The next day dawned bright and sunny on two very tired potential movie stars.
They greeted each other in the lobby with acknowledging nods. Buffy clutched a
cup of coffee as if her life depended on it, and Spike wore sunglasses, despite
the fact that they were still indoors.
“You know you look wicked
conspicuous, right?” Buffy asked as they left the hotel for the car waiting for
them. Spike grunted absently in reply, seemingly too tired and lost in thought
to give much of a response. Buffy just shrugged and enjoyed the silence.
Today was going to be odd, to say the least. They were friends now, yes,
but the boundaries of that friendship had been tested, were constantly being
pushed, and might shatter today depending on how hot the kissing scene they were
supposed to shoot would get. It wasn’t scripted as a sexy kiss, but with them,
Lord only knew what would happen.
When they got to the set, back at the
motel, everyone was cautious around the two blondes, as if expecting them to
implode on one another at a moment’s notice. Wes, however, was overjoyed.
“Look at you two, coming in together. And in one piece, even, with all
your limbs intact and no visible scarring. I like what I see. I take it my
experiment was somewhat of a success?” Wes asked as his actors, fresh from
makeup, hair, and wardrobe, entered the set. They were to be soaked from head to
toe after coming out of the rain so their hair was wet and messy. The plan was
to pour a few buckets of water onto them before shooting started.
“We
can be in the same room together, for extended periods of time even,” Buffy told
the director, feigning pride. She shifted from foot to foot anxiously, wanting
to get this scene over with.
“Yeah. I even got her up on stage last
night and she didn’t even try to claw my eyes out,” Spike joked.
“Really? You sing, Buffy?”
“No – ”
Spike cut her off.
“Yes, she does, and very well.”
“That’s interesting. Maybe we should
consider the possibility of you doing a song for the soundtrack? Maybe even a
duet with Spike, here? He’s already doing three songs with his band for the
album,” Wesley suggested, oblivious to her discomfort.
“No, I think I’ll
leave the singing to him and I’ll stick to acting,” Buffy told the men.
Great, yet another situation I get to fantasize about being with Spike
in. Buffy gritted her teeth and smiled tightly.
Spike on the other
hand, was enjoying watching her squirm. He wasn’t tired in the least but had
refrained from starting a conversation in the car and shielded his eyes to give
himself a little quiet time to think and to make her wonder. He was also able to
observe her without her knowing with the sunglasses on, and that was a plus. He
could tell in the car that she was conflicted; from the way she bit her lip and
kept looking at him nervously. She was confused about him, about them, and that
made him very happy. At least he wasn’t the only one scratching his head about
what was going on.
“Alright people, lets get this done. Get the water on
them.” Wes called out, pointing to Buffy and Spike.
“Bottoms up, eh
luv?” Spike asked with a grin. Buffy smiled back and let out a small yelp as the
water was poured over her shoulders. It was warm but getting colder fast and
seeped into her clothes as she shivered. Spike grumbled slightly as well but as
soon as they took their places they snapped out of it.
“You don’t seem
to get this, do you? There won’t be any money to give you unless we find
my partner. And we can’t do that unless you stop being a big baby and drive the
damn car,” Buffy started with the lines that they had rehearsed yesterday in the
pool.
“I can’t drive the car, and you know it. I’m a wanted car
thief, in case you’ve forgotten.” Spike threw his arms wide at her.
“And
I’m the one with the gun! Who’s got who by the balls now?”
“I don’t
care! Shoot me, it’s not like I don’t have dirt on you when the cops come to get
me!”
“Whatever.” Buffy moved to go into the motel room, but was grabbed
by the arm by Spike. He turned her around quickly, drawing a slight gasp out of
her. He pulled her to him and slammed his lips on hers, barely giving her time
to react. The kiss softened slightly, the passion obvious as she started to
respond. Buffy was just getting into the kiss when Snyder yelled ‘cut’. Spike
released her immediately, not even looking at her.
“Good. Let’s take it
again, from the top,” Wes directed. Buffy took a couple steps back to her mark
and took a deep breath. That had felt hot, but he wouldn’t even look at her. Was
this him telling her the first kiss was wrong? Buffy pondered this as the makeup
people misted her more with water bottles.
They did the scene again, and
again Buffy felt the spark between them but Spike showed no sign of recognition
or of encouragement. He released her immediately when Snyder yelled ‘cut’ and
didn’t even look at her, except in the scene. She knew of people that got into
the character and tried not to be disturbed when they were in ‘the zone’ but
this was Spike! Last night he had been hot to trot for her, and this
morning it was like she didn’t even exist. Maybe they weren’t going to act as
friendly as they said they would. Maybe he was second-guessing their friendship-
maybe he was second-guessing her!
Over and over they kissed, and
each time Buffy tried to get some kind of reaction from him – a look, a smile,
any kind of acknowledgement that she was alive in his world, but got nothing. By
the time Snyder had felt that he had enough takes of the kiss, Buffy was
confused beyond belief. She walked away from the set to give herself a little
time, biting her lip and wondering what had happened.
Spike watched her
go, pleased with himself for not giving into the kiss. He had wanted to, boy had
he wanted to. But if she wanted to keep things strictly professional, then that
is how things would be. The way she had reacted told him that it didn’t seem
like it would be that much longer before she caved and admitted to herself how
much she liked him.
“That was was rather- um… realistic, was it not?.”
Wesley came over to stand next to Spike. The blonde man just looked at his
fellow Brit and smiled slyly and walked away.
“Ready for the next one,
luv?” Spike asked Buffy as he passed her, on his way to his trailer. She just
stopped and watched his retreating form walk away, still completely confused
about those kisses.
“So what’s up between you and Buffy, man?” Xander asked Spike as they walked
towards the trailers.
“What do you mean?” Spike asked with a grin.
“Come on. You go away last week pretty much at death’s door and come
back all closer than close. Just wondering what happened in those two days to
turn a Johnny don’t into a Johnny do.”
“We’re not doing anything,
if that’s what you’re getting at Harris,” Spike told him, not wanting to start
rumors like that about Buffy.
“But you want to?” Xander asked Spike
sighed and turned to him.
“You’re not going to let up, are you?”
“I’m on a mission from Cordy, so no.”
“Cordelia? What’s that
bird got to do with this?” Spike gestured for Xander to come into his trailer
when they reached it and the two sat at the small table.
“Well, she’s
been noticing how preoccupied Buffy was this week and I just thought I would
offer my services to inquire as to the – ”
Spike cut him off. “You’re
sweet on her, aren’t you, whelp?” Spike asked, taking out a pack of cigarettes
and a lighter from his pocket. He lit one as Xander turned red and started to
stutter.
“Well, no- I mean… she’s… I ….W-well,” he sighed. “Do you think
it’s this obvious to Cordy?”
“Absolutely no doubt in my mind. That’s why
she sent you here to scope out the information. You’re her little lap dog now,”
Spike chuckled.
“Do you think she likes me?” Xander asked.
“Maybe. Women are a bit of an enigma, aren’t they?” Spike puffed hard on
his cigarette, thinking about one particular blonde he was trying to figure out
and bait at the same time, not really knowing what he was doing. He knew that
this week had been getting to her, making her doubt her decisions but he
wondered if it wasn’t going a little too far, pushing her away instead.
“Ain’t that the truth? So what is it? Got your own enigma there, Spike?”
Xander asked. Spike sighed and threw his butt to the ground, stomping it out
with his heavily booted foot.
“Something like that. What do you think of
Buffy?” Spike asked Xander.
“She’s pretty cool. I suppose you would know
more about that than I would though.”
“What do you mean?” Spike asked.
“Come on. You guys didn’t just come back in one piece from Wes’s
experiment in friendship; you guys came back practically joined at the hip. Why
haven’t you made your move yet? According to Cordy, Buffy’s just about pulling
her hair out over you – in a good way.”
“She is?” Spike had to smile at
this, ecstatic he’d gotten confirmation that his trial in giving her a dose of
her own medicine was working.
“So you are digging on her?” Xander asked,
triumphantly.
“Yeah, maybe a little. Don’t know what’s going to happen
though.”
“I’m sure you’ll think of something, Casanova,” Xander clapped
him on the shoulder as he stood up. “If Cordy has any say in it you guys will be
together by the end of next week.”
“We’ll see,” Spike murmured, as
Xander walked away to his trailer. “We’ll see.”
“So what’s the deal with you and that hottie?” Cordelia grilled Buffy as she
changed from the tiny bathroom.
“What hottie?” Buffy asked, emerging
from the tiny toilet dressed in her own clothes.
“Duh! Spike! Are you
guys progressing well?” Cordy asked, almost bouncing in her seat and the small
trailer table. Buffy sat beside her.
“Progressing toward what?” Buffy
asked, desperately hoping to avoid the whole conversation about her love life –
at least when it came to one bleached wonder and her less than clean thoughts
about him of late.
Cordy shook her head. “Buffy, I swear, sometimes I
think you just want to slay your love life and close yourself off from
everyone.”
“It’s worked in the past?” Buffy explained weakly.
“Move on from the past then, open your eyes and wake up to the snotty
British goodness you have at your feet, waiting to fetch you your slippers.”
“What?”
“He’s totally your lapdog!” Cordy screeched.
“No, we’re just friends Cordy,” Buffy said with a shake of her head, not
wanting to get her hopes up or confuse herself further over the state of
whatever relationship she had with Spike right now.
“Right. That’s why I
see him making moon eyes at you all the time, trying to get your attention,
teasing you, making you wonder about him. I’d go after him myself, but it’s not
like he’d notice me anyway, not with you around.”
“Huh?” Buffy hadn’t
succeeded in trying to remain oblivious to the other girl’s comments and was now
thinking back on the past week for any signs that Cordy seemed to think he was
giving out.
“Oh come on Buffy. Spike’s got a crush on you. He’s totally
in love with you.”
“No, he’s not. I promise you. He’s a friend now.
That’s all. Why can’t anyone understand that?” Buffy kept insisting.
Cordy sighed. “Why are you so adamant in screwing this up? There is a
guy out there, totally trying to get you to fall for him and you don’t even want
to see it. I don’t know what this is about but you need to figure it out, spank
your inner moppet and move on. I know you haven’t exactly had the best of
relationships, from seeing Angel, but if that’s what’s causing this total
daytime soap opera trauma where you deny yourself what you really want then you
have to snap out of it. Great guys like Spike only come around like once in
never. He likes you, act on it.”
“I can’t though. What is
something goes wrong and we end up hating each other worse and then we ruin the
movie?” Buffy replied, desperately trying to make Cordy understand her
reasoning, and maybe trying to re-convince herself in the process.
“You
guys are actors for Christ’s sake. You’ll get over it. Besides, weren’t
you ever a young girl and thought that when your true love came along you’d
scale the highest mountain or swim in the deepest sea to get to him? Didn’t you
ever have that fantasy?”
“Well, yeah. But I doubt Spike is my true
love,” Buffy said.
“I bet he’d be good in the sack though. That would be
good enough, wouldn’t it?” Cordy said thoughtfully.
“Cordelia!” Buffy
shrieked.
Cordy just regarded her with a raised eyebrow. “Oh yeah, like
you don’t want to jump his bones.”
Buffy blushed but didn’t deny it.
“See? Look, he likes you. I don’t know what you want to do with that
information but I hope you don’t deny yourself the great time that you could
have with him, even if it’s just for the next couple of months. At least it’s a
way for you not to get attached. Stop thinking about everyone else’s wants and
needs and think about your own. Got it?” Cordelia asked, standing up.
Buffy nodded and watched the brunette leave her trailer.
“See ya
later.”
Cordelia had made a lot of sense with her speech. It was high
time that she started living for herself and quit worrying about others
expectations and their views. But when that went for her career, it was hard for
her to think that way.
Then again, two months wouldn’t hurt, would it?
If things didn’t work out they would likely never see each other again beyond
this movie.
At least it’s a way for you not to get attached,
Cordy’s words echoed in her ears. Buffy sighed and laid her head in her hands.
Great, blow my career off, get involved with a totally inappropriate man and
then get attached. I have a flair to do the complete opposite of what I should…
damn. There is no way I can get involved with him. None.
“Buffy, you need to get laid.”
“Willow!” Buffy yelled into the
receiver at her best friend/manager. “You’re supposed to be trying to cover up
my tawdry affairs, not cause them! “
“Kind of hard to cover up
non-existence. Look, I saw the pictures of you and Spike at the club and you
looked pretty cozy.”
“No, no, no,” Buffy moaned, burying her face in her
hands yet again.
“Something wrong?” Willow asked.
“I just don’t
get why everyone is so persistent in trying to interfere in my self-imposed
chastity, especially when it comes to one Spike Giles.”
“You’ve taken a
vow of chastity?” Willow asked, confused.
“No, but I think I should when
it comes to Spike,” Buffy sighed and slumped onto her bed, pulling the covers
over her. It was just after nine and Buffy was so tired that she was ready to
turn in. She had to call her best friend before she could turn in though to try
to alleviate some of her conflicted feelings before sleeping on them.
“Has something happened? Or will happen?”
“No, I don’t think so.
I won’t let it,” Buffy explained.
“Why the hell not? I may be gay but I
know a hottie when I see one,” Willow said.
“Because he’s my co-star,
Will. And I’m trying to focus on my career right now. I can’t go off all
willy-nilly with a co-star,” Buffy told Willow, trying to reaffirm her own
convictions.
“Willy-nilly? Ok, Buffy, you really need to get
laid. I don’t care if it’s by Spike or some random guy, just get some and get
over it.”
“Willow Rosenberg!! Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Look, I appreciate that you’re so concerned with my love life but honestly;
can’t a girl just take some down time from guys? Can’t she just want to be
friends, platonic, everyday, no pressure friends?”
“Buffy, it’s me. Your
best friend. You can’t give me that bullshit and expect me to believe it. You
like him, don’t you?”
Buffy sighed and closed her eyes. “Yes.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“Us! This! The movie, my career, the
fact that in two months he’ll be gone off on another adventure.” The words
tumbled out of her mouth before she could stop them.
“Maybe this is your
adventure, Buffy,” Willow told her softly. “Who says that every relationship has
to last for a long time? I know you’re scared, Buffy, but you have to stop
living your life that way. You have to stop hiding behind your career and start
facing up to real life.”
“I know, Will. But it’s hard, you know? I just-
don’t know what to do,” Buffy slumped farther down on her bed.
“Do what
feels right. Don’t push it, but don’t pass up a perfect opportunity to be happy
just because you are worried about tomorrow or next week or something, ok?
Promise me you won’t hide anymore?”
“I promise to try,” Buffy offered.
Willow sighed but accepted. They talked for a little while longer, arranging a
time to get together for lunch and for Willow to come to the set. Just when they
were about to hang up Willow remembered something she meant to bring up.
“Oh! Buffy, I need to talk to you about something before you go.”
“Shoot.”
“I’ve been checking out your fan mail, and FYI there
has been a noticeable increase since you started this movie, and even more since
last week when people saw you with Spike, so you’re gaining a fan base,” Willow
told her.
“Well woo for me! Yay fans,” Buffy said tiredly, but
internally excited at the thought of people liking her.
“Yeah, that’s
the good news. I came across a couple letters and cards that were a little…
well… odd to say the least. I just don’t know what to do about them.”
“Odd how?” Buffy asked, sitting up.
“Just very obsessive. Could
be an over zealous fan, or it could be a precursor to something more serious. Do
you want me to notify the police?” Willow asked.
“Nah,” Buffy shook her
head to herself. “Keep them around, but if there are any more tell me and we’ll
go from there. I’m sure I have more than one odd fan out there, given my roles
of late. He’s probably just a Trekkie fan who liked my Vulcan turn.”
“If
you say so,” Willow replied. Finally they finished their conversation and hung
up, allowing Buffy to sigh contentedly and sink back into the bed, dropping the
phone on her stand. She relaxed, allowing the tension to ease out of her body.
*RING* Buffy’s eyes snapped open at the doorbell. She looked at the
clock and groaned, then grumbled to herself at being annoyed about not being
able to go to bed at nine-thirty in the evening. When had she become such an old
maid?
She stumbled out of the bed and shuffled to the front door in her
Yummy Sushi pajamas and bare feet and opened it without checking to see who it
was. It was either going to be hotel staff or the one person she was dreading
for two different reasons- because he was the bane of her existence and because
she was hot for him. It was the latter.
“’lo luv. You’ve got a TV,
right?” Spike brushed past her into the suite and directly to the bedroom. Buffy
closed the door and leaned her forehead against it for a brief moment before
following him. When she got to the bedroom he had taken possession of the remote
control and was flipping through the channels.
“Spike? What exactly are
you doing here?” Buffy sat on the bed and watched him.
“Trying to find
Passions. Bloody brilliant show. We get the 24-hour soap channel here.”
“So why aren’t you watching it in your room?” she asked.
“My
set’s screwed up. The connection got fried or some deal. Can’t use either of
them,” Spike explained.
“The hotel can’t fix them?” she asked.
“Luv, it’s almost ten o’clock at night. Everyone’s in bed.”
Buffy groaned at this and hid her head in the pillows.
Spike
looked at her curiously. “Are you okay, pet?”
“I’m fine. Just tired.”
Spike finally took notice of her attire, the pajamas and the rumpled bed
and realized that his scheme to get closer to her had gotten her out of bed.
“I’m sorry, luv. I didn’t know that you were asleep. I can go.” Spike put the
remote down and moved to the door.
Buffy remembered Willow’s words and
spoke up. “No, that’s okay. If your show means that much to you, you can watch
it. I don’t mind. I can be a rebel and stay up past ten.” Buffy joked.
Spike smiled and picked the remote back up. He walked to the other side
of the bed and stretched out.
Buffy just gawked at him, not believing
that the object of her trauma for the past month and a half was lying on her
bed.
He caught her look and smiled inwardly. “Is this okay, luv? I can
go to the living room,” he offered, kicking himself in the next moment because
she would probably tell him to go.
Buffy yawned and sunk down under the
covers, shaking her head. “It’s okay. I’ll probably fall asleep anyway. But you
don’t have to go. Watch the TV as long as you want. I can sleep through
anything.”
“I’ve no doubt,” he smiled at her. He turned the channel to
the Soap network and for the first little while Buffy watched as well, asking
questions here and there about who was who and what was going on. She had never
been into soaps and was slightly surprised that Spike was but not as much as she
would have been a week ago.
Spike cast the occasional look at Buffy as
they watched the show. He answered her questions happily, not caring what they
were talking about as long as they were talking about something other than movie
stuff. This seemed to be a big accomplishment, her allowing him into her room,
her bed. He wasn’t sure if this scheme of his would work or if it was foolhardy
but he was getting to know her and she was getting to know him- with any luck
soon she would feel she knew him enough to fall into his arms. Or like him
enough. According to Xander’s accounts from Cordelia that might not be that
long.
Buffy’s talking had slowed as he thought, her questions becoming
infrequent. She was in the middle of asking one question when she dragged off,
causing Spike to look over at her. She was fast asleep, her face turned towards
him so she could see how peaceful she looked. He glanced at the clock and was
surprised to see it was almost eleven. She had stayed up for almost the whole
show, which may not have seemed like much of an accomplishment to other people
but she had been active in his interest. Or maybe she was confused by the
storylines and needed clarification- either way she had stayed attentive and
then felt comfortable enough to fall asleep with him in bed with her.
He
turned off the TV and straightened her blankets as he left the room. Unable to
resist he leaned down and kissed her lightly on the top of the head, smiling. He
turned off her light and let himself out of her suite, not sure of he would
sleep that night.
Part 14: In the Name of Progress
“What’s this?” Buffy asked, looking at the CD she held in her hand.
“It’s the autographed album that I said I would get for you last month
before we ventured into the Bermuda Triangle of hatred and back out.” Spike told
her. They were in a car headed towards the set, still at the motel but this
weekend was to be their last there if they wanted to keep on schedule.
“Really? Everyone signed?” Buffy asked, excited as she opened the case.
Indeed, all of the guys in the band had signed. “Thanks. I had forgotten all
about this. This is great.”
“Glad you enjoy it. Now you can learn the
songs and hum along with us when we perform, maybe come up and sing with us.”
Spike nudged her and grinned.
Buffy swallowed and willed her heart to
calm down from it’s racing pace. “Are you asking me to come see you sing again?”
“Course.” He smiled at her, genuinely. “Always enjoy having a pretty
girl in the audience. Besides, if we start tanking we can pull you up to calm
the masses.”
“Oh no. I am leaving the singing and dancing to you and
your boys. That was my one and only brush with music.” Buffy shook her head.
“You should think about it, you know. You could be the next J. Lo.”
Buffy snorted at this. Spike appraised her and added, “Course, you’d have to get
a bigger ‘booty’, or so they say.”
Buffy stared at him, open-mouthed for
a moment before she burst out laughing. “I can’t believe you just said that!”
Spike reddened slightly and stuttered as he tried to say something
before Buffy shoved his arm lightly. “Big Bad’s embarrassed, that’s priceless!”
Spike chuckled along with her.
Thus began one of the easiest weekends of
filming they had had so far. Saturday flew by quickly, each of the scenes being
filmed with little interruption. Buffy and Spike were true professionals in
front of the camera and inseparable when they weren’t shooting. Wesley watched
them all day, elated at how well they were getting along and noticed little
hints that they were slowly circling each other for a bigger step, something to
progress them past friendship. He knew that they were both nervous, Buffy more
so than Spike, even though he was very cautious about approaching her for fear
that he would alienate her. But from what he saw she would be very receptive
towards his advances. Passion seemed to be in the air all over the set as he had
also seen Cordelia and Xander checking each other out. She had finally lost
interest in him but he couldn’t say that he was disappointed. She was nice to
look at, and somewhat of forbidden fruit but they had quickly found out there
was no chemistry there. Better luck next time, mate, he thought to
himself and turned his attention to viewing some of the dailies.
“You missed a great cliffhanger last night, luv,” Spike told Buffy as they sat
down at a table near craft services for lunch. “Luis was just about to choose
between Beth and Sheridan.”
“Oh, god. I’m sorry. I thought I’d fallen
asleep. Why didn’t you wake me?” Buffy asked, arranging her food.
“Why
would I? You were tired, I was the one that barged in to monopolize your TV.”
Spike explained.
“At least someone’s getting some use out of it. I don’t
think I’ve had it on once since I’ve been here. It just pains me to think that
you saw me when I was asleep. Which Buffy did you meet last night? Drooling
Buffy, snoring Buffy or mumbling, grumbling Buffy? Was there mumbling? Oh god,
did I talk? What did I say?” Buffy asked, nervous that she may have said
something about him in her sleep.
“Ah, so you’re telling me I can know
all your devious secrets through your REM cycle? I’ll have to remember that. And
no, there was no talking. If you had divulged anything I would just keep it all
up here,” he said, pointing to his head. “You know, for future blackmail
purposes or something of the sort.” Buffy just rolled her eyes at him, picking
at her salad.
“No,” he continued thoughtfully. “You looked so peaceful,
hair all fanned out, barely breathing, not a flaw to be found. You looked like
an angel, with wings you can’t feel and a halo you can’t see, flying above us
all.”
Buffy just stared at him, motionless. Spike stopped talking
abruptly, “Wha’?”
“I swear, if you could bottle that talent of yours and
sell it you’d be the richest guy in the world.”
“What talent?” Spike
asked, confused.
“Your words. You just have this knack of how to say
what things and when. You must be the writer in the band.”
Spike let out
a short laugh. “Not bloody likely, luv. Charlie’s more the man for that. I tend
to use big three dollar words like ‘effulgent’, not what hit singles are made
of.”
“Maybe you should give it another try. Because to me it seems like
every other sentence out of your mouth is poetry.” Buffy ducked her head to her
salad to avoid his gaze, which was astonished, then lit up from her praise.
“Maybe it’s not me, but the inspiration I have.” Spike replied lightly.
Buffy didn’t respond, still enthralled by her salad but inside she shivered.
“You need to get laid.” Charlie told him, point blank over a beer and a plate of
nachos an hour later.
“’Scuse me?” Spike asked, almost choking on a
chip.
“You’ve got yourself all worked up over this girl. She’s got you
running hot, then cold and now you’re all… tepid. She’s all temperature Buffy.
You need to knock your expectations down a little. Go out and get laid.” Charlie
explained.
Spike just looked at him with a disbelieving look on his
face. “Who are you and where did my best friend go? Why are you sayin’ this?”
“Look, I’m sorry. It’s just- this girl has you all tied up in knots and
for what?” Charlie explained.
“For her,” Spike said simply.
“I
just don’t want to see you get hurt again, man. After Dru you were… it wasn’t
pretty, ok? I just don’t want her to lead you to the lions den to be gobbled up
again.”
“I ‘ppreciate your concern, really do Charlie. But Buffy isn’t
like that. She’s… so much more.”
“She seemed nice when I met her, I
guess.”
“She is. She’s better than nice. Bloody fucking amazin’. She
brings out this… need in me. I feel alive when I’m around her, like I could go
ten rounds and run a marathon. She makes me a man, Charlie. She’s awoken the man
in the beast. I don’t think I’ve felt this way since Dru. Maybe even before
that. Maybe ever. She’s that special.” Spike waved his hands around, trying to
prove his point. “I don’t even know if I stand a chance with her. I don’t know
if she’ll ever let me into her life, let alone her heart. But I’m going to try
my damnest to try. She makes me feel like a better man.”
“Could she be
The One?” Charlie asked, trying to flesh out exactly what his friend’s feelings
were.
“Not sure. I’m just excited by being her friend. By knowing her.
Even if nothing ever happens between us, I’m glad to have met her.” Spike took a
drink of his beer. “She makes me think, challenges me. She makes me want more.”
“So how are things going with her then?”
“Better. We’re watching
TV together tonight. And you know what? That’s the most perfect thing I could do
with her.” Spike explained. “I can be near her, almost touch her, just look at
her. It’s nice. I like taking things this slow for once.”
Charlie was
silent for a few moments before leaning forward to speak. “Like I said, that
thing with Dru, that was harsh. I was really worried about you. And you did the
groupie thing which was normal but that didn’t seem to make you happy at all,
not even for a little while. And now this. This….” Charlie trailed off, trying
to find the right words. Spike picked at his nails nervously, no black nail
polish to peel off by decree of the movie heads. He realized he really was
concerned by what Charlie thought about Buffy. He and Charlie had been friends
for a long time and respected one another but had never consulted the other
about women. This time his opinion meant something to Spike.
“Charlie?”
Spike asked. “I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you so worked up over something. So
passionate and alive. It worried me because after Dru I wasn’t sure you’d ever
be the same. And then this girl comes along and you’re head over heels for her.”
Charlie paused. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you happier and to tell you the
truth I don’t know if anything else could make you this happy. What is it about
her that’s brought this on?”
Spike smiled and without thinking replied,
“She’s my equal in every way. She not only makes me feel like a better man, to
try to BE a better man.”
“Don’t let her get away then.”
“I’m
gonna do my best.”
“It hasn’t started yet, has it?” Spike asked as he stepped in the door to
Buffy’s suite. She was in her room, on the bed and had just called for him to
come in. She had already changed into her pajamas, a slinky camisole and pj
pants, having taken a bath in jasmine scented oils. She also dried and fluffed
her hair a little and put on a little mascara and lip gloss. On the prowl? Her?
Nah
“I don’t know what channel it’s on. I don’t think I even know how to
work this damn thing.” Buffy replied, picking up the remote and studying it.
Spike grinned and took it from her, turning the TV on and to the right station.
Without asking he sat on the other side of the bed, unlaced and toed off his
boots and stretched out on his back. He was wearing his trademark tight black
jeans and a gray button-up shirt that hid his muscles to the unsuspecting eye.
Buffy was positioned more towards the middle, with a small throw on her lap. She
didn’t want to get under the blankets right away, instead choosing to be mobile
for whatever might… occur.
“Do you ever watch this, luv?” Spike asked.
“I think I might have seen it once or twice. I’m kind of out of the
pop-culture loop. Why do you watch it?” Buffy asked.
“Just like the
show, getting ideas for things that I could do if I ever get a place.”
“You don’t have a home?” Buffy asked.
“I was going to rent a
place in New York, but then I got this movie and there was no need. I imagine
I’ll try to pin down a permanent address when the movie is over, depending on
what happens. But who knows?”
“Are your parents still back in England?”
Buffy asked, wanting to talk to him and learn more than watch the show. Spike
noticed this and sat up, propping himself against the headboard to he could look
at her.
“Yeah, Da and Jenny. Da is a librarian and Jenny is a teacher.”
Spike told her.
“Jenny?” She asked.
“My mum died when I was
three. Da remarried when I was seven.”
“Oh. I’m so sorry.” Buffy told
him.
“It’s ok. She had cancer quite bad so it was a blessing for her.
Jenny’s been my real mom all my life, even though not in name.”
“That’s
good then. What’s your dad like? Is he quite liberal?”
Spike snorted
slightly at this. “Not quite. Da’s very straightlaced. Don’t get me wrong, love
him to death but I swear I must have been adopted. What can you expect from a
name like Rupert, though, right?”
“Rupert. That’s a nice name. “ Buffy
smiled.
“Glad you like it. I almost became Rupert Randy Giles the
second. Luckily mom talked him out of it. I would have been screwed either way,
with a name like Rupert and a middle name like Randy. I would have been Rupes or
Horny Giles.” Buffy burst out laughing.
“That’s horrible! I don’t know
what a fate worse than that would be. Oh wait- being named Buffy.” She rolled
her eyes and laughed again.
“How did you get named Buffy?” Spike asked.
“You know what? Mom never really told me. I asked her a couple times but
she just kind of avoided me. She probably had a rabid childhood cat named that
or something and that’s what she told them to name me while she was under the
influence of the epidural.” Spike chuckled at this and they sat in a comfortable
silence, half watching the TV, half watching each other.
“You know what,
Summers?” Spike asked a couple hours later as the second episode ended.
“What’s that?” Buffy asked him, struggling to keep from yawning. She
didn’t want to fall asleep tonight and start drooling as she likely did last
night.
“It’s to bad we couldn’t have worked past ourselves last month.
We would have had more time for this.”
“More time for TV?” She asked
teasingly.
“No,” he said, swatting her playfully on the arm. “More time
with each other, to get to know one another, to just be together.”
“That
would have been nice.” Buffy replied softly.
“Yeah, it would have.”
Spike said just as softly. He reached out to tug on a lock of her hair. Instead
he twined it around his fingers and played with it.
Like spun gold,
flax in the morning sun but burning as brightly as fire in the night
illumination. Spike thought absentmindly as he watched the hair run through
his fingers.
Buffy sat still, letting him touch her hair, stroke it. She
didn’t realize she was holding her breath until he looked up at her and let her
hair go.
“Well. The show is over, and you need to get off to bed, eh?”
He told her quickly. Buffy exhaled as he sat up on the bed and started to put
him boots on. He didn’t bother to tie them, just shoved his feet in them and
stood.
“This was fun. We should do it again.” He told her, making his
way to the door in a hurry.
“OK.” Was all Buffy could say as he left.
She slumped back on the pillows and stared at the still on TV. She turned it off
and pulled back the covers to get in bed. A scent hit her and she leaned over to
where he had been laying. Burying her face in the pillow he had been using she
inhaled deeply, enveloping herself in a scent that was his aftershave, shampoo,
gel and just him.
Meanwhile in Spike’s room he laid his head against the
closed front door and cursed softly.
“Yeah, I like taking it slow. When
she isn’t so goddamn tempting!” With that he stripped off his clothes and got
into bed, thinking only of her in her pajamas and golden hair.
“Are you two going to be ok Tuesday for the love scene?” Wesley addressed both
Buffy and Spike in the morning. Buffy was again holding a cup of coffee and
Spike was stifling a yawn, the aftereffects of a night of dreaming about Buffy
walking in the sunlight. Then Charlie would pop in every now and then and push
him towards her with a handful of condoms. Spike wasn’t sure if that was because
Charlie told him to get laid or because he wanted to haul Buffy into a dark
corner every time she smiled at him. Which was a lot of late.
“We’ll be
fine, mate. The day off will do us more good than you know. Give us some time to
rest and psyched up.” Spike told him.
“You have to get psyched up to get
into bed with me?” Buffy teased, slapping his arm lightly. She blushed when she
realized what she said. “Well, I mean- I- it’s not-“
“I get it, luv.” He
left it at that, walking away quickly to cool down. This was getting to be too
much. Maybe Charlie was right. Maybe he was building her up in his mind and it
was causing him more harm than good. But he couldn’t just pick up some random
girl to go have sex with, he was beyond that. SHE was beyond that, which brought
him back to why he was doing this to begin with. For her; to try to be a better
person for her. HE wanted to prove to her that he was above simple sex and
groupies and the rock and roll lifestyle. He could respect her wishes. He just
didn’t know for how long.
Buffy stood, wondering if she should go after
him. He looked almost pained when he walked away. They were friends now. Which
is what she wanted. Or so she thought. Now that they were getting along great
she was very happy but the more she got to know him the more she liked him. And
the more she liked him the more she wanted to jump his sexy bones. Why couldn’t
he be gay? Or have ingrown toenails or halitosis? Maybe he’s got backne? That
would be a turn off, right? Ooh! And webbed feet- that would be weird! Maybe his
eyes are contacts and that’s why they’re so blue and he got cheekbone implants
to look so gaddamn sexy. FUCK! Why do I have to be so goddamn prissy and be
‘friends’ with him? Why couldn’t I just have said- sure, I’ll ride you like a
stallion, you big hunk of glistening man-meat. Buffy wracked her brains
trying to think up one logical excuse for why she got him to back off.
Because it’s not right to treat someone like a vending machine. You can’t
expect to push a button and get what you want all the time. These things take
patience. And if that had happened you wouldn’t have known what a great guy he
is. He deserves that. He deserves to have someone know how special he is, what a
good man he is and keeps striving to be.
Buffy sighed to herself and
straightened her shoulders, walking over to where Spike seemed lost in thought.
She tapped him on the shoulder to snap him out of his daze. “Ready to go to
work?” She flashed him a big smile and walked off to the set, leaving him
staring at her.
It’s going to be a LONG day, Spike groaned to
himself and followed her, thinking about trees, stinky cheese and fluffy kittens
to keep his body from reacting to her.
It didn’t work.
“Kill me now.” Buffy groaned as they drove back to the hotel in a car. Spike
patted her hand. It was almost eight o’clock and they had been filming almost
non-stop all day.
“Tomorrow’s a day to rest, luv. And I can’t imagine
Tuesday will be that much work.” He laughed. Buffy blushed for the
trillionth time that day, wishing she could stop.
“No, I don’t think it
will be.” She replied, not meeting his eyes. An uncomfortable silence filled the
car then, both wondering what the other was thinking about Tuesday and their
love scenes.
“Want to have dinner? In the hotel restaurant?” Spike
asked.
“I was actually planning on just ordering some room service after
a long bath. I hurt from all that sprinting.” Buffy replied, referring to the
scenes they shot that day.
“I can imagine. I suppose I’ll do that too.
Just lounge. What are you planning on doing tomorrow?” He asked.
“Sleep.
Much sleep. You?”
“’Bout the same. Maybe we could get a late brunch?” He
asked.
“Sure. That sounds good. French toast with strawberries and a
tall glass of orange juice.” Buffy told him. “Mom used to make that for me and
Dawn all the time when we were younger.”
“Sounds nice. We’ll have to get
that for you tomorrow then.”
“Yeah.” Buffy and Spike stared out their
windows until they got back to the hotel. They rode the elevator in silence, the
tension between then thick enough to be cut with a knife.
“So um… guess
I’ll see you in the morning then?” Spike asked when they reached her door.
“Guess so. You know- um, if you wanted, I mean… if you need anything
this evening you can call, or pop over or whatever. You now, if you want.” Buffy
told Spike hesitantly.
Spike broke out in a huge smile. “Will do luv.
Will do. You have yourself a good night, you hear?”
Buffy nodded and
watched him walk to his suite as she opened her door. She ducked inside and gave
a huge sigh of relief. “I’m such a dork,” she muttered.
She didn’t really expect him to show up. She honestly didn’t. If she had she
wouldn’t have worn such a short nightie to bed. She would have put on pants or
something of the like, so as not to embarrass herself. She also would have done
something with her hair rather than just pile it on top of her head in a messy
bun. So when she opened the door at almost ten o’clock she was turning red again
to see Spike standing at her door with a bowl of popcorn in his hand, a bottle
of champagne and two glasses. His hair was a little mussed up from not doing
much with it when he got out of the shower. He was also in track pants and a
t-shirt, which was a pleasant surprise for her.
Spike almost dropped his
champagne glasses when he saw Buffy standing on the other side of the door. She
was wearing a skimpy little nightie that looked like it would be from Victoria’s
Secret and didn’t even fall to her knees. Her hair was pulled up but bits and
pieces fell out of her holder to float around her face, elongating her neck and
calling him to kiss it.
“Are you busy?” he asked stupidly.
“What? N-no. I was just sitting around. Please, c-come in.” Buffy
stuttered.
“I called the front desk and asked about the pay-per-view
movies they had so maybe we could rent a couple and have an easy night in. I
even brought popcorn, as you can see.” Spike said, waving the bowl awkwardly as
he stepped over the threshold.
“Oh, let me get that.” Buffy took the
bowl from him so he could carry the champagne and glasses easier.
“Thanks, luv. I also had room service bring up some bubbly. Thought that
it might be nice, kind of our own little gourmet picnic. That’s if you don’t
mind. I just barged in again, didn’t I? It’s late and it looks like you were-“
“No, no.” Buffy said quickly. “It’s fine. This is nice. Really.” She
smiled softly. “I can’t think of a better way to spend my night.”
“Alright then.” Spike smiled shyly at her and looked down nervously.
“So what is there to watch for movies?” Buffy asked moving to the
bedroom. She picked up the remote and looked at it with the same confused look
she had the night before and then handed it to Spike who laughed at her.
“We just have to pick from this list,” he said turning the TV to the
pay-per-view station. “And then we call the front desk to order them. So what
are we up for? Drama, romance, horror, comedy?”
“Horror. At least then
I’ll stand a chance of staying awake through it. Won’t be able to sleep.” Buffy
laughed.
“Well, ‘The Ring’ is playing. I hear that’s pretty creepy.”
“Guess we’ll find out.” Buffy said as Spike used her phone to call the
desk. In a couple minutes they were curled up on the bed, Buffy with the throw
wrapped tightly around her so her nightie wouldn’t ride up, close enough that
their shoulders touched. They had the bowl of popcorn between them and their
hands would touch every few minutes, sending shivers through each of them. Spike
had poured them both a glass of champagne when the movie started, which Buffy
gulped down quickly to soothe her nerves from being around him but the second
one remained almost untouched as she got more engrossed by the film.
Spike had a hard time concentrating on the movie with Buffy being so
close. He could hear her breathe, smell her shampoo, feel her soft skin when
their hands touched. It was driving him mad. Luckily the lights were off and she
couldn’t make out the bulge he had in his pants. This went on till later in the
film when the female character was in a house trying to talk with a man about
the origins of the tape that killed people after they watched it. Buffy had been
edging closer to him inch by inch throughout the movie when scary things
happened but when he electrocuted himself Buffy shrieked and buried her face in
Spike’s shoulder.
“That scary, huh, luv?” Spike whispered to her.
“Oh my god. That was horrible.” She replied, her voice muffled. She
turned her head carefully back to the screen but didn’t move, instead adjusting
herself so she was leaned more comfortably against him, her throw covering them
both now. Spike didn’t complain, instead wrapped his arm around her and held her
close for more of the scary scenes.
Finally when the movie was almost
over Spike could tell something was going to happen. “I don’t think you should
watch this part luv, if you want to sleep tonight. I think it’s going to be
pretty scary.” He whispered to her. She didn’t respond. He pulled back to look
at her and saw that she was fast asleep, curled into his side, one arm around
his waist.
“Oh, Buffy. What you do to me.” He whispered to her, kissing
the top of her head. She didn’t stir. He sat and watched the rest of the movie,
rolling his eyes at the ending. When it was over he looked down at her,
wondering how he could disentangle himself without waking her. He tried to move
her arm but she tightened it around his waist and snuggled in closer. He sighed
and sunk down into the bed a little more, content with where he was but a little
worried about her reaction in the morning.
At least I’ll get a little
piece of heaven for right now, he thought as he drifted off to sleep.
Just a little.
Buffy awoke the next morning feeling warm and a little bit dozy. She stretched
slightly and wiggled her feet. When she did they hit something. Another person
something. She tensed, feeling the arm around her waist and the hard chest
pressed up against her back. Someone was spooning her! She turned her head
slightly and caught a glimpse of shock white hair. She breathed a sigh of relief
that it was just Spike but then tensed again. Spike? What the hell is Spike
doing in my bed? She thought frantically. Who cares? He’s here, he’s hot
and he’s holding you, the other part of her mind told her.
Spike
mumbled slightly in his sleep and pulled her with him as he rolled over. She
curled into him, wanting to enjoy this a little longer. If this was all she got
from him then that would have to be enough. She wanted him though. She wanted
him bad. No matter what. But what could she do?
Spike mumbled a little
more in his sleep, and then opened his eyes, staring straight into hers. He
blinked a couple times, trying to remember where he was and how he got there.
Trying to imprint the feel of her body on his, her legs next to his, her hands
on his t-shirted chest.
“Hi.” Buffy whispered, lids heavy from sleep,
her hair tousled in a sexy way. Spike raised a hand to her cheek, which she
leaned into.
“Hi.” He whispered back. They stared at each other, not
wanting to speak and break the mood. Buffy fought with herself back and fourth,
trying to decide whether to get out of bed and get her day started or to stay
here and look at him all day. To hell with it, she thought and leaned
down.
Spike’s eyes widened as he watched her lean down to him. He had
been worried when he woke up that she was going to get angry at him for being in
bed with her but when she didn’t say anything all he wanted to do was hold her
and look at her, content with doing that all day. But now- now he wanted more.
“Spike….” Buffy breathed.
Part 15: Morning Glory
“Buffy…” Spike whispered as her mouth came down to lightly caress his. So
light that he couldn’t even feel her mouth and wondered if she was even kissing
him. To prove that she was, she let her tongue drift out of her mouth and skim
his lips gently, wetting them.
Spike kissed back tentatively, not
knowing what was going through her head. He didn’t want this to turn out to be a
momentary lapse of sanity on her part because it certainly wasn’t for him. This
is what he had wanted since the very moment he had met her. When she rested her
body on her elbows and threaded her fingers through his hair to pull his head
closer he threw away any worries he had and kissed her back wholeheartedly.
Buffy gave herself up to him and pushed away any outside thoughts, ideas
or sounds just so she could enjoy herself, for however long this would last. A
nagging doubt in the back of her mind remained. What would he say to her when he
decided he liked her better as a close friend, as they’d been for the past week?
She closed her mind off to the doubt. Spike was kissing her, and she didn’t care
about anything else.
Spike groaned into the kiss and rolled them over so
he was lying over her and able to look down at her. They broke away from each
other and just looked into each other’s eyes, before he touched his forehead to
hers. Buffy slowly ran her hands up and down his back, loving the feel of him
over her, his muscled back flexing softly. She found the edge of his t-shirt and
slipped her hands underneath when he didn’t pull away. He kept his forehead
against hers, staring into her eyes until her nails lightly scraped up each of
his sides, drawing a shudder from him as he jumped slightly.
“Hey now,”
he rasped. “Don’t get any ideas.”
Buffy’s eyes twinkled back at him.
“Me?” she asked, smiling innocently. “Get ideas?”
“Right. I’m sure you
don’t have some evil plan cooked up in there.” Spike smiled down at her and
tapped her forehead gently. He dragged his fingertip down over her nose to her
lips, which he traced absently, before kissing individually – the top first,
then the bottom. Buffy was rendered breathless from his touch, as soft and
delicate as it was.
“I’m always innocent.” She whispered, drawing his
face back to hers.
Spike smiled against her mouth, amazed by this
creature in bed with him. She was sexy, forward and had thrown her inhibitions
to the wind, at least for now, but he could worry about that later. After the
kissing.
Buffy let her hands slip out from under his shirt and grip the
edge. Before he knew what was happening she had pulled away from him and
stripped the t-shirt off him allowing her unrestricted access to his muscular
upper body. She rolled them so she could lay over him, and caught Spike off
guard again. He didn’t protest though, instead he enjoyed her taking the lead.
She smiled to herself as she splayed her hands over his chest, feeling
his heart pounding under one and raw heat underneath both. Spike made no move to
hide his skin from her, or to disguise his hard breathing and pounding heart.
Soon she would feel the biggest evidence of his desire, and he wasn’t one to
deny the obvious.
Buffy began to kiss her way down his smooth chest. She
began at his neck, across his collarbones, down his pecs to one nipple that she
caught between her teeth. His breath quickened and he moaned a little as her
tongue moved over the rapidly hardening nub. She let it go and grinned at him,
before returning her attention to the nipple. She blew on it to cool it where
she had licked it before biting it again, drawing another moan from him. Spike’s
arms wrapped around her and dragged her up his body once more, intent on ending
her torture of him.
“Someone’s got a weak spot,” she murmured against
his lips, still grinning.
“And someone’s got an amazing mouth,” Spike
replied before engaging her lips in another kiss, this one soft and drawn out.
When they pulled away from each other Buffy rested her forehead against his
again and closed her eyes, wondering how this could feel so right after all of
her hesitations and denials and talks with him about professionalism and
friendship.
“Buffy?” Spike asked, wrapping his arms around her slim
waist. Their legs tangled beneath the throw, which had wound its way around both
of them.
“What are we doing Spike?” she asked, lifting her head to look
him in the eye.
“We’re sayin’ good morning,” he replied.
Buffy
laughed. “Okay, just how many people do you say good morning to this way? And
why aren’t you this…” Buffy searched for a word to explain his amorous
early-in-the-morning actions when she felt how active he was as she shifted on
him. “…awake, shall we say, everyday?”
“First of all, I say good morning
to everyone. It’s just that they get the lip service whereas you get the lip,”
he kissed his way down her neck lightly, drawing giggles from her. “The tongue,”
he licked his way back up her neck to her earlobe. “And the teeth service,” he
finished, nipping gently back down her neck to her collarbone, which left her
shivering. “And secondly, I’m ‘awake’ as you put it now and not most normal
mornings because on those mornings I don’t wake up next to and get attacked by a
beautiful, sexy nymph who wants to tear my clothes off.”
“I didn’t
attack you! I didn’t rip any clothes off you either!” Buffy exclaimed. Spike
looked down at his naked chest pointedly, causing Buffy to blush. “Okay… maybe a
little with the ripping. But I didn’t attack you! If anything the attacking was
mutual!” She giggled, tickling him in the side. He grabbed her hands and pulled
them away from their bodies so she was sprawled on his chest. He leaned up to
kiss her when she pulled away again and looked at him.
“Wha’?” he asked,
his lips pursed and ready to kiss.
“You think I’m beautiful?” she asked,
his comment replaying in her mind.
He shrugged as if it were obvious.
“And sexy to boot, don’t forget. Don’t you look yourself in the mirror every
morning and say ‘I’m beautiful and a sexy bitch’?”
“Um, not usually. Do
you?” she asked.
“Course. Got to keep the self esteem up,” he replied.
She laughed. “You’re such a dork.” She pulled her hands from his, then
framed his face with them, her thumbs stroking his cheekbones. “This is nice.”
“So, you were here with me?”
“I was,” Buffy replied.
“So,” he started again, covering her hands with his. “What does this
mean?”
“I don’t know. Does it have to mean something?” She asked.
“No, not right now. You’re right. This is nice. Have to admit, been
wondering how I could give it another go with you. After the whole being
friend’s thing you talked to me about and such. Which is fine! I really like
being your friend, cause once I got to know you – ”
“Spike,” Buffy
interjected. “Shut up.” With that said, she covered his mouth with hers again.
He groaned as her tongue slipped into his mouth again and he rolled them so he
was lying over her once more. Buffy snaked an arm around his back to hold him
close, as close as she had been wanting to for a while. Spike’s mind soared with
the realization that she was holding him tightly against her, initiating the
kisses, making the moves. Sure, things could change later, but for now, he was
helpless to her wiles.
Buffy’s stomach let out a mighty gurgle then,
jarring them both. Or maybe to her appetite, Spike thought with a smile.
“Sorry,” she offered, looking genuinely contrite. “Guess it couldn’t
wait.”
“That’s right. We have a date for brunch.” He was actually
excited to say it even though there was nothing more he would’ve liked to do
today than stay in bed with her. But, to be able to say the word ‘date’ without
her rolling her eyes was worth it too.
“Come on.” Buffy crawled out from
underneath him and out of bed, tugging her nightie down to preserve some
modesty. Spike took a couple deep breaths to will himself to relax, especially
the more ‘awake’ part of him before rolling out after him. Buffy ran into the
bathroom as Spike stretched, wondering how long it would take her to get
prepared.
“Ready,” Buffy chirped a minute later when she emerged, in pj
bottoms and a t-shirt, blue hooded sweatshirt and her hair back in a baseball
cap. Spike just gaped at her. Buffy shoved her cell phone in the pocket of her
hoodie, then grabbed his hand and tugged him to the door. “Come on. Food is
a’waiting!”
“We can’t go yet!” Spike exclaimed, pulling her back. Buffy
stared at him with her hands on her hips.
“And why not?”
Spike
gestured to himself as if the answer were obvious. When Buffy shook her head at
him, not understanding, he sighed. “I look like I just got out of bed, luv. My
hair,” he said dramatically, pointing at his head, “is awful.”
Buffy
rolled her eyes at him. “You’re going to tell me that the Big Bad, the macho,
beefy, strong manly man can’t go to breakfast without having his hair done?”
“Well there might be people there. Can’t have them seeing a music
superstar all disheveled,” Spike defended.
Buffy rolled her eyes at him.
“Spike, wanna know something?”
“What?”
“It’s very sexy. All
messy like that. Which does remind you of getting out of bed, which reminds
people of what one does in bed… could be a new look for you,” Buffy told him.
“Don’t think so luv. The only reason I’m doing this is because you might
go all Xena on me if you don’t get fed and watered,” Spike teased, tugging on
his t-shirt that he found in the bed.
“You make me sound like
livestock!” Buffy grumbled.
Spike laughed and caught her by the waist as
they walked out of the room. She tensed slightly and then relaxed into his arm,
not knowing what to do now that they were out of bed, as if it had been a safe
zone for them to do what they wanted.
Spike noticed her hesitation as he
led her from the suite and wondered if she was regretting things. He understood
why she had tensed though, he was as confused as she was. They’d hated each
other at first sight, then fallen in like, and now… It was a lot to try to work
through. He’d be damned if he would screw it up now, though. He didn’t want to
push her and end up ruining things, so she could make the calls. And he could
only hope she made the right ones.
“You know,” he said as they got on
the elevator, “we could have ordered room service and had breakfast in bed to
sate your hunger.”
“Yeah, but what hunger would you be hoping to sate
while in that bed, Mr. Giles?” Buffy teased.
“Dirty mind you have there,
Summers!” he exclaimed.
“No worse than you, Mr. Innuendo.” She poked him
in the side lightly.
He laughed and then grew silent. “I want to kiss
you,” He whispered, scared she would say no.
She smiled shyly and
wrapped her arms around his waist, offering her lips to him. He leaned down and
kissed her gently, sweetly. When they broke apart, a tiny sigh of relief escaped
him. He was happy that the spell that had fallen over them in her bed had not
worn off.
“So,” he began as they separated. “What is… this?” He gestured
between the two of them.
Buffy thought for a second. “I’m not sure. I’m
still – I have reservations, I guess. Not about you,” she added quickly, seeing
his gaze shift downward. “Just that I’ve been fighting this for so long, and
now… here we are, doing what I have been telling myself is beyond wrong.”
“So?” Spike wasn’t sure what that last statement meant. Was what they
now had, wrong in her eyes? Did it make her feel guilty?
“So, I don’t
think we can properly define this or say one way or another, what we expect. We
haven’t really had the most conventional relationship anyway, what with the high
profile circumstances, and then the hating and the fighting and hitting and all
that. All that I know is that when I woke up this morning I had the choice
between getting out of there and stopping everything or staying and seeing what
would happen. But I can’t say that I’m sorry about that.”
Spike nearly
sagged against her with relief. “So we’re… really good friends?” He smiled at
her as Buffy laughed lightly and nodded.
“I think that’s a safe estimate
for right now. I don’t think it’s fair for either of us to put a label on this,
one way or the other, and have expectations for things that may never happen…
you know?”
“I think so. We just let this progress as it does and not
worry about making grand gestures?” Spike asked. He understood her hesitation,
even though it bothered him a little. He knew she was scared, he was too, but he
couldn’t help but wish for a more concrete promise. Hell, he’d even take a
‘maybe someday’ right now and be satisfied. But if this was what he got, he
would take it willingly and gratefully.
“Yeah. That sounds good. And in
the meantime, we’re good friends.” Buffy smiled up at him. He smiled back and
reached for her hand, which he squeezed as the doors opened.
They walked
to the dining room together, holding hands in silence, instead enjoying the
unexpected turn of events and the lazy morning. They went through the buffet
line together, giggling over the French toast for no reason at all before Spike
led her to a table secluded by a couple potted trees so he could keep her all to
himself.
“So, are you nervous about tomorrow?” Buffy asked after a few
minutes of quiet while they ate. Spike looked thoughtful as he chewed and
swallowed.
“Not nervous so much as unsure of what to do, or how to do
it, or how to approach it. Filming love and actually making love are two
very different things. I’m not so worried now about getting into bed with you,
seeing as how I’ve already been there,” he said, smirking at her. She rolled her
eyes at him with a smile. “But it’ll be harder with people watching. I’m a
little scared that I won’t be able to pull it off… that I’ll freeze up.”
“You’re telling me that the great Romeo, Spike Giles, could freeze up in
bed?” Buffy asked in mock disbelief. “Trust me, you will do great. You have
this way about you. As if the very moment the cameras turn on you melt
away and you’re replaced by your character. It’s remarkable, really. And you’re
right, it is different filming a love scene. It can be off-putting to fake
passion, especially when you have to do it over and over, with people watching
and interrupting all the time, but in another way it’s easier because you can
detach yourself from the situation and not worry about getting caught up in the
moment.”
“I don’t know about that, luv. It doesn’t matter if I’m in bed
or not, I seem to get caught up in the moment a lot when I’m around you.” Buffy
blushed as he went on. “So you’ve done this before?”
“A couple times. I
had a bit part in a movie and for Demon Hunter I had to do one or two.”
Buffy laughed at the scowl Spike got on his face at her response. “Let me assure
you though, I don’t just jump into bed with every co-star I have. Just one or
two… or three.”
“Yuk it up, luv.” Spike frowned until Buffy reached over
the table and squeezed his hand.
“I’m a little nervous about tomorrow,
just so you know. Cause I’ve never done this with someone that I liked before.
To tell you the truth, I don’t think it will be hard for me to fake the passion
with you. That’s never been a problem,” she confessed.
Spike felt his
breath hitch in this throat as he looked at her. “That’s one of the very best
things you ever could have told me, Buffy. I feel the same way about you,” he
said softly, squeezing her hand back. They smiled at each other over their
French toast breakfast, the air crackling between them. Just as Spike was
prepared to stand up and sweep her off her feet with a mind-blowing kiss, fellow
restaurant patrons be damned, Buffy’s cell phone rang.
She shot him an
apologetic look and grabbed her phone to answer it. “Hello? Willow! Long time no
chat! Where have you been? … Sure, sure. Excuses, excuses. … I know. Yeah, I’ve
kept busy.” Buffy smiled at Spike at that statement. “Oh? That’s odd. No, I’m
not scared by it. It’s just some weirdo with a strong interest in my movies and
me. … Fine, bring them and let’s take a look at them. When will you be in town?
… Today? … Well, no. I was just planning on… doing stuff,” Buffy looked at Spike
who was laughing at her and becoming aroused at her choice of words. He nodded
though and waved at her to make her plans. She smiled weakly at him and reached
for his hand again. He squeezed it as she finished her call.
“So this
afternoon? ... Just give me a shout before you get here so I know you’re coming,
okay? … Yeah, things are going… well between us…” Buffy blushed slightly, not
looking at Spike, and he knew they were talking about him.
“Alright, see
you later then.” She ended the call and turned back to him with a frown. “I was
looking forward to having a day with you.”
“It’s fine, luv. We’re going
to be all over each other tomorrow. She’s your agent; you need to see her. Isn’t
she an old friend of yours too?” he assured her as they finished their
breakfasts.
“My oldest and one of my dearest. Been there for me since
grade school,” she explained.
“Is she just comin’ to check in with you,
see what’s going on?”
Buffy frowned again. “Not quite. The visit is all
business, the seeing old friends thing is just a perk. Seems like I’ve been
getting some wiggy fan letters so she wants me to see them so I can determine if
we want to go to the cops. Which we don’t. I’m so sure I have a stalker or
something,” Buffy chuckled but Spike regarded her seriously.
“Buffy you
really shouldn’t take this lightly. This could be the work of some deranged fan,
who wants to get into your knickers. How many letters have there been?” He
asked.
Buffy shrugged. “No idea. Guess I’ll find out... but I’m sure
it’s just Willow overreacting. She does this sort of thing a lot.”
“Please, at least try to take this seriously? I’ve had my share
of strange fans. If they’re harmless then the letters just go into a file at the
police station for future reference, just in case. I keep a copy for my own
files and we don’t respond to them. They may be no threat most of the time but
every once in a while there is the nutjob that slips through. Did you tell
Willow about that guy at the club the night we performed?” he asked. From
Buffy’s guilty look he knew the answer. “Summers! Smarten up, would you?”
“What? He was just some guy wanting a date. It’s okay.” Truth was it all
scared her and she didn’t want to deal with it right now. She just wanted to
burn the letters and forget about the guy from the club. She was sure there was
nothing to worry about. There couldn’t be. No one would stalk her.
“You’re telling her about it, and that’s it,” Spike told her firmly.
When Buffy tried to protest he shook his head and cut her off. “No! And that’s
final. Just say there was this guy who was wonky at the club, tell her his name
and anything else you can remember. The letter person and this club guy might be
one in the same. I just don’t want to see you get hurt. Not just when I’ve found
out what a great kisser you are.”
Buffy gave him a small smile.
“Alright. I’ll tell her, twist my arm already.” She leaned across the table and
motioned for him to do the same, catching his mouth in a chaste kiss.
“Wills! It feels like it’s been forever since we’ve seen each other!” Buffy
exclaimed, to the petite redhead. Spike stood back after a quick introduction as
they two girls hugged and chatted for a few minutes, not wanting to interfere.
“I’m sorry it’s been awhile, especially since you’re my most favorite
client,” Willow teased Buffy. “But this IS business. I’ve brought the letters
for you to look at. I’ve talked to a few other people who have dealt with this
sort of stuff and they all say this isn’t something to be neglected.”
“It isn’t,” Spike spoke up for the first time, both girls looking at
him, surprised as they’d forgotten he was there. “And the letters aren’t the
only thing that’s been going on.”
Buffy gave Spike a murderous look but
he just shrugged in response. “Sorry, luv. I’m not leaving this to chance.”
“What’s he talking about Buffy?” Willow asked. Buffy sighed and led the
redhead over to the living room so they could talk. Willow sat in the armchair
while Buffy and Spike sat in the loveseat. Together and close, Willow noted
pleased. Then she turned back to business. “Well?”
“Okay. You know about
a week back when Spike and I had to spend time together, and that Saturday I
went to the club with him to watch his band perform?” Willow nodded. “Well later
that night I was waiting for a cab outside the bar, Spike had run back in for
something. I was waiting and some guy just came out of nowhere and asked me out,
was saying weird stuff about Spike and how he wasn’t any good and how I needed
someone to treat me right. He was just really creepy. I was on the plane with
him when I came out here to film the movie too. He had remembered me from there,
saw me at the club and wanted to talk to me. He was odd, yes, but I doubt this
is enough to call out the National Guard.”
“I’d beg to differ, Buffy.”
Spike said seriously. He turned to Willow and addressed her instead. “This is
the way these things start. A letter here, a weird visit there and all of a
sudden you have a full-fledged wanker on your hands.”
Willow nodded
again in agreement. “I know. These letters are odd, Buffy. There are quite a few
too, I really think we should do something about it.” She opened her bag and
pulled out a stack of envelopes the size of a tissue box and handed them over to
the two blondes. Buffy’s eyes widened when she saw how many there were.
“When did these all come? My god Willow, when I talked to you a couple
weeks ago you said you’d only gotten a few!” Buffy exclaimed, opening one up.
Spike took one as well and unfolded it.
“These have all just started
coming in the past week or so. Up to five a day. Most have an LA postmark, but
some are Iowa. I don’t know if there are two people or what but they’re getting
increasingly vulgar and threatening. I don’t like it.” Willow told her. Buffy
didn’t respond, reading instead.
“This one isn’t so bad,” Buffy told
her, referring to the letter she was holding. “They just sound like a fan.”
“They’re ordered from earliest to latest, top to bottom so the weirdest
ones are on the bottom,” Willow explained, her ordered nature coming out. Both
Buffy and Spike pulled a new letter from near the bottom of the stack and
started reading that instead.
Buffy’s mouth dropped open as she started
to read. “This person is perverted! And rude! I mean, sure, he loves me but THAT
isn’t cool. ‘I want to take you far away from here and lock you up somewhere
where I can look at you, smell you, fuck you until you can’t stand and then
you’ll love me the way that I love you. I’ll make you see how good it can be.’
Wow. Issues, much?” Buffy tried to laugh it off but shuddered, obviously shaken.
“This one isn’t any better, luv,” Spike told her, more pale than usual.
“This isn’t your run of the mill fan mail, Buffy. This is serious stuff. You
need to go to the police with these.”
“I just can’t get over this. I
mean, this isn’t a fan at all. They’re just weird.” Buffy threw her letter back
on the pile and handed the whole stack back to Willow. “I can’t read anymore.
Tell the police and give them those. What can they do anyway?”
“They’ll
open a file, take any new ones we get and try to track this person down. They
make some blatant threats in some of the letters so it’s not a case where we can
only wait and see. This person is unhinged.” Willow shoved the letters back in
her bag.
“Give her everything you know about that guy from the club
too,” Spike urged her. Buffy did so, trying to remember every little detail. She
seriously doubted that it was him though, just because these letters were
severely disturbed and the guy from the plane and the club was just a goof who
liked her. Right?
“Ladies, I’d love to stay and do girl talk but I think
it’s best that I leave you alone,” Spike told Buffy and Willow as he stood. He
leaned down and kissed Buffy on the head. “I’ll be in my room. It was nice to
meet you Willow.”
“Okay. I’ll see you in a bit,” she told him as he
walked out of her suite.
As soon as the door closed, Willow squealed and
launched herself over to the loveseat, eager for the entire scoop. “Well? What’s
going on?”
“We’re… really good friends,” Buffy laughed, giving her the
answer they’d decided on that very morning.
“Buffy!” Willow groaned,
hitting her friend lightly on the arm. “I’m you’re really good friend but you
don’t see me kissing you, or the air between us being thick with sexual
tension.”
“We didn’t kiss, Wills. It was a ‘see you later’ kiss.
It wasn’t even a kiss. It was a… a brush. And there’s no sexual tension
and there will be no cutting of it.”
“Oh my god! You already slept with
him! You tramp!” Willow yelled, bouncing in her seat. “Is he good? Is he big? Is
he hot naked? Oh, what do I care? I’m gay. Spill!”
“Willow, I swear to
you, I didn’t sleep with him. We’ve just….come to an arrangement. A decision. A
mutual understanding.”
“Jesus Buffy, it’s sex with a hot guy, not
investing in high-yield bonds.” Willow laughed. “Seriously, you guys are good?”
“Better than good. Stellar. Amazing. Hot. Fun. We’re everything.
He’s nice and sweet and kind and talented and he makes me think on my feet.
Hell, he knocks me off my feet. Literally, sometimes,” Buffy gushed.
Willow laughed at her, happy to see her best friend so excited. “That’s
great, Buffy. It’s about time something happened between the two of you. The way
things have been building I expected someone to find you going at it in a random
broom closet or else trying to kill each other with meat cleavers.”
“Believe me, at times it’s been a hard choice. He’s incredible though.
I’m glad this happened. I’ve been fighting this for so long and now that it’s
happened I think I’ve been – ”
“Stupid? Insane? In denial?” Willow
supplied.
“All of the above? We don’t have a label for what we are and
that’s great. I don’t want to define this. It’s about time Buffy Summers got her
head out of the sand and started living life, right?”
“Hear, hear!”
Willow clapped. “Exactly. This is what I’ve been telling you Buffy. You’ve been
kind of a prude lately. Just let this happen. And if it doesn’t work, it
doesn’t. You had a great experience, right?”
“Right,” Buffy replied but
inside she wondered, But what if it DOES work? Can I let him go?
“So this is goodnight?” She asked as they walked to her room, hand in hand. They
had just returned from dinner downstairs, having not left the hotel all day.
Willow had stayed for a couple hours that afternoon and then Spike and Buffy
talked out on his balcony, cuddling and sharing a kiss every now and then.
“I think so. We’ve had an… exciting day, wouldn’t you say? And we’ll be
in bed together all day tomorrow, so sleeping apart wouldn’t kill us for
one night, would it?” he reasoned.
She looked thoughtful for a moment.
“I don’t know. I’m coming to depend on you as my sleep-aid, you know. You’re
like my big, cuddly teddy bear to curl up with every night,” she told him
seriously.
He scowled at her. “For sayin’ that, you don’t get a
goodnight kiss.” He dropped her hand and started to walk away before she dragged
him back, laughing.
“Big Bad teddy bear, how about that?” she asked him.
He considered, and after some creative pouting on her part, he agreed. “Kiss
please.”
He obliged, happily before letting Buffy go reluctantly. She
leaned against her door, watching Spike as he backed up towards his. They took
out their keycards and swiped the locks at the same time.
“Night,” Buffy
called. Spike blew her a kiss in response. Both walked into their rooms with a
sigh and looked at their beds with heavy hearts, thinking of the warm body on
the other side of the wall.
She walked down the hallway to his room, unsure of how he would receive her. He
had told her no but maybe he would reconsider? Maybe.
She knocked
lightly, not sure if he would hear her. He did.
“What?” He snarled as he
opened the door. She jumped back a little at his response and also at his
attire. He was shirtless. Just jeans. With chest and no shirt and almost naked
and …chest. She swallowed hard.
“I – I uh – ” she stuttered.
“You what? You can’t hear properly? I told you goodnight, you go to your
room, I go to mine, hard concept? I didn’t think so.” He tugged her inside and
slammed the door, making her jump again. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m
sorry!” She yelled at him. “I just wanted to see you. I was lonely and tired and
thought that maybe I could sleep here. I didn’t know you’d be so angry to see my
face. I’ll leave then!”
As she turned to go something snapped in him. He
was beside her in two strides, pushing the door closed that she’d opened. “No.”
“Well what is it? Yes or no? Stay or go? Cause I’m here. I don’t know
where you are, but I’m here. Where I want to be.” She whispered to him. He was
close. Amazingly close. She could see his stubble, smell his soap, feel his
heat.
He lifted a hand to her cheek and caressed it, softly. She gasped
slightly at the barest touch. Taking this as encouragement he leaned down and
caught her mouth in a light kiss. He backed off, giving her time to refuse him.
She didn’t. He kissed her again, harder this time, and allowed his tongue to
slide between her lips. She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck tightly.
His hands found the hem of her shirt and slipped underneath, splaying on her
back.
She arched into his touch, letting her hands grab his hair to pull
him closer. They raked down his neck and back, leaving marks, he was sure. He
let his hands drift around to her sides, loving the smooth skin there.
“God, so hot, so soft…” he gasped.
She moaned into his mouth and
returned, “I want you so much!”
His hands tickled their way up her
sides, sending her into convulsions.
She pulled away and doubled over
and for a moment he thought he’d hurt her.
… until he heard a strangled
snort come from her.
“Bloody hell, Summers! You’re a sodding menace!”
Spike laughed at her, hauling her up so he could look into her laughing eyes.
Wesley sighed from offset and smiled at the couple. “Cut!”