DISCLAIMER: I don't own them, I don't want them, they make me cry too much. Joss and his people do the owning thing
SPOILERS: Everything, just to be on the safe side.
TIMELINE: S5/S2
DISTRIBUTION: Great, just let me know where.
FEEDBACK: Please.
RATING: PG
AUTHOR'S NOTES: AU fic.. This takes place after my story *A Whole World of Regret*
DEDICATION: Rosi, Deirdre, Leisa, Sunny, Anat, Sara-lee.

Prologue

Five years have passed since the PTB diverted a meteorite from crashing into and destroying the earth, instead a chain of events - instigated by Glory and Angelus - brought about the *End of days*

After the battle was won, life for those left behind was never to be the same again.

Leaving a broken hearted Slayer behind, an unconscious Angel was whisked away to England and restored with a brand new existence. The vampire known as Angel/Angelus was washed away forever and in his place a twenty-seven year old English man called Liam Price was born.

TPTB were as good as their word about rewarding the soul and within a few weeks of arriving in London, to all those concerned, it was as if Liam Price had never been anybody else. Memories of a happy childhood replaced the nightmares of reality and, so that he wouldn't be totally alone in this new world, memories of Wesley were installed as part his family. Only Wesley and his friends in Sunnydale would remember the truth about the vampire's past. Buffy Summers had been quite adamant that her memories would not be taken away from her and, after her sacrifice, the Oracles had agreed it was not necessary.

She alone would carry the pain of separation and since she accepted this, TPTB were happy to leave things as they were.

So, once Angel's new body had finally recovered from the ordeal of re-birth, the twenty-seven-year-old human simply woke up one morning and accepted the memories of his new life without question. To all concerned Liam Price had never been anything other than.......... Liam Price.

This story picks up five years later

Part One.

London.
2006

Angel gazed blearily at the computer screen trying desperately to make his tired brain remember exactly which of the artifacts listed had to be included for the following week's exhibition. Removing his designer framed glasses, the thirty-two year old research manager rubbed the tension from his strained eyes with a weary but satisfied sigh of relief.

Turning away from the screen, Angel stood up from his chair and stretched the cramp from his long muscular legs. It really had been one hell of a hard week, but that wasn't unusual in his line of work. The week before had been just as bad, and the month before that, and etc etc.

Angel like hard work, in fact he thrived on it but, as much as he loved his job, sometimes the pressure seemed to swallow up every waking hour. Everyday was the same, work, work, work and if he was really lucky, a little sleep at the end of it. However, that was the price he was willing to pay to do a job that he loved. The paper work was a pain but he got the chance to travel all around the world visiting excavation sites and museums and that alone made up for the drudgery.

Walking over to the large window behind his desk, he stood quietly letting the sights of a busy London rush hour wash over him. So many forgettable faces all heading in different directions, each so tied up in their own little world that they hardly noticed the person standing two feet away. The twenty-first century had turned human life into a frantic rat race and, from the evidence that passed by his window, it was spiraling more and more out of control, heading on a destructive path that would one day implode. Liam Price didn't much like the hustle and bustle of this century, he was much happier surrounded with dusty old artifacts from the past. His friends at school had joked he was born out of his time and, on days like these, he tended to agree with them.

The small knock on the office door brought his attention away from the outside world and back into the warmth of his office.

"Mr. Price, I'm off home now, I just wanted to remind you about the underground strike tonight. The buses are really crowded and it looks like you might have trouble getting home" Angel's personal assistant popped her head around the door with a warm friendly smile.

"Thanks, Marie. It completely slipped my mind" Angel sighed heavily at the prospect of walking the five miles home

It was at times like these that he missed being able to drive his car to work, but nobody drove into the city these days. Too many cars and far too much pollution had brought about the ban the previous year. Now public transport had the upper hand and periodically brought the capital's work force to its knees. It really was becoming a crazy world.

"Maybe you shouldn't stay so late tonight" the woman offered again knowing that if *Liam* didn't leave soon he would have no chance of getting a ride home.

Marie Temple was fifty-two years old, married with three grown children. She had worked at the British museum as a personal assistant for over twenty years and, in all that time, she could honestly say that she had never enjoyed her work more. Liam Price was the perfect employer and the P.A fussed over him more like a son than a superior.

Marie was always reminding the handsome young man that he needed to eat a better diet, he needed to take a lot more rest and at thirty-two years old, he seriously needed to find himself a wife. The nagging always came with genuine affection so it was taken as it was offered. Angel would laugh back that he ate when he was hungry, he rested when his eyes no longer stayed open and as far as a wife was concerned, how was that possible when the best ones were already taken. Knowing the reply would make her blush and keep her off his back, the subject was always changed for another week.

Marie thought it was a terrible shame that such a nice young man was so often alone, she knew many of the female staff at the museum would have happily volunteered for the job of Mrs.Price. At a little over six feet tall, with chiselled good looks, deep-set dark eyes, and an athletically muscular physique, to say that Angel stood out in the crowd would have been a gross understatement. Angel left the crowd standing far behind and the fact that he didn't even notice only added to the charm.

When he had first stated at the museum almost five years ago he had dated a few of his colleagues but it had never lasted longer than a few weeks. The rejected girls all accused him off being cold and afraid of commitment but Marie knew that was not the case. There was sadness about the man that she couldn't quite put her finger on, it was as if he was looking for something but didn't quite know what it was. Liam Price wasn't so much lonely as alone, and as she grew to understand him better, the Personal Assistant accepted that the man actually preferred it that way

"Will you be going to the Head of Departments' party tomorrow?" she asked as she buttoned her coat for her own journey home.

"No, my cousin Wesley's back in town. I have this rule that family always comes first and considering he's the only family I have, that rule is not too hard keep " Angel's genuine smile reached deep into his eyes as he leant over for his briefcase.

Wesley had been out of the country for three months this time and it would be good catching up all the news. One of these days he really would have to visit the United States and see what was keeping his only family member away for such long periods of time. Angel had his suspicions, probably a girl and knowing Wesley as well as he did, it was probably a very pretty girl. The thought of his cousin in love made him happy.

"Have a nice weekend then" Marie's smile broke through his musing as she turned and left the office.

After his assistant had left, Angel filled his case with unfinished paper work and decided to call it day. If he couldn't get the train home, he was in for a hell of a long walk. And, just looking out the window told him the weather was not going to be kind to anyone walking tonight.

Stepping into the cold night air, he pulled up the collar on his thick dark overcoat, curled his fingers tightly around the handle of his briefcase and walked in the direction of Tottenham Court road tube station

Marie had been right about their journey home, the buses were all filled to capacity with people imitating sardines. On reaching the underground station, Angel found the gates heavily locked. With nothing else for it, he dropped his head against the bitter wind and started the long walk home.

One hour later, depressed and frozen to the marrow, Angel turned off of the heavily lit main street and headed down a darkened alley he knew would cut his journey by half a mile. As his soft footsteps trod carefully through the darkness a bloodcurdling scream filled the alley. Angel recognised the cry of a woman and without even thinking, he sprinted forward to help.

A few yards down, a small-terrified girl was frantically fighting off her attacker but it was painfully obvious that the man, holding her by the throat, was far too strong for his victim. Angel seethed with rage at the sight; he raised his briefcase and brought it down hard across the attacker's back. The force of the impact should have knocked the bastard out cold, but instead the large dark figure dropped the girl, turned straight at Angel and growled.

"What the hell?" Angel stepped back in surprise at seeing what he could have sworn were yellow eyes, stalked menacingly towards him. Before he got a chance to take a closer look, the small victim stepped forward and thrust a large wooden cross at her attacker. The figure with yellow eyes growled once more and then turned, fleeing into the night.

Watching the threat disappear, the frightened girl closed her eyes and slumped back against the wall with a muffed sob of relief.

For a second Angel found he couldn't move. But, realising that the girl was possibly hurt, he quickly forgot all thoughts of those yellow eyes and turned his full attention on helping her.

"Are you all right? What on earth did he want, money?" Angel asked as he walked the young woman towards the safety of the well-lit street ahead.

"I'm fine, thank you for your help, you were very brave" she looked up and smiled a flash of brilliant white teeth

Now they were in a better light, Angel could see into the girl's face for the first time. She was young, probably still in her teens and yet her worldly eyes belied her age. With thick dark hair and eyes the colour of ebony the word *gypsy* whispered into Angel 's head without even thinking it.

"You really should be more careful, Miss. It's not always safe to be out on your own… Hey, did he bite you?" Angel 's eyes fell onto the two small puncture marks on her slim throat. "Good God, the guy must have been high on something"

** The damn junkie must have been really desperate to attack a child** he reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a crisp white hankie. Passing it to the girl he watched as she pressed it to her neck

"You saved me from the darkness, my family will bless you" the large black eyes sparkled with gratitude as her blood stained the fresh white linen.

"Do you need to see a doctor? I really think we should report this to the police" Angel asked with concern. Although the bleeding seemed to have stopped he was worried about the possibility of delayed shock.

**You read about it all the time, how the victim seemed fine one moment and then..…**

Before he got a chance to complete his thought, Angel was taken completely by surprise as the girl raised a small slender hand and with a single stroke of her fingertips, brushed his cheek.

"You have the face of an Angel, a young face but it hides an old soul" her eyes locked on to the handsome stranger but she immediately felt all was not as it seemed. There was something very false with the picture in front of her, but it was not an evil facade. The soul of this man was of the purest form; not a single sin stained his essence. That in itself was what was wrong.

Angel stood and watched in fascination as the girl lifted his hand and lightly traced her finger across his skin, exploring the fine lines that criss-crossed his palm.

"You have a very long life line, unusually long" her small voice whispered into the cold night air, her warm breath frosting as she spoke.

Instinct told Angel to withdraw his hand; fortune telling wasn't something he had a great deal of time for, but as the young girl changed direction he seemed drawn to her words.

"Your heart line is badly broken, it's torn and scattered to the winds of time." A deep sadness entered the voice at witnessing such pain

Angel didn't move, he knew without question that she was mistaken. He had never had his heart broken because sadly, he had never been in love.

"Her world is empty without you, the sacrifice was brave but the hunger never leaves her heart" the gypsy girl continued to read the lines on Angel's palm with an almost quizzical expression. The more she read about the brave stranger the less she understood.

"Who needs me?" Angel found himself whispering the question and then cursed himself for being so stupid.

**This was all nonsense. He was cold, hungry and he really should be heading towards home **

"She still fights but she is all alone, there is something missing from both of your worlds" the girl abruptly dropped Angel 's hand and pressed her own palm flat against his chest. Looking directly into his eyes, the seriousness In her voice startled him.

"You shouldn't be here, it wasn't your choice"

Angel shuddered and then pulled himself together. It was ridiculous that such a small girl could affect him so powerfully. Then again, that was all part of a gypsy's charm so maybe he shouldn't have been so surprised after all.

Stepping back, he watched her small hand fall away without further protest

"Are you sure you didn't knock your head?" Angel asked as sensitively as he could, the girl was making little sense and he feared that maybe she was more hurt than he had first thought.

"You are a good man and I bless you " the girl reached up and pressed her lips to his cheek but instead of the expected kiss she whispered against his ear.

" Believe in your heart even when your head refuses to accept the inconceivable " on that last note she turned and disappeared into the night.

Angel stood and watched until she was completely out of sight.

**You saved me from the darkness, my family will bless you** for no apparent reason the words returned and no matter how hard he tried to shake them, they danced in his head for the rest of the cold journey home.

Part Two

Los Angeles.

Three months earlier….

"Angel Investigations. We help when the rest run and hide " Cordelia sang sweetly into the phone as she swung around on her swivel chair. Rolling her eyes, she immediately pulled the receiver a good six inches away from her ear and wrinkled her nose.

"Hey buddy, maybe you could just lower that hysterical screaming by a decibel or two?" the sugary act was forgotten as the part time actress yelled back over the shrilling coming from the ear piece.

Cordelia continued to hold the receiver at a safe distance from her ear while the terrified caller rambled incoherently, she only brought it closer when four little words seemed to scream out clearer than any of the others.

"Money is no object" **Those were words she appreciated**

With a large smile, the dark haired woman turned her full attention on the potential *paying* client.

Cordelia Chase had a true gift when it came to deciphering hysterical, over the years she had got it down to a fine art, as long as it didn't burst her eardrum that was. When the noise became more bearable, she grabbed her notebook and, after muttering a few questions back, started scribbling down the details.

On the street outside, Wesley paid off the taxi and walked up to the large glass office door. Before entering, he took a quiet moment to stare fondly at the now familiar silver Angel that hung above the entrance.

Wesley remembered only too well the first time he had seen it. It had been almost four years ago now, the first time he had returned to Los Angeles after the *End of Days*. The funny little Angel had almost been the death of him; he had choked so hard. But, as time had gone by, Wesley had become accustomed to the tragic looking figure swinging over the doorway and nowadays when he thought of A.I, it was one of the few things that made him smile.

Looking in at the large bright office, Wesley found himself feeling strangely melancholic. Just for the briefest moment he longed for the good old/bad old days, when it had been just the three of them against the world.

** But, those days were gone forever, they had all moved on to different destinies and that's just how it had to be** he angrily reminded himself, bringing the self-pity he was feeling to an abrupt end.

His destiny had been seeing his friend reborn into his new life; helping Angel grow as a new person. The fight to clear up the demon stragglers had been left to the others.

When Cordelia and Gunn had returned after the end of days, a lot of decisions had to be made for the future and one of those decisions was continuing the work that Angel had started. As the Oracles had stated, there were still plenty of angry demons roaming the earth, looking for a fight.

After a lot of soul searching, what was left of the small band decided to go for a new office. If they were ever going to lay their ghosts to rest, they had to make a fresh start. When a suitable building was found, Cordelia had insisted on only one thing, that the new office held some kind of remembrance to their old friend. At the time the others had happily agreed, a small plaque on the wall sounded nice, but Cordelia had other ideas and when she arrived with the sliver painted Angel nobody had the heart to refuse her wish.

"It had three heads? That’s unusual they normally only have two" Fully engrossed in the conversation, Cordelia continued to scribble as Wesley pushed open the office door and walked quietly inside. He observed in total silence as his one time colleague calmed the fears of the terrified client.

"No, that’s not a problem. Believe me, we have dealt with far worse in our time" her beautiful dark eyes rolled at the thought. A three-headed gremlin was nothing compared to some of the horrors they had seen.

On noticing Wesley's arrival Cordelia's face beamed in delight, she held up her hand indicating the call was coming to an end and proceeded to wrap it up, promising that her colleague, Mr. Gunn, would be over straight away.

"When did you get in? Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" she launched herself from the desk and wrapped her arms around Wesley so tightly that he almost had trouble breathing.

"My, my. That's what I call a greeting, just remind me to go away more often" he laughed as he hugged the soft warm body back, his hand gently caressing her shoulders.

Cordelia pulled back slightly as Wesley untangled their limbs and let his eyes sweep over the beauty in front of him, searching for any sign of change since their last meeting. If anything, she was even lovelier if that was at all possible. **A little tired around the eyes though** came an afterthought as Cordelia moved into a brighter light.

For a few moments the two old friends just stood smiling at each other, each waiting for the other to speak

"So...How is he?" Cordelia eventually asked the one question that they agreed could be asked.

Five years ago the whole group had agreed that Wesley should never disclose what had become of Angel. That way the temptation to peek at his new life wouldn't become too strong. Each one knew they could never be apart of that life and it was for the best that it never be talked about. Still, saying that, Cordelia always asked and Wesley always replied with the same.

"Last time I saw him he was doing just fine." The reply as always, was quick, to the point and then finished with. Satisfied with the only answer she was ever going to receive, Cordelia accepted it and turned away from the sadness that still touched her heart. Even after all this time, she still mourned the loss of her *family*. Wesley hated seeing that sadness in her eyes but, he truly believed that keeping Angel's identity unknown was best for all those concerned. After five years the last thing they needed was boat rocking.

Turning his head away, Wesley was more than happy to change the subject

"Is she in?" he asked looking towards the closed door behind Cordelia's desk that lead to a second room.

Oh yeah, she got back about an hour ago, not a pretty sight" Cordelia nodded and winced slightly.

Wesley took a step towards the office door

"Just a little warning, large brooding going down in there at the moment" Cordelia offered helpfully as Wesley reached for the door handle. He then stopped and rapped his knuckles softly on the light wooden door, waiting for an answer.

"I guess some things never change around here" he replied as a quiet voice, from the other side of the door, called for him to come in. Cordelia rolled her eyes as the door closed behind him and picked up the phone, after dialing a few numbers she waited for the other end to be picked up and grabbed her note book.

"Its me, we just got a new client. There's a three headed gremlin in the West Side sewer system and I told the guy you were already on your way" Cordelia couldn't resist smiling at the deep groaning noise coming from the other end of the line.

**Gunn was not a happy man** But, for once Cordelia Chase didn't care.

Wesley was home for a few months, they had a new client and for a change she wasn't the one getting covered in the demon yuck

**Maybe life wasn't that bad after all**

*****

As Wesley closed the door behind him he noticed that the light in this office was a lot dimmer than the one outside. Across the room an enormous leather chair spun around and the inhabitant greeted him with a gasp of surprise.

"Wesley, I didn't know you were in town" Large hazel eyes sparkled at her visitor.

"Hello Buffy" Wesley smiled back in awe at the beautiful woman the Slayer had grown into. No longer a skinny child, the woman now facing him had matured and grown more beautiful than anybody could have imagined possible. Wrapped in only a large fluffy bathrobe and with a head full of damp golden curls, Buffy Summers looked amazing but also very tired.

"You look exhausted, you and Cordelia have both been working far too hard" Wesley's kind face smiled but there was real concern behind his troubled eyes. He made himself a silent promise to talk to Gunn as soon as possible.

Buffy ran her fingers through her damp hair, shaking the water droplets from the ends, the soft curls framed her perfect face giving it an almost angelic glow in the dim light.

"I took out a whole vampire nest tonight, and a couple of slaaiinm demons. Boy, are they disgusting, when you cut off their heads they......"

"They spray you from head to toe with a foul blue grunge " Wesley finished the sentence for her with a large beaming grin.

**That explained the bathrobe and the desperate need for a shower**

Wesley had once had the misfortune of coming face to face with one of those demons, and the smell, if not disposed of right away, would linger for weeks.

He could tell, even across the office, that Buffy had made it to the shower on time, the sweet smell of soap and shampoo was all that filled the air.

"Once a Watcher always a Watcher" the Slayer laughed at the depth of Wesley's knowledge. After Giles, there was nobody around that knew as much as Wesley when it came to demonology. Although, saying that, Cordelia came in a very close third these days.

"So, how long do we have your company for this time?" Buffy stood from behind the desk and walked across the office. Wesley looked up and he could see from the expression in her eyes that she was dying to ask a multitude of questions just like Cordelia always did. The only difference with Buffy was, he knew she wouldn't ask them, she carried the pain of her decision silently. It was only on moments like this, when the pain shone from her eyes, that she allowed her guard to drop down; even then, she would never ask that one question she was dying to know. **What had become of the love of her life**

"I have two months here in LA and then I have to see Mr. Giles about a very important council matter. Come on, tell me everything that's happened in the last few months, spill all the gossip" Wesley smiled relieved that their meeting had once again passed without Angel questions getting in the way.

Later that night, Wesley and Cordelia found themselves sitting in a small restaurant a few blocks down from the office, quietly rehashing old dreams. After the good old days had been re-written and re-lived the conversation eventually turned to Buffy

"She looks amazingly well, despite the fatigue" Wesley deliberated as he lifted his fork to his mouth.

"She never sleeps" Cordelia replied honestly as she stirred her own half-eaten pasta. She moved the food slowly around the plate but paid little interest to its content.

The restaurant they had chosen was almost empty at that time of night and although the food was delicious, after a long day and an almost equally long night, Cordelia's appetite had known better days.

Wesley didn't have the same problem, he was ravenous. The food on his plate was a hundred times better than anything offered on the long flight over and he was enjoying every mouthful.

" Bad Dreams?" he finally asked as he laid his cutlery next to his empty plate. It made sense that the Slayer would suffer with nightmares, he had had his fair share of those over the last five years. There were some images that no matter how hard you tried, never quite faded from sight.

Wesley looked across the table at his companion and watched as she carefully considered the question.

"I don't know, she wouldn't tell me even if she was" Cordelia admitted sadly and pushed her plate away. Within seconds a hovering waiter swept down and cleared the dirty dishes.

Declining desert and accepting the offer of coffee, the waiter disappeared leaving them to continue the conversation.

"I thought you two were close now" Wesley reached across the table and filled Cordelia's empty wine glass

"We are on most things but the Angel subject is still taboo, we never speak of him. It makes me so angry sometimes because dammit I want to talk about him, I need to talk about him. He was my friend not just her lover" Cordelia lowered her voice realising that in the almost empty room, it had travelled a lot further than she would have wanted it too.

"Perhaps the whole issue is still too painful for her" Wesley replied as sympathetically as he could without appearing to take sides. Playing pig in the middle was never his idea of fun.

Cordelia wasn't having any of it.

"Please! If it was only that simple." Her dark eyes suddenly flashed releasing a pent up bitterness that had no other outlet

"Oh no, that's not it at all. Willow's name is always popping up in conversation and I've even heard the odd *Spike would have said that*on occasion, but if I utter the *A* word it's like... hello the lights are on but there's nobody home" Cordelia lifted her wine glass and angrily gulped at the liquid. Placing the empty glass back on the table she lifted her tired eyes apologetically towards her companion.

"Sorry, it's been a long week, and that really wasn't fair" her voice softened as she reflected on the outburst. Cordelia knew that if she really thought about it, it wasn't Buffy she was angry with, it was just fate in general.

If she was really honest with herself, she was desperately worried about her friend. She had already lost Angel and it seemed these days Buffy was slipping away from her as well

"Wesley nodded that he understood her frustrations only too well, but human beings were all different and some took longer to recover than others.

"Maybe taking Angel's place here wasn't such a good idea after all." He offered with a sad smile.

Five years earlier it had seemed the perfect solution to all their problems, what with the hellmouth closed and Buffy needing to fill a gap as wide as the grand canyon in her life. The Slayer had eagerly accepted the offer to work with Cordelia and Gunn and run Angel investigations as a team. But with hindsight, they should have known that Buffy would struggle.

**How was she supposed to let go of the past when she was still walking in his footsteps? **

Reaching across the table he lifted Cordelia's slender hand and cradled it lovingly between his fingers. As he gazed at the woman he loved with a deep passion, an icy chill covered his heart. Cordelia felt him tremble and reached out her other hand, softly caressing his face.

"What's wrong?" her eyes imitated the same deep unspoken feelings.

Wesley sighed deeply unable to hide the frustration that left a bitter taste in his mouth.

"They both gave up the world to make the other happy and yet here we are five years later and they're both as lonely as hell. It just seems so wrong, it's such a dreadful waste of love"

Cordelia nodded, that was the problem in a nutshell. **Buffy was desperetly lonely and from what Wesley had just dropped, so was the new Angel**

"So...What do we do about it?" her beautiful dark eyes flashed with mischief.

Wesley shrugged his shoulders in complete ignorance 0

"I wish I knew"

Part Three

London.

**Home at last **

Wesley sighed with heartfelt gratitude as he turned the key in his frozen fingers and unlocked the front door.

Dragging his bulky luggage inside the small hallway of the house he shared with Angel, he pushed the heavy wooden door closed behind him and facetiously promised never to leave home again.

**Well, at least not for a week or two** the ghost of a smile crossed his tired lips. After the trip he'd just had, there simply wasn't enough energy in his exhausted body to try anything more strenuous.

Having been on the road for over eight hours straight, driving back from the new Watchers' council, Wesley's only concern now was for a long hot shower and twenty-four hours sleep

Leaving his abandoned luggage by the doorway, he entered the darkened living room and reached for the table lamp. As his fingers fumbled in the darkness for the switch, a muffled sob caused Wesley to hesitate. The unexpected sound triggered years of uneasiness, at 3 o'clock in the morning the house should have been as quiet as the grave.

Standing foolishly in the dark, Wesley allowed a few seconds to pass before reassuring himself that it was only his overactive imagination and not a blood-sucking fiend searching for an early morning snack. As his fingers reached once more for the light switch, a much louder cry stopped him cold.

"Okay, so it's an ex blood-sucking fiend" he muttered into the darkness and smiled in relief

On recognising the voice, the next thought that crossed Wesley's mind was that Angel had got lucky and had finally brought a girl home for the night, but as the noise grew louder he recognised the difference between a cry of passion and a cry of despair. This was definitely the latter, his best friend and so called *cousin* sounded deeply distressed.

At first Wesley felt uncomfortable, as if he was eavesdropping on a conversation not meant for him but, after a few seconds, the disturbing noise became almost impossible to ignore.

Leaving the house in total darkness, Wesley carefully made his way along the familiar hallway and climbed the stairs. It was an old house and the landing floorboards creaked out loudly no matter how softly he trod. Angel had always been a light sleeper and on any other night, the creaking would have been sufficient enough to wake him, but not this night.

Turning to his left, Wesley could see that the door to Angel's bedroom was slightly ajar and the heavy lined curtains were pulled back, allowing the pale moonlight to dance across the sleeping man's troubled features.

Moving a few steps forward, he watched in wide eyed horror as his friend, covered in thin layer of sweat and deeply asleep, rocked back and forth in apparent agony. Angel's incoherent rambling started to transform into actual words and, as the words became clearer, they left Wesley dumbfounded.

"Angel…Old soul...Needs me.... " Angel thrashed wildly in his sleep as if the illusions were actually causing him pain. Each new word he mumbled only seemed to increase the torment.

"It wasn't my choice… It wasn't my choice… Angel…face of an angel" as the torrent of words flowed faster, Angel's new memories struggled to keep their hold on his mind. His new existence was under a heavy attack and his whole body seemed to be battling the alien thoughts invading his subconscious.

Wesley was torn, he knew technically that you should never waken somebody from such a traumatic nightmare and yet the look on his friend's face was terrifying. Something powerful was filling Angel's head with words and visions he should never be remembering. Wesley dithered, his curiosity split between waking his friend and watching to see what happened next.

With one last heart wrenching cry, Angel solved the dilemma for him, he sat straight up in bed ripping the sheets from his sweat drenched body, as if the fabric was slowly suffocating him.

After taking a few seconds to gain his bearings, Angel focused his eyes on the dark shape hovering in the doorway.

"Wesley? Is that you?" he gasped as he fought for breath. In his chest, his erratic heart beat so fast it threatened to explode

Wesley just nodded; he wasn't capable of speech, he felt as if he had just woken from his own worse nightmare.

The word Angel had cried out so hard it had woken him from his deep sleep was impossible…Without a shadow of a doubt, Angel had cried for Buffy.

*****

The following morning, Angel was sitting drinking coffee when Wesley finally pulled himself from his room. Already exhausted from his long drive, Wesley had spent the rest of the night desperately trying to ring LA.

When there had been no reply at either the office or Cordelia's apartment, he resisted leaving a message on the machine for fear of freaking his friends, especially Buffy. The last thing he needed was the Slayer finding out that after five long years, the Oracles' deal had gone pear shaped. Wesley knew there would be plenty of time for freaking if Angel's memory really had returned.

**Boy, was he going to be pissed** Wesley ran his hand over his hair as he looked through his old address book, searching for more phone numbers. It didn't make any sense, Angel remembering anything from his past life; demon or human should have been impossible. The Oracles, when they had granted Angel his new humanity, had promised that every single memory had been washed away. And yet, last night, he had definitely cried out his old lover's name.

**Buffy**

There could be no mistaking whom the name belonged too

**Christ, how many Buffys were there in his world**

In his desperation for answers, Wesley had then tried calling Giles in Sunnydale but the answering machine had just switched on relaying the message that he was out of town for a few days.

With a heavy heart and no sleep, Wesley went downstairs to face the music

Angel smiled brightly as his *cousin* walked over to join him for breakfast.

"I didn't expect to find you home this week, you said you were heading off to Egypt for an exhibition" Wesley carefully watched Angel's face for any small sign of remembrance, but the face of the man seated opposite him was a picture of normality.

The ex-vampire sat at the breakfast table in a white T-shirt and blue jeans happily working his way through a hearty meal of bacon, sausage, eggs, and all the trimmings. As Wesley hesitantly approached the table, Angel snatched up a piece of warm toast from the rack, snaked it threw his egg and bit into it hungrily.

"That's next week, I leave on Friday." he replied as his teeth again attacked what was left of his toast.

Wesley stood still for a few seconds, feeling slightly uncomfortable after what he had witnessed the night before. The scene in front of him seemed strangely surreal.

"And how are you feeling this morning?" he asked carefully, as he pulled out a chair and waited for the torrent of questions he was positive would be thrown at him, but Angel just continued digging into his breakfast.

"Me?...Great thanks...Do you want some tea?" he offered, gesturing in the direction of the small black pot in the middle of the table.

Wesley was thrown; this wasn't what he'd expected at all. One moment he was crying out for an ex lover that in his mind should never have existed, and now, he was "Mr. Not A Care in the World" guy offering the beverage of the day.

Wesley decided to go straight for the truth, at least that way they could get it out in the open.

"That was some nightmare last night" he dipped his toe further into dangerous waters and waited for it to be bitten off at the knee but, there was still no bite.

"Nightmare? I don't remember having a nightmare. I did had the strangest dream though, can't remember it very clearly, one of those dreams with scrambled pictures and not much logic but, there was this girl" Angel's thoughts trailed off as if savouring the moment.

**Her hair had been the colour of golden sunlight as it trailed silkily across his naked chest, then the reddest, sweetest lips pulled at ....... **

"I think that gypsy girl I helped last night really got into my head, although it wasn't her, the girl in my dreams was blonde, body to die for" Angel smiled as a warm feeling spread all through his own body.

"Wait? What gypsy girl?" Wesley choked on his tea, spilling its contents across the table.

Angel started at the beginning and explained all about his eventful walk home.

" I think she felt sorry for me, maybe she could read in my hand that I haven't been laid for a while" this time Angel actually laughed at the thought and the laughter made Wesley even more nervous.

**This wasn't the same Liam Price he had come to know over the last five years**

"And then what?" he demanded a little more curious then was necessary. Wesley didn't like this gypsy aspect one little bit, these people possessed magic's more powerful than he understood. After all, it was a gypsy that had cursed Angelus all those years ago. Even though Angelus was never coming back, the thought of gypsy magic around the once vampire made him jittery.

"She blessed me....I just have no idea what she blessed me with, she said I was lonely, so maybe she sent the dream I had last night" Again Angel's face beamed like a lovesick schoolboy as he remembered how the nameless blonde girl had wrapped her arms around his body and…

"And if that's the case I'm more than grateful"

*****

Later that morning

"Are we still eating out tonight, only I need to spend a few hours at the museum " Angel called searching in his briefcase but failing to find the papers he needed.

He really didn't want to go into his office today but, if the papers were not signed and returned before Monday, heads would roll, and more importantly, his Egyptian trip could be in jeopardy

"Sure, I'm going to be busy most of the day myself" Wesley shouted back down the stairs while still trying to dial the number of Cordelia's cell phone.

"Where the hell are you?" he muttered almost angrily as the call went unanswered for the millionth time.

Downstairs and totally oblivious to the worry, Angel continued with his daily routine without a care in the world.

"Right, where do you want to meet up? What about that pub in Shaftsbury Avenue? He offered knowing that it was close enough to walk to ** if those goddamn trains started playing up again**

Without even thinking, Wesley agreed to the location. In all honesty, at that moment in time, food was the last thing on his mind as he hit the redial button.

Later on in his life, whenever he remembered that conversation, the words *frying pan* and *fire* would always return and bite him on the arse...

Part Four.

Buffy walked from the Palace Theatre, clutching her souvenir program tightly to her chest, and sighed deeply as a shock of cold wind swept over her warm body bringing her back to reality. The whole evening had been the most magical experience and for the first time in a very long while, her birthday had been something to enjoy, and not endure.

"So, I take it that you enjoyed the show?" Giles asked as they wove their way to the crowded exit and headed for the darkened street. Buffy looked up and smiled, her face a mixture of emotions.

"It was beautiful, so sad and tragic but yet...." her voice faded as the haunting aria replayed in her memory.

**The struggle, the hopelessness, the sacrifice and the undying love**

"Not too sad, I hope?" Giles seemed a little alarmed, he had hoped the night out would give Buffy a lift of spirits, knowing what a difficult time of year her birthday was.

The trip to London had been a last minute idea and the tickets to Les Miserables had seemed a perfect night out.

Returning to England was something Rupert Giles always looked forward to and when Wesley had informed him that a new Watchers council was being formed, intrigue had got the better of him.

In the same conversation Wesley had let slip that Angel was safely out of the county, visiting Egypt. Taking this information into careful consideration, Rupert Giles decided to kill two birds with one stone. Buffy's birthday would be the perfect time to see his homeland.

Walking arm in arm along the crowed London Street, Giles stopped to hail a black cab.

"I'll drop you off at the hotel first if that's all right, I have.."

"A red hot date" Buffy finished as her dear friend blushed three different shades of pink in the cool night's air.

Giles nodded feeling slightly guilty, he hated leaving Buffy alone in a strange city, even one as lovely as London.

Buffy just laughed and assured him she was a big girl now and quite capable of amusing herself for a few hours, without getting into too much mischief.

"Dating is always good, its about time you saw some action" she squeezed his arm tighter and when he looked into her eyes, they were smiling.

"Its not a date, oh who am I fooling, of course it’s a date" he grinned back excitedly and in that moment he looked years younger.

As the taxi pulled into the rank Giles started to move Buffy forward. After a few footsteps she stopped and politely refused the offer of a lift

"I think I'll walk if you don't mind, I need a little air and the sights at night time are spectacular" Buffy smiled and after reassuring her friend that she was perfectly safe, she waved him off and wished him luck. Turning up the collar of her light weight mac to protect her ears against the frosty night breeze, Buffy headed off down Shaftesbury Avenue.

***

Angel couldn't breath.

One moment he was happily running down the Shaftesbury Avenue, dodging the Theatre goers while his head experimented with a dozen different excuses for why he was so late and the next, it was as if a vacuum had sucked all the oxygen from his lungs.

He knew he had to look ridiculous, standing in the middle of the crowded street gaping like a goldfish that had jumped its bowl but, once his mouth had fallen open he simply couldn't move.

On the other side of the street stood the girl of his dreams…literally.

Standing with a man old enough to be her father, Angel found his body burning up with irrational jealousy. He watched as the small blonde woman clung to the other man's arm as they waited for a taxi and then found himself almost ecstatic with joy when she waved the cab goodbye and moved off down the street alone.

All thoughts of meeting Wesley were forgotten as Angel found himself following the object of his dream down the street. The rational part of his brain knew how stupid he was being, the girl was a complete stranger and he was almost stalking her, but no matter how he argued, he couldn't pull away.

A nagging fear deep in his subconscious kept repeating that if he didn't find out who she was, he would regret if for the rest of his life.

Angel knew without a doubt that they had never crossed paths before, he wouldn't have forgotten a body as wonderful as that in a hurry but even knowing that, everything about her felt so familiar. There was something about the way she moved, how her hips swayed and her hair bobbed around her shoulders. Angel found himself fantasising that if he ran his tongue over her skin he was certain it would taste of sunshine and vanilla.

**Oh, God. What a thought** he mused feeling even more ridiculous.

That thought alone should have been enough to kick sense into the normally rational man, but Angel was way beyond being rational.

As the girl quickened her pace he found himself falling further behind, on turning the street corner Angel was horrified to discover he'd lost her completely.

Standing in a busy street surrounded by people, Angel had never felt so alone in all his life. And then she was there again, moving through the tide of faces like a mirage in the desert. He watched as she turned off the main street looking almost lost, and instead of turning right, she headed down a side alleyway. Angel ran, remembering only too well the events of the previous night. Girls and dark alleys were trouble in the asking.

Buffy knew she was being followed without even looking back, she had felt presence of her stalker the moment Giles' taxi had pulled away and the strange tingling continued as she made her way back to her hotel. She wasn't that worried, the vibrations she was picking up were definitely human

** some lonely chancer on the make** Buffy surmised as she slipped into a shop doorway and waited for the guy to lose interest.

In normal circumstances she would have just told the guy to get lost, but in a strange city Buffy cringed at the thought of making a scene.

Emerging from the doorway, Buffy thought for a second that she had lost him, but when he had the audacity to follow her into the alleyway Buffy decided that the game of cat and mouse was over. **The stalker was about to meet his match**

Angel felt a hard blow to his back; the force knocked him clean off his feet and flipped him over. He hit the ground with a dull thud as all the breath was knocked from his lungs.

**Well at least its dark and nobody saw my spectacular fall** Angel laughed finding himself lying flat on his back and feeling more than a little foolish. As he attempted to move he realised that he wasn't alone after all when a small but very strong foot pressed his chest back to the floor. Adjusting his eyes to the fading light, Angel found himself staring into the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen, beautiful but extremely angry eyes.

"Why are you following me?" the owner of the beautiful eyes demanded, the confidence in her strong voice informing him immediately that she could take care of herself

As he struggled to catch his breath, he watched as the amazing face in front of him changed from anger to what appeared to be disbelief.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you. I promise I won't hurt you" Angel tried to smile but he felt ridiculous saying such stupid words with the woman's foot pressing powerfully against his sternum.

Buffy removed the pressure and lifted her foot, her eyes never once leaving his face.

"This is going to sound like the oldest pick up line in the world but, have we met?" Angel found himself whispering sincerely, he could feel his heart pounding in his ears and his mouth suddenly became very dry.

**There was something about this woman that was so familiar and yet.**

Buffy stood trembling in shock, this wasn't real, this couldn't possibly be real.

**Have we met? ** The simple question felt as if somebody had put their hand inside her chest and ripped out her bleeding heart

She moved her lips to reply but found speech impossible, hell at that moment in time, she was having trouble just breathing in and out.

When she had dropped the so called stalker on his ass, the last thing she expected to be confronted with, were the eyes of her ex-lover blazing back at her.

She eventually clawed back a fragment of common sense and found enough movement to shake her head no.

Angel's eyes moved slightly, drinking in every detail he could find. He could honestly say that in all his years nobody had ever affected him this way.

Slowly holding out his hand he smiled

"My names Liam and you are" **besides being incredibly beautiful**

Buffy looked at the hand and found that her limbs were paralysed

**And you are?… you are?… you are? **

"Angel?" the word was spoken before her head had a chance to finish screaming it's warning to run.

Five years of loneliness, five long bitter years of denying herself even the luxury of thinking about this man suddenly got the better of her as her body reacted to his pull even against against her will.

"Angel, pretty name" Angel replied mistakenly taking the question as an Answer.

** Pretty name** Secretly his heart was singing, it wasn't just a pretty name, it fitted her perfectly. Up this close, the golden beauty standing in front of him would have put most of God's heavenly angels to shame

Somewhere in the back of her sanity, Buffy knew that the logical part of brain had closed down. If it hadn't she would have run, for the sake of both their lives, the second her eyes recognised the man at her feet. But, at that moment, rational thinking was impossible as she slowly accepted the hand on offer. When Buffy felt the texture of his rough skin she almost gasped aloud at the warmth beneath her fingers

Angel slowly rose from the ground, still holding onto her tiny fingers, he had never touched anything so soft in all of his life.

A large playful grin crossed his devastatingly handsome face.

"You’re a tiny little thing but you're very spry" he teased as he rubbed his neck with his free hand. Buffy's eyes widened in horror. It was as if she had slipped through a hole in the fabric of time and had found herself back in Sunnydale all those years ago, only this time Angel wasn't a vampire.

**He was alive, warm flesh and blood and she found herself wanting him with every particle of her being**

A million different questions spun around her head as her eyes devoured every inch of him, **How could the fates have been so careless or so cruel? **

Buffy was positive that he hadn't recognised her and yet that look in his eyes, the way he touched her fingers.

It was impossible to know who moved first, it was almost animalistic as the two souls touched in the dark. As Buffy's mouth opened to Angel's tongue he groaned and pushed her small body hard against the alley wall. Every instinct in Buffy knew that what they were doing was wrong, but as Angel's hands found her skin she felt alive for the first time in almost forever.

Her body responded to the call of her mate and it rejoiced at the reunion.

"Angel, oh dear God, Angel" she moaned as his lips moved from her bruised mouth down to her neck. Buffy gripped his thick hair between her fingers and arched her body up against his mouth. She was lost and at that moment she never wanted to be found.

"You taste so good" Angel moaned as he slipped his hands down her back and pulled her body closer into his.

"Who are you? " his mouth once again returned to her lips in a frantic attempt to get closer. No matter how hard he kissed her it wasn't enough, he wanted more, he desperately needed more.

Angel had long stopped questioning what was happening between the two of them as his body responded to every movement she made. She filled his arms and his lonely heart like nothing on earth had every touched him before.

Buffy drank from his mouth like a woman dying of thirst; she swallowed his moans with a satisfied pride that her body still had the ability to enchant him.

** Who are you? **

The words broke through the mists of passion like a bucket of ice water, washing the dream world she'd happily created away and dropping reality on her head with its entire wrath.

Buffy pushed with all her might in an attempt to get escape.

"No, no, no, no"

Angel didn't understand what was happening, he looked surprised and than hurt as Buffy backed further away.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry please don't…" he reached out a hand begging her not to leave him. Angel couldn't bear the thought of her leaving his world so soon after finding her.

**Who ever she was**

"This is wrong, I can't do this again." Buffy watched the confusion grow in his beautiful dark eyes. She was dying, a slow agonising death was creeping over her soul as every part of her being begged her to stay, it screamed at her that this was her only chance to find love again.

**He doesn't know I'm the Slayer, we could be happy this time.** her empty arms ached with the need to hold him again

**And how long would that last? ** The bitter voice of reason asked just as her resolve started to crumble.

Angel took a step forward; he was completely disgusted with himself.

**What in God's name had possessed him to act like that with a total stranger?** he asked as he watched the fear rise in the woman's eyes.

**But she was kissing you back** came the defence. It was true; she had kissed him back as if he meant something. Angel found himself desperately wanting to mean something to the beautiful blonde woman, for some insane reason he found himself wanting to mean everything to her. He knew it was madness, love at first sight was something you only found in cheap romantic novels.

**Liam Price didn't believe in such nonsense**

But as crazy as that thought sounded, that was just what he felt, just looking into her large troubled eyes Angel knew he could love this woman for the rest of his life without question.

By now Buffy was totally freaking out, all she could think about was putting as much distance between them as possible, turning on her heel she ran as fast as her trembling legs would carry her.

"WAIT!" Angel shouted as a flash of golden hair flew passed his face and disappeared into the dark, he turned and ran after her as fast as humanly possible but on reaching the end of the alley the angelic beauty that had touched his heart had faded into the night. Angel bent over with his hands resting on his knees panting for breath. As his eyes frantically searched the faceless crowd the words of the gypsy girl sung loudly in his ears.

**Her world is empty without you**

**There is something missing from both your worlds**

**Believe in your heart even when your head refuses to accept the inconceivable**

With one last pant he closed his eyes as a new voice called out to him, an inner voice that sounded very much like his own.

**BUFFY**

Go to Part 5