Part 15

"After spending all of your husband's money, I really think we deserve a rest."

Darla threw back her head and laughed as they descended the escalator at the mall. As she giggled her long blonde hair bobbed perfectly around her slim shoulders and her shapely figure attracted lustful glances from every passing male within a twenty-foot radius.

Darla knew she looked good. After spending countless years, and thousands of dollars, to get the right look, she knew she wore it well. For Darla, attracting men had never been a problem; they flocked around her like moths to an open flame.

All but one.

Only one man had ever rejected her advances and that, of course, had to be the only man on earth she had ever really wanted. But it hadn't stopped her. Rejection had never been a problem before and as Darla stepped off the escalator and caught sight of her and Buffy's reflections in the large store window to her left, she knew without a doubt that it wouldn't be a problem now. Buffy's pale face and skinny body looked almost childish next to her stunning appearance. The fact that she had already tricked the bitch out of Liam's life once only added to her twisted confidence.

"Come on, I know this great pasta house. You'll love it." Without another word, Darla placed her small shoe back on solid ground, turned to the right and, swinging her hips, swiftly moved away.

Lost for words, Buffy stared at her silently for a few seconds and watched in wonder as her so called *friend* slinked almost catlike across the floor of the mall. Struggling to keep up, she rolled her eyes and let out a deep sigh of relief that the shopping nightmare was finally coming to an end.

By now both her small hands were filled with carrier bags and Darla's poor joke about spending all of Liam's money wasn't that far from the truth. She had tried purchasing just the basics but even doing that had left a large dent in her husband's credit card.

That was the trouble with owning nothing but the clothing she stood up in.

As much as Buffy hated shopping with Darla she knew it as an evil necessity. Until her fragile memory returned, she had no choice but to rely on the generosity of others. She hated feeling so useless and made a strong mental point to memorise every shop she was likely to need in the future.

But not everything she saw was unknown.

Shops that were vaguely familiar caused little sparks to flare in her memory but the flashes were blurred and fleeting. Family days out at the mall, with her mom and Dawn, occasionally rose up from the darkness of her shattered past and taunted her with half promises of remembering. For a few tantalising seconds they danced close to the surface of her memory but, as Buffy fought through the confusion to join the pieces of the puzzle together, they quickly faded from her reach.

As Buffy watched Darla move further away from her, she reflected on the short amount of time they had spent together and as much as she hated to admit it, she still knew absolutely nothing about this woman at all. Although the shopping trip had proved a success, Buffy was increasingly frustrated that she hadn't learned more about her past.

Darla had been quiet for most of the afternoon. Apart from the odd comment about a certain style of dress or the colour of a pair of leather pants, Darla had been content to just study Buffy from a safe distance and watch for any signs that her amnesia claim was nothing but a annoying sham.

Darla Penn was convinced that Buffy's memory loss was all part of an elaborate trick to worm her way back into Liam's affections, but she had no intention of ever allowing that happen again.

From the moment Liam had told her about the accident and the convenient amnesia that had followed, Darla had been filled with doubts about its authenticity. Darla was convinced she would see through it in a heartbeat, she had know Buffy nearly all of their lives and there was no way on earth her rival would be able to pretend forever.

But back at the gallery, when Darla had first stared into her troubled eyes, the confident, strong, woman Buffy Summers had always portrayed now seemed lost behind a dark wall of confusion. She didn't seem to be pretending at all and it frustrated Darla all afternoon that she couldn't find a way to break through the masquerade and expose her rival as a fraud.

But she wasn't about to give up.

With a smile planted firmly on her face, she watched and waited patiently for the girl she hated with a vengeance to trip up and show herself for the liar Darla believed she was.

But it didn't happen. Darla's cunning eyes followed Buffy's every move but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't catch Buffy out with a single lie

By the end of the afternoon she had no choice but to accept that the little ex-cheerleader was indeed telling the truth. It was a set back and a bitter pill to swallow, but if the amnesia was true and she really had lost all of her past memory, there was always plan B. **William**

As the two women worked their way out of the shopping area and on to the main street, Buffy sighed deeply and wished with all her heart that she had stayed in bed that morning.

**Stayed in bed with Liam**

The unexpected thought of her husband brought a smile to her lips for the first time that afternoon. But, just as the warm feeling washed over her heart, a cold dread replaced it with the memory of Will Pennington's devastating revaluation.

**Was he really her lover?**

**No no no no no no no no**

Buffy fought to shut out of the handsome young man's face but no matter how hard she tried, the word *guilty* wouldn't release its sharp claws from her soul.

"If it's all the same to you I'd much rather go home and put my feet up for a few hours" She tried to refuse the offer of a meal but she was quickly dismissed.

Darla spun around.

"Oh no, that won't do at all" Her bright blue eyes sparkled and although Buffy was looking straight at her, she failed miserably to read the statement the other woman wore so carefully over her gaze.

Darla Penn, like Liam, was a master at hiding her feelings and as the day wore on Buffy was beginning to feel more and more uncomfortable in her presence. The thought that they had once been close, even best friends was becoming more alien with every passing minute. There was simply nothing about this strange young woman that Buffy could relate too.

It had nothing to do with her lack of memory, Buffy's female intuition told her that Darla Penn was simply too good to be true.

"Honey, I've been dying to talk to you properly ever since Liam told me you were home. Come on, I insist we at least grab a cup of coffee, it's my treat" Darla steered Buffy through the door of the most expensive restaurant in Sunnydale and made a large fuss about getting the best table in the house.

After leaving her breakfast all over the gallery floor, the last thing Buffy wanted at that moment in time was food. Darla, on the other hand, had no intention of taking no for an answer and at the determined look on her face, Buffy felt too tired to put up any real form of resistance.

**Liam, where the hell are you when I need you?** For the second time that day, Buffy found herself asking that question.

Needing a few minutes alone to collect her thoughts, she escaped to the ladies restroom, but when she finally returned to the table, Buffy found to her horror that Darla had not only ordered coffee she had also ordered the house special for both of them.

"There you are, Buffy. I thought for a moment you had *forgotten* where we were sitting" Looking up from the table, Darla teased and grinned a row of perfect white teeth.

For some unknown reason Buffy suddenly understood how a fly would feel caught in a spider's web.

She was trapped into spending more time with a person she really didn't like very much and in such a small environment, the walls felt as if they were slowly closing in. Looking toward the exit Buffy surrendered gracefully, knowing that there was simply no way of getting out without making a real fool of herself.

"I just left a message for Liam. I told him not to worry about you, we were still catching up. I don't know about you Buffy, but after spending all that money I'm suddenly ravenous" Darla laughed again and her smile grew even larger.

**Come into my parlour said the spider to the fly**

**Stop it**

**Don't trust her**

**STOP IT! **

While the voices deep inside her head battled with each other, Buffy cringed and realised that a long tiring day was just about to get a hell of a lot longer... and a whole lot more tiring.

Slowly, she pulled out the wooden chair opposite her companion and reluctantly sat down.

"Now you can ask me all those questions I know you're just dying to ask" Darla picked up a bottle of house wine and, ignoring Buffy's refusal, she filled the two tall glasses on the table with the clear cool liquid.

"I was hoping you could fill in a few of the blanks" Buffy asked and totally ignored the glass of white wine the other woman placed in front of her.

"Sure honey" Darla purred softly, and raising her own glass to her lips, she sipped gratefully at her drink. " After all, that's what best friends are for. But let's eat first and then you can ask what ever you want to know"

"Eat? But I'm really not..."Buffy started to refuse again but was quickly interrupted.

"Sorry, I've already ordered for you. I wasn't sure if your tastes were still the same so I just took a chance" Darla explained as their food arrived.

With a frown Buffy looked up and on seeing the overflowing plates of food being brought to their table, she felt her stomach strongly protest.

"I'm sorry Darla but I'm really not hungry."

Buffy bit back the wave of nausea she felt bubble in her throat and raised her hand to stop the waitress lowering the plate of pasta and salad in front of her.

Confused by Buffy's unusual reaction, the young waitress hesitated for a moment unsure of what to do next. She hadn't been working at the restaurant very long and this was the first time a meal had been sent back before the customer had even seen it.

"Would you like something else?" She asked as she hovered with the food but Buffy firmly shook her head.

"Just a glass of water, please"

Seeing the waitress start to turn away, Darla motioned for her to lower the plate anyway.

"Just leave it" She snapped and then realising her perfect image had slipped, she tilted her head towards the young girl and smiled sweetly

"Thank you, dear"

As the food was once again placed in front of her, Buffy felt her stomach turn over for the fourth time in as many minutes. She found herself wishing with all her heart that she could just get up from the table and run as far away from this overpowering woman as she possibly could.

"Please, I really..." She raised her hand again but her refusal was quickly brushed aside.

"It doesn't matter if you're not hungry, Buffy, you look anorexic."

Lowering her glass, Darla raised her hand and pointed her finger across the table.

" Look! I really didn't want to have to say this but you look dreadful, honey. I can see the bones in your throat sticking right through your skin."

Much to Buffy's embarrassment, Darla's voice seemed to carry across the whole restaurant. For a few seconds the noise level dropped considerably and heads at nearly every table turned in their direction. Buffy felt as if a dozen pairs of eyes were suddenly scrutinising her less than perfect appearance.

Unconsciously, she raised her hand to her throat and although she hated to admit that the damn woman was right, the small bones in question were easily felt beneath her fingertips. Before she had a chance to defend herself, Darla's loud voice was booming across the table once again.

"Whether you want the food or not, you need to eat. I promised Liam that I'd look after you and I never beak a promise" At that point Darla turned on her most concerned smile and almost sounded sincere.

With a tiny apologetic grin, the young waitress finally placed the plate of hot pasta back in front of the anorexic looking woman and silently slipped away.

With a sigh of defeat Buffy stared down at the food on her plate and while she really couldn't face eating anything, she didn't want to argue either.

Lifting up a fork she proceeded to move a small amount of the food around her plate and hoped that Darla was too busy with her own meal to realise what she was doing.

"Liam told me we've known each other for a long time"

The first question came easily. Now they were sitting only a few feet apart Buffy knew Darla could no longer avoid giving her the answers she so desperately needed to know.

Darla laughed as she split open a bread roll and lifted the butter knife.

"You could say that... We were five and you stole my boyfriend"

Buffy lifted a skeptical brow.

"I thought you broke my Barbie doll and I beat the crap out of you in the school yard" The spontaneous reply brought an unexpected glow of warmth and Buffy couldn't resist a tiny smile. Just knocking that smug look from the other woman's face felt surprisingly good.

"You remembered that?"

Darla raised her eyes suspiciously and studied Buffy's face for fresh signs of deceit.

Leaning forward she demanded an answer of her own.

" You're not faking this, are you?" Her blue eyes flashed a quizzical look.

Suddenly fresh hope sprung up that Buffy was playing a scam after all, but when Darla looked deeply into the hazel orbs directly opposite her she knew with a pang of disappointment that they only shone back with the truth.

Buffy took serious offence at the accusation.

"No, I'm not faking it, and I'm not playing games. Dammit, Why does every one keep asking me that." She snapped. Buffy was sick to death of that question. First Liam had been suspicious and then William and now Darla.

The question was not only an insult it was extremely cruel.

"Why the hell would anybody want to fake amnesia? " Buffy demanded angrily. Her eyes flashed and she only cooled her temper when she realised that her voice had risen and the occupants of both surrounding tables had stopped eating again and were now looking across with renewed curiosity.

Leaning back in her seat, Darla dropped the suspicion she was showing and replaced her statement with laughter.

"Honey, calm down, I believe you. You're right. Why would anybody want to fake amnesia?" In the blink of an eye Darla's* I really am your best friend* voice was firmly back in place.

The last thing she wanted was for Buffy not to trust her. Everything she had planned rested with the foolish girl believing and trusting her completely. Just as she had done the last time their paths had crossed. On that small thought Darla knew the amnesia story had to be on the level. There was no way Buffy could have faked not remembering that little encounter.

That time everything had ran so smoothly Darla could hardly believe her luck. It had played out just as she had planned. By the end of the evening she had tricked Buffy into believing her marriage was over and the stupid girl had fled into the night never to been seen again. It was perfect. Or it would have been if she had just stayed lost.

**Bloody accident** Darla silently cursed the event that had brought Buffy home.

Although she was now ninety-nine percent convinced that the amnesia was true, Darla still needed to delve a little deeper.

" So, how much do you remember?"

Buffy sighed, letting out a long, deep breath.

"When I first woke up after the accident, my mind was almost a blank. I could remember a few ordinary, everyday things but almost nothing about my personal life." The frustration she felt returned to her voice as Buffy recalled the first few hours after waking in hospital.

It had been such a difficult time. When asked she had recited the name of the president with ease but for the life of her she hadn't been able to remember her own name.

"Liam said you hit your head?" Still needing her own answers, Darla continued to prod.

Buffy chewed down on her lower lip and considered the question.

"That's what the doctor told me. I guess it must be true because I've still got the lump to prove it." She raised her hand slightly and let her fingertips slide across the slight swelling that was still on the side of her head. After a week it was much smaller now but there was still enough of a bump left to prove the accident hadn't been a complete figment of her imagination.

As her fingertips touched a nerve, Buffy winced slightly in pain and for the first time since coming face to face, Darla felt a small jolt of pity.

"The crash must have been pretty horrific"

She didn't really need to ask; Darla already knew the answer. The New York coach crash had been so dreadful that footage of the accident was even covered on the Sunnydale evening news. The irony was, Darla remembered watching the pictures on her TV screen without even knowing that the girl she had tried to destroy a few months earlier was now amongst the victims.

Not that it really mattered. If Buffy Angelus had died that day all of Darla's problems would have died along with her.

Buffy's death meant only one thing. Liam would be free. Free for her.

If Buffy could have read her thoughts she would have been horrified to learn just how much this woman, who pretended to be her friend, really hated her. Sadly mind reading wasn't one of her talents and in her state of ignorance, Buffy let her guard down and the two women started chatting like they really could have once been friends.

Without noticing it, Buffy's anger slipped away.

"At first I was terrified that I'd never recover any of my past, but the last few days have brought back a few memories. Feelings more than anything else but there was also a few family faces." Buffy smile sadly as she remembered her mother and Dawnie's happy faces grinning across the breakfast table each morning. When she started talking again her voice was much softer, almost distant.

"The hardest thing is not knowing who I am, or who I was. It feels like I have this huge shadow hanging over me and it's suffocating me with frustration." Buffy opened her heart and revealed the true extent of her pain.

That was just how she felt. There were so many blank pages of her lost life she needed to fill in before she could even hope to reclaim her past. Until that past was returned, the shadow of not knowing would remain, and haunt her every waking moment.

As she continued to push the food around her plate with the back of her fork, Darla reached out across the table and unexpectedly gripped her hand.

"That must be so creepy" she sympathised with all the skill of an award winning actress.

At the act of concern Buffy started to forget her earlier fears that this woman could not be trusted and felt her body relax. She was so in need of somebody to talk to that common sense was pushed to one side.

"It is, it's like I'm living in limbo. All my dreams for the future have disappeared into a deep black hole "

Darla didn't have time to smirk, because Buffy's next words sent a bolt of cold fear straight to her heart.

"But luckily Liam's been wonderful"

As Buffy proceeded to explain everything that had happened since returning to Sunnydale, Darla fought with all her might to keep her seething face expressionless.

Outside her body language portrayed the very vision of concern but inside, Darla was frantic to destroy the new-found feelings Buffy was confessing she had discovered.

"But what about poor William, I bet he didn't take being forgotten too well."

"William?" Buffy choked slightly as the pasta she had attempted to swallow got stuck in her throat.

"Why would William be upset?" She asked, nervously hoping the question sounded innocent.

Inside her chest, her heart was beating so fast Buffy swore the word *guilty* shone brightly in her terrified eyes.

Raising her glass of wine once again to her lips, Darla stopped and repeated Buffy's question.

"Why?" She laughed.

"Because the guy's madly in love with you. He has been for nearly two years"

Buffy felt sick. She had hoped with all her heart that William had been lying, but suddenly with Darla mentioning his name, the forgotten affair started to feel terrifyingly real again.

For reasons she wasn't quite sure of Buffy wasn't about to admit anything.

"Who told you that?"

Darla rolled her eyes.

"Duh! Buffy, William Pennington's my brother. He tells me *everything*" When she look up, her cool blue eyes were now positively twinkling with mischief.

"Penn. P.Pennington?" Buffy stuttered as the name fell into place.

" Half brother actually. Same father. William lived in England until two years ago, which is why he speaks with that silly accent. But he's my darling brother alright. He changed his name slightly because he thinks in his line of work it sounds more romantic." Darla laughed and her smile grew as she noticed how uncomfortable Buffy appeared.

"Brother" Buffy couldn't think straight as she ran her eyes over the small blonde woman facing her and took in the family resemblance.

It suddenly hit her like a bolt out of the blue.

The hair colour was slightly different but there was definitely something around the eyes.

Buffy went cold. The affair was no longer a dirty secret. She knew, William knew and now Darla.

Although the facts were staring her plainly in the face Buffy still wasn't about to confess. Especially to an affair she couldn't remember.

"What did he tell you about us?"

Darla laughed again.

"Please, do you really want me to go into all the sordid details while we're eating"

"Tell me" Buffy repeated as calmly as possible. She didn't care if Darla was eating, she needed to know the truth and she needed to know it now.

Darla placed her fork down on the table with a loud sigh.

"He told me you were lovers, you had been for awhile" She kept her face expressionless and prayed Buffy couldn't hear the rapid beating of her excited heart.

She needn't have worried; Buffy was too troubled to hear anything.

The tiny speck of hope she had held in her heart that the affair was all in William's mind was being completely blown apart.

"But did *I* ever tell you we were having an affair?" Buffy pleaded, still clinging to the belief that Will had been lying about their relationship. He might have boasted to his sister that they were lovers but unless she had told Darla herself, Buffy still refused to believe it.

"Not directly, but the two of you were hardly discreet"

"What are you saying?"

Darla rolled her eyes. She could see that Buffy was already falling for William's lies and it warmed her heart. She wanted to come right out and tell her every word her brother had told her was true but that was too easy. Darla wanted Buffy to suffer with the knowledge that she had cheated on her husband. She knew Buffy would never be able to hide that kind of secret and the pressure to tell Liam would rip them apart.

**But let her suffer for a while before that happens. Let her beat herself up with the fear of the affair becoming public**

"What are you saying?" Buffy repeated her question.

"I'm saying that William was at your gallery nearly every afternoon Buffy. I'm sure if you ask the staff they will confirm this?"

"But that doesn't mean.." Buffy started to protest but Darla cut her off with a wave of her hand.

"Oh sure. Do you expect me to believe you were only having tea and crackers when you locked yourselves in that little office for all hours" she smirked with satisfaction

At Buffy's pained look Darla knew she had hit the mark. Buffy was well and truly suckered.

**I've had you on that office floor more times than I can count **

Buffy looked down at the food on her plate. She didn't have any appetite to start with but now the smell of the food was making her sick again. Despite the warm day she felt cold. Forcing herself to look up Buffy asked the question that had burned in her mind from the second William had first dropped his bombshell.

"Do you think Liam knew?" Buffy shuddered at the idea. **Was that where the underlying anger she sensed in him came from**

"Liam?... To be honest Buffy, if he knew about you two he never said anything to me. Of course he might have covered it up after you left him. After all, Liam is a proud man"

**You left him once and now you're right back where you started**

"So I did leave him?" Buffy asked quietly, although William's earlier words had already confirmed that suspicion.

Her companion frowned for a second before carefully hiding the statement.

"He never told you?"

Buffy shook her head.

Darla chewed her lip; she hadn't been counting on that. She had expected Liam to throw that little detail right in her face.

"I really walked out on him?" Buffy found that piece of information the hardest to deal with. She hope against hope that the statement was wrong but when Darla finally nodded her head, the last fragment that a mistake had been made was lost.

Darla waited for a moment, giving Buffy just enough time to get used to the lie. From the ghostly colour of her face she knew it wouldn't be too long before Buffy's shattered life imploded

"What now? Will you leave him again?"

Buffy shrugged her small shoulders and her face crumbled into a mask of confusion. The only thoughts that danced in the dark corners of her mind were **Did she want to lose Liam again so soon after rediscovering him ** and **Would her life be better without him?**

Both questions brought more pain than she wanted to admit. At the hesitation Darla started to get nervous.

"Buffy?" She spoke just loud enough to break through the lost woman's reverie.

Buffy looked up and her eyes flickered.

"I don't know, I wish I did" She finally replied and even as the words left her mouth she started to feel her heart ache.

**Maybe she would be better off running away from all this madness and starting a new life. What did the past really matter, she could reinvent herself and start all over again. No ties, no problems.. No strong arms to hold you in the dark. No sweet lips to kiss away your tears.. No Liam.**

Without even trying, the questions answered themselves. Buffy didn't want a new life and she didn't want a forgotten lover. She wanted the man that made her heart race with just a single glance. She wanted the man she had fallen in lust with at first sight.. Twice, if she was being honest. From the moment she had opened her eyes in that hospital room, Liam Angelus was all she had been able to see.

Darla felt real panic now as she watched the play of emotions cover Buffy's face. She knew precisely what her rival was thinking, she was losing her battle to send the girl running and it scared her to death.

"Buffy, my brother loves you and inside your mind, underneath all that confusion, you feel the same way about him." She argued, vainly trying to recover some lost ground.

"But that's the trouble, I don't. I'm sorry but don't feel anything for your brother at all. I might have forgotten nearly all my life but my feelings are returning faster than my memories and one thing I'm very sure about, when William kissed me I felt nothing."

"And Liam..?" Darla struggled to keep the bitterness she felt from her voice but inside her veins, her blood was beginning to freeze.

The smile that flickered at the corner of Buffy's lips was all the conformation she needed to fear the worse.

"When Liam's around... it's like the lights dim everywhere else. I don't remember him yet but I already know I still love him." With the words came the relief.

**She loved him. There were no longer any doubts in her mind. She loved Liam. She wanted only Liam**

"But you left him. You couldn't have loved him if you ran away" Darla started to lose control as all her well thought out plans started to crumble around her. Buffy wasn't supposed to fall in love with Liam, she was supposed to run off with William leaving her to pick up the pieces of his broken heart all over again.

Of all the scenarios that had played out in her head, this was the last one she had considered.

After successfully destroying their marriage the last time, Darla had almost convinced the heartbroken man that Buffy was the worse mistake of his life. But just as Liam was beginning to respond to her, the accident had sent him running back to New York and weeks of turning him against Buffy had collapsed.

The smile that was growing on Buffy's face was starting to make her feel ill. Snatching up the wine bottle, Darla refilled her glass and swallowed the contents as if she was drinking water on a hot day.

In her ignorance, Buffy was still too caught up in her own new plans to notice the change in her companion.

As Darla finished her drink, the wine rushed straight to her head but it did little to help her mood. For her, the conversation was about to go from bad to worse.

"I was thinking, If Liam came all the way to New York to bring me home, then maybe he still loves me too. Darla, I want to make it up to him, whatever pain I caused him I want to make it right. If there's anyway to save my marriage I'm determined to find it." As she finished the rush of words Buffy sighed with relief. She now knew exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to make a life with Liam and she wanted to tell him how she felt as soon as possible.

Not sure of how to proceed Darla played the last card she could think of.

"And you really think that William is going to let you?" She asked sympathetically but inside she was seething with rage.

**William really did love the little bitch so it wouldn't be too hard convincing him to make as much trouble for Buffy and Liam as was possible**

With that thought, Darla started to feel a tiny ray of hope. If Buffy wouldn't leave her husband then maybe she and William would help Liam leave Buffy.

**Why would he want to stay with her when she was screwing another man?**

The ray of hope started to grow.

**As long as Buffy couldn't remember the truth she couldn't deny the affair.** Darla realised. Suddenly the amnesia she so wanted to be a lie was becoming her best ally. Liam was far too proud to stand by a cheating wife. **The ink on the divorce paper was almost dry and Buffy would never see it coming**

With the new plan taking shape Darla felt better but she wasn't home and dry yet.

"William seemed like a fair person. I hope he understands" Buffy spoke wishfully, hoping she had read William Pennington's character as well as she thought.

Darla looked across the table and reached out her hands to clasp Buffy's fingers.

" Don't worry about Will, Buffy. I'll talk to him and explain everything. I'm sure I can make him see things from our perspective" The happy woman was purring again as her confidence returned.

"Thanks, Darla. What would I do without you" Buffy replied and for the first time she felt as if a large weight had been removed from her small shoulders.

**If William really cared about her surely he would want her to be happy? **

Buffy suddenly felt very tired. It had been a long day and all she wanted to do was head for her home and try and put the mess that had over taken her life into some sort of order. She and Liam needed to have a long talk and maybe then they could decide where their future lay.

When their bill was settled, the two blonde women walked to the door of the restaurant. Before leaving Darla turned and smiled as she hugged Buffy close.

"Try not to worry, Buffy. Everything will work itself out for the best. Believe me" She whispered her reassurances with almost believable sincerity.

With the nod of her head, Buffy smiled her thanks again and pulled way.

"When you see William, please tell him that I'm sorry, but whatever we had is over. It has to be" Buffy turned and before Darla had a chance to reply she climbed into the back of a waiting cab and was gone.

As the taillights disappeared around the corner taking Buffy back to her husband, Darla started to laugh.

**When you see William, please tell him that I'm sorry, but whatever we had is over. It has to be**

**Yeah, right**

Standing in the doorway of the restaurant, the real hatred Darla was feeling broke free and flashed dangerously across her face.

" If you think for one second that I'm going to stand back and let you and *my* Liam live happily ever after, you couldn't be more wrong. I'm going to rip you two so far apart that you'll never become a problem again. That *my dear girl* is a real promise."

**And I never break a promise**

Part 16

To her surprise, the house was dark and empty when Buffy returned from her depressing encounter with Darla. Walking up to the front door with her arms filled with parcels, the peaceful stillness that greeted the exhausted girl caused a shudder of disappointment to slide the full length of her tired body.

After spending almost every second of the last two weeks in Liam's company, his unexpected absence felt strangely unsettling.

**Admit it, Summers. When he's not around you really miss him.**

The explanation made a lot of sense, but it didn't quite hit the mark. After the events of the last twenty-four hours, Buffy knew the feelings she had for Liam went a lot deeper than just missing him. She might not remember falling in love with the man the first time around but, this time, it was an entirely different story.

**When Liam's around... it's like the lights dim everywhere else. I don't remember him yet but I already know I still love him**

A warm smile started to spread across her face but before she had the chance to enjoy it, a new voice entered Buffy's head and the smile that had started so readily died on her lips.

**It's Will, Buffy. William Pennington...**

** When he breaks your heart again...I'll still be here and Buffy, I'll still love you**

Reaching in her purse, Buffy sighed as she struggled to find her keys.

After spending days looking for answers she realised, for the first time since the accident, that maybe somethings in life really were better left forgotten. If not handled carefully, the new knowledge she now possessed could possibly destroy any chance she might have of ever being happy with Liam again.

**You left him once and now you're right back where you started**

As she closed the door behind her with a deep sigh of regret, Buffy still couldn't remember being the person who had lived in this house just four months earlier.

** Buffy Angelus.**

**A liar? **

**A cheat?**

Buffy shook the unpleasant words from her head. From the feelings she was receiving from her heart, both thoughts seemed impossible to accept.

**Was she really the sort of woman who could run out on a husband who had obviously loved her and yet leave no explanation for her actions? **

**The sort of woman who took a lover after less than two years of marriage?**

The reply to her questions brought a small amount of comfort.

**You might have run out on a husband but you didn't run away with a lover**

Ever since William had dropped his little bombshell, no matter how hard she tried, one thought wouldn't leave her alone.

**If William loved her as much as he said he did, why hadn't he been with her in New York? Why was she travelling on that bus all on her own, three months after leaving Sunnydale?**

**Maybe because it's all Bullshit**

Deep in her heart Buffy knew there was something very wrong with the picture in front of her, but, try as she might, she couldn't put her finger on what part of the equation was troubling her the most.

**William's a liar? **

Buffy shook her head. It couldn't be William because Darla had backed up his story.

**Darla's a liar as well? **

Again Buffy shook the thought from her mind.

**Why would they both lie to her? What could they possibly gain that would make their deception worth all their trouble? **

In her right mind, the shattered young woman might have had some chance of seeing through the masquerade that was being cleverly played out in front of her. But with her past temporarily wiped out and her future uncertain, Buffy had no idea which direction the deceit was coming from.

Liam obviously trusted Darla and Darla, in turn, trusted her brother.

For the time being Buffy knew she had no choice but to trust all three of them... .. However, no matter what anyone told her, she still smelt a rat.

***

Walking through the empty rooms of her childhood home, Buffy felt the loneliness close in all around her. It was strange how the house only felt like a home when Liam was around.

Without his presence, the empty rooms just felt like any other bricks and mortar.

**If Liam finds out about William he'll be the one leaving this time**

Buffy stood at the kitchen sink and filled the kettle. She didn't really want a drink but she needed to do something, anything to take her mind off the events of the day. Those thoughts refused to stay silent.

**Maybe she could tell Liam the truth?**

**And lose him**

**Or she could hope that William left her in peace.**

**But then there was always the chance that if Liam found out later she would still lose him**

"Let's face it. I'm dammed if I tell him and I'm dammed if I don't"

With a heavy heart Buffy climbed the stairs to her bedroom.

*****

After the day she had just gone through, Buffy was so exhausted all she wanted to do was stand under a blistering hot shower for a few hours and then crawl into bed.

Walking into her bedroom, she dropped all of her shopping bags on the left side of her bed and, with a sigh of relief, kicked off her shoes and sat down. The softness, which Buffy sank into, felt so comfortable and welcoming that every weary bone in her body pleaded for her to just swing her legs over the side of the bed and disappear into the warmth of the covers.

As the long day and all its complications finally caught up with her, Buffy felt as if she could easily sleep for a week.

**But you need to talk to Liam and you need to do it tonight**

With a deep sigh of regret Buffy reluctantly struggled back up on her feet, she knew a scented bubble bath was out of the question, far too relaxing, but a shower would be all right. A long hot shower was possibly the only thing likely to chase away the slumber that had serious designs on her body.

Dropping the clothes she had worn that day in a tidy pile on her bed, Buffy walked naked to the bathroom and setting the water for blisteringly hot she stepped in to the shower and closed the door behind her.

Within seconds she was standing under a hot spray of steamy water, her taut muscles slowly starting to relax as the stinging needles hit every inch of her aching body. When a tidal wave of exhaustion crept up and rolled over her, Buffy leant forward and rested her two small hands flat against the shower wall for support.

As the steam started to fill the shower, Buffy closed her eyes and in trying to clear her head of all thoughts, she let the full force of the spray pound against her flesh washing away all the pain of the last twelve hours. The liquid therapy cascaded down over her bowed head and worked its magic on her shoulders, spine and buttocks before pooling at her feet and finally draining away.

For a few blissful seconds, Buffy felt as if she was flying high above the clouds without a care in the world. But bliss never lasts for long. When the water temperature changed, and cooled, reality returned and sent her crashing back to earth with a shiver.

Mourning the warmth leaving her skin, Buffy quickly shampooed her hair in the last of the tepid waters and stepped out of the shower before being blasted with an icy spray.

Feeling relaxed for the first time that day, she dried herself with a large, fluffy towel and returned to her bedroom feeling a lot brighter.

Dressed in just her bra and panties Buffy sat in front of her bedroom mirror and combed the tangles from her blonde hair. Whether it was the effects of the relaxing shower she wasn't sure, but the woman staring back at her looked a lot better than she had a few days earlier. She still looked very tired and far too thin for her liking but Buffy noticed, thankfully, that only a ghostly outline of her bruising remained and the thin pink line where her face had been stitched back together was quickly fading from sight.

A light touch of makeup was all it took to hide the last remaining evidence that she had ever been in an accident at all.

"Now, if only I could remove the scars on my mind that easily" Buffy sighed wishfully as she brushed just a hint of colour to her cheeks.

The sudden sound of movement downstairs caused her to turn her head and, when her name was called, Buffy jumped to her feet with a wide grin across her face.

**Liam**

In her excitement, Buffy was almost out of the bedroom door before she realised to her horror that she was still in her underwear.

*****

Angel was pouring himself a drink when his wife entered the room. He wouldn't have admitted it, but he had just spent the whole afternoon missing her, wondering how her shopping trip with Darla had gone.

Seeing his friend could hardly concentrate for more than a few seconds at a time, Lindsey had offered to stand in for him at their afternoon meeting, but when Darla left a message saying they were still catching up, Angel had disappointedly carried on with his work.

Arriving home, he had been more than a little surprised to discover Buffy was already home.

On hearing the water running in the shower above, it took all of Angel's restraint not to pull open the bathroom door and join her. He and Buffy had made love in that shower more times than he could count and the thought that they would never do it again brought a sharp sting of regret to his heart.

So lost in his memories of wet bodies and loud moaning, Angel almost missed when the object of his daydream started to speak.

"So. What do you think?" Buffy asked shyly and moved her hands over the soft material of her new dress.

Putting down his now empty glass, Angel looked over and smiled.

"Breath-taking" He replied, fighting to keep his tone level but it was a waste of effort. The sight before him made it impossible to speak calmly.

At the compliment Buffy smiled.

"Thank you. I wasn't sure about the colour at first" She replied quietly, as she continued to erase a non-existent crease from the dress.

Angel watched her for a moment, noting the tension that seemed to radiate from her body.

"I wasn't talking about the dress" He lifted his dark hungry eyes and the heated gaze that devoured her body caused Buffy to blush almost to the roots of her hair.

"R. Really? " She stuttered nervously and felt a rush of blood surge to her head.

"Yes. Really" Angel chuckled softly and without taking his eyes from her face he moved a silent step forward.

Buffy sighed, wanting desperately to believe in his words, but knowing they couldn't be true. Admittedly she looked better than she had a few days earlier, but she was a shell of the woman she used to be.

"You're sweet. A terrible liar, but sweet" Her voice started with a small smile but Darla's cruel words were never more than a breath away.

**Look! I really didn't want to have to say this but you look dreadful, honey. I can see the bones in your throat sticking right through your skin. **

At the painful memory, Buffy's confidence started to tumble.

" I know I'm only a shadow of the girl you married, I've seen the wedding video, remember" The smile that kissed the corners of her mouth was already fading.

At the pain he heard in her voice, Angel shook his head.

"You're wrong, Buffy. You're exactly the girl I married" He replied truthfully.

" But I look..."

**You look dreadful**

Darla's voice continued its torment.

Buffy swallowed the lump of self-pity that had risen in her throat and her fingers ran lightly across her collarbone. But, before she had a chance to blink Angel was in front of her, covering her small hand with his and lowering it away from her throat.

"That's not important... Not to me, Buffy... Look "

Without another word he picked up her trembling hand and brought it to rest lightly over his chest.

Buffy hesitated for a moment, unsure of his meaning, but just as she was about to ask him to explain, she felt the rapid beat of Liam's heart pounding beneath her fingertips.

Raising her head, their eyes met in understanding.

"You do that to me every time you walk into a room." He licked his lips nervously, before continuing.

" You have from the very first moment you marched into my office at Wolfram and Hart and threatened to kick my ass if I even tried to take Dawn away from you." Angel smiled softly into her eyes as he related the memory of their first meeting.

She had been so angry that day, full of fire and spirit and when Angel had finally caught his breath after her attack, he knew in a heartbeat that she was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.

"You constantly take my breath away, Buffy" He admitted truthfully and knew he was leaving himself wide open.

Buffy looked doubtful for a moment, as if the words were so unbelievable they couldn't possibly be real. Women like Darla took men's breath away, not skinny little things like her. But from the look on his face, her husband was strongly disagreeing with her.

"You're the only woman who has ever done that to me" Angel's hands slipped over her shoulders, his heart aching as he saw the need for reassurance in her troubled eyes.

"I really do that?" Buffy asked in amazement. She took a deep breath, which made her breasts swell up against the soft material of her new dress.

Angel nodded his head and almost groaned out loud.

Deciding that actions would be better than words, he slowly drew her closer until their bodies were locked together, her small breasts pushing against the hard wall of his chest, and her hips pressing against him so tightly that there was no mistaking how much he wanted her.

Buffy gasped, but made no attempt to move, as her breath caught deep in her throat. It seemed to her that the breathlessness now worked both ways.

As he watched her come to terms with the revelation, Angel knew at that moment that they were both incredibly vulnerable, but he didn't care. He wanted her so much, he ached in places he had almost forgotten existed these last four months.

When he looked up, the unexpected passion in Buffy's shining hazel eyes sent a shiver right down his spine.

Their bodies were pressing so closely together that Angel could feel the heat radiating from her skin.

"I missed you so much" His voice was husky and raw, ringing with a conviction that tore at her soul.

Tilting his head slightly, Angel's dark gaze bore directly into Buffy's eyes and waited for her response. He didn't need to wait long.

Touching the side of his face tenderly, she smiled and looked into his chocolate eyes, now dark with passion. When Buffy finally spoke, the word came not from her lost memory, but straight from her heart

"Angel"

The name was less than a sigh, it was almost a silent caress that brushed softly over his skin and soaked deep into his lonely soul.

Angel wasn't sure who moved first, but suddenly their lips were touching, melting together so urgently that the spark they created almost set his blood on fire. With a gasp, Buffy reached up and slipped her arms tightly around his neck.

**How on earth could I have forgotten this** Every particle of her being cried out as her body ached for his touch.

Closing his own eyes and deepening their kiss, Angel moaned as his tongue slipped into her warm mouth and a million memories of kissing Buffy swam painfully around his head.

**Kissing her, holding her, making love to her...**

Every memory they had ever shared. Only they didn't share them any more. The memories were now only his.

**She's kissing you but she still doesn't really know you**

"I can't do this" Panting for breath, Angel reluctantly broke the kiss and gently pushed away. As he stood back his heartbeat thundered so loud in his ears that he thought it was in serious danger of exploding

Immediately missing the intimacy of his body pressing against hers, Buffy looked up with confusion.

"Liam?"

When Angel stepped back even further her large troubled eyes filled with pain and rejection.

"Did I do something wrong?" Buffy whispered again as a small frown marred her beautiful face.

Squeezing his eyes shut for a moment to cut out the pain he saw, Angel shook his head.

"No" His voice was barely a whisper. " I shouldn't be taking advantage of you, not while you still can't remember"

"You don't want me?" Buffy hated the tremor that appeared in her voice as she spoke, but no matter how hard she tried, she simply couldn't prevent it.

**She had been ready to give herself to Liam, heart, body and soul but he had simply rejected her**

"Not want you?" Angel laughed, but the sound that fell from his lips held no amusement. The cool chuckle rattled through the room with deep felt bitterness.

"Buffy I want you so much I'm physically in pain." Angel replied, running his hand through his hair with sheer frustration. He watched as Buffy struggled to accept his words and knew that she was finding the situation even harder to understand then he was.

Taking a deep breath, he continued in a much softer tone.

" Buffy, me wanting you was never the problem.... I always wanted you"

"But I don't understand?"

Angel sighed and held out his hand.

"Then maybe it's time I told you the truth."

Slowly, he led her towards his study and on reaching his desk, Angel pulled open the top drawer.

Buffy felt her heart lurch in sudden panic. The look on Liam's face was the same unreadable mask he had worn at the hospital. For a second she swore she caught a fleeting look of anger but, as quickly as it had appeared, it was hidden

Standing in silence she watched and waited as the contents of a long envelope were then poured onto the table.

Two rings and a folded sheet of paper.

Go to Part Seventeen