Summary: a moment in time, a change of heart
Disclaimer: I have shoes… but no Spike.
Distribution: take it if you want it
Feedback: would be nice
Notes: I actually don’t give a damn if you don’t like this, I do. So neh.
Spike stubbed out his cigarette and crushed it beneath his boot as he stared up at the window.
He gave a huge, unnecessary sigh. She was sleeping, how could she be
sleeping when he was torn up inside?
After he confessed his love she refused to see him at all.
All he’d wanted was someone to care about, he was drawn to emotionally stunted women, and Spike knew this. First Dru and then Buffy. Both so similar it was scary. They both had issues and although physically strong, they were emotionally weak and they needed someone’s strong shoulder to lean on. He wanted to be that shoulder. He wanted, no needed, to be needed, although it would be nice if they’d at least acknowledge him occasionally. He was love’s bitch… maybe. Why couldn’t he fall in love with a girl who was packing a full set of marbles?
He sighed and went to leave the girls to whatever and return to his
darkness when he heard the sound of a door opening.
It was on the second floor, a balcony leading to the French doors of a room he had never been into.
She appeared like a vision in a short white satin slip. It was sleeveless contrasting with her pale skin making her look so much more ethereal. Her hair streamed behind her in the breeze and his none existent breath caught in his throat. She was a vision, a goddess.
She walked to the balcony’s edge in silence, tiptoeing almost and came up against the railing. She lifted her bare foot and placed it on the first bar and holding onto the rail climbed up the next few bars until her knees rested against the rail. She took a deep breath and for a wild second Spike panicked that she would jump off the balcony to be dashed to the ground.
She spread her arms wide and turned her head up towards the stars, exhaling deeply.
Looking up from his position Spike saw her as she blended in with the darkness, with the bright glittery star and moonlight. Until she was one with the night in a way that Vampire’s and other creatures of the night only could dream of being. She looked like was flying through the sky, her arms spread like a bird, or a sacrifice. A perfect being.
Spike knew he could see strength in her even with her eyes closed and spread out all vulnerable. Not physical strength but emotional, spiritual, mental, although the total opposite of what he had had or thought he wanted her couldn’t help being drawn to it, like a moth to a fire. Knowing full well that it was skirting with death, death in its truest sense. Knowing that it would be burnt and forever changed but unable- unwilling- to break the embrace. She was a girl who had touched darkness, who knew what it was to hurt and could still walk with her head held high. She radiated the kind of innocence to make him cry but a core of true steel that he could only dream of aspiring to.
A breeze made the satin ripple against her skin moulding to her slight curves and further elevated the image of her flying. Her eyes opened and he would have given all that he had, all he ever had, to see into them right now; to understand why and how and be one with the peace that he was sure to find in them. A slight smile graced her features and she climbed down and turned to go back inside.
Spike was shaken out of his paralysis and turned to leave with some
confusion. How had his whole world changed in just a few minutes?
He had come to see the Slayer, maybe catch some perverted thrill out of knowing that she lay naked a few feet away from where he stood. Now all he could think about was the Siren, the goddess that had more strength of will and character than he had ever known one person to possess, more heart and more feeling. And it didn’t hurt that she had a full set of marbles.
How odd to change in affection from the Slayer to her best friend. Yet thoughts of Willow danced in his head; her head thrown back, her whole being alive as she became one with the night, flying. One day maybe she’d let him fly with her.