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Disclaimer: Sorry, I don’t own a damn thing when it comes to my favorite subject: Buffy and Angel!
Distribution: You must ask me. Please. It would be very much appreciated. Thank you...YOU HAVE TO ASK!
Spoilers: Big time spoiler for Becoming Part One and Two and the second season. But, if you haven’t seen those, well then I might question your love for Buffy and Angel...I’m just kidding.
Rating: PG
Author’s Notes: The first in the All I Wanted Series. This takes place at the end of "Becoming, Part 2", right when Angel gets his soul back. So, if you like the way the actual episode ended, then don’t read this. Because there is a different ending. Also, the fic takes place during the night. Not day, like in the episode.
Feedback: If I had chocolate-covered Angel to give you, I’d give him to you.
Summary: What if Buffy had made a different decision at the end of "Becoming, Part 2"?

Awards Won:
The Runner Up for Best Episode Re-write at The Two Hearts, One Soul Awards, Round 1
The Runner Up for Best Episode Re-write at The Eternal Flame Awards, Round 2

***

Buffy Summers clung to the vampire in her arms, holding him to her, afraid to let go. The deadly sword in her right arm was momentarily forgotten at the revelation of her lover, Angel. The glow in his eyes... Oh, my God, my Angel, my Angel, Oh, my God... It was all too good to be true.

Buffy closed her eyes in relief and disbelief, listening to his rambling lovingly, reveling in the kiss he dropped on her shoulder. It was too obvious he didn’t remember the last few months and the horrible terror he had brought to Sunnydale. When he had been his demon half, Angelus. The times he had killed, tortured, tormented... Buffy’s eyes tightened at the memory of the pain he had inflicted on her and her loved ones.

A sudden sucking sound drew her away from her thoughts and her eyes snapped open only to the see the mouth of the demon, Acathla, opening and a blue and white vortex appearing, slowly growing bigger. She felt a light wind build up as the demon’s mouth widened. Her eyes grew wide and fear laced through her veins as her mind raced. What would she do? She just got her love back and she would rather kill herself than do him any harm of any kind, especially after what he went through, or would go through. She would rather throw herself off a cliff and burn in Hell than...why couldn’t she just do that? Slit her own wrists and walk...no, what Whistler said...

“Only his blood will open the vortex, kid. And only his blood will close it.”

Buffy sniffled slightly and closed her eyes once more, burying her face in the crook of Angel’s neck.

“I just got you,” she whispered softly. Angel tried to pull away but couldn’t escape her death-like hold on him.

“Buffy?”

Ignoring him, Buffy figured she only had two options: send her one true love to Hell and regret it for the rest of her life or take a chance and put some of his blood on the sword and throw it in. What she wanted was risky and she knew she would do it in a heartbeat. She could give a shit about the rest of the world. She only needed her Angel. Nobody else mattered. I’ll do it.

Finally pulling back from the safety of his arms, Buffy looked up into his warm eyes. She saw confusion and wonder. She saw love and trust. Choking back a sob, she wondered how long it would take before he remembered everything that has happened. He must be so confused. Forcing an empty smile on her face, she looked at him with wide eyes. He smiled back, worried, and Buffy breathing in, leaning closer to him, choosing not to look past him and see the horribly large vortex. As wind filled the hall, she spoke softly.

“Do you trust me?”

Angel only stared at her. “Of course I do, baby. What-”

Buffy silenced him by placing her fingers over his lips. It would be better to explain things later, rather than talk about anything sensible right now. He didn’t object. Buffy pulled back further and held out her free hand, the deadly sword Kendra had delivered still in her other hand.

“Let me see your hand.”

He placed his in hers. Buffy lifted the heavy sword and placed in on his hand. Not looking up at him, she swiftly brought it across his fragile skin and blood that wasn’t his rose to the surface, aching to heal the deep wound. Closing his fingers around it, she fisted her hand over his and looked up at him.

Silent pain mixed with terror and love was apparent on his face as he stared at his hand, then in her eyes. He was about to question what was happening, why there was so much wind and a feeling of dread in his heart, but Buffy cut him off.

“I love you, Angel. Never forget that,” she said, her voice pleading him to never do it. She didn’t know what she would do if she had to push him through the vortex if the sword didn’t work. She probably couldn’t even do that.

“I love you, too,” he responded, worried, not bothering to question anything, knowing she wouldn’t answer. What the hell was going on? Why did she look so different? So hurt? So much older than he had last seen her? What had happened? And where were they?

“Promise me you won’t look behind you,” she whispered loud enough for his vampiric hearing to pick up in the swirling air. He nodded slightly and Buffy’s face crinkled in pain as she stepped forward and forced herself into his arms. They immediately wound around her body protectively and Angel fought the urge to look back and see what was happening.

Facing the vortex, Buffy stared in horror at the vortex that was the size of them and reaching for the ceiling. Swallowing roughly, Buffy threw the sword, her aim flawless and landed in the center of the white and blue hell. She felt hope and dread fill her at the same time and waited for a split second before gasping. The air crackled and sparked as bolts of lightening flew here and there. Purple filled her vision as a lump filled her throat and she clung to the vampire in her arms as a tear tracked down her cheek. The vortex picked up speed and she knew that if they let go of each other, the wind would pick them up and throw them around. It grew impossibly big and Buffy burrowed her face into Angel’s should, thinking she had failed. At least they would go out with each other.

Finally allowing herself to cry, Buffy felt everything inside of her drop like a heavy weight and she felt the irresistible urge to just fall to the ground and wait for the end. But Angel was there to keep her up and he steadied her as she sobbed into his shoulder.

Neither noticed the large vortex suddenly disappear, leaving Acathla dormant.

The couple finally collapsed to the floor and Buffy never noticed the still air or the empty echoes of her cries. Angel rubbed her back and whispered words of comfort in her ears, wondering what had happened and where everyone was.

They sat like that until Buffy finally looked up from her internal hell and risked a glance around them. Seeing nothing but the empty mansion, Buffy sucked in a hurried gasp and let out a shriek. Angel jumped and pulled back to look at her, his blood smeared all over her shirt.

“Buffy?”

“Angel?” Buffy looked up at the dark vampire. “You’re alive? We’re not dead?”

“No. What happened? What’s going on? Why are you so...why is your hair so long?” Angel picked up a lock of her hair and dropped it to stare into her eyes.

Buffy almost laughed had she not remembered the ultimate truth behind his words. He didn’t remember anything that had happened in the last months. How could he not? Everything Angelus did...

“Where are we?”

Instead of answering his more immediate questions, Buffy opted for kissing. Leaning forward, Buffy pressed her lips to his fully and kissed him desperately. He immediately responded. Oh, my Angel. You’re here. You’re real. Oh, how I love you. IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou.

“Buffy, what happened?” Angel’s voice was filled with confusion. Buffy once again wondered how long it would take for him to remember.

Sniffling, Buffy stood and helped Angel stand.

“Can we go home, Angel?”

He nodded and attempted to speak before she stopped him. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell you everything. But, first, you’re hurt.”

Following Buffy outside, they raced against the rising sun to his abandoned apartment.

The End

 

l be kind, rewind l back to top l


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