A couple of weeks later Willow decided to drop by Spike's one day during a
break between classes and the Scooby meeting. As she cut through the
cemetary, she became aware of noise emanating from his crypt; it sounded
like there was a fight going on inside. Concerned, she ran the rest of the
way and threw open the door.

What she found was Spike, alone, throwing broken-off bits of the statues
that had been decorating the crypt and tossing around his few pieces of
furniture, all the while yelling a string of curses at himself, his chip,
and some unnamed person who wasn't even there.

"Spike," Willow asked, stepping further into the crypt, "what's wrong?" He
just ignored her, continuing his rant, until she went over and grabbed his
arm; then he turned his rage on her.

"And you! You're as bad as he is! Wouldn't be here if it weren't for that
bloody Initiative! But no, Spike's all *harmless* now, perfectly safe to go
about interrupting him!"

"Wha-? Spike, I don't know what has you so angry, specifically I mean,
'cause I've figured out that it's got to do with the chip, but most of the
time you deal with that pretty well, so there's got to be something
else...but that's so not why I'm here. I trust you. I mean, okay, without
the chip I'd have been dead for over a year now and we wouldn't have had a
chance to become friends, but now that we are...well, I don't believe you'd
hurt me anymore, even if there were no more chip. Maybe it's stupid of me,
but I do trust you. And that has nothing to do with what the Initiative did
to you."

She could see some of the anger and frustration in his eyes slowly turn
questioning. "You trust me?" he repeated, his tone a little calmer now but
heavily laced with suspicion.

"Yeah, I do. I mean, I know you haven't gone all good or anything, and that
if you got rid of the chip I know I can't expect you to, oh, be nice to my
friends, much less random people, but I do trust you not to intentionally
hurt *me*. We're friends now, right?"

Willow watched as he visibly forced aside the violent feelings he'd been
giving vent to when she arrived and got himself under control once more.
"Friends. Yeah."

"So tell me, what happened?"

"Soldier boy," he fumed, pulling away from her to pace back and forth
through the crypt. At least he'd stopped throwing things. "Came to threaten
me if I didn't give him some information. Information which," he pointed
out, "I don't even have in the first place."

"Riley? He *threatened* you?" Willow couldn't believe it. Could he really be
that stupid?

"You heard me. It's become his favourite hobby, these past few months."

"What?! He's done this more than once? Oooh, he is so going to pay!" Willow
stormed out, too furious to even pay attention to how much sunlight was
coming in through the door.

Her anger just grew on the way to Giles'. She burst through the door, barely
noticing the surprise on her friends' faces. "Where is he?" she demanded.

"Willow, what--" Buffy began, but she'd already spotted him.

Stalking over to Riley, she began poking him in the chest, following him as
he backed away from her. "How *dare* you?!? What gives you the right to
threaten one of my friends? You, you mean little weasel! No, you're not just
a weasel, you're a *cowardly* weasel! You wouldn't have dared threaten him
like that if he were whole! But now that your precious Initiative has, has
crippled him, you can't resist going over and rubbing it in his face, just
because you know he can't fight back! Well, that's enough! If I hear of you
doing anything like that again, I'll...I'll find some spell to cast on
you--and trust me, you don't want me doing magic when I'm this upset! So
just stay away," she ordered him with one final poke, glaring up at him with
what she hoped was a combination of her resolve face and an expression of
righteous anger.

Everyone just stared at her in surprise, uncertain as to what might have
caused her outburst. Finally Xander asked, "Okay, now what was that all
about?"

Willow calmed down just enough to turn to the others and explain in a tight
voice, "Soldier-boy here has been threatening Spike."

"He what?" Buffy looked at her boyfriend, who was still up against the wall,
rubbing the bruise now forming on his chest. "Are you insane?"

"What's the big deal? He's the bad guy, remember? You threaten him all the
time."

"Riley, you can be so clueless sometimes. If something goes wrong and that
chip ever stops working, you've probably put yourself at the top of Spike's
list of people to go after first! I may threaten him, but I did that
pre-chip, too; I know I can handle myself against him. You can't. He's good,
Riley. I've fought him I don't know how many times, and never managed to
dust him. If he comes after you, you won't stand a chance. And besides," she
pointed out, "I haven't really threatened him in weeks. Willow's right; we
don't have to like all her other friends, but we shouldn't go around trying
to kill them for no reason."

Riley looked around and saw that everyone seemed to feel the same way. "I
don't believe you people! As Spike himself has been so fond of reminding us,
he's evil. Am I really the only one who remembers he was helping Adam?"

"No, you're not, and frankly, I hate the guy only slightly less than Angel,"
Xander agreed. "But as far as we know, he hasn't tried anything against us
since he and Willow became friends, and for her sake, we've all agreed to
tolerate him until he does. And Buffy's right; if he ever finds a way to get
rid of the chip, I so don't want to be the one he goes after for his first
kill in years. Call me crazy, but I like my blood right where it is, thanks.
Not to mention the rest of my body parts."

"Unless you know something we don't, and he actually has been plotting
something behind our backs?" Buffy asked.

"Uh...well...not exactly."

"What do you mean, 'not exactly'? Not at all! You don't know of anything
because there isn't anything to know!"

"Whoa, Willow, calm down. He's not going to do it again, are you, Riley?"

He exchanged a long look with his girlfriend, then glanced from her
determined face to those of the rest of the Slayerettes, before sighing in
resignation. "Fine. I won't go threaten Hostile 17 unless I have evidence
he's up to his old tricks. Everybody happy?"

"I'm not sure I can trust you," Willow declared loftily.

"Will...."

"Oh, fine, Buffy. But I'm officially not pleased."

Luckily, it was easy to keep Riley and Spike apart for a while, but a few
days later a meeting of the full extended Scooby Gang was called to research
a particularly unpleasant Sorsa demon, and they had no choice. Willow was in
the bathroom when Spike arrived, so she didn't see how Riley nervously put
as much of the room as possible between himself and the vampire. Spike
noticed, however, and asked about it before he could stop himself.

"He's just afraid."

A smirk crept onto his face as he took that in, and his bearing took on a
predatory tone as he began to circle Riley, eyes never leaving him. "Is he
now? Well, isn't this interesting...."

Since Spike couldn't hurt Riley, Giles decided not to interfere; the
vampire's reaction to learning that Willow had been protecting him should be
a good indication of how he actually felt about her. Somehow the thought of
William the Bloody blithely accepting that he might need a human girl to
defend him seemed...unlikely. Best to find out now, while he was still
chipped.

"Oh, he's not afraid of you," Anya clarified matter-of-factly. "He's afraid
of Willow."

This time Spike's gaze flew to her. "What? Of *Willow*?"

"Yep."

"Is that right?"

"Probably has something to do with the fact that the other day she stormed
in here and yelled at him for being mean to you and threatened him with
magic if he did it again."

"Oh, and we pointed out how very careless it was to risk having you come
after him first if you're ever de-chipped," Xander added, hoping this small
show of support might help move him a bit further down that list of
potential victims. Spike's smirk grew into a surprised, yet delighted,
smile.

"Well, well. I must say, this is a fascinating development. I like it. Just
wish I'd been here to see that; big, strong Soldier-boy cowering from
someone half his size. Musta been a beautiful sight."

"Just shut up," Riley snapped. He then noticed that Willow had rejoined
them, and quickly mumbled an apology. Spike burst out laughing.

"So. Now that Red's shown everyone who's boss around here, what say we get
started with the research so we can go out and kill this thing already?"

Part 7

As Willow's birthday grew closer, she became more and more excited. Normally
she wasn't really into celebrating her birthday--she'd given up on the party
idea when she turned ten and the only people to show up had been Xander and
Jesse, even though more than twenty kids had been invited--but this year was
different. She knew her friends had something planned for her, but not even
Xander allowed the slightest bit of information to slip out, no matter how
much she begged. The only clue she had was that Buffy'd hinted about making
sure she had a really nice dress to wear. Willow was grateful for that much,
at least, since it gave her a chance to go buy one. Pretty much the only
dresses she had that could be considered "really nice" were the ones she'd
worn to Homecoming and the prom her senior year of high school, and both of
those had Associations she'd really rather not drag up again....

When the day arrived, all Buffy would tell her was that they were meeting
everyone at Giles'. The whole way over there, Willow pestered her with
questions and pleas for information, but for once the Slayer remained
completely silent, just smiling in that "I know something you don't, and I'm
not telling" way that was so annoying when it wasn't directed at someone
else. When they arrived, the only person present was Giles himself, also
dressed up. There was no sign of anything party-like, aside from a couple of
wrapped gifts on the desk, to which Buffy added her own. They stood around
chatting as they waited for the rest of the gang to arrive.

When Spike stepped into the room, Willow's breath caught. He was still
dressed all in black, but he'd traded in the jeans for slacks and the faded
T-shirt for silk. Somehow it made his skin look paler than usual and his
eyes more piercing. The overall result was...striking.

"Wow," she heard Buffy murmur in her ear, "who would've thought Spike would
clean up so well? Almost a shame he's such a jerk."

"Yeah," Willow breathed, unable to take her eyes off him.

Then his gaze met hers, and she couldn't help blushing--both for having been
caught staring, and because, if the look in his eyes was any indication, he
seemed to like the way she looked that night as well.

She barely noticed when Buffy left to say something to Xander, who'd just
arrived, because Spike chose that moment to stroll over to her,
deliberately, as if he knew the effect he was having on her.

"Happy birthday, pet," he said with a slight smirk.

"Thanks," she managed to reply. "Um, you look nice."

"Nice? That's all? I was trying for drop-dead gorgeous," he pouted, eyes
sparkling with mischief.

"But you already are."

"Oh, you think I'm gorgeous?"

"That's not--I meant--oh, you know, the 'dead' part!" Willow spluttered,
blush deepening.

Spike just laughed. "I know, love. And you're lovely tonight yourself."

"Thanks." She took a moment to bask in the compliment before going to greet
Xander and Anya. She hadn't even realised the others would have included
Spike, and now there he was, looking like that, saying *she* looked good.
And it was Spike, so the chances he was just being polite were pretty darn
slim. She couldn't stop grinning at the thought.

Once everyone had arrived, they all piled into Giles' and Riley's cars.
Willow was delighted when they pulled into the parking lot of one of
Sunnydale's few upscale restaurants; she'd always wanted to go there, but it
had seemed too grown-up and sophisticated. It surprised her that this was
where they were bringing her, though, since it was hardly the kind of place
any of them would frequent. In fact, as she thought about it she realised
that Cordelia was probably the only person she knew who'd eaten there at
all.

They had a tense moment going in, since Spike flatly refused to wear a
jacket or tie, but to everyone's relief he just brushed past the maitre d'
to their table rather than starting a scene.

She wondered a bit at the way Buffy and Xander seemed determined to take the
seats on either side of Spike, leaving her at the far end of the table even
though she was the only one there who did more than just tolerate him, but
she soon got too caught up in the novelty of the whole experience to care.

Willow enjoyed the meal tremendously; the food was good, but even better was
just being with all her friends, enjoying an evening out with not even a
mention of the Hellmouth. She had to bite her lip to keep from giggling at
the sight of Xander trying to figure out which fork to use, and though
everyone else was on their best behaviour, Spike amused himself by declining
to order and then filching bits of each course off of Buffy's plate, just to
be annoying. Her roommate was struggling to remain mature nonetheless, but
in Willow's opinion, she should've known better than to tempt the vampire by
sitting next to him. She did good, though, and managed not to do anything
that might make Giles embarrassed to be seen with them all. All in all,
Willow decided, she couldn't have asked for a better way to celebrate her
birthday--with her real family, rather than those people who were
technically her parents.

As they finished their main courses, the couples got up to dance while
waiting for the dessert to be served. Willow watched them wistfully for a
while, then turned back to find Spike looking at her.

"Dance, pet?" he asked casually. She glanced at Giles to see if he would
mind being left alone, but he just told her to go ahead if she wanted, so
she accepted gladly. She was surprised at how right it felt, dancing in
Spike's arms. Although he'd joined them at the Bronze several times, he had
always been adamant about staying off the dance floor, so she'd never had a
chance to dance with him before. He held her comfortably, and they
immediately fell into step with one another. The song ended, but Spike made
no move to return to the table, and she was quite content to remain dancing,
even though their dessert had arrived and the others had abandoned the dance
floor in favour of pastries. About halfway through a third song, she glanced
up to find him looking at her with an intensity that made her feel all warm
and fuzzy. He began to lean towards her, and she felt her heart speed up in
anticipation of a kiss, only to have him let go of her entirely and step
back. Willow looked at him, confused, but he just stood there with an
unreadable expression and said shakily, "We need to stop now." Without
waiting for a response, he turned and strode back to the table, leaving her
standing there wondering what she'd done wrong.

*************

Spike studiously avoided looking at Willow as she returned to the group.
Even so, he kept seeing her face fall as he forced himself to release her.
He struggled to maintain an impassive expression as the Slayer and her
groupies prattled on over coffee, all the while berating himself for being
such a fool. Finally he couldn't take it anymore; it was too hard to
remember all the reasons he had to be careful about Willow when she was
sitting right there at the same table with him.

"Going out for a smoke," he announced suddenly. Seeing Willow rise as if to
follow him, he caught her eye and added firmly, "Alone." He told himself
sternly that whether or not she looked hurt at his order to stay away from
him temporarily didn't matter to him one bit.

Once safely out of the restaurant, he lit up and began to pace furiously.
What had he been thinking, asking her to dance? Other than that it was
supposed to be a special day for her, but all her little friends were paired
off and she looked like she was feeling left out...but what did he care, if
a human was sad on her bloody birthday? And had he really thought he could
hold her in his arms, in what was basically a romantic setting, and not want
more? It was madness. He'd decided long ago that it was best to just forget
about her, but did he listen to himself? No! He went and became friends with
her! But it had to stop there. She would grow old and die one day, and as
long as he had the bloody chip there wasn't anything he could do about it.
Also, she was the Slayer's friend, for god's sake! If he did manage to get
rid of the chip, she would certainly ask him to continue getting his blood
from bags, and there was no way he could do that. He could hardly stand it
even now, when he had no choice in the matter.

Of course, that was assuming she would even want him to begin with. The only
sign she'd ever given of any interest was that one vague statement back
before he'd gone and encouraged her to get involved with someone else. At
least, he thought, he had *tried* to give her up; was it his fault the thing
with Tara didn't work out, which ended up drawing him and Willow closer
rather than apart?

But he'd had to go and almost mess it up. Sure, she may have seemed
disappointed at the time, but that was just the situation--birthday, all
dressed up, fancy dinner, dancing...if he'd actually kissed her, she
would've regretted it once the magic of the evening had worn off. And then
where would he be? Probably without even her friendship. Besides, she'd been
hurt too much already in her short life; of course she wouldn't want to
start something knowing it was doomed from the beginning, no matter how much
the other person--cared about her.

Spike remained outside until at length the others had paid the bill and were
ready to return to the Watcher's. He noticed with some regret that while
waiting for the valet to bring the cars around, Willow watched him sadly,
but made no move to approach him. She even waited until he'd gotten into
Giles' car, then headed straight for Riley's. Seemed she was giving him the
space he needed to get himself back under control, which was what he wanted.
Right?

Once back at Giles', Spike hung out on the stairs as everyone watched Willow
open her small pile of presents. She seemed to like everything, but after
thanking the others she cast a short, sad look to the now-empty spot where
the unopened gifts had been, and gave a soft sigh. Trying to appear cheerful
rather than disappointed, she said, "Thanks again, everyone, for dinner and
the presents. This was a much better birthday than I would've had at home."
She stood and began gathering her things, preparing to leave.

"Wait, Red," Spike called out. "You're forgetting one." Standing and
approaching the group for the first time since dinner, he pulled something
out of his pocket and handed it to Willow. Glancing up at him in surprise,
she reached out and took the small bundle.

Carefully peeling away the newspaper he'd wrapped it in, she gasped as she
caught sight of the contents, her eyes flying back to his. "Spike, it's
beautiful!" she exclaimed, holding up a silver necklace with an
intricately-worked pendant for the others to see.

"Wow, Wills, it really is. Who knew Spike had such good taste?"

"Enough, Buffy. If that's what I think it is, beauty is the least of its
value," Giles said, awed.

"Okay, G-man, so what do you think it is?"

"Well, it's hard to be certain, because there are, are no extant pictures,
but if the descriptions I've read are accurate, then I, I strongly suspect
that's--"

"The Kamarás Pendant," Spike confirmed.

"B-but it's been missing for centuries. How on earth did you find it?"

He shrugged. "Let's just say I know a guy who knows a guy who was able to
get it from the master who's been guarding it all this time."

"Giles, what's so special about this cummer-thing, anyway?" Buffy
interrupted.

"Well, I think Spike would be better able to answer that than I...."

"Oh, all right," he sighed. "In essence, the Kamarás Pendant...gives off
this signal, warning vampires that the wearer is poisonous, I suppose."

"So they don't bite?" He nodded. "Ooh, neat. We gotta get me one of those,
Giles!"

"Yeah, Buffy probably needs this more than I do...."

"Absolutely not. I did not call in all those favours to get this thing
brought out of hiding just for it to end up with a bloody Slayer. If you
don't want it, I'll send it back."

"Oh, it's not that I don't want it! I just...thought it might make more
sense."

"It's okay, Will; I'll just stick with my stakes," Buffy reassured her.

"In any case, how exactly does it work? I understand there's a, a ritual
involved...."

"Yeah. You perform the ritual, then as long as you're wearing the pendant,
you'll be safe. Don't go thinking you'll just lend it to Buffy, either," he
told Willow, "as the wearer has to have personally done the spell for it to
work."

"One thing I've always wondered," Giles broke in, "is whether it actually
causes a person's blood to be toxic to vampires, or is it just the
possibility that's supposed to act as a deterrant?"

"Well, let me put it this way, mate. Vampires have legends about this
pendant going back over two thousand years. Now, in all the stories about
it, I've never once heard anyone claim to have survived drinking from a
person wearing it at the time, unless the pendant hadn't been properly
activated. Considering the status this thing has in the vampire world, I'd
say it's highly unlikely that anyone who did defeat it would keep quiet
about having done so, wouldn't you?"

"Yes, quite. Now, about that ritual...."

"Yeah, I've got the details on that, too." He paused, then decided he had to
tell her. "There's just one more thing. There's not a bloody thing stopping
any vampire who recognises the effect of the Kamarás Pendant for what it is
from taking it off you and then draining you with no worries."

Willow just said, "So, don't let vampires get close enough to remove
necklace. Got it." He could tell the Watcher'd understood his true warning,
though, so if he ever got rid of the chip and did something...irreversible,
at least they couldn't say he'd tricked them. Not that he cared what they
thought.

Once again Willow went around thanking everybody, more sincerely this time,
and hugging each in turn. He knew that just a couple of hours earlier, she
would not have hesitated to give him a hug as well, but instead she merely
stood there looking up at him and said softly, "Thank you, Spike, for
coming--and for the pendant. It was very thoughtful of you, and I'll be sure
not to take it off once I've done the ritual. I probably won't want to,
anyway; it's lovely."

"I'm glad you like it," he told her quietly, watching as she turned and
left, Slayer in tow.

Once the kids were all gone, he gave Giles all the information they'd need
to activate the pendant. Somehow, staying away for a while seemed a good
idea just then, and he wanted to make sure Willow would be protected first.

Part 8
 

Buffy was concerned. While Willow hadn't said anything to indicate she was
unhappy, she didn't seem quite like herself. Hadn't, really, since her
birthday, and Buffy was afraid she knew why. She wasn't acting like she had
when Oz and Tara left, but she still seemed unusually down, and it was
almost certainly that damn vampire's fault.

She didn't think Willow was in love with Spike, really, though they'd been
spending an awful lot of time together, even more so since they'd stopped
having to hide their friendship from everyone. So that wasn't the
problem--or maybe it was, though in a different way....

Buffy wasn't blind; she'd seen the way Spike acted around her roommate once
the need for secrecy was gone. He was always touching her; nothing
inappropriate, really, but he always had a hand on her arm, an arm around
her shoulders. He'd walk next to her and put his hand on the small of her
back--a gesture Buffy would think adorably old-fashioned were it not coming
from someone who'd lived through times when that was the norm, not to
mention someone she didn't find remotely adorable. Occasionally he even
played with Willow's hair. It was like he couldn't keep his hands off
her--and she didn't even seem to notice, much less care.

And then there were the looks. He'd look over or down at her--only rarely
across the room, since he was usually either next to Willow or standing
behind wherever she was sitting--and his face would soften, his normally
closed, disdainful expression instead conveying tolerance, amusement, or
fondness; sometimes all three. It was hard to reconcile with the Spike she'd
been fighting for over four years, and she could only come up with one
explanation: Spike was falling for her friend.

At that birthday dinner, she'd done her best to keep them apart. She
couldn't keep him from coming--Willow would've been hurt if she'd tried--but
when she saw how he looked, and how he was looking at her, the danger seemed
too great to just do nothing. So she had convinced Xander that they should
sit next to him, and they did a pretty good job of keeping the two apart for
much of the evening.

Then Riley asked her to dance, and she agreed, not thinking about the fact
that Anya would insist on dancing as well, causing Xander to abandon his
post. It wasn't too much longer before they were joined by the very couple
she was trying to prevent. They didn't seem to be doing anything other than
dancing as friends, though, so she returned her attention to Riley.

Later she did see what looked like an attempt on his part to finally make a
move, however. Willow's back was to the table, so Buffy couldn't see her
reaction, but it must not have been good, since before she could get up to
go do anything about it, he'd let go of her friend and returned to the table
of his own accord, clearly in a bad mood. It soon became obvious that
something had upset Willow as well, and if he'd finally revealed that he
wanted more from their relationship but she just wanted to stay friends...if
he refused, said it was all or nothing, well, that would explain it.

They hardly saw him any more, aside from the more serious bouts of slayage,
and from what she could tell, he had hardly said two words to Willow since
explaining about her pendant. To someone who took her few friendships as
seriously as she did, that was bound to cause the distress Buffy had been
sensing. It was time she did something about that.

On a nice, sunny afternoon she burst into his crypt, intentionally leaving
the door wide open so the sunlight pouring in could serve as a little
reminder of just how easily she could kill him these days.

"Bloody hell!" he exclaimed. "Don't you people ever knock?"

"Can it, Spike. I don't want to hear a word out of you that isn't part of an
explanation of what the hell you think you're doing."

"Trying to sleep, last I checked," he shot back.

"Very funny. I don't know what your problem is lately, though I can guess,
but this avoidance thing you've got going is really hurting Willow. God
knows why, 'cause I sure don't, but she actually likes you, and this silent
treatment isn't exactly something those of us with actual feelings do to
friends. If you care about Willow at all, you'll stop letting her think
she's done something to make you hate her."

"I don't know what you're talking about," he claimed unconvincingly. "I'm
not avoiding anything. I'll have you know that on occasion I do have better
things to do than hang around a bunch of children."

"Uh huh. And just what was it you and Willow fought about that night at
dinner, anyway?"

Spike shrugged and averted his gaze. "No fight. I wanted to stop dancing,
she didn't. End of story."

"Right. So you've been sulking for weeks over whether or not to keep
dancing?"

"Hey! I do not sulk."

"Whatever. In any case, you can do it just as well around Willow. It's
hardly as if we've never dealt with you in a bad mood before."

He let out a sharp bark of laughter. "You've never seen anything of the
sort, sweetheart. And if I were you, I'd hope you never do. I'm not stupid,
Slayer, but somehow people always underestimate me. I think it's the accent;
or maybe the hair. Whatever the reason, none of you Slayerettes seem to have
given any thought to how bloody stupid it was, taking me into your little
Scooby Gang. Because I watch, I listen...I observe. And I learn. I now know
more about each of you than you can possibly imagine, and someday I'm going
to use that knowledge to destroy you all."

"Yeah, yeah, like sire like childe, I know all the threats, Spike. You don't
scare me."

"Oh, Slayer, I am nothing like Angel," he corrected, his voice menacing.
"All my sire would do is leave the broken bodies of your friends in your
bed, driving you mad before he comes and kills you. I, on the other hand,"
he continued, stalking deliberately toward her and dropping his voice to a
low tone that was somehow more threatening than all his yelling had ever
been, "would never do anything so crude and...unpoetic. No, I wouldn't lay a
hand on any of you until long after you'd begun begging for death. I would
break you with words alone; I know just the things to say to cause each and
every one of you more pain than you can imagine. And through it all, you
will retain what sanity you have, because how else can you truly suffer? And
the beauty of it is, the worst pain will come from knowing all the while,
deep down, that every single word I say is nothing but the truth.

"But the best part?" he concluded, having backed Buffy across the crypt
until her back was against the wall and Spike was standing closer than she
ever would have allowed him if she weren't so caught in the scenario he was
painting. "The very best part, my dear Slayer, is that since I won't even
need to touch you to destroy you utterly, there's not a thing the sodding
chip will do to stop me."

"So if I were you, I wouldn't be taking the idea of me in a bad mood so
lightly. Consider this your one and only warning."

"If you can do all that without setting off the implant, why haven't you?"
Buffy retorted, hoping she sounded far less frightened than she was feeling.
She confessed to herself that she'd nearly forgotten what Spike could be
like before he'd been rendered harmless--or so they'd thought--and she
didn't think she'd ever seen quite this side of him before. Usually he'd
just gone straight for the fighting, limiting his comments to taunts and
insults. She found herself wishing for that Spike back; at least she knew
how to deal with him.

"Now, now, what fun would it be if I just took you apart first chance I got?
At first I didn't know any of you well enough, now I'm waiting for a day
when I really need to cheer myself up; can only destroy you once, after all,
so I'd like to get as much satisfaction out of it as I can. Of course," he
shrugged, "if you keep pushing me, that day just might come sooner than you
think."

Carefully extracting herself from her position between Spike and the crypt
wall, Buffy put some distance between them. "You wouldn't do it, not
anymore; it would hurt Willow too much, and you do care about her now."

His jaw clenched briefly, but his voice remained calm as he replied, "Maybe.
Then again, maybe not. Do you really want to risk so much on your own
pathetic understanding of what I might or might not feel?"

"That does it. I've tried to be accepting about all this and make up for
being such a bad friend for much of last year, but if I *ever* find out
you've just been toying with Willow, pretending to be her friend only so you
could hurt her later, I'll kill you so fast you won't even know I'm there
till it's too late, no matter what she wants," Buffy warned him, her voice
still shaking slightly from his own threats.

"Yeah. You do that. In the meantime, I'll be back when and if I want to be,
so there's no need for you to go wasting my time like this again," he
answered coldly. Unable to think of a good reply, she left, determined to
keep a closer eye on him if he did rejoin the group. If it seemed she'd been
wrong, and rather than being in love with Willow he didn't even care about
her at all, Buffy wouldd have to find a way to keep him from hurting her any
more than he had already.

Part 9

Willow had finally caved in and let her friends drag her to the Bronze, even
though it was the last place she felt like being. They were only trying to
cheer her up, she knew, but she couldn't even pretend it was working. She'd
taken one look at all the people dancing and remembered that night--and that
meant remembering Spike, and before anyone knew it she was in tears once
again.

As soon as the others noticed, they'd returned to the table and tried to
comfort her. She couldn't do much more than sit there, the necklace he'd
given her in her hands, sobbing. It was the last thing he'd ever give her,
and though she knew it couldn't do its job if she kept taking it off, she
couldn't stop looking at it.

"Look, Will, we don't know for sure that he's dead," Buffy was saying for
the hundredth time. "Maybe...maybe he'd found somewhere else to spend the
day."

"B-but every day? No one's seen him in over a week! I...I've gone by the,
the crypt each day since you said he was missing, a-and..." Willow was
unable to make herself finish the sentence.

"Hey, Wills, look on the bright side," Xander offered, attempting to lighten
the mood, "at least you don't have to worry about--" He cut himself off when
Willow, clearly not listening, suddenly looked up and gasped. Before anyone
had time to ask why, she flew off her stool and flung herself at someone
who'd come up behind them. Turning, they saw her clinging to Spike, face
buried in his chest.

"You're alive!" she exclaimed, tears now turning to those of relief.

"Uh...yeah, pet," she heard him say, as his arms tentatively closed around
her. "What'd I miss?"

"Oh, they all thought you were dust," Anya explained, bored with the whole
thing.

"Any particular reason, or just wishful thinking on the Slayer's part?"

Buffy sighed, exasperated with him already. "Look, about a week ago I went
by to tell you to get to Giles' as soon as the sun went down, and your crypt
was empty. Obviously you hadn't made it back by sunrise, and since you never
did turn up anywhere, it seemed likely you'd been killed. I mean, it's not
like you ever bothered to let anyone know you were still around, or check in
to see if your help was needed, or anything," she added pointedly.

"Yeah, well, like I told you before, had things to do. And I wasn't at the
crypt because I don't live there anymore."

Willow pulled back far enough to look up at him in confusion. "What do you
mean, you don't live there?"

He glanced down at her briefly before returning his gaze to the others. "Got
sick of not having electricity at the crypt. Decided if I was stuck in
Sunnyhell, might as well be comfortable. Found myself a flat, spent the past
several days moving in and getting settled and what all," he said with a
shrug.

"But...your stuff was there. I saw it."

"Thought I'd start over, love, new furniture and all. Not like I didn't need
to buy a lot of it anyway. Also, the things I'd had in the crypt all
smelled, well, like they'd spent the last couple years in somebody's grave."

"Oh." Now that they'd established that Spike was not dust after all, Willow
let go of him, stepping back to put some space between them. Her uncertainty
about the meaning of his behaviour since the night of her birthday returned
in full force, augmented by the fact that he'd gone so long without
contacting her, not even letting anyone know that he'd decided to move. He'd
hardly even looked at her as he offered his explanation. Suddenly
embarrassed at having let him see how much she'd missed and worried about
him, she returned to her seat, fiddling nervously with the necklace that was
still clutched in one hand.

She remained quiet as the others traded jabs with Spike, attention only
partly on them until she was pulled out of her thoughts by his voice calling
her name. She looked up, having lost track of what was being discussed.

"I said, I didn't give you that bloody thing just so you could carry it
around and look at it, you know," he repeated.

"Oh," she said sheepishly, fastening it back around her neck. She'd barely
finished when they all were surpised by a sudden intake of breath by the one
of them least in need of it. Willow's eyes flew to Spike, growing concerned
at the look on his face. "Spike, are you okay? What's wrong?"

"N-nothing, I just...hadn't realised it would be that...strong," he
answered, a bit shakily.

"Hadn't realised what would be strong?" Xander asked, curious about what
could cause a reaction like that, and wondering if it was something he could
take advantage of in the future.

"Well, I'm not even thinking about biting Willow right now--which I can
prove, since the chip's not going off," he added in response to Buffy's
disbelieving look, "and I *know* it's just the pendant causing it, but...the
instant she put it on, I suddenly felt...ill." Spike himself seemed
confused, and despite her current resentment, even Buffy had to admit that
his reaction seemed genuine.

"Well, at least we know the ritual worked."

Willow couldn't just shrug and accept it the way her friends were doing.
Wordlessly she removed the necklace, her resolve face defying anyone to
comment.

Unfortunately, it seemed Anya was immune. "What are you doing? You know it
doesn't work if you do that, right?"

"I don't think any vampires are going to attack me in the middle of the
Bronze, with the Slayer and Spike right here. And if they do, I can put it
back on; but I don't want Spike to be uncomfortable, so I don't intend to
wear it when he's around unless we expect there to be a need, or I'm helping
patrol, or something. And actually, if it only works on vampires, I don't
need to wear it during the day or when I'm at anyone's home, either, because
of the invitation thing. So I'll only wear it when I'm alone outside at
night, or Spike's not around, or something."

"I told you, pet, I'm fine, and you really should wear it anyway, rather
than risk not having it when it's needed."

"No. I've made my decision, and there's nothing you can do to change my
mind."

"She's not kidding about that," Xander confirmed. "Believe me, I've tried
before."

Buffy looked like she was going to protest, too, but Willow showed her the
resolve face again and she bit back whatever she'd wanted to say.

The remainder of the evening was a tad uncomfortable, between Willow's act
of protest and the uncertainty surrounding Spike's return, so they decided
rather earlier than usual to leave. Splitting up outside the Bronze, they
returned to their various homes; the instant Spike was out of sight, Buffy
insisted that Willow put the pendant back on. Willow got the feeling there
was something more she wanted to say, but whatever it was, she must have
decided it wasn't important, since they returned to their dorm in silence.

As they were getting ready for bed, Willow finally identified what had been
bothering her about Spike's return. "Buffy, when was the last time you saw
Spike? Before tonight, I mean."

"I dunno, couple weeks," she shrugged. "Why?"

"Well, he said he'd already told you he had other stuff he had to do, but I
don't remember him saying anything like that the last few times he helped
us. And I--I was just wondering when I missed that."

"Oh. Um...well, a few days before Spike disappeared, I kinda went over to
his crypt to, uh, see why we hadn't been seeing him as much, and the only
reason he gave was that he 'had better things to do' than hang out with us."

"Oh." Willow was thoughtful for a moment. "Did he, um, say anything else?"

"Er...not really. Just, y'know, typical Spike stuff." Buffy was about to
turn off the light when she decided to add something. "Will...you know I
don't want to interfere with your friendship with Spike, right? I mean, I've
done my best to accept having him around more often, and--and not stake him,
and all. But I've never been comfortable with it. And...well, I don't want
you to forget that there are more ways he could hurt you than just
physically. These past few weeks are proof of that. Don't worry, after this
I'm back to being Supporto Gal, but I really want you to think about what I
said, okay?"

Willow, already subdued from the evening's events, just nodded and settled
into bed, knowing it would be a while before she'd be able to fall asleep.
There was too much she needed to think about.

Part 10

They saw him at the Bronze again a few nights later, and once more the
following week. A couple of weeks after that, he turned up unexpectedly for
a research session. Slowly, Spike resumed his former place in the group,
though some distance remained. The lack of trust between him and the
Scoobies was a bit more pronounced than it had been before Willow's birthday
and his "death". It took a while, but eventually they all began relaxing
around each other again, though it wasn't for several weeks that he began to
repair his friendship with Willow.

The few times she found herself alone with him to any degree, Willow
couldn't help feeling unusually self-conscious. Between his behaviour the
night of her birthday, subsequent withdrawal, and sudden disappearance, she
didn't know how to behave around him anymore. Were they still friends? She'd
like to think so, but the way he'd been acting didn't seem too
promising...on the other hand, he *had* come back, and surely they couldn't
expect a vampire like Spike to just effortlessly fit in to a group of
demon-fighting humans without the occasional bout of selfishness, right?
They'd almost let themselves forget he was still a demon, and it was unfair
to expect him to constantly act as if he weren't. The least they could do
was let him have some alone time periodically; it had nothing to do with
them, she kept telling herself.

Sometimes that even helped.

                         *************

Gradually, though, Willow found her uncertainty fading. As Spike continued
to spend time around the group, she discovered that the two of them
naturally began to fall into their old patterns; at first only when the
whole gang was together, but without even noticing it happening she began
doing things just with him, as well. By the time she realised that they had
rebuilt their former closeness, she was already spending nearly half of her
free time in his new apartment.

She was in fact just about to call over there one night to let him know that
she wouldn't be dropping by because something apocalypsy had come up and she
was needed for research when the door of Giles' apartment flew open and
Spike ran in, clearly agitated. He relaxed only slightly when he caught
sight of Willow. "Oh, thank god you're still here!" he proclaimed, ignoring
the surprised looks he was receiving as he swiftly crossed the room to
crouch before her. She exchanged a confused look with Buffy, only to have
her attention brought back to the vampire in front of her when he grabbed
her hands.

"Willow, I want you to promise me you will never, and I mean *never*, set
foot outside this flat, or, or Xander's, or your parents' house without
wearing the Kamarás Pendant. I don't care how public a place is, or who's
with you; you wear it anyway. Even in the dorm; they're public places,
you're not safe there either."

"Um...why?"

"Promise!" His grip on her hands tightened reflexively.

"Okay, okay, I promise." She didn't really like being told what to do, but
he seemed genuinely worried about her, and she was willing to give him the
benefit of the doubt. Well, and she was kind of hoping if he got what he
wanted he wouldn't break her fingers by accident or anything.

"Thank you," he whispered feelingly.

"Um, anyone wanna tell me what's going on?" Buffy asked.

Releasing Willow, Spike ran one of his hands through his hair and turned
slightly so he could talk to them all at once. "Well, pet, it seems the one
vampire you lot ought to fear most has come back...."

"Angel's gone evil again?!?" Xander exclaimed.

"No, you fool. My sire may be a right sadistic bastard, but at least he's
more or less sane. If you know him well enough, you can have a go at
predicting what he'll do next, and his motivations usually make sense. It's
not him, it's--"

"Oh, dear lord," Giles broke in, realising what he was about to say.
"Drusilla."

"Yeah. She's back in Sunnyhell. Saw her myself not ten minutes ago."

"Great. Just when I think I've got things under control around here and can
maybe relax a bit on patrol, the Hellmouth throws this at me. First yet
another psycho intent on ending the world, and now Drusilla. Because god
knows, Buffy's not allowed to have even a moment of peace...."

"Okay, I'm clearly missing something. I've heard some of why you'd be afraid
of Angel, but what's so bad about this Drusilla?" Riley wondered.

Spike stood and began pacing. "Well, for starters, she's off her head. I
lived with her for more than a century, and I *still* couldn't tell you how
her mind works. She does things based on what the stars and this old doll
tell her, and on her psychic visions. Which, you know, makes it just a
little tricky to figure out what she'll do next, not to mention what she's
after. Also, she was trained by Angelus at his worst, so she's pretty
devious and cruel even without the insanity."

"And you think she's here for Willow?"

"No, you ponce, not specifically. Probably after the Slayer or something,
assuming she even came here for a reason at all. But I'm not taking any
chances; if she sees Red, Dru's bound to remember that she's the one who
took her precious Daddy away from her the last time, and there's no telling
what she'll do then. So you're wearing that pendant," he repeated, giving
Willow a look that bore a startling resemblance to her own Resolve Face.

"But Buffy's the one who sent Angel to Hell."

"No, Xander, he means the spell," Willow realised, stunned. "I'm the one who
gave Angel his soul back. That's what she would be mad about."

"Exactly. So you see why you can't take any chances. Hell, I probably know
her better than anyone, and I never could predict what she'd do. Was one of
the things I loved about her. But now, it just makes her even more
dangerous."

"Do you have any idea why she might be here, Spike?"

He turned to the Watcher and shook his head. "You know as much as I about
why she's back. I didn't speak to her; just heard her voice, got close
enough to verify it really was Dru, and came straight here. Haven't heard
from her in, what, two and a half years or thereabouts. No telling what
she's up to these days."

"All right then. Here's what we'll do. We can't have her wandering around
Sunnydale, causing who knows what trouble. Even without you or Angel helping
her, that's something I don't believe any of us want to face again. And yet,
we have more immediate issues to deal with just now; keeping the world from
ending has to take precedence over a single vampire, however dangerous.

"But to be safe we ought to have regular information on her activities, so
we can take action if and when she does start planning something that must
also be stopped. And the only way I can see to guarantee that is if she is
staying with you, Spike. You can keep an eye on her, try to talk her out of
any such ideas she may have."

"Wait, now, hold on a minute! First of all, maybe I don't want her staying
with me. And second, she's not going to want to have anything to do with me,
not after I've been helping you lot. That's why she left me before,
remember? Only now, I can't even bring her any presents to try and win her
over, thanks to the chip."

"Okay, I'm lost again," Riley admitted. "What does the chip have to do with
bringing a girl presents?"

"You probably don't want to know, but it seems that vampires' ideas of
romantic gifts tend to be more of the recently-living variety than ours.
What was it? 'Beautiful dresses with beautiful girls in them'?" Willow asked
with a teasing grin, turning to Spike.

"Very funny, pet. But yeah. If I were trying to get her back, which is the
only reason I can think of that she'd believe me asking her to stay with me,
she'd expect me to kill for her. Not that it matters, since by now she's
probably already heard that I've been working with the Slayer--again--so
chances are she'll just tell me to sod off. Only she won't be quite so nice
about it."

"Yes, well, I'm afraid you'll just have to find a way to convince her, as we
have no other choice for the time being. We can decide what to do about her
if necessary after we've managed to get this other situation under control.
In the meantime, I agree that everyone should take extra precautions when
going out after sundown. That includes you, Buffy," Giles added pointedly.

"But, Giles--"

"I mean it, Buffy. Spike's right, Drusilla is more of a threat than the
average vampire, and I don't want you getting careless. You're all too apt
to take chances you shouldn't, and we need to focus on the impending
apocalypse first."

"I'd think you'd want to get rid of her at least as much as I do," the
Slayer muttered, sulking.

A pained expression appeared briefly on Giles' face before being replaced by
one of determination. "I would rather not have to worry about what she'd do
to you, actually. We mustn't let desire for revenge cause us to start acting
irrationally."

"Oh, all right," she sighed. "But I'm not happy about it. And," she added,
turning to Spike, "if I happen to run across her hunting while I'm on
patrol, I'm not promising I won't do my job and slay her anyway."

"Fine by me," he shrugged.

The issue having been settled, temporarily at least, Giles shifted into
Watcher mode. "Now, Spike, since you're here you should grab a book and
start researching. Willow will fill you in on the details...."

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