Rating: umm...I'm thinking along the lines of PG...in the meantime. Who knows what the future might bring:).
Disclaimer: nope, last time I checked, nothing was mine.
Spoilers: well...better safe than sorry: everything up to the end of season 3 can be spoilery.
Synopsis: I have a strange drive to rewrite season 3 of BtVS. I just don't seem to like the way it ended...beats me why. Anyway, so despite the fact that the original plan was to begin with "Helpless" (that's around the time everything really started getting screwed up B/A-wise), as you can see, plan's changed and I'm going to start with "Anne". If you expect to find in this series events/quotes from the original season....I seriously mean it - I'll try my hardest keeping them to the very minimum. But all in all - it's probably a yet another attempt to end the season on a more "positive" B/A level. See how it goes:).
Pairing: the conventional ships: B/A, W/O, C/X. If I decide to torture any/all of them, you'll be the first to know:).
Distribution: ask first.
Feedback: please, yes, please.
I want to hold air in my hand
Own the one thing you can't buy
Nothing to win, nothing to lose
It's time to be what I need to be
I'm gonna run from everything
Everything that holds me down
Nothing to win, nothing to lose
It's time to be what I need to be
- Vast, "Free"
******
"Hey," Buffy whispered, the moment Angel opened his eyes.
He blinked at her a few times, and sat up, without saying a word. Either he still was disoriented from being woken up less than an hour after he had fallen asleep, or he really didn't know what was going on.
She beamed at his rather tired and lost expression. "Sorry I woke you up," she apologized, inwardly knowing she hadn't had to, but wanted to, and the little half-smile he flashed her in response, told her he knew that, too. "I had a strange urge to drop in before school," she excused. "How are you?"
"Fine," he replied.
"Good," she nodded hesitantly. "I-umm…I brought you," her hand fished for the package she had left by the bed next to her school bag, and she replaced it to the nightstand next to Angel. After putting it down, she pulled back, folding her hands in her lap and looking down on them. "I stopped by the butcher's on my way over, I…I thought I'd get you some…" she flashed Angel a look, and the very moment, he sharply turned his gaze from the container back to her. "I don't know what you've been doing with the ones I've been bringing you so far, but…I hope you've been…feeding, and…"
"Thank you," he whispered.
The Slayer smiled. "You're welcome." She took his hand in hers, smoothing the back of his palm with her other hand. "I guess I better go now."
Angel's eyes snapped up from his hand to meet hers. "Now?"
"Yeah," she sighed, not making a move to leave. "School…remember?"
"School," Angel echoed, with a somewhat sad note to his voice, then he swallowed hard and looked at her. "Will you…come…tonight?"
The blonde grinned. "You know I will," she assured him, "straight after school, I promise." She opened her mouth to say something else, but only exhaled, looking down from him.
Angel silently waited for her to go on.
"It's just that...I just remembered…Giles wanted me to…well, do my job, actually, which I recently…haven't been doing," she gazed back at him. "He wants me and Faith to do an extensive patrol tonight, don't really know why. He's got a 'feeling'," she rolled her eyes, sighing. "Or maybe it's just me, forgetting who I'm supposed to be," she murmured, then smiled at him again, "but I *will* be here. As soon as I can."
The vampire nodded, averting his eyes for a moment. "Can I…come?" he inquired, hopefully holding her gaze.
Buffy frowned. "Patrolling? I don't think it's such a good idea…"
"I'm better now," Angel assured her with his gaze.
"Not better enough to fight!" she argued, shaking her head emphatically.
"I-I…won't be i-in your way," he promised.
"No, but you'll be in *their* way," the Slayer still held to her own. "Angel, you can get hurt."
"I won't," he told her softly, looking her deep in the eyes. "Please."
Buffy sighed, knowing she wouldn't be a worthy debater, arguing with him. They were the perfect match whenever it came to that, they could go on forever, utterly convinced the other's wrong. And there also was the little problem, that she actually *wanted* him to go, even knowing it wouldn't be the best thing for him at the moment. She knew Giles' patience wouldn't last forever, understandably, and it was only a matter of time, until her duty would take over her life again, and she wouldn't be able to spend as much time with him anymore. "I'll think about it," she promised. "If I decide to let you come, I'll jump in before patrol and take you with me. Deal?"
Angel nodded, his eyes flashing with a smile, then he reached out his hand and gently cupped her cheek, inclining her closer, until their lips met in a mild kiss.
******
"He kissed you?!" Willow still couldn't believe, just as though it was that out of the ordinary.
"Yeah," Buffy grinned sheepishly, biting her lip.
"Angel kissed you!" the redhead exclaimed. "He kissed you…he kissed you?" she asked the rhetorical question again.
The Slayer nodded, not at all appearing to be annoyed by her best friend, even though the question had already been brought up at least ten times in the last couple of minutes.
"He just grabbed you, out of the blue, and…kissed you?" Willow asked, again.
"He didn't *grab* me," the blonde corrected, smiling coyly.
"Angel never grabbed you?" the witch quirked a brow pointedly.
Buffy punched her arm playfully, then just smiled. "He just…he reached out for me, and…and then he drew closer, and," she sighed, her eyes flashing with longing, "and he kissed me. He just kissed me, the way…the way Angel does," she beamed, inwardly realizing that she hadn't exactly cleared it up for her friend.
The redhead grinned. "And?" she grilled eagerly, inclining closer to the Slayer who was siting cross the table. "Then, what happened?"
Buffy's beam vanished at once. She licked her lips, shrugging. "And…it was over."
"Over?" Willow responded with a confused look. "What do you mean?"
The Slayer sighed. "He kissed me, and it was…it was so…'Angel'," the beam from before crept back to the corners of her mouth, just for a moment. "It was incredible, I…I felt like I was flying. And then he pulled back," the smile evanesced again, being replaced with perplexity. "He pulled back from me, muttering he was sorry. He wasn't even able to look at me," she gazed up at her best friend, her eyes practically pleading with the witch to tell her it hadn't happened that way.
But how could she? "I'm sorry," Willow whispered.
"Why did he do that?" her apology had clearly entered through Buffy's one ear and instantly flew out of the other, assuming it had entered at all. "It wasn't even *that* much of a kiss, it wasn't such a big deal…well, it was," she flashed Willow another grin, "but not *that* big a deal to…to take it all back," she pouted like a little girl.
"And what did you do?" Willow probed gently.
"Bailed," Buffy smirked, shrugging in defeat. "It just…it got so awkward, for both of us. So I pretty much did the two of us a favor when I simply grabbed my bag and took off. I don't know," she groaned, sharply turning her head at the redhead. "Willow, what if I should have stayed?" she suddenly asked, as if in realization. "What if I ruined it? What if…what if it's all my fault?"
The redhead touched her arm encouragingly. "Don't eat yourself up over this, it wasn't your fault, it was nobody's fault." She grinned knowingly. "He'll come around. Maybe he was just scared?"
"You think?" the blonde inquired hopefully.
"Well, it…it makes a lot of sense…once you think about it," Willow tried her best, not breaking eye contact with the Slayer, needing to know it was of any comfort to her, because she herself sure didn't know which straw to grasp at anymore. No one could ever explain Angel's behavior, except for himself, and on some occasions - Buffy. It, obviously, wasn't one of these occasions.
"And what's even worse, he wants to patrol with me tonight," Buffy informed her. "Now, how am I supposed to do that? How am I supposed to see him...after this?" her voice almost demanded her friend to supply an answer.
"He does? Why?" the witch frowned.
"Because Giles got the Watcher-bug, and he wants Faith and me 'out-in-the-field', cuz the world's gonna end tomorrow," the blonde groaned.
"I see," Willow nodded, then a realization struck her and she frowned. "Didn't it happen already?"
"And chances are will again, but something tells me it's not the case," Buffy sighed. "The point is the it will keep me occupied most of the evening, and I told him that, so…he wants to come with me," a little smile entered her eyes. "Faith'll be thrilled," the smile reached her lips, dissolving into a smirk.
"You don't have to patrol with Faith, you know," the redhead pointed out.
"No, I guess I don't, but…"
"But you don't want him to come," Willow guessed.
"I *do* want him to come!" the blonde moaned in frustration. "It's not that-"
"You're afraid he's not ready yet," her friend observed knowingly.
The Slayer nodded. "It's that. It's just the thought of him getting hurt, and I…there's no way in Hell Giles will let me off the hook this time, right?"
"Exactly," came her Watcher's reply, who that very moment walked by their table with a book in his hand.
She groaned, leaning back in her chair.
"Buffy, you're going," he didn't even give her time to protest, knowing what was to come. "I wouldn't have insisted, if I had thought Faith could take care of it by herself."
"And why can't she?" the blonde rose from her seat, and started tailing after him about the library.
"Because I need the two of you," he explained. "Why can't you go? Angel is feeling better…"
"That's the problem," she cut in, sighing, and stopped her marching in his office's doorframe. "He's so much 'better' that he wants to join me."
The Watcher turned to look at her, and shook his head. "It's not a good idea…"
"Gee, you think?" she folded her arms on her chest, leaning against the doorframe. "But it's Angel we're talking about here, I have no guarantee whatsoever he won't go either way, even if I don't take him with me. If Angel wants, Angel does."
"Reminds me of someone I know," Giles muttered under his breath, allowing a little grin he knew his Slayer wouldn't perceive.
"Hey!" Buffy had obviously picked up his remark.
"So, don't take him with you," the Englishman suggested.
"Did you even *hear* what I've just said?" his Slayer threw her hands in the air. "I don't think I have much of a choice. And besides, what is Faith gonna say?" she certainly didn't know how to break the news to her sister-Slayer. Faith wasn't very fond of her boyfriend, and though she had been doing her best in trying to avoid Angel for the past couple of weeks, Buffy had a really hard time getting the memory of her beating him nearly to death out of her head. And to top that, there was also the promise she had given Faith, regarding not pushing her towards Angel unless she's ready to, and taking him out on patrol with the two of them equaled breaking said promise.
"Well, why don't you ask her yourself?" Giles motioned with one hand at something behind the blonde, and she rotated, facing the brunette Slayer.
"Faith," she gasped, her eyes searching the girl's for *any* clue as to what she was thinking at the moment. "I-I was gonna talk to you about it…"
"I bet," Faith replied nonchalantly.
"Look," Buffy sighed, "I don't know what to do, okay?"
"You can always say 'no', but I'm guessing that option never exactly crossed your mind," she remarked steely.
"Look, Faith, we can," Buffy sighed guiltily; she *wanted* him to come. She gazed pleadingly at the other Slayer. "We can split…ok? We'll split, you won't have to see him at all, I promise. It'll be good," she turned at Giles, gesturing her hand for support, "we can cover more area in less time."
"Well," the Watcher stuttered, clearing his throat, "I presume…"
The brunette rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She didn't like it one bit. She didn't want the vampire to come, and even less she wanted to share the blonde Slayer with him. Though it surprised her, Buffy was the first real friend Faith had made in…years. She didn't want to lose her, and she felt that if things stayed the way they were, she was sure to, and what's worse – lose her to her vampire lover. But she couldn't protest either. As much as it annoyed her, Buffy *was* the 'Watcher's Pet'. From the relatively short period of time Faith had been to Sunnydale, she had managed to perceive the pattern of the relationship between Rupert Giles and Buffy Summers. And it wasn't one of a Watcher and his Slayer, or rather – not the one Faith had been accustomed to, with her Watcher. Giles cared for the girl, he understood her, he tried to shield her from the basic aspect of her duty as Slayer, and he went easy on her. Faith sometimes wondered how it must have been like, to be that significant to someone. But then again, Buffy was significant to a lot of people…her lover included. "When do you want us off?" she asked the Watcher.
Giles briefly checked his watch. "Right now, actually," he replied, addressing it to both girls.
"I'll go pick up Angel," Buffy informed, leaving the library.
Faith sighed, watching the other Slayer go, then turned to the Watcher. "I'll see you later," she said dryly, and followed the blonde.
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