and Kennedy. The stork can't just come drop one off at our door. We have to start trying again," she said, pausing, seeing his jaw flinch. "Why won't you make love to me?"
It was a fair question he guessed. For those few weeks right after the miscarriage he had tried, but all his attempts to take her pain away with intimacy had been all shredded and discarded into the trashcan. Sometimes, enough is enough. He gave up trying. He began sleeping on his side of the bed, giving her the space she needed. Last night was the first time in six long months that she'd slept in his arms and he couldn't begin to describe how good it felt.
Her question hit his heart a little too hard that he felt that he'd been punched in the stomach a few times and all the wind had been knocked out of him. Meeting her curious green eyes he told her, "Buffy, I have wanted to for so long. It's not that I won't, it's that I couldn't. Everytime I tried to touch you, you pushed me away. I couldn't deal with that anymore so I backed off. I figured you would tell me when you were ready."
She was about to open her mouth when he continued. "Besides, you thought that I was only making love to you so that! I could get you pregnant. You thought that I actually wanted to replace the child that we had lost. It wasn't just a part of you that died, you know, that baby was a part of me, too." He hadn't meant for it to come out like it had sounded. He made it come out so cold and heartless.
She leaned forward, kissing him softly. "I'm sorry, Riley. I'm sorry for pushing you away and keeping you away. I'm sorry about the baby and that I shut you out of grieving with me," she said, burying her head in his lap. Before her crying could reach the living room, he pulled her up, kissing her into silence that was until Kennedy started screaming from the living room.
"Daddy! Mommy! Logan tore off Miss Daisy's head! Logan stop!" she yelled, then she ran into the kitchen, holding her doll's body in one hand and the doll's head in the other, tears streaming down her rosy cheeks.
Buffy turned around to face her daughter, scooping her up in her arms. "What happened?" she asked, setting Kennedy on the counter beside Riley. She choked through her sobs so every once in a while they'd catch a word, "…he…Jasper…pulled off head…kicked…" She looked at Riley, hoping that he had caught some of what she'd said, but he just shrugged his shoulders.
"Kennedy, calm down and tell Mommy what happened," Buffy told her as Riley yelled for Logan to come into the kitchen. Buffy picked Logan up, putting him on the cabinet beside his sister. "Now, I want to know what happened or you will both go stay with Mister Reese while Daddy and I go visit Cordy and Xander."
Then the twins exchanged looks pointing at the other, Logan declared that Kennedy started it and vice versa. Buffy walked to the phone as if she was going to dial their next door neighbor when the twins suddenly decided to come clean. "Kennedy kept singing that stupid song from the mermaid movie while I was trying to watch Franklin," Logan explained.
Kennedy stuck her tongue out at Logan after saying, "I was not singing and that song is not st! upid. You're stupid!"
Buffy was about to open her mouth to issue out a punishment when Riley cut in. "Alright, you two, I have had it. You two are going to go sit down and eat breakfast then you are going to go straighten up the mess you made in the living room and then for the next hour you will stay in your room with each other. If you're not getting along by then you will not come with your mother and I to L.A. Got it?" he asked his children. Both nodded earnestly before they climbed off the cabinet. Obediently, they went to the table, sitting down quietly.
As Riley poured Fruit Loops into the two bowls for them he told Logan, "Since you broke your sister's doll, she gets to break one of your toys."
"But Dad…" he started to protest.
"No 'but Dads' Logan. It's an eye for an eye in this house," he told his son as he pushed Logan's bowl of cereal to him. Then, he turned to Kennedy. "You can pick out any one of Logan's toys to destroy."
"Even that stupid firetruck that Uncle Xander gave him that makes all the noise?" she asked Riley.
He stared at her for a few moments. Her green eyes were bright, glinting with that mischievousness that Buffy's eyes got when she was up to no good. "Even the stupid firetruck that Uncle Xander gave him that makes all the noise," he repeated.
Kennedy clapped her hands happily, a beautiful smile warming her face. "Yes!" she said, then turning to Logan teased, and "I get to break your firetruck I get to break your firetruck."
"Kennedy," Buffy warned her daughter, as she rummaged through the refrigerator. She didn't know why it was that when one of her children got in trouble, the other just loved to rub it in and usually they only did that when Riley was home.
Without another word, Kennedy began digging into her cereal, getting glares from her twin at the opposite side of the table. Riley moved back to Buffy who handed him a glass of orange juice. She reached into a cabinet beside the refrigerator, extracting! a bag of white powdered donuts, watching at how Riley's face lit up, questioningly. "I bought them yesterday at the grocery store and hid them from you," she said, poking him in the stomach.
Riley took a sip of his orange juice, then laid it back on the counter, wrapping his arms around her to pull her close. "That was mean, Buffy, to hide that from me. We both know that I like the sweet stuff," he whispered, "after all, I did marry you."
His lips brushed across hers briefly, but being interrupted by Kennedy and Logan who announced that they were finished, asking to get up from the table, halted any attempts he had to further engage it. "Go clean up the mess that you made in the living room, then upstairs to your room," Riley told them.
He was about to kiss Buffy again when he felt a small presence behind him. He turned around, finding Kennedy standing behind him. He squatted down so that he was eyelevel with his daughter. "Yes, Kennedy, may I help you?"
She bit down on her bottom lip then asked, "Where did the baby go?" Riley looked at Buffy, at a loss for words that their daughter had asked this now, so long after Buffy had lost the baby.
Buffy pulled Kennedy into her arms, placing her on the counter. "Why do you ask?" she asked her daughter.
Kennedy shrugged her shoulders. "Well, because when you told us that we were going to have a little brother or sister, you were happy and then you told us that it was gone so I was wondering where it went."
Buffy stepped away from her daughter, running her hands over her face, through her hair. What more could she do? She didn't know how to handle a situation like this. When she had gotten pregnant and told the twins about the new baby, she had expected to carry it to term, not lose it.
"Honey, why are you asking this now?" Riley asked Kennedy, wiping away the child's tears. She rubbed her eyes with a balled up fist as her parents stared down at her, wondering where this inquisition had come from.
"B-because Mommy is happy again. I didn't want to ask when Mommy was unhappy…" she told them.
Riley watched as Buffy's eyes widened. She took one last look at both he and Kennedy before running out of the room. A few moments later he heard her feet on the stairs, then a door slammed shut. He winced, then became aware of Kennedy's cries. "Daddy, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" she started. Riley pulled his daughter into his arms, cradling her against his chest, but all he could think about was Buffy.
He held her tighter to his chest. "Mommy is okay, baby. Don't worry about her. She's going to be fine. She's going to be fine," he told her, trying to convince himself that she was going to.
Sunnydale, 2000
They were about two blocks from Giles' when Buffy realized that she wasn't ready to tell anyone else especially Giles. Giles would only make a big stink about it and she didn't want anything like that. Grabbing Spike's arm, she pulled him to a stop. "I can't do this, Spike. I'll find another way to stop these visions. I just can't tell Giles yet."
"Buffy, you have to tell him. You have to tell someone. I'm not into all that majick stuff so I wouldn't be a big bunch of help, but I know that these things are not high on your favorites list."
"I'll figure it out on my own, Spike. Just don't tell anyone what I told you."
"I…"
"If you tell anyone I will put a stake through your heart. That's not a threat; it's a promise. Promise me that this will stay between the two of us."
Spike knew that the Slayer would keep good on her promise to stake him so, reluctantly, he obliged to keep her secret. He stood in the darkness, watching as she disappeared into the dark of night.
Buffy got home that morning to find Willow, Riley, Graham and Xander, sitting in the living room of her apartment, obviously worried. They all stood up the second she burst through the door. "Where have you been?" Willow asked.
She looked at Riley who didn't look at all happy with her. Since his return, things between them hadn't been all that great. They had tried to get back what they'd had before he left, but she didn't feel that they could. Plus, there's was something about his entire demeanor that told her that something had happened in Huxley that Riley wasn't telling her about. She couldn't expect him to tell her what he was hiding since she hadn't told anyone about her dreams.
She pulled off her black jacket as she walked into the kitchen, prying herself out of their auspicious gazes. "I couldn't sleep so I went for a walk. Is that so wrong?" she asked them, realizing that they had followed her.
As she threw open the refrigerator, she was overcome with another vision: She and Riley were sitting across from one another at a table. Riley was telling her that she couldn't change what happened. "It's done, Buffy. We have to move past it," he told her. She jumped up from her chair, her eyes red and puffy from crying. "I will not move past it, Riley. You might be able to, but I can't. I'm sorry, but I can't just forget!"
Buffy grabbed her head. "Stop! I can't take it anymore…Stop! Please stop!" she yelled, sinking to the floor. She pulled her legs close to her chest, resting her head on her knees. It was getting too unbearable for her. She had to find out what these visions were about before they drove her insane.
Her friends gathered around her, exchanging looks of concern. Willow touched Buffy's hair softly. "Buffy, what's wrong? What can't you take anymore?" she asked her best friend.
Buffy looked up at her, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I can't do this, Willow. They're...they've taken over. I can't do anything without being overwhelmed by one of them. I just don't know what to do," she told Willow. Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, she asked, "Will you help me?"
Xander and Graham helped her to her feet since Riley was too paralyzed to do anything but stand there and stare at Buffy. They guided her into the living room, sitting her on the sofa. Graham got her a cup of tea while Willow was still trying to calm Buffy.
Buffy's head was resting in Willow's lap as Willow smoothed back her hair. "Buffy, for me to help you I need to know what this is all about. What is going on that has you so scared?"
Graham came back into the room, holding a cup of herbal tea, handing it to Buffy. As he did so, she was overcome by a feeling of déjà vu. He'd handed her a cup of tea one night when Riley hadn't come home from patrol. She'd been stuck home with the twins since her son was running fever; Riley had decided to go patrol with Jules.
But he hadn't returned. She had stayed up all night worrying about him. Graham, Willow and Xander had come over the next morning to assure her that he was okay. Graham had brewed a cup of tea and was handing it to her just as Riley ambled through the door, his leg in a cast, his face bruised.
Taking the cup from Graham it fell to the floor, shattering into pieces. She shook her head dismissively. "No, no, no! Willow, make them stop! Make them stop! Please, make them stop!" she yelled. Then, her eyes focused on Riley and the way that he was looking at her. "Stop looking at me like that. I am not paraplegic, you know. I can do things on my own. I am tired of you treating me like a damn China doll!" she yelled.
What was happening to her? Riley wondered as he listened to her. He had no idea why she'd said what she just did, but in the last fifteen minutes the girl that he knew and loved was nowhere to be seen. The Buffy that he saw now resembled that of a frightened regular girl. That's what scared him the most.
Suddenly Buffy bolted off the sofa, making her way towards Riley. "You think you know how it feels. Well, you don't. Let's see you have a miscarriage and let's see how you feel. It isn't so great. You weren't here when it happened. You were off in Iowa. You left me all by myself, leaving me to deal with it by myself. Now you want me to pretend that it never happened? I can't do that. That baby was a part of me…and a part of me died right along with it…" she told him.
They were all frozen in place at Buffy's last outburst. The same thoughts were running through their minds: Buffy had been pregnant? None of them had known. She'd had a miscarriage while Riley was in Iowa. It would make sense since she and Riley hadn't been on common ground since he returned.
Graham walked toward Buffy, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Buffy," he said softly, willing her around. When she looked up at him, her green eyes were clouded with uncertainty and confusion.
"Graham? What are you doing here?" she asked, wrapping her arms around him. "God, it's been years. I've missed you," she whispered to him. She leaned back, looking into his blue eyes. "Where's Willow? And where are those two children? I want to see how big Nick has gotten? And Georgina! I haven't seen her. Where are they?" she asked him.
Graham looked worriedly at Willow and Xander who had been listening and watching the scene in awe. "Buffy, Willow is right there," he pointed out. "Who is Nick and Georgina?" he asked her.
"Oh, you silly, silly, man," she said, laughing softly, pinching his cheek. "Always the kidder. C'mon, where are they? I want to see them, Graham. Where are your kids? You brought them didn't you?" she asked. Her eyes wide, "You didn't leave them in Mississippi, did you?" she asked.
Graham looked from Riley to Willow. "Willow, what is going on? What is happening to her?" Graham asked Willow as Buffy's eyes focused on Xander. She slowly made her way to him, cupping his cheek.
"Xander. My Xander. Did you come with Willow and Graham? Why didn't you bring Anya and Brock? You know I wanted to see them. We were supposed to go last weekend to visit you, but Kennedy wasn't feeling good so we stayed home. I'm sorry."
Graham stepped closer to Willow. "What is happening to her, Will? This isn't Buffy, is it?" he asked wearily.
She shook her head, her eyes holding the same worry as Graham's. "No, I'm afraid it isn't. And I'm not exactly sure who it is," she said, stepping toward Buffy and Xander. "But whoever it is knows all of us."
Xander decided to play along with her. "Sorry to disappoint, Buff, but I left them at home. You know how Anya gets. Sometimes she just doesn't want to cooperate with me. And Brock, well, he…he was, uh…" he trailed off, unable to come up with a good lie.
"S'okay, Xander. You know how much I love to see him, but it's okay that you didn't bring him. I understand," she finished, then suddenly she stepped back from Xander, wrenching her hand from his cheek. "What is going on?" she asked.
Willow stepped in front of her. "That's what we'd like to know, Buffy. Are you on drugs? Is that with all this is about? Are you high?" Willow asked. That was the only explanation that she could come up with.
Buffy stared at Willow for the longest time, then, to everyone's surprise, she laughed. She thought the situation was funny. Not ha-ha hilarious funny, but funny as in…oh, she could debate this for the longest damn time, but the fact of the matter being high would be much funner than what was happening in actuality. "High?" she repeated. "No, Will, I am not high, but considering, I wish I was."
"Buffy, please, tell us what is going on. We can't help you unless we know," Willow said, becoming more outraged and alarmed at her best friend's hindrance of her current situation.
The four of them watched as Buffy walked to the French doors that led out onto the back patio where the pool was throwing them open, welcoming the fresh night breeze into the room. "Maybe there is a drug that can cure this. Maybe if I take something, I'll be too high to realize what they're doing. Maybe I wouldn't even realize that I'm having a flash until I pass out. I mean, it would cure it momentarily."
"What are you babbling about, Buffy? Flashes? Cure what momentarily?" Xander asked her. He hadn't been too thrilled to be yanked out of his bed at three o'clock in the morning to be welcomed by Buffy's brush with the crazy.
She took a deep breath, then the words just rolled off her tongue. "I've been having these visions. They just started a few weeks ago, but everytime I blink everytime I touch something or someone or hear a certain phrase, the visions are triggered. And I star in the freak show."
"What are the visions about?" Riley asked, finally making his presence known.
Buffy turned around to the sound of his voice. "What do you mean 'what is this about?' This is about you staying out until all hours of the night with your buddies. We have two children to care for and lately I have been the only one taking care of said children. I won't have them grow up asking me why their mommy and daddy no longer sleep together. I won't do that, Riley. You have two choices here: Keep this up and risk losing us or stop this and keep us. It's your choice."
Riley exchanged looks with Willow who just shook her head. "The visions, they're about…well they're centered around my life or my future life as I've come to think. I'm married, I have children…I know that they can't be figments of my imagination because my imagination couldn't drudge up some of the things that I've seen. I don't think it's that powerful."
"What kind of things exactly have you seen, Buffy?" Willow asked.
"I've seen people die, get married, have children. But yet I've seen parts of my life or whatever this is that I have been seeing that I could've done without seeing," she told them. Then turning to Willow asked, "Can you stop them? Is there a spell or something that could do it?"
"Let me see what I can find. Um, Graham, come with me. I may need your help reaching some of my books," she said and when he was about to object, grabbed his shirt, pulling him with her down the hall.
Buffy left the two men alone in the living room as she walked out onto the back patio. She sat on the ledge of the pool, rolled up her pants, dangling her feet in the water. She felt the two men's presence behind her, but she ignored them. She just prayed that Willow would be able to find something that could help her because if the visions didn't stop soon, she was afraid of what she would do just to make sure she didn't see another one ever again.
Sunnydale, 2007
"Daddy, is Mommy ever going to come down?" Kennedy asked Riley. He had been so busy staring out the window that he didn't even hear Kennedy sneak up behind him. He turned his attention to his daughter, pulling her up onto his lap.
"I'm sure she is, Princess. Mommy's just…Mommy's just not feeling herself lately. She'll be okay, though. At least I hope so," he said as the phone rang. He pushed Kennedy off his lap as he headed into the kitchen to grab the phone.
"Hello?" he answered.
"Riley? It's Emmy. Is Buffy there?" Riley recognized the voice immediately as Buffy's friend from the hospital, Emmy Webster. When Buffy had first started working at the hospital, Emmy had been pretty much the only one on staff to show Buffy her hospitality, but once the rest of the hospital got to know Buffy, they all became to love her as quickly as he and Emmy had.
"Uh, yeah. Hold on a sec," Riley told her. He put the phone down, then walking to the stairs, yelled, "Buffy! Telephone!" A few moments later she yelled back down that she had it. He thought twice about listening in, but it was a girl conversation, he assumed. So, instead he walked back into the living room and coaxed his children into playing Go Fish.
Upstairs, Buffy made her way around the bedroom as she talked to Emmy. "I thought that everything was getting better, Emmy, really I did. I thought I was getting past the miscarriage, but I guess I'm just not as strong as I used to be."
"Buffy, it has nothing to do with strength. No woman likes to lose a baby and I know that you and Riley had been trying for years to get pregnant, but I also know how much you love him. You can't push him away forever. Maybe you two need to take a vacation to reaffirm your love and your romance. That's what Matt and I did when our marriage went sour. We dropped our kids off at his parents house and we went on a six day cruise."
"How did it turn out?" Buffy asked.
"Well, we didn't leave our room for the first two days and I wound up pregnant with Ashley. I know that you wanted a baby for a long time, Buffy, but you can't let it destroy your marriage. You've pushed Riley away for so long, there's only so much a man can take before he cracks."
Buffy had to admit that Emmy did have a point. She loved Riley with all her heart, but her miscarriage was still in the front of her mind. She still blamed herself for losing the baby much to her family and Riley's dismay. "I know what you mean, Emmy, really I do…" Buffy started, but was interrupted by Emmy.
"But…Come on, I know there's a but in there somewhere."
Buffy laughed softly. "But," she said, "there's just so much that has happened between Riley and I already and besides I'm not even sure I remember how to make love to him. It's been so long!" she said, exasperated. The last time they had made love was, she believed, the night they found out that she was pregnant.
She'd had the flu for over a month and it hadn't even occurred to her that she possibly could be pregnant. When she had been vomiting every few minutes, Emmy's suspicions went into overdrive and she demanded that Buffy be tested to see exactly what was making her sick.
Emmy had taken her to one of her friends in the hospital, Doctor Hertz, and they'd had the tests done. Emmy had been at her side when the doctor had come back with the results. Emmy had been just as happy as she had been when the doctor had informed her that she was pregnant.
Emmy had been there when she'd gotten the news that she was pregnant and she'd also been there when she'd received the news that the baby was gone. After she'd heard from the doctor that the baby was gone, she had asked Emmy to take her kids home. Emmy obliged and kept Logan and Kennedy until she was released from the hospital.
"Girl, once that man is inside you, it all comes back! I don't care how long you go without it, once he touches you, it all comes back. Trust me."
Buffy couldn't help but laugh. Emmy was the only person she knew that could shake her out of her moods. "So, was this just a social call or is there a problem?"
"Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. Miss Whittier refuses to go for her therapy with Jack. She will only go if you are there. Think you can come down? I hate to ask you to come in on your day off, but she's been progressing quicker since you've been working with her and as it is I'm afraid she's going to do some real harm to Jack if you're not here soon."
"Well, I'll be there soon. I was going to stop by Doctor Merrill's office anyway. So, I'll go by the hospital then I'll stop by her office. I'll see you soon." She hung up and quickly dressed, then headed downstairs.
"Going somewhere?" Riley asked, looking up at her from his seat on the floor in front of Logan and Kennedy. He jumped up, walking into the kitchen where Buffy was scouring the cabinets and drawers looking for her keys.
"Yeah, there's a problem with one of my patients, she will only see me so I gotta get down there before she kills one of the nurses. I shouldn't be back too late, though," she told him, finally locating her car keys from beneath the newspaper.
Heading toward the door, she paused in front of the living room, staring down at her children who were wrapped up in a card game. She smiled. Go Fish was their favorite game. They had told her that it was their favorite game because she'd been the one to teach them. They tore their eyes from their game, looking up at her. "Where's Mommy going?" they asked, then Buffy realized Riley was standing directly behind her.
"Mommy has to go to work for a while," Riley told them.
"So, we're not going see Cordy or Uncle Xander?" Logan asked them.
"Not today, guys, sorry. Maybe Daddy could take you to see Uncle Spike while I am gone, though." At the mention of Spike's name they sprung up, running to Riley, wrapping their arms around his legs, begging him, "Please, Daddy, please."
"Run upstairs and get dressed and we'll see," he told them. He and Buffy stood there watching as they trampled up the stairs to their room. Turning to Buffy he asked, "Can I walk you to your car?"
"Since when do you have to ask?" she asked him, letting him take her hand. They walked outside hand in hand, not speaking. He opened the door to the Explorer for her, then closed it once she was inside. He opened his mouth to speak, but she quieted his attempt with a finger over his lips. The touch sent a tremor of need through her body. "I am sorry about this morning. I am getting over everything that has happened the past year really I am, but I blame this morning on that time of the month and I am sorry. I'll talk to Kennedy when I get back." She traced his jawline with her fingernail. "I love you, Riley." And with that, she started the car and she was gone.
Riley stood in the driveway, watching her disappear down the road. "I love you, too, Buffy. I love you, too," he whispered. He turned and walked back into the house, yelling upstairs, "If you two aren't dressed and downstairs in ten minutes were not going anywhere."
Mississippi, 2007
Willow lay in Graham's arms, her head resting on his chest, listening to the consistent drumming of his heart. She could tell that he was still awake, but she didn't want to disturb him. They had been vigorously packing for the past three days, trying to pack quickly so that they could get back to Sunnydale. She felt Graham smoothing back her hair. "Do you think that they're still together?" Graham asked, breaking the silence.
Willow looked up at him, resting an elbow on his chest, propping her head up with it. "What makes you think they wouldn't be still together? I mean, we're still together. Why wouldn't they be together? Do you know something that I don't, Graham? Because if you've talked to him and…"
He silenced her with a kiss. She wanted to protest, but it had been so long since he'd kissed her with such intensity that she didn't dare do anything to disrupt him. She became aware of his hand moving up her t-shirt. Before she knew what was happening, Graham was shedding her of her shirt. His lips moved from hers to blaze a trail of kisses down her throat.
He nipped and bit until he was pretty sure he'd given her a hickey. Usually Willow would pull away before he was able to nip once, but tonight he guessed something had changed. He'd wanted her so badly for so long. He'd hoped that night after he'd told her about his transfer that she'd let him make love to her, but all his hopes were dashed when Nick climbed into bed with them. He rolled over so that she was lying beneath him.
Staring down into those green eyes he asked, "Do you want this? If you don't then tell me because I'll stop," he told her.
"If you stop now this marriage is over," she teased him as her hands found the waistband of his boxers. "Now, you need to get out of these things," she told him. He jumped out of bed for a second to make sure the door was locked, stripped out of his boxers then joined her in the bed.
Arms outstretched, legs spread apart in open invitation for him, Graham placed himself at her entrance, but didn't make any move to thrust into her. Instead, he sunk below the sheets, parted her with his fingers and tasted her. Oh, God. Oh. My. God. He had almost forgotten how good foreplay was and with his wife…it was even better. He licked her outer lips; flicked the center then came back to tease her clit. Before long he had her bucking underneath him, moaning his name. Wanting to prolong her orgasm, he kissed his way back up to her lips, letting his tongue slip into her mouth at the same time he slipped into her tight channel.
Willow wrapped her arms around Graham's neck, pulling him closer to her chest as he thrust into her. He was hitting her every sexual peak as he had always been able to do and within moments she was coming. Graham had pulled out, then thrust back into her, hoping that would help stop her, but it didn't help. Soon after she'd come down, Graham was coming, spilling himself inside her.
He collapsed on her chest, kissing her damp forehead softly. "That was…uh, that was…" Graham was unable to form any words at the moment.
Willow put a finger over his lips. "Shh…you don't have to talk." He slid out of her, then gathered her in his arms. "Do you have any reason to believe that Buffy and Riley aren't still together?" she asked him.
"I don't know, Will. I mean, we know all the trouble they've had in the past and…I just hope we don't go back and find that our friends are divorced and living on separate ends of the city or the world or something."
There was a knock on the door. "Mommy? Daddy?" Nick's half-sleepy voice said from behind the door.
"Well, at least we finished *before* he interrupted us," Graham said, kissing Willow on the head. He slid on his boxers as Willow slid back into her nightshirt and panties. He walked to the door throwing it open to find not only Nick standing there, but Georgina was standing next to him, pacifier in her mouth, holding onto Nick's hand. Graham was about to say something when Nick looked up at him and asked, "Why did you lock the door?"
Graham picked Georgina up as Nick ran to meet Willow in the bed. "Well, it's my room. I can lock the door if I want. You can do whatever you want in your room so that goes for me as well," he told his son as he climbed back into bed.
"Mom doesn't let me lock the door. She says that people do bad stuff when doors are locked," Nick told him. Graham looked at Willow who couldn't help but smile. "Were you doing something bad?" Graham wanted to laugh. Oh, yes, I was doing something very bad, he thought, but didn't tell his child that. Besides, Nick would learn as he got older what happened behind closed doors. But he wasn't going to tell his four-year-old son what he had been doing to Willow. That was a longer conversation that he was ready for.
"No, I wasn't doing anything bad. Now, why aren't you sleeping in your bed? Your mom and I would like to sleep alone at least once in our lives," he said as Willow threw him a pair of annoyed eyes. She knew that he wanted to be able to hold her, but with two small children, their intimate time was limited.
"I can't sleep in my room. It's too empty in there. I don't like it."
"And you woke your sister up in the process?"
He shook his head. "No, when I walked by her room she was standing up in her crib so I took her out of it."
"Okay, guys. We have a long day tomorrow. Lay back and go to sleep," Willow instructed her two favorite men. If she left it up to them, they'd be arguing until the break of dawn and Graham always had to have the last word as much as Nick hated it. He always tried to get the last word, but Graham made it a priority to always get the last one. Willow fell asleep with Georgina tucked under her arm, her head on Graham's chest and Nick tucked under Graham's other arm.
Sunnydale, 2007
After Buffy had finished her session with Miss Whittier, Buffy went off in search of Emmy, finding her on the maternity floor talking to a couple who were expecting. When she saw Buffy she quickly told them bye and made her way over. "I'm sorry, they had a question about…you don't want to hear this."
"Emmy, it's fine, really. I am not going to bawl everytime I see another pregnant woman. A friend of mine just had a baby and I was supposed to go see her today, but something at home happened and then this so I couldn't go."
"What happened at home?"
"Got an hour?"
"Honey, I have all the time in the world for you," Emmy said as she led Buffy to the elevator. After Emmy clocked out, they headed out of the hospital, walking across the street to the their favorite coffee shop. After ordering their lattes, they sat down at a table in the back and Emmy immediately demanded to know what was going on. So Buffy filled her in on the groping session in the kitchen, which she oohed and ahhed over, then went on to tell her about Kennedy's question and why the child said she hadn't asked before.
"She actually said that? Oh my God. I think I would've freaked out myself. I know that you and Riley pride yourselves on letting your children not seeing you argue or unhappy so for her to come out with something like that, it's weird."
"But you know, I can't blame Kennedy. I was really…I was a real bitch to everyone after I lost the baby especially to Riley. I was bitch supreme to him. I swore to myself that after what happened all those years with his first wife and everything that I would never push him away…but I did. I feel like a shit for doing that, Emmy. I mean, here I have this wonderful, caring man and he's married to *me*. He could have absolutely any woman he wanted, but he settled for me. He took all my baggage and yet after six years he's still married to me."
"He loves you, Buffy. Riley isn't the type to stray. Even with you pushing him away, he wouldn't leave you. He *couldn't* leave you."
Buffy looked up at Emmy. She and Emmy had been friends since she'd started working at the hospital. That had been over a year ago. Emmy befriended her quickly when the rest of the hospital staff looked at her as just this insipid little girl fresh out of college. At least one of them had a good marriage.
Emmy had been married to Matt for ten years. They were high school sweethearts and married two years after graduation. She was a few years older than Buffy, but didn't look a day over twenty five. They'd had their first child two years after they were married and their other two came a few years later. She'd seen Emmy and Matt together on numerous occasions and they looked hopelessly in love. There had been a time when her friends had said the same thing about her and Riley.
"Why couldn't he leave, Emmy? If he got fed up enough, he would. Maybe he should leave. Maybe I should keep pushing him away. I certainly can't be giving him everything he wants. He'd be better off without me," she told Emmy. It was the truth, though. Riley deserved someone who could make him happy. She couldn't.
Emmy sat forward in her chair, suddenly getting very irritated with her friend. "What makes you think he'd just leave if you told him to? He wouldn't let go that easy, Buffy. He loves you and the family that you two have together way too much. I know Riley, Buffy and he doesn't give up easily especially when it's on something that he loves and you are what he loves."
Emmy could tell that Buffy was about to object so she interfered. "I don't want to hear anything more. You love your husband, he loves you. It's a love, love situation. If I hear anymore talk of you leaving him or pushing him away I am going to…I don't know exactly what I am going to do, but it'll be something bad!" Emmy threatened.
Buffy couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, then I won't talk about my marriage at all."
Emmy glanced at her watch. "Oh, shit. I totally lost track of time. I have to go pick up Justin from tee ball. I'm sorry to leave so suddenly Buffy, but Matt can't get outta work to get Justin so I promised I would."
Buffy waved it off as she slid out of her chair at the same time Emmy slid out of hers. "It's okay. I have to go to Doctor Merrill's office anyway."
"Does Riley know that you've been seeing a doctor?" Emmy asked as they headed out of the café toward their respective vehicles across the street.
Buffy shook her head. "No, he doesn't. I dodge the bullet perfectly. I always tell him that the hospital needs me, which he buys. I mean, I know sooner or later that he's going to realize that I've been spending odd amounts of money, but Riley rarely looks at the checkbook."
"You're not that bad off, Buffy. You don't need to keep seeing a shrink. They just milk you for money. Riley would tell you exactly that if he found out what you were doing and that you've been lying to him…that wouldn't sit well with him either."
"Thank you for pointing that out. I did not know that, Emmy," Buffy said sarcastically.
"I was just simply saying, Buffy. Instead of going to the doctor, think about going home and spending sometime with your husband. I think he deserves it." With that said, Emmy walked off into the parking lot.
Buffy walked found the Explorer, jumped inside and headed out of the parking lot, not sure yet where she was going. At the stoplight, she looked left, then straight, debating on which way to go. Succumbing, she knew where she had to go.