Rating: R
Summary: Buffy and Angelus find themselves spending the night together...
Spoilers: I don't think so...but then I don't think, come to think of it...
Disclaimer: If I owned them don't you think that I'd have gotten Buffy and Angel back together by now...hmm? And the song is 'Hold Me' by Savage Garden - Affirmation
Note: This story takes place back in season 2 when Angelus was still around, but with no particular tie-in...

The night was still, save for the couple in a clearing amongst the trees...

Buffy kicked Angleus in the jaw, but was still reeling from the blow to the side of her head. He fell back slightly, but quickly recovered himself.

Why can't this just be over...? Buffy's heart cried out. Why does it have to be this way?

Argh! Why can't I just kill her, all ready?!?! Angelus thought.

They went for each other a second time, fists connecting with their jaws simultaneously, both recoiling from the synchronized blows.

And around them, the heavens opened up, and the rain began to fall...

Hey
If we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need this
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defenses
And secret hiding places

They just stood there, the rain seeping through their clothes.

Remembering...feeling...

Buffy could still feel his cold, gentle touch. Had it only been a month since that passion-filled night?

Angelus could remember her warm, agile body beneath him, surrounding him.

They were natural enemies, sworn to be the death of one another, but still, they wanted each other. More than that, they needed each other.

Slowly, the moved. Step by painstaking step, they came closer, until there was barely an inch between them.

And as if nothing else existed - not the past, not the future, and most definitely NOT the present - they grabbed each other in desperation, their lips meeting...mating...hungrily.

If only for tonight...

And around them, the rain continued to fall...

I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man

She lay, sleeping, in the cradle of his arms. Just like the first time, in that very apartment - in that very bed, full of memories. Only this time, he wasn't the same. He was the demon, the evil Angelus, not the soul-ridden Angel.

No, this time, she wouldn't have the chance to make him her faithful puppy. He sneered at the thought. She wouldn't make him feel like a human being again!

But as he gazed into her open, sleeping face, he felt his no-longer-beating heart melt. He ran his fingers through her hair, causing her to awaken.

Her eyes widened in realization, desperate to find a way out. But the look in his eyes stilled her, made her feel again, made her hope.

Something in her eyes made him feel panic. Not wanting to get himself caught in her trap, not wanting to acknowledge the very real feelings building inside him, he moved over her body once again, kissing her into oblivion...

Hey
More than angry words I hate this silence
It's getting so loud
Well I want to scream
But bitterness has silenced these emotions
It's getting hard to breathe
So tell me isn't happiness
Worth more than a gold diamond ring?
I'm willing to do anything
To calm the storm in my heart
I've never been the praying kind
But lately I've been down upon my knees
Not looking for a miracle
Just a reason to believe
I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man

She lay there, watching him sleep. He looked so peaceful, not at all like them evil demon that he was. Her enemy. But for tonight, they were together again. No, he wasn't her Angel, but in some ways, he was very much like him.

Buffy couldn't help but be reminded of happier times, when Angel had still been with her. Always at night. Together they were a couple, bonded by the night that was the key to their existence.

Patrolling, fighting the demons of the darkness, just spending time together, loving each other.

But now, they fought, not together, but each other. They didn't love. They weren't meant to. They were on auto-pilot. Vampire, Slayer, fight. So they did. That is what they had been reduced to. They fought because they were supposed to.

Tonight, they had taken back their lives, even if only for tonight. Later, they would be back to as before, enemies. No longer a loving couple.

Buffy banished all negative thoughts from her mind, snuggling back into Angelus' arms, feeling safe once more, knowing that their truce was only temporary, but also knowing that for tonight, he wouldn't dream of killing her.

Unconsciously, Angelus tightened his arms around her, needing her...

If only for tonight...

Do you remember not long ago?
When we used to live for the nighttime
Cherish each moment
Now we don't live we exist
We just run through our lives
So alone
That's why you've got to hold me

Dawn was approaching. He had known long before now. But somehow, he couldn't leave just yet. He didn't know what was going on between them, and for awhile, he hadn't cared, but as the cold light of day began to seep into his consciousness, reality intruded.

Nothing had changed, really. They were still mortal enemies. She still wanted her Angel, which he could never give her, and he still longed for the kill, not really something she could tolerate.

He stared at the pulse beat, just beneath the soft skin of her neck, debating for a moment whether to end their dilemma with a bite and some exchanged blood. He vamped out at the attractiveness of the thought.

The thought lost all of its appeal as he realized what she would become. His goddess of darkness. No, he didn't want that. He loved her as she was, the Slayer, with a beautiful heart and soul. Yes, he DID love her. It was a strange feeling for an extremely viscous, soulless demon.

He knew that he had to leave, fighting the urge to stay. He wouldn't turn her. She trusted him. This night would sustain him for a while, grateful for the chance to know her once more, knowing that their next meeting could mean either of their deaths.

He dressed quickly, not wanting to have to explain himself, not wanting her to know that she had tamed his demon self...

Their night was almost over...

Hey
If we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need them
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defenses
And secret hiding places

The lack of his cold body awakened her instantly. Her very essence cried out for him to never leave her, to return to her arms. But she knew that a war was raging inside him. Knew that she couldn't voice her need. For both their sakes, and the sake of the world.

She feigned sleep as he turned back to the bed. He bent over her and kissed her lips gently, whispering...

"Someday Buffy, you'll be my love eternally, I'll find a way."

The pain and determination in his voice undid her.

He turned away and walked to the door of the apartment, opening it slowly...

"Angelus..."

Came a whisper, in the wind...but he heard. He turned, seeing her standing only a few feet from him. As their eyes met, they relived their night together. Their pain, their need, their passion, their love.

And for the first time since Angelus had resurfaced, they both genuinely smiled. They continued to smile as he turned and walked out the door, leaving her there, where they had made more memories.

Their night had made them realize their true feelings. They still couldn't be together, but good or bad, they would forever yearn for, and love one another.

Maybe one day they would have their chance, but for now...

I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man

Go to the next story Alone Once Again

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